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Small Talk: We'll Be Right Back


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32 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

I work with and for actual millionaires who leave trash sitting on the kitchen counter. They don't put their glasses and mugs in the dishwasher six inches away from the sink in which they dump them instead. They count on the fact that someone will pick up after them. People just suck.

My husband's not a millionaire but you've described him perfectly.   He just can't seem to bring himself to put crap in the garbage.   It's like a trash can killed his Pa -- he can't go near one. 

He is the one who takes the trash to the curb on pick-up day.  Maybe he thinks if he doesn't put anything in the bin, there won't be anything to carry out. 

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I still chuckle thinking of the scene in Safe Passage when Susan Sarandon gets thoroughly fed up with long-time husband Sam Shepard when he tosses his used tea bag into the sink instead of the garbage, as he always does -- she snaps, "For 25 years, you have been dunking your tea bag exactly seven times and throwing it in the sink.  Who do you think throws that tea bag in the garbage?"  He responds, "Where's the garbage?"

And this:

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It's like a trash can killed his Pa -- he can't go near one. 

Is classic.  I have a friend whose husband always puts his dirty dishes in the sink rather than undergoing that arduous task of moving a foot to the right and opening the dishwasher.  If she ever files for divorce, I swear it's going to be Petitioner's Exhibit A (or an affirmative defense for why she smashed a dirty plate over his head; could go either way at some point).  Anyway, I am going to change "trash can" to "dishwasher" and share it with her.

Examples like these are just two of the 873 reasons I choose to live alone.

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1 hour ago, bilgistic said:

I work with and for actual millionaires who leave trash sitting on the kitchen counter. They don't put their glasses and mugs in the dishwasher six inches away from the sink in which they dump them instead. They count on the fact that someone will pick up after them. People just suck.

:(  I'm sorry!

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10 hours ago, Bastet said:

I still chuckle thinking of the scene in Safe Passage when Susan Sarandon gets thoroughly fed up with long-time husband Sam Shepard when he tosses his used tea bag into the sink instead of the garbage, as he always does -- she snaps, "For 25 years, you have been dunking your tea bag exactly seven times and throwing it in the sink.  Who do you think throws that tea bag in the garbage?"  He responds, "Where's the garbage?"

And this:

Is classic.  I have a friend whose husband always puts his dirty dishes in the sink rather than undergoing that arduous task of moving a foot to the right and opening the dishwasher.  If she ever files for divorce, I swear it's going to be Petitioner's Exhibit A (or an affirmative defense for why she smashed a dirty plate over his head; could go either way at some point).  Anyway, I am going to change "trash can" to "dishwasher" and share it with her.

Examples like these are just two of the 873 reasons I choose to live alone.

And this is why I'm starting the arduous task of my training 14 (next week!) year old son to stop putting his dirty dishes on the pass through counter and go all the way around to the dishwasher. To be fair, when he was younger, it was easier to have him put it on the counter because I would take it while cleaning up the rest of the kitchen. But, the kids are old enough now to really start doing some of the everyday cleaning stuff. It'll become routine for him if I put in the time and enforce the routine. And he'll cheerfully strip his bed and put the sheets in the laundry and take the garbage out. But we're still at the stage where I have to tell him. I figure if I start now, when he's out on his own his apartment won't look like a disaster zone. 

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23 hours ago, Brattinella said:

Our neighborhood is pristine, everyone keeps their grass cut, etc.  Not a lick of trash or dog poop.  In the town proper, there are no blowing mini-tornadoes of paper trash, no mounds of garbage everywhere that everyone ignores.  The only place that DOES have trash is the alleys; where the dumpsters are.  Crap neatly placed inside and the lids closed.  This place is wonderful!

I'm sorry you have to live in cities!  Hugs!

Depends on where in the city you are. In the "owner-occupied" sections, people care how their property looks and don't dump on their neighbors. The worst is the government-owned housing because tenants know that workers will eventually come along and clean things up again.

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54 minutes ago, LoneHaranguer said:

Depends on where in the city you are. In the "owner-occupied" sections, people care how their property looks and don't dump on their neighbors. The worst is the government-owned housing because tenants know that workers will eventually come along and clean things up again.

Absolutely true.  "Someone will pick it up, it's okay if I trash my neighborhood.  Living like a pig is good, especially if it is FREE!"

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2 hours ago, friendperidot said:

Cobalt Stargazer, guess towing depends and if it's not much or a lot of money depends too. My car was totaled 2 weeks ago, it was older, paid for, I'm on a very tiny SS retirement, I didn't have towing. $176 for towing it a mile and refusing to give an estimate to tow it another mile to my home so they can put it in their lot and charge $111/day is a hell of a lot of money. And then bullying my 17 yr old great nephew to signing over the car to them before he could collect his personal belongings. I'm thinking law suit, wish I could afford an attorney. And my name was the only name on car title, of course the asshole tow driver called me and screamed at me that I had to sign the car over to him, right that minute. I was home sick and am still sick. Hard to think.

Sorry to hear of your tow truck nightmare, @friendperidot. I've never had a car get totaled, although someone did steal my Honda scooter right out of the driveway a couple of years ago. Does insurance never cover towing at all? I use Nationwide instead of Liberty Mutual, but I'd think you could get that included in your policy.

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I've had problems with asshole tow truck drivers before, for just about the same reason, and same results.  They need to be sued!  They are comparable to charging 600 bucks for a shot, because it will save your life, and they are the only game in town! :(

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25 minutes ago, Cobalt Stargazer said:

Does insurance never cover towing at all? I use Nationwide instead of Liberty Mutual, but I'd think you could get that included in your policy.

It's a very common option and usually very cheap to add (or from some companies, it's basic and not something you can opt out of). I think I saved $10 on my annual premium by opting out of it (because I have AAA). Basically, if your policy includes "roadside assistance", it's included. If your policy does not; it doesn't. I can't speak to most insurance companies since I have only ever dealt with three, but every time I got a quote it was an option. I think most of the major carriers offer that. A bare-bones minimum-required-coverage policy may not. I'm probably the wrong market for that ad, but when I saw it, it seemed odd to me someone would be surprised about whether or not they had that coverage. So I don't know if the point here was "no surprises, it's always included" or if they're doing that bitch-move thing they do like with the "new car replacement" bit too, where they call out a feature most insurance companies will gladly let you pay for but implying its somehow unique to them.

Edited by theatremouse
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It was a one car accident, a tire blew out on the interstate. I didn't have towing on my liability only insurance. This was the first time I had a car totaled. Since it was a liability only insurance, there is no claim, no insurance involvement. It's my problem. And I really don't know what I can do about it. My retirement check was a couple of weeks away, I had less than $5 to my name, and my retirement check is very small, certainly not big enough to pay for things like utilities, food and a $300-$500 towing/storage bill. Btw, I had "The General, it's truly crappy and was going to change it before the end of the year. That's not happening now. And if and when I figure out getting another vehicle, the General, I will not be rushing back to.

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Speaking of towing companies, we had a car stolen when we lived in a city.  It was found about a mile from a junk yard, without just enough parts removed from it to make it worthless to us.  It was an older car, paid for, just liability insurance.  The towing company was affiliated with the junk yard, and they offered us $100 for the car.  We took it.  It didn't hit me until later that it could have been a criminal operation.  Steal the car (maybe even tow it) -- there was no damage to the ignition -- remove a few parts, check to when it's reported stolen, contact the owner, buy the damn car, replace the parts and sell it at a profit. 

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I was just reading the SFgate news site, and one headline is "LOOK - SOMEONE ON BART ACTUALLY USED A TRASH CAN" :D

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Rider Houston Garcia says she snapped this photo o[f] a rider transporting a full-sized Recology bin on the Richmond line Thursday morning. Nobody on the train asked the man about his carry-on. 

"However, some people threw additional trash in the bin," said Garcia.

 

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On 8/25/2016 at 9:11 AM, frenchtoast said:

And this is why I'm starting the arduous task of my training 14 (next week!) year old son to stop putting his dirty dishes on the pass through counter and go all the way around to the dishwasher. To be fair, when he was younger, it was easier to have him put it on the counter because I would take it while cleaning up the rest of the kitchen. But, the kids are old enough now to really start doing some of the everyday cleaning stuff. It'll become routine for him if I put in the time and enforce the routine. And he'll cheerfully strip his bed and put the sheets in the laundry and take the garbage out. But we're still at the stage where I have to tell him. I figure if I start now, when he's out on his own his apartment won't look like a disaster zone. 

His future spouse/partner will thank you.

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But only if you teach him how to load dishes properly.

The ex had extraordinary (sp?) spatial and packing skills as evidenced by his ability to bend the laws of physics/space-time dimension with the crap tonnage of stuff in the garage.  However, loading dishes in dishwasher?  All the order and precision of a Rotschach image or a Picasso.

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4 hours ago, backformore said:

Speaking only for myself, I relied on my kids' pediatrician to figure out which vaccinations they needed at different ages.   She was pretty spot on, was well-informed as to all the latest research, and for the most part went along with the recommendations of the American Academy of Pediatrics.  Every year, the recommendations change, and I disagree that parents should feel guilty about not staying on top of all the changes. 

Y'know, I was gonna stay out of this, and then I figured, Why start now?

As I said earlier, I don't have kids because of reasons, but my parents made sure I got my shots when I was a kid, and then a teenager. I had to get a hepatitis shot once, because the city sewer backed up into our house (don't ask) and we all had to get vaccinated. My arm must have been sore for a week, but I'd rather deal with a sore arm in the face of being potentially infected by something a lot worse.

I realize its a complicated - and controversial - subject, but I consider myself pretty well-informed about it. Its a fact of life that no one likes going to the doctor, and outside of getting tattooed twice I can't abide needles. But people like Jenny McCarthy*, who in the past has claimed that getting vaccinated against several things in one sitting can cause autism, spread unnecessary fear and panic about something that's been beneficial to a lot of people.

*hops off of soap box*

*In no way am I comparing @Brattinella to Jenny McCarthy. But that's always who I think of first when this topic comes up. And now I'm gonna stay out of it. :-)

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My son has autism - don't believe it was caused by the MMR vaccine, but it was right at the time where all the initial link to that was coming out.  I did read an article that suggested that the cumulative number of vaccines an infant/young child gets is tough on their immune system.  That did make sense to me.  I spoke with my pediatrician when my daughter was born and while she believed the existing vaccines and schedule were safe, she suggested that if I had concerns we space them out a bit more and get single dose vaccinations for the 3 in the standard MMR.  She had to order them special and my daughter had to go through 3 vaccinations spread over time rather than one.  Not sure it made a difference, but it made me feel a touch better.

There are so many unknowns when it comes to autism, I know I was overwhelmed when we got the diagnosis.  Not having anything in my background to help me feel confident I understood the tons of medical research was frustrating beyond words.  I don't blame other parents in similar positions for latching on to a theory of cause - and it may line up better in the incident in their family.  I do find it grossly irresponsible for them to publicly assert a definitive cause-effect link when they are not qualified to do so and there are so many unknowns about the condition.

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My one and only addition to the Gardasil/vaccination conversation is that the link to more information posted in the commercial thread is 7 years old and contains misinformation, especially regarding alleged cases of severe reactions/death caused by the vaccine.

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3 hours ago, Brattinella said:

I can find you some more recent articles if you'd like to read them.

I don't have kids, so I have no dog in this particular fight.  I do, however, think that unless there is a legitimate medical reason for a child not to receive the standard childhood vaccinations, they should be vaccinated.  And that every state should require them for public school attendance with medical exemptions only.  Those who can't be vaccinated need the herd immunity.

I certainly wish the chickenpox vaccination had been available before I was 11.  Would've saved me a lot of unpleasantness, plus I wouldn't have needed the shingles vaccine.

Edited by proserpina65
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3 hours ago, proserpina65 said:

My one and only addition to the Gardasil/vaccination conversation is that the link to more information posted in the commercial thread is 7 years old and contains misinformation, especially regarding alleged cases of severe reactions/death caused by the vaccine.

OK, BUT - the discussion had been about the commercials with young people trying to make their parents guilty for not giving them the vaccination when they were younger.  My point, in posting a link to the article,  Gardasil vaccine ,  was that it's not fair to make parents feel guilty for NOT giving a vaccine that was, at the time, untested and not recommended universally by pediatricians. 

whether the vaccination is safe or not, I have no idea.   I do know that my reaction to the commercial that asks "Did you know?"  was anger, because it judges parents in hindsight, without acknowledging that most parents do the best they can with the information they have at the time.   Parenting is a series of decisions, not just one, and for most of those decisions, you can find experts who contradict each other, making those decisions more difficult, even when you do the research.

the idea of kids calling their parents out on one of those decisions, saying they should have made a different one,  makes me angry.  As does the idea that if you didn't give your kids this particular vaccine, you are a pearl-clutching parent who didn't want to give your kids permission to have sex.

Edited by backformore
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1 minute ago, backformore said:

OK, BUT - the discussion had been about the commercials with young people trying to make their parents guilty for not giving them the vaccination when they were younger.  My point, in posting a link to the article,  Gardasil vaccine ,  was that it's not fair to make parents feel guilty for NOT giving a vaccine that was, at the time, untested and not recommended universally by pediatricians. 

whether the vaccination is safe or not, I have no idea.   I do know that my reaction to the commercial that asks "Did you know?"  was anger, because it judges parents in hindsight, without acknowledging that most parents do the best they can with the information they have at the time.   Parenting is a series of decisions, not just one, and for most of those decisions, you can find experts who contradict each other, making those decisions more difficult, even when you do the research.

the idea of kids calling their parents out on one of those decisions, saying they should have made a different one,  makes me angry. 

That's why I posted my comment here and not in the actual commercial thread.  I do agree that the commercial campaign is manipulative, and that there must be a better way to get across that there is a vaccine now.

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 A major difference between how WE (as children) got vaccinated and how children are vaccinated NOW is:

We usually got 1-3 vaccines in 1 shot.  They are cramming at least a dozen vaccines into one shot now.  I think the current "recommended" amount of vaccines for children is 117 total virii.

 I saw a video of babies getting this "mega-shot" and it was the most horrifying screams!  Every one of them!  I've seen lots of vaccinations before (siblings) and it was NOTHING like that!  There are suspicious substances in the vaccine "medium" , the solution in which the virus is suspended.  There have been instances of instead of using chicken for the vaccine source (so as to avoid THAT allergen) they have used human fetal tissue instead.  Plus, there are cases of children dropping dead on the spot.  Brain-injury.  One boy I read about just yesterday was paralyzed from the chest down from one vaccination.

41 minutes ago, proserpina65 said:

Those who can't be vaccinated need the herd immunity.

I so agree!

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20 hours ago, Brattinella said:

 A major difference between how WE (as children) got vaccinated and how children are vaccinated NOW is:

We usually got 1-3 vaccines in 1 shot.  They are cramming at least a dozen vaccines into one shot now.  I think the current "recommended" amount of vaccines for children is 117 total virii.

 I saw a video of babies getting this "mega-shot" and it was the most horrifying screams!  Every one of them!  I've seen lots of vaccinations before (siblings) and it was NOTHING like that!  There are suspicious substances in the vaccine "medium" , the solution in which the virus is suspended.  There have been instances of instead of using chicken for the vaccine source (so as to avoid THAT allergen) they have used human fetal tissue instead.  Plus, there are cases of children dropping dead on the spot.  Brain-injury.  One boy I read about just yesterday was paralyzed from the chest down from one vaccination.

All of this has been thoroughly debunked by legitimate medical studies.  There is no credible evidence to support these allegations.  And I'm leaving this discussion now because anything further would start to get ugly.

Edited by proserpina65
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It's become clear that the vaccine discussion is not going to able to discussed respectfully. Let's move back to dishwasher, kitty litter and why dog movies and taking bets on whether I'll cry on Thursday, first day of high school for my eldest.

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So, I didn't actually cry, but I certainly choked up. Before even getting him out the door! It's his birthday today, so I got a misty eyed wishing him a happy birthday. And then prepping him for his first day at high school. There's a whole boatload of other kids who will be lost wandering the halls which is something of a comfort. Sort of.

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Happy birthday and good luck in HS to FrenchToastJr. My youngest started his final year of middle school on Monday, so I am getting all nostalgic myself; I'll never have another middle-schooler again. I'll probably get all misty when he starts HS next year, and will be a full on mess when he graduates.

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On 8/25/2016 at 9:00 PM, AuntiePam said:

Speaking of towing companies, we had a car stolen when we lived in a city.  It was found about a mile from a junk yard, without just enough parts removed from it to make it worthless to us.  It was an older car, paid for, just liability insurance.  The towing company was affiliated with the junk yard, and they offered us $100 for the car.  We took it.  It didn't hit me until later that it could have been a criminal operation.  Steal the car (maybe even tow it) -- there was no damage to the ignition -- remove a few parts, check to when it's reported stolen, contact the owner, buy the damn car, replace the parts and sell it at a profit. 

If it was Lincoln towing in Chicago, I'd say you are right.  They were famous for towing cars that weren't even parked illegally, and charging you to get them back.  And most people paid it, rather than chance the car sitting in the tow lot until you could go to court.   See Steve Goodman's song "Lincoln park pirates".  

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Here's the song I was referring to:

for reference - this is a real towing company.  The people working there are scary, mean guys (The line "Charm school in Joliet"  refers to Joliet prison).  Any establishment can contract to have them tow cars that are in their lots.  They put up a sign  "customers only, others will be towed"  but even customers of the place can have cars towed.  and sometimes the sign is small and you don't even see it.  It's  really like they steal your car and hold it for ransom.  Yeah, you can go to court, but it will take longer and cost more.  People will pay the "ransom"  in order to get their cars back so they can go to work.   They're actually  under investigation this year, but it's kind of a joke, because they're been operating a shady business for at least 40 years.

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From "Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage":

On August 10, 2016 at 9:12 AM, TattleTeeny said:

Why don't we just completely ditch plastic grocery bags? I get that they're cheap and convenient and blah-blah-blah, and maybe some people will get all salty about being told no, but who cares? I admit to doing my share of badness with them (two cats, two litter boxes to clean every day—but I am a responsible recycler of everything else), but I am a grownup who will figure out another way, you know? 

No need to ban plastic bags—just reuse them: http://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2016/09/to-tote-or-note-to-tote/498557/

Quote

In 2008, the UK Environment Agency (UKEA) published a study of resource expenditures for various bags: paper, plastic, canvas, and recycled-polypropylene tote bags. Surprisingly, the authors found that in typical patterns of use and disposal, consumers seeking to minimize pollution and carbon emissions should use plastic grocery bags and then reuse those bags at least once—as trash-can liners or for other secondary tasks.

Conventional plastic bags made from high-density polyethylene (HDPE, the plastic sacks found at grocery stores) had the smallest per-use environmental impact of all those tested. Even though they don’t easily degrade, they require very few resources to manufacture and transport. They produce less carbon, waste, and byproducts than cotton or paper bags. They’re recyclable. They’re cheap.

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Thank you, @editorgrrl and @Brattinella.  Now I don't feel so bad every time I forget to bring in one of my (many) reusable tote bags.  I even keep them in the car, but there I'll be at check-out before I realize I should have brought one or more in.  I always reuse my bags, mostly as trashcan liners, but also for kitty litter and other things.


ETA: Don't get me wrong.  I'll still use my reusable tote bags as often as I can.

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Yeah, I like my canvas bags because I can get more in and they're sturdier. And I can carry them easier. That being said, one of my dogs does his business on his walks despite having a great big backyard. And I don't carry my scooper on the walks. (Walking two greyhounds and carrying a scooper? Nope.) So I use the grocery bags or the Target bags (those are better) to pick up after my dog. One handed!

What I really want to do is use a backyard waste disposal, like this, instead of bagging dog waste. But we live in rocky soil New England and hubby has said he's not digging that deep without heavy duty equipment. 

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2 hours ago, frenchtoast said:

What I really want to do is use a backyard waste disposal, like this, instead of bagging dog waste. But we live in rocky soil New England and hubby has said he's not digging that deep without heavy duty equipment. 

I wonder if you could bury that in one of those large wooden planter boxes.  An upside is that you wouldn't have to bend over very far to make the deposits.  Then again, it would probably freeze up in winter.  My mom had something similar and she said it worked great.

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I had thought the reason why I had to now pay for those insubstantial plastic bags at the grocery store was because of recycling issues, but no. I later learned all the stores were doing it here, in my county (I live in MD) and DC was because of the litter situation. Their thinking was: no plastic bags obtained free of charge, decrease in littering.

Me: Rolling my eyes, because that surely hasn't happened. And it turns out all the other counties don't charge for them. I won't lie, I use those danged things to keep my recyclable items separated and also keeps my recycle bin clean.  Not to mention, use it for smaller garbage, since these bags are recyclable anyway. Hey, that's what I was told by the rep of the county's recycle when they came to my apartment complex a couple years ago and schooled us all on what is recyclable and what is not.

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In Canada, grocery stores are now charging 5 cents  for the plastic bags, walmart, loblaws, etc. they want people to bring recyclable cloth bags or reuse the plastic bags, I too use the plastic bags for garbage bins in the bathroom and laundry room, sometimes I forget to bring the recyclable cloth bags so I either buy 1 plastic bags for smaller items and just carry the big items or no bags at all.

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I was under the impression the opposition to plastic bags wasn't really about people reusing them or not, nor their impact in terms of landfill space or biodegradability. I thought the issue was the choking hazard for birds and fish. IE, relatively few of them need to be littered or otherwise get out in the wild to cause problems for wildlife. So it was more about reducing their existence overall. It's certainly good that people reuse them (I do too) but the move to push for canvas (or whathaveyou) was mostly about choking fish. I can't tell if "the smallest per-use environmental impact of all those tested" accounts for that or if they're just talking about the manufacture process of them compared to how frequently people reuse them.

 

Or if I've been duped by The Man.

Edited by theatremouse
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Hmm.  Being a born and bred californian (NOT bragging here, either) I remember the word going out about plastic bags because of the land-fill problems.  I DO remember the plastic 6-pack rings being a HUGE problem to wildlife (so we cut them up).  Maybe they started talking about bags being dangerous to fish after I was out of school?  70's, 80's, 90's?

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Certainly yeah the can-holders are supposed to be cut, and nowadays they usually have more perforations in the past so even if someone doesn't slice 'em before tossing, it takes less effort for it to break itself apart. 

The thing with the bags that I was thinking of above is more like an "in the past five years" deal. Way more recent than the can rings stuff.

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From the "Commercials that Annoy" thread (I'm answering a post there by  @Brattinella):

Quote

It appears (so far) that the first HPV vaccine was available in 2006.  That's only 10 years ago.  I haven't found where they first linked it to cancer.

The first solid link was made in 1999, but a link was suspected as early as the 1950s, according to this article. http://scienceblog.cancerresearchuk.org/2014/09/16/hpv-the-whole-story-warts-and-all/

Edited by legaleagle53
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8 minutes ago, legaleagle53 said:

From the "Commercials that Annoy" thread (I'm answering a post there by  @Brattinella):

The first solid link was made in 1999, but a link was suspected as early as the 1950s, according to this article. http://scienceblog.cancerresearchuk.org/2014/09/16/hpv-the-whole-story-warts-and-all/

Thank you for finding that!  I did read that earlier, it is from the UK.  What I am saying is the current commercials for HPV-vaccine are very misleading, if the vaccine was only created in 2006.  The teens in the commercial (appearing to be 14-15) could not have been 10 or 11 years old in 2006.  I agree that the vaccine is a very good thing; the commercials are deceptive.

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On ‎8‎/‎19‎/‎2016 at 10:36 AM, Prevailing Wind said:

You eventually get to an age where your motto becomes "Never Pass Up An Opportunity To Pee."  That's the one thing I regret about my lost youth.

That was our motto during our family reunion in Germany a few years ago! Using pay toilets got old very fast.

On ‎8‎/‎22‎/‎2016 at 9:18 PM, Phebemarie said:

To continue the cat litter discussion, I recommend The World's Best Cat Litter.  Yes, the name is a little much, but it's really great.  There are several different formula:  one is made from pine, the other from corn.  Supposedly, you can flush the stuff, but I'm always afraid of clogs.  

I heard one shouldn't flush dirty kitty litter b/c our water treatment plants aren't equipped to handle the parasites and other tiny critters in cat feces. 

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On 8/29/2016 at 3:38 PM, backformore said:

OK, BUT - the discussion had been about the commercials with young people trying to make their parents guilty for not giving them the vaccination when they were younger.  My point, in posting a link to the article,  Gardasil vaccine ,  was that it's not fair to make parents feel guilty for NOT giving a vaccine that was, at the time, untested and not recommended universally by pediatricians. 

I would be a terrible Gardasil commercial:  "Mom? Dad?  You know that vaccine you never got me?  Don't sweat it.  I still can't get laid."

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