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Small Talk: We'll Be Right Back


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I have a friend who is a professional actor.  She often goes to focus groups.  It's a little extra money and a way to get her face seen.  The funny thing is when she's broke she'll be anyone they want her to be.  To date I know she has been a homemaker, a mother of three, an architect, a designer, from the midwest, west, east and south US; she supposedly often goes to spas, stays in hotels, travels to foreign countries, is always home/never travels, drives a foreign/domestic car, never drives, etc.  We always joke about her using her acting skills to be in focus groups.  

 

Another friend was in a local car dealership ad based on just what you said.  It was exciting in a way because he is a transman and Asian, so he helped add diversity to the ad.  His statement was blandly positive.  He fit the mold beautifully for "real people."

 

I used to participate in focus groups.  When I would get bored I would start swaying peoples' opinions for fun.  Yes, I'm that jerk.

 

Finally a friend did a focus group on cheese.  There were a lot of the types of people you describe.  Everyone was trying to one up the other people with their deep, meaningful, expressive comments about cheese and cheese packaging.  It went on for several hours.  My friend reached her patience limit and screamed, "It's cheese, people!  Cheese!  Jesus Christ!  What is wrong with you?  Why do you care so fucking much about cheese?"   That ended the session.  

 

So, Chevy can show us their real people willing to say incredibly stupid things about a Malibu.  Not going to make me want to buy one.  And, having rented one, definitely not buying one.  

Last year I participated in a focus group for a fast food restaurant's new chicken items they wanted to add to their menu. It was interesting but I did get a bit tired of some participants repeatedly referring to how Chik-Fil-A does things.

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Last year I participated in a focus group for a fast food restaurant's new chicken items they wanted to add to their menu. It was interesting but I did get a bit tired of some participants repeatedly referring to how Chik-Fil-A does things.

They would've hated me on that panel. But interesting info, thanks. I've been on panels a few times and always found it interesting. I even ended up on some hiring trainee video once which kind of shocked me. It's easy to forget you sign that paper, then a friend comes up a year later and says I saw you in the video.

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Back to Bronies -

 

OK someone explain this to me.  I am vaguely aware that this is a thing in pop culture and in an age bracket that is much older than I would expect.

 

But I find myself baffled by it.  To me this is like saying, I'm forty years old and I'm still really into the care bears or Rainbow Bright or Strawberry Shortcake.  I was going to add the Smurfs but that seems to edgy or daring relative to My Little Pony.  So what happened in the last however many years to make My Little Pony worthy of fan fiction and Cons, etc.?  Or is there some Care Bear con thing too that I'm unaware of?

 

And I too watch a lot of stuff that I should be to mature for.  But I just can't wrap my head around being into stuff that I liked before I was even a pre-teen.

Edited by ParadoxLost
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OK someone explain this to me.  I am vaguely aware that this is a thing in pop culture and in an age bracket that is much older than I would expect.

 

But I find myself baffled by it.  To me this is like saying, I'm forty years old and I'm still really into the care bears or Rainbow Bright or Strawberry Shortcake.  I was going to add the Smurfs but that seems to edgy or daring relative to My Little Pony.

The revamped MLP owes a lot more to Warner Bros than the saccharine tea party stuff from its first iterations - the first episode of it that I saw had Pinky Pie bouncing around like Pepe Le Pew to a tune very reminiscent of Benny Hill's chase music. They hit the right balance of "stuff to appeal to kids" and "stuff to keep the parents entertained too", and so adults who weren't parents started watching it for that.

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There's a series of regional commercials for The Olde Wicker Mill that air through Time Warner, and one of them promotes their selection of First Communion wear. The owner/spokeswoman greets four girls, whom we see browsing. When they reappear, three of them are wearing the traditional white dress and veil, and the fourth is wearing a suit, like boys do(I had to double check to make sure it was a girl; she has long hair and the owner specifically says "Hello, girls" at the beginning). Do some girls wear suits for First Communion nowadays?

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I would have that thought it more likely that this is their way of saying "we're not stuffy, we acknowledge nontraditional ways to Dress Up." But I will admit that I know literally nothing about the First Communion Wear biz.

 

I've been on panels a few times and always found it interesting. 

 

I was on a panel once, and what was really interesting (I've since discovered) is that its purpose (i.e., what we were testing) wasn't what they said it was. The invitation said that we were invited to watch two sitcom pilots, and give our opinions of their viability as possible series.

 

So we gathered in a hotel ballroom, were greeted by a host who said that to simulate the viewing experience, we would see these pilots complete with commercials. And then they aired them on a movie screen. And I recognized the pilots! They were exactly the same ones a friend had described to me at a similar viewing, a full decade earlier. (I can remember them: one was Bumpers, an MTM show with Richard Masur, and the other was The Ugily Family, about a (you guessed it) "ugly" or ordinary family headed by Al Molinaro, who move to Beverly Hills or Malibu or somewhere, next door to a pretty LA family headed by Lyle Waggoner and Elaine Joyce.) And I asked around, on what passed for the internet in the mid-80s, and discovered that the company doing this kept re-using the same pilots, but what they were really researching was public reaction to the commercials around them (which changed from year to year).

 

Not that it matters, but in my insensitive male way I thought one of the commercials was really stupid and said so: a bride in a white gown tearfully telling her mother on the morning of the wedding that she just got her period, and whatever shall she do?  (And all I could think was, "Nice planning, lady. I'm sure the groom will be happy to hear it tonight.") I'm pretty sure it never aired.

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I don't quite know where to put this, but I'm putting it here since I first learned about it on the commercials thread.

But the woman that Peyton Manning forced to eat his balls and anus while at the University of Tennessee is from my town.

 

http://patch.com/new-jersey/hackettstown/peyton-manning-details-20-year-old-sex-abuse-allegations-made-public-0

It's quite the discussion on the town forum . . . I was so glad I could add some substantive information to "it's a money grab!" due to what I'd found out here.

 

Edited by Aquarius
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Do any of you guys know where I can get that original Herbal Essence shampoo in the green bottle frm the 70s? I love that smell LOVE IT!

That's close but I think the tea tree oil might compromise the freshly cut field of flowers smell the old shampoo had. And I noticed that the manufacturer responded to that complaint in the comments section.

Here's the Herbal Essences link. Maybe you could ask them?

I think the original EE is gone.

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That's close but I think the tea tree oil might compromise the freshly cut field of flowers smell the old shampoo had. And I noticed that the manufacturer responded to that complaint in the comments section.

Here's the Herbal Essences link. Maybe you could ask them?

I think the original EE is gone.

 

1 )  I had no idea people bought shampoo from ebay

b )  I think they re-introduced the original green bottles a couple of years ago, but they seem to have discontinued them again.

iii )  It seems you can get them from Greece...   http://www.ebay.com/itm/UNIQUE-CLAIROL-HERBAL-ESSENCE-SHAMPOO-ORIGINAL-PACK-1-DOZEN-300ml-OILY-HAIR/231862555245?_trksid=p2045573.c100033.m2042&_trkparms=aid%3D111001%26algo%3DREC.SEED%26ao%3D1%26asc%3D20131017132637%26meid%3D0eb7d4ccb0a14e39955606232aaf63bc%26pid%3D100033%26rk%3D3%26rkt%3D4%26sd%3D281777734546

 

Definitely worth the expense.  Maybe.  Not.

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I know we've discussed that TransUnion commercial with all the people singing "Getting to Know You" while snooping for someone's personal info. I don't understand a lot about how credit reporting works, so maybe someone can help me. What good does it do to lock your credit report? Wouldn't it better to lock your info from being used? Or is that what they're doing? Wouldn't locking your credit report keep YOU from buying things? Or are they suggesting you keep it locked at all times, unlocking it only long enough to get a new credit card, buy a car, get a mortgage, etc.? Aren't there legitimate reasons someone would need access to your credit report without calling you each and every time? What if the thief strikes during that time you have it open for your own use? I'm just not seeing the need for this service. How is this different from a service like Life Lock? Thanks in advance for educating me.

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I know we've discussed that TransUnion commercial with all the people singing "Getting to Know You" while snooping for someone's personal info. I don't understand a lot about how credit reporting works, so maybe someone can help me. What good does it do to lock your credit report? Wouldn't it better to lock your info from being used? Or is that what they're doing? Wouldn't locking your credit report keep YOU from buying things? Or are they suggesting you keep it locked at all times, unlocking it only long enough to get a new credit card, buy a car, get a mortgage, etc.? Aren't there legitimate reasons someone would need access to your credit report without calling you each and every time? What if the thief strikes during that time you have it open for your own use? I'm just not seeing the need for this service. How is this different from a service like Life Lock? Thanks in advance for educating me.

 

I'm not sure about locking a credit report but I'd imagine its something like this.

 

If there is some kind of fraud situation affecting you, you can freeze your credit .  Basically any time you (or anyone else) applies for credit or a loan, there are extra hoops to jump through to get approved.  Plus side, you know if its not you/  Downside, I think you have to be reached at a certain phone number to get your own credit approved.  You don't have to unfreeze, just deal with extra hassle.

 

I imagine locking a credit report is monetizing that people don't want companies collecting information about them and selling it so they offer to not sell the information they collected for a fee.

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This is very disturbing!  I've never had anything like blood in an Arby's sandwich; had someone cut their finger?

I must say, though, one of my most favorite things from a grilled steak is steak JUICE (blood) on my baked potato.

Not sure if this info will make a rare to well-done steak more or less appetizing but the "blood" really isn't. It actually is more of a "juice". It's myoglobin.

I think I first heard this on Top Chef so if anyone tries to tell you that watching reality tv is not a learning experience...

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(edited)

Thanks for the info! I tend to lean to the medium-rare steak, so I always get the "juice".

Me too!

And I have to think that a lot of well-doners might change their preferences if they stopped thinking of it as blood.

Edited by NewDigs
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Is anybody else having problems with getting to their Notifications?  Since yesterday afternoon, even though I get a notice that I have notifications, when I try to access them, I just get the notice spinning and spinning and it never comes up.  I've tried creating a Bug report, but it's being ignored.

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31 minutes ago, riley702 said:

Serious question - how do you tip the housekeeper if you never run into her? I'm sure they have very strict rules about not touching any money left out.

I leave the tip on the pillow. You're right, if you leave it on a table or counter or something they probably won't take it thinking it's not a tip.  As for how often, I tip each day I'm there except the last day.  I learned that from my dad, and he tips well each those days he's there so it's not like he's cheating them out of anything on that last day.  

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Sometimes, there's actually an enevelope left with the maid's name on it so you can leave the $$ in it.  If she doesn't leave a note on the notepad, I'll stick the bills under the first sheet of the notepad & write "THANKS!" on it.  And I don't keep the pen, either.  LOL.

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I put it under the pillow but sticking out about halfway.

1 hour ago, aquarian1 said:

I tip each day I'm there except the last day.  I learned that from my dad, and he tips well each those days he's there so it's not like he's cheating them out of anything on that last day.

Just curious, but did he ever tell you the rationale for not tipping on the last day? I think the main thing is to tip each day as you go along, so not tipping on the last day isn't a huge deal, but I'm just wondering why he does it that way. I always tip more on the last day just because the maid has to do a little more in a check out room so that it's ready for the next guest.

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I always tip more on my check-out day, too, since they're doing extra; that's the day they have to change the sheets (I don't have it done daily, because it wastes water and energy).

As for where I leave the tip, there is generally a little card/note stating who the room is cleaned by, so I just put it with that.  Otherwise, I leave it with a note on the table.

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There's a wee sign in the room - if you want the sheets changed, DON'T put the sign on the bed. If you want to save work, & water, etc., put the sign on the bed. So I put the sign on the bed and came back to clean sheets. (?)  The next day I didn't put the sign on the bed, and the sheets weren't changed. I got clean towels each day, no matter if I hung 'em up or put 'em on the floor.  That Best Western Independence Park in Philly is weird.  Handicapped room on the highest floor, furthest from elevator AND stairs.  But there wouldn't be a person in a wheelchair there, anyway - Historic Landmark building, so they can't retro-fit the doors to be wide enough to accommodate wheelchairs.

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We leave a tip every day.  Never thought of leaving more on check-out day, but that's a good idea.  And we usually just leave it on the desk or next to the TV with no note.  They always pick it up (except once - I think we left a note the next day)

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I travel a lot for business, so I'm in hotels all the time.  I leave $5 a day with a little thank you note and there have been many times when I got a very sweet note back!  

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15 hours ago, fishcakes said:

Just curious, but did he ever tell you the rationale for not tipping on the last day? I think the main thing is to tip each day as you go along, so not tipping on the last day isn't a huge deal, but I'm just wondering why he does it that way. I always tip more on the last day just because the maid has to do a little more in a check out room so that it's ready for the next guest.

I think his thought is it's more of a tip for work done thing and a little bit of selfish/pre-emptive thing. If the room is done up well the tip is a bonus for that, like with wait staff in a restaurant or hair dressers, you tip after the meal or the hair cut, not before.  But also tip on the days you're coming back to the room to make sure it keeps being done well and since you're leaving on the last day, you don't need to worry about that.

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If the room is done up well the tip is a bonus for that, like with wait staff in a restaurant or hair dressers, you tip after the meal or the hair cut, not before.

I'm confused by this statement.  If you're tipping every day, then you're leaving the tip in the morning before you go out and do your daily stuff, and coming back to a cleaned room.  So you are tipping before the service.  The tip is waiting for the housekeeper when they enter the room.

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3 hours ago, janie jones said:

I'm confused by this statement.  If you're tipping every day, then you're leaving the tip in the morning before you go out and do your daily stuff, and coming back to a cleaned room.  So you are tipping before the service.  The tip is waiting for the housekeeper when they enter the room.

Someone else said it, but I think you pretty much have to tip housekeepers before the service, since they usually come in when the guests are out for the day. I have had knocks on my door from housekeeping during the few times I've stayed in hotels, but as a general rule they show up and do their work while you're out sightseeing, attending meetings, etc.

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If I'm in a hotel Tues-Fri, for example.  Using my dad's logic, when I tip on Wed it thanks for having a nice clean room to come into the day before.  The tip in Thurs is for the good service on Wed.  But this me trying to explain someone else's logic when told to me in 2 sentences more than a decade ago.  Also, this is very over simplified.  As someone who used to travel every other week for work, I had a "formula" I used, that was simple in my head, meaning I didn't have to think about it, but typing it out looks so complex.  It depends on a variety of things - how long I'm staying, how much I use the room, the type of hotel, day vs night crews, weekday vs weekend crews, how many amenities the room has vs how many I use, if I showered or washed my hair that day, if I needed extra services, if I requested no maid service for any of the stay, if there were people with me...  and so on.

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Maybe not tipping the last day is because the next guest will occupy the room and leave a tip? 

Anyway - Our system of tipping is pretty ridiculous.  There's a tip jar at Starbucks, and people tell me you are expected to tip every time.   Now, the local dunkin Donuts has a tip jar too.  For what?  But not at McD's, or other fast food places.   SO the person pouring coffee in a cup and handing me a donut gets tipped, but not the person giving me a burger and fries?  
And - to make it more confusing, a local grocery store has a starbucks in the store.   You are supposed to tip at the starbucks counter.  Across the aisle is the deli counter.  The people working at the deli cannot accept tips.  When I asked a friend about it, she said that you tip the barrista for getting just the right amount of foam or whatever in your coffee drink.  So I asked, why not tip the person who slices my roast beef just the right thinness, and the cheese thick, just the way I like it?  She said - that's their job!   Yeah, I don't get it.  I can't imagine how people from other countries are supposed to get it.

At the same grocery store, teenagers are bagging groceries.  They offer to help load groceries into customers' cars. Push the cart to the car, load bags in, take  the cart back.   Sometimes, people try to tip them, the workers refuse.  They have had people force tips on them - literally, stuffing a dollar in their pocket.   But accepting a tip is a fire-able offense.

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14 hours ago, aquarian1 said:

If I'm in a hotel Tues-Fri, for example.  Using my dad's logic, when I tip on Wed it thanks for having a nice clean room to come into the day before.  The tip in Thurs is for the good service on Wed.  But this me trying to explain someone else's logic when told to me in 2 sentences more than a decade ago. 

Okay, that makes sense, but the person who comes in on Wednesday and takes the tip is not necessarily the person who cleaned it Tuesday.  It's sort of akin to leaving a tip for a server on a random table and hoping that it's in their section.

8 hours ago, backformore said:

And - to make it more confusing, a local grocery store has a starbucks in the store.   You are supposed to tip at the starbucks counter.  Across the aisle is the deli counter.  The people working at the deli cannot accept tips.  When I asked a friend about it, she said that you tip the barrista for getting just the right amount of foam or whatever in your coffee drink.  So I asked, why not tip the person who slices my roast beef just the right thinness, and the cheese thick, just the way I like it?  She said - that's their job!   Yeah, I don't get it.  I can't imagine how people from other countries are supposed to get it.

One could argue that the slicing machine is what is making the roast beef the right thickness. 

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I guess I'm a terrible person (you all knew this), because I refuse to tip someone who's getting paid a decent wage to make me a coffee for which I'm paying $5.

I am happy to tip regular restaurant wait staff well because they make only $2 and change per hour before tips in my state. But Starbucks pays better than most places you can work with no education or training.

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I worked at McDonald's for a few years, and I provided the best service I was capable of providing without any expectation of a tip (we weren't allowed to accept tips if offered, but I don't know if that was corporate policy vs. my individual store manager). I did get offered a job by a woman that worked at the bank across the street; her boss was so impressed with how well I handled their complicated lunch order every day. I was leaving for college, though, so I couldn't follow up. I don't tip at fast food or quick service dining restaurants, only at sit-down places where they have to take my order and deliver my food. I never really thought too much about the hypocrisy of tipping my bartender but not my barista. 

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Ok, on the tipping question - I never knew until too late that you are supposed to tip hotel housekeepers - or hair stylists.    It never occurred to me, my parents never did it.  Then I read that you should, and now I do. I tip wait staff, bartenders, and if I ever got food delivered, I would tip the delivery person.

I have a family member who tips way more people than I think you're supposed to.  The mail carrier gets $100 at Christmas (It's actually illegal for a postal worker to accept that much, but this relative insists that "everybody does it").  This relative also tips, to the tune of $50 to hundreds, anyone who does any kind of service which involves coming to their home - landscapers, workers, heating/airconditioning service, home remodelers, carpet cleaner, anyone who comes to the home.  I hired a guy with a truck, who does odd jobs, to haul away some old fencing, and I am "cheap"  because I paid him exactly what we had negotiated, and not $50 MORE, as a tip.  It was his truck, he did the job alone, the money he charged me went in his pocket, it never occurred to me that a tip would be expected.

Am I wrong? Do people do this?   Because I cannot afford to tip the way this relative says you are supposed to tip.   (Neither of us is wealthy). 

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(edited)

It is important to tip those in service.  No need to go overboard.  Minimun 15 %.  I always do 20%

8 minutes ago, backformore said:

I have a family member who tips way more people than I think you're supposed to.  The mail carrier gets $100 at Christmas (It's actually illegal for a postal worker to accept that much, but this relative insists that "everybody does it").  This relative also tips, to the tune of $50 to hundreds, anyone who does any kind of service which involves coming to their home - landscapers, workers, heating/airconditioning service, home remodelers, carpet cleaner, anyone who comes to the home. 

No to these!  They charge for their services, these jobs are not considered in the service industry.  

 

8 minutes ago, backformore said:

I hired a guy with a truck, who does odd jobs, to haul away some old fencing, and I am "cheap"  because I paid him exactly what we had negotiated, and not $50 MORE, as a tip.  It was his truck, he did the job alone, the money he charged me went in his pocket, it never occurred to me that a tip would be expected.

No!. You do not tip an entrepreneur. 

It is as gauche to over tip as it is to under tip. 

Edited by wings707
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1 hour ago, janie jones said:

I'd never heard of people tipping the mail carrier until I was in my mid-twenties.  "Everyone" doesn't do it.  I doubt even most people do it.

Forty-some years ago, I remember my folks would give our mail carrier a Christmas card every year with $5, but we had the same guy for years on our route back then.

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(edited)

I always tip the letter carrier once a year.  Same with the woman who delivers my newspaper and the guy I hired to mow my lawn because I no longer wanted to bother storing a lawnmower. 

A few years back, I decided I just wasn't in the mood to scrape, sand, and paint my exterior woodwork, so I outsourced that.  Although I was paying them (the two brothers who own the company and do most of the work themselves unless it's a huge job) quite fairly for the job, it wound up being rather miserably hot and humid when it came time for them to do the work.  Working outside in those conditions, and maintaining their dedication to doing everything right -- they deserved a bonus, for sure.  I treated them to beer and pizza the afternoon they finished, and gave them each $100. 

I don't outsource much work like that, so my experience is limited, but there was one other time where the circumstances led me to tip (this time $50 to the person doing some plaster work for me). 

I tip anyone providing a service where "well, you can earn tips" is used as justification for their pitifully low wages.  Twenty percent is my norm; I can go up or down for particularly good or bad service (but it has to be really bad for me to give less than 15 percent).  For independent contractors, typically no, but as I mentioned, I have given something extra when they've gone above and beyond.

Edited by Bastet
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