Sweet Fellowship: Duggars and Friends (aka the Bates Family and Other Featured Families Thread)

[crazy8s]

6 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I know they have a strict division of labor between the genders, but wouldn't building bunk beds and fixing lights fall under Mark's jurisdiction?  Speaking as a woman who mows the lawn and does other yard work, fixes broken things in the house, and has to put everything together that my mom buys, I really have no clue about their division of labor.  

geez the guy owns the furniture store - could he not send a few guys to put bunk beds together?

[tabloidlover]

31 minutes ago, crazy8s said:

geez the guy owns the furniture store - could he not send a few guys to put bunk beds together?

He owns it?!

[crazy8s]

22 minutes ago, tabloidlover said:

He owns it?!

i was wrong - he is a salesman at Sams - but i swear their old posts made it seem he owned the place

Edited August 28, 2019 by crazy8s

[Girl in a Cardigan]

59 minutes ago, Natalie68 said:

If I were hugely pregnant with a list a mile long of things that needed to be done and his response was 1) call your mother and 2) eat this ice cream, the ice cream would be jammed really far up his nether regions.  She is going to completely lose her mind one day and the signs are clear as day you dumb fuck Mark!  

WOW! So even if she's "nesting" and "crazy," I would be SO PISSED if my husband's reaction was to tell me to call my mom (who appears to be on vacation or at least on a boat somewhere) instead of saying, "honey, how can I help?" And this is the man she's chosen to procreate with SEVEN times. Just wow....

[OpieTaylor]

1 hour ago, BitterApple said:

You and me both. Is life in the trenches at Sam's Furniture so arduous that Mark can't assemble a bunk bed or do a load of laundry on his off day? These women really settle for scraps, don't they?

Based on Sierra's Instagram posts/stories, Mark does take the kids out by himself sometimes, which I suppose gives Sierra opportunities to pursue personal interests, or just rest. Or maybe she feels like she has to clean when Mark and the kids are out; I hope not. She did recently show both her and Mark assembling a whole set of new bedroom furniture for their room. I haven't gotten the impression that he's a dick when he's been on camera in her videos, but who knows?

Sierra does tend to write really long posts, sharing lots of details, and she's always learning something profound from it all. Sometimes it seems like she's kind of "needy" (needing attention via social media), but I do find her mostly likable. IRL she might be a bit much though.

[libgirl2]

16 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

Nuri poor thing has a crooked mouth/stroke mouth. Add Nathan unattractive face=their offspring will be like Daddy David R. 

Jill probably went through the drive through and got her hubby a milkshake and fries. Maybe all the kids got to share 1 shake.

watch they will have gorgeous kids. I just hope they feed them. 

2 hours ago, Portia said:

Yeah, I think many of us have had that post-colonoscopy convo with a nurse.  I allegedly apologized to the same nurse four times in a row. 

I don't remember much from after mine. I was so too busy barfing. I felt sick right after I took that God awful prep at 3am and it took about 2 days for my stomach to feel normal again. 

When I had surgery a little over a month ago, I don't know what they gave me but it seems that I behaved myself and didn't say or do anything mortifying. 

My teeth I had out with novocaine but my son was knocked out. They kept him in back for awhile. When he got out he was surprisingly with it. 

Edited August 28, 2019 by libgirl2

[3 is enough]

Here's a thought:  Maybe Sierra should close down the baby factory.  She would have a much more manageable life that way.  

[Natalie68]

2 hours ago, OpieTaylor said:

Based on Sierra's Instagram posts/stories, Mark does take the kids out by himself sometimes, which I suppose gives Sierra opportunities to pursue personal interests, or just rest. Or maybe she feels like she has to clean when Mark and the kids are out; I hope not. She did recently show both her and Mark assembling a whole set of new bedroom furniture for their room. I haven't gotten the impression that he's a dick when he's been on camera in her videos, but who knows?

Sierra does tend to write really long posts, sharing lots of details, and she's always learning something profound from it all. Sometimes it seems like she's kind of "needy" (needing attention via social media), but I do find her mostly likable. IRL she might be a bit much though.

I don't think he is a dick necessarily, just not as helpful as someone should be when they have that many kids.  Sierra seems to shoulder the lions share of work in their household.  Between homeschooling, growing a baby, cooking/cleaning/yardwork/entertaining said kids/doing stuff to strawberries and oreos her hands are completely full.  He needs to step it up if his only suggestion is to call her mother for help and thinking an ice cream will help.  

[sondraK]

3 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

Here's a thought:  Maybe Sierra should close down the baby factory.  She would have a much more manageable life that way.  

Yes,I have a hard time feeling sorry for anyone who purposely chooses to have a lot of kids.Think about what you can handle,and space them accordingly,imo

[sondraK]

Wow,that Mark.I agree,what a guy! He threw off all the work to Sierra's parents.What's he going to do someday when they aren't around to help? Sierra seemed to think of them,not wanting to ruin their sunny Sunday on a boat.Mark couldn't have cared less

[Temperance]

Sierra and Mark appear to be Quiverfull and believe only in leaving it up to God. I actually think Mark works as many hours as possible to provide for the family. He then comes home to deal with his kids and wife. He may have legit reasons for not having time to do all the bonus chores. 

Mark did at least a dozen loads of laundry when Sierra and the kids were sick according to her Instagram post from last year. 

[skipnjump]

On 8/27/2019 at 5:45 PM, ginger90 said:

I have to ask, what's with the somewhat matching hats?  Are they to identify those who had their wisdom teeth out?

[Annabel11]

2 minutes ago, skipnjump said:

I have to ask, what's with the somewhat matching hats?  Are they to identify those who had their wisdom teeth out?

Full lipstick after oral surgery? Fascinating.

[questionfear]

17 hours ago, Natalie68 said:

I don't think he is a dick necessarily, just not as helpful as someone should be when they have that many kids.  Sierra seems to shoulder the lions share of work in their household.  Between homeschooling, growing a baby, cooking/cleaning/yardwork/entertaining said kids/doing stuff to strawberries and oreos her hands are completely full.  He needs to step it up if his only suggestion is to call her mother for help and thinking an ice cream will help.  

Its not clear from her post what his schedule is like too-it's possible he works weekends, and maybe this time of year with back to school and moving he's very busy? I'll give him the tiniest sliver, because if he's managing retail he probably works whacked out hours, but seriously, wtf is he doing/not doing when he's home? 

[3 is enough]

6 hours ago, Temperance said:

Sierra and Mark appear to be Quiverfull and believe only in leaving it up to God. I actually think Mark works as many hours as possible to provide for the family. He then comes home to deal with his kids and wife. He may have legit reasons for not having time to do all the bonus chores. 

Mark did at least a dozen loads of laundry when Sierra and the kids were sick according to her Instagram post from last year. 

He is supporting a wife and soon to be 7 kids. They appear to live in a fairly nice newer home.  Jobs in retail tend to fall on the lower end of the pay scale.  Maybe he also gets a commission for his sales, and he works longer hours to make as much as possible?  

Again, I don't see how these people can make ends meet.  Having a boatload of kids is expensive.  Bringing her the ice cream may have been the only gesture he could afford.

[Ohiopirate02]

6 minutes ago, 3 is enough said:

He is supporting a wife and soon to be 7 kids. They appear to live in a fairly nice newer home.  Jobs in retail tend to fall on the lower end of the pay scale.  Maybe he also gets a commission for his sales, and he works longer hours to make as much as possible?  

Again, I don't see how these people can make ends meet.  Having a boatload of kids is expensive.  Bringing her the ice cream may have been the only gesture he could afford.

I have a feeling that Sierra uses her Instagram as a tool for grifting like Jill Rodriguez.  She is not as brazen as Jill, but I get the feeling that she would not turn down any "love offerings."  

[Churchhoney]

22 hours ago, Girl in a Cardigan said:

WOW! So even if she's "nesting" and "crazy," I would be SO PISSED if my husband's reaction was to tell me to call my mom (who appears to be on vacation or at least on a boat somewhere) instead of saying, "honey, how can I help?" And this is the man she's chosen to procreate with SEVEN times. Just wow....

Yeah, and she's only 28. So think how many more times she's likely to procreate with this pretty unhelpful person......

He may be kind of weary of the amount of stuff they both have to do......I get that.....But Sierra talked wearily of it, too, back when (and just before?) she was first pregnant with this new one, as I recall............And yet they'll probably both keep going with creating more babeez until it's impossible for them to do so any more. 

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. 

Edited August 29, 2019 by Churchhoney

[Natalie68]

2 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

Yeah, and she's only 28. So think how many more times she's likely to procreate with this very unhelpful person....

This is the thing that bugs me.  A human being can only do so much.  From her posts, she reached her limit awhile ago.  Their lack of insight into themselves and how much they are capable of handling so no one loses their mind is startling.  So he has a lower paying job (maybe) and works a ton of hours so he can't help that much and she clearly is overwhelmed as any normal person would be.  Well Sierra/Mark, it is time to tie a knot in it.  Because the alternative is kids not getting all the attention/education they need, their mother losing her mind, their father not being able to help due to working a ton, barely making ends meet, etc.  Family help is nice but they are a young couple and their issues are of their own making.  It isn't like one was struck with a heinous disease so at some point family might get resentful.  You should not have more than you can handle.  I imagine they don't have a great health insurance policy so how on earth do they afford these births and related med expenses?  How about if one gets very sick?  Think long term people!

[BetyBee]

As the grandma in a similar scenario, my husband and I would be (and have been)  more than happy to drop everything and come help.  It sounds like the kids were delighted to have their grandparents there and it doesn't sound to me like Mark isn't doing his share.  Those two don't seem as strict on gender roles to me.  MMV of course, but to me, Sierra seems far more relatable than any Duggar.  

[Churchhoney]

And speaking of thinking long-term......Sierra's parents only have three kids. ....

Meanwhile, S and M will have six-plus-who-knows-how-many. And I'm pretty sure they'd follow the Duggar/Bates example of encouraging and even pressuring their own kids to have a lot of grandbabeez as well. 

So.....it's one thing to help out your adult kids with the grandbabeez when you have a reasonable number of kids, like three.

But how will S and M feel about this ask-the-grandparents-to-assist thing when three of their many many offspring are simultaneously pregnant with their kids -- say, numbers 4, 6, and 5 -- and all those offspring simultaneously call asking for help from Grandma Sierra and Grandpa Mark?...........And they've just returned from helping out another of their kids with its new kid, number, say, 5? 

I expect they'd say, "Shove it. Leave and cleave!" to their own kids if/when this kind of situation arose.............Which would be, you know, hella hypocritical......Or, if they aren't hypocrites and actually do help out when asked, they're going to be some of the most tired grandparents on the planet....

Neither outcome is a good one. But these people are seemingly incapable of drawing any actual logical inferences. 

[dargosmydaddy]

51 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

But how will S and M feel about this ask-the-grandparents-to-assist thing when three of their many many offspring are simultaneously pregnant with their kids -- say, numbers 4, 6, and 5 -- and all those offspring simultaneously call asking for help from Grandma Sierra and Grandpa Mark?...........And they've just returned from helping out another of their kids with its new kid, number, say, 5? 

Well, according to Sierra's recap of her and Mark's conversation, it will only be her daughters who call on her (or are allowed to call on her?) for help... maybe she can be glad she's daughter-light once she has grandkids (though I'm sure she's lamenting the lack of sister moms now).

[Temperance]

4 hours ago, Churchhoney said:

Yeah, and she's only 28. So think how many more times she's likely to procreate with this pretty unhelpful person......

He may be kind of weary of the amount of stuff they both have to do......I get that.....But Sierra talked wearily of it, too, back when (and just before?) she was first pregnant with this new one, as I recall............And yet they'll probably both keep going with creating more babeez until it's impossible for them to do so any more. 

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. 

She's 29 and soon to be 30. But the basic principle still holds. 

Quiverfull is insane.

[Jynnan tonnix]

8 hours ago, Churchhoney said:

And speaking of thinking long-term......Sierra's parents only have three kids. ....

Meanwhile, S and M will have six-plus-who-knows-how-many. And I'm pretty sure they'd follow the Duggar/Bates example of encouraging and even pressuring their own kids to have a lot of grandbabeez as well. 

So.....it's one thing to help out your adult kids with the grandbabeez when you have a reasonable number of kids, like three.

But how will S and M feel about this ask-the-grandparents-to-assist thing when three of their many many offspring are simultaneously pregnant with their kids -- say, numbers 4, 6, and 5 -- and all those offspring simultaneously call asking for help from Grandma Sierra and Grandpa Mark?...........And they've just returned from helping out another of their kids with its new kid, number, say, 5? 

I expect they'd say, "Shove it. Leave and cleave!" to their own kids if/when this kind of situation arose.............Which would be, you know, hella hypocritical......Or, if they aren't hypocrites and actually do help out when asked, they're going to be some of the most tired grandparents on the planet....

Neither outcome is a good one. But these people are seemingly incapable of drawing any actual logical inferences. 

I was an only child. My parents, who lived fairly close to us, (and even with us for a year or so while their new house, even closer, was under construction) were thrilled to death when they became grandparents, and helped us out all the time, from a couple of hours during the day to overnight stints, and even a few days at a clip now and again during the first three years. Our first two kids are 22 months apart. Of course, Mr Jyn being in the Navy meant that this cozy arrangement came to an end soon enough, but even so, once we came back to the same neck of the woods a few years later with three kids, offers to watch them became few and far between. Three kids at a clip was way outside of their comfort zone even though they were still both in very good shape and health back then. Which was, of course, fair enough...three kids under seven is a handful any way you slice it.

So I totally get where Sierra's parents, much as they may be willing and able to help out as much as is practicable, could very understandably find the need to draw the line at least to some sort of extent when faced with the prospect of watching six or seven for even the shortest of times.

[Sew Sumi]

Alyssa Bates Webster updates her condition.

[BitterApple]

Poor Alyssa. That's scary to have heart issues at such a young age. Hopefully she and John decide the baby factory is closed. 

[Sew Sumi]

Maybe @doodlebug knows something about post-op care. Will she need to be on meds? If so, I think that would be it for the baby factory. 

[galaxychaser]

Baby factory will not close. If mother dies it’s all for Jesus. Isn’t she already sick and got pregnant again anyway?

[Sew Sumi]

We don't know when she was diagnosed with this, but you have to take strong meds that aren't advisable in pregnancy (birth defects, fetal demise). I think she was diagnosed after the last one was born.

[libgirl2]

54 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Poor Alyssa. That's scary to have heart issues at such a young age. Hopefully she and John decide the baby factory is closed. 

They won't. 

[Absolom]

How many kids do John's siblings have?  I don't think his siblings are very quiverful.  The largest family may be three or four offspring.

[Sew Sumi]

6 minutes ago, Absolom said:

How many kids do John's siblings have?  I don't think his siblings are very quiverful.  The largest family may be three or four offspring.

I think you're right. 

[crazy8s]

does anyone here know anything about the andregg family? they were "looking forward to" jed duggars discipleship forum. there are photos on the conference site.

wiki fandom has that this family appeared on 16 kids and counting. they have 6 kids. 5 girls and a boy. one girl born in 1999 and one in 2001. the live in arkansas

Edited August 30, 2019 by crazy8s

[madpsych78]

38 minutes ago, crazy8s said:

does anyone here know anything about the andregg family? they were looking forward the jed duggars discipleship forum. there are photos on the conference site.

wiki fandom has that this family appeared on 16 kids and counting. they have 6 kids. 5 girls and a boy. one girl born in 1999 and one in 2001. the live in arkansas

I would be very surprised if there isn't a courtship between an Andregg daughter and a Duggar son since they are all about the same age and just entering that season of life, AND both families are in Arkansas.

I'm calling it now. Jedidiah with either Ashlynn or Lauren (the girls born in 1999 and 2001). 

Edited August 30, 2019 by madpsych78

[JoanArc]

 So Alyssa has SVT? SVT isn’t that uncommon and is usually fixable, so while this is serious, it’s not that life altering as long as they get under control. I once had a coworker who had 19 AV nodes in her heart.  For reference, you should only have one. After several ablation surgeries she was fine.  I’ve had numerous peds patients with it who have gone on to live normal lives as well. That said it still scary disease. I hope she recovers well.

Edited August 30, 2019 by JoanArc

[sondraK]

I was on Lanoxin during pregnancy for SVT,and was fine.It didn't affect my son.He came out 8 lb 3 oz,screaming and healthy

[Temperance]

2 hours ago, madpsych78 said:

I would be very surprised if there isn't a courtship between an Andregg daughter and a Duggar son since they are all about the same age and just entering that season of life, AND both families are in Arkansas.

I'm calling it now. Jedidiah with either Ashlynn or Lauren (the girls born in 1999 and 2001). 

According to FJ, Lauren Andregg is in a courtship with someone. It's in their unmarried fundie thread (third page).  

Edited August 31, 2019 by Temperance

[Churchhoney]

22 minutes ago, Temperance said:

According to FJ, Lauren Andregg is in a courtship with someone. It's in their unmarried fundie thread (third page).  

There are wedding dresses on her Pinterest. 

[GeeGolly]

I believe Carlin's been married around three months. Surprised there hasn't been a pregnancy announcement by now.

[Sew Sumi]

I think BUB comes back sometime this month. I expect an announcement to coincide with an episode, if not the season premiere.

[Temperance]

I'm expecting the first big announcement to be Trace's girlfriend/courtship/engagement.  

It's possible that Carlin isn't having a honeymoon baby and it's either too early to announce or she has nothing to announce.  

[Lunera]

Katie's boyfriend is attending a Baptist college in New Jersey. I'm assuming his parents won't allow a marriage for at least 4 years since he'll be the one providing. I know Katie is waiting to ditch school as soon as she's engaged. 

[Sew Sumi]

Katie will be done next spring. She's in the cosmetology program 

No way Gil lets Katie marry a kid who's living in the dorms! 

[galaxychaser]

Jill and 3 girls went out to eat! Yay 1 meal a month club! 

And still shelling Plexus. 

[PikaScrewChu]

21 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

Katie will be done next spring. She's in the cosmetology program 

No way Gil lets Katie marry a kid who's living in the dorms! 

Kelly probably will push hard anyway. Gotta get them married off before they know their own mind and all that. 

Trace/Chaney might distract Kelly from wanting to plan another wedding though. As an aside my autocorrect wanted to call her "Cheney". Very unfortunate. 

[GeeGolly]

I actually think Kelly has had a change of heart regarding Gothard's thoughts on education and marriage. 

Erin, Tori, Carlin and Josie all have college degrees. Tori and Carlin both had long engagements and Josie had to wait a year plus, to even date her now husband.

Although I doubt Katie will want to wait 4 years to marry.

[floridamom]

We just had to switch our TV to Xfinity/Comcast and don't get the UP Network. Do any of you know another way I can access the new episodes? Thanks for the info. I"m totally annoyed at cable TV here in Central Florida!

[GeeGolly]

1 minute ago, floridamom said:

We just had to switch our TV to Xfinity/Comcast and don't get the UP Network. Do any of you know another way I can access the new episodes? Thanks for the info. I"m totally annoyed at cable TV here in Central Florida!

We get UP on Xfinity here in New England. Does Youtube carry the episodes? 

[floridamom]

I looked over all the packages offered now on Xfinity and UP is not on any of them. If you have an existing package prior to May 2019 the channel line ups are/were better and those customers may continue with them. The new lineups are awful Good stations scattered throughout many packages which, of course, cost more. Had to chance; no choice as Spectrum just priced itself out with us; raising prices every few months. I lost a lot of shows I enjoyed.  BUT....I can still watch the infamour Duggar family on TLC. 

[PikaScrewChu]

8 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

I actually think Kelly has had a change of heart regarding Gothard's thoughts on education and marriage. 

Erin, Tori, Carlin and Josie all have college degrees. Tori and Carlin both had long engagements and Josie had to wait a year plus, to even date her now husband.

Although I doubt Katie will want to wait 4 years to marry.

The daughters working/getting degrees seems like it was more out of necessity at first since you couldn't expect Lawson and his lawn business to pay for the entire family. There also seemed to be aspects of favoritism at play with Erin though and it would have looked terrible (once they got the TeeVee show) if Erin was the only daughter to pursue a post secondary education if the younger ones wanted to as well. 

That being said Carlin was different and got a long engagement. The rest? Ehhh... Although for all we know that could be optics to be like "See! We don't force our kids to rush into marriage! They choose to do so!" 

I've thought about this quite a bit how much is manipulated for the public in regards to the Duggars and Bateses. How much have they actually changed? How much is actually to play up to the public they have changed so that people will continue to follow the Brand? I don't think the Bateses have too much to worry with Bringing Up Bates being on UP! The Duggars and TLC may be a different story. How many iterations does TLC have of 90 Day Fiance??? I'm currently staying with family and I've gotten sucked into that vortex. 

[Jeeves]

On 9/2/2019 at 3:12 AM, GeeGolly said:

I actually think Kelly has had a change of heart regarding Gothard's thoughts on education and marriage. 

I don't think it matters what Kelly thinks. Gil is the headship. What the kids do is up to him, not Kelly. Gil is very prominent in IBLP (he was on the Board of Directors, maybe still is?) which is Bill Gothard's creation. Maybe Gil's current view is that you need to homeschool your kids through high school and let them learn some useful skill/occupation at a "college" level after that. 

What they reveal publicly for cable TV mass consumption is certainly a scrubbed-up watered-down version of their lives and beliefs. Their older daughters seem to have moved past Bill Gothard's 1980's fashion frumpery dictates, which is of course just literally window dressing that signifies nothing significant about their beliefs.