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Sweet Fellowship: Duggars and Friends (aka the Bates Family and Other Featured Families Thread)


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34 minutes ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

Just in time for a one up of Jessa.  But Erin’s message so much more substantive.

Like night and day. But Erin, lots of husbands do laundry and dishes without complaint.

Edited by DangerousMinds
  • Love 9
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I find it extreme!y kind of sad that Erin's never met so done as gentle and loving as Chad.

I know she's speaking of romantic love but still, you don't know one other person as gentle and loving as Chad?  Not even your own family?  Sad.

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5 hours ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

Just in time for a one up of Jessa.  But Erin’s message so much more substantive.

Well, Jessa could hardly post "I love Ben because Ben loves me!  Happy Anniversary, Ben!"

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14 hours ago, Gweilo said:

I'm really sad at the notion that a husband who does housework is super rare.

Hey, in Duggarland/Gothardville it's not only rare for a male to do housework, it's rare for a male to have a paying full-time job. Males in Duggarland/Gothardville are apparently intended to be mainly decorative. .... And they're not that either. 

Edited by Churchhoney
  • Love 15
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Erin is a notorious social media show-off, but in her world it probably isn't unusual to have a husband who won't help with basic household tasks. I can't see Josh, TFDW or Austin pitching in to fold laundry or clean up the kitchen after dinner. 

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1 hour ago, BitterApple said:

Erin is a notorious social media show-off, but in her world it probably isn't unusual to have a husband who won't help with basic household tasks. I can't see Josh, TFDW or Austin pitching in to fold laundry or clean up the kitchen after dinner. 

Austin might, he seems like the type of person who wants things done right even if he has to do them himself.

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2 hours ago, BitterApple said:

Erin is a notorious social media show-off, but in her world it probably isn't unusual to have a husband who won't help with basic household tasks. I can't see Josh, TFDW or Austin pitching in to fold laundry or clean up the kitchen after dinner. 

TFDW would lose his shit if things weren’t folded right.  He’d fold his own tidy whities to make sure they fit properly in the drawer.

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23 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

Like night and day. But Erin, lots of husbands do laundry and dishes without complaint.

Years ago my dad made the comment to me, "if you expect a man to cook for you, you will never get married."  Guess he jinxed me because all these years later I've never been married.  Of course, when I was a kid, my mom did all the grocery shopping, housework, laundry, cooked all the meals and worked 40 hours a week.   After she started working, he did have to do the yard work because she didn't have time for that, but that was it.  

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12 minutes ago, floridamom said:

Isn't the yard work the 'man's ' job? I take my hat off to your mother, Lisa418722...your mom's something else...Wow, I couldn't do all that today myself. What did your dad do?

@floridamom  Thank you.  She IS something else and I'm very blessed to have her as my mom.  She did the yard work until she starting working outside the home. My dad wouldn't even grill out because "cooking was a woman's job." 

I know I've made it sound like my dad didn't do much, but he did work hard for the family in a factory job - sometimes 12 hours a day 6 days a week.  I think that's why my mom felt she had to do so much because my dad did work so many hours. He was able to do most car maintenance, he built the kitchen cabinets and put a shower in the bathroom and replaced all the windows in the house when I was growing up.  I think for him he enjoyed doing the major projects rather than the day-to-day life. Also, both of my parents grew up in families where women did all the work around the house and men made the money.

 One thing she said she would have done differently was if he didn't work on a Saturday, he would go fishing to have some alone time.  She said if she could re-do it she would have made him spend time with me because he didn't spend that much time with me while I was growing up. Then after I was grown, he was ready to be a more hands-on father and I had never really had much of a relationship with him.  When I bought my condo, my dad kept telling me I needed to buy a house instead. I couldn't get him to understand I didn't have time to work, keep up with the housework and take care of a yard.   He was a good guy most of the time and I do miss him even if we had absolutely nothing in common (he passed away in 2011)   

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I can handle a man who doesn’t do dishes or laundry if he’s like, doing yard work or maintainence on the house or something. I just can’t handle a man who sits on his ass drinking beer while his wife does all the housework.

For example, I have never ever mown a lawn. In my life. I am happy to do 95% of the dishes and laundry of it means I never have to. Ha! 

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1 hour ago, MamaMax said:

I can handle a man who doesn’t do dishes or laundry if he’s like, doing yard work or maintainence on the house or something. I just can’t handle a man who sits on his ass drinking beer while his wife does all the housework.

For example, I have never ever mown a lawn. In my life. I am happy to do 95% of the dishes and laundry of it means I never have to. Ha! 

And I'm just the opposite. Let me mow a lawn, fix something, home remodeling, but keep me away from cooking and laundry!

  • Love 8
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3 hours ago, Lisa418722 said:

@floridamom  Thank you.  She IS something else and I'm very blessed to have her as my mom.  She did the yard work until she starting working outside the home. My dad wouldn't even grill out because "cooking was a woman's job." 

I know I've made it sound like my dad didn't do much, but he did work hard for the family in a factory job - sometimes 12 hours a day 6 days a week.  I think that's why my mom felt she had to do so much because my dad did work so many hours. He was able to do most car maintenance, he built the kitchen cabinets and put a shower in the bathroom and replaced all the windows in the house when I was growing up.  I think for him he enjoyed doing the major projects rather than the day-to-day life. Also, both of my parents grew up in families where women did all the work around the house and men made the money.

 One thing she said she would have done differently was if he didn't work on a Saturday, he would go fishing to have some alone time.  She said if she could re-do it she would have made him spend time with me because he didn't spend that much time with me while I was growing up. Then after I was grown, he was ready to be a more hands-on father and I had never really had much of a relationship with him.  When I bought my condo, my dad kept telling me I needed to buy a house instead. I couldn't get him to understand I didn't have time to work, keep up with the housework and take care of a yard.   He was a good guy most of the time and I do miss him even if we had absolutely nothing in common (he passed away in 2011)   

Sounds like, between them, your parents did more work in a month than the entire Duggar clan does in about two years. (well, with the possible exception of Jana and JD)

  • Love 14
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1 minute ago, Churchhoney said:

Sounds like, between them, your parents did more work in a month than the entire Duggar clan does in about two years. (well, with the possible exception of Jana and JD)

Definitely, no question about it.  JB& M would have no idea how to work together to raise their family (even an only child like me) and do work themselves rather than grifting to have other people do it for them. We did go to church most Sunday mornings (not every time the door was open) and we never went on "mission-cations" when I was a kid. We went to visit my father's family in Northern KY (we lived in TN).  

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5 hours ago, Lisa418722 said:

@floridamom  Thank you.  She IS something else and I'm very blessed to have her as my mom.  She did the yard work until she starting working outside the home. My dad wouldn't even grill out because "cooking was a woman's job." 

I know I've made it sound like my dad didn't do much, but he did work hard for the family in a factory job - sometimes 12 hours a day 6 days a week.  I think that's why my mom felt she had to do so much because my dad did work so many hours. He was able to do most car maintenance, he built the kitchen cabinets and put a shower in the bathroom and replaced all the windows in the house when I was growing up.  I think for him he enjoyed doing the major projects rather than the day-to-day life. Also, both of my parents grew up in families where women did all the work around the house and men made the money.

 One thing she said she would have done differently was if he didn't work on a Saturday, he would go fishing to have some alone time.  She said if she could re-do it she would have made him spend time with me because he didn't spend that much time with me while I was growing up. Then after I was grown, he was ready to be a more hands-on father and I had never really had much of a relationship with him.  When I bought my condo, my dad kept telling me I needed to buy a house instead. I couldn't get him to understand I didn't have time to work, keep up with the housework and take care of a yard.   He was a good guy most of the time and I do miss him even if we had absolutely nothing in common (he passed away in 2011)   

Well, my hat is off to him too because I did that for summers to put myself through college (some weeks we only worked three 12 hour days but one week I worked six of them).  at the end of the day I often literally felt like my feet were bleeding, and I was a sprightly teen.

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Lisa418722: You are welcome. Your parents sound like very hard working people. I admire that. I'm sure that you were loved very much and all that work was their way of showing you that they are providing for you.

My father and mother are both passed on and it's now at almost 60 yrs old that I understand everything they were trying to teach me in life.

Getting back on track here, The Duggar parents are a complete waste on earth. (also something my mother would have said.) The only thing they have taught their children is fear...fear of everything and everyone that are not exactly like them.

  • Love 8
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5 hours ago, MamaMax said:

I can handle a man who doesn’t do dishes or laundry if he’s like, doing yard work or maintainence on the house or something. I just can’t handle a man who sits on his ass drinking beer while his wife does all the housework.

For example, I have never ever mown a lawn. In my life. I am happy to do 95% of the dishes and laundry of it means I never have to. Ha! 

Same here. Though I have mowed my share of lawns and done plenty more yard work over the years. My husband takes care of the heavy stuff, but I do most of the weeding and such. He is an excellent handyman, though.  Plus, I was a SAHM who never did go back to work after the kids were off on their own, and Mr. Jyn's job often entailed very long hours, to say nothing of the times he was deployed or otherwise traveling, so it seemed only fair that I do as much as I could on the home front.

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I admit I do not care for the Bates family at all, and I cannot picture Zach Bates being a decent law enforcement officer, but I bet it burns JB's biscuits that Zach being the oldest is more of success than Josh will ever be. In fact, it seems the Bates marriages and life outside the family seems to be working better than all the Duggars relationships.

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19 minutes ago, bigskygirl said:

I admit I do not care for the Bates family at all, and I cannot picture Zach Bates being a decent law enforcement officer, but I bet it burns JB's biscuits that Zach being the oldest is more of success than Josh will ever be. In fact, it seems the Bates marriages and life outside the family seems to be working better than all the Duggars relationships.

Do you really think JB wants his kids to be successful outside of his little world?  I don't think he looks at stuff like training for and getting an actual profession or being financially independent as being necessary or desirable for his kids.  I think he is just fine with them being dependent on him for their livelihoods for the rest of their lives.  His massive ego is fed by having his adult kids crave his approval over everything they do.  He likes being emperor in his little kingdom and he wants his subjects dependent on him.

Edited by doodlebug
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14 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

Do you really think JB wants his kids to be successful outside of his little world?  I don't think he looks at stuff like training for and getting an actual profession or being financially independent as being necessary or desirable for his kids.  I think he is just fine with them being dependent on him for their livelihoods for the rest of their lives.  His massive ego is fed by having his adult kids crave his approval over everything they do.  He likes being emperor in his little kingdom and he wants his subjects dependent on him.

JB only wants his children to get jobs that would benefit him. Yes, JD is a volunteer constable, but God forbid he should actually go into the law enforcement profession. I personally think JD is too shunted to be a full time officer. It would take a lot of hard work and dedication and *gasp* getting away from JB's control to work on a day to day basic while dealing with the worse the world has to offer and be completely able to handle it. They can pretend JD is hardworking like the one phony episode where JB went on a ride along with him and showing how hard he works in construction, but at the end he is working because daddy allows it. In otherwords, it makes daddy looks good, and he can get cheap labor. This is the one and only thing I can give the Bates family credit for. At least some of the children have spread their wings. Cannot say the same thing about any of the Duggar offspring.

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On 11/3/2017 at 8:10 PM, Lisa418722 said:

"if you expect a man to cook for you, you will never get married."  Guess he jinxed me because all these years later I've never been married. 

I don't expect a man to cook for me. I do expect him to bring me home some Cheese Sticks from Opie Taylor's.

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Although each new baby born into the family is doomed in its own way, I'm glad it's a girl.

The girls have a slim but possible chance of marrying a man who will care for them, feed them, and provide a roof over their head. The Rodrigues boys, on the other hand, have no skills and very little ability to provide for a family.

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I truly think that the near-starvation look of the Rodriguez kids is scary with regard to the stunting that they may have suffered. It would surprise me if most of them didn't suffer horrible protein deficiencies as little  -- and as bigger -- kids. That kind of thing can have lifelong effects. ... And when you put it on top of the psychological ill effects those poor things certainly have. It's horrifying. 

Edited by Churchhoney
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Jill and Chimpy worship the Pearls. That's all anyone needs to know about these people. They are amongst the worst of the worst. Even worse than the Duggars. 

They say that Timothy wants to go to Bible College. I guess they should be thankful that there are no real academic requirements for admission. I just wonder how they would pay for it. Those schools aren't passing out scholarships like candy. 

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4 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

Jill and Chimpy worship the Pearls. That's all anyone needs to know about these people. They are amongst the worst of the worst. Even worse than the Duggars. 

They say that Timothy wants to go to Bible College. I guess they should be thankful that there are no real academic requirements for admission. I just wonder how they would pay for it. Those schools aren't passing out scholarships like candy. 

I just read on FreeJinger the Pearls believe in family planning. Why doesn't Jill? (And yes, I know the Pearls are horrible people.)

Edited by Temperance
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4 hours ago, Gweilo said:

Although each new baby born into the family is doomed in its own way, I'm glad it's a girl.

The girls have a slim but possible chance of marrying a man who will care for them, feed them, and provide a roof over their head. The Rodrigues boys, on the other hand, have no skills and very little ability to provide for a family.

The fundy boys remind me of the lost boys in Mormon polygamist sects. No way to support a family.

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On 10/25/2017 at 10:02 PM, Sew Sumi said:

Oh, so I was almost right the first time. I just thought Melanie was pregnant with the 5th now. Like I said, I took an unintentional Maxwell break. There was nothing really going on with them that I hadn't read 50 times before. Came back to see they'd been to Colorado (again), little girls helping in the kitchen (again), workout humblebrags (fairly new for them, but yes, again). Anna Marie whelping (again). They're as boring as dry toast. 

Elissa is pregnant and due "in the first quarter of next year". 

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12 hours ago, Temperance said:

I just read on FreeJinger the Pearls believe in family planning. Why doesn't Jill? (And yes, I know the Pearls are horrible people.)

I think it works this way: The Pearls basically have their own little separate cult going. And the rest of these people are in their own groups -- Gothard, Quiverfull, etc. 

And I think Pearl has basically set his miniature cult up to act as a vendor of just one set of really bad ideas to individuals from other cults like JB and M and Jill R. And of course a money-making venture for Pearl, as a result of that.

Doesn't seem that anybody follows the Pearls in anything much besides male-privilege-taken-to-the-limit and, especially, child beating. Nobody really seems to care what the Pearls think about anything but those two things. It's probably the no-birth-control crowd that's most interested in buying the Pearl's "product" because it's the mobs of kids that are most likely to send them in search of plumbing line. 

Edited by Churchhoney
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I can't hardly wait to see the type of wedding that JillR will put together for Nurie.  Thrift store wedding dress?  Or a makeover of the wedding dress JillR used for her wedding renewal?  Will the sisters use those fuchsia dresses for bridesmaid dresses again?  Will the Duggers be invited?  Who will proved for the wedding feast?  Who will make the cake?  Do the makeup and hair?

Oh, I want to see this wedding in the worst way!

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15 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Jill and Chimpy worship the Pearls. That's all anyone needs to know about these people. They are amongst the worst of the worst. Even worse than the Duggars. 

 

A few weeks ago Jill outsourced her two oldest daughters to the Pearls and they looked happier with them . That should tell  you something .

 

18 minutes ago, Ocean Chick said:

I can't hardly wait to see the type of wedding that JillR will put together for Nurie.  Thrift store wedding dress?  Or a makeover of the wedding dress JillR used for her wedding renewal?  Will the sisters use those fuchsia dresses for bridesmaid dresses again?  Will the Duggers be invited?  Who will proved for the wedding feast?  Who will make the cake?  Do the makeup and hair?

Oh, I want to see this wedding in the worst way!

Jill is going to wear white , no way she'll let Nurie be the center of attention .

  • Love 14
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4 hours ago, Ocean Chick said:

I can't hardly wait to see the type of wedding that JillR will put together for Nurie.  Thrift store wedding dress?  Or a makeover of the wedding dress JillR used for her wedding renewal?  Will the sisters use those fuchsia dresses for bridesmaid dresses again?  Will the Duggers be invited?  Who will proved for the wedding feast?  Who will make the cake?  Do the makeup and hair?

Oh, I want to see this wedding in the worst way!

I think a lot of grifting will happen.  Maybe Taco4life will provide the feast?

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I no longer think there'll be a wedding in the very near future.  Jill has ignored the whole Nurie courting story lately.  I think she either jumped the gun on some poor fundy lad who merely said hello to Nurie when their family visited the Rod's, or if there was an interested party the scads of public interest and speculation about what it would be like to marry into that bunch sent him running.

Edited by Zahdii
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54 minutes ago, Zahdii said:

I no longer think there'll be a wedding in the very near future.  Jill has ignored the whole Nurie courting story lately.  I think she either jumped the gun on some poor fundy lad who merely said hello to Nurie when their family visited the Rod's, or if there was an interest party the scads of interest and speculation about what it would be like to marry into that bunch sent him running.

Which might mean he actually had a shred of brain going for him...Poor Nurie. Guess they might have to wait for a less cerebral fellow than that...

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1 hour ago, Zahdii said:

I no longer think there'll be a wedding in the very near future.  Jill has ignored the whole Nurie courting story lately.  I think she either jumped the gun on some poor fundy lad who merely said hello to Nurie when their family visited the Rod's, or if there was an interest party the scads of interest and speculation about what it would be like to marry into that bunch sent him running.

Or, JRod got tired of all of the attention on Nurie so she's stopped posting about it.

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4 hours ago, Zahdii said:

I no longer think there'll be a wedding in the very near future.  Jill has ignored the whole Nurie courting story lately.  I think she either jumped the gun on some poor fundy lad who merely said hello to Nurie when their family visited the Rod's, or if there was an interest party the scads of interest and speculation about what it would be like to marry into that bunch sent him running.

But he did more than just say hello! He gave her GUM!

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