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S06.E09: Child Star


Cranberry

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That was the worst singing, dancing, acting, and writing I've ever seen on this show.

 

If this episode isn't the new lowest rated episode for the series I will be surprised.

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Oy.  The acting.  Surely they could have found a child actor who didn't come across as an animatron reading off a cue card .  As for new new directions none of them, save Sammie, Becca and sometimes Billy, can act their way out of a paper bag.  I didn't really notice until this episode because they had so little to do before now.   Sammie is also the best singer by far.  Billy (Marshall) can also hold his his own when leading a tune but the rest, nope.   Still oy the acting.  Not an ounce of charisma among most of them.  The sad thing is I was looking forward to the Mason/Madison/Jane plot because at least it was something new for the show but the acting dragged it down.  As did the acting in the Spencer/Roderick/Alistair plot.

 

Sue's vendetta is beyond played out as are Sue/Will battling which is too bad because one of my wishes for this season was more Will.  I just didn't want it in this context.  

 

Finally that dang storage unit again?  Who thought Sue having a "hurt locker" should be a thing this season?  I mean i get that Fox probably said they wanted Sue to be heavily featured but surely there were better ways to do it than this.

Edited by camussie
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You know what? Since I hate all the main plots (and we had no Klaine or Samchel which have been so frustrating) I enjoyed it.

Was it a little pointless? Yeah, but it felt more like Glee is actually supposed to be about.

My only big gripe is that I hate that little brat and I want him gone, like, now. And I can't really tolerate Sue after the Hurt Locker stuff.

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This episode shows me that when you don't care about the characters or the repeating of the same, same old story-lines, you can actually get some enjoyment from a Glee episode.

 

The writing was weak, the acting tolerable, the performances acceptable but.....

 

This is the second episodes I have enjoyed since this season started. 

 

And it was a wasted episode in a limited season= STUPID

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I love Kitty being the voice of the viewer in regards to wondering if another alumnus was going to come in and take over the episode.

 

It was nice to have an episode actually focus on the newbies and let us hear their voices once again and not as just background to the alumni. 

 

I totally would have loved to have seen Kurt watch/interact w/ Myron Muskovitz.  He reminded me of a mini-Kurt, although Kurt was always somewhat more subdued.  

 

Myron's opening Destiny's Child number was just awesome.

 

Spencer's storyline was odd b/c all I could focus on was how much his crush looked like he was in his thirties, well that and I didn't see any chemistry b/t the two of them and he totally doesn't seem like Spencer's type, but then again we barely know the newbies so how would any of us know what his type is.  I loved that during Spencer's song of love for the crush he had popped his shirt off during push-ups...that was strange, but still nice to look at...as well as the gun show he was putting out there on display in the classroom.

 

I loved how Spencer was now able to motivate Roderick to now climb a rope...seriously?!  When he slipped and everyone rallied around to catch him...I started laughing b/c let's be honest, he would have taken out the entire glee club from that height.

 

Break Free was an awesome and it made me realize how great Lea Michele sounds singing pop songs like this, yet her album was crap.  We all know the girl can sing and does covers like nobody else...well second to Kelly Clarkson perhaps.

 

Cool Kids was a great closing number but all I could think of was Roderick need a larger shirt size to be wearing and that Alistair guy is built but needs to cut his hair.  Madison has a beautiful voice and I want to hear her more solo-wise.

 

I guess Spencer and Alistair are the new Kurt and Blaine...ugh.

 

So we are up to what...8 member now on the glee club...will the band fill up the rest of the numbers?

 

promo for next week...well I guess now we know how we get Blaine back to McKinley full time...double ugh...so now that means New Directions will have four coaches plus whatever alumni stops by that week.  Since we are getting Carol Burnett back for an episode I hope Sue tells her off for missing Jean's funeral.  I also can't believe we are also getting a Michael Bolton appearance after all the name dropping.

Edited by CMH1981
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I may be the cheese that stands alone, but I actually didn't mind this.

 

I found myself enjoying most of the songs, plus I actually kind of like the new newbies.  I honestly liked them better than yet another Klaine or Samchel crapfest.  Or TPTB trying to come up with another reason for the alumni to be hanging around McKinley.

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I actually find the newbies likable and normally would find them interesting, but why are we spending time on characters no one cares about with only 3 more episodes to go? All of the performances were crap, all of them, with the exception of Rachel's one line in Break Free. With that being said, as long as

Rachel ends this show on Broadway with Jesse IDAF what happens between now and the finale.

 

It's kind of sad Sam/Mercedes were ruined to service Sam/Rachel when clearly the pairing is an afterthought.

 

ETA:

 

 

Break Free was an awesome and it made me realize how great Lea Michele sounds singing pop songs like this, yet her album was crap.

 

That's what I'm saying! She should have made her album as pop as possible, not that wannabe Celine Dion/adult contemporary mess she had going on.

Edited by Danielle87
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yeah this was the "let's give the new kids an episode before it's over"

 

but all I could think of during the whole thing was: where are the gay couples when you need them (and I'm saying that as an out and proud man with a partner of going on15 years)?

 

that little twit Byron would've shit his pants after 2 seconds against Lima Heights Santana (although I will say that kid they cast does have talent, but i would've cast him as Kurt and Blaines future son. C'mon I can't be the only one who thinks that)

 

Spencer (and yeah he's real pretty to look at) got the best part of the show for me. But this could have been an opportunity for him to have a bonding moment with Kurt if he was there. Kurt would've told him far earlier to just be himself  with Alister

Edited by madhacker
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I find the newbies likable too because they are new concepts for characters versus retreads.  Beyond that I still say Roderick is the most realistic underdog ever in ND.  That is why I was disappointed the acting was so flat. It dragged down what otherwise could have been pleasant enough stories.  

Edited by camussie
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I liked that there was more singing this time, that's why I watch.  I didn't really get why Spencer suddenly wanted Roderick (?) to climb a rope.  Why does he care?  And then to force him to do it when they're in the middle of a show and time's awasting, but let's take the time for the unfit guy to climb the rope and save the day.  Silly.  And the long-haired crush really did look too old to be in high school.  Maybe he was left back a few times...like 5 or 6 times.

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I could tell pretty early on Roderick wasn't going to be an amazing actor. He also doesn't have a very good screen prescene, and he just looks awkward in numbers. Not a cute awkward, like Cory did, but just highly uncomfortable.

But everyone else is passable enough to me.

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I totally would have loved to have seen Kurt watch/interact w/ Myron Muskovitz.  He reminded me of a mini-Kurt, although Kurt was always somewhat more subdued.

There is nothing even remotely resembling mini or whatever Kurt in this kid, except the high pitched voice. He was like old skool Rachel but cranked up x 1,000.

 

 

I loved how Spencer was now able to motivate Roderick to now climb a rope...seriously?!  When he slipped and everyone rallied around to catch him...I started laughing b/c let's be honest, he would have taken out the entire glee club from that height.

I didn't get how Spencer motivated Roderick except repeating he got his back. This was repeated again afterwards. They can repeat it dozen times but until they show how he exactly Spencer had anything to do with it,  I'm sorry. Big Rod motivated himself - this I actually saw happen. 

Edited by fakeempress
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I thought Skylar Astin made for an unbelievable high schooler. Until I saw Spencer's hippie crush in this episode.

 

Do they even bother running each new hire past casting directors anymore? Or do they just troll whomever's staffing the Auntie Anne's in Pasadena that day?

 

I'd feel bad about this, but: Myron was a wretched little actor, singer and dancer. Normally I'd avoid saying that about kids, but I'm pretty sure he was a Performing Robot created in a plant in China.

Also, let's be real, kids: None of you can dance worth a damn. Go to competition for the experience, sure, but these kids would be lucky to win bus fare, much less place in anything.

Edited by jmonique
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Noah (Roderick) is a bad actor and has little presence but i think Marshall (Spencer) is even worse. Although there is also Laura (Madison) contending for the title.  Billy (Mason) is a better than those three but still no great shakes.  I would say passable.  Sammie (Jane) is the best of the bunch and someone I wish we got to see more of this season.

Edited by camussie
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I think the actor who plays Roderick is called Noah, and yeah, he's pretty flat in his acting with no presence. 

I agree Samantha is the best singer, but as an actress I wouldn't say she's really good. 

I'd group the newbies into group A: Samantha and Billy (plays the twin cheerio)

Group B: the girl who plays the cheerio twin Madison

Group C: Spencer, Roderick, Alistair (don't remember all the actors's names so going with the characters here)

 

Group Z: the Bar-Mitzvah brat, I think the character's name was Myron, not Byron 

Edited by fakeempress
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If this was an earlier episode I might have been ok with it  and let it slide but with only few episodes left it seems so out of place and unnecessary.  Again they set up Rachel to maybe do something with the club and than nothing why wasn't she inserted into trying help one of the problems the kids were having? 

 

The acting and the performances were all very flat.  Despite Kitty/Becca's valiant effort to try to make the song at the enjoyable it had none of the fun  bonding like qualities it should.

 

Sue's vendetta against Will and the glee club just makes no sense unless next week we hear she has a brain tumor  or some other medical condition. 

Edited by tom87
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Sounds like I made the right choice to skip the live airing in favor of going out for dinner and drinks with my coworkers. The wine was fantastic. But then, take out from KFC sounds like it would have been preferable to watching this dreck.

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That was the dumb part.  Rachel recognized that she hadn't been a very good coach because she didn't really know the kids; however, they didn't follow through on it.  Instead she walked into the choir room, said they should figure out what they wanted to sing, and then left them completely to their own devices instead of collaborating with them to turn those selections into workable performances.  Then at the end they had Will saying he was proud of her for being so intelligent. I mean it was a nice moment and all but I didn't quite understand where it came from.  

Edited by camussie
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That was the dumb part.  Rachel recognized that she hadn't been a very good coach and they didn't follow through on it beyond her saying you kids figure it and then not doing any coaching at all.  Then at the end they had Will saying he was proud of her for being so intelligent. I mean it was a nice moment and all but I didn't quite understand where it came from.  

Of the different things Rachel has needed to work on her "intelligence " wasn't something she was lacking as a young teen when Shue met her.  If he would have said she was a more  understanding person now or something maybe . 

 

She could have talk with Madison since she too has some obsessive behaviors or something.  

 

Anyway a precocious kid is not what glee needed I hope he is background or reeled in real quick for the next 4 episodes.

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This kid joining ND is the weirdest thing, and the show's done lots of weird things. I wanted to kick the little brat out of the auditorium the moment he started screaming at his dancers. If at least the actor was any good  - but he's a kid himself who can't act. And if they wanted me to believe his character would be trying to grope Kitty, maybe he shouldn't have come across as a flaming queen, sorry to use this expression but can't think of an euphemism right now. 

 

As was said, the lack of investment takes away the strain of watching but adds other strains. Some of the music numbers went too long, like the kid's Destiny Child's song - why did it have to go on and on, and the other actors to keep making the same O-O faces, idk. Some of the numbers at the Bar-Mitzvah sounded like karaoke, and only Rachel and Jane sounded any good. 

 

I like the newbies in that they don't feel like carbon copies or retreads of the older characters, and there is something new for the show in the twins relationship. But with so little time left, they either should've developed them more already, or involve Rachel more in this episode. Their stories here were all set up and resolved easy-peasy within the episode, and the writing was at times really atrocious - declarative of the worst kind, which wasn't helped by the modest acting skills of the newbies. 

 

 

That was the dumb part.  Rachel recognized that she hadn't been a very good coach and they didn't follow through on it beyond her saying you kids figure it out and stepping back completely.  Then at the end they had Will saying he was proud of her for being so intelligent. I mean it was a nice moment and all but I didn't quite understand where it came from.

Agreed. The same thing happened in the Spencer-Roderick story in that what was said should've been shown. Rachel should'e been more involved with the GC kids before Will declared that at the end - indeed, a nice moment but unearned as you suggest.

 

BTW I saw the guy playing Spencer's crush is actually 17...although he does not look it.

For real? He's got a case of Margot Robbie there.

Edited by fakeempress
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Best parts of tonight's episode for me:

1) No Klaine

2) Very little Samchele (they just seemed like friends rather than much else.)

3) I liked the scenes with Madison, Mason, & Jane.

4) I liked Mason's solo. He certainly did a better job of singing Queen than Blaine. ( My ears still hurt from that past horror.)

5) Sue having to be Myron's "slave." The two deserve each other.

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Myron is 13, he's only a year away from typical high school freshman age.  He just seems younger because he's a huge brat.  

Well when the other high school characters are played by adults in their 20's it made it even more ridiculous.

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So... I watched the ep. I feel like I'm being punished for something I did in a past life.

 

Myron is so obnoxious that I would happily drown him in a well myself. Sick of the Sue/Will rivalry for the millionth time. Tired of someone having to massage Rachel's ego when she's done little (if anything) to really earn it. Missed seeing Kurt but was glad that he was far away from this mess. Don't care about the kid's romantic relationships.

 

Smart going, RIB... you've got a short season so why not throw in a pointless filler ep.

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Can someone explain the wtf reactions? I mean, this wasn't great, but no one was hypnotized into kissing anyone, nor was anyone locked in an elevator with a jigsue. Aside from that awful child, it was at least where it normally is, without all the ships I hate.

Or...have I just been brainwashed?

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I have no idea what show I just watched, but the title card said it was Glee. Huh.

 

But you know what? I'm feeling generous. Things I liked:

 

1. No Kurt and no Blaine.

2. Mason is adorable, especially his smile

3. Spencer has a nice body and I'm shallow

4. Jane doesn't annoy me like she did in the first episode she was introduced in.

5. Lea Michele's reaction shots.

 

Okay, flash of generosity over. Glee is the original cast. Not this bunch. I don't give a fuck about the magic of the choir room.

Edited by CleoCaesar
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Can someone explain the wtf reactions?

 

 

Agreed the stories weren't near as nonsensical as a lot of this season nor was there a meta overload.  So plus on that.  My only WTF was the acting.  It was so so flat throughout the episode.  

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I've pretty much checked Glee off of my competent writing list ages ago.

I mainly enjoyed this episode because it was giving the new kids exposure and didn't focus on the old cast taking extensive visits to a school they graduated from.

 

I felt once Spencer joined the Glee club a lot of the more interesting aspects of his personality just seemed to disappear so it was a relief to see them back in full force here. I didn't really dig his crush on Alistair because it felt like they were just shoehorning it in to:

1. Have another gay pairing since Klaine has come full circle

2. Get another member for the Glee club

3. Everybody has to be shipped in this show

 

Still it surprised me that he and Myron became members by the end of the episode. That honestly caught me off guard and was an original way to get some new members from unexpected places.

 

I didn't really like the fat shamming/exercise plot with Roderick. To me Roderick is pretty good looking and doesn't seem like the body type that an episode needs to focus on it. Once again I felt the show was just shoehorning in their "lesson" into the episode instead of trying to integrate some more original traits specific to the actual character.

 

I'm also glad Mason finally broke the Wonder Twin duo up by actually getting a personality this episode.

 

Despite it's flaws I liked the episode because we finally go away from all the awkward "Alumni's Hanging Around" plots and gave some much needed characterization to the newer characters. Not great in the spectrum of all other TV show but for Glee's current standards this was above average (keep in mind Glee has set this bar very low). 

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This episode was pretty stupid and pointless, but whatever, what could we really expect from this show by now.

 

I really like Mason's voice and thought he did a good job on the Queen cover, which isn't an easy feat as Darren has proved previously. Lea's part of "Break Free" was great but the rest of that song was a mess.  

 

Did the writers realize they could get the word "dick" past the censors or something? They totally overused it. 

 

 

Spencer's crush looks like Stoner Brett's brother.

 

I got more of a Rick the Stick vibe from him. 

 

I could tell pretty early on Roderick wasn't going to be an amazing actor. He also doesn't have a very good screen prescene, and he just looks awkward in numbers. Not a cute awkward, like Cory did, but just highly uncomfortable.
 

 

The kid who plays Roderick, Noah Guthrie, was a youtube "star", I believe. Well one of his covers was pretty popular pre-Glee at least. I don't think he has any acting experience and it really shows. Considering he and the guy who plays Spencer are the two weakest links in the cast in terms of acting it probably wasn't a very good idea to pair them in a story together. All of their scenes together were awful and borderline painful to watch. 

 

I like the New Kids, so I liked the episode. I kinda like their awkwardness. That final performance (Cool Kids) was quite charming. 

 

Yeah I actually liked the final group performance too. I had come to hate closing group numbers because they over did them in season 4/5 with the original newbies and none of those performances ever really stood out to me, but "Cool Kids" was actually kind of cute in a clumsy way so I didn't mind it. 

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See I guess I didn't see where it gave any of them  much development.  I guess Mason the most but we already knew Spencer was a bit of dick but not really and Roderick was insecure about his weight.   I didn't buy that one second Spencer is calling him out and Roderick hates it  but the next time he pushes him Spencer has his back.   ???

 

It was just to setup problem, talk,  problem fixed.   And at this stage of the game I kept asking myself why they bothered.

Edited by tom87
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It wasn't the worst 40-something minutes of scripted tv ever to air in the history of television, but it ranks right up there in terms of pointlessness. Glee was given 13 episodes to wrap up the series after tanking it in a pretty spectacular fashion, and this is what they choose to do with one of the very limited eps they were afforded?

Because it was so well plotted, scripted and performed it might revive the whole shebang and Fox will uncancel the show and renew it for two more seasons?

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The show has been on the air 6 fucking seasons. How the hell do you give focus to new characters 3/4 episodes before it disappears, seriously.

It's filler when you have this little time left? No Kevin, no Mercedes, little Rachel, What the fuck?

The Noobs are OK but none of them are either exceptional actors and some stink to high heaven.

Why the fuck are we spending time on an obnoxious kid this late in the game?

I realize why, but WTF No Santana???

More white boy heroes... WTF?

Fat shaming this late in the game WTF?

Who gives a crap that post Glee new Gay hooks up with a 30 something hipster... wTF..

Give me 4 Rachel solos, a Mercedes Solo and An Artie/Kurt solo in an episode and I would shut up but these shitty show runners want to concentatrate on Noobs NOW?? Did the disaster of Season 4 not resonate??

What the Fuck...

I feel better now.

Edited by caracas1914
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In the crazy world of Glee, a 13 year old in the glee club is practically the most normal thing they've ever done.  Some high schools are grades 7-12 and some 9th graders are 13 (I started high school at 13 because my birthday is in December and my school district had everyone born in the same calendar year start at the same time)

 

I didn't hate this episode.  It also had the smallest number of originals.  Which makes me think there's a correlation there.  Honestly, if they just wrote out everyone except the new glee club members and McKinley faculty 2 years ago I don't think that would have been so bad.   And they managed to tone down the meta to a dull roar.

 

There's an irony that all the kids who look like high schoolers are in their 20s while the new guy who looks 30 is really 17.

Edited by futurechemist
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It's not the old characters that's the problem, it's the fucking shitty writing. The correlation is they haven't had the time to run the new boring characters off the tracks yet, but because they are new and boring, there isn't any history, chemistry or context.

Roderick never acted before Glee and it painfully shows.

New gay Spencer is every gay character with no shading other than football jock.

Edited by caracas1914
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It's not the old characters that's the problem, it's the fucking shitty writing. The correlation is they haven't had the time to run the new boring characters off the tracks yet, but because they are new and boring, there isn't any history, chemistry or context.

Roderick never acted before Glee and it painfully shows.

New gay Spencer is every gay character with no shading other than football jock.

Wrt to the writing, why am I not surprised there's no hint that new gay Spencer joining the GC has made any difference in how he's treated by the rest of the school - which he made into a huge deal when Sam gave him the Finn speech. And for that matter, that he didn't have at least minimal "is he, or isn't he gay" anxiety about Alistair. He was like, wham, bam, I wantchu, I wantchu. He was back to "post-modern gay" from 602, as if  he never had the issues he shared with Sam. 

Edited by fakeempress
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I don't think the old characters are the problem, but this season seems to be about assassinating as many characters as possible. They can't really assassinate the newest newbies, so sadly, this was like a nice vacation from the stuff I hate.

If this was a better show, I'd share the frustration. However, since it's not, I'd rather have less of the old characters. Which I don't think is gonna happen. Sure, it was pointless, but nothing had me screaming in horror or groaning in frustration (again except for every time the brat was on screen who officially wins the title of my least favorite glee clubber ever).

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