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S10.E02: Jessa Says Yes to the Dress


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So now he's "The Dashing Ben Seewald"? What, does Jessa think he's Arkansas's answer to Cary Grant or something?

Jessa Blessa has probably never heard of Cary Grant, as he wasn't one of Jesus' disciples. And dashing is not a word I would use to describe that mouth breather. Every time I see her with him I want to yell at the TV, "You can do so much better, girl!" I have a suspicion that Bin is so dumb it takes him forever to wash his hair as he just can't understand when to stop repeating after he lathers and rinses.

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Wow, James is 12 and still learning multiplication tables?! Most kids learn those in third grade. I don't think James is delayed by any means, just that the Duggars are woefully inadequate in providing an education for their children. I will say, I absolutely loved the look on his face when Jill and Derick were gushing over that craptastic baby mobile. Seriously, it probably cost Anna more to FedEx that stupid thing than it was worth. 

 

I feel like these episodes are so anti-climactic. Who really cares about wedding dress shopping when we've already seen Jessa's dress months ago in the People magazine spread?

 

It's pretty obvious Jessa could care less about her wedding. She just wants to get the hell out of Dodge, and the faster the better. You could also tell those church ladies thought it was idiotic to plan an outdoor reception in November, but I'm guessing everyone in NW Arkansas is used to the Duggars' stupidity by now.

Edited by BitterApple
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I heard her say both "JessaBless" AND "Blessa". What's funny is, I don't really remember her using that nickname much before this episode. I know I've heard it before, but it seemed like Michelle was using it right and left last night, to try and prove how "sweet" and "precious" their close, mother-daughter relationship is. Gag me.

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Ok, now I'm confused about Josie....anyone notice how well she counted to 12? She sang the national anthem VERY well especially for her young age....I think her physical health and her motor skills may be at question here. Her mental ability was positively surprising to me. I know that girl won't receive the best she could get, like all the others never did.


Once again, what the hell does Guinn Seewald think was going to happen when she let her 19 year old son marry into a family who believes in absolutely  NO birth control? Her son was like Vesuvius the day before Pompeii...he needed a "release" like no body's business....do they actually think that their son isn't at a high risk to become a daddy soon? It's very likely, unless Jessa is receiving some "mail in a brown paper wrapper" every month.

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Maybe Jessa is getting a Depo-Provera shot every 3 months. 

Ben definitely has allergies. He always sounds congested, and I'm guessing this episode was filmed in September, so he's probably allergic to ragweed.

If Jill doesn't say no to MIchelle, she's soon going to have her whole buddy team living there. Well, maybe not Joy, she's needed at home for the chores. But I'm sure Michelle sees nothing wrong with every other weekend sleepovers for the little girls at Jill's house. I guess she didn't move far enough away. For the record, does anyone know how far away Jill and Derrick are from the compound? Jil mentioned she drives Derrick to work and the popup indicated it's at least 10 miles each way if it's 100 miles every week. (waste of time and gas!) Are Jessa and Ben further away? I wonder if they'll be the next ones to get her whole buddy team visiting her all of the time after the wedding. 

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Ben's dad is a dead ringer for Steve Carrell.  He's been on a few times..

 

You're right, katycat74!  It's been driving me crazy for weeks. Ben's dad totally reminded me of someone but I couldn't nail it down - it's Steven Carell!

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Was this the episode with the James montage? Because I wanted to note that Jill was using basic multiplication flash cards with a 13 year old. Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't those evil public schools cover multiplication tables in the 3rd...maybe 4th grade at the latest? I've always pegged James as potentially ADHD, and the Duggars have admitted that they have kids with LDs, but have never said which kids or what LDs. 

 

That glimpse of the flash cards may have given something away that they didn't want told in their "story." 

 

Yep. In my state - New York - this is third grade curriculum. Good grief, Duggars. If you're going to home-school, do it right, dammit. You're single-handedly tarnishing every other dedicated, serious, hardworking home-schooling family out there.

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Jill makes three round trips a day to Derick's work.  It really isn't very far at all to the HQ.  

 

I wonder if she'll keep up with it when the baby is here.  I bet she probably will but packing up a baby 3 times a day would get old.

 

And I gagged a little when Derick thanked Jill for picking him up.  As if he's going to make him walk home or something lol 

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I missed part of this episode and have to catch it tonight On Demand, so I'm a little out of the loop here.  Jill drives to Derick's work three times per day?  Is one of them for lunch?!  Please tell me she doesn't have lunch with him at the office every day.  These people really don't believe in space, individuality, and autonomy, do they?

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They need to spend this time together because they did not date like most married folks do. They are learning about each other before the wee one gets here.

Just realized I am in the wrong thread.

About Jessa, I loved her dress. It suited her well. And I love her "take charge" attitude when it came to be bridesmaids dresses.

Edited by Jellybeans
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Jessa's dress was really beautiful and looked good on her. The whole bridal shop was weird maybe it would have been more fun if it was just Jessa and Jinger. The rest of her sisters looked bored. Of course Michelle can't have a normal reaction. I honestly wonder how Jill and Jessa react being around normal mothers like Cindy and Guinn who know how to act like a mother. Poor James looked so bored hanging out with Jill and Derick. I can't imagine hanging around your newly married sister and her husband would be that fun. Poor James and those third grade flash cards. Its depressing to see him and the rest of his siblings not getting a good education. Its nice that Jill keeps her siblings around but its got to be awkward for both. I can't imagine how fun it is for  I worry what's going to happen when she has her baby. It makes me even more angry at JimBob and Michelle, Jill should be focusing on her new marriage and her baby. Its her parents job to raise their kids not hers. Loved Guinn's expression when Michelle mentioned she could be a grandmother in a year. I at least hope she tried to talk some sense into her son.  

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Jill makes three round trips a day to Derick's work.  It really isn't very far at all to the HQ.  

 

Wow, what a TREE-mendous waste of time and gas. Well, gas anyway. Jill, for the moment, doesn't have a whole lot of meaningful Anything to occupy her time. I really have to wonder how clean the McMansion is. If I lived there, just keeping all those rooms dusted, floors and windows cleaned would fill a lot of my time. But somehow I doubt this crosses Jill's mind. After all, how many 14-year olds on their first crushes are worried about cleaning their rooms?

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Johanna’s comment that she was at the engagement photo shoot to make sure Jessa and Ben didn’t break the rules was quite telling.  Jim Bob and Michelle really do not trust their kids.

I also noticed this and immediately flashed back to the proposal where it was just Jessa and Ben and Jinger in the church and Jessa and Ben did a front hug straight up for about a minute with Jinger saying nothing. Ma and Pa Duggar probably saw that and no longer trust Ben or Jessa or Jinger. Hence more chaperones who are given stricter guidelines: Joy and Johanna. 

Edited by Temperance
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Yep. In my state - New York - this is third grade curriculum. Good grief, Duggars. If you're going to home-school, do it right, dammit. You're single-handedly tarnishing every other dedicated, serious, hardworking home-schooling family out there.

I guarantee all 19 of these kids are way below where they should be academically. Boob and ClownCar cheated every one of these kids out of a decent education.

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I loved when Guinn said she had been busy raising children. Of course, she followed it up with being about Ben & Jessa probably thinking their timing was too long, whereas, she thought it was too short. But, I think she has MOTY's number. MOTY was not busy at home raising children. 

 

Also, I never realized Derrick smoked until he threw out that cigarette into the brush at the Midwive's office. I wasn't sure then I saw him blow smoke.

 

Ben does have allergies and I think that's what is affecting his voice and his speech pattern. Congested nose will do that to you.

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Yep. In my state - New York - this is third grade curriculum. Good grief, Duggars. If you're going to home-school, do it right, dammit. You're single-handedly tarnishing every other dedicated, serious, hardworking home-schooling family out there.

 

Thank you! As a homeschooler, it is so hard to watch these people fail with their children. And you know, usually I am not one who says kids should know x,y,z by a certain age. That's kind of one of the reason I homeschool, because I believe kids all learn at different paces. But, I don't think that's the issue here. I don't think these kids are behind on certain things because they're lacking aptitude on their part. I think it's simply because education is taken about as seriously as timeliness around there, which is - not at all. My oldest is 6. We don't do grades, but he would be in 1st grade if I sent him. The math curriculum we use already has him learning about and understanding multiplication. We don't do times tables or flashcards at all, but he can tell you what 2x10, 3x4, etc. are. I just think those kids are capable of so much more than they're given. They are stifled beyond belief and learning, of any kind, is not valued in that house. It's so sad. 

 

They need to spend this time together because they did not date like most married folks do. They are learning about each other before the wee one gets here.

 

This really is true. These people may seem immature and stunted, but that's because they have been so sheltered all of their lives, and then are forced to enter into adulthood at lightning speed. A lot of people have commented on how ridiculous it is that Jill and Derek are holding hands in the car as a married couple. But really, they still barely know each other. I remember the beginning of relationships, when you just HAD to touch each other all the time, and my boyfriends would reach over and grab my hand while we were in the car. I think Jill is really still in that stage with Derek. I wish these kids were allowed to "court" longer. 

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I was so glad to hear Ben's mother tell Uterus "one thing at a time." I suspect she is hoping they wait a while before boarding the baby train. Speaking of baby train, what was up with Jill opening the shitty mobile and acting like she had just gotten it in the mail? I guess we're not supposed to remember the episode where Josh and Anna make it as a wedding gift for Jill and Derick.

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Anyone notice how Ben states he wants Jessa's dress to be 'modest' because he's the jealous type. I smell trouble down the road in this marriage.

I hope he's not abusive. Ben needs to get over himself. He thinks he landed a hot prize but really the only thing he got was a girl with no skills and a moldy house provided by his father in law. I've seen better.

My 13 year old is already doing Geometry. And by the time my other kids were 13 they were doing pre algebra/ Algebra. JimChelle totally screwed their kids over. I want these kids tested and the results shown on tv. In my state if a child fails a state test as a homeschooler, the homeschooling program is put on probation. Not the same with Arkansas

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Derick smokes?!! How did I miss this?! Throwing a cigarette off to the side in a yard with a giant propane tank is not a smart move, Derick.

I agree the dress shopping would have gone better with less people. The little girls don't have the patience to sit still and Jana and Joy showed no interest whatsoever. Maybe the siblings are just burnt out on weddings.

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I wish these kids were allowed to "court" longer. 

I don't think it's a matter of not being "allowed" to have a long courtship. It's that naturally, many choose to keep it short because they want to progress to the next (i.e., physical) stage of the relationship. They're not even allowed to hold hands until they're engaged! They've said themselves that the desire for a physical relationship is the reason engagements are so short. So the real problem is with the stupid courtship model itself, not necessarily with the length involved.

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I re-watched it today to check out you posters' keen observations and I noticed some more interesting things:

 

When Michelle decided that Josie would go with them to the bridal shop, did anyone notice the bottle of prescription pills Mullet had in her hand? You could hear those pills jiggling in the bottle as she reached for Miracle child.

Michelle's grammar is as bad as Anna's.

Josie STILL climbs on bedroom furniture, dining room tables, and has NO attention span whatsoever.

At the salon, Jordyn was leaning in towards Michelle needing some attention and Michelle completely ignored the poor kid; she was focused on Josie.

At that appointment, Michelle's mouth feigned a fake smile, but her eyes clearly were NOT smiling or happy in the least. She looked puzzled and unemotional.

What did Guinn expect in saying it's all "so fast"? What an idiot.....after all, wasn't it HER HUSBAND who rushed the proposal already? He clearly wanted this to proceed...did he expect another year engagement and the happy couple said 'no way" are we waiting to kiss or what?

Wow, I have to re watch again ...re: the Derick smoking thing??? Didn't notice that, but I'll check asap...

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I think deridkdillard may have spit out some gum or something like that. I'm pretty sure they had the "smoking talk", as Jill mentioned those pages and pages of interrogation questions she initially grilled him with and smoking was one of the things she asked him about...

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I do not think Michelle is the one to blame for James and the other younger siblings visiting or staying with Jill. Jill whined about Derick going to work, and I bet dollar to donuts she wanted someone to be with her while he was gone. She does not know how to handle being a married woman with a working husband. She is too clingy and needy, and Derick was the first young man outside her male family members and family friends to give her the time of day. It is going to be interesting to see how she deals with a baby and Derick working. I would not be surprise if she puts pressure on Derick to quit his job. Baby Dilly will probably replace the loneliness she feels because Derick has other responsibilities besides staying with her 24/7.

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We should have had the drinking game with "Surreal." Can't these people think of another word to say?

Or Michelle's "I Blinked" Gawd her eyes were really bugging out of her head especially when talking to Ben's mom. It must have been very painful for her to force that much enthusiasm into your acting.

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I re-watched it today to check out you posters' keen observations and I noticed some more interesting things:

 

When Michelle decided that Josie would go with them to the bridal shop, did anyone notice the bottle of prescription pills Mullet had in her hand? You could hear those pills jiggling in the bottle as she reached for Miracle child.

Michelle's grammar is as bad as Anna's.

Josie STILL climbs on bedroom furniture, dining room tables, and has NO attention span whatsoever.

At the salon, Jordyn was leaning in towards Michelle needing some attention and Michelle completely ignored the poor kid; she was focused on Josie.

At that appointment, Michelle's mouth feigned a fake smile, but her eyes clearly were NOT smiling or happy in the least. She looked puzzled and unemotional.

What did Guinn expect in saying it's all "so fast"? What an idiot.....after all, wasn't it HER HUSBAND who rushed the proposal already? He clearly wanted this to proceed...did he expect another year engagement and the happy couple said 'no way" are we waiting to kiss or what?

Wow, I have to re watch again ...re: the Derick smoking thing??? Didn't notice that, but I'll check asap...

Prescription pill bottle, huh? Hmmm, wonder if it was ClownCar's or Josie's? And wonder just what kind of prescription it was? I wish we knew what REALLY goes on in this fake-ass family!
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YES, if you look, it's NOT hard to miss...when Meechelle bends down towards Josie at the soda fountain at home, to tell Josie that she's going with them wedding gown shopping, J'chelle has a transparent prescription bottle in her left hand...plain as day and you really can hear the pills jiggling in there...I wonder whose rx that is, and if it is her super industrial strength Xanax that she appears to use.

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Another red flag. Even my husband, who doesn't usually watch the show, raised an eyebrow on that one.

What alarmed me was the WAY he said it.

Totally controlling and thinks he's BMOC.

There is nothing wrong w/Jill & Derrick holding hands in the car. Aft 30 years of marriage (in June) hubby & I still do. I think snarking on them for that is ridiculous.

I really like Jill, but I have to agree the giggling is getting to be too much.

Beautiful dress Jessa. But ugglee bridesmaids drwsses.

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I loved when Guinn said she had been busy raising children. Of course, she followed it up with being about Ben & Jessa probably thinking their timing was too long, whereas, she thought it was too short. But, I think she has MOTY's number. MOTY was not busy at home raising children.

Also, I never realized Derrick smoked until he threw out that cigarette into the brush at the Midwive's office. I wasn't sure then I saw him blow smoke.

Ben does have allergies and I think that's what is affecting his voice and his speech pattern. Congested nose will do that to you.

I THOUGHT i saw that too..but just thought. .."nawwww"..not a Duggar..oops...Dillard."
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There is nothing wrong w/Jill & Derrick holding hands in the car. Aft 30 years of marriage (in June) hubby & I still do. I think snarking on them for that is ridiculous.

 

 

I totally agree. Hubby and I still do that, too.

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There is nothing wrong w/Jill & Derrick holding hands in the car. Aft 30 years of marriage (in June) hubby & I still do. I think snarking on them for that is ridiculous.

I'm not bothered by their hand-holding but it's just so much so that they probably think the car won't start unless their hands are interlocked.

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I think deridkdillard may have spit out some gum or something like that. I'm pretty sure they had the "smoking talk", as Jill mentioned those pages and pages of interrogation questions she initially grilled him with and smoking was one of the things she asked him about...

 

He didn't spit, he tossed or flicked like smokers do when getting rid of cigarettes. I'll try to get a pic when I see the episode again. Of course, this is the one I didn't DVR.

 

Just found on Demand and it could be gum. Too hard to tell.

Edited by Mom2twoNonna2one
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This really is true. These people may seem immature and stunted, but that's because they have been so sheltered all of their lives, and then are forced to enter into adulthood at lightning speed. A lot of people have commented on how ridiculous it is that Jill and Derek are holding hands in the car as a married couple. But really, they still barely know each other. I remember the beginning of relationships, when you just HAD to touch each other all the time, and my boyfriends would reach over and grab my hand while we were in the car. I think Jill is really still in that stage with Derek. I wish these kids were allowed to "court" longer. 

In Ben and Jessa's case I think JB was hoping they would court longer. They courted for over a year, but JB knew Ben was in no position to provide for a family having been through it with Josh.  Look at the way they announced the engagement. Jessa however was climbing the walls to get out of the house. I think Jill being slightly older was encouraged to marry sooner, before her college-educated good-job man before he could change his mind. 

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Small correction: they courted for 11 months. Before that, they had a "get to know you" period of maybe 4 months when they would have only seen each other when Ben attended the Church of the Holy Airplane Hangar. I don't think they were allowed to text or have facetime before courtship. Tack on the extra 10 weeks of the engagement, and it's about 17-18 months to the altar.

 

eta: That's not a lot of time, but compare that to Jill and derickdillard "getting to know" each other via Skype, courting, engaged, married, and knocked up inside of about 10 months (late August to about July 1 date of conception...yes, someone did the math). 

Edited by Sew Sumi
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I just rewatched the epi and I think Derick tossed gum into the bushes. However the way he flicked it like a cigarette makes me wonder if he was a smoker at one point.

I think Derick and Jill are happy but her clinginess will eventually get on his nerves if she doesn't find something else to occupy her time. I don't know how much more buddy time poor James can take.

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Is there some patented method of flicking that only smokers are privy to? It just looked to me like he tossed the gum into the bushes the way any human being would. :-) It had to be gum; it was too small to be a butt, and I think smoking would be a deal-breaker for Jill.

Loneliness and boredom aside, I wonder if Jill is scared to be alone in the house. It can be a little unnerving being alone in a big, multilevel house if you let your imagination run wild about all the places a intruder could be hiding. It's a situation she has no prior frame of reference for!

Edited by Portia
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I didn't realize how old the little boy (James?) visiting Jill was - here in VA, that's also third grade math. Ouch. Probably more a product of their "schooling" than any specific LD or delay, even if he has any.

Mouthbreather is right. Ben sounds like he has a nasal defect when he talks. Makes me wonder if he has bad breath.

When checking out the mold at the house last week, he mentioned having allergies - serious allergies and antihistamines explain that and how his eyes sometimes look. (I recognize it from the mirror.) Fortunately, swollen tonsils and adenoids and stopped up sinuses and eustachian tubes don't = foul breath - it's not like the tonsils and adenoids are infected just because they're inflammed, since the cause of the swelling isn't viral or bacterial. I've never had strep (maybe once as a kid) or tonsillitis, but my tonsils and adenoids have been notably inflamed for about 12 years.

... Tack on the extra 10 weeks of the engagement, and it's about 17-18 months to the altar.

eta: That's not a lot of time, but compare that to Jill and derickdillard "getting to know" each other via Skype, courting, engaged, married, and knocked up inside of about 10 months (late August to about July 1 date of conception...yes, someone did the math).

Agreed. Jill and Derick are probably better off for marriage in the sense that he has an education and a career (and she could continue midwifery), but Jessa and Ben strike me as more mature together as a couple. Clearly in lust, but they interact in a much more familiar way. They'll have different challenges than Jill and Derick, but I think they knew each other as well and under as many circumstances as they could given their culture's courtship restrictions. Their timeframe is on the short side for non-fundamentalist couples, but actually within a pretty normal range.

After Jessa decided on her dress I was scared to death they were all going to start talking about how to bring the neckline up under her chin and the sleeves down to her wrists. I haven't seen pics of the actual wedding -- did she wear the dress exactly as purchased? It really was gorgeous & looked fantastic on her.

She looked stunning in most of the gowns - I also loved the first one, but it was pretty form-fitting from behind. I was surprised/impressed that she didn't dismiss that fit out of hand when they asked if she didn't want that fit - "well, I don't know," or something. It looks like she wore the blush gown as purchased: http://img2.timeinc.net/people/i/2014/gallery/jessa-duggar-wedding/wedding-7-660x495.jpg (direct photo link from People)

http://www.people.com/article/jessa-duggar-ben-seewald-married-wedding-19-kids-and-counting

Edited by WalrusGirl
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Here's a bunch of screen grabs. I'm pretty sure it's gum. The angle of the roof makes it look like there's a cig in his lips. Shame on you for littering, Derrick! He's going to need a vice to deal with Jill's smothering if she doesn;t tone it down. Maybe a flask in his desk at work?

 

http://imgur.com/79s3acK,PB0jeGf,Q0cLOGR,AhDC1Mn,jLfXFCO,7UglRdu,R3Y0WJ0,TTddGnZ,WU3t9SE,fdh7uEh,WPDdVxi,SRrfvS1,79BTYSs

 

BONUS: 3 grabs of Michelle and the pill bottle. The label is turned away from the camera. Maybe anti-convulsant meds for Josie?

http://imgur.com/Ffj9U0w,CgKZAud,cdWBg98#0

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