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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by JTMacc99,

Your pet peeves are your pet peeves, and you should feel free to express them here. This topic is not to be used to say you are peeved by another member of this community or something they said, either in this topic, or somewhere else in the forums. Additionally, please take ALL language related peeves (word usage, regional sayings, punctuation...) to the Grammar topic.

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On 3/4/2019 at 7:16 AM, Katy M said:

Reminds me of the time a TSA agent yelled at me for taking off my sneakers even though that's what I'd done every other time I'd gone through security (at the same airport for that matter).

I was yelled at by a TSA agent because I had braclets on my arm. I had asked the woman TSA agent who was walking up and down the line reminding folks to take of belts and change out their pockets if I should take off my bracelets and she said no. I didn't bother arguing with the TSA agent who yelled at me but jeez louise, you both need to get on the same page!

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I'm peeved by the speakerphone function. 

Phone conversations are meant to be private (unless we're on a soap opera, where someone else picks up the second connection) and it's really awkward and uncomfortable to be listening to their conversation as you're driving in the car, walking by, next to you, etc. 

Use the hands free or a Bluetooth device. 

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I usually take a break at 4:00 to go for a walk, but rain is coming, so I went around 2:30, not thinking about the fact that on my way home I'd be walking past schools at the time students get out.  The little kids were gone, as I think the elementary school gets out earlier, but there were quite a number of teenagers left.  Ho-ly shit.  Kudos to the teachers, coaches, crossing guards, etc. who endure these folks, because I would rather cut off half my toe and soak my foot in alcohol than spend five minutes in the presence of a group of teenagers. 

I lost track of how many walking two or three across (taking up the whole sidewalk) didn't move over until they realized I would go ahead and run right into them if they didn't (I will play chicken with anyone other than the infirm - move the fuck over onto your side when passing by someone coming the other way).  One guy got yanked over at the last second by his companion with a "Let her by, asshole," so she cheered me up.  Then I came to an intersection a few blocks past the schools where a bunch of them apparently wait to be picked up, and found a good dozen teenagers milling around on a corner house's front lawn.  Oh, hell no.  I would literally be the "You kids get off my lawn" lady.

On the bright side, yesterday I was unloading groceries onto the conveyor belt but couldn't yet reach the closest divider, and the little kid in front of me (he was behind his mom) stretched across to get it and put it in place for me.  I said, "Thank you, that was polite," and he tugged on his mom's sleeve to ask if she heard that, I called him polite.  With a big grin on his face.  I'm not good with ages, but I'd say he was around eight.  And proud to be called polite by an adult.  There may be hope after all.

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Its been brutally hot all week. Tonight's temperature dropped to a perfect 70 but no one can enjoy it as a controlled burn of the Everglades is blanketing my county with thick smoke. Yay. 

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19 hours ago, Stenbeck said:

I'm peeved by the speakerphone function. 

Phone conversations are meant to be private (unless we're on a soap opera, where someone else picks up the second connection) and it's really awkward and uncomfortable to be listening to their conversation as you're driving in the car, walking by, next to you, etc. 

Use the hands free or a Bluetooth device. 

The hands-free option in my car uses a microphone near the rear view mirror and the radio speakers.  It also lets me control the phone using steering wheel controls and voice commands.  I'm not going to purchase a separate Bluetooth device to stick in my ear when I'm driving.

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This is a pet peeve about people who have spent too much time at Toast Masters and can't just say "congratulations".  A good friend, who addresses international corporate audiences weekly, just received an extremely prestigious professional award. A mutual friend who has spent too much time at confidence building seminars posted "That's tremendous. If you think you'll be up for any more awards in the near future, let me know, happy to help you be prepared for that impromptu thank you speech the next time... :-)"

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Filed under People, online behavior of

My computer mouse was acting up and I posted a question on my community discussion board. I fully explained what I had already tried. The first response gave me a suggestion that solved the problem. I posted a comment that it worked, everything was back to normal, thanks a lot.

Pretty sure you all know what happened next.

Spoiler

Several more responses after I said it was fixed, with suggestions to change the battery, buy a new mouse, reboot the computer, switch to Apple, switch to Chromebook, and the number for a tech repair place.

I mean, it's not like there were 50 responses to read through. Two comments displayed on the same screen, no scrolling required.

Oy.

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Pet Peeve for this week: Trying to cancel my DirecTv service because I am moving and instead of a quick conversation I have to spend 20 minutes on the phone explaining why I can't transfer service (the new house has too many trees that block reception) and listening to the rep explain why I can't get my $70 credit until they have a technician come out and "double check" that I can't get reception. So now I have to block another morning while I wait for said technician to basically drive up to the house and say "yep, no service here." As is if this move hasn't been frustrating enough.

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38 minutes ago, GoodieGirl said:

Pet Peeve for this week: Trying to cancel my DirecTv service because I am moving and instead of a quick conversation I have to spend 20 minutes on the phone explaining why I can't transfer service (the new house has too many trees that block reception) and listening to the rep explain why I can't get my $70 credit until they have a technician come out and "double check" that I can't get reception. So now I have to block another morning while I wait for said technician to basically drive up to the house and say "yep, no service here." As is if this move hasn't been frustrating enough.

That sounds annoying. Are you in a contract with them?

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@theredhead77, yes I am, hence the $70 credit, they are waiving the $20 early termination fee though. I was more frustrated with length of the call*, she kept putting me on hold to "ask a manager". Fine, if they want to waste their technician's time in driving out to the house, it's their call. 

*I was hoping it would be a quick 5 minute conversation as I was waiting for the carpet cleaner to come to my house. When he arrived the rep was still going over 'details' and wouldn't stop talking so I could tell her to just book the appt. 

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On 3/1/2019 at 5:34 PM, 2727 said:

I use a grocery pickup service; order online and employees bring it all out to my car.

I can specify whether or not I want substitutions if something is out of stock. I do usually want it but only if the employees use their heads.

Order: liter bottle of Fresca. Seems like a six pack of Fresca would be the logical substitute, but no. Twice they've given me a liter bottle of Sprite. I would have accepted that if it  had at least been diet.

Order: [X] brand jar of spicy salsa. What is the operative descriptor there? Not spicy, apparently, because they selected [X] brand in mild.

Along the same lines, [X] brand barbecue potato chips. They decided [X] brand regular chips would do.

Not to mention the two times I got cucumbers instead of zucchini.

I don't think I'm asking them to be mind-readers here. Isn't it just a bit of common sense?

Arrrrggggh, I complain about the horrible shoppers and quality all the time, yet I think I still prefer it to actually doing the food shopping myself. I hate that chore worst of all! As for substitutions, they once gave me real hamburgers in place of my vegan ones, and dairy yogurt instead of nondairy. But, another time, they opted to bring me no paper towels instead of whatever out-of-stock brand I had ordered. 

[This is a quoted thing but apparently we can't quote after editing, I guess?] But I worked in a bookstore and remember having a few customers who came in two minutes before the store closed for the night and decided they needed to find a particular book right then and there (and that was if they remembered the name of the book, which of course, many of them didn't). Really? You can't possibly wait until the next day? [end of quoted material]

I worked in a bookstore too, way back when--one of the first B&N "superstores" in our area. And believe me, I could fill this entire thread with peeves from that place, haha!

Edited by TattleTeeny
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2 hours ago, GoodieGirl said:

Pet Peeve for this week: Trying to cancel my DirecTv service because I am moving and instead of a quick conversation I have to spend 20 minutes on the phone explaining why I can't transfer service (the new house has too many trees that block reception) and listening to the rep explain why I can't get my $70 credit until they have a technician come out and "double check" that I can't get reception. So now I have to block another morning while I wait for said technician to basically drive up to the house and say "yep, no service here." As is if this move hasn't been frustrating enough.

Oh jeez, this does not bode well for me. I have just moved my dad into memory care and he has Direct TV. Golly gee whiz am I looking forward to that phone call. 

scared mae whitman GIF by Good Girls
 
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1 hour ago, GoodieGirl said:

I was hoping it would be a quick 5 minute conversation

It's maddening when companies don't allow customers to cancel online. Like some "closer" haranguing them on the phone for 15 minutes is going to change their minds.

39 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

As for substitutions, they once gave me real hamburgers in place of my vegan ones, and dairy yogurt instead of nondairy. But, another time, they opted to bring me no paper towels instead of whatever out-of-stock brand I had ordered. 

It's so silly. I really wish the store I use would add a danged text box for customers to specify substitutions: "Literally any other paper towels in the store."

Edited by 2727
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7 minutes ago, 2727 said:

It's maddening when companies don't allow customers to cancel online. Like some "closer" haranguing them for 15 minutes is going to change their minds.

It's so silly. I really wish the store I use would add a danged text box for customers to specify substitutions: "Literally any other paper towels in the store."

Yeah, ours takes an "all or nothing" approach -- either you're a super-chill substitute-accepter...

or a stick-in-the-mud substitute denier, haha!

Really though, I would think that the faux burgers (and not the paper towels) would be the thing that the shopper chose to leave up to me. 

Edited by TattleTeeny
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2 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

Really though, I would think that the faux burgers (and not the paper towels) would be the thing that the shopper chose to leave up to me. 

Indeed.  I said before that just having an overall substitutions yay or nay option, rather than allowing the customer to specify on some items that only a certain type of substitution - same price, same brand, same flavor, etc. - or no substitution is acceptable, expects too much of the employee, but damn.  The odds of someone being so attached to a specific brand of paper towel they'd rather go without than have another are exponentially lower than someone who asks for vegan burgers saying, "Yeah, sure - cow is fine, too."

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2 hours ago, GoodieGirl said:

yes I am, hence the $70 credit, they are waiving the $20 early termination fee though.

Oy. Hopefully the technician visit will be quick and done. 

4 hours ago, theredhead77 said:

However reading is required and we all know reading is hard!!! /hair twirl

Quoting myself here because about 2 hours after posting "reading his hard!!!!" I  recieved an email response asking if I can remove all these irrelavent images. This was in direct response to an email I sent stating "we flagged the images for removal and xxxx is going to reach out to their Google contacts tomorrow to escalate"

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My worst example yet of someone failing to read was a few years ago when I ordered a cell phone battery and it didn't show up.  I'm sure I posted here at the time, but it's so egregious I'm going to repeat myself.

I emailed the company that regarding Order X, USPS Tracking # Y showed it out for delivery the morning of Z date, but it was never delivered and now tracking shows the status as basically "hm, beats the hell out of us," so the package appears to have been lost and to please send a replacement.  In other words, every single piece of relevant information was contained in my original email, which was a short paragraph.

The customer service rep wrote back, "USPS Tracking for this order X is #Y and it shows [hm, beats us] status."

I replied, "Yes, I know; that's the information I sent you.  As I said, the package appears to be lost.  Please send a replacement ASAP."  Reiterating all relevant information, in even shorter form.

His response (and it was the same guy; small company): "It seems the package may have been lost.  Would you like a refund or a replacement?"

Oh my gods.  If you would have read my email(s) rather than your script, the damn thing could have already been in the mail.  (I'd have said never mind - refund, and I'll give my money to someone less stupid, but it was a very old phone and the battery was hard to come by.)

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I've never tried ordering on-line and having the supermarket deliver to me, but a neighbor sometimes used that service when she had a newborn and a toddler occupying most of her time and energy.  I was visiting her once when the deliveryman arrived and brought in everything except the diapers she'd ordered.  He apologized that the store was out of the size she needed, but the clerk packing her order had seen fit to include an extra bottle of brandy instead of just the single bottle she'd requested.   We all agreed that the clerk seemed to have great good sense.  

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16 hours ago, 2727 said:

It's maddening when companies don't allow customers to cancel online. Like some "closer" haranguing them on the phone for 15 minutes is going to change their minds.

This! It seems whenever I call a company I get a recording that says "Did you know you can do XYZ thing you're calling about on our website at www.poscompany.com?" If I was calling to "cancel" in order to get a better deal fine, but I should have an option to cancel on-line without a hassle.

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Waaaaaaaaay back in November I ordered a bed from Macy's. I loved this style and the bed was a steal. I knew it was back ordered until March and starting in January I had contacted Macy's to change my payment method from an AMEX to a Visa. They said my options were to cancel the AMEX card and Macy's would call for an updated payment method, or cancel the order but if I cancelled the order there was no guarantee I wouldn't end up at the end of the waiting list.

So I cancelled my Amex in Feb and today what do I see? A new pending charge. I called Macy's and they were useless. I called AMEX and reached a helpful rep who tried to call Macy's for me, and ran into the same uselessness I did. So I called the 800 number to see if I cancelled and reordered the bed today (since it's supposed to be delivered around this weekend) wold that still happen. The rep I spoke with barely get a word out before interrupting me and telling me it would be at least 90 more days.

So I said fuck it and cancelled the entire order. 
Their hold times are absurd (it wasn't absurd when I placed the order) and if customer service is this bad now how bad will it be if I had an actual issue post delivery??

I'm super bummed because I loved the bed and the price was right.

Edited by theredhead77
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4 minutes ago, theredhead77 said:

Waaaaaaaaay back in November I ordered a bed from Macy's. I loved this style and the bed was a steal. I knew it was back ordered until March and starting in January I had contacted Macy's to change my payment method from an AMEX to a Visa. They said my options were to cancel the AMEX card and Macy's would call for an updated payment method, or cancel the order but if I cancelled the order there was no guarantee I wouldn't end up at the end of the waiting list.

So I cancelled my Amex in Feb and today what do I see? A new pending charge. I called Macy's and they were useless. I called AMEX and reached a helpful rep who tried to call Macy's for me, and ran into the same uselessness I did. So I called the 800 number to see if I cancelled and reordered the bed today (since it's supposed to be delivered around this weekend) wold that still happen. The rep I spoke with barely get a word out before interrupting me and telling me it would be at least 90 more days.

So I said fuck it and cancelled the entire order. 
Their hold times are absurd (it wasn't absurd when I placed the order) and if customer service is this bad now how bad will it be if I had an actual issue post delivery??

I'm super bummed because I loved the bed and the price was right.

That is ridiculous.  Changing your method of payment before your card has been charged should be a non-issue. I can see it getting flubbed up if you call to change it the same day it's getting charged, but just straight up telling you no, I can't even see the logic behind that.  As long as they get paid, what do they care what card you use?

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3 minutes ago, Katy M said:

That is ridiculous.  Changing your method of payment before your card has been charged should be a non-issue. I can see it getting flubbed up if you call to change it the same day it's getting charged, but just straight up telling you no, I can't even see the logic behind that.  As long as they get paid, what do they care what card you use?

Exactly! I was even ok with the 'get AMEX to reject the pre-authorization and cancel your card' route because while inconvenient I haven't used the card in a year and didn't have anything to update.

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22 hours ago, Bastet said:

If you would have read my email(s) rather than your script, the damn thing could have already been in the mail. 

Just today I accidentally hit a link on Kindle that ordered the audible version of the book (like, would a confirmation window kill you, Amazon?). I immediately opened an online chat, gave them the order number and said it was a mistake on my part. The agent said he'd have to refer me to the complaints department. Hm. Eventually the new person comes on, reads my one previous comment and asks if I need a refund. Well, yes. Excuse me for not saying those exact words.

8 hours ago, GoodieGirl said:

It seems whenever I call a company I get a recording that says "Did you know you can do XYZ thing you're calling about on our website at www.poscompany.com?"

I am sympathetic to the company's desire to conserve staff resources and stop repeating themselves, and realize they don't know me. But I assure you I have already done everything I could to avoid making this call in the first place and have gone through your site link by link to try to find an answer. Therefore, none of your phone tree suggestions apply to me. If you also see fit not to offer an option for "other questions," I'm sorry but I'm not going to be in the jolliest of moods when I finally get through to someone.

Edited by 2727
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UUUGGHHHHHH, speaking of the shopping peeves--

I was paying for stuff at Petco--like standing at the register with a basket and a wallet. Some lady marched right up to the cashier who was helping me and said, "I need Whatever-the-Hell for my dog." The cashier asked her to wait for a minute (there was no one waiting in line after me), to which that lady responded, "You can't help me now?!"

Edited by TattleTeeny
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I'd have loudly said something like, "Oh no, did I accidentally don my invisibility cloak today?" 

If she had asked, "You can't just tell me what aisle it's in?" that would still have been rude, because a) if she only wanted to be pointed in the right direction, she should have asked "Where can I find X?" rather than say "I need X" and b) it doesn't matter, because if she wants to know where something is she should wait until you've completed your transaction and then ask, but the fact she phrased it as "You can't help me now?!" makes it seem like she really did expect the cashier to walk away from you and escort her over to it/go get it for her.  Which is a big ball of WTF.

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Ahahhahahahaaaa, @Bastet--that IS what I said to my BF when I got home (I'm working at home today and he's home sick). To the lady, I just said, "But I am paying right now" as if I was speaking to a small child. To be honest, had she just asked to be pointed in the right direction (and had her attitude been different), I likely wouldn't have cared a bit!

Edited by TattleTeeny
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19 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

Ahahhahahahaaaa, @Bastet--that IS what I said to my BF when I got home (I'm working at home today and he's home sick). To the lady, I just said, "But I am paying right now" as if I was speaking to a small child. To be honest, had she just asked to be pointed in the right direction (and had her attitude been different), I likely wouldn't have cared a bit!

These kinds of people always think the world is out to get them. There is an old saying that applies:

If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you're the asshole.

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I went to Macy's to return a pair of shoes (unrelated to my new anger fueled boycott) and found a pair of cute shoes in their The Finish Line area. I figured they were part of The Finish Line so I stood at the counter as 2 associates walked past me and a third walked past me, turned around with food in her mouth and a box of food in her hand and told me I had to go to the Macy's area. Uh, ok but why the fuck are you eating on the floor?

I said something to the Macy's manager who is going to talk to their manager. Just reinforces my decision to not go to Macy's.

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4 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

UUUGGHHHHHH, speaking of the shopping peeves--

I was paying for stuff at Petco--like standing at the register with a basket and a wallet. Some lady marched right up to the cashier who was helping me and said, "I need Whatever-the-Hell for my dog." The cashier asked her to wait for a minute (there was no one waiting in line after me), to which that lady responded, "You can't help me now?!"

That happened to me once when I worked at the bookstore. I was in the midst of checking somebody out, and there was a line of customers starting to form behind them.

All of a sudden, some random customer who wasn't part of the line just pops up right next to the person I'm ringing up and starts asking me questions about where to find stuff in the store. Sure, buddy, I'm totally not busy here, let me get right on that!

Besides that, the bookstore wasn't that big a place-you could stand at the front of the store and get a pretty good idea of where everything was inside it. All they really had to do was walk a few steps further and they were likely going to find the section/books they were looking for. 

Some of these people, you wonder if they've ever been inside a store before. 

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47 minutes ago, Annber03 said:

That happened to me once when I worked at the bookstore. I was in the midst of checking somebody out, and there was a line of customers starting to form behind them.

All of a sudden, some random customer who wasn't part of the line just pops up right next to the person I'm ringing up and starts asking me questions about where to find stuff in the store. Sure, buddy, I'm totally not busy here, let me get right on that!

Besides that, the bookstore wasn't that big a place-you could stand at the front of the store and get a pretty good idea of where everything was inside it. All they really had to do was walk a few steps further and they were likely going to find the section/books they were looking for. 

Some of these people, you wonder if they've ever been inside a store before. 

Oh, I've said it before, I too worked in a bookstore and oh my goodness, I could fill a book about how crazy people were. And then sell that book to obnoxious shoppers!

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16 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

Oh, I've said it before, I too worked in a bookstore and oh my goodness, I could fill a book about how crazy people were. And then sell that book to obnoxious shoppers!

LOL, same :D. 

I don't know if you (or anyone else here, for that matter) has read it, but there is a book that came out a number of years back called The Customer is NOT Always Right that has some ridiculous stories of that sort. I imagine many here would get quite a kick out of it :p. 

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I think there used to be a website called that--sort of like the Texts From Last Night one, but with retail horror stories. There's also a great book called Waiting, filled with stories from food servers from all kinds of different types of restaurants.

ETA: Bookstore horror stories. And from experience, I have no reason to doubt that any of these actually happened!

https://notalwaysright.com/search/bookstore/page/1/

Edited by TattleTeeny
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Godless vending machine did not put mocha in my mocha latte. Also lied about accepting $5 bills and then got tetchy about whether to read my credit card.

I blame EDT. If it wasn't dark in the morning again, after I'd adjusted to the natural change of light in the mornings, I wouldn't stay in bed until the last possible minute, which means I would have time to make coffee and have breakfast before coming to work at 8 and wouldn't have to interact with our machine overlords.

I also blame spring break, which I do not get to take, because all of the food outlets on campus are closed.

Life. Don't talk to me about life.

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I live near a Whole Foods.  That store has, as of late, had A LOT of supply issues.  And when I finally asked why, they said it was a corporate thing.  If you're going to charge us that much, maybe you shouldn't have empty shelves, eh, Amazon??!!!!!

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13 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I'm starting to rack up grocery store asshole-customer stories.

There are a couple of sub Reddits you could check out. r/idon'tworkherelady and r/talesfromretail. Some are hilarious, others are just cringe inducing.

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18 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I'm starting to rack up grocery store asshole-customer stories.

Six years cashiering at A&P.  I think I've blocked it all out. 

So, I have relatively long nails, and I broke my thumbnail somehow all the way down past the quick.  It's driving me crazy for two reasons.  One, it hurts like a bitch, and two, I'm useless without it apparently.  I couldn't unfasten my pants before, and then I was trying to rip off a piece of medical tape and couldn't do that either. 

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On 1/4/2019 at 9:56 AM, Mindthinkr said:

Hearing this: 

What did you accomplish today? 

I read a 400 page book. It was good and I couldn’t put it down. 

Oh, so you sat on your ass and did nothing. 

Probably a religious joker who thinks that any form of entertainment (television, radio, books) is laziness, no matter how long you're engaged in it for (just a guess).

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3 hours ago, bmasters9 said:

Probably a religious joker who thinks that any form of entertainment (television, radio, books) is laziness, no matter how long you're engaged in it for (just a guess).

Not religious. An Engineer who thinks that everything works best on a model of hard exacting work. I’ve come to the conclusion that there is no pleasing him. My nails aren’t right because I wear polish and they should be nude with a short length and clear nail polish. He’s also a bit of a narcissist. I have backed up from the relationship. In no way am I going to compromise with being controlled. I also won’t subscribe to verbal abuse. Do I still do things with him....yes. Only when I choose and if he gets critical I leave. He also thinks that SM is a waste of time which is why I haven’t posted as much. Ha, he’s away for 3 weeks and the freedom feels great. Pet peeve....controlling/manipulative people. 

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Mindthinkr, screw that, you post here as much as you want! I would cut all ties with this guy, he sounds like someone who could get dangerous. No one should be that critical or controlling over things like nail polish.

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8 minutes ago, emma675 said:

Mindthinkr, screw that, you post here as much as you want! I would cut all ties with this guy, he sounds like someone who could get dangerous. No one should be that critical or controlling over things like nail polish.

He’s my next door neighbor and the neighborhood always invites us to social events together since we are the only singles. It’s ok in a group setting because I feel no need to stand by his side. I know I deserve better than that from a partner so I’m staying single. 

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@Mindthinkr, every time you post something about this guy (I'm assuming it's the same guy all along), he goes up a notch on my Total Tool Meter.  Ditch him!  Either way, though, get back to hanging out with us here -- it's good to see you pop up again.

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1 hour ago, Mindthinkr said:

Not religious. An Engineer who thinks that everything works best on a model of hard exacting work. I’ve come to the conclusion that there is no pleasing him. My nails aren’t right because I wear polish and they should be nude with a short length and clear nail polish. He’s also a bit of a narcissist. I have backed up from the relationship. In no way am I going to compromise with being controlled. I also won’t subscribe to verbal abuse. Do I still do things with him....yes. Only when I choose and if he gets critical I leave. He also thinks that SM is a waste of time which is why I haven’t posted as much. Ha, he’s away for 3 weeks and the freedom feels great. Pet peeve....controlling/manipulative people. 

I worked with engineers for ten years. Everything is black and white to them. They are not imaginative at all. Having a degree doesn't make you well educated it just means you've learned a certain skill set.

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6 hours ago, Mindthinkr said:

... He also thinks that SM is a waste of time which is why I haven’t posted as much. ... 

I'm old and not sure what "SM" means.  I am familiar with "S&M" (not through experience with the activity, just from reading The Village Voice and The Berkeley Barb in my youth), but that didn't seem to fit the context here.  So I assume "SM" refers to "social media"?  Acronyms are a curse!

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2 hours ago, fairffaxx said:

I'm old and not sure what "SM" means.  I am familiar with "S&M" (not through experience with the activity, just from reading The Village Voice and The Berkeley Barb in my youth), but that didn't seem to fit the context here.  So I assume "SM" refers to "social media"?  Acronyms are a curse!

Yes, social media.

And I thought it was bad that I have to work with my narcissistic ex! Being next door neighbors.... 🤢

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