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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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28 minutes ago, DeLurker said:

And the other kids are perfectly happy with that too - it is some form of demented Mom competition that makes everything over the top.

My daughter has been taking reusable containers in her lunch since she started 1st grade (she's in 10th now).  But that was a personal choice that I was making and it works out well for her (check out the Systema storage containers - they are the best).  Where are you that restricts plastic baggies?

I only use reusable containers for school lunches. I have used the Systema storage containers but my new fave is the Easy Lunch Box system and I use either a small thermos or Rubbermaid drink box for milk/water/juice, etc. I do like to use a little plastic snack bag for things like pretzels or gold fish from time to time. 

My kids are in the public school system but I have several friends whose kids attend private schools and the no sandwhich baggies rule pertains to them. We live in a very liberal, eco friendly, hippie-dippie area so restrictions like that barely make me bat an eyelash anymore.

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And here I grew up in the era of waxed paper for sandwiches! That shit never stayed wrapped. You put the sandwich at the bottom of the bag, flaps down, added your piece of fruit on top to weigh it in place, then your bag of chips.

Are bags of chips disallowed at schools now, too?

Edited by Lord Donia
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9 hours ago, JTMacc99 said:

The thing is, as of this year NO HOME PREPARED FOODS OF ANY KIND are allowed in the classrooms for parties. If you want to have a little celebration for your child in the classroom, you fill out a form from the cafeteria and pay them for what it is you want.  Cookie and a drink for everybody was what I selected for my daughter.  I'm not a fan of this, but I guess I understand why it's being done. 

Yeah, that's been the rule for a while where I am.  Mainly because of food allergies, but also, there have been a few cases of food poisoning in various places, traced back to home-baked goods.  Schools want to avoid liability.

When my son was little, he had a life-threatening allergy to peanuts.   I asked that the school parties, in his class, be peanut-free, and was told no, it would be impossible to cater to every food "preference".  Basically, I had to attend every class party in order for him to participate, so I could make sure he wasn't given anything with peanuts.   Times have changed since then, as there are entire schools enforcing a "peanut-free" policy. 

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I don't have life threatening allergies, but I empathize with those who do so I understand the peanut rules.

Back in the day of no air conditioning in grade school I don't know how we survived with the lunches we brought from home. Picture this. A hot tuna salad sandwich full of mayo sitting in the classroom from 7:30 ish to 1 o'clock YIKES. And there was warm milk (all cold or very hot would have been better. but warm..... eewww) in a thermos.. I'm still alive. :-)

And don't get me started on no seatbelts in the car  We used to run loose in the neighborhood til dark.  We had a swing set that was not secured to the ground so it swayed with every swing and almost turned over, flinging us to the CEMENT.

I hope this post counts as a pet peeve.  Bitching about the past is a peeve, maybe? Or the peeve could be that kids today don't seem to  know how lucky they are?

And PS we only had three tv channels that we had to ......THE HORROR get up to change the channel. And there was one phone tethered to the wall. OH the humanity  

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I should clarify. Those quotes I posted above were from my mother, not the other woman I was complaining about in the other stories. I'll take my further rants to the relationship thread that I just found.

I love my mother bc she's mom, but she criticizes every little thing and then makes me feel guilty for getting angry or not wanting to be scrutinized to death. Off to the other thread. .....

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Okay, reading all these posts have taught me a lesson following my pet peeve a few pages back.  From now on, when invited to a party, I will still ask if I can bring something.  If they say yes, I will bring ONE small easy to make recipe.  If nobody eats it, I will try not to take it personally.  I will live with the concept that some people don't know good food anymore.

If they say not to bring anything, I will thank them for their hospitality the next day either in person or via e-mail.  The end.

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19 hours ago, rcc said:

My sister insists on doing everything herself then she complains to her friends and in-laws that she has to do everything for her family. It is just a way to play the martyr. Suffice to say I no longer have anything to do with her because that is one of many things she has said and done.

Oh wow!  this is my sister in law - but it goes further than just food and gatherings.  It's like she wants me to "know" she is the best kid in her family so constantly tells me stuff she does for the family that my significant other does not.  However it is all self imposed stuff to make her look like a martyr.  She defines the rules then if people don't live up to them she calls them lacking.  For example, my SO's young adult son (age 23) got behind on his cell phone bill.  She pays it then blasts me with messages about how she had to pay his stuff because the father (my SO) doesn't care.   We are all like: hey, if we pay it then he doesn't learn....because this kid goes on and on, it's not just one thing, he constantly doesn't think things through and expects everyone to save him

Also, i stopped the family gatherings because she says no help is needed then storms around the kitchen for 2 hours while we sit awkwardly.  When we offer to help again -- nope, storming continues.  Then by the meal there is a huge cloud over her head and she has the attitude like we have abused her.  Needless to say the meal at that point is very undigestable because all I want to do is yell "Really?  Is this the dance you all do in your family and no one calls her out on it?"

 

Okay rant done :)

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4 hours ago, Qoass said:

Okay, reading all these posts have taught me a lesson following my pet peeve a few pages back.  From now on, when invited to a party, I will still ask if I can bring something.  If they say yes, I will bring ONE small easy to make recipe.  If nobody eats it, I will try not to take it personally.  I will live with the concept that some people don't know good food anymore.

I am an amateur baker and am always assigned desserts by my friends/family for gatherings and quite often they go untouched so I stopped making them.

It's not (as far as I can tell) because people don't like them but because they get full on snacks and don't want a cupcake. So many people are trying to be healthy that a dessert is just easier to skip than a dip or something. In addition to that I've found if I make cupcakes vs. cake/pie etc. that will ALWAYS get eaten faster because people are shy about "starting" a dish but if it's a single serve thing they can just pick up they're more likely to take it. 

I now only make cupcakes/precut bars etc. if asked and only if it's a specific request. If it's "Lisin can bring something sweet" often what I bring will be very very simple and involve fruit. Again, because people trying to be healthy will eat that and I don't feel like I wasted a whole day making something awesome that got two bites taken out of because people "shared" a slice.

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28 minutes ago, Lisin said:

I am an amateur baker and am always assigned desserts by my friends/family for gatherings and quite often they go untouched so I stopped making them.

It's not (as far as I can tell) because people don't like them but because they get full on snacks and don't want a cupcake. So many people are trying to be healthy that a dessert is just easier to skip than a dip or something. In addition to that I've found if I make cupcakes vs. cake/pie etc. that will ALWAYS get eaten faster because people are shy about "starting" a dish but if it's a single serve thing they can just pick up they're more likely to take it. 

I now only make cupcakes/precut bars etc. if asked and only if it's a specific request. If it's "Lisin can bring something sweet" often what I bring will be very very simple and involve fruit. Again, because people trying to be healthy will eat that and I don't feel like I wasted a whole day making something awesome that got two bites taken out of because people "shared" a slice.

The cupcake/precut bars idea is brilliant - think I'll be adopting that.

1 hour ago, JTMacc99 said:

Oh yes @MrsMoltisanti, the martyr. Always a delight to run into one of them.  What was it that I said? 

  • So many people just suck.

I'll just keep trying to lead by example, but it isn't easy.

Funny how the negative attitude of one or two people can taint what should be a pleasant get-together.

In all honesty I don't think "many" people suck - really just a few do.  But they seem to be parsed out among everyone's family or social circle so they seem unavoidable.

I used to be married to that person and it was no cakewalk to have to show up to these things with him knowing there was going to be a bfd made over something not the least bit important.  The collective problem was that he had trained all of us how to tiptoe around his feelings and so rarely did anyone call him on his crap.  I was always in the preemptive mode trying to make sure he wasn't a ticking time bomb going into gatherings, his family was always playing defense in flag football when he was playing offense in the pro league, and after the fact I was the one trying to talk him down from whatever anger spire he was on.  Basically, we were all held emotionally hostage by this one person.

Everything combined in my marriage made it an abusive relationship for me.  From reading the comments here and realizing similar crap goes on in a lot of families, I realize that every relationship - family or friend - he had was abusive.  There's all these euphemisms used to describe these people - challenging, difficult, high strung, etc...but if we strip away our notion of what an abuser looks like (and what a victim looks like), the word abusive probably encapsulates  the dynamic.

Edited by DeLurker
Now I am going to grumble bitterly about how dumb I was and for way too long.
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5 hours ago, Qoass said:

Okay, reading all these posts have taught me a lesson following my pet peeve a few pages back.  From now on, when invited to a party, I will still ask if I can bring something.  If they say yes, I will bring ONE small easy to make recipe.  If nobody eats it, I will try not to take it personally.  I will live with the concept that some people don't know good food anymore.

If they say not to bring anything, I will thank them for their hospitality the next day either in person or via e-mail.  The end.

I think that sometimes the asking part is all a host really wants anyway. If I ask in advance and get told no, I just send a text right before I leave for the party, asking if the hosts needs me to make a stop for anything they need. The answer to that is almost always yes, and they are always super relieved. Mostly though, my friends don't even care one way or the other what anyone in the core group does. We had an Xmas "terrible gift" exchange that I completely forgot about like a dope and I was still commanded to participate in even though I didn't contribute*. It's fun to have that kind of friends.

Edited by TattleTeeny
* I'm sad that I forgot...I just know I would be fabulous at finding the most terrible of gifts!
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1 hour ago, MrsMoltisanti said:

Oh wow!  this is my sister in law - but it goes further than just food and gatherings.  It's like she wants me to "know" she is the best kid in her family so constantly tells me stuff she does for the family that my significant other does not.  However it is all self imposed stuff to make her look like a martyr.  She defines the rules then if people don't live up to them she calls them lacking.  For example, my SO's young adult son (age 23) got behind on his cell phone bill.  She pays it then blasts me with messages about how she had to pay his stuff because the father (my SO) doesn't care.   We are all like: hey, if we pay it then he doesn't learn....because this kid goes on and on, it's not just one thing, he constantly doesn't think things through and expects everyone to save him

Also, i stopped the family gatherings because she says no help is needed then storms around the kitchen for 2 hours while we sit awkwardly.  When we offer to help again -- nope, storming continues.  Then by the meal there is a huge cloud over her head and she has the attitude like we have abused her.  Needless to say the meal at that point is very undigestable because all I want to do is yell "Really?  Is this the dance you all do in your family and no one calls her out on it?"

 

Okay rant done :)

Oh wow. THIS ^^^^^^^^^ so much THIS^^^^^

And MrsM, please join me in the relationships thread and the family thread . (I just found those) Join me in ranting venting! HUGS!

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Here's a peeve. People who hold grudges for fucking YEARS over small things. I had several miscarriages and they all happened around Christmas. SO guess what? I WAS SAD AT CHRISTMAS. I did not feel like celebrating. I was devastated. All my mother STILL wants to talk about is that I didn't show up...... and let's talk about my weight while we're at it picking me apart bit by bit..  I just don't care anymore. OK I do care, but not as much as before. When I thought about it, my weight has never been "right." Even when I weighed 120 pounds at 5' 6" (a normal healthy weight) it was never "right" and I finally realized it never will be ... for her..and I'm sick of hearing about it. I survived a stroke. I'm walking, I'm talking and functioning ....almost recovered ....feeling blessed and lucky, but let's all talk about my weight. GACK

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Jeez...I have a hard time fathoming her still talking about how you were sad at Christmas given the circumstances.  With your permission, I am willing to sincerely send your Mom major FUs!

I am genuinely sorry for your miscarriages - that is a loss that stays with us, and to me, a very private hurt that will be forever raw. 

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3 minutes ago, DeLurker said:

Jeez...I have a hard time fathoming her still talking about how you were sad at Christmas given the circumstances.  With your permission, I am willing to sincerely send your Mom major FUs!

I am genuinely sorry for your miscarriages - that is a loss that stays with us, and to me, a very private hurt that will be forever raw. 

Thank you for that. That is exactly how I feel. Strangers here are compassionate and understanding and it helps to read the words. . instead of ragging on me for not wanting to celebrate and decorate. Maybe one day I'll have the guts to say the FU but I've felt it.  Let's all pretend everything is fine unless it is something that bugs her then let's all suffer for years with the bitterness and grudges. I wish Icould just ignore it all.

It's not just me though  My aunt (my mother's older sister) bought the "wrong" flowers to put on my grandmother's grave so my mother threw a fit and then gave my aunt the silent treatment (my mother's favorite punishment for anyone who doesnt do the "right" thing) . Meanwhile my aunt had an aortic aneurysm and died. No lesson learned. I (and others) still get the silent treatment. Not speaking to her sister over FLOWERS. I just don't get it.

And "hard time fathoming" sums it up indeed.

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And Im very sure that my grandmother didn't care what kind of flowers were there. She's dead. And so is my aunt. But at least my mother got in her last silent treatment . That'll teach her. (my aunt) How dare she get the wrong flowers for a dead person.

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3 hours ago, MrsMoltisanti said:

Oh wow!  this is my sister in law - but it goes further than just food and gatherings.  It's like she wants me to "know" she is the best kid in her family so constantly tells me stuff she does for the family that my significant other does not.  However it is all self imposed stuff to make her look like a martyr.  She defines the rules then if people don't live up to them she calls them lacking.  For example, my SO's young adult son (age 23) got behind on his cell phone bill.  She pays it then blasts me with messages about how she had to pay his stuff because the father (my SO) doesn't care.   We are all like: hey, if we pay it then he doesn't learn....because this kid goes on and on, it's not just one thing, he constantly doesn't think things through and expects everyone to save him

Also, i stopped the family gatherings because she says no help is needed then storms around the kitchen for 2 hours while we sit awkwardly.  When we offer to help again -- nope, storming continues.  Then by the meal there is a huge cloud over her head and she has the attitude like we have abused her.  Needless to say the meal at that point is very undigestable because all I want to do is yell "Really?  Is this the dance you all do in your family and no one calls her out on it?"

 

Okay rant done :)

That brings to mind what my sister did to her son. He flunked out of college and she told him that "he cost HER a fortune sending him to college." She does her husband's bookkeeping for a whopping 3 employees. It's my brother-in-law who makes the money in his small business but she takes credit for that while saying if it weren't for her he wouldn't have anything.

People like that have to put other people down to prop themselves up.

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Major pet peeve -- having to take off my shoes when going through security at airport!!  I'm headed south for a few weeks and want to wear a pair of real cute flats on the plane.  However, I absolutely refuse to go barefoot when going through screening.  YUCK!  So I've found the thinnest pair of ankle socks in my drawer, but of course, they're gonna stretch out my flats, so I've gotta balance on one foot putting them on right before.  I know the second I'm done being scanned I can take 'em off, but what a g.d. hassle!!!  Really?  65 y.o. small blonde lady flying with her 3 grandchildren under the age of 12.    ARGHHHHH!  

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25 minutes ago, Maizie131 said:

Major pet peeve -- having to take off my shoes when going through security at airport!!  I'm headed south for a few weeks and want to wear a pair of real cute flats on the plane.  However, I absolutely refuse to go barefoot when going through screening.  YUCK!  So I've found the thinnest pair of ankle socks in my drawer, but of course, they're gonna stretch out my flats, so I've gotta balance on one foot putting them on right before.  I know the second I'm done being scanned I can take 'em off, but what a g.d. hassle!!!  Really?  65 y.o. small blonde lady flying with her 3 grandchildren under the age of 12.    ARGHHHHH!  

I don't know how cold it will be where you are when you leave and depending on the size of your carry-on bag, you can put some flip-flops in there and change them while sitting on a bench before you go through security because they don't make you take off flip-flops/sandals.

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Maizie, just buy a pair of the cheap little sockets they have in shoe stores for trying on shoes (hell, just pocket a pair the next time you're in DSW).   They won't stretch out your shoes, and your feet won't have to touch the grossness. 

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19 hours ago, DeLurker said:

In all honesty I don't think "many" people suck - really just a few do.  But they seem to be parsed out among everyone's family or social circle so they seem unavoidable.

Good point. They're like the people who drive 40-42 MPH (except in that one little passing zone area) on all the 55 MPH roads around my home.  It just takes one of them to impose their bullshit on everybody.

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On 2/7/2017 at 7:37 AM, ari333 said:

I love my mother bc she's mom, but she criticizes every little thing and then makes me feel guilty for getting angry or not wanting to be scrutinized to death. Off to the other thread. .....

Reading the last few pages of this topic reminds me that most people have one (or more) toxic people in their families. We can stay away from them, but we usually don't cut them off completely because they're our mothers/sisters/other relatives. But they can sure get under our skin, can't they?

 

Today's pet peeve (recycled): I'm going to complain once again about people asking for my name in restaurants and coffee shops. My real name isn't hard to pronounce. It's only two syllables, and it's phonetically spelled. And though it's not a common American name, it's been on TV, in movies, in rap songs, and my French and Haitian friends tell me it's very common in their cultures. Anyway, when I go to a Starbucks or a take-out restaurant, I always use the name "Josie," in hopes that people will a) know how to spell it, or at least 2) won't say "Whhaaatttt????????" when I give them my full name. But 99 times out 100, they will ask me how to spell "Josie." In truth, I don't care how you friggin spell it.' Write "Josey," "Joe-see," or "Jo C" on the cup, if that makes your day easier. I know these servers deal with hundreds of people all day, many of whom have strange names. But just write something. Just don't ask me how to spell "Josie."* 

*I know people complain about Starbucks servers messing up their names, and maybe that's why they ask me how to spell it. But I still have the right to be peeved about it, correct?

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13 minutes ago, topanga said:

But I still have the right to be peeved about it, correct?

People screwing up our names is definitely peeve territory, and I think you can lump this in with it.  Given that my first name is super common, and my last name would be a disaster for the average person calling out a name at a restaurant or Starbucks, I dumb it down to just Mack.  Works great.  Maybe you could dumb it down further for them to just Jo.  And if they ask you how to spell that, go with Jeaux just to be a pain in the ass.

My pet peeve today: When people use words or phrases or punctuation incorrectly or in a shitty way to the point that when I use them correctly I'm guilty by association. We talked about how I can't use the word bossy to describe my daughter, even though it's totally the right word sometimes. Another one is "Jumped the Shark" which has a very specific correct usage, but people fucked that one up by using it any time a show did something remotely dumb.  And I was reminded of this peeve when we were talking about the use of the ellipse in the family thread. 

Edited by JTMacc99
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1 hour ago, JTMacc99 said:

Maybe you could dumb it down further for them to just Jo.  And if they ask you how to spell that, go with Jeaux just to be a pain in the ass.

My pet peeve today: When people use words or phrases or punctuation incorrectly or in a shitty way to the point that when I use them correctly I'm guilty by association. We talked about how I can't use the word bossy to describe my daughter, even though it's totally the right word sometimes. Another one is "Jumped the Shark" which has a very specific correct usage, but people fucked that one up by using it any time a show did something remotely dumb.  And I was reminded of this peeve when we were talking about the use of the ellipse in the family thread. 

Ha! I love that suggestion. And yes, if someone asks me to spell it, Jeaux it is. Thanks JTMacc99.

And your pet peeve is spot on. When it comes to "Jumped The Shark," for example, many people don't understand that it refers to one specific moment when a TV show, well, jumped the shark, for lack of a better term. I sued to watch Scandal, but it quickly became unbelievable, poorly written, and really dumb. I can pinpoint the moment I stopped watching it, but people on the forums like to point out their personal "Jumped the Shark" moments. But you're right: by definition, if there are multiple reasons why a show became unrealistic or unwatchable for some viewers, then there is no "Jumped the Shark" moment.  On Happy Days, Fonzie jumped the shark once. Just once. 

And what does it say about me that I loved that episode? I'd watch it today if it came on TBS or TV Land. 

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Quote

My pet peeve today: When people use words or phrases or punctuation incorrectly or in a shitty way to the point that when I use them correctly I'm guilty by association.

I sent an email recently, confirming a meeting of 4 people.   "Thank you for agreeing to host.  I have confirmed Susan and Mary will attend with me."   I was so tempted to write "myself", because that is how so many people use that word, but I know it is wrong.  I went over and over it in my head before pressing "send".  It's "me", people.  "Me."  Very rarely is "myself" the correct word, but people think they sound more important if they have more syllables. 

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@TattleTeeny I don't remember where you live, but those of us in the San Antonio area have been dealing with a flu outbreak, which often then morphs into a bacterial sinus infection, leading to the disgusting and frustrating situation you just described. Sadly, I speak from experience on this one. And my pet peeve is getting an email notification about the flu outbreak and advising me to go get a flu shot asap because it takes 2 weeks for it to become effective, after both my daughter and I had gotten sick.

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Oh, thanks for the info, but I'm mostly OK--home from work but OK relatively. I'm an old pro at sinus infections and I think this is just a cold (with some minor sinus aches along for the ride). But, ugh, if those things aren't two of the most annoying symptoms in one. They don't even make sense together!

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I ended up taking about two and a half days off work. It wasn't bad enough that I would have gone to the doctor, but I already had a regular checkup scheduled and she noticed my hoarseness, etc., asked questions, and based on my having had chills, fever, and other symptoms indicative of a bacterial infection, then opted to prescribe some antibiotics, etc. I do feel better now and am working, but easily fatigued. And of course this is all going on when work is insanely busy.

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The last few posts reminded me of a pet peeve I've had since elementary school. The fact that so many people still think if someone doesn't have fever that they can't be that sick. I would get in arguments with the school nurse in elementary school over this and they would be hesitant to let me call my Mom or Nana to pick me up. I always had to tell whoever was in there what my Mom told me to say if it happened which was if they had an issue with me not having fever to discuss it with her or my Nana when they called to tell them I wasn't feeling well. I wasn't one who really faked sick so they knew if I was calling to come home due to not feeling good that it was for valid reasons. I had ear infections and strep a lot during those years and it was usually one of the two. Even now every so often some people who do the vital sign checks or a Dr. I've never seen will make a comment about not having fever. If I do have fever I'm usually ill to the point that it's really noticeable.

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6 hours ago, BookWoman56 said:

@TattleTeeny I don't remember where you live, but those of us in the San Antonio area have been dealing with a flu outbreak, which often then morphs into a bacterial sinus infection, leading to the disgusting and frustrating situation you just described. Sadly, I speak from experience on this one. And my pet peeve is getting an email notification about the flu outbreak and advising me to go get a flu shot asap because it takes 2 weeks for it to become effective, after both my daughter and I had gotten sick.

We have the exact same thing going around.  I was the last in my extended family to get it so I knew to go to the doctor ASAP.  And I never go to the doctor for a cold/flu.  I went to the doctor twice and it still lasted three and a half weeks.  It was awful.

Now it (or a mutation) is making a second round through the family.  I've seen this drill enough that I know the exact incubation period.  I should know Friday whether I'm going get this a second time.

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Regarding fever - my body temp usually runs a degree or two lower than "normal", so 37 or 98.6 is a fever for me. Forget trying to tell medical people that. Especially when I'm feeling like crap. What they consider a slight fever is a raging fever for me.

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5 minutes ago, riley702 said:

Regarding fever - my body temp usually runs a degree or two lower than "normal", so 37 or 98.6 is a fever for me. Forget trying to tell medical people that. Especially when I'm feeling like crap. What they consider a slight fever is a raging fever for me.

You should see if your doctor will take your temp at a regular check-up when you aren't sick and then write you a note saying what your normal temp is. I had a doctor do that for me for my blood pressure, which always goes up at the gynecologist's office. The nurse practitioner wouldn't believe me because "very few people have that." Yeah, and I'm one of them, lady. I take it at home, and it's fine. I can feel it rising on the way to the gynecologist's office. My general practitioner (or whatever they are called now) took it twice. It was high the first time, but dropped into normal by 30 minutes later. He offered to write a note on his prescription pad, so I have that now.

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I also have a standard temperature lower than average, but my doctor understands 98.6 isn't some universal rule (and my mother, who also has a lower resting temp, understood that when I was a child saying I didn't feel well enough to go to school [I liked school, other than the getting up early nightmare, so I wasn't prone to faking illness]) -- I have a fever if my temperature is elevated above my normal, period.

This takes me to an overall peeve: when people take something that is a general guideline -- e.g. 98.6 as a normal temperature, XX-XX as a lab's range of normal for various values in blood tests, pooping once a day as "regular" -- and turn it into a bright-line rule, not allowing for the fact individuals can be a little above or below with that being a perfectly healthy norm for them, and thus the important part is looking for changes as compared to their norm, not deviations from the average/standard.

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@Bastet  I will admit to taking slight advantage of people's tendency to regard temperature guidelines as absolute rules. When I was still in school, my temperature always tended to be above the norm. I could always go into the nurse's office or front office, get someone to take my temp, and immediately be issued a get-out-of-school-free card based on them thinking that I was running an actual fever. However, I enjoyed school and so mostly used that ploy during weeks when we were having end-of-term tests, with one major test a day and not a damn thing going on in other classes because they were giving us study time. So, I would take my test for that day, go to the office, and then go home so I could study in a more comfortable setting. I wish I felt more guilty that the office staff would frequently compliment me for being so dedicated to school that I would take my test even when I was sick, and I never bothered to correct them. 

  • Love 3
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OK, call me a bitch.  Really. It's early in the morning, you might be the first one today, but probably not the last.

I stumbled upon a video yesterday of a little boy, about 4, who was finishing chemo and going through the ritual of ringing the bell.   Hospital staff was gathered around cheering, he was jumping up and down, cheering and dancing while ringing the bell.   And his mother and father sat there, both recording the entire event on their phones.  WTF? They weren't jumping up and down with him, hugging him or each other.  They were recording it.   I guess I understand the desire to record the event (although I'm one of those people who would rather experience something than watch it through the lens of my camera), but there were dozens of other people who could have recorded it for them.  Put down your damned phones and hug your kid.  

  • Love 15
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I've come to the conclusion that people are too stupid to own smartphones. I think we need to scale back the technology to the era when texting was extremely tedious due to the lack of a keyboard. I cannot tell you how many times tonight I was cut off to the point that it nearly caused an accident or how many people nearly side-swiped me because they were talking, texting, video-chatting on the phone and not even looking at the road.At all.  And these are people driving on the highway. What the hell is important that you can't pull off the road to have your conversation? Or that it can't wait till you get to your destination?  It seems like everybody is always on their phone one way or the other, all the time. What kind of life is that?  Put down the phone, jeezus.

South FL peeve: I just found out that the girl behind that stupid "Cash me Outside" meme is native to the area.  Because of course she is.  Heaven forbid FL be represented by anything other than low-class,trashy people in mainstream media. Ugh.

  • Love 7
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Replying late to the what to bring or not to a party dilemma: ages ago, my best friend, who knew that (back then) I hardly ever cooked, tasked me with bringing a cheese platter to her new year eve party. That turned out to be super easy for me and the mix I chose had great success, so when going to a party where there will be enough cheese lovers, that became my "specialty". Otherwise, I'm the green salad person. Mix of classic lettuces, plus various sprouts, thinly sliced radish, alfalfa, green asparagus and anything else that catches my eye that day, plus I do mean vinaigrettes, sometimes even two to choose from. No cooking needed, fun, and always successful, what more to ask :)   

  • Love 4
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19 hours ago, Quof said:

OK, call me a bitch.  Really. It's early in the morning, you might be the first one today, but probably not the last.

I stumbled upon a video yesterday of a little boy, about 4, who was finishing chemo and going through the ritual of ringing the bell.   Hospital staff was gathered around cheering, he was jumping up and down, cheering and dancing while ringing the bell.   And his mother and father sat there, both recording the entire event on their phones.  WTF? They weren't jumping up and down with him, hugging him or each other.  They were recording it.   I guess I understand the desire to record the event (although I'm one of those people who would rather experience something than watch it through the lens of my camera), but there were dozens of other people who could have recorded it for them.  Put down your damned phones and hug your kid.  

Well, if you're a bitch, then so am I.  I had the same reaction.   Videos like that make me wonder if it happened by itself, or if the kid was being directed to act that way for the purpose of making a video.  And having the video camera at the ready changes the way kids act - they sometimes act FOR the camera.   I do think that a lot of parents miss moments with their kids because they're recording the kids instead of BEING THERE.  And some parents are disappointed when the kids aren't acting over-the-top, so they push them to "act"  for the camera. 

An example of what I mean - I was at a one year old's birthday party recently.  You know how some babies, while trying to eat cake, will end up smearing cake on their face and hair?  Well, this baby wasn't interested in being messy.  But the parents were intent on getting a photo of him with cake all over.  So, instead of taking photos/video of THIS child acting the way HE acts, they decided to push the issue.  They encouraged him to smear cake and frosting, because they wanted a photo of the kid with frosting on his face and in his hair - to post on facebook, I assume.  But he didn't do it.  So the parents pushed the process along, smearing frosting on his face, a little in his hair, so they could get the "messy birthday cake"  photo.  The kid started screaming - had a huge meltdown. He wanted to eat cake HIS way, I guess.   So, not only did they not get the photo they wanted -  they also missed out on the  experience of the baby's first birthday cake by making it about the photo they wanted instead of the BABY. 

It's cool to have photos or video - but the photos should be a recording of the event, and not become the event itself. 

  • Love 13
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8 hours ago, AgentRXS said:

South FL peeve: I just found out that the girl behind that stupid "Cash me Outside" meme is native to the area.  Because of course she is.  Heaven forbid FL be represented by anything other than low-class,trashy people in mainstream media. Ugh.

You need to just embrace the essence of the Florida population - they are wonderfully diverse in their crazy!  Proof needed:  Florida Man twitter.

And any day you survive driving in South Florida is a good day.  I know smart phones increase distracted driving, but even before cell phone technology was around, South Florida had drunk drivers, stoned drivers, blue haired drivers (who could barely see over the steering wheel - most notably in Hallandale), drivers who learned to drive in countries where lanes don't matter....

When I was growing up there, my Dad would always assume a bad driver we saw was "high on something".  It later changed to "probably on his damn cellphone". 

  • Love 2
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I was in Shanghai last week. At one restaurant I had lunch at, the parents were playing with their kid and talking to him the whole time. And there was not a phone in sight, for the whole lunch. It's both great and sad enough that my party commented on how nice and uncommon that was. 

That should be the norm, people, not the exception!

And you, anonymous parents in that (very good) Shanghai restaurant, if you by any chance read this, please know that you rock, as parents and in your food choices (I had my eye on your table, your ordered all my favs plus a few I wish I had ordered). Please keep remembering this fun time and how in the grand scheme of things work is way, way, below... 

  • Love 8
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9 hours ago, bubbls said:

Today's pet peeve: One semi gets in the left lane to pass another but doesn't step on the gas to get on out of the way then neither moves due to going up and down hills. Meanwhile I fume. 

I hate that!  And what usually happens, I'm coming up to pass them, and one guy will pull out, cutting me off so I have to jump on the brakes to keep from running into him, because he can't wait the 3.2 seconds it will take for me to pass.

  • Love 3
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7 hours ago, backformore said:

Well, if you're a bitch, then so am I.  I had the same reaction.   Videos like that make me wonder if it happened by itself, or if the kid was being directed to act that way for the purpose of making a video.  And having the video camera at the ready changes the way kids act - they sometimes act FOR the camera.   I do think that a lot of parents miss moments with their kids because they're recording the kids instead of BEING THERE.  And some parents are disappointed when the kids aren't acting over-the-top, so they push them to "act"  for the camera. 

An example of what I mean - I was at a one year old's birthday party recently.  You know how some babies, while trying to eat cake, will end up smearing cake on their face and hair?  Well, this baby wasn't interested in being messy.  But the parents were intent on getting a photo of him with cake all over.  So, instead of taking photos/video of THIS child acting the way HE acts, they decided to push the issue.  They encouraged him to smear cake and frosting, because they wanted a photo of the kid with frosting on his face and in his hair - to post on facebook, I assume.  But he didn't do it.  So the parents pushed the process along, smearing frosting on his face, a little in his hair, so they could get the "messy birthday cake"  photo.  The kid started screaming - had a huge meltdown. He wanted to eat cake HIS way, I guess.   So, not only did they not get the photo they wanted -  they also missed out on the  experience of the baby's first birthday cake by making it about the photo they wanted instead of the BABY. 

It's cool to have photos or video - but the photos should be a recording of the event, and not become the event itself. 

Totally agree! In fact ,one should keep in mind whenever one sees 'reality' shows or even those vlogs on that website that rhymes with Threw Lube that folks will turn themselves 'on' whenever a camera is put in their face as opposed to be acting naturally - even the tinest babies.

  • Love 1
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12 hours ago, AgentRXS said:

I've come to the conclusion that people are too stupid to own smartphones. I think we need to scale back the technology to the era when texting was extremely tedious due to the lack of a keyboard. I cannot tell you how many times tonight I was cut off to the point that it nearly caused an accident or how many people nearly side-swiped me because they were talking, texting, video-chatting on the phone and not even looking at the road.At all.  And these are people driving on the highway. What the hell is important that you can't pull off the road to have your conversation? Or that it can't wait till you get to your destination?  It seems like everybody is always on their phone one way or the other, all the time. What kind of life is that?  Put down the phone, jeezus.

I once saw someone eating while driving with a plate in their lap while holding a fork. And they kept picking up the plate while holding the fork, so there were many times they didn't have either hand on the steering wheel. I was freaking out, and kept thinking, "they're going to cause a massive accident."

10 hours ago, backformore said:

An example of what I mean - I was at a one year old's birthday party recently.  You know how some babies, while trying to eat cake, will end up smearing cake on their face and hair?  Well, this baby wasn't interested in being messy.  But the parents were intent on getting a photo of him with cake all over.  So, instead of taking photos/video of THIS child acting the way HE acts, they decided to push the issue.  They encouraged him to smear cake and frosting, because they wanted a photo of the kid with frosting on his face and in his hair - to post on facebook, I assume.  But he didn't do it.  So the parents pushed the process along, smearing frosting on his face, a little in his hair, so they could get the "messy birthday cake"  photo.  The kid started screaming - had a huge meltdown. He wanted to eat cake HIS way, I guess.   So, not only did they not get the photo they wanted -  they also missed out on the  experience of the baby's first birthday cake by making it about the photo they wanted instead of the BABY.

So this is what it would have been like if Facebook was around for my first birthday. My mother told me how she and all the other adults kept trying to get me to stick my hand in the cake, and when I finally did, I cried because my hand was dirty. There is also a photo of her trying to put a party hat on my head, but I kept putting up my hands to stop her. Every time she tells this story, she calls me an "evil baby", but in the other photos when I'm just being myself I look pretty happy.

  • Love 6
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