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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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59 minutes ago, Katy M said:

I'm sorry that I can't remember the specific thing, but I remember I was watching Young Sheldon and Sheldon made a grammatical error while speaking (I think it was an I/me thing, but I'm not even sure of that).  I was like, come on, Sheldon wouldn't say that.

If it was "I" for me, I think young Sheldon would have made that mistake (because he thought it sounded more educated).
But did the writer intend it that way? *sigh*
Grownup Sheldon would know better.

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4 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

I remember a teacher advising us to remove the other person's name as a test: The company gave my husband and I a few samples to preview. Remove my husband and.  

That's what I was taught as well. 

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I was of two minds as to where to post this, but since the majority would go under Peeves, I'm posting it here. 

Let me preface this by saying that I've never flown on Air France. So I don't know what their service is actually like. But this is the second time that this has happened.

My parents left to return to India on Wednesday. Or were supposed to. Due to the storm, rain, thunder, lightning, their flight, which was scheduled to leave from Dulles IAD at 6:00 pm, was delayed until 9. Then further delayed till 10. I think my parents had my phone number to receive updates--and I was receiving the texts. It's weird. Delta/KLM/Air France are bundled together or something. I don't know. And frankly, I don't give a damn right now.

And I thought: well, they're going to miss their connection in Paris to New Delhi with this three hour delay. Because the layover in Paris was for three hours. Originally they were going to arrive at 7:30 am, and their flight was at 10:30.

But nope. Flight finally left at 9:40. And while they were in the air, I got texts from Air France, letting me know that they had to rebook their connections from Paris. First, they split my parents up, putting them on two different airlines. Mom on Air India, and Dad on Virgin. But first, both were put on a flight to London, which would have arrived at 6:30ish p.m. Then Mom's flight would take her to Delhi at 10:00, while Dad's would leave at 9:40!

See, I didn't realize they'd been split up. I couldn't understand the two different texts with two different departures.  I called Mom's friend, the travel agent who'd booked this and she informed me what they'd done. So I got on the phone with Air France, and I spoke to a very nice guy who put my dad on the flight with Mom on Air India. But he had to go to the desk to request his ticket be reissued. Since they were in the air, an all that. Plus, Dad had left his insulin pen behind! So I told him to make sure he asked for medical staff to give him something so he'd be okay.

So I thought, okay. Everything is fine now. Never mind the fact that I don't understand why Air France couldn't just book them on another Air France airline flight! All this maneuvering and rebooking made no sense to me. The last time they did this was over 15 years ago, cancelling my aunt's (Dad's sister who had come from India to visit) flight--for us to learn this when we got to the airport, for no reason. My Dad pitched a fit, and then they put her on a KLM flight home.

BUT. While my parents, exhausted, are waiting for their flight home--he got his new boarding pass with no issues--Air India suddenly, two hours before boarding, announces the flight is delayed. They've been in Paris for 12 hours now. Well at CDG Airport. Then 10 minutes after Mom told me the flight was delayed, they cancelled it. They're told a half hour later it was due to "Technical Issues" which, okay. Better to fly when the plane is in fine working order. So, they tell the domestic passengers to go home; put up the international ones in a hotel. And tell them to come back tomorrow...NIGHT.

I don't understand why they couldn't put them on the next flight that went in the morning. After all, their original ticket had them leaving at 10:30! But nope. No explanation. I'm stressed because I know my parents are tired and stressed, and that doesn't help me, because I'm not there. I'm calling them every 15 minutes to see how they're doing.

And on top of that, one of their suitcases is missing. Do NOT get me started on how they came with four and left with 7 this trip. Maybe someone else took it? Whatever. Here's hoping it shows up in Delhi...TOMORROW. Yes, my parents have been traveling for TWO days now.

They're scheduled on another Air India (why???) flight to New Delhi at 10:00 pm tonight. So they have about five more hours before they leave. I hope.

I've NEVER had this issue with any of the airlines I've flown on; but this cancelling, rebooking on a DIFFERENT airline, seems to be something Air France does. Regularly. IF I ever get to France, I know I won't be going their by Air France.

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On 8/4/2019 at 6:06 PM, MikaelaArsenault said:

The back to school ads when it’s way too early for this.

The schools in my area started this week (different cities, different days).  This is way too early.  In my day (as I rock on the porch, shaking my cane at the kiddies, ha ha!) we didn't go back to school until after Labor Day (of course, we went way into the first part of June, if I recall, and schools get out here sometime in May now).  

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38 minutes ago, BooksRule said:

The schools in my area started this week (different cities, different days).  This is way too early.  In my day (as I rock on the porch, shaking my cane at the kiddies, ha ha!) we didn't go back to school until after Labor Day (of course, we went way into the first part of June, if I recall, and schools get out here sometime in May now).  

At some point they switched to shorter summers and more breaks during the year.

What I find baffling is the resulting traffic.  Those of us without kids can tell when school gets out for the summer and starts again.   It goes from zero traffic to gridlock.

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47 minutes ago, BooksRule said:

The schools in my area started this week (different cities, different days).  This is way too early.  In my day (as I rock on the porch, shaking my cane at the kiddies, ha ha!) we didn't go back to school until after Labor Day (of course, we went way into the first part of June, if I recall, and schools get out here sometime in May now).  

When I was in school (70s and 80s) we started a few days before Labor Day and went into the second week of June.  That's still what they do here.  My niece and nephew go to school in the south and I think they're starting soon.

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12 minutes ago, Katy M said:

My niece and nephew go to school in the south and I think they're starting soon.

I'm in the South, and at least the schools are air-conditioned.  I'm not sure if there was A/C in the schools when I started elementary school (would have been in the mid-sixties), but it would have been unbearable here in this hot, humid climate without it.  I'm showing my ignorance here.  Are schools in the northern states (and maybe the northwest) air-conditioned?  I know a lot of people don't have A/C at home (although if you don't have a lot of really hot weather, you probably don't need it).  Of course, here we don't have to use whatever heating system we have very much in the winter, since we don't have a lot of really cold weather here.

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I live in Iowa and I don't remember our classrooms being air conditioned, no. The office area of the school was, but I think that was about it. Usually if it got hot as the day went on, they'd just let us out early. I remember doing that many times within the first week or so of going back to school. 

Kinda begs the question of why they even had us start back in August, then, instead of waiting until September. And of course, we had dress codes regarding shorts and T-shirts/tank tops, so we were restricted in the kinds of cooler clothes we could wear as well. 

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10 hours ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

I was of two minds as to where to post this, but since the majority would go under Peeves, I'm posting it here. 

Let me preface this by saying that I've never flown on Air France. So I don't know what their service is actually like. But this is the second time that this has happened.

My parents left to return to India on Wednesday. Or were supposed to. Due to the storm, rain, thunder, lightning, their flight, which was scheduled to leave from Dulles IAD at 6:00 pm, was delayed until 9. Then further delayed till 10. I think my parents had my phone number to receive updates--and I was receiving the texts. It's weird. Delta/KLM/Air France are bundled together or something. I don't know. And frankly, I don't give a damn right now.

And I thought: well, they're going to miss their connection in Paris to New Delhi with this three hour delay. Because the layover in Paris was for three hours. Originally they were going to arrive at 7:30 am, and their flight was at 10:30.

But nope. Flight finally left at 9:40. And while they were in the air, I got texts from Air France, letting me know that they had to rebook their connections from Paris. First, they split my parents up, putting them on two different airlines. Mom on Air India, and Dad on Virgin. But first, both were put on a flight to London, which would have arrived at 6:30ish p.m. Then Mom's flight would take her to Delhi at 10:00, while Dad's would leave at 9:40!

See, I didn't realize they'd been split up. I couldn't understand the two different texts with two different departures.  I called Mom's friend, the travel agent who'd booked this and she informed me what they'd done. So I got on the phone with Air France, and I spoke to a very nice guy who put my dad on the flight with Mom on Air India. But he had to go to the desk to request his ticket be reissued. Since they were in the air, an all that. Plus, Dad had left his insulin pen behind! So I told him to make sure he asked for medical staff to give him something so he'd be okay.

So I thought, okay. Everything is fine now. Never mind the fact that I don't understand why Air France couldn't just book them on another Air France airline flight! All this maneuvering and rebooking made no sense to me. The last time they did this was over 15 years ago, cancelling my aunt's (Dad's sister who had come from India to visit) flight--for us to learn this when we got to the airport, for no reason. My Dad pitched a fit, and then they put her on a KLM flight home.

BUT. While my parents, exhausted, are waiting for their flight home--he got his new boarding pass with no issues--Air India suddenly, two hours before boarding, announces the flight is delayed. They've been in Paris for 12 hours now. Well at CDG Airport. Then 10 minutes after Mom told me the flight was delayed, they cancelled it. They're told a half hour later it was due to "Technical Issues" which, okay. Better to fly when the plane is in fine working order. So, they tell the domestic passengers to go home; put up the international ones in a hotel. And tell them to come back tomorrow...NIGHT.

I don't understand why they couldn't put them on the next flight that went in the morning. After all, their original ticket had them leaving at 10:30! But nope. No explanation. I'm stressed because I know my parents are tired and stressed, and that doesn't help me, because I'm not there. I'm calling them every 15 minutes to see how they're doing.

And on top of that, one of their suitcases is missing. Do NOT get me started on how they came with four and left with 7 this trip. Maybe someone else took it? Whatever. Here's hoping it shows up in Delhi...TOMORROW. Yes, my parents have been traveling for TWO days now.

They're scheduled on another Air India (why???) flight to New Delhi at 10:00 pm tonight. So they have about five more hours before they leave. I hope.

I've NEVER had this issue with any of the airlines I've flown on; but this cancelling, rebooking on a DIFFERENT airline, seems to be something Air France does. Regularly. IF I ever get to France, I know I won't be going their by Air France.

Damn...  someone has to invent teleportation - and now!  Traveling sucks. 

All the best to your parents!!

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1 minute ago, ebk57 said:

Damn...  someone has to invent teleportation - and now!  Traveling sucks. 

All the best to your parents!!

Seriously.

My dad sent me a text that they were finally boarding--at 12:45! That's past midnight. Unless there was a time delay. Flight was supposed to leave at 10:00. But they're on their way and they should be arriving in Delhi in about two hours. I hope. And I'm hoping the missing suitcase will be there in baggage claim.

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When I was a kid, the school year was divided into six 6-week grading periods.  We started school early enough in the fall (mid-August) so that we'd finish the first three grading periods before the winter break, and then the second three after.  I can remember only one year we were still in school in June, and that was because we had a lot of snow days.

9 hours ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

And I'm hoping the missing suitcase will be there in baggage claim.

If it isn't, they should go to the airline or baggage office in the airport and file a claim for it.  That office is generally near the baggage claim area -- or an airline/airport official should be able to direct them.  I had a suitcase take the scenic route once -- I have no idea how it travelled, but it wasn't on the flight I was on! -- but the airline found it and brought it to my house later.

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6 hours ago, Browncoat said:

I had a suitcase take the scenic route once -- I have no idea how it travelled, but it wasn't on the flight I was on! -- but the airline found it and brought it to my house later.

I don't check baggage, but when I was a kid we did -- my mom packed all our stuff in one giant suitcase, and then I think there was a tote bag, too.  Anyway, only once did it go on a different journey than we did, and thankfully it was our return flight, so we simply woke up the next morning to it being delivered to our doorstep.

I think airlines in general do a pretty good job with checked luggage, considering the number of wayward pieces versus the daily volume, but I still opt to carry on.  I travel light, so I use the same roll-on bag whether I'm going for a week or a month, and that way I don't have to spare the extra time to wait at baggage claim (not that it's terribly long, but once I arrive I'm quite impatient to get the hell out of a crowded airport). 

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7 hours ago, Browncoat said:

If it isn't, they should go to the airline or baggage office in the airport and file a claim for it.  That office is generally near the baggage claim area -- or an airline/airport official should be able to direct them.  I had a suitcase take the scenic route once -- I have no idea how it travelled, but it wasn't on the flight I was on! -- but the airline found it and brought it to my house later.

Oh, they did. In all the years of traveling, they’ve never had luggage lost.

They made it home at 8:30pm India time today. Customs in Paris confiscated the small digital luggage scale for...reasons.

My parents, on top of being exhausted, are pissed. My dad did say they may have located the missing suitcase, and that the airport would send it to Jaipur, which is where my parents live.

I told my dad the next time they visit, to fly Lufthansa. I’ve never had any issues when using them. Or Delta, which I flew when I went to visit them six years ago.

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I usually don't check a suitcase, and almost never when I'm flying to my destination.  I sometimes will check one on the way home though, when I'm more tired (jet lag, etc) and don't feel like hefting it into the overhead compartment.  I once went to Scotland for three weeks with a carry-on and a personal bag, and, more recently, to Antarctica for two weeks with the same carry-on and personal bag.  Mind you, I did have to carry the parka (no way it would fit in my suitcase!), but I made good use of its pockets.

My peeve would be people who try to cram an obviously over-large bag into the overhead bin.  Only once have I been on a flight where the gate keepers actually made people put their bags in the little sizing thing by the gate -- more than half who were trying to pass their giant bags off as carry-ons had to gate check them.  My bag is awesome.  The gatekeepers could tell at a glance it would fit with room left over.

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Several Xmases ago we were on a small commuter jet and watched a woman working hard to jam her carry-on into the overhead bin. This was going on for at least 10 minutes when she said to another woman (who was trying to help her), "It's a sewing machine". 

I've never seen anyone place a carry-on in one of those measuring things.

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20 hours ago, Bastet said:

I don't check baggage, but when I was a kid we did -- my mom packed all our stuff in one giant suitcase, and then I think there was a tote bag, too.  Anyway, only once did it go on a different journey than we did, and thankfully it was our return flight, so we simply woke up the next morning to it being delivered to our doorstep.

I think airlines in general do a pretty good job with checked luggage, considering the number of wayward pieces versus the daily volume, but I still opt to carry on.  I travel light, so I use the same roll-on bag whether I'm going for a week or a month, and that way I don't have to spare the extra time to wait at baggage claim (not that it's terribly long, but once I arrive I'm quite impatient to get the hell out of a crowded airport). 

I agree...I think the airlines do a great job considering the volume.  I don't believe one airline over another is any better in terms of lost bags. 

One time my husband and son were meeting up in a different country (Czech Republic).  My husband was taking quite a few items for my son, and he did check the bag due to size and an international flight.  The bag was mistakenly stickered with someone else's barcode tag during check-in, and ended up in China.  LOL!  He figured it out when it didn't show up after his flight and he looked at his bag stickers and noticed a name that was not his!  The airline (United) did a fantastic job of locating the bag, and redirecting it to him, and he did receive it a day and half later.

We do a TON of traveling, and my husband travels every week for work.  We very rarely check bags anymore, now that we are often traveling as just a couple (no small children), and I've really streamlined my packing.  Everyone is different obviously, but not only do I not want to drag around a bigger suitcase, I found that I just wasn't using all the stuff I once thought was "necessary".  We often do impulsive weekend trips, and I will literally grab a few things and go...I've never felt I needed something that I didn't have.

Edited by Kelly
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I've gotten better about taking too much stuff.  Having a smaller bag helps, but I still end up overpacking.  Usually shoes.  I apparently am unable to travel without three pairs of shoes.  The one time I took only two (packed one and wore one), I ended up buying a pair. 

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We often do impulsive weekend trips, and I will literally grab a few things and go...I've never felt I needed something that I didn't have.

My mantra is that if it does happen that we forget something or suddenly decide we need something we didn't pack, chances are there'll be a Walmart or Walgreens nearby.

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Peeve: Trying to watch a movie and the person that you are watching it with is constantly annoying me by saying this reminds me of such and such. Over and over again. I missed half the dialogue. Not happy. Then when I mentioned this to them they are mad at me for not being there for them. Hey. I’m here for you, but the movies is not the time to tell me all the little life stories that you have. 

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My luggage related peeve is I bought a bag that called itself a carry-on but it's too big the 757 which is the popular body style for the route I fly. The only flight I haven't had to gate-check it was on a giant trans-continental plane I took from ATL to LAX. It was a 3 4 3 configuration with giant overhead bins.

During the summer I cand pack what I need for a 4 day trip into my smaller carry-on, and I'm sure I could during the winter but my mom likes to send me home with goodies (mostly food) and it's a stretch.

I too cannot travel without 3 pairs of shoes and 1 pair of flip flops. I probably could if I didn't spend a few days with a buddy to takes his dogs on 2 mile walks twice a day and my Converse just don't cut it for that distance.

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Well the missing suitcase showed up. However. some items were stolen from another suitcase! It's not a question of my mom trying to sneak in something that's not allowed. She bought six of these items, but one was missing. Now if they'd been able to go through customs at Paris, instead off being shuffled of to the hotel, with the luggage to follow, maybe the employee wouldn't have been able to steal it.

But. I'm just glad that they're home, and that all the luggage with them.

Edited by GHScorpiosRule
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On 8/11/2019 at 8:03 PM, Mindthinkr said:

Peeve: Trying to watch a movie and the person that you are watching it with is constantly annoying me by saying this reminds me of such and such. Over and over again. I missed half the dialogue. Not happy. Then when I mentioned this to them they are mad at me for not being there for them. Hey. I’m here for you, but the movies is not the time to tell me all the little life stories that you have. 

Oh god YES!!! I don’t understand folks who can’t shutup at movies either. You can make a quick low comment here and there, but it’s okay to simply enjoy one another’s company *while* watching a flick...yet some people don’t get this at all.

I used to go to the movies with this former friend who would look over at me every time there was a funny moment...like literally cackle while constantly turning to stare at me, like she was making sure I was laughing and enjoying myself too. It was creepy and annoying...I think she got the hint when I finally quit accepting her movie invites. I always preferred seeing movies alone anyway, so no big loss there.

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This is making me tear up, so apologies.  My pet peeve today is "keeping things for best."  So I just took my mom's engagement ring out of its original box, from the drawer.  It's now on my finger, and will stay there.

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On August 12, 2019 at 1:22 PM, theredhead77 said:

My luggage related peeve is I bought a bag that called itself a carry-on but it's too big the 757 which is the popular body style for the route I fly. The only flight I haven't had to gate-check it was on a giant trans-continental plane I took from ATL to LAX. It was a 3 4 3 configuration with giant overhead bins.

I have the opposite peeve. On the bigger, longer distance planes, when they ask for volunteers to check their carry-on bags for free (which I would love to do so I don't have to drag it to the restroom with me before boarding) I cannot, because I'm no longer strong enough to get it off of the carousel at O'Hare, and it's easier to ask someone on the plane to lift it into the overhead (it's not that heavy).

But on the smaller planes, they offer to put it into a compartment in the belly of the plane and hand it to you as you deplane, which is great (even though it doesn't solve the issue of not being able to leave your bag unattended while peeing before flying).

Hmmm. I think I just talked myself into getting a ticket with a stopover for Thanksgiving with smaller planes.
  
  
  

3 hours ago, Brookside said:

This is making me tear up, so apologies.  My pet peeve today is "keeping things for best."  So I just took my mom's engagement ring out of its original box, from the drawer.  It's now on my finger, and will stay there.

I was going to wear my mom's wedding ring to my daughter's wedding last weekend but didn't because of a day trip with her sister on the way there. I'm sad that I didn't, but I didn't want to risk losing it. But I should have. 😟

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10 hours ago, Browncoat said:

I do hate having to lug all my bags to the restroom when I’m travelling alone.  But I’d still rather do that than check a bag.

Same. At least most of the major airports have made the bathroom stalls bigger than they used to be. 

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Oh now I've heard EVERYTHING.

Bad enough that customs in Paris stole from my parents. I just learned that while they were trying to figure out when their next flight would be, from the AIR INDIA desk, my mother was talked down to, and told to "learn to speak FRENCH."

Now, if someone is going to move to a foreign country, I understand and do believe they should learn to speak the main language spoken there. But this was an INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT. Where passengers aren't REQUIRED to KNOW French. That got my mother's goat. And since the person at the desk was Indian, she snapped right back, you need to learn to speak Hindi! Of course my mother said it in English. But she and my dad had been traveling for nearly 24 hours.

I just...have no words. Is this what traveling has come down to these days? That if you need service, or questions answered, you have to speak, fluently, the language of the country the airport you're at?

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9 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

What is wrong with people?!?!?? How does that person have a job?

It's Paris.  It's probably part of the job description.

Now, I have to say that the overwhelming majority of people I encountered in France - yes, even in Paris - were not at all rude about language (generally, I'd make an effort, we'd both laugh at how bad my French was, and quickly agree it was easier if we both switched to English).  But I've also heard first-hand stories from people for whom the stereotype proved true, so I'll go ahead and make the clichéd joke anyway.

It's just utterly ridiculous here, though.  It's an international airport; there are people just passing through on layover from all over the world!

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17 minutes ago, Bastet said:

It's Paris.  It's probably part of the job description.

Now, I have to say that the overwhelming majority of people I encountered in France - yes, even in Paris - were not at all rude about language (generally, I'd make an effort, we'd both laugh at how bad my French was, and quickly agree it was easier if we both switched to English).  But I've also heard first-hand stories from people for whom the stereotype proved true, so I'll go ahead and make the clichéd joke anyway.

It's just utterly ridiculous here, though.  It's an international airport; there are people just passing through on layover from all over the world!

I'm wondering if those that you've heard the stories from at least made an attempt.  I also didn't encounter any language snobs in France, but when I would ask a question in French, I would receive an answer in English, because it was pretty darned obvious my French sucked.  At the same time, though, I think they appreciated that I tried.  And our cab driver helped me practice.  He was so nice.

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1 hour ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

Bad enough that customs in Paris stole from my parents. I just learned that while they were trying to figure out when their next flight would be, from the AIR INDIA desk, my mother was talked down to, and told to "learn to speak FRENCH."

WTF? It would make more sense (still be rude as hell) if this had been an airport in the US and somebody had told a passenger to learn to speak English, given that the US is pretty large and generally not known for being fluent in more than one language. But for an airport in Europe, where you're going to have passengers from all over Europe (not to mention other continents) and for whom quite possibly the only language many of them might have in common is English, it makes zero sense whatsoever for an airline employee to tell a passenger to learn French. I'm not in any way an expert on language use in Europe, but I follow a few bands from different parts of Europe, and almost all of them use lyrics in English, because that's the language that their German, French, Italian, etc., fans can all understand. Finally, despite whatever the predominant language might be in any country, if you have an international airport,  you should expect to encounter international travelers, many of whom will not speak the local language. Hire multilingual staff and FFS train them to treat customers politely.  

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6 minutes ago, BookWoman56 said:
1 hour ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

Bad enough that customs in Paris stole from my parents. I just learned that while they were trying to figure out when their next flight would be, from the AIR INDIA desk, my mother was talked down to, and told to "learn to speak FRENCH."

WTF?

Thinking of a former coworker who was rude to the public for over 20 years before she was fired, maybe the rude employee at Air India had a substance abuse problem combined with a bad, ineffective boss.

I hope your parents, @GHScorpiosRuleare able to realize that they are not in any way at fault in this situation. And feel free to tell them that there are a bunch of folks on social media who are indignant on their behalf.

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11 minutes ago, BookWoman56 said:

WTF? It would make more sense (still be rude as hell) if this had been an airport in the US and somebody had told a passenger to learn to speak English, given that the US is pretty large and generally not known for being fluent in more than one language. But for an airport in Europe, where you're going to have passengers from all over Europe (not to mention other continents) and for whom quite possibly the only language many of them might have in common is English, it makes zero sense whatsoever for an airline employee to tell a passenger to learn French. 

France is not the same as the rest of Europe.  We used to have an office in France and my coworkers from there used to tell me that even people who interacted with tourists, such as cabs, airports, and hotels, will often pretend not to speak English even when they do.

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I'm extremely angry with the company that handles the flexible spending account service for my employer. Long story short, they emailed me a few months ago that I had roughly $250 left in my 2018 flexible spending account, and I needed to use it by a certain date in April or forfeit it. The email made no  mention of any restrictions on payment types, and even said the money could be used for qualifying expenses incurred during the first 2-3 months in 2019. As it happened, I still had a balance on a hospital bill from late 2018, so I used my FSA Visa card to pay the hospital bill, being careful to pay the exact amount that was in the 2018 account. 

First of all, it took them close to 2 months to process the claim, and they notified me I needed to submit a receipt (typically an Explanation of Benefits statement from my insurance, which would include all the required information). I did that. Then they notified me they'd rejected the receipt, and almost immediately after that notified me that my FSA card had been suspended. I called their customer service, only to be told that it was rejected because the bill was from 2018, and the FSA card was suspended because I'd used it for an expense during the preceding year. Further discussion took place, I escalated to a supervisor, and was informed that "Yes, we did send you that email telling you to use your remaining 2018 funds, but if you wanted to do that, you shouldn't have used your FSA card and instead have just used our option to pay your provider directly or to pay the bill yourself and then get us to reimburse you. Per the IRS rules, blah blah blah." I read the original email to the supervisor, pointing out to her that nowhere in the email did it specify that I couldn't use the FSA card and that in fact it urged me to use those funds asap. Asked her shouldn't they have notified me if there were limitations on how I could use those funds, specifically that I couldn't use the FSA card. And...crickets. Her response was that if I wanted to get my card reactivated, I need to submit receipts for the $250 in qualified expenses for this year, or else send them a check for the $250. And until I do so, the remaining balance I have in the FSA for 2019 isn't accessible. 

As soon as I have a little bit of free time, I'm going to contact my HR department to complain about this and see if I can get it resolved. If not, I'll have to pay $250 out of pocket so I don't lose the remaining $1200 or so in this year's account. But next year, there's no way in hell I will put a dime into a flexible spending account that is run by this same company. 

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19 minutes ago, BookWoman56 said:

But next year, there's no way in hell I will put a dime into a flexible spending account that is run by this same company. 

My company used to give a FSA match to get people to sign up.  Once they got people used to signing up, they stopped matching.  Once they did that I stopped contributing because it started getting too complicated with too many restrictions on top of the use it or lose it rules.  My expenses weren't big or repeatable enough to deal with the hassle of it.  I kept getting stuck needing to spend down the amount with stuff I didn't really need to avoid losing the money.

Based on where the money goes if there are funds left over, the company administering your account has more incentive to want you to use it than your company.  That doesn't mean they aren't incompetent about explaining how to make sure the right money is going to the right expense. 

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1 hour ago, ParadoxLost said:

France is not the same as the rest of Europe.  We used to have an office in France and my coworkers from there used to tell me that even people who interacted with tourists, such as cabs, airports, and hotels, will often pretend not to speak English even when they do.

My husband, who lived in France for a year or so as a child and visited periodically after that, also says that Paris is not the same as the rest of France.

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I broke both bones in my wrist on July 4 and finally got my cast off yesterday. I expected it to be weak and stiff since it's been immobilized for 6 weeks but I didn't expect it to still hurt. I woke up twice last night with pain because I unconsciously tried to use my hand to roll over. This is the most irritating injury I've ever had.

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9 hours ago, emma675 said:

I broke both bones in my wrist on July 4 and finally got my cast off yesterday. I expected it to be weak and stiff since it's been immobilized for 6 weeks but I didn't expect it to still hurt. I woke up twice last night with pain because I unconsciously tried to use my hand to roll over. This is the most irritating injury I've ever had.

I hesitate to post this because I'm hoping its telling you it could be worse but I'm a little worried that its a heads up of what you may still be in for.

I broke both bones in my wrist years ago.  Probably worse than you because I had to get surgery to get pins.  The worse part was that the wrist gets kind of frozen in a position that you can't really turn your hand over and it hurts like hell to try.  The physical therapist prescribed a torture device to fix it.  It was this a cast with a lever.  I had to wear it when sitting watching TV and when sleeping.  Try sleeping with a lever trying to push your wrist so your hand is palm up instead of palm down when its basically frozen in place. 

I can turn my hand over now but I still feel the stretch of it.  And the wrist was weak for a really long time.  Like years, but it wasn't so much pain as a feeling that something was still wrong with it because its not normal to be aware of your wrist.

The wrist didn't stop bugging me until I broke my ankle.  Don't do that.  I had to hop on one foot for six months (forced me to stop babying the wrist) and the PT made me pick up marbles with my toes which was supremely annoying (because there were 50 of them and my toes had lost dexterity I didn't know they ever had).

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I have decided I want to institute an International Day of Silence. For 24 blissful hours, no one can talk and no machines can make any kind of beeping, blaring, or musical noise, and yes, that includes music via headphones. No phone calls. The world has six months to figure out how to make it work, like how to install visual alerts on hospital machines. I don't care about the practicality of it. I'm completely and utterly exhausted by all the noise I suffer through all day at work—the screaming kids, the beeping scanner, the error sound the card reader makes, the safe beeping, the phone ringing constantly, the people who don't know how to modulate their voices, the other staff members talking through my earpiece, me having to talk to every person I see. It's all just TOO MUCH NOISE.

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ParadoxLost, thanks for the pep talk, lol! I actually broke my big toe about 2 weeks before I broke my wrist, so this has been the summer from hell. Luckily the toe healed enough before I went on vacation, but it was a bit of a pain dragging my arm cast around Spain and Portugal. When I was tired, I will admit to working the cast to my advantage a few times. I always got a seat on the bus, in the airport, etc.; people jumped to help me with my bags and helped me with my meals.

The only real jerks I ever encountered were in the US, imagine that. I was trying to juggle a bag from a takeaway place and open the door to leave with one arm and two older men just stared at me while I struggled. I hope karma is a bitch to them at some point.

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On 8/18/2019 at 11:46 AM, TattleTeeny said:

I have been watching the original 90210 on Hulu. The way Brandon Walsh chews gum is an enormous peeve, man! It is so annoying.

I cannot STAND people chewing gum.  Obviously esp folks that do it with their mouth open etc  But even folks that keep their mouth closed.  If people knew how they looked...and why would you chew gum in a business setting?  Right?  I see it all the time!  Gah!   *sigh* I know!  I'm weird!

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Pasting a long-ass link into a comment box with no description or explanation is pretty danged lazy. Don't put the onus on everyone else to find out what you're trying to say!

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Just now, 2727 said:

Pasting a long-ass link into a comment box with no description or explanation is pretty danged lazy. Don't put the onus on everyone else to find out what you're trying to say!

Especially when it could potentially be NSFW.

And add me to the gum-chewing hate list. Barf.

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