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Thicker Than Water - General Discussion


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Someone on twitter said, "The fact that Ben has only seen Cyrene grow up and that's not his bio child is a problem when he has like 5 or 6 bio kids." 

It's a damn shame.  Does anyone know if he has repented for his sins in his prosperity church? I mean, between him and his wife, my head is spinning as to how many kids there are..

  • Love 5
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Run, Junice, run!

Junice was having a calm discussion with her nieces until Jewel & Junetta came over.

Maybe Junice stays away from them because they like to put her business on blast, cackle like ghetto hens over cars and lord their material fortune over her lack thereof.

The new son is delivert.

Edited by drivethroo
  • Love 2
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These "sisters" kill me with the shit about they need to know EVERYTHING that goes on in each other's lives....Such bullshit....They don't need to know SQUAT if Junice chooses not to tell them....Do they know what time each other takes a shit as well?

 

The new son need some new clothes....THERE I said it....

  • Love 2
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I am so torn on the sisters... on one hand, Junice is kind of creepy to me and seems to harbor unnaturally dark feelings for her sisters.  On the other hand, Jewel is also creepy and seems to lack a soul.  She says all the right stuff and smiles at the camera, but there doesn't seem to be much human empathy in there.  I may be getting their names wrong because I can never keep any of these people's J names straight.

 

How hilarious that yet another child is moving in.  What is he, 40?  Either you're a loser or a famewhore.  And laughing my ass off at Ben calling them the 'juveniles'.... they may act juvenile, but all of these people are legal adults.  GET A JOB AND MOVE OUT.

 

Yet having said all of that, I actually enjoy this show.  Pray for me.

  • Love 3
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Do loser or fame whore have to be mutually exclusive, Driving Sideways?  

 

I am also with you about being split on the sisters. Junice seems like a natural born hater, but her sisters seem to have a cult-like devotion to knowing each other's personal business and talking about it on tv. I have a very small family and this show makes me thankful because this whole "sisterhood" thing these people have going sounds terribly unhealthy and dysfunctional.

 

Did it bother anyone else that Cyrene seemed to insert herself in to the sister's drama and act as an equal to these grown women? When she talked about her aunt in conversations and even when she pulled Junice to the side to address her issues, she sounded as if she was talking to her friend and not her aunt. And that crying at the end was a ploy for attention from Ben and the audience. I ain't buying it.

 

Ben, you CANNOT go home again. You were a terrible parent and frankly still are by favoring Cyrene over your biological children. But, you CANNOT parent grown ass, married men as if they are 14 since you were not interested when they actually were 14. Everybody needs to have a relax, relate, release moment and move on so that you can engage as adults you are now instead of wounded children of the past. Full grown adults should not be engaging with their parents the way these people do.

 

For example, I could not believe Brooklyn acting as if they had to drive (daddy's car) since Ben, Jewel, and Cyrene were flying. Why? Are you unable to buy a plane ticket if you don't want to drive? You aren't paying room or board so, where's your money? I hope that whole scenario was a producer set up.

  • Love 4
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Do loser or fame whore have to be mutually exclusive, Driving Sideways?  

 

I am also with you about being split on the sisters. Junice seems like a natural born hater, but her sisters seem to have a cult-like devotion to knowing each other's personal business and talking about it on tv. I have a very small family and this show makes me thankful because this whole "sisterhood" thing these people have going sounds terribly unhealthy and dysfunctional.

 

Did it bother anyone else that Cyrene seemed to insert herself in to the sister's drama and act as an equal to these grown women? When she talked about her aunt in conversations and even when she pulled Junice to the side to address her issues, she sounded as if she was talking to her friend and not her aunt. And that crying at the end was a ploy for attention from Ben and the audience. I ain't buying it.

 

Ben, you CANNOT go home again. You were a terrible parent and frankly still are by favoring Cyrene over your biological children. But, you CANNOT parent grown ass, married men as if they are 14 since you were not interested when they actually were 14. Everybody needs to have a relax, relate, release moment and move on so that you can engage as adults you are now instead of wounded children of the past. Full grown adults should not be engaging with their parents the way these people do.

 

For example, I could not believe Brooklyn acting as if they had to drive (daddy's car) since Ben, Jewel, and Cyrene were flying. Why? Are you unable to buy a plane ticket if you don't want to drive? You aren't paying room or board so, where's your money? I hope that whole scenario was a producer set up.

So yes, to all of this... But did daddy have to announce that he had 50 11 jets? (which i don't believe by the way).  Typical nouveau riche people who could easily run out of money soon. 

 

And yes, Ben is trying so hard to be Cliff Huxtable (sorry about the reference) and it ain't working!! Quit crying those crocodile tears!  I felt bad for ALL of his 50-11 kids!

  • Love 2
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While Junice got on my nerves last season, it was mainly because I was unable to truly understand where she was coming from. Yeah, her sisters seem slightly overbearing, but they didn't seem so bad to where Junice needed to move all the way to Texas to get away from them.

 

But after Junetta started going in about how Junice is keeping up a facade while their lights and water were getting shut off and on, I finally got it. Junetta cuts deep -- you don't out someone's business out there like that. It's embarrassing! Who isn't going to try to save face while going through financial struggles, especially when your siblings are well-off? Jewel seems to be skirting the surface because her family is the focus of the show (but we'll see how the season turns out) and she, too, wants to project a certain image. Junetta? Hmph. 

  • Love 4
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I was surprised this show got another season.  I didn't think anyone else besides me had watched it! 

 

Junice was right about all that carrying on and praising Jesus for a new Bentley.  It was ridiculous, but these people seem to truly believe that wealth is personally arranged by the Lord.  So what does that say about your average person like me who can never afford a car like that?  Jesus doesn't love me as much as the Tankards?  I understand perfectly now why Junice had to move away from them to save her own sanity.

 

I still don't have all the kids figured out and who they belong to.  Am I right that Ben and Jewel don't have any children from their marriage and that all "the juveniles" are from prior relationships?

  • Love 3
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With all of the interracial relationships and marriages these days, why are they being all "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" about the daughter bringing her white friend to the party?  And did Daddy Tankard have to sit there yelling "Ahem!" like some deranged lunatic when they walked in?  Get some class!  I felt all kinds of secondhand embarrassment through that whole scene.  I feel they wouldn't have behaved like that if the young man had been black.  And the daughter calling him "the opposite race"?  Really?  So what's the opposite of Chinese?  What's the opposite of Mexican?  smdh

  • Love 2
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Not to mention her talking about how she'd love to have children with green or hazel eyes....I was floored...I thought they were just "friends" yet she told Marcus she's been seeing him...and the boyfriend she had before (wh owas black) got the same kinda flak from Ben at first remember?..And Ben yappin' about how he's a MILLIONAIRE was jsut so inappropriate...He needs to remember that "pride goeth before a fall"....

 

And oh yeah, I hate Jewell..

Edited by GrtGzu
  • Love 3
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With all of the interracial relationships and marriages these days, why are they being all "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" about the daughter bringing her white friend to the party? 

 

They do live in the South.  Not all areas of the South are as accepting of gay or interracial relationships.  I don't want to pick on the South but if they lived in a bigger city, it might not be as big of a deal.  Like if Cyrene was dating her boyfriend in Washington DC or lived with Junetta in Baltimore it probably wouldn't be that big of a deal.  Plus Cyrene is of a younger generation who isn't as hung up on interracial relationships as Ben/Jewel's generation.  Remember, Loving v Virginia was only decided less than 50 years ago and they were still fighting over integrating schools well into the 70s.   A lot of predominately white colleges didn't have a whole lot of black people attending them well into the 80s.  If Jewel & Ben are in their 40s and 50s, interracial relationships just weren't that acceptable/prevalent.....and still might not be in their TN town.

 

 

  I feel they wouldn't have behaved like that if the young man had been black.

 

Yes, they would have and they did with the black boyfriend from last season.

 

 And the daughter calling him "the opposite race"?  Really?  So what's the opposite of Chinese?  What's the opposite of Mexican?  smdh

 

Well the opposite of black is white, so....

 

I had more of a problem with Marcus claiming black girls wouldn't date him because he wasn't a thug than with Cyrene saying she wanted to date the "opposite race." Marcus is delivert & not attractive and that's probably the main reason black girls weren't dating him.   And water seeks it's own level so stop going after girls who like thugs.  There's a lot of them out there, and apparently Marcus married one of them so he needs to sit down.  I like him otherwise, though.

 

I just want to know what Britney's deal is.  Maybe Marcus didn't bail Britney out of jail or give a bunch of excuses/sympathy for her & Brooklyn's extracurricular activities.

  • Love 3
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If you believe God gives money to only those you deserve it, not only are you seriously fucked up.  Not know anything about Christianity.  But have a serious problem when wealth and spiritual health still prevent you from looking in the mirror and yet every day dressing like you man hips aren't as wide as you are tall and still DRESS THAT DAMN WAY.  How much does Jesus love you know Papa Glump?  When the BRAVO paycheck only comes when you stomp around in front of the cameras wearing clothes that not only do not hide that huge ass but make your legs look six inches long? 

 

I avoid this show but I suspect that Junice despite her flaws does realize that pay or not, these people are nothing but the sideshow at the BRAVO FREAKS of FAME carnival  I suspect she gets some kind of reward other than cameras attention and that is what makes her flip back and forth between sense and nonsense.

  • Love 4
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I can't with all of the talk of sisterhood. I am glad Junice didn't tell her annoying ass sisters that her husband was locked up. Even with all of her issues, I like her best out of everyone on this show because I think she has her sisters' numbers and she's not interested in playing their game. Her own sister outed that the husband was in jail and that her lights/water has been cut off several times on national television...with family like that, who needs enemies?

 

I am bothered by Ben's relationship with Cyrene. I really am. I understand he was in her life when she was a toddler and has essentially raised her, but he is a shitty person for not doing right by his oldest children. I caught how quickly he was to hug Cyrene when she was upset, but Britney was standing there 'Like, uh, what about me?'. Playing favorites with your children is a very dangerous game.

 

If reality television has taught me anything, it's that when people brag and brag and brag about what they have, shit will hit the fan eventually. I think Ben and his wife missed the important lessons in the Bible about humility. The constant bragging is not a good look.

  • Love 8
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So, Jewel and Junetta are terrible people with the self awareness skills of a 2 yr olds.

 

That conversation Jewel had with Cyrene made me like her even less and have a tad more sympathy for Cyrene. I think what really set off Jewel's feelings of betrayal was Cyrene's reference about Junice being so close to her and instrumental in her growing up. I saw something in Jewel that made me think there is something about that relationship that makes her feel competitive instead of thankful that her daughter had a loving, adult caregiver they could trust.

 

These people are also terrible actors and the editors of this show aren't so great either. I call BS on the white boyfriend being a real suitor. I also don't believe Ben didn't know about the allegedly positive pee stick AND I think they are showing scenes out of sequence because since when do Marcus and his wife live in Missouri? This goes back to the theory that Marcus was only added to try and generate storyline and also to get him a check because this couple doesn't strike me as one who is doing well financially without Ben's involvement.

  • Love 2
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Okay, I admit I only watch this show enough to get all the characters names down, but uh, did I hear Ben's daughter Brooklyn say something to the effect that she once ran a BROTHEL ??? or some such fuck and awe shit?  Seriously?  Where in the seven hells was preacher Daddy when all this was going on?  Not to rank on juveniles but I was wondering why Brooklyn would give her daughter Diamond such a straight-up hooker/stripper's name.  I get it now.

  • Love 1
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I was never able to take this show seriously after seeing last season's picnic episode during which the Stankards feasted on fondue.

 

While perplexed at the lack of flatware present on the picnic table.  

 

Then using a spoon to pour the cheese over the items meant to be dipped.

 

If you're going to act like you're all that and spontaneous little gourmet picnics are part of your lifestyle, at least google how to eat fucking fondue.  

 

And Jewell or whatever the wife's name is, holding classes on women on how to "fake it til you make it."  

 

I believe even Kandi Burruss from RHOA was mortified at that little charade.  

 

I'd love for someone who lives in their area to weigh in about just how often services are conducted at their church.

 

I'll bet it isn't more than half a dozen times per year and that building is probably some massive tax write-off for them.  

 

That being said, I'll bet they have no qualms about passing around the collection plate whenever they do have services.  

  • Love 1
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Okay, I'm just going to say it. Ben's sons seem very zesty to me. Maybe it's a southern thing.

 

 

I like her best out of everyone on this show because I think she has her sisters' numbers and she's not interested in playing their game.

 

See, I think it's the opposite - I think Junice is very much playing games. She can no longer compete financially so she's playing the only cards she has, being secretive, withholding and separating herself, because she knows it drives her family crazy. Ben made the comment tonight that Rock and Junice were doing as well as everyone else until they lost a lot due to the recession, and then they suddenly started becoming anti-materialistic. Ben: "They was as materialistic as the rest of us ... until they ran out of material."  Bahahahaha! Right or wrong, that was some funny ish right there.

 

I promised I wouldn't watch this show which was CLEARLY designed to generate a check for all these "juveniles." But WTF. There's nothing else on after the Ho'Wives. And I'm basically Bravo's bitch. I just don't usually make it so obvious by posting about these shows.

  • Love 6
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See, I think it's the opposite - I think Junice is very much playing games. She can no longer compete financially so she's playing the only cards she has, being secretive, withholding and separating herself, because she knows it drives her family crazy. Ben made the comment tonight that Rock and Junice were doing as well as everyone else until they lost a lot due to the recession, and then they suddenly started becoming anti-materialistic. Ben: "They was as materialistic as the rest of us ... until they ran out of material."  Bahahahaha! Right or wrong, that was some funny ish right there.

 

It drives her family crazy for the wrong reasons. Not because they love her and want the best for her, but because they worry they won't anything to throw back in her face in the heat of an argument. I find Jewel and the other sister very selfish. I'm not a fan of Junice, but I much prefer her to her sisters and Ben.

 

And I truly believe that all is not perfect with Ben's finances. I'm not convinced that all is right with them.

  • Love 3
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I can see Jewel and Junetta making Junice feel very uncomfortable about her lack of materials.  If Jewel is driving a Benz and Junetta is driving a Bentley and Junice had a Lexus, and then Junice & her husband had a financial setback so now she's driving a 1996 Nissan Altima, I can see Junice distancing herself, ESPECIALLY if Jewel & Junetta are throwing their new cars in her face.

 

If Jewel has a house big enough to ride a bike in the foyer and Junetta has a brand new house in Baltimore, and Junice has a small apartment and the water and lights are getting cut off, and you're throwing that in her face, no she's not going to want to come around.

 

I'm not saying Jewel and Junetta ARE throwing their materials in Junice's face but I can see them doing it, especially with the way Junetta took such glee to announce Junice's water got cut off & her husband was in jail.  Unless you are trying to bail him out, pay his legal fees and call the county to pay their water bill for them, why do you need to know all of that?

 

Why do they want Junice around so badly? If there's a family member that didn't want to rock with me, I'm not going to force the issue.  I'll issue the invite; if you come, you come.  If you don't, you don't.  And life will go on.

 

I think there's probably more to the Marcus/Britney beef than Marcus not standing up to whatever men were issuing beatdowns to the Brooklyn/Benji/Britney crew.  For one, Marcus was a child himself and not trying to catch a beatdown.  That wasn't Marcus' responsibility to stop men from beating the other 3 siblings down.  That was BEN'S responsibility.

 

But from the way Marcus responded to why Cyrene was bringing him, I think it's deeper than beatdowns and Marcus knows exactly why Britney is not enamoured of him.

  • Love 3
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These people are so materialistic so I can see the sister's point.  The irony is that, don't the Tankards live like 30 miles outside of Nashville?  Not exactly vaunted real estate (no offense Tennesseeans).  If I recall, the property backs up to a private airport.  Sounds peaceful?  Plus, the house looks like a standard McMansion to me, and it seems like 18,000 people live in it.  So the Tankards do not scream wealth to me... rather when they crow about some luxury item or new vehicle they have, it makes me sad because (a) aren't they Christians? and (b) they just look really try hard and struggling.  I'm talking mainly about Junetta (?) and Ben and a few of the juveniles... I like a few cast members of this show, but I can never keep any of their names straight.  It's like a clown car and more and more Tankards keeps rushing forth every episode.

  • Love 4
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Okay, when are we going to progress as a society and let go of this grossly misogynistic belief that men can be as sexual as they please but women can't "have too many partners"? Cyrene is a young woman who is interested in sex (she's damn near 18!), but obviously harbors guilt about it and that is not okay. This boy she's interested in is *not* a virgin, and when he learns about Cyrene's virginity his reply is, "That's good -- I wouldn't want my wife to sleep with many people." I wonder what that boy's number is.

 

I bet you if Cyrene ever said the same about her future husband, she'd have boys running from her. Also, I admit that I'm of the belief that boys should never know your sexual status until you're dating them, especially if you're a virgin because the way our society worships virginity is just plain creepy.

 

I'm so glad my mom never raised me with this mindset that I should feel guilty about sex. I was never guilted into being chaste and "pure" (seriously irks me when virgins are described as "pure"), nor has she ever told me that women who have multiple partners are sluts/whores/etc and are not to be respected. And you know what happens when you have a mature conversation about sex with your children? They are able to make sound, mature decisions about it. No hand-wringing, no overthinking, no feeling wrapped up in the loss of self-worth -- peace. 

  • Love 3
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Well it looks like next week Cyrene will be slut shamed by the family.

I'm glad Britney now understands that Marcus couldn't have protected her because he was getting abused himself (which explains a lot about him & Benji). But who was abusing the kids? The only common denominator between the kids would be BEN's family member ( Ben's mom, brother, sister etc). Because Marcus said HIS grandmother ( not THEIR grandmother) would have to come get him. I can't see Marcus staying with Brooklyn/Britney/Benji mom and vice versa, so it would have to be a Tankard family connection that was abusing the kids.

And where were their mothers?

  • Love 1
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I'm new to this show so I have several questions. Do any of the kids share a mother? I read somewhere he was divorced twice but he was never married to Marcus' mother.  Wherever the abuse occurred it seems to have been Marcus's primary residence until his grandmother rescued him. Since the other siblings were visiting this home on weekends and summers, it must have been Ben's home. But if Ben was always on the road, why didn't Marcus live with his mother. It seems that Marcus' mother recently passed, judging by his website. I know on a previous episode he mentioned something about his early relationship with his dad, but I don't remember what he said. 

 

Where is Cyrene's dad?

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This family is such a hodgepodge.  I can't keep any of the daughters straight and am at the point of not caring any more.  I still can't get past one of them admitting to being a pimp/madam.  How does one so young actually become one of those and whose children was she pimping out?  I say children because I can't see any older women having her as their pimp/madam.  Did she say she ran the brothel or just worked there?  Damned shame.

Edited by swankie
  • Love 4
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It was Ben's "peeples" that were abusing the kids while he was out on the road "chasing millions" as he said....Cyrene's dad isn't in her life, and hasn't been - that's why Ben adopted her when he married Jewel...Brookly was actually RUNNING a brothel and got busted - it was in the news.....

 

That boy is gonna break Cyrene's heart - he's not for her, and why hasn't she met HIS parents yet?

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Do any of the kids share a mother?

 

Yes and no:

 

Marcus' mother was a college jumpoff.

 

Brooklyn, Britney & Benji share a mom.  I'm assumed this woman was Ben's first or second wife.

 

Cyrene is Jewel's child that Ben raised.  Cyrene's dad apparently was never in the picture.

 

The only three that are full siblings are Brooklyn, Britney & Benji.

 

 

Wherever the abuse occurred it seems to have been Marcus's primary residence until his grandmother rescued him. Since the other siblings were visiting this home on weekends and summers, it must have been Ben's home. But if Ben was always on the road, why didn't Marcus live with his mother.

 

I think Marcus explained on the first episode he was on that he started living with Ben in his early teens.  Marcus could've been a handful (as boys tend to be) and his mom sent him to live with Ben OR his mom could've had personal issues to the point where she couldn't raise a child or BOTH.

 

My theory is this:

 

Ben was either married to Wife 2 or living with his parents/family.  Marcus came to live with him.  The 3 Bs would stay summers/vacations/weekends. 

 

Either Wife 2 had a male (boyfriend, brother, father, cousin) in her life that was abusing the children or Ben's male relative was abusing the children.

 

Marcus' mother's mother finds out about the abuse and snatches her grandson up out of there.  But she's no relation to the other kids so not much she can do for them, especially since they aren't in that household all the time.

 

Ben feels super guilty because he knowingly left all his kids in an abusive household and would rather be on the road than deal with them/that.  So now that they are adults, he's extra indulgent to make it up to them.  He would be even MORE indulgent with them but Jewel shuts that down.

 

Ben is extra there for Cyrene to make up for him not being a good father to his 4 bio kids.  It's to Ben & Jewel's credit that the 4 bio kids don't seem resentful of Cyrene (jealous yes, resentful, no) for getting the love and care they should've gotten.

 

 

I still can't get past one of them admitting to being a pimp/madam.  How does one so young actually become one of those and whose children was she pimping out?  I say children because I can't see any older women having her as their pimp/madam.  Did she say she ran the brothel or just worked there?

 

Brooklyn ran the brothel.  Britney just worked there (I heard she was an underage bartender or something).  Both of them were arrested.  I don't think Benji had anything to do with it.  Brooklyn must've been "out there" because she has a 14 year old daughter and only in her mid/late 20s.

 

 

That boy is gonna break Cyrene's heart - he's not for her, and why hasn't she met HIS parents yet?

 

For one, they are both too young for serious relationships and 2, I think Cyrene would have a better chance of a longer lasting interracial relationship if she left TN and moved to an East Coast big city where nobody would care, like DC.

 

 

As far as Benji and Shanira's house hunting, I think Ben and Jewel should buy the condo, not Benji & Shanira.  Ben & Jewel could then either rent it to Benji & Shanira.  When the money is paid back in full, deed it over to them.  If they flake out, Ben & Jewel could either kick them out and sell the unit or lease it to somebody else.  Lots of parents either give their kids substantial down payments to get their first homes or buy the home with the kids.

Edited by drivethroo
  • Love 2
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So, I re-watched this last night because Mr. Red was catching up on the episode.

 

The team behind this show has done a terrible job communicating the storylines for this season in a compelling way. Regarding the abuse, I understand it is painful to give full disclosure and I don't need all details as a viewer, but there is a bare minimum I need communicated in order to attach to a narrative.

 

1) A general sketch of what happened: Based on the various statements of the kids and Ben at different times, I'm unclear whether it was bullying from cousins, physical beatings by adult relatives/boyfriends or molestation. All of these are wrong, but I am truly unclear of the actions being labeled as abuse.

 

2) What did Ben know and when did he know it? Is this a situation where Brooklyn, Britney and/or Marcus (or someone else) told their father what was going on at the time and he did nothing? Or, did they tell him later while feeling safe in the relationship and are still dealing with the aftermath. Both reactions are understandable and deserving of our empathy. But, I'm not getting a clear picture of what Ben's culpability was in the situation and I need that as a viewer.

 

3) Where were the mothers? I understand that Ben was the custodial parent at the time of the abuse, but if I am sending my child to their father's house and every time I do, he/she is shaking, crying or nervous, I need to know what's up?

 

I have a feeling the Tankards are trying to shield the possibly guilty who are not on the show, but if this situation is just too painful to accurately summarize on camera, leave it out. The way things were communicated in this episode just was unsatisfactory.

 

In other news, I still don't believe that boy is Cyrene's real boyfriend. So, I will try and tell myself that during all the slut shaming and forced conversations with Pheadra (my full term baby was 4 months early) Parks about private matters being forced on Cyrene are just for reality show drama.

  • Love 2
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3) Where were the mothers? I understand that Ben was the custodial parent at the time of the abuse, but if I am sending my child to their father's house and every time I do, he/she is shaking, crying or nervous, I need to know what's up?

 

I'm thinking Marcus' mother wasn't in the picture very much because he said he called his grandmother and his grandmother came and snatched him up from the abuse.  He told Britney the abuse they (3 Bs) suffered during summers & vacations, he suffered all the time.  I think he mentioned on his first episode he came to live with Ben around his teen/tween years.

 

If Marcus' mother was in the picture, it seems like he would've called HER for help instead of his grandmother who lived 6 hours away.

 

I think we saw the 3Bs' mother in the season finale last year when Benji & Shanira got (re)married. 

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This latest episode was an odd viewing experience for me.  I just didn't think anything as serious as child abuse would rear it's head in this show that I hate watch to see simple people argue over materialistic concerns.  It was a bit too much for me and now that the clearer picture of the past 20 yrs is shown, really makes my feelings for Ben go from mocking amusement to dislike.

  • Love 1
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If your children are visiting every other weekend, summers and holidays shouldn't you be home to exercise this parenting time?  The purpose of visitation is for you to be there to bond and spend time with your children.  How are you doing that if your not there?  Then you leave them in the hands of abusive people, in order to chase "millions". Being on the road is not a bad thing but you should make sure your children are safe and secure.  Why couldn't they go on the road with him, people do it all the time.   I sure hope it comes out who was abusing the 3B's and Marcus.

I wonder if Cyrene asked for help with a large purchase would she be made to contribute part of the down payment?  Just wondering.

Edited by appledumpling
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I think Ben should not have used the word skank but Cyrene was so offended by it because that's how she was acting. That kid only wants to get on TV, he's not that into her and she's doing girlfriend/boyfriend activities with someone who won't claim her.

Phaedra is the LAST person to get values lessons from.

  • Love 2
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Cyrene is not acting like a skank and shame on Ben for even thinking of using that word against her. As a parent, he should have known better, even if he is as old-skool as he claims. I don't blame her for being angry and breaking down. To be slut-shamed by your own father? Shit, that's painful.

 

And why are we not thinking of the possibility that it is *she* who is not claiming that boy? At the time of filming, she's about to move away to Howard, so why would she get deeply involved with a boy she's going to have to leave behind? Why can't young people just casually date without it being such an issue?

 

This is probably my own bias coming into play because I'm around the ages of Cyrene's older sisters, but this "old-skool" way of thinking is just so negative, and disgusting, and so very deeply misogynistic. You can't convince me that Benji and Marcus were hounded the way Cyrene is, and to have them as proud gatekeepers to her virginity? 

 

Fix it, Jesus. 

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As far as the family gatekeeping her virginity, Cyrene's virginity is a commodity in that they're supposed to be this religious family & they're making money telling other people how to live.  So if Cyrene is out there sleeping with this or that person, that's damaging the brand & image the family is trying to build now.

 

Ben wasn't calling Benji (who married Shanira b/c she got pregnant), Marcus or Brooklyn's (who had a kid as a teenager) behavior skank-like because he was never around to do that.

 

Back to Cyrene, she tells Ben she would only call somebody a boyfriend if she was serious about them, like on the road to marriage.  That's fine. But then don't do boyfriend/girlfriend-like activities with someone you're not serious with (and with someone who is not serious about YOU).  I think that's the point Ben was trying to make but failed at doing.  That little boy is not serious about Cyrene, he just wants to feel some booty and get on TV.  He will be like Cyrene Who? when he goes off to his college and starts macking on the sorority girls.  Cyrene needs to clarify within herself whether or not she wants to remain a virgin until marriage and whether she wants to be a virgin until marriage for herself or for her family (hint: she needs to do it for herself!).

 

Cyrene's not clear on what she wants to do and all her hormones are jumping, which can make her an easy mark for some guy with an agenda.

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Neither Cyrene nor her sexuality should be a commodity for her family's brand. Cyrene needs to be clear about whatever decision she makes regarding her sexuality for herself. I am so sad that the conversation with her mom and Phaedra wasn't from the angle of, "Sex is more than just a physical act." or "Girl, don't do what I have done." and not "No ringy, no dingy". Even though they may think they are teaching her God's principles, those women were outlining high priced prostitution and patriarchy. Neither a ring or a marriage ceremony guarantee a respectful, healthy relationship. The ability to attain and maintain that have little to do with a financial transaction or a party.

 

How did the conversation go from a discussion of kissing and hand holding to "skank behavior", "sleeping with this or that person" and "feeling on some booty"? None of those are things Cyrene sited as happening between her and her friend.

 

Also, why is it that Cyrene is unclear about what she wants to do because hormones, unless she decides she wants to remain a virgin until marriage? If the assertion is that she is too hormonal to make a good decision, then wouldn't that apply to a virginity pledge as well? IRL, we all make life decisions at this age. I am sad that Cyrene does not appear to be equipped via support network or self-knowledge to make these decisions in a healthy environment.

 

Regarding the other Tankard children: Benji has been married @ 2 years? It appears Ben has been involved with his children longer than that. In fact, based on their conversation in the jewelry store during Marcus's birthday episode, I'm 90% sure Ben bought the wedding rings. I don't think he had to worry about Marcus because, well Marcus. I don't know the timeline for Brooklyn's activities so, I'm unsure whether Ben wasn't involved at that time or if she was rebelling. These points go to my earlier comment about how this show does a terrible job communicating what Ben knew and when he knew it.

Edited by red12
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Cyrene's family is all about patriarchy so they're not going to advocate any differently and they're certainly not going to advocate exploring herself or her sexuality.  If she's not clear about what she wants to do sexually, there is no harm and no consequences in NOT having sex.

 

Last season, Benji & Shanira alluded to the fact they got married because Shanira got pregnant.  Even though they lost the baby, they decided to stay together and have a big ceremony.  I'm pretty sure Ben did buy the wedding rings; Benji had no money.  That's why they were living with Ben & Jewel.

 

Brooklyn is about 29 years old and Diamond is 14.  That means Brooklyn had her around 15 years old.  If Ben was calling Cyrene's making out "skank like" he may have had some choice words for Brooklyn...that is, if he was around to deliver them.

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Ben was wrong for interrogating Rock on his finances at the table.

 

Junice probably didn't want them coming to her house because the sisters would be the first to say how small Junice's house was, how Junetta's garage is bigger, Jewel has a bigger this or that, etc.  Nobody wants that energy coming up into their house.

 

HOWEVER, if you know you have guests (especially family members) coming in from out of town specifically to see YOU, inviting them over to your house is customary.  It would be totally different if Jewel & Junetta were on their way to Arizona and stopped over to visit Junice real quick.  Then ok, meet up at the restaurant and send them about their way.

 

But if you know they're driving down from TN/MD specifically to see YOU, tidy up your house and invite them over.  And if they say something snarky about your house, that's the last time they'll come over, right?

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I've only caught the past couple of episodes and still can't remember anyone's names off the top of my head, but I came to this thread get some clarity and discovered what "delivert" was all about, and that has made it all worthwhile.

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(edited)

I've been trying forever to figure out who Jewel reminds me of.  It's Ruthie Alcaide from The Real World Hawaii.  Something about their eyes and mouth I think.  Ruthie is prettier though. http://vh1.mtvnimages.com/uri/mgid:uma:video:vh1.com:150212?width=281&height=211

 

Anyway, do these sisters ever just get along?  I don't understand why they have such a problem with Junice?  I agree with Cyberfruit.  Just leave her alone.

Edited by swankie
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Or maybe you don't, you know, INVITE THEM TO YOUR HOUSE! "I want you all to come down, with the kids and all and come to our house in Austin."  Did you not think they'd take you up on it?

 

Ben was 100% wrong to ask what he did to feed his family. And Junice is enjoying the power she's getting from having separated herself and acting like she gives no fucks when they cry and carry on about "the sisterhood." You care, or you wouldn't bother to involve yourself in these situations, for real. Methinks she had her own number while explaining the poor, sad controlling person. I hate people who can never take any part of ownership of problems. They sit there and generously let you apologize. Yeah, I would definitely be giving her the space and distance she wants. Deuces!

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I think the invitation to TX went like this:

 

Jewel & Junetta whined to Junice about her not coming to see them (pro-tip: if somebody's having trouble keeping their lights/water on, they might not have money for trips to TN & MD)

 

Junice said fine, you wanna see me? Come to TX.

 

Jewel & Junetta rounded up their families to go to TX...because they want to see how Junice is really living.

 

Junice knows the main reason Jewel & Junetta are coming to see her is to be nosy and see how she's living.  If she was living in big houses like them, she'd gladly invite them over to show off.  But she's probably living in a very modest/small home and doesn't want to hear their snide remarks about how small/modest her house is.  Hence, all the meeting at restaurants.

 

Ben tipped off the real reason for the trip by asking Rock how he is providing for his family. Which, unless Ben & Jewel are buying Rock & Junice a house too, is none of their business.

 

Junice lines, Jewel lines, Junetta lines.

 

Ben's kids knew what Ben, Jewel & Junetta were up to with this trip (being nosy) and that's why Brooklyn was like "this mess must come to an end."

 

None of my theory is to absolve Junice from her role in this mess.  If you have family/friends coming from out of state to see you, 99% of the time they are going to visit you AT YOUR HOUSE.  Now I've met friends from out of town at Starbucks or a restaurant but they weren't coming specifically to see ME, they were making a quick stop in town so let's get together, they were visiting their mom but I want to catch up with you...type of thing.

 

Junice knew those people wanted to see her small modest house.  She should've invited them to her small, modest house. NONE of the juveniles would've looked down on Auntie Junice's house.  The only 3 people that would've said something snarky about Junice's house would've been Ben, Jewel & Junetta.

 

And when they did (because they would've), Junice should've said "Thank you for coming" and waved bye bye to them.  When they ask in the future whycome she doesn't invite them to her house, she could then point out that when she did, they insulted her house.

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What I found strange was although Ben showed his ass the other sisters behaved as though they made the comment and Junice was responding to them directly. I'm a little new to the show and I don't know Ben & Jewel's interaction, but does she need to own any kind of foolishness he utters?

 

Ben's TH claiming he got why Junice was upset -- that he needed to make a big deal about her graduation really pissed me off. No, you don't get it. You'll throw the requisite party to keep the peace, but we know you only worship the accomplishment of money.

Edited by Iguessnot
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