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The Shows of 2015: More Indecipherable Seasonings


Bella
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(edited)

I finally figured out where I knew Emmanuel from, a Bravo competitive cooking show called Chef Academy.

*Warning: Story contains links that will take you to graphic nudity if clicked on*

A lot of women have stood in line for him.

 

ETA: Sorry about that. (I actually didn't click the links.)

 

In other news, were those some of the worst looking plates we have seen on this show or what? 

Edited by xaxat
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Well, he did say he needed the money to fund his cooking/workout videos.....my mind is going to a bad, bad place.... LOL

(I added a little warning note in case someone goes poking around in that story at work or with kids in the room.)

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(Kicks cooksdelight over)

Sorry moddy but Emmanuel is mine. Can he please skip the line at Next Food Network Star and just give him a show already? And please put him in a small...make that very small and tight...make that very tight....piece of clothing...make that small piece of clothing. If Giada can let her skin show I say turnabout is fair play.

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I finally figured out where I knew Emmanuel from, a Bravo competitive cooking show called Chef Academy.

*Warning: Story contains links that will take you to graphic nudity if clicked on*

A lot of women have stood in line for him.

Oh shit, I watched that show! I remember the other contestants find out about him, & in one of the last episodes someone gets him to appear wearing nothing but an apron. I would have never connected him on Chopped with him on Chef Academy, he is definitely yummy.

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All I have to say about tonight's episode is that Emmanuel can come cook at my house any time he wants to..... ANY....TIME..... AT ALL......

he can come to my house, and I won't even require him to cook. He can just talk about food in that sexy accent.

(I'm on a diet)

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(edited)

  Make room on the Emanuel Love Train for me! In French terms, "Holy Merde!" Is he hot or what!?  ITA that the Food Network should definitely give him his own show. When it comes to sexiness, Emanuel gives Eddie, an ex-football player who's one of the contestants on this season's Food Network Star, a run for the money.

Edited by DollEyes
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(edited)

He did nothing for me, so you don't have to worry about one more person fighting over him.  I thought he was cute in his talking heads during the introductory portion, but his floppy hair during the show itself ruined it for me.

 

The plating that one chef did during the appetizer round was beautiful!  The champ’s appetizer probably would have looked decent had she allowed time for the fish to rest before slicing it (or just not sliced it under the circumstances), but it still would have been a tad overdone.  I got such a craving for ginger ice cream watching that round.

 

If the champ said "awesome" one more time, I was going to throw something.  And, no, "sando" isn't short for sandwich. 

Edited by Bastet
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Well, they had sob story going against French chef in the final round, and sob story usually wins but French chef also usually wins, so it was a real tossup.

 

 

And, no, "sando" isn't short for sandwich. 

Made me nostalgic for a Rachael Ray sammie.  There was something about the winner that bugged.  I think she reminded me of Elise who, IIRC, had some skirmishes with Scott Conant. 

 

I thought the French chef AND SC were entirely too scruffy.  But I'm old.

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The plating that one chef did during the appetizer round was beautiful!  The champ’s appetizer probably would have looked decent had she allowed time for the fish to rest before slicing it (or just not sliced it under the circumstances), but it still would have been a tad overdone.  I got such a craving for ginger ice cream watching that round.

If the champ said "awesome" one more time, I was going to throw something.  And, no, "sando" isn't short for sandwich.

I was really wondering why the champ sliced up her fish in the appetizer round. It would have looked so much better, and it's not like fish is exactly difficult for the judges to cut up themselves.

 

Okay I wasn't the only thing thinking "sando" was not slang for sandwich, or at least not slang I've ever heard. I have, however, heard it used in a rather derogatory way. A quick search on Urbandictonary.net brought up the definition I was thinking of (don't judge, lol, I don't even know why I've heard it before but my brother used to be into some pretty hard core rap so maybe that's why).  To be fair it also shows "short for sandwich" as one definition, but far more common are a couple of not so good ones. Google shows all three, too.  It doesn't show up in any real dictionary since it's slang. I guess she can call it whatever she wants, but I was thinking she should've just said "sandwich."  I think the judges thought so too - I thought they were going to laugh at her for a minute there.

 

Oh, and we finally have PROOF they can in fact fit two ice cream machines in the Chopped kitchen!  I knew it.

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I'm glad you ladies all found something to entertain you during the hour because as an hour of Chopped (like all the hours since they cut out the judging and insisted on a twist every week), it sucked.  Melted ice cream shoehorned into food - eech.

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They really do need to keep that second ice cream machine. I don't like the way they have made this into another cutthroat kitchen. I want to see the chefs make good food in the allotted time not fight to get to a piece of equipment before the others.

 

I wish they would someday update that kitchen set. Nothing has ever been done to it since the first show. It is dull, and depressing. They may be still using the same pots and pans from the first season. At least Chopped Canada's set is bright and uplifting. Great colors and it looks like really new equipment. FN budget can't be that bad. I mean really, the contestants have to pay their own way plus rooming. That $10,000 prize doesn't sound all that good anymore. By the time the taxman comes not much is left. I laugh every time I hear a chef spout off about all the grand plans they have for that GREAT prize.

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(edited)

As they say on the show, tell us your story cooksdelight,

 

"Ted, for years my family tried to convince me that my sister was born two years after I was. Despite that, despite the "birth certificates", despite the fact that she didn't appear in any family photos until I was a toddler, deep down in my heart, I just knew we were twins. . . "

Edited by xaxat
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What the hell.   That Four Seasons chef got fucking ROBBBBED.  He had technique out the wazoo and just did a helluva lot more on each dish than she did.  What the fuck EVER.  Was that graded on a curve????

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It drove me crazy trying to remember where I had seen Chef Robyn before, thankfully I figured out she was on Hell's Kitchen. Just another chef doing the rounds, and using the word "culinarian" way too much.

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What the hell.   That Four Seasons chef got fucking ROBBBBED.  He had technique out the wazoo and just did a helluva lot more on each dish than she did.  What the fuck EVER.  Was that graded on a curve????

I just watched the show on my DVR. Sure Robyn was just a tad wacko but she appeared to have done a better job in transforming all the ingredients in all the rounds and you know that the judges love the transformations.  

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(edited)

Robyn was also a rotating judge on some other damn Food Truck show (not Tyler's), where they'd bring out four teams to pitch their ideas and give two of them two services each, with the winner getting the truck as a prize.  Come to think of it, I remember thinking at the time "that's a good way to use up those old, leftover, used, beaten on food trucks" which maybe means that show was on FN, too?  Why were they all pretending they'd never seen the likes of her before?  I can't even remember the show title or much of anything else except the main judge was some dude named "Steak" who sounded like a coked-up 70s radio DJ.

Edited by Totale
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Thanks, xax, that's the one.  I mean, when they brought She Whose Name Cannot Be Spoken back they were happy to announce she'd been featured on another FN show, wonder why they didn't do so here?

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I knew Robyn looked (and sounded) familiar. She was on Hell's Kitchen, season 10.

THANK you! I couldn't figure out where I knew her from. I just wanted her to SHUT. UP. Every round I was praying to see her dish under the cloche so I wouldn't have to take any more of her loud, incessant rambling. Has any one contestant ever had THAT many talking heads in an ep before?

Seriously, her voice is still ringing in my head. Somewhere she's still talking.

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I watched Food Truck Face Off, a Canadian show filmed mostly in Toronto as I recall.  I looked at the picture of the judges on the FN site and recognized Steak Shapiro whom I liked but not the other two even though the female does look like Robyn.  Most of the episodes I saw had Steak, an older woman whose name I can't remember and a food truck guy from Toronto.  I wonder if Robyn's "season" wasn't shown in the U.S. or I just missed her episodes.  Either way, how on earth was she qualified to be a judge of anything?  She did seem creative on CHopped but I didn't think of her as a professional at all.

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I just saw a preview for a Chopped Grilling episode and it has one of the most annoying chefs ever on it. I don't remember her name, but she's blonde and from Canada. She is rude and hateful to everyone around her, and has a bad case of being able to dish it but not take it. I'm hoping she has calmed down for this one, or I'll be pulling my hair out and cursing the television while hoping she gets chopped first.

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I wonder if Robyn's "season" wasn't shown in the U.S. or I just missed her episodes. 

 

The latter, I think.  They showed episodes shot in different locations and she was in the Miami ones.

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Robyn drove me freaking nuts, because she (to me) was playing a role -- or rather overplaying it to an eye-rolling degree. She had obviously studied the "Chopped" predetermined storyline handbook to exhaustion:

 

Robyn Round 1: "Oh, no! I just wish I had more confidence. My nerves always let me down. I've always looked down on myself and had no confidence. I don't feel like I measure up. I'm just a widdle iddy biddy food truck chef. I'm not worthy! My appetizer wasn't very elevated but gosh darn it, I tried!"

 

Robyn Round 2: "Oh, my goodness! I'm still here! I know I can never make an entree as good as Stephen's. I'm just a food truck chef. I don't even deserve to be standing here! But I do feel like I'm getting my confidence! I won't let my nerves get me down!"

 

Robyn Round 3: "I'm gaining CONFIDENCE! I can't believe little old food truck chef me is still here!  Sigh... but Stephen's so good. I just need to win this because if I don't, it will just reinforce how worthless I am! I've never won anything and nobody has ever believed in me! I MUST WIN CHOPPED FOR MY CONFIDENCE!"

Stephen's food looked really divine in each of the three courses -- and far more sophisticated, honestly -- but he never stood a chance. And I really hate the clear implication in this particular episode that because Stephen had achieved so much, that somehow he was 'elite' or 'snobby' -- the irony is, he had obviously brought himself up from very little as well and deserves whatever success he has earned.

 

The funny part was watching how the editors were obviously trying for a "Stephen the Snob" versus "Plucky Little Robyn" but he was honestly pretty kind throughout the whole thing, very encouraging of her, never really trash-talked beyond, "I think my food is better," and it was interesting that each time they filed back in, Stephen was the one who held the door for his fellow chefs each time.

 

I wish he'd been on a different episode. I just didn't buy that he actually lost this one. He lost to Robin's storyline, not to her food.

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It seemed like all three of the guys were throwing shade at Robyn's lacking-confidence shtick.  In the stew room (?) they were giving her the side eye because really, people who lack confidence typically don't perform a one-woman comedy routine with 5 "balls jokes" in a row for three total strangers.  

 

And Robyn, take it easy on the balls+balls+balls.  This is supposed to be a safe show to watch with my 8 yr old. 

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I wish he'd been on a different episode. I just didn't buy that he actually lost this one. He lost to Robin's storyline, not to her food.

 

yes, a thousand times.   the story was the plucky food truck owner proves herself to be not only as good as, but BETTER THAN, chefs who work in fancypants restaurants.  

 

I guess it was supposed to be a heart-warming story.  The problem was that the "heroine"  of the story came across crass and annoying. 

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And Robyn, take it easy on the balls+balls+balls.  This is supposed to be a safe show to watch with my 8 yr old. 

I couldn't believe it when they were waiting to be called back & Robyn kept talking about how she thought the guys would all be good with balls. I mean, WTF? If the situation was reversed & it was a bunch of women & one man & he kept talking about how he thought they would all be good with breast meat in that "amirite?" kind of tone, it would be completely unacceptable.

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This is supposed to be a safe show to watch with my 8 yr old.

 

So how do you handle the commercial they keep running during Chopped for a product for sex after menopause?  That makes me cringe and I live alone.  If one of my adult children was here, I'd be embarrassed.  If a child was watching with me, I'd be livid.  Chopped (and all shows on FN) should be safe for family viewing IMO.

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