Meet the Parents: Gil and Kelly Jo Bates

[Meredith Quill]

Your Gil & Kelly Topic!

[CarolMK]

Kelly is pretty likeable in my opinion. I just wish she would change her hairstyle so that she doesn't look so much like MIchelle Duggar.

Gil is all right, too. He doesn't seem to have a huge ego the way Jim Bob Duggar does and actually likes his kids.

[SpaghettiTuesdays]

Thank God Gil doesn't make all the sexual innuendos (or straight up sex talk).

 

I wonder if we'll see them dry humping at a mini-golf course.

[JessDVD]

I hope this doesn't end up to be an untrue statement because I'm not sure I wouldn't have made it about Jim Bob 10 years ago... but Gil & Kelly are WAY too classy to ever do that. I also have the vague impression that G & K care more about how the public perceives them, than JB & M do.

[cereality]

I think it helps that their kids aren't particularly scared of the. So if it gets to the point where they're all over each other or making sex comments, I see Alyssa or Carlin or Tory having no problem telling them "um -- that looks like you're trying to have sex, we don't need to see that" or "actually Dad -- hooking up means . . . is that really what you wanted to say?"

[Carolyn15]

I just like Kelly and Gil They just seem so much more involved and loving to the kids than Michelle and JB do.. I don't think I have heard the "buddy" system with the Bates.. Love that the kids all have outside interest,jobs and that the kids are able to education  ( I belive I read that some place ) beyond the home schooling. 

[KarmaG]

New to this show and am digging it so far. Kelly doesn't annoy me instantaneously like Michelle did. I can't watch more than a few moments of the Duggar's but am into my third episode of Bates. However I always try not to compare families i.e. Duggars and Bates, Browns (Sister Wives) and Williams (My Five Wives) even though I have personal preferences while watching.

[wanderwoman]

I'm watching the Thanksgiving invasion of Grandpa and Grandma Bates' house while I simulaneously nurse and read (I'm multitasking!). Does anyone else think Gil's mom is king of over the size if the family. Lol. Within two minutes, she cracked several comments about their fuzzy itinerary, her home being wrecked, the mass quantities of food they consume, and "too many children". I like her!

[Absolom]

I think we've seen Jane (I think that's her name) twice on different Bates shows and so far she's never minced words on being overrun by the horde of offspring that Gil and Kelly bring to her house.  They should have listened to her years ago. :)

[HumblePi]

Holy Crapola!  I was watching A&E and saw the commercial for this show, Bringing Up Bates. I didn't even know this was an actual series and I was stunned because when I saw the family I thought to myself 'those people look very familiar' then remembered that I saw them on 19 Kids and Counting.  They're the same cult, the same damned thing the Duggars are. I will never watch this show, never!!!

[KarmaG]

Holy Crapola!  I was watching A&E and saw the commercial for this show, Bringing Up Bates. I didn't even know this was an actual series and I was stunned because when I saw the family I thought to myself 'those people look very familiar' then remembered that I saw them on 19 Kids and Counting.  They're the same cult, the same damned thing the Duggars are. I will never watch this show, never!!!

 

Congrats?! And no they aren't the same thing. If you did watch the show you'd know this. However, since your mind is made up there's no point in pointing out the differences.

 

As for me, I am happy season 2 is about to start.

[lookeyloo]

They are certainly more palatable to watch, and I am watching, but, as pretty a family as they are, they share the same beliefs as the Duggars.  Maybe they interpret things differently, if that is possible.  

[gunderda]

They seem to be a little more relaxed and their kids seem to have their own opinions.  However that's just appearances so who knows what really goes on behind the scenes.   I guess what i'm saying is they act more normal and I don't think if you knew they were connected to the duggars that you would think they shared the same religion. 

[absolutelyido]

They are certainly more palatable to watch, and I am watching, but, as pretty a family as they are, they share the same beliefs as the Duggars.  Maybe they interpret things differently, if that is possible.

 

 

One of the things I like about Gil and Kelly is that they appear to me to be equal partners in their marriage. I don't get the sense that Kelly is afraid to express her opinion or that Gil would want or expect her to. I know that their beliefs are supposedly that a woman should be subservient to her husband, but I really don't see that in their relationship. (And Kelly doesn't use that baby-happy voice that Michelle Duggar does.)

[CarolMK]

One thing to also remember for those new to the show, Kelly did say early on that their children would respect the rules of their house while still living there, but when they moved out and married that some will choose to do things differently. We've seen this in that Zach is letting baby Bradley have Winnie the Pooh decorations/stuffed animals in his house, and Alyssa has been seen wearing jeans (not on the show, but on her instagram account). Zach and Whitney didn't wait until marriage to kiss but the Bates didn't seem to make a huge big deal out of it, either. I'm sure we'll see some more difference as time goes on. One thing I thought was refreshing too, was seeing Gil's 50th birthday party with some of the men he'd gone to college with attending. We never saw any of that when the Duggars had their show, the kids always had to do exactly what their parents believed (side hugs, ad nausem) and they were not allowed to have any independent thoughts of their own.

[HumblePi]

It's the same thing, only the names are different. Call a giraffe a donkey and it will still be a giraffe.

 

[farmgal4]

I hope this doesn't end up to be an untrue statement because I'm not sure I wouldn't have made it about Jim Bob 10 years ago... but Gil & Kelly are WAY too classy to ever do that. I also have the vague impression that G & K care more about how the public perceives them, than JB & M do.

I think the Bates' egos are several sizes smaller than the Duggar's.

One thing to also remember for those new to the show, Kelly did say early on that their children would respect the rules of their house while still living there, but when they moved out and married that some will choose to do things differently. We've seen this in that Zach is letting baby Bradley have Winnie the Pooh decorations/stuffed animals in his house, and Alyssa has been seen wearing jeans (not on the show, but on her instagram account). Zach and Whitney didn't wait until marriage to kiss but the Bates didn't seem to make a huge big deal out of it, either. I'm sure we'll see some more difference as time goes on. One thing I thought was refreshing too, was seeing Gil's 50th birthday party with some of the men he'd gone to college with attending. We never saw any of that when the Duggars had their show, the kids always had to do exactly what their parents believed (side hugs, ad nausem) and they were not allowed to have any independent thoughts of their own.

Why would Winnie the Pooh things not be allowed? Does Gothard not allow that either?

[Hero]

I think the Bates' egos are several sizes smaller than the Duggar's.

Why would Winnie the Pooh things not be allowed? Does Gothard not allow that either?

He doesn't wear pants ;)

[OpieTaylor]

Sorry if this has already been discussed, but I'm not seeing or hearing about any home schooling going on for the Bates kids. I think I've watched every episode of this show so far. Is that aspect of their lives just not part of the show, I wonder?

[KarmaG]

Sorry if this has already been discussed, but I'm not seeing or hearing about any home schooling going on for the Bates kids. I think I've watched every episode of this show so far. Is that aspect of their lives just not part of the show, I wonder?

 

True, it's an aspect of their lives but not part of the show. 

[trimthatfat]

Sorry if this has already been discussed, but I'm not seeing or hearing about any home schooling going on for the Bates kids. I think I've watched every episode of this show so far. Is that aspect of their lives just not part of the show, I wonder?

The last episode detailed the home schooling experience. I didn't see a thread on it in this forum so I'll just talk about it here. Kelly home schools all of the children - they have what is basically a computer room for the younger children to watch instructional videos and the older kids have their own laptops that they use to do homework in the living room. They showed Kelly teaching one of the children (Carlin?) the periodic table. It probably helps that Kelly has a background in the sciences and math so I feel like the children get a decent STEM education.

 

I love that Kelly said that she wants her children to go to college. I am disappointed that the only college the children seem to attend is Crown College though. They could easily find another Christian university to attend. I imagine at least one of the older kids will want to. I think both Kelly and Gil attended private Baptist colleges so I wonder if the kids have looked into attending one of those schools.

Edited July 25, 2015 by trimthatfat

[Sew Sumi]

They both started at Anderson College in South Carolina, then transferred to Carson Newman in TN. I agree; why don't their kids look into following in their parents' footsteps? Or are their educations actually lacking in some way that would be exposed by the SAT? 

 

That said, I almost fell off the couch when I saw the periodic table and the balancing of equations going on. I missed what Kelly majored in in college, but did catch that her minor was SPED, which may help her a bit with the kids who have LDs. The episode preview Comcast had said that Kelly was going to discuss Addee's hearing loss, but that never happened. I wonder how (or if) it affects Kelly's teaching? 

[andromeda331]

That said, I almost fell off the couch when I saw the periodic table and the balancing of equations going on.

 

So did I and one of the girls had a biology book. I'd be curious how close the book is to a

normal school one but at least their learning and are being educated. I too wondered why

they only can go to Crown College and not even the ones their parents went too.  There's

tons of other Christian colleges they could go to.

[riverblue22]

I noticed in this last show that several members of the Bates family have braces, including Kelly herself.  I have a feeling this is a result of the show bringing in more money.

[KarmaG]

I noticed in this last show that several members of the Bates family have braces, including Kelly herself.  I have a feeling this is a result of the show bringing in more money.

 

It's been mentioned in their talking heads that they get a discount for each person that gets braces, and a larger discount each time a new Bates gets the braces.

[Carolyn15]

Sorry this has nothing to do with the show. I got a flyer at home for Crown Collage. It is Minnesota so I am not sure if it is the same one that Gill and Kelly went to. I am not sure why I got this never have looked into schools .

[Sew Sumi]

No, Crown College in MN is not affiliated with the one in TN. From what I've heard, the one in MN is practically heathen compared to the one in TN. Gil and Kelly never went to either: they started at Anderson Community College in South Carolina, then transferred to Carson Newman in TN. 

[farmgal4]

After watching today's marathon, I have decided that the Bates are as different from the Duggars as black is from white. I know the Bates are supposed to be Gotthardites and all that, so I guess there has to be some similarities, but I love the Bates to death. The more I come to love the Bates, the more I come to hate the Duggars. Gil and Kelly truly love and care for all of their kids and want the very best for them. They want their kids to do whatever would make them happy with their lives. They want them to venture out and go to college and go to work and learn to fly and etc., etc. Watching Gil and Kelly and their kids together make me feel really bad for the Duggars kids. Dim Boob and Clown Car have ruined their kids lives and they don't even give a damn.

[CarolMK]

Gil and Kelly just seem much more down to earth and humble than Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar. The Duggars have an undertone of arrogance and we're holier than you atttitude that is hard to  swallow. Gil has real friends, it was nice seeing them come out for his 50th birthday party. And Kelly is close with her sisters, I've enjoyed seeing them and her mom on the show. Despite the fact that the 2 families follow the same beliefs and both have 19 children, they do seem very different from one another. 

[Autumn0516]

The Bates don't side hug either. I think a lot of the Duggars strict rules about boys/girls touching came from what happened with Josh. The Bates seem to be very relaxed and normal about hugs and other physical things, which is nice to see. The girls also had iPhones. Do the Duggar kids have phones?

Edited August 21, 2015 by Autumn0516

[farmgal4]

The Bates don't side hug either. I think a lot of the Duggars strict rules about boys/girls touching came from what happened with Josh. The Bates seem to be very relaxed and normal about hugs and other physical things, which is nice to see. The girls also had iPhones. Do the Duggar kids have phones?

I think I read somewhere that the girls have iPhones, but the boys only have flip phones. I guess because Nike.

[Sew Sumi]

Lawson has an Iphone and social media. I haven't seen either Nathan (who may well be courting now, we know he's got a "get to know" girlfriend) or Trace, who's 18, or close to it, with phones. 

 

Tori and Carlin have been spotted with phones, but I'm not sure if they're sharing. They and Kelly all post under the batesfam account. 

[Malvina]

[CarolMK]

That's a very cute picture, of all the grandkids. They will end up with quite a few before they're done so it's nice they're enjoying it while they can still fit everybody on their laps.

[BitterApple]

I'm going to be the horrible person and say it, but Alyssa's daughter looks "off" to me. Maybe she's just a serious kid but she always appears zoned out in every picture I've seen of her.

[Absolom]

She seems so much taller for her age than the boys in that photo.  Well her father is a very tall so she may be taking after him. 

[lookeyloo]

Gosh I don't think she looks "off".  She doesn't in any of the other pictures of her they have posted.  Maybe they caught her at just the wrong timing of an expression.

[IndianPaintbrush]

I don't think she looks off either.  She wasn't that cute a baby, but she's growing into her looks.

Trolls were making hateful comments about Allie on Instagram.  That's part of why Alyssa shut it down.  

[Sew Sumi]

I think that people's comments about Allie stem from the fact that she's never smiling in pictures. Some kids are more serious; I know I wasn't a very smiley infant/toddler/kid. But then, my life pretty much sucked due to circumstances way beyond my control until I was in middle school. Despite being totally spoiled, Allie apparently just isn't a very smiley baby/toddler. Watch Lexie Mae (the rumored name....UP apparently posted it, Alyssa got wind of it, and UP removed it) be another Bradley. 

[Absolom]

My granddaughter was a grumpy cat for about the first 18 months.  She's solemn in almost every photo.  Now she's smiling and laughing a lot of the time.  Allie may perk up in a few months.  She also has some stiff competition from those exceptionally cute two boy cousins. 

[Sew Sumi]

I just also thought about the touch factor. I was an adoptee. I had time with my birth mother, but I was also a premie, and I do not know the time lapse between the time my birth mother actually gave me up and the time my adoptive parents received me (6 months old). 

I repel from hugs in adult life. It's hard to even fake it.  I was never tested for autism or any of its deratives, because those conditions weren't an issue when I was a kid. I had a shitty life and developed distrust of pretty much everyone. 

The smile? It's been hard to crack, but when given, it's been noted. I don't begrudge Allie Jane her grumpy pics. She will be noted as a star when her beautiful smile emerges. :)

As for me now, all you get is a mouth closed smile. The last best pics of me are from the aughts. 

Edited October 4, 2016 by Sew Sumi

[Barb23]

What a darling picture & no one is crying. 

[Kiss my mutt]

From what I see of Alyssa, she seems pretty solemn and doesn't wear a permanent-grin on her face like some of other Bates daughters. Maybe her daughter is mirroring back what she sees.  

[IndianPaintbrush]

Happy 50th birthday to Kelly.  New hair looking good!

 

[BitterApple]

That's a really nice picture. Kelly looks like Erin's brunette twin.

[sheshark]

Kelly was a gorgeous young woman, and is a good-looking grandmother.

[answerphone]

Did anyone else think of the Bates and Duggar families when they saw the controversial video and pictures this weekend (the young man in the red hat...)?

[floridamom]

What controversial video and pictures are you referring to? 

[Me from ME]

I think it is are a reference to the boys from Covington, Kentucky facing off the Native American Army vet who was doing a traditional drumming.

[IndianPaintbrush]

Other than the fact that the Bates live in Kentucky and probably all voted for Trump, I'm not seeing the connection. The Bates' brand of evangelicalism isn't very friendly towards Catholics. And I think the Bates are too media-savvy to be seen on camera wearing MAGA hats.