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S02.E08: Chunks Of My Soul


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I haven't read the last few pages of comments on here, so forgive me if this has already been mentioned, but I just now got a chance to watch the final show and really need to comment. I am from the Santa Barbra area where Tori and her friends went for her little outing. I lived right across the road from the antique store in Los Alamos she was in and have worked for years in the Santa Ynez Valley. where there are all kinds of ranches and little farms that raise miniature horses, little goats, pigs, etc. You can stop at these places while wine tasting and it's a super beautiful area, but I'll tell you now, there is no way in hell any of these animal owners would allow this nut case to take home a 5 day old piglet! There something really wrong with this whole final episode, but one thing is very clear. Tori is nuts and needs serious help. Dean could EASILY get custody of those kids with just showing the courts this final show.. He needs to pack those kids up and get them away from her. She's no mother from what I see.. She never even acknowledged those kids upon coming home with that poor little pig! All she cares about is herself. THATS IT! The shock on her ugly mug in that quack Dr Wexlers office when Dean just stood up and walked out because the bitch WOULD NOT let up on the 'friend' of Deans from his meetings was very telling. She realized right there that her little lap dog off a husband that would cry out how sorry he was and how much he loves her and wanted so much to fix this FINALY grew a pair and wasn't going to take her crap anymore. Oh but that didn't stop this skinny narcissistic bitch from trying one more tactic that never failed yet, and that was to get sick so he would love and take care of her. That worked for a few min., did ya see ? He coddled and babied her . But then, he told her how great everything was at home while she was in the hospital , and then really nothing. No clear finale like you normally see on a show. Not at all like last season. The shows finali. would,t END! Something is going on and I hope it's Dean sticking to his guns and thinking of getting out and away from this crazy bitch.

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...

- Wexler. Fucking Wexler. The bloated, disgruntled elephant in the room that shows up 40 minutes late because he's tired of this bullshit gets a "here's an exercise! Tell me how Tori feels!" At first I thought she was trying to appease Tori and keep her reputation intact on camera with all her non-committal mewing. Now I just think she's horrible at her job. Horrible. The departure for me was the episode where it is so obvious that her not wanting to "leave her kids with Dean" was really about not wanting to be a shitty mother to them like her mother was. She spoon-fed that analysis to Wexler when she mentioned her mother and not wanting to make the same mistakes, then talked about her reticence with leaving for the weekend. Then Wexler let her divert the issue back to Dean?!?! It had NOTHING to do with him. Funny how she then easily allowed her kids to be with him for two weeks!

...

- Wexler. Again, fucking Wexler. Tori is essentially having a forced panic attack with her agent, the same kind I would have with my mom when I was pretending to be sick in middle school. Wexler rolls her eyes so the camera and the audience sees that she sees through it, then does the slightest mewing confrontation "Oh. So this might affect whether you get work. Hmmm." Then, she allows Tori to blame it all Dean. "Sure, if it weren't for the fact that you were cheated on, you totally would have gotten your shit together and had a booming career" It was shitty of Wexler to roll her eyes behind her client's back, but then to not follow it up with some real insight? Incompetent.

Great post, sowkkat. I'd like to propose that from now on Dr. Wexler is referred to as "Wexler. Again, fucking Wexler." because this is just so accurate and delightful.

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As an aside, as a mom of a 4 year old not only would I have a hard time spending a night away, there is no hospital in the world that could keep me from him for two weeks. But it's because I love the heck out of him and enjoy him so much, not because I'm afraid of being perceived as a bad mom or because I'm putting his needs over mine.

 

Agree with this. When my oldest was about 3 months old I got really really sick. I had a super high fever, and was throwing up, chills and aches, could barely stay awake. I was nursing and not eating and throwing up, so every time I fed him, I felt like I was going to pass out. I went to urgent care and they gave me some antibiotics. After 24 hours nothing had changed and the doctor suggested I admit myself, for IV antibiotics and to get rehydrated. But I just didn't want to leave my baby. I was afraid if I couldn't nurse my milk would dry up, I was worried because my husband worked and we had no family to watch the baby. So I just toughed it out - forced myself to eat some soup and I actually started feeling better later that evening. It took me awhile to fully recover, though. 

 

Anyhow, I'm not saying a mother (or father) shouldn't go get medical care if they genuinely need it. And I probably did, and maybe it was stupid that I refused to go. But I was thinking of my son. Always. I always think of my children first. Tori, on the other hand, seems to JUMP at the chance to rush off the hospital. Her kids are going to start thinking she works there. There's no way you could keep me away from my kids for 2 weeks unless I was at death's door, and I'm pretty sure she wasn't. 

 

Heck, even when she has a migraine or a cold...we see her holed up in that dark room for days on end. Who's watching the kids then? Moms get sick, I know. Tori IS sick. Always. And she will freak out about Dean watching the kids any other time, but when her dramatic medical issues flare up, she doesn't even bat an eye about leaving the kids. 

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Dean needs to refuse counseling with Dr. Wexler. He needs to find a therapist of his own for one on one and tell Tori if she wants to continue couples therapy, they will have to seek a new therapist.  Some people make a mistake getting together and really have no business staying together. They both need to move on before they damage those kids any further.   I could not imagine growing up in a household with that kind of insecurity and negativity. 

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I believe Dean does have his own therapist, but he does not televize the sessions. I do agree they should NOT be seeking couples therapy from the incompetent boob who has been "treating" Tori for decades. That's a bit of a conflict of interest, if you ask me. 

 

 

I just have to say, if I didn't already love my username, I would totally change it to "Chunks of my Soul". 

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Dean was so right about her bringing chaos, randomly. I had seen pictures of her with a spotted white pot belly pig and she mentioned having a "pig again," what happened to that pig??!!  A pig is the very last thing she should be allowed to have, ever.

True story: Tori's last pig now lives with Patrick Dempsey and his family (along with some other prop pets she lost use for).

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This baby pig is just one more reason I can't stand Tori.  I have watched all of her reality shows (what can I say, I love me some trainwreck TV) & the countless amount of animals she has brought in & out of her kids lives is appalling.  If you aren't equipped to take responsibility for an animal for the long haul then you don't fucken get one.   If your life is so chaotic that you are wondering how you are going to manage your 4 children without more than one babysitter for8 days then what makes her think she can care for a helpless 5 day old pig.  If the point of all of this was to show us all (the viewers) what a kind, selfless heart Tori has, then it backfired bigtime.

 

I nearly threw my remote at the TV when Wexler let Tori blame Dean for why she isn't reliable enough to book work.

 

I'm glad Dean told Tori she is the reason for the chaos in the house LOL.  In the earlier shows, Dean was constantly giving in to Tori in an effort to make her happy & it was nice to see some backbone from him.

 

I was giving the hubs a rundown on the show, he came in while I was watching it.  His theory is the amount of bleach it takes to get Tori's hair that color may be seeping into her scalp & causing her migraines & insanity.  He could be on to something :)

Edited by Lucygirl2
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They both need to move on before they damage those kids any further.   I could not imagine growing up in a household with that kind of insecurity and negativity.

Yes. And while we're on the subject of the kids.....I find it tragic that these kids are allowed to be on this show in the first place, and that's on both Tori and Dean. The only thing these kids are getting out of this experience is the lesson that nothing that happens in their lives is valid unless it's happening on camera. Just So Gross.

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I was a social worker for years in a residential setting for adults. One trend we noticed was a lot of exaggerating illnesses, especially for doctors....Tori might also have this habit because Candy paid more attention to a sick little girl than a healthy one. Maybe when Tori was sick she got more nurturing and hugs and whatever else she lacked otherwise.

I agree that people like Tori do what they do because of a childhood experience, but from what I've read, it's more common when a child is abused or emotionally manipulated as a child. For children in those environs, an illness may be the first time an adult gave them nurturing or put them in a dependable, safe environment (like a hospital). In a hospital, there's peace and a regularity that sometimes doesn't exist elsewhere. At a doctor's office, mom or dad can't hurt you. In Tori's case, I think it's a classic "mom and dad weren't there when they were there" sort of thing. I also think Tori is increasingly overwhelmed by and incapable of parenting. She brings chaos and throws money at the kids because, when things are drama free and peaceful, she can't play the part of an overwhelmed, victimised mom.

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I'll admit I only watch a few clips of this show, but I read the posts here and I'm just baffled by it all. First, the title of this episode? Really? Also, I think I commented about this on TWOP--it's amazing how Dean is turning out to be the "good" guy here, massive flaws and all. 

 

The pig thing breaks my heart. We used to farm and we raised and sold pigs. We never had more than six at a time and the smell was horrendous. I can't imagine what a slaughterhouse would smell like, or that Tori would go near one. The whole thing doesn't make sense. Besides, the death of a pet is upsetting enough--why document it for TV? Weird doesn't even cover some of this ish. 

 

As for Tori's issues, I've been wondering if it's a chicken or the egg type thing. There's a mental illness (the name escapes me) where the person has to have drama in his or her life. It's a form of narcissism. If the drama isn't present, the person will create it--they literally can't function without some kind of exacerbated conflict in their life that usually involves a lot of attention being focused on the person in the center of the drama, aka the creator of said drama. So has Tori always been like this and her parents had difficulty dealing with this type of personality? Or did her parents create the personality aspect? IDK--there's no cure for narcissism. No pill or therapy that will correct the problem. Not defending Wexler at all--blaming Dean for Tori's inability to accept that she's at fault for a lot of the issues in her life is heinous for sure--but maybe Wexler realizes that Tori's not going to change, that she's incapable of it. So she tries to deal with her on her level. Which still makes her a horrible therapist and an opportunist. Ugh.

 

Like everyone else, I feel really bad for the kids. I can't imagine how having a histrionic mother will affect them. To have it all documented on TV and the internet...it's so very wrong. 

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Also, I think I commented about this on TWOP--it's amazing how Dean is turning out to be the "good" guy here, massive flaws and all.

 

Dean is not the good guy. MaryJo was right that's he's exhausting. Dean is a serial cheater who uses claims of drug addiction and threats of suicide to control the people around him. In practical terms, he comes off as a better parent than Tori, but he's still a jerk. He's incredibly manipulative and rather smart, where Tori is stupid and just acts out and melts down. He wanted his creepy friend from rehab to be the new babysitter.

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I never watched any Tori and Dean product until just last night, because other posters referred to their previous shows and I was curious as to how this shitshow came to be. It was an episode of "Tori and Dean Hollywood" or something like that? Anyway, she was prepping cookies for Liam's elaborate 3 year birthday party. Dean called her out for only going above and beyond to look good for the other moms, not because she actually cared about her kid's birthday. He made the point that he's three and he won't notice. It was a huge dig and Tori was totally offended, probably because it rang true and Dean was onto her. It totally showed her narcissism, even back then. It also showed Dean walking away in a huff, as is his wont. Poor kids.

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I think that she's always been crazy, but it's gotten worse in the last however many years. She tries to blame her current deteriorated mental/emotional state on Dean's affair, but I think it's really a combination of the natural progression of untreated mental illness, the increased stress of parenting additional/older children, the ongoing problems in her relationship with Dean (which predate the affair), etc., etc. I doubt that any of her issues are new. She's been hoarding for over 20 years and she's had the eating disorder(s) for at least that long. If she doesn't get some serious help (NOT Wexler), things are going to continue to go downhill as she's increasingly unable to earn a living, Dean leaves, the kids get older, she gets older, and so on. I don't wish death on her at all, but I wouldn't be shocked if she ended up dying in a Brittany Murphy situation or worse.

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There's a mental illness (the name escapes me) where the person has to have drama in his or her life. It's a form of narcissism. If the drama isn't present, the person will create it--they literally can't function without some kind of exacerbated conflict in their life that usually involves a lot of attention being focused on the person in the center of the drama, aka the creator of said drama.

 

That would be Borderline Personality Disorder and I do think Tori shows some signs of that--however, one of the many symptoms of that (and the most common, in my experience in the psych field) is self-mutilation.  Of course we may never know if she has/or does this but she hits a good many other symptoms such as need for constant chaos with her as the center focus, abandonment issues, lack of interest in other people's problems, the "either or" mode of thinking (if you're not my friend, you're my enemy) and the inability to have those around her all getting along--its either Dean and Tori vs Candy, Dean and Tori vs her friends or Tori and her friends against Dean, etc.  Dr. Wexler should have seen those signs years ago and started some specialized therapy to address these issues.  

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^^^ Exactly. The constant goddamn triangulating. She was nearly short of breath after oh so quickly galloping over to Mary Jo at the party in her eagerness to initiate some MJ and herself vs Candy.

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This is the first & only episode I have watched of this season...and the last. I had thought of going to On Demand for the others but do not think I can handle them. This one turned my stomach.

These are two very sick people who have no business being together. They have brought four adorable children into this world and are destroying their lives.

I remember reading all the gossip when he cheated on her..she is still treating it as if it happened last month. If you want your marriage to work out than get over it & get on with your lives. I cannot believe that therapist is not telling her that living with one foot in yesterday & the other foot obsessing over tomorrow, you are pissing all over today.

I hope that story line about that baby pig was just that...a story...and that he did not really die. What happened to the chickens they use to have that she was so in love with?

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That would be Borderline Personality Disorder and I do think Tori shows some signs of that--however, one of the many symptoms of that (and the most common, in my experience in the psych field) is self-mutilation.

 

I am no expert, but I wonder if the anorexia could fall into this category? I know it's not exactly the same, but she IS harming her body none-the-less. 

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I am no expert, but I wonder if the anorexia could fall into this category? I know it's not exactly the same, but she IS harming her body none-the-less.

 

Good point and it could be part of it.  People with Borderline Personality D/O usually have a cluster of other personality disorders as well, and anorexia could be a separate issue (such as control) or part of this (such as bringing attention to herself).  I once worked with a psychiatrist who said he had never treated an anorexic who didn't have severe "mother issues."  Case in point.

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I'm deeply saddened to log on this morning and see no new snark because the finale aired.

What ever shall I do with all the new found free time?!

*damn autocorrect

Edited by kelm
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I remember Charlie saying both Aaron and Candy warned him about marrying Tori. I think she has always been like this.

Wow, that pretty much sums it up, doesn't it? I can totally see it thougn. Bitch is an emotiohal vampire.

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I'm deeply saddened to log on this morning and see no new snark because the finale aired.

What ever shall I do with all the new found free time?!

*damn autocorrect

 

Yes, I need one trainwreck reality show to add some spice.  What's next?  House of DVF was a boring, unsatisfactory replacement.

 

With the season over I think it's safe to say that there is not and never was a "fairytale romance."  And just in case there was any doubt Mary Jo spoke to the subject in an invited appearance saying that Dean was "determined" (in other words a fame-seeking whore attracted to the Spelling name and fortune.)  Therefore if any further reality show deals get made I think they must be under the condition that Tori never utters the "F" word again because we're all sick of hearing it.

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With the season over I think it's safe to say that there is not and never was a "fairytale romance."  And just in case there was any doubt Mary Jo spoke to the subject in an invited appearance saying that Dean was "determined" (in other words a fame-seeking whore attracted to the Spelling name and fortune.)  Therefore if any further reality show deals get made I think they must be under the condition that Tori never utters the "F" word again because we're all sick of hearing it.

Yes, the most shocking and devastating revelation of this chapter of True Tori was that... THE FAIRY TALE IS A LIE!!! Tori and Dean aren't magical soul mates; they're just a regular FUCKED UP AND DYSFUNCTIONAL COUPLE. I'm still reeling and my head is spinning. If T & D aren't a fairy tale romance, how can anyone be? Is love just a lie?!?!?

 

I FLOVED Mary Jo's subtle but effective shade throwing with the "Dean was very determined..." remark. Tori picked up on it right away, so it is obviously something she's thought of. I have no doubt that Dean was gold/fame-digging big time when he hooked up with her, though, like all effective gold diggers, he did make a genuine connection with her on some levels. At this point, I think that Dean is crystal clear in his mind that Tori is not his "soul mate;" he is not madly in love with her; and, in fact, he can barely stand her. And he didn't even get to be a big (or even medium sized) star in Hollywood.

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The fact that Tori brought a knife to her first meeting with Mary Jo tells me that Tori really does think that her life is a lifetime movie. I wouldn't be surprised if she thinks Dean is trying to kill her so he can run away with her good twin who is still locked away in the Spelling mansion. Boy won't he be surprised to find out that Tori killed her years ago and has assumed her identity. Of course she had too because of the illegitimate baby.

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The fact that Tori brought a knife to her first meeting with Mary Jo tells me that Tori really does think that her life is a lifetime movie. I wouldn't be surprised if she thinks Dean is trying to kill her so he can run away with her good twin who is still locked away in the Spelling mansion. Boy won't he be surprised to find out that Tori killed her years ago and has assumed her identity. Of course she had too because of the illegitimate baby.

Curse you, nc socialworker, you don't get to toss something like that out there and then not add you're already working on the screenplay for Lifetime.  Tori could play Dr. Wexler's role, because the lead in this particular gem calls out for Shannen Doherty

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Can anyone explain why she was at the hospital for "2 weeks".  I have a chronically ill child.  We are in and out of the hospital a lot, and there is no way a hospital would keep us for 2 weeks with no real diagnosis.  They always send us home to treat from home.  What hospital was this?  Seems so odd to me.

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I have worked as a hospital social worker for 25 years and my husband is a physician. There is no way in hell that stay was paid for by insurance. There are things a doctor can document to squeeze another day out of a hospital stay but not two weeks. I guarantee that was private pay or it was a psych stay. I wonder if her father or mother are donors to that hospital? That could also be a factor . Just like everything on this show the hospitalization backfired on Tori. Instead of the public thinking " wow 2 weeks, she must really be sick". Everyone knows it's insane to ask us to beleive her illness warranted a two week stay. We used to joke about patients like her saying if the hospital could only float it would be a cruise ship because some people thought it was a vacation.

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Since we all agree she is a narcissistic hypochondriac, and pretty much certifiable, I'm really starting to question her 2 week hospital stay.  It is not entirely outside the realm of possibility that she faked the length of her hospital stay.  Could she have exaggerated how long she was in for the show?  I would believe private paid via bank of Candy, and I would also believe a psych stay.... but I'm beginning to wonder if she wasn't really in for 2 weeks.  It would have been easy enough to be filmed going in, and doing another shoot re-enacting her discharge and arrival home.  As others mentioned previously, that was no regular hospital room that we were shown - dog on the bed, etc. 

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Since we all agree she is a narcissistic hypochondriac, and pretty much certifiable, I'm really starting to question her 2 week hospital stay. It is not entirely outside the realm of possibility that she faked the length of her hospital stay. Could she have exaggerated how long she was in for the show? I would believe private paid via bank of Candy, and I would also believe a psych stay.... but I'm beginning to wonder if she wasn't really in for 2 weeks. It would have been easy enough to be filmed going in, and doing another shoot re-enacting her discharge and arrival home. As others mentioned previously, that was no regular hospital room that we were shown - dog on the bed, etc.

I wonder that too

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I read in my US Weekly that she was apparently VERY upset that Dean did not visit her more, stay with her and dote on her constantly. I guess it's perfectly fine to leave the 4 children to the nanny when it's all about Tori. Otherwise, Dean is a deadbeat dad who cannot even pick up his child from school. 

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I don't think that she was hospitalized two weeks. At most, a day or two and she spent the rest relaxing at a hotel. I am sure only goes to Cedars Sinai, which is really one of the best hospitals in the world. Although I am sure they make special accomodations for celebs that actually need medical care, I doubt they would risk their reputation by hospitalizing her for two weeks because she needs a vacation from her family. They don't need her money or endorsement.

I don't get the wanting to be babied when sick. I can understand wanting someone who is there to make you soup or run out for ginger ale but things like being spoon fed for no reason doesn't make sense. It is as though she wants Dean to put in more time and care for her than she does for her own children.

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I don't get the wanting to be babied when sick. I can understand wanting someone who is there to make you soup or run out for ginger ale but things like being spoon fed for no reason doesn't make sense. It is as though she wants Dean to put in more time and care for her than she does for her own children.

By her own admission, Tori's ideal lifestyle would be being literally babied by, well, everyone. She wants Dean to spoon feed her, sit by her hospital bed holding her hand, and generally treat her like a critically ill child whether she happens to be "sick" at any given moment or not. Her excuse for why she wants or needs or deserves that kind of treatment is that she didn't get enough babying and handholding when she was a child. She is also bitterly disappointed that Candy is not ever going to turn into the kind of mother that Tori wants- someone who will constantly fawn over Tori and give Tori whatever she wants. The thing is, Tori isn't even close to being that kind of mom to her own kids. She ignores them more than she caters to their needs. Actually, I don't recall ever seeing Tori baby or cater to her kids. She carries Finn around on her hip as a prop/shield, but she treats him more like a sack of potatoes than her precious baby boy. She whines to the kids about herself all the time and yells at them to think about her feelings when they complain that their needs aren't being met. In the scene where Finn was "sick" (I think it was fake), she didn't comfort him at all; she just plopped him down on the bed and continued whining about whatever and Dean cuddled him and asked how he was feeling. When Hattie threw up in the car and vomit got on Liam's iPad, Tori yelled at Liam for complaining and was exasperated and whining about how mean the paparazzi were being to her while she wiped the vomit off of Hattie. There was no comforting or babying of her actual sick baby, just more self-involved whining. When Dean bonked Hattie with the pumpkin and Hattie was crying, Dean held her and comforted her while Tori... bitched and whined while ignoring the child. Yet she has such high expectations/demands for how supportive and comforting everyone is supposed to be toward her at all times.

Edited by TheRealT
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I had a serious car accident my last semester of college and spent nearly three months in a hospital bed, on morphine and in traction, more or less hanging upside down. I can confirm that having my parents spoon feed me - and my grandmother forcing cartons of milk down my throat - pretty much ranks right up there as worst nightmare ever.

 

I did not treat it as a vacation or as a chance to shirk life's responsibilities. I even graduated two months later, on time.

 

But then, I'm not the tragic heroine that Tori is - only a mere mortal.

Edited by RealityCowgirl
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I wonder whether this show, intended to humiliate and punish Dean while helping Tori "find her voice," has actually ended up doing the opposite. I was shocked when Dean actually called her out on creating chaos in the home on camera in the last episode. It seemed like he was biting his tongue a lot more in the earlier episodes and taking all of Tori's shit in order to prove how sorry he was for cheating or whatever. As the season wore on, he had more angry outbursts and called her out more on ignoring her own shortcomings while endlessly harping on his. I'm sure he's seen some of the online commentary "taking his side" and people probably email, tweet, etc. him expressing sympathy, telling him he should leave Tori, and telling him he's a great guy. I wouldn't go so far as to say he's a "great guy," but it never ceases to amaze me how even the scuzziest people on TV have admirers and defenders in the public, so I'm sure there are people out there who think Dean is awesome in his own right, not just compared to Tori.

 

On the other hand, I think Tori's public image is at an all-time low as a result of what she's revealed about herself on the show. People who used to like her or be neutral toward her now think she is a nutjob and an asshole. She's not only shattered whatever image she had going as an "America's Mom" type, she's also shown herself to be generally unreliable to show up for any type of work and likely to be a basketcase if she does show up. That's the part that shocks me the most. Who puts that kind of shit on TV? Her sick quest to be on TV and to get people "on her side" in her endless struggle to be the biggest victim in the world has caused tremendous harm to her personally and professionally and all she wants is more.

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I completely agree, TheRealT. Tori has never looked worse to me than she has over the course of these two seasons. And while I am not nominating Dean for sainthood any time soon, there have been several instances where he has said something and I was all, "Yes! Thank God somebody said it!" She surrounds herself with so many sycophants, and Dean has often been one of them. It's nice to see someone, anyone, calling her on her BS. 

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