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Small Talk: The Library


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(edited)

Birth song: Half-Breed by Cher.  Conception: You're So Vain by Carly Simon.  Funny, I don't think I ever heard either of those songs until I was in my 20s.

 

After five years of being dicked around by the Senior Partners, as of this morning my plant has officially been sold to new (smaller) corporate overloards.  The change in morale in the building is indescribable - it's like Christmas morning. It was totally worth driving in through the ice and snow this morning (for a change!)

Edited by Earl Is Dead
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Congrats on the new regime Earl is Dead!  I hope they are awesome.

 

So my conception song is Funky Town by the Lipps.  Both my parents are very buttoned up people, as a general rule, and so it's kind of hilarious.

 

I love everyone's conception/Birthday songs.  So much fun.

 

Also, today it has been above freezing and the streets are huge puddles.  Normally I'd make a tart complaint about needing gondolas to cross the street, but I am so happy about the above freezing temperature, I'm almost giddy.

 

Happy (almost) Spring everyone!!

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I always assumed that song was Wings--Wikipedia tells me it was just a Paul & Linda song, but it's been released on a few Wings compilations over the years. It's kind of a weird one--two half-songs mushed together.

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After five years of being dicked around by the Senior Partners, as of this morning my plant has officially been sold to new (smaller) corporate overloards.

 

LOL this makes it sound like it was Wolfram & Hart. Glad things are looking up, Earl Is Dead!

 

Birth song: Half-Breed by Cher.  Conception: You're So Vain by Carly Simon.

 

70s AM radio in a nutshell.

 

Good weather vibes to everyone!

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Since Tuesday Mother Nature has dropped rain, sleet, freezing rain, snow, more rain, and now more snow on us.  I'm telling myself she's dumping out the last contents of her purse in preparation for spring.

Funny way to think about it. I hope it's empty after today!

I think it may have just stopped snowing here. We got a bunch.

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Winter has kicked my ass, so sorry for being MIA.

 

Erratic, I am so hapy for you as you begin your new adventure. My friends who went the foster to adopt route just officially adopted their 2 boys. Those boys hit the parent lottery just as any children placed in your home will as well.

 

I just found out that they are closing the office I just transfered to. We will see what happens, it is a way off.

 

My birth song was Theme from a Summer Place (yes I am that old)  wasn't that the song that figured heavily in Oz's romantic fantasy.

 

The last coupld of years I have gone away for my birthday in early April but I think this year there will still probably be mountain sized snow banks. Also money seems to be a little tighter than I would like, I haven't been getting any overtime and though it has been great not working 6 days a week I miss the money.

 

I will try to be better keeping up in hear, (I have been reading but not posting) love you guys.

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Argh. I'm trying to sell my Android smartwatch on eBay (just decided it wasn't my thing). First auction "winner" just never paid, never contacted me. Relisted it, and the second auction "winner" messaged me to say he couldn't pay because he didn't have enough money in his account (he's bidding on eBay when he has less than $300 to his name. Idiot).

 

The third winner contacted me because he saw our city names and realized that we live only about 45 minutes apart, so he wanted to meet in person. He offered to meet at my town's police station (which is, I'm told, what Craigslist recommends since some of their users have ended up robbed or killed, ahem) but I was still concerned about the idea. Paypal takes a big cut, but at least you're protected to a degree. So I told him I'd rather do this online, and now he's backing out because he says he's not "comfortable with the situation." So I am expected to go meet a man I don't know to exchange a large amount of cash for a small, expensive item, but HE'S uncomfortable? That really pisses me off.

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Chyna, your eBay bidders are crackers. I'm sorry you are having such a tough time selling your watch. 

 

So good to see you dusky.  I can imagine how winter is kicking your ass.  With all the news boston has been getting, I've been thinking how New Hampshire and Vermont have probabbly been getting it worse.

 

Erratic, I hope you have something to get you through the weekend. I can't wait for your new crown to drive you less crazy, and possibly one (or more) awesome children to make you happily crazy.

 

I am now on Week 3:  This is the scary week where I don't take any medicine to see what happens.  I hope (and pray) that regular skin cream will be enough.  Otherwise, there will be skin patch tests (?).  But you guys have gotten me through my terrible kpCassandra period thus far.  So in my imagination, I am sending you all moisturizer as a thank you present.  And a Tardis.

 

12 monkeys is messing with my head and I can't get enough of it.  How are others liking it?

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Good healthy skin vibes to KPC. I too hope regular skin cream will be all you need from now on.

 

Also wishing a break in the cold to everyone enduring Fimbulwinter. We're looking at sunny and 70 this weekend out here. Wish I could share it with all of you back east.

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Hey dusky! Nice to see you.

I gladly accept my virtual moisturizing cream and Tardis, KPC. I hope you're done with patches and itching.

Wow Chyna, three out of three. Maybe in your case, fourth time's the charm?

Instead of crazy cold we had crazy wind here the past two days. It took down a thousand trees in Tuscany. Yikes.

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Speaking of Lady Cassandra, we're rewatching Doctor Who with the kids and it's great watching for the second time: Lady C and the Face of Bo both show up in episode 2. Episode 3 features a character played by the same actress who was Gwen in Torchwood, and episode 4 features Toshiko Sato, a character who turns up later in Torchwood. Nifty!

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(edited)

Great seeing you, dusky! Hope you get some time away for your birthday in the Spring. Still thinking warm thoughts for all of you in the ice and snow.

 

Good luck with your eBay adventure, Chyna. I always think that people using eBay is a triumph of trust over distrust, which I assume must prove justified most of the time, even if there are annoyances and let-downs in the process.

 

Dental problems are a bummer, I agree, Erratic. Take it from me as one who could have done better -- take scrupulous care of your teeth, folks, and then take an around the world vacation on the money you will save.

 

Life is bumping into a bit of a pattern here--Dad still doing fairly well, but I guess the realization is dawning for him that he probably won't get much better or be more independent. He's been kind of a strong-willled, opinionated personality his whole life--or I should say, our whole lives--but we have to give him credit that he seems to be practicing acceptance. Or is in denial. Hard to say which. Anyway, we are grateful for this time even though it sure ain't easy. We know it could be a lot lot tougher.

Edited by cko
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I hope everything turns out ok at work, dusky. Those transitions can be stressful.

I consider anything dental related not fun. I'm a rather large wimp when it comes to that. I hope you're feeling better soon, Erratic

Good luck this week, KPC. Sending along more anti-itch vibes.

Sending along serious bidder vibes to Chyna.

I'm glad things are settling down as best they can, cko, and I'll be keeping you and your family in my thoughts.

Not much to report here. Took it easy this weekend. Otherwise have been quite busy lately getting things handled for my mom - am wrapping up with the attorneys and nearly done with the house. There's still a bunch to do but this will be two major items checked off the list.

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It took down a thousand trees in Tuscany.

Oh no!  I hope it was over a big enough area that it doesn't look completely devastated in any one spot trudi-tru.

 

 

but we have to give him credit that he seems to be practicing acceptance. Or is in denial. Hard to say which. Anyway, we are grateful for this time even though it sure ain't easy.

 

My minister once referenced a Bhuddist teacher who had a stroke and couldn't drive his fancy car.  He was angry that he couldn't drive it and then realized his anger was making the people driving him around miserable.  So he changed his mindset to appreciating his "chauffeurs" and being able to enjoy the view.  Once I got over the concept of a Bhuddist teacher owning a BMW I appreciated the reminder that life is what you make it.  Not really sure what to wish you but whatever it is that you need, I hope you receive it cko.

 

Just peeking in to say "hi."  I'm so tired it feels like my eyeballs are going to fall out.  But I must say, London is extraordinary.  Now I know why all those celebrities want a home over there.  It was like a week-long episode of Fantasy Island (minus the tropical weather although in comparison to home....) 

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Great seeing you, dusky! Hope you get some time away for your birthday in the Spring. Still thinking warm thoughts for all of you in the ice and snow.

 

 

 

Life is bumping into a bit of a pattern here--Dad still doing fairly well, but I guess the realization is dawning for him that he probably won't get much better or be more independent. He's been kind of a strong-willled, opinionated personality his whole life--or I should say, our whole lives--but we have to give him credit that he seems to be practicing acceptance. Or is in denial. Hard to say which. Anyway, we are grateful for this time even though it sure ain't easy. We know it could be a lot lot tougher.

Hugs to you cko!

I'm dealing with dad health issues too.I could use some general good vibes for some things we're encountering this week. Thanks!

 

Hi dusky!  Winter has kicked my ass too, so you are not alone. But I know you had it worse than over here.

 

Also wishing a break in the cold to everyone enduring Fimbulwinter. Thanks Darkpool!  The weather has actually been warmer and yes, the snow is slowly melting. It felt like it would never do that.

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Vibes to you, val! We are all here to support and whatever you need. And thanks for the offer, buffyjunkie. That is the perfect wish, since I don't know what I need either, but am grateful to receive it in any form!

 

Snow melting woo hoo! Can Spring be nearing?

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Big vibes to you, val.

 

Once I got over the concept of a Bhuddist teacher owning a BMW

Yeah, that doesn't quite add up.

I'm glad you enjoyed your trip, buffyjunkie. How's the boy doing?

 

A very happy birthday to our wonderful KPC!

Edited by trudi-tru
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My mom's b-day was also yesterday (happy belated, b-day peeps :)). She turned 70, and she's having a hard time with it. She feels like being a person in their 70s seems so much older than a person in their 60s. I think perception-wise, she's kinda right. Ugh. I tried to empathize by mentioning that I thought I might feel weird about turning 50 (4 years away), but that was a mistake. If her daughter is 50, that means she's ancient. Oops. Oh well. I tried. ;)

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My mom said she never minded her own age, but she had a horrible time adjusting when my sister turned 40.

ACC basketball has, as usual, brought the region to a standstill. Three games have been played so far; they've been decided by a total of five points. March Madness -- catch it!

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My grandma once said that she didn't struggle with her own 50th, but when my mom (her oldest) turned 50, that really made her feel old! On the other hand, she lived to see her youngest turn 50 13 years later, so there's that.

 

My mom is also turning 70, a week from tomorrow, so this weekend we're having a big bash for her. My sister and I are finding that our brother, as the baby of the family and a dude, is not great to plan an event with.

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My father seems to have had a personality transplant since turning 70. He is now 76 and is 80% a grumpy old man, which is a shame because he used to be a warm funny guy.

Vibes to all those with more pressing issues than a grumpy father.

In other news, I now have a shiny new porcelain crown. Those 8 days with 3 (!) temporary crowns were fucking awful. I am lucky my sanity survived.

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I'm glad you're feeling better Erratic.

I'm lucky. My mom is pretty good natured. Don't get me wrong, she can be stubborn and has her moments, but overall she is very easygoing and has a good sense of humor. She's lightening up as she ages.

My sister and I are finding that our brother, as the baby of the family and a dude, is not great to plan an event with

My brother is older but the same way. He never wants to give input but, as soon as something is done, he's the first to say it should have been done differently. Such an annoying trait. I've found it's best to give him specific things to do. That seems to work best.

Edited by Endeavour
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My sister and I are finding that our brother, as the baby of the family and a dude, is not great to plan an event with.

 

I have one of those too.  At Christmas I asked him to measure a wall so I could surprise my parents with a new TV.  Since he still lives with them I didn't think it was too hard a request, but instead he asked my father, "What size TV do you think you'd like?" and insisted he'd been secretive about it. 

 

I'm lucky. My mom is pretty good natured. Don't get me wrong, she can be stubborn and has her moments, but overall she is very easygoing and has a good sense of humor. She's lightening up as she ages.

 

I'm happy for you, Endeavour.  I don't look forward to my mom turning 70.  At 68 she has such a negative outlook on everything and it only seems to be getting worse.

 

Happy belated birthday, KPC.  I'm glad it was a hot chocolate-y one.

Edited by Earl Is Dead
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She feels like being a person in their 70s seems so much older than a person in their 60s. I think perception-wise, she's kinda right.

Math-wise as well.

 

he asked my father, "What size TV do you think you'd like?" and insisted he'd been secretive about it.

Well, he did hold back the "as a present" part.

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My sister is exactly the same way. She'd much rather pick out what she wants or have us submit a list so she doesn't understand why some of us like to surprise people. I used to coach her in how to hint around with her kids about a CD or video game and nonetheless she would invariably just come out and ask them. Erg! So frustrating.

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I'm dealing with dad health issues too.I could use some general good vibes

Valny general good vibes coming your and your father's way (hopefully not too late.)

 

 

I'm glad you enjoyed your trip, buffyjunkie. How's the boy doing?

 

I'm a little frustrated and worried Trudi-tru.  Frustrated because he seems to have duplicated in many ways his American life there.  That is, sleep until noon, go to class, then hang out with his "gamer" friends until late.  Lather, rinse, repeat.  Plus we learned that apparently his class grades are based on a single final exam, not an ideal situation for a student who sometimes struggles and probably procrastinates.  His life though. 

 

 

She turned 70, and she's having a hard time with it. She feels like being a person in their 70s seems so much older than a person in their 60s. I think perception-wise, she's kinda right. Ugh. I tried to empathize by mentioning that I thought I might feel weird about turning 50 (4 years away), but that was a mistake. If her daughter is 50, that means she's ancient. Oops. Oh well. I tried. ;)

 

I'm turning 50 sooner than that and must admit to having recently revised to the negative my projection of what the next few decades will be like for me.  I think we do a certain disservice in our denial of the negatives of aging and this country is particularly unsupportive of the elderly.  As you become harder of hearing, less able to see and therefor read and therefor understand, less tolerant of society's popular banal fetishes, less physically attractive, and so forth you become increasingly devalued, ignored, and invisible.  Some charismatic, energetic, exceptional older people are able to rise above those limits but the vast majority of older people probably feel to some degree that negative societal pushback.  To the positive, this revised projection is motivating me to expend more energy planning trips.  I intend to try to squeeze in as many as I can in the next ten years.

 

Sorry, didn't mean to go all negative but the mortality thing is really pushing down on me of late.  While I was on vacation I learned a dear friend has advanced multiple myeloma, the same cancer that killed my father-in-law.  Life is fragile yo'.  Grab it by the horns folks and ride. 

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Firstly, vibes for everyone, and especially for the parents!  And study-now! vibes for the boys.  When does he come home?

 

Also, I am seeing the dermatologist tomorrow and.....the itchy disease has only come back on my elbows and a bit on my hands.  Could this be....the end of My Lady Cassandra Skin Saga?  Will I be able to use regular skin cream instead of thick gloppy stuff?  Can I not be Itchy Queen 2015?   Tune in tomorrow folks, to see what the doctor says!!!

 

LnB, how are things by you?  You've been pretty quiet of late.

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I'm sorry about your friend, buffyjunkie.

You are right about aging. Our society doesn't exactly celebrate old people. And it is tough to accept increasing limitations to what one is able to do, knowing that it is only going to get worse.

 

My Grandma's always "I used to climb trees, now I can barely climb the stairs". And I'm like "you're 88, you're lucky you still can climb the stairs". 

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And it is tough to accept increasing limitations to what one is able to do, knowing that it is only going to get worse.

MS is very much like this. In numerous ways, it's like aging, just decades ahead of schedule.

I hope your Lady Cassandra saga will soon come to a close, KPC :)

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Life is fragile yo'.  Grab it by the horns folks and ride.

 

This, very much so. Thanks for those words, buffyjunkie. I've been having a lot of thoughts about stages of life--of course--and one of them is how do we encourage ourselves to live with joy and vigor while we can, but accept that we might not be able to, and that can be fine. Uh, I might not be able to articulate this, but with Dad, who is still totally lucid, but just doesn't have the mental or physical energy to engage a lot...a lot of my friends say stuff like "Oh, he used to love gardening,  can you give him some books about gardening?" and when I say, "Eh, he doesn't have a lot of attention for reading" say "OH THAT'S SO SAD but don't you want to find him something to be interested in???"

 

I understand the sentiment, but the whole idea that as long as we are healthy, independent and engaged we're great, but once we lose those qualities we are...whatever...is starting to offend me a bit. Not sure what I mean by any of this.

 

Just...well, read buffyjunkie's quote above. Love to all.

 

ETA: I guess it's muddled and related to accepting different stages of life. And not having such a "youth" bias that we stigmatize other stages, which of course, as a society we do, as buffyjunkie and trudi are sayin'. I just want to be careful about not doing the same, like when someone talks about their aunt who is "totally independent at 90" saying THAT'S FANTASTIC (which of course it is) and when someone talks about an elder being housebound saying THAT'S SO SAD because after all they can be enjoying life and who am I to say that is a lesser way to live?

Edited by cko
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I think it's ableism, pretty much. We as a culture are very bad at dealing with and accepting illness, aging, and death. I very much get where you're coming from, cko, because sometimes I get that stuff aimed at me ("Oh, you can't walk around too much? That's so sad...") Well, you know, maybe it isn't sad so much as it just is the way it is. Stigma about illness and aging is more painful to deal with, sometimes, than the actual being sick/getting old.

Let's embrace our differences. :)

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Ah, exactly, AnnieF. You've always been my lodestar when it comes to ableism, but I'd actually never thought of anti-aging as being a form of ableism. Food for thought.

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Not sure what I mean by any of this.

Yet my heart feels it understands you perfectly cko.

 

 

Well, you know, maybe it isn't sad so much as it just is the way it is. Stigma about illness and aging is more painful to deal with, sometimes, than the actual being sick/getting old.

And the eloquent AnnieF once again gets it so right.

 

I am also remembering back to a time when I was in the cafeteria with my Mom and two residents of her apartment complex shared their age and I responded "Wow, I would never have guessed.  blah blah blah."  I totally played into every sexist, ageist, stupid cultural convention when what these fierce older ladies were trying to teach me is "We are NOT dead.  Put aside your assumptions regarding our lives based on age and look at the real US." 

 

The boy will come home mid-May.  I hope he has some good adventues in Italy, which he will visit prior to returning home.

 

Got to run.  Couldn't take my Mom to England so am bringing English tea to Mom.

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Well, you know, maybe it isn't sad so much as it just is the way it is. Stigma about illness and aging is more painful to deal with, sometimes, than the actual being sick/getting old.

 

I love what you guys are saying.  It hate that ageism/ableism is a Thing that also has to be fought.  I wish we, as humans, were better and more compassionate and understanding creatures.

 

In my Lady Cassandra saga, the idea is to keep on doing what I am doing.  And to use the steroid heavy duty cream as needed.  And that with time, ye olde body will settle down, and I won't be all "moisturize me!  Moisturize Me!"  I am very thankful I can vent to you guys about this.

 

Vibes to everyone, and hexes at able-ism and age-ism.  And hexes at all bad isms.

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