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Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

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4 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

I'm okay with a cash bar as long as non-alcoholic beverages are available for free. A few of the weddings I've been to split the difference - they have a cocktail hour before the reception, either with an open bar or select drinks circulating, then a cash bar during the reception.

I went to a wedding where the only "free" drinks were water or punch.  Sodas were part of the cash bar.  This wedding still ranks as the worst wedding I have ever been to.  The bride was 19 and had a set budget.  The buffet was skimpy to begin with, but the real kicker was her bridal party going up for seconds before all of the guests had been served.  I was seated at one of the last tables to go up to the buffet and by the time we got there, it was pitiful.  All of the proteins were gone and what remained was some random sides and sauces.  Everyone else before us loaded up their plates assuming the buffet would be replenished, but that was only happening if someone paid for more food, and that was not in the bride's budget and her parents refused to chip in anything.  

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34 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

The bride was 19 and had a set budget. 

Everyone should have a set budget.  Decide how much you can spend, decide how many people you can host properly, and work with that.  If you want to invite every person you, and your parents, have ever met, you need to figure out a way to host them properly, including feeding them an appropriate amount for the time of day.  If you want a less expensive meal, without booze, brunch is a great idea.   If you can't afford a full meal, hold the wedding midday, offer light snacks, then guests can go on their way by meal time. Don't make me pay for my own food and drink.  

A childhood friend had a small wedding - immediate family only - then they all went to a nice restaurant, where they were given the regular menu.  The guests were shocked/horrified when the server then presented each of them with the check for what they had ordered.  

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We had a nice wedding reception. I paid for everything. I had a pretty good job and my mother and stepfather paid for nothing!

I had to open a few cash envelopes to pay the band.  I went into the bathroom stall to open them!

I had a wicked childhood but chose well in the husband department so lucky me. 
 

If I had a do over I’d get married in church, proceed to the basement for coffee and cake and proceed to the honeymoon!

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1 hour ago, MargeGunderson said:

I am so glad I eloped! 

We didn't elope but there were only a dozen of us at our wedding, including us.   I never did have wedding daydreams about being a bride, not my thing.

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1 hour ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I went to a wedding where the only "free" drinks were water or punch.  Sodas were part of the cash bar.  This wedding still ranks as the worst wedding I have ever been to.  The bride was 19 and had a set budget.  The buffet was skimpy to begin with, but the real kicker was her bridal party going up for seconds before all of the guests had been served.  I was seated at one of the last tables to go up to the buffet and by the time we got there, it was pitiful.  All of the proteins were gone and what remained was some random sides and sauces.  Everyone else before us loaded up their plates assuming the buffet would be replenished, but that was only happening if someone paid for more food, and that was not in the bride's budget and her parents refused to chip in anything.  

Wow, they managed to top the couple at the similar wedding I attended. This couple did the same thing with charging for all drinks other than water. One young woman sitting at my table ordered a soda and, not realizing that everything required cash, didn't have the money to pay for it. So her soda sat on the edge of the bar all night gathering moisture because she couldn't come up with the $$ to free it. (None of the rest of us were carrying appropriate cash either.) She was humiliated.

This reception took place in a tent. It was pouring rain, so we couldn't hear each other speak very well over the thundering of rain-on-canvas. But we were all afraid that the bride was devastated by the rain and was off somewhere having a breakdown, as she and the rest of the wedding party disappeared immediately after the ceremony and did not return for over an hour. Nope-- it's just that there was a non-tent location for the wedding party to socialize amongst themselves. Presumably they could hear each other without shouting and had drinks available.

Finally, the wedding party returned and we were served tiny plates of food. The bride wanted to take home as much cake as possible, so she instructed the servers to make the slices served to guests as minuscule as possible and not to serve seconds.

A few hours later, a group of us were leaving-- you can bet we were ordering pizza on our way out the door-- and the bride ran over and expressed dismay that we were going before the games. I'M TOO HUNGRY TO PLAY ANY MORE GAMES!

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Reminds me of the wedding I attended where the bride and groom ate steak whilst the rest of us ate chicken, lol. The two elderly aunts sitting near me then proceeded to put all the silverware, plates, glasses and condiments in their purses. Most memorable wedding for us.

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As I posted above, I seem to have achieved a state of blissful detachment when it comes to weddings. If only I could maintain that state all the time. Like this morning. I had to stop myself from sending a "F8ck you" email. Sigh.

It's like this. The other day I bought an inexpensive Kindle book on a subject of interest. It featured an internal link to a free download of a workbook, so I went to that link. I had to enter my email address to get the download. Okay. Then, this morning, I got an email from the author, subject line "How Can I Help?" It started off with "Dear [my first name] - I'm SO thrilled to have you here as a part of [name deleted] Movement! I'm [author's first name], and I help women trade overwhelm and fatigue for focus and peace. (You can learn more about my journey to peace, right here!)." And there was more. 

I replied, as civilly as I could before my morning coffee: "Look, I bought your ebook and downloaded the material. I didn't join any movement. I'm unsubscribing. K, thx, bye."

It has occurred to me, that I have to give that author credit for running a serious active marketing plan for her books, which is quite a contrast to the unfocused flailings of a certain pair of LA-based Breakout Stars™ who have a new book out. Heh. 

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10 hours ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I went to a wedding where the only "free" drinks were water or punch.  Sodas were part of the cash bar.  This wedding still ranks as the worst wedding I have ever been to.  The bride was 19 and had a set budget.  The buffet was skimpy to begin with, but the real kicker was her bridal party going up for seconds before all of the guests had been served.  I was seated at one of the last tables to go up to the buffet and by the time we got there, it was pitiful.  All of the proteins were gone and what remained was some random sides and sauces.  Everyone else before us loaded up their plates assuming the buffet would be replenished, but that was only happening if someone paid for more food, and that was not in the bride's budget and her parents refused to chip in anything.  

Sounds like my brother and sister-in-law's wedding. I went to get a Coke and was told it was $1. I said, it's a Coke -- not understanding they were charging me for a lukewarm can of pop. I've never been to a wedding where I was charged for an NA drink. They also ran out of (lukewarm, nasty) food even before the relatives had been fed. 

My lying SIL "forgot" to invite the out-of-state sister (me), and when called on it, wrote, "I sent you an invitation but it came back." Uh huh, and I'm the queen of England, you lying liar who lies. 

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We went grocery shopping tonight for the first time without having to wear a mask. I got completely teary eyed. I never thought the day would come. I am forever thankful for the scientists who worked so hard for the vaccines. I know every one has different thoughts on vaccines and that's ok. I'm not hear to debate it. I'm just happy. I also know many are not ready to ditch the mask and that's ok too. I'm just overcome with emotions right now...😊

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We had a dry wedding because my husband was a recovering alcoholic (still my husband, no longer recovering, back on the bottle full stop) and the venue kept a bar open and staffed anyways so there ended up being a “cash bar”.  But, mine was also strictly child free, including no child attendants, so cash bar or not I’ve been told people really loved that more than anything 🤣
 The “child” struck a nerve with a lot of our family members trying to say their 10y/o’s were mature so I set an 18+ age limit, let them whine and had a wonderful time with no Children.

Edited by NotthebadVictoria
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4 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Somebody went to the groomer today!

CB542670-554F-4503-A739-238D439B3A77.jpeg

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What a good looking boy!  He looks pleased with himself (deservedly). 😀

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I'm glad we eloped too. I was never one to daydream about my wedding either. I grew up with girls who did. Obsessively looking through wedding magazines (yes, magazines. I'm old) and picking their favorite dress. I've never been a dressy girly girl. I hate dresses. 

The weddings I've been to have all been fine, save one. My older stepdaughters. Enough bullshit there to fertilize 40 acres.. 

@Scarlett45 what a handsome pupper you've got there. ❤️

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my first wedding was in a backyard with a few guests. i wore an off the rack dress. our 'reception' was agin in the backyard a week later, waring a homemade dress. 

17 years later i remarried. this time my children and his chose my dress, a real wedding dress and veil. we married and had our reception and dinner in the same room at a golf course. i had only my MOH and he his BM. our children had a part in the wedding. guests sat at their reception table seats.

and one funny part ----  as i had no wedding planner, nobody came to get me when it was time to walk down the 'aisle'. i guess people were wondering if i had reneged! 😆

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6 hours ago, Crochetlady said:

(yes, magazines. I'm old)

I love the magazines - I saved my oldest sister's magazines from the very early '90s and they are a HOOT.

There was an article about 365 ways to say I Love You and one of them was to decorate his parking space at work. I'm pretty sure that's a great way to get de-fiancéed and fast 😆

D25A5AB8-8E5B-43A6-8ACE-277BD51ACD30.jpeg

Edited by RedDelicious
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35 minutes ago, RedDelicious said:

I'll be right back, I have to plug in the fax.

Will you still be reachable by pager though? 

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21 minutes ago, Tikichick said:

Will you still be reachable by pager though? 

18 😆

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1 hour ago, RedDelicious said:

I love the magazines - I saved my oldest sister's magazines from the very early '90s and they are a HOOT.

There was an article about 365 ways to say I Love You and one of them was to decorate his parking space at work. I'm pretty sure that's a great way to get de-fiancéed and fast 😆

D25A5AB8-8E5B-43A6-8ACE-277BD51ACD30.jpeg

Can you imagine a men’s magazine ever running something like that? Also, the 1950s called (on a land line) and would like their gender roles back.

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2 minutes ago, MargeGunderson said:

Can you imagine a men’s magazine ever running something like that? Also, the 1950s called (on a land line) and would like their gender roles back.

When we cleaned out my dad's dresser after he passed, we found a book about how to please a woman.  My parents were married back in the 70s, and this book was definitely published then per the illustrations.

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1 hour ago, RedDelicious said:

I love the magazines - I saved my oldest sister's magazines from the very early '90s and they are a HOOT.

There was an article about 365 ways to say I Love You and one of them was to decorate his parking space at work. I'm pretty sure that's a great way to get de-fiancéed and fast 😆

D25A5AB8-8E5B-43A6-8ACE-277BD51ACD30.jpeg

OMG Jill Duggar read that magazine for sure 🤣

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In the Wedding Thread we were discussing trends, and when I was getting my nails done yesterday I was chatting with my nail tech (I always have the same one) about nail trends. 

 

So lets take it back 2002-2004, WHO ELSE was obsessed with air brush French acrylic nails with a heart on the ring finger? I swear every teen girl I knew during that time was obsessed. We all had it, and I always spent my allowance on my fill in. Like this.

Thinking about it takes me back!

I was chatting with my co-worker who is a few years older than me (so same general trends) and she said she didnt do the heart, but she remembers her devotion to airbrush french. We were joking that we are not youngins any more.

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1 hour ago, RedDelicious said:

There was an article about 365 ways to say I Love You and one of them was to decorate his parking space at work. I'm pretty sure that's a great way to get de-fiancéed and fast 😆

 

Oh yeah the hell with that shit.  Mine is getting texted shortly and will be told to dream up his own dinner tonight, I'm too damn tired.  And I got just the romantic note to leave him this weeked - Paint the freaking front door already!  In BOLD SHARPIE.  Nothing says love like a man finishing his projects so his wife doesn't have live around them.

We got spliced at the town hall - nobody but us, his cousin and wife, and the judge.  Really it was a bargain for $25.00.  Mom always said it costs more to undo it than to do it!

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1 hour ago, RedDelicious said:

I love the magazines - I saved my oldest sister's magazines from the very early '90s and they are a HOOT.

There was an article about 365 ways to say I Love You and one of them was to decorate his parking space at work. I'm pretty sure that's a great way to get de-fiancéed and fast 😆

D25A5AB8-8E5B-43A6-8ACE-277BD51ACD30.jpeg

Yikes!  365 Ways to be a Stalker!  I think most men would chew off a leg to escape that much "love".  

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3 minutes ago, MargeGunderson said:

Can you imagine a men’s magazine ever running something like that? Also, the 1950s called (on a land line) and would like their gender roles back.

It's literally SO BAD. Here are some more:

4. Have a bouquet of his favorite flowers delivered to his office.

19. Let him steal the covers every now and then.

22. Hire a musician to serenade him.

50. Fill his car with helium balloons and a great big card that says you care.

60. Send mail to him when he's away on business. Be sure to include a picture of you!

110. Write I love you in soap on the bathroom mirror before he goes in to shave.

145. Keep the checkbook balanced.

146. Let him drive your car with the new CD player for a week.

163. If he has trouble with organizing important papers, buy him colorful folders that he'll enjoy using.

164. If he runs late in the morning, set his alarm clock for a half hour earlier and greet him with fresh squeezed orange juice.

205. Record a romantic message and sneak it into his cassette player.

235. Leave fun messages that flash up on his home computer.

237. Drop by his office when you know he's out to lunch and leave a provocative note that will make him want to rush home later.

267. When he returns from a business trip, get the welcome home banners out and have a private celebration.

290. Every now and then, put your cares and worries aside and enjoy an evening back in time: treat him to a 50s night. Be Donna Reed and pamper him by making dinner, bringing him his slippers, etc. Or meet him at the door after a fight, dressed in 60s garb and holding a sign with a peace symbol and these words: Make Love Not War.

THIS WAS MARCH 1993 PEOPLE.

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2 minutes ago, RedDelicious said:

It's literally SO BAD. Here are some more:

4. Have a bouquet of his favorite flowers delivered to his office.

19. Let him steal the covers every now and then.

22. Hire a musician to serenade him.

50. Fill his car with helium balloons and a great big card that says you care.

60. Send mail to him when he's away on business. Be sure to include a picture of you!

110. Write I love you in soap on the bathroom mirror before he goes in to shave.

145. Keep the checkbook balanced.

146. Let him drive your car with the new CD player for a week.

163. If he has trouble with organizing important papers, buy him colorful folders that he'll enjoy using.

164. If he runs late in the morning, set his alarm clock for a half hour earlier and greet him with fresh squeezed orange juice.

205. Record a romantic message and sneak it into his cassette player.

235. Leave fun messages that flash up on his home computer.

237. Drop by his office when you know he's out to lunch and leave a provocative note that will make him want to rush home later.

267. When he returns from a business trip, get the welcome home banners out and have a private celebration.

290. Every now and then, put your cares and worries aside and enjoy an evening back in time: treat him to a 50s night. Be Donna Reed and pamper him by making dinner, bringing him his slippers, etc. Or meet him at the door after a fight, dressed in 60s garb and holding a sign with a peace symbol and these words: Make Love Not War.

THIS WAS MARCH 1993 PEOPLE.

OFFS! Seriously? I got nothing... 🙄 If I did any one of those things, Husband would have me committed for sure.

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13 minutes ago, Westiepeach said:

OFFS! Seriously? I got nothing... 🙄 If I did any one of those things, Husband would have me committed for sure.

My husband would assume I had been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a pod person.

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Just now, MargeGunderson said:

My husband would assume I had been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a pod person.

Aw but pod people are super cute!!

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Just now, RedDelicious said:

Aw but pod people are super cute!!

If she brings him muffins at the office, he’s gonna keep her!

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29 minutes ago, RedDelicious said:

It's literally SO BAD. Here are some more:

4. Have a bouquet of his favorite flowers delivered to his office.

19. Let him steal the covers every now and then.

22. Hire a musician to serenade him.

50. Fill his car with helium balloons and a great big card that says you care.

60. Send mail to him when he's away on business. Be sure to include a picture of you!

110. Write I love you in soap on the bathroom mirror before he goes in to shave.

145. Keep the checkbook balanced.

146. Let him drive your car with the new CD player for a week.

163. If he has trouble with organizing important papers, buy him colorful folders that he'll enjoy using.

164. If he runs late in the morning, set his alarm clock for a half hour earlier and greet him with fresh squeezed orange juice.

205. Record a romantic message and sneak it into his cassette player.

235. Leave fun messages that flash up on his home computer.

237. Drop by his office when you know he's out to lunch and leave a provocative note that will make him want to rush home later.

267. When he returns from a business trip, get the welcome home banners out and have a private celebration.

290. Every now and then, put your cares and worries aside and enjoy an evening back in time: treat him to a 50s night. Be Donna Reed and pamper him by making dinner, bringing him his slippers, etc. Or meet him at the door after a fight, dressed in 60s garb and holding a sign with a peace symbol and these words: Make Love Not War.

THIS WAS MARCH 1993 PEOPLE.

OMG!  That would have been too much for 1953!

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On 5/18/2021 at 9:50 AM, RedDelicious said:

That IS risky behavior! It's not even Memorial Day!! Same for us here. 😆

Here in Saskatchewan, Canada, we have had 2 days of +32*C, and in 2 more days it will be down to -6*C and snow! From air conditioner to furnace in the same week!

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3 hours ago, RedDelicious said:

I love the magazines - I saved my oldest sister's magazines from the very early '90s and they are a HOOT.

There was an article about 365 ways to say I Love You and one of them was to decorate his parking space at work. I'm pretty sure that's a great way to get de-fiancéed and fast 😆

D25A5AB8-8E5B-43A6-8ACE-277BD51ACD30.jpeg

I have old magazines for women from the 1920's to the 1970's, it sure interesting to read the articles and I love the old ads they had back then.

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The Duggar’s love welcome home banners! Coincidence?! Lol OMG these are written for a stalker !

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2 hours ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

When we cleaned out my dad's dresser after he passed, we found a book about how to please a woman.  My parents were married back in the 70s, and this book was definitely published then per the illustrations.

In the mid-70s, I babysat for an extremely religious couple who had a book like that hidden behind other books on their shelves in the living room. 12-year-old me got quite an education that night. The next time I babysat the book was gone.

Edited by Nysha
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2 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

In the Wedding Thread we were discussing trends, and when I was getting my nails done yesterday I was chatting with my nail tech (I always have the same one) about nail trends. 

 

So lets take it back 2002-2004, WHO ELSE was obsessed with air brush French acrylic nails with a heart on the ring finger? I swear every teen girl I knew during that time was obsessed. We all had it, and I always spent my allowance on my fill in. Like this.

Thinking about it takes me back!

I was chatting with my co-worker who is a few years older than me (so same general trends) and she said she didnt do the heart, but she remembers her devotion to airbrush french. We were joking that we are not youngins any more.

image.thumb.png.b9036acf8b41051d87fc51da27398ea6.png

image.thumb.png.7daa9896b20505b6e5864f423fa12fce.png

I’m Gen X and manicures weren’t a regular “thing”’for my generation. I’ve only had a few in my lifetime. My mom always did her own. When I do get them, I quickly ruin them with simple daily tasks 😀.

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The car with the new CD player is very important.

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2 hours ago, deaja said:

The car with the new CD player is very important.

One year my husband made me choose between having an air conditioner or cassette player in a new car we were ordering. I was 22, I picked the cassette player!  

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Omg, fill his car with helium balloons!  😂 definitely sounds like a Jill thing!  

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1 hour ago, awaken said:

Omg, fill his car with helium balloons!  😂 definitely sounds like a Jill thing!  

and a great big card that says you're crazy 😝 

Seriously. If anyone did that to me, I’d be pissed. You’d have to pop all the balloons just to get out of the parking lot. I would also be annoyed by having to clean soap off the bathroom mirror. 

I was 18 in 1993 and a freshman in college. I guess I didn’t realize that it was still common for women to stop working after the wedding, because that is mostly how the article was worded. I thought that went out in the 80s.

Thank god the rest of the magazine is full of outrageous 90s fashion! Lort.

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On 5/19/2021 at 6:13 PM, Scarlett45 said:

Somebody went to the groomer today!

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Ah, so cute!

15 hours ago, RedDelicious said:

I love the magazines - I saved my oldest sister's magazines from the very early '90s and they are a HOOT.

There was an article about 365 ways to say I Love You and one of them was to decorate his parking space at work. I'm pretty sure that's a great way to get de-fiancéed and fast 😆

D25A5AB8-8E5B-43A6-8ACE-277BD51ACD30.jpeg

Who would want that?

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9 hours ago, mittsigirl said:

One year my husband made me choose between having an air conditioner or cassette player in a new car we were ordering. I was 22, I picked the cassette player!  

I remember thinking my mom’s car was so fancy when she got one that had power windows instead of crank windows.

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I wore glasses similar to Claire's in the late 1980s, when I was 11 years old. 

Quoting @madpsych78 from the Justin & Claire thread.

 

You know how they say people tend to hold onto the style and fashion from the time in their life when they were the happiest? My Mom holds onto the 80s like it was NO TOMORROW. She does modernize it, but those 80s styles are so "her", the prints, the shoulder pads, the masculine suit jackets for women, and lets not FORGET the oversized glasses which she is so glad are back in style, with the bold colors, along with aviator sunglasses.

It's cute. I cannot tell what style I will hold onto yet.

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2 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Quoting @madpsych78 from the Justin & Claire thread.

 

You know how they say people tend to hold onto the style and fashion from the time in their life when they were the happiest? My Mom holds onto the 80s like it was NO TOMORROW. She does modernize it, but those 80s styles are so "her", the prints, the shoulder pads, the masculine suit jackets for women, and lets not FORGET the oversized glasses which she is so glad are back in style, with the bold colors, along with aviator sunglasses.

It's cute. I cannot tell what style I will hold onto yet.

I worry that I will be that person, but not in a cute way. Skinny pants are out in favor of wide legs, which make me look like a fire hydrant (and I’m 5’7). Also, apparently the hair side part is so last year. I look terrible with a center part, because I have a giant head and the size is accentuated by a center part. I did spend the pandemic growing out my eyebrows (the 90s were not kind to them), so at least I’m current with that trend.

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1 minute ago, MargeGunderson said:

I worry that I will be that person, but not in a cute way. Skinny pants are out in favor of wide legs, which make me look like a fire hydrant (and I’m 5’7). Also, apparently the hair side part is so last year. I look terrible with a center part, because I have a giant head and the size is accentuated by a center part. I did spend the pandemic growing out my eyebrows (the 90s were not kind to them), so at least I’m current with that trend.

I am sure you are lovely.

 I like to be trendy sometimes, but I have the same body shape I always have had, and some styles and eras are more accommodating to that. I LOVE the modern vintage look with the full skirt and nipped waist being a walking fertility statue, and PETTICOATS. OMG I do love a petticoat under my vintage sundresses, you swish, and it hides all the business. 

I got an ad for DSW in my email box, and I thought "the 90s are back" I remember these styles from when I was a little girl! Specifically the chunky block heel sandals Cher wore in Clueless.

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18 hours ago, mittsigirl said:

Here in Saskatchewan, Canada, we have had 2 days of +32*C, and in 2 more days it will be down to -6*C and snow! From air conditioner to furnace in the same week!

Here in Colorado we have the same weather but it is in the same day.  If you don't like the weather wait 15 minutes and then it will change. 

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Scarlett45

This is a reminder that the Politics Policy is still in effect.

I understand with recent current events there may be a desire to discuss political social media posts of those in the Duggar realm- this is not the place for those discussions. If you believe someone has violated forum rules, report them, do not respond or engage.

Political discussion is not allowed in this forum- this includes Small Talk topics. Please stay in the spirit of the policy- I have noticed a tendency for some to follow the letter but not the spirit.

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