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Small Talk: The Prayer Closet


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I am so sorry, @Scarlett45. When I saw this thread light up, this is what I was afraid of. I don't have anything much to add to what others have said but I do want to echo that it sounds like you, your mom, and your godmother were lucky to have each other. I'm glad you and Cosmo can take care of each other now. Take good care. My most sincere condolences.

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8 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

I have been more understanding of her husband’s “issues” than most. Had he just let her go to the hotel in peace I would be willing to play nice, but when he started “performing” at the hotel, the hospital, SCREAMING at my Mom, saying that it was a “conspiracy” to keep his wife away- she LEFT. She used the last bit of her strength to LEAVE. Without her PHONE. She didn’t even pack a BAG! And then he threatened not to pay the bills until she came back! She was in the hospital. Can you believe?

Somewhere in his head he did a good job of caring for her, but his best wasn’t good enough. And rather than leave her care to others more physically and mentally capable he made it all about him. How low. I don’t envy the mess he will be when his own kids finally have to deal with him. 
 

My godmother has birthday presents she never even got to use. Her son law’s parents gave her a hat she was fond of but she never got to use it. That makes me SO SAD. I have those things, I will ship them to her daughter if she wants them. 

Yes my godmother had three daughters- we are closest with the youngest who’s kind of checked out; I think this is all too much for her. 

My deepest condolences to her children. It would be really nice if you sent them a card/email expressing how much their mom was loved.  They would like that.
 

Biggest hugs to all who loved your godmother. May she Rest In Peace. 
 

She seems like she was deeply loved and was a wonderful person.

Edited by iwantcookies
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3 minutes ago, iwantcookies said:

My deepest condolences to her children. It would be really nice if you sent them a card/email expressing how much their mom was loved.  They would like that.
 

Biggest hugs to all who loved your godmother. May she Rest In Peace. 
 

She seems like she was deeply loved and was a wonderful person.

Thank you. Of course I will do that. 

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My friend's surgery went well. She was a little tired, but today she told she seems fine. Thank you for the kind wishes.

@Scarlett45 I'm so sorry for your loss. My condolences to you, your mother and Cosmo. Give Cosmo a pet for me. (I have no dogs, but I really want one.) May her memory be a blessing and may she rest in power. 

@QuinnInND I fourth other people's recommendation to get a burner phone. I would assume anything you tell her will be passed to your mother, including your phone number. I agree it's best to start off with that you don't blame her, but you don't forgive mom either. Make sure she understands your boundaries.  The best advice I can give you is really think over all the possibilities before moving forward. 

We care about you Quinn, and we'll be here no matter what happens. 

 

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2 hours ago, Temperance said:

 

@Scarlett45

@QuinnInND I fourth other people's recommendation to get a burner phone. I would assume anything you tell her will be passed to your mother, including your phone number. I agree it's best to start off with that you don't blame her, but you don't forgive mom either. Make sure she understands your boundaries.  The best advice I can give you is really think over all the possibilities before moving forward. 

We care about you Quinn, and we'll be here no matter what happens. 

 

Thank you. I'm still thinking about whether or not to contact her. Thinking about all the possibilities is one of my strong suits. It was a survival thing for me for years. I bought a burner phone today, so I've got that. 

Edited by QuinnInND
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39 minutes ago, QuinnInND said:

Thank you. I'm still thinking about whether or not to contact her or not. Thinking about all the possibilities is one of my strong suits. It was a survival thing for me for years. I bought a burner phone today, so I've got that. 

@QuinnInND you don’t have to decide today! Take all the time you need. Maybe create a dummy email address you don’t use to write to her if that’s easier. 

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51 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

@QuinnInND you don’t have to decide today! Take all the time you need. Maybe create a dummy email address you don’t use to write to her if that’s easier. 

That's what my husband said. Maybe try writing. And making a dummy email. I'm not deciding one way or the other today. I go between "yes I want to" and "yeah, no I don't" all the time. I've got too many doubts and too much to go over in my mind first. I may wait til school is over. Not sure. I'd rather wait and think it over than go for it and get fucked. 

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13 hours ago, beckie said:

It doesn't seem to matter how active I am, when mine hit I'm incapacitated.  One of the last ones I had happened at my very active job. And the last one started while I was asleep and woke up in a full blown attack.  Luckily they don't happen often.

I completely understand. I also have awakened with the horrifying vertigo. I really suggest doing the exercises several times a month or more when you are NOT suffering from incapacitating vertigo. That has really helped me and I have had way, way fewer episodes since I do that. Good luck, I really hope it will stay away. It is the worse!

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26 minutes ago, Love2dance said:

I completely understand. I also have awakened with the horrifying vertigo. I really suggest doing the exercises several times a month or more when you are NOT suffering from incapacitating vertigo. That has really helped me and I have had way, way fewer episodes since I do that. Good luck, I really hope it will stay away. It is the worse!

Its worth trying.  Nothing else has worked so far.

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8 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

Do try the allergy pill and flonase for some vertigo relief!  I take an allergy pill every day and use the flonase when sneezing and any sign of dizziness occurs.

They don't work for me. My dr gave me antivert and that works somewhat.  

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@Scarlett45 I’m sending you and your Mother condolences and the kitties send purrs to Cosmo. You did well by her and her heart was light leaving this earth knowing that Cosmo would be well cared for by you. I’m glad you realize that the Dad is his daughter’s problem and not yours. He sounds like her could be a nightmare that you don’t need in your life. Fingers crossed that you can get to St Kitts on her next birthday to celebrate a life well lived. Be aware of small signs. I’m sure that she will be sending you some of thanks and love. 
   Please try to get some rest and grieve. *hugs* 

@QuinnInND I’m so glad you purchased a burner phone. I think I’d start small. Testing in a way to see what does or doesn’t get back to your Mother. I’m leery of a handwritten note, as she might share its contents with someone, but at least they would be your words and not how someone interprets what you say. I think it’s nice to mention the teddy bear, as it should be a safe topic. I’d recommend baby steps as far as information shared. Remember too that you are under no obligation to them. Do only what you want, when you choose to. Best wishes. 

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On 3/13/2021 at 8:38 AM, beckie said:

It doesn't seem to matter how active I am, when mine hit I'm incapacitated.  One of the last ones I had happened at my very active job. And the last one started while I was asleep and woke up in a full blown attack.  Luckily they don't happen often.

@beckie, Unfortunately I have had years of experience with vertigo. The first episode happened when I woke up in a full blown episode. I was terrified and thought I might have something like MS. I went to the doctor and she gave me antivert and promised she'd get me through this. The antivert upset my stomach and the vertigo went on for almost 2 years.

I got used to it. It was smaller symptoms mostly. I would get a wave of nausea when I bent down or reached up, things I did all day long at work. I learned to always be holding on to something when I did those kinds of movements. Once I asked my husband to look at my eyes while I was having an episode. He said that they looked like a cartoon character's eyes - kind of spinning! 

My doctor never recommended the exercises that others have linked here. I wish she had! Anyway, the episodes lessened over time and now, many years later, I can say that I haven't had one for a very long time. I do lie on my foam roller nearly every day. Putting my head flat back like that would have affected me in the past, but I think that because I do it frequently, that doesn't happen anymore. I do sometimes get ocular migraines, which in my case, do not include a headache. Those last about 20 minutes. I haven't had one of those for some time either. Closing the blinds when the sun is too bright has helped to prevent them for me. 

Anyway, I do think these exercises would be beneficial if done when you are not in a vertigo episode. I wish you the very best of luck in dealing with this. 

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1 hour ago, Mindthinkr said:

@Scarlett45 I’m sending you and your Mother condolences and the kitties send purrs to Cosmo. You did well by her and her heart was 

@QuinnInND I’m so glad you purchased a burner phone. I think I’d start small. Testing in a way to see what does or doesn’t get back to your Mother. I’m leery of a handwritten note, as she might share its contents with someone, but at least they would be your words and not how someone interprets what you say. I think it’s nice to mention the teddy bear, as it should be a safe topic. I’d recommend baby steps as far as information shared. Remember too that you are under no obligation to them. Do only what you want, when you choose to. Best wishes. 

I don't know how I would know what if anything got back to my mother, short of my sister telling me. I fully intend to be careful with what I share with my sister if and when the time comes. 

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Good news Sunday. I have an appointment for the first Moderna vaccine the 16th. The only thing I am mildly concerned about is the email said to be sure and bring your paperwork but did not say what that paperwork would be. I will get there early so that hopefully can be resolved. There is no phone number to call and get more info. I am happy to get the shot with Tx not requiring masks but to be honest I have only had one customer who did not were one. We are told not to " police " our customers. We will continue to do what we have been doing, if ask about the mask we will say," we do not require them but I would appreciate you wearing one if you have one". I have told my employees if they are concerned to upgrade their mask. I have one lady who says she is concerned ( for good reason) but still just wears a cloth mask. She indicated that she would continue to wear the cloth mask but still complains. I get she is worried but she needs to take responsibility and protect herself. 

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11 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Good news Sunday. I have an appointment for the first Moderna vaccine the 16th. The only thing I am mildly concerned about is the email said to be sure and bring your paperwork but did not say what that paperwork would be. I will get there early so that hopefully can be resolved. There is no phone number to call and get more info. I am happy to get the shot with Tx not requiring masks but to be honest I have only had one customer who did not were one. We are told not to " police " our customers. We will continue to do what we have been doing, if ask about the mask we will say," we do not require them but I would appreciate you wearing one if you have one". I have told my employees if they are concerned to upgrade their mask. I have one lady who says she is concerned ( for good reason) but still just wears a cloth mask. She indicated that she would continue to wear the cloth mask but still complains. I get she is worried but she needs to take responsibility and protect herself. 

I know each state is different, but I wonder if the paperwork is a reference to insurance cards? On Friday when I got mine, we were told if we had an insurance card with us to let them enter it into the system. I was in a group of 5, and some of us had it and some of us didn't. None of us were charged for the vaccine or refused the vaccine for not presenting an insurance card, but they did temporarily take the cards for those of us who had them. The only other paperwork was provided for us. 

Edited by Zella
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@crazycatlady58:  So glad you were able to get a vaccine appointment!!!!!
 

Your paperwork would probably include any insurance cards, and identification (drivers license, passport, etc).  In my case, since I got my vaccine through Walgreens, I brought copies of the email that had the appointment confirmation number on it.  I would think that if you had something like that, you should bring it.  

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16 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Good news Sunday. I have an appointment for the first Moderna vaccine the 16th. The only thing I am mildly concerned about is the email said to be sure and bring your paperwork but did not say what that paperwork would be. I will get there early so that hopefully can be resolved. There is no phone number to call and get more info. I am happy to get the shot with Tx not requiring masks but to be honest I have only had one customer who did not were one. We are told not to " police " our customers. We will continue to do what we have been doing, if ask about the mask we will say," we do not require them but I would appreciate you wearing one if you have one". I have told my employees if they are concerned to upgrade their mask. I have one lady who says she is concerned ( for good reason) but still just wears a cloth mask. She indicated that she would continue to wear the cloth mask but still complains. I get she is worried but she needs to take responsibility and protect herself. 

I got the vaccine through a hospital where I am a patient and they had me bring my driver's license, insurance card, and medical forms they had provided when I registered (HIPPAA forms, etc). If you are getting the shot at one of the state or county clinics, I think you just need your license, insurance card, and a copy of your registration appointment confirmation. 

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8 minutes ago, emma675 said:

I got the vaccine through a hospital where I am a patient and they had me bring my driver's license, insurance card, and medical forms they had provided when I registered (HIPPAA forms, etc). If you are getting the shot at one of the state or county clinics, I think you just need your license, insurance card, and a copy of your registration appointment confirmation. 

It's at one of the vaccination hubs. They gave me a ticket # which I have on my phone. I filled out some paperwork and after I did that it said I could print it out or save as a PDF. I don't have the ability to print anything and could not figure out how to save as a PDF. I am sure if that's the paperwork I need we can figure something out. I am sure I am not the only person with this issue. I plan 9n getting there early so we can fix the problem. I am happy you got your vaccine. 

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11 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

It's at one of the vaccination hubs. They gave me a ticket # which I have on my phone. I filled out some paperwork and after I did that it said I could print it out or save as a PDF. I don't have the ability to print anything and could not figure out how to save as a PDF. I am sure if that's the paperwork I need we can figure something out. I am sure I am not the only person with this issue. I plan 9n getting there early so we can fix the problem. I am happy you got your vaccine. 

Libraries often do a lot of printing for people. Even if they're only curbside and not open, they still might be able to print the paperwork for you before your appointment. We still did printing for folks when our doors were closed. 

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17 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

It's at one of the vaccination hubs. They gave me a ticket # which I have on my phone. I filled out some paperwork and after I did that it said I could print it out or save as a PDF. I don't have the ability to print anything and could not figure out how to save as a PDF. I am sure if that's the paperwork I need we can figure something out. I am sure I am not the only person with this issue. I plan 9n getting there early so we can fix the problem. I am happy you got your vaccine. 

I'm sure you won't be the first with this issue. It's annoying they don't have a phone line you can call, in Dallas the vaccine hubs have been good about organizing the shot drive thus but awful about communication. The smaller counties have been much more organized. But I'm glad you're finally able to get a vaccine!

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48 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Good news Sunday. I have an appointment for the first Moderna vaccine the 16th. The only thing I am mildly concerned about is the email said to be sure and bring your paperwork but did not say what that paperwork would be. I will get there early so that hopefully can be resolved. There is no phone number to call and get more info. I am happy to get the shot with Tx not requiring masks but to be honest I have only had one customer who did not were one. We are told not to " police " our customers. We will continue to do what we have been doing, if ask about the mask we will say," we do not require them but I would appreciate you wearing one if you have one". I have told my employees if they are concerned to upgrade their mask. I have one lady who says she is concerned ( for good reason) but still just wears a cloth mask. She indicated that she would continue to wear the cloth mask but still complains. I get she is worried but she needs to take responsibility and protect herself. 

I had to bring my driver’s license, my insurance card and I had the confirmation number as a text message on my phone, which I showed the pharmacist. After the first shot, they gave me a little folder and it had another form I had to fill out to bring to my 2nd appointment. Same questions they asked when you signed up, and your PCP name, phone and address. Driver’s license number (which they already have) and insurance numbers (again, they have). This is in Ohio, so I imagine all states are somewhat similar. No big deal!

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@Scarlett45 so sorry for your loss. I know Cosmo will have a good life with you, and your godmother knew that as well. Only a star was good enough for her beloved baby.

Good News Sunday: I start my second week at my new job tomorrow. I left Nashville last weekend with the dog, furniture arrives tomorrow, and then Mr Turquoise mid-week. We have a contract on a house a short distance from my office. We won’t get to close until mid-April, so my parents have generously allowed us to stay with them so we didn’t have to do a short-term rental. It’s a commute for me, but rural miles are not city miles, and we (me and Mr) do our coordinations via phone while I’m driving. Yay Bluetooth! Pieces are all falling into place.

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Afternoon everybody!  I must say my state has been handling the vaccine quite well. 
One of my daughters, a middle school teacher, is now eligible and will get her shot on 3/17.  Such a relief because she’s surrounded by people daily. 
All teachers are now eligible!  
Maybe this nightmare is coming to an end!

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1 hour ago, Zella said:

Libraries often do a lot of printing for people. Even if they're only curbside and not open, they still might be able to print the paperwork for you before your appointment. We still did printing for folks when our doors were closed. 

There does not seem to be a way to forward the paperwork. I tried to forward the email to my work computer but the files did not transfer. Thank you for the idea. Like I say I am sure its something they can figure out just annoying there is no way to talk with someone. 

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17 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

There does not seem to be a way to forward the paperwork. I tried to forward the email to my work computer but the files did not transfer. Thank you for the idea. Like I say I am sure its something they can figure out just annoying there is no way to talk with someone. 

Damn that would be frustrating! 

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As far as I have heard every state and every vax site within the states have different protocols. Some require proof that you meet a certain criteria if your state is still doing different phases, like medical forms or teaching ID. Some require attestations, some require insurance info and some require an ID only.

From what I understand though, is if you show up with an ID and proof of appointment, you're unlikely to be turned away. Like you said @crazycatlady58, it'll all work out.

My good news is by proxy. My friend had implants that needed to be removed. It was a two step process. She's a few days post op and she is tickled pink over her implantless, but jacked up boobies. She makes me laugh and smile because she can't stop talking about them. 

Good luck @rue721. You'll own that interview.

Edited by GeeGolly
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It has been a very crazy few weeks in our neck of the woods.  The good-my mom got both doses of the vaccine (Moderna), and while she did have side effects from the second, they were not long-lasting, and she's back to feeling great again.  All of our family members who tested positive have all recovered as well.  The bad-I've mentioned before a woman I graduated high school with was dealing with her oldest son's cancer diagnosis.  They were informed a few weeks that the cancer had spread, and he's now under hospice care.  He's only 21 with a young son.  My heart just breaks for her. 
Before Mr. Six & I got together, I was seeing another guy.  We went to school/band functions together, and at one point, it got semi-serious (and his mother had us married with kids).  I was close with his family and loved spending time with them.  His dad passed away this week.  Obviously, I couldn't attend the services in person, but I did send his mom a sympathy card.  I posted my condolences on his brother's FB page, but I sent him a PM.  I wanted him to know that I cared about his family and how much I enjoyed spending time with his dad.  He was there for me when I lost my dad 10+ years ago, and I felt it was the least I could do.  I've now been with Mr. Six 25 years, but I like to think of my ex as a close friend. I know the pain he's in and how much he's hurting.  It sucks not being able to do much of anything. 
Speaking of the husband, he had a work trip, which took him to North Carolina.  He drove down early one morning, surveyed one building, spent the night, surveyed another building the following day, and then drove home.  He was only gone 30 hours total.  He got his covid test yesterday, which he said he would not recommend to anyone.  He's stuck working from home through the quarantine period, so he can go back next Thursday.  I think it might be a long week.  Send prayers.  And vodka 🤭

@Scarlett45-I am so sorry for the loss of your godmother.  She sounds like an amazing woman and role model, and I know you will take great care of Cosmo.  As long as you have him, you have a piece of her.  Many hugs to you and your mom.

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Would someone please turn off the snow? 2 feet and still coming down hard the bullshit is that work still wants me to go to work on the overnight shift the mayor said no cars allowed on the road 

And the best news school is closed tomorrow. 

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I am reporting in as good news that I didn't cry yet today and the daughter in law was invited to get a vaccine through her work although she is under the age limit, but all in her work were invited through the city and she got the J and J one shot.

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57 minutes ago, Rabbittron said:

Would someone please turn off the snow? 2 feet and still coming down hard the bullshit is that work still wants me to go to work on the overnight shift the mayor said no cars allowed on the road 

And the best news school is closed tomorrow. 

I'm in Denver too, and this is a blizzard, for pete's sake. Winds are blowing, heavy snow falling, If you really have to go, I hope the heck you can get to and from work safely. All travel is discouraged and there are whiteout conditions on highways. From what I can see out my windows and on the local TV news, travel in town isn't whited-out, but if you get out into open spaces it could be dicey I think.

From the airport's website, a current condition statement: A strong winter storm is impacting operations at DEN. The airport is open, however all runways are currently closed. Airlines have ceased operations into or out of DEN for the rest of Sunday, March 14. Additionally,  due to blizzard conditions, travel to DEN by motor vehicle is not advised at this time. Peña Boulevard is currently impassable with multiple disabled vehicles along the roadways. If it is absolutely necessary to travel to the airport, the RTD A-Line is the recommended mode of transportation. The A-line is currently operating with some delays. Check www.rtd-denver.com for the latest updates from RTD.

(For non-Denver folks: The A-line is commuter rail. Peña Boulevard is an 11 mile long divided highway linking the airport to I-70, running through an open space corridor, i.e., like being out in the country with not much to block blowing snow. It's maintained by the airport, which historically uses plenty of deicer and deploys sufficient snow plows to keep it open. When Peña AND the runways are closed, it's a fecking big deal. As in, almost never happens. I should know. I used to work there.)

ETA: Just now a live report on TV, a news crew that had to pull off Pena Blvd because of whiteout conditions, lots of stranded cars going nowhere, some stuck in snow, just no visibility so too dangerous to drive. Sheesh. 

Edited by Jeeves
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1 minute ago, Jeeves said:

I'm in Denver too, and this is a blizzard, for pete's sake. Winds are blowing, heavy snow falling, If you really have to go, I hope the heck you can get to and from work safely. All travel is discouraged and there are whiteout conditions on highways. From what I can see out my windows and on the local TV news, travel in town isn't whited-out, but if you get out into open spaces it could be dicey I think.

From the airport's website, a current condition statement: A strong winter storm is impacting operations at DEN. The airport is open, however all runways are currently closed. Airlines have ceased operations into or out of DEN for the rest of Sunday, March 14. Additionally,  due to blizzard conditions, travel to DEN by motor vehicle is not advised at this time. Peña Boulevard is currently impassable with multiple disabled vehicles along the roadways. If it is absolutely necessary to travel to the airport, the RTD A-Line is the recommended mode of transportation. The A-line is currently operating with some delays. Check www.rtd-denver.com for the latest updates from RTD.

(The A-line is commuter rail. Peña Boulevard is an 11 mile long divided highway linking the airport to I-70, running through an open space corridor, i.e., like being out in the country with not much to block blowing snow. It's maintained by the airport, which historically uses plenty of deicer and deploys sufficient snow plows to keep it open. When Peña AND the runways are closed, it's a fecking big deal. As in, almost never happens. I should know. I used to work there.)

Westminister here. 

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Stay safe, Denver peeps! My SIL in the desert Southwest is getting a huge windstorm with the same system except with blowing dust and sand. Her house is rattling and the sky is brown and the mountains have disappeared. Today is day 2 of this weather. She's so ready to move. 

Edited by QuinnInND
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