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Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

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10 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

Thank you all so much for your kindness and words of wisdom. You’re lovely people, all of you.

While I’m at it, Pentatonix...try “Mary Did You Know” or “Take Me Home.” That they sing like that a cappella is amazing to me.
 

 

Have you seen their " Imagin" vidio?

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22 hours ago, Oldernowiser said:

I don’t really know how to start this...and it’s hard to even type the words, which is probably why I’ve put it off.

My mom died last week. She did NOT have Covid, for which I am forever grateful. She had had a few more falls lately, including the last time I talked to her two days prior. I called and she was able to answer the phone but not get up from the floor to hit the alert wall call button. I called the AL front desk and they got her up and she seemed okay.

Two days later she seemed more confused than usual, so they took her to the ER for a CT scan. My saint of a sister, who lives four hours away, had gotten that call at something horrible like 4 a.m. and when she got to the hospital they wouldn’t let her in the ER due to the forty Covid positive patients waiting in the ER to be admitted. My sister could see the people through the ER windows and she said it was a scene from hell and my sister was a nurse.

The internal medicine doctor called my sister that afternoon to say they were planning to admit Mom overnight, just for observation, if they could find a bed, but that she was doing well, laughing and making friends with everyone there. The CT scan was negative and everything else checked out.

At 3 a.m. my sister was called at her hotel and told that Mom had died. Her heart rate, despite the pacemaker, just kept dropping and she quietly moved on. The hard part, like so many these days, is that she didn’t have family there. I couldn’t even get on a plane to go help, before or after, because it’s a five hour trip and just not worth the risk. I hadn’t seen her since Christmas.

No service. My sister took her ashes and my father’s and spread them to the winds, together, near where they lived for 45 years. 

She was 92. The thing about my mom, though, is that she was always so ALIVE. She was a natural, genuine extrovert and could make six new best friends in a gas station parking lot if you left her alone for three minutes. She was smart, kind, a terrific audience, and and even in her dementia years, still occasionally very funny. She sang all of the time, seemingly out of nowhere and was endlessly positive and cheerful.

(Needless to say, I take after my dad.)

Anyway, I’m still just sort of in shock. This is a woman who successfully battled severe heart disease for 25 years...her heart had been restarted twice. It sounds kind of ridiculous to say her death was “sudden”....but it was. Now it’s nothing but paperwork and more paperwork and every once in a while, I suddenly think, “Oh SHIT I forgot to call Mom today!!!” before I remember.

It could have been so much worse...cancer, being bedridden, her dying alone in the night at the AL place... so there’s that. Our relationship was complicated by the fact that she thought my father could do no wrong and he and I did not get along. At all. So, feelings.

So this is hard. 

My best to all of you who are also going through stuff. 2020 is just one rough, rough year. 

my deepest condolences on your loss. it is such a change when our mothers go ...it was a huge adjustment for me.  be good to yourself and hold those good memories close. 

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 Glad you had some good news, Zoomama, and that you feel somewhat reassured.

Sending a big hug and hope that this is just one of those things where life likes to terrify us for no good reason

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@Oldernowiser, I'm so sorry for your loss. Most of what you wrote would be beautiful in an obituary. I hope you at least saved what you wrote about your mom for yourself somewhere (in addition to here).

I am also feeling like I should have visited more. We visit for Dad's birthday every year, which is in April. Meaning we were scheduled to go two weeks after we went under shelter-in-place orders here. I don't expect I'll be able to see him until the middle of next year at the earliest and even that may be pushing it. He is losing some of his ability to carry on a phone conversation and I don't expect that to improve, either.  My friend's father is 94 years old and in Honolulu. She used to spend a week out of every six there, at minimum, but it's now been months and no telling when she'll be able to see him. Or if she will. It's entirely possible neither of us will get to see our dads again.

2020 can f*^k right off.

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Zoomama, that is good news.  I can image that is a great relief.  I hope they can get you all the info soon.  Maybe, it will be best case scenario.  I hope so. 

For JCBrown and all those who have not been able to visit family, I share your regret. My cousin, who I am responsible for, has been in Memory Care for 6 years. She's not really aware anymore, but, I still liked to visit her and think she knew I was there. I haven't seen her since covid.   I inquired about visiting her through the window at the MC, but, they haven't gotten back with me about the plan.  New director is setting it up.  It's been a long time, since I visited. Her birthday is coming up and even though, she has no idea, I'd like to sing her Happy Birthday.  Maybe somewhere down inside it would register with her.  

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On 8/9/2020 at 1:02 PM, Zella said:

I'm ridiculously happy with how many of my fellow seven slashers are on here. I've never met anyone else in person who does that. 

I do it too.  Seven years of French will do that to you.

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1 minute ago, Ijustwantsomechips said:

I do it too.  Seven years of French will do that to you.

PwNg8oU.gif

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On 8/9/2020 at 11:02 AM, Zella said:

I'm ridiculously happy with how many of my fellow seven slashers are on here. I've never met anyone else in person who does that. 

 

2 minutes ago, Ijustwantsomechips said:

I do it too.  Seven years of French will do that to you.

Me, too. I also slash my zeroes.

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1 minute ago, jcbrown said:

 

Me, too. I also slash my zeroes.

Oh it had never occurred to me to slash those, but it makes sense!

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On 8/9/2020 at 7:07 PM, crazycatlady58 said:

I hope you enjoy them. I personally did not care for the song ( sorry) they they are a fantastic group. Check out them singing Imagine... give you goosebumps.

Pentatonix has the best best version of O Come, All Ye Faithful! That’s my favorite Christmas cd next to the Jackson 5. I don’t like the new lady as much, but she can sing too. 

 

I’m so sorry for your loss @Oldernowiser. You mom sounds like she was a gem.

Edited by Ijustwantsomechips
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It has been a day.

Around 10:45 this morning my phone alerted me that we were in a severe thunderstorm warning, then I saw some messages from friends who live further west saying they were in basements with power off and very frightened due to the wind.  Husband was out for a run (he had dropped his car off for repairs and had decided to run the few miles home), so I called him, buckled the kids into the car, and picked him up quick since it wasn't doing anything at the moment. Not even 10 minutes after we got home, the sky was black, winds were crazy, and sirens were blowing to get to the basement. We could hear thump after thump of branches falling. We were in the basement for around 90 minutes total, thankfully my kids had their Kindles Kindles enough to play games. 

Thankfully we are safe. Our house is more or less fine. Our yard is a disaster. Huge chunks of our wooden privacy fence are gone. A healthy tree completely split in half, crushed my kids swingset (new to us this summer), took out our fire pit and grill, and barely missed the house (damaged the gutters and hit hard enough to knock pictures off the wall inside). Branches everywhere in the back and front yard. We have a few massive branches down in the side yard and one on the roof of our garage. I'm not even sure what we will do to clean them up. Power is out for most of the state. Phone lines are down in my small town so we can't get hold of insurance so aren't sure what to move and what not to. We're taking multiple pictures of everything just in case. I don't even want to think about how much money we will have to spend (insurance will kick in, but doubt they will cover the full cost of replacing everything that needs repaired). There goes what savings we have 😪 And I will probably have to use vacation time for today until we get power and internet back (estimates right now say Wednesday), because even though the majority of my company is affected, they won't care that we can't work. And we have freezers full of food in the basement just waiting to spoil. 

So. Today sucked. 2020 sucks- even the weather is out to get us. I just needed to vent for a minute, and now I have to preserve phone battery for as long as possible. 

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I’m so sorry for everyone that has losses, illness & storm damage. Can it be mid 2021 already with a vaccine available for all?

On a brighter note, happy birthday to everyone who has celebrated recently. We were to go to my granddaughter’s 3rd bday party last Saturday,  but son & DIL had gone camping the weekend prior & one in the group tested positive. Son & DIL didn’t interact with her closely, but they’re not taking chances.

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On 8/9/2020 at 5:46 AM, Westiepeach said:

So, since today is my birthday, I will expect nothing less than a party held at the mall’s food court. Somebody needs to bring the Little Caesar’s Pizza and the Walmart brand 2-liter soft drinks. And someone of course needs to make cupcakes! We have a lot of August birthdays here, so we can have a great big party and celebrate all of us! Masks are NOT allowed, because, well, Jesus. See you all at noon! 🎂🎉🎈🎁🤪

 

Happy Birthday Rainbow GIF by Justin

@Westiepeach !

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On 8/9/2020 at 4:10 PM, Oldernowiser said:

I don’t really know how to start this...and it’s hard to even type the words, which is probably why I’ve put it off.

My mom died last week.

 cats hugging GIF

I'm so sorry.

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45 minutes ago, realityfan26 said:

I’m so sorry for everyone that has losses, illness & storm damage. Can it be mid 2021 already with a vaccine available for all?

On a brighter note, happy birthday to everyone who has celebrated recently. We were to go to my granddaughter’s 3rd bday party last Saturday,  but son & DIL had gone camping the weekend prior & one in the group tested positive. Son & DIL didn’t interact with her closely, but they’re not taking chances.

I am sorry you could not celebrate your granddaughter’s Bday with her. 

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When I don’t get here for a few days and have many notifications I get scared. Usually rightly so. It means something bad has happened to one of y’all and this absence was no exception. @Oldernowiser I’m very sorry about the loss of your Mom. No matter the circumstances it is never easy. @zoomama Glad to hear that some major problems have been eliminated from your diagnosis. @Jenniferbug That’s sounds like my worst nightmare. I’m glad you were able to pick up up your husband and get the whole family to the basement before it hit the fan. 
 I’m having a strong distaste for 2020. So little good news or happy things to share. Is it over yet? My heart is breaking for everyone. 
Count me in as another person who uses slashes on their 7’s. 

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Jenniferbug, I'm glad you and the family are safe! You're doing the right thing, take lots of pictures and document everything before you clean anything up. I hope the power comes back on sooner rather than later, that's the worst in the hot summer. I saw the weather notices on CNN breaking news today and it sounds like it was bad and hit a really big area across multiple states. WTF, 2020? Enough already!

zoomama, I'm glad you're finally getting answers and they are positive. A friend of mine had to do the camera down her throat recently and she says while it was uncomfortable it wasn't terrible and it was over fairly quickly. 

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@Jenniferbug It's both really frustrating and yet I am so glad things aren't worse. Your family is safe, your house is okay, you don't have to go a shelter during a pandemic, etc. I realise it's upsetting especially since we had storm with the same kind of damage, although not nearly as severe as your damage. I hope you and your family stay safe. I'm sending my sympathies and good wishes. 

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@Jenniferbug, thank goodness you were able to get into the car and get your husband. I am so sorry about your house and yard damage, and hope the insurance will pay for most of it. Sending hugs and positive thoughts for power and repair!

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12 hours ago, Jenniferbug said:

It has been a day.

Around 10:45 this morning my phone alerted me that we were in a severe thunderstorm warning, then I saw some messages from friends who live further west saying they were in basements with power off and very frightened due to the wind.  Husband was out for a run (he had dropped his car off for repairs and had decided to run the few miles home), so I called him, buckled the kids into the car, and picked him up quick since it wasn't doing anything at the moment. Not even 10 minutes after we got home, the sky was black, winds were crazy, and sirens were blowing to get to the basement. We could hear thump after thump of branches falling. We were in the basement for around 90 minutes total, thankfully my kids had their Kindles Kindles enough to play games. 

Thankfully we are safe. Our house is more or less fine. Our yard is a disaster. Huge chunks of our wooden privacy fence are gone. A healthy tree completely split in half, crushed my kids swingset (new to us this summer), took out our fire pit and grill, and barely missed the house (damaged the gutters and hit hard enough to knock pictures off the wall inside). Branches everywhere in the back and front yard. We have a few massive branches down in the side yard and one on the roof of our garage. I'm not even sure what we will do to clean them up. Power is out for most of the state. Phone lines are down in my small town so we can't get hold of insurance so aren't sure what to move and what not to. We're taking multiple pictures of everything just in case. I don't even want to think about how much money we will have to spend (insurance will kick in, but doubt they will cover the full cost of replacing everything that needs repaired). There goes what savings we have 😪 And I will probably have to use vacation time for today until we get power and internet back (estimates right now say Wednesday), because even though the majority of my company is affected, they won't care that we can't work. And we have freezers full of food in the basement just waiting to spoil. 

So. Today sucked. 2020 sucks- even the weather is out to get us. I just needed to vent for a minute, and now I have to preserve phone battery for as long as possible. 

Wow, @Jenniferbug! I'm glad you got your husband home safe before the storm. One beautiful summer day, several years ago, I was walking and admiring the clouds, about 1/2 mile from home, when I realized a storm was forming behind me. I quickened my pace amid tree limbs falling and rushing wind and considered going into our neighborhood clubhouse to wait it out or racing home. A woman with a baby in her car offered me a ride and yes, I did get in a car with a stranger! Turned out she was a neighbor from about 1/2 block from my home. I was so thankful. It was a microburst with lots of trees down. So scary! Anyway, all of the damage is stuff. Luckily your family is safe and sound! 

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7 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

Is quarantine 15 a real thing? It should be.

I’m sure it is. Lack of movement, boredom and comfort is a recipe for weight gain. Everyone I know has been drinking more alcohol and/or eating more sweets during these last months. 
 

I said when we went into quarantine I was NOT gaining weight- I’m already fat no need to add to the problem. I lost 8lbs at the beginning just cooking from scratch all the time and watching portions. I gained back 7 lbs after Mr Norris died with the grief eating, I am now back down 5. I’d like to lose another 10 before my bday. (October) Winter is coming and my pants will be comfortable damn it. I also tend to be my slimmest after winter because I’m bundled in form fitting clothes (satiety signal) and I socialize less so less eating. 
 

Summer means going out all the time, dresses and skirts and stretchy things. I just have to weigh once a week or every other week to stay on top of it. 

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On ‎8‎/‎8‎/‎2020 at 11:02 AM, Ohiopirate02 said:

Has anyone else been watching these brothers discover classic music--

 

I could watch these boys all day.  

Our boys are famous!  My local news did a story on them last night and they hit the big time being featured on The Today Show this morning!  It seems that their video of Phil Collins' ,Something in the Air' now has over a million views and the song itself is now back on the charts, thanks to them.  I feel like a proud auntie!

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On 8/8/2020 at 10:02 AM, Ohiopirate02 said:

Has anyone else been watching these brothers discover classic music--

 

I could watch these boys all day.  

I do enjoy watching them react to the ' new to them'  music. Hopefully they also pass on the joy to their friends.

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21 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

When my grandfather was dying he was calling his wife’s name. She died shortly before him. I do think our loved ones come for us. I have such vivid dreams of my mom I know she’s with me visiting. She deteriorated so quickly I didn’t get to say goodbye or be there when she died. At least I get to see her in my dreams. 
 

Once I almost drowned. I experienced going to paradise and my grandparents picked me up and hugged me and told me to go back. Brains are weird. That was an interesting vision/hallucination/brain needing oxygen. 

Sorry for the novel.

 

I have a novel too.  The night my Mother was buried, late that night, it was pouring rain and the winds were howling like in a movie.  The tree were shaking and there was thunder and lightning too.  I was up and could swear my Mother went up to heaven in the midst of all that.  Her grave was the only one under a big tree.  Weird, I know, but I believe in certain things.  We don’t know what happens.  Sorry to anyone who is grossed out by this.

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Quof, that's amazing, congrats!

I've lost 50+ pounds over the last year and a half and I'm down a few more pounds since quarantine started (I don't get on the scale anymore since I try not to get obsessive with numbers). I've loosened up my modified low carb lifestyle but I'm working out a lot more now because it's so much easier for me to do at home. I don't think I ever want to go back into the office full time again. 

Edited by emma675
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@Jenniferbug, so glad that you and your family are okay, but sorry about all of the damage. My relatives in Iowa had damage as well (trees down, one through the roof). This seems like a weird weather year in many places.

Edited by MargeGunderson
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Chicricket's kitties upthread reminded me of a cute story I saw recently about Pepper and Lola. Such a sweet story.

 

Edited by SunnyBeBe
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1 hour ago, Quof said:

I lost 70+ pounds in 2018, and have maintained my goal weight since then, within a 2 pound range. I worried that I would eat my feelings through quarantine.  I weigh myself every single day, and am down 5 pounds.   I also put on pants with a button and zipper at least a couple of times a week. 

Great for you! Button and zipper are EVERYTHING!

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3 hours ago, crazycatlady58 said:

I do enjoy watching them react to the ' new to them'  music. Hopefully they also pass on the joy to their friends.

this link sent me off on a two hour journey enjoying the videos of these kids.  how fun are they? especially loved when they heard aerosmith for the first time --- very cool!

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12 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

Is quarantine 15 a real thing? It should be.

Well I’ve only gained 8 so I rushed to the freezer and grabbed one of those Magum ice cream pops and sat here eating it without guilt  before writing this. It was cold, creamy and I loved the bits of almond in the chocolate. Debating about a second lol. Thank you GalaxyChaser. I lost all the food in my freezer during the hurricane so today I bought 4 kinds of desserts. Not buying any more meat or good food in bulk until the storm season is over. I had forgotten about the ice cream until now as I’m not used eating treats. 

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I like how they get music. even if it is not their usual music. they get the beat right off, the one fingers an imaginary guitar or keyboard. they appreciate percussion of any and all kinds. they listen to the words and comment on that.

I contrast these guys with every fundie musician that saws away at a violin, hammers away at a piano, makes a CD singing hymns when they can't carry a tune, etc

 

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2 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Chicricket's kitties upthread reminded me of a cute story I saw recently about Pepper and Lola. Such a sweet story.

 

That was so cute!

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5 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Great for you! Button and zipper are EVERYTHING!

It's the only thing between and another 10 pounds right now!

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12 hours ago, Quof said:

I lost 70+ pounds in 2018, and have maintained my goal weight since then, within a 2 pound range. I worried that I would eat my feelings through quarantine.  I weigh myself every single day, and am down 5 pounds.   I also put on pants with a button and zipper at least a couple of times a week. 

Great job on your weight loss and keeping it off, @Quof.

I don’t care if I ever wear anything with a button or zipper again. I am hardly in a bra most days. But, I do try to exercise at least three to four times a week. That makes it ok, right? 

Edited by Love2dance
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So the bad news- still no power. Still no estimate for when we may have power. 

But the good news- the car repair place called yesterday and said since they don't have power, we could pick up my husband's car, which then gave us a vehicle to leave and to charge electronics in (mine is trapped in our garage, we can't get the release on the electric door to open and it's almost out of gas anyway). My husband's fall sports team was rounded up by one of the moms and driven to our house to help with the clean up. It took about 5 hours, but they were able to help us chop and pile everything by the curb. They had been at another house before ours and headed to another after, and I think they're out again today so those boys are amazing. We were able to drive to a nearby town that wasn't hit as hard to get dinner and top off the gas tank. We'll probably do the same tonight. 

We're surviving. We're so lucky compared to others who had much worse damage to their homes. Thanks everyone for the well wishes! ❤

 

IMG9575441.jpg

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Happy to hear you are doing better, @Jenniferbug. Congratulations to the amazing group of young men on your husband’s team who helped you clean up. Hope the rest goes well too. 

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On 8/9/2020 at 2:02 PM, Zella said:

I'm ridiculously happy with how many of my fellow seven slashers are on here. I've never met anyone else in person who does that. 

Anyone else slash their Zs as well? (I also started slashing 7s in French class in seventh grade.)

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2 hours ago, magpye29 said:

Anyone else slash their Zs as well? (I also started slashing 7s in French class in seventh grade.)

Yes I do. 

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On the topic of perfume:

Men are as bad as women with dousing themselves with cologne/aftershave. If I can smell you half a block away and gag it’s too much.

 

 I am sensitive to perfume smells and rarely wear any perfume. 
 

And OMG take a shower and don’t try to cover severe body odor with cologne/perfume. It just makes you smell worse. Gag.

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I also slash my 7s! The fact several of you mentioned you started doing that in French class intrigued me since I am French Canadian (Québécoise to be precise) and I don't recall my teachers enforcing or even teaching us to write 7s that way. Maybe it's more of a European French thing (that then may also translate into how French is taught around the world including the US, given the fact Metropolitan French is the dominant variety). Who knows.

In my case I started slashing my 7s in my early twenties - I had a job where I often had to write short notes to coworkers and even to patients sometimes (with info such as phone or file numbers) and so I wanted to avoid any possible confusion (even though my handwriting is quite clear to start with). Definitely a side effect of being an extreme stickler for clarity 😁

 

Edited by PinkyCupcake
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I slash my sevens (and my z's). I have no idea why. But I did have a great-aunt who referred to it as "European," so maybe you're on to something, PinkyCupcake!

I also curve up the bottoms of my lower case t's when printing, which I copied from a beloved middle school teacher.

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On 8/11/2020 at 11:21 AM, Silver Bells said:

I have a novel too.  The night my Mother was buried, late that night, it was pouring rain and the winds were howling like in a movie.  The tree were shaking and there was thunder and lightning too.  I was up and could swear my Mother went up to heaven in the midst of all that.  Her grave was the only one under a big tree.  Weird, I know, but I believe in certain things.  We don’t know what happens.  Sorry to anyone who is grossed out by this.

My papa died in his bed, peacefully in his sleep.  My grandmother awoke to find him already gone, looking back at a picture of his mother and two aunts from when they were young ladies. I have no doubt in my mind that your loved ones come to get you and help you transition so you’re not afraid.  I find the thought very comforting.  

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Aethera

The Politics Policy is not new, and still applies in the time of Covid-19. Discussion of politicians, political bodies and parties, etc is off-limits here. https://forums.primetimer.com/topic/94644-politics-primetimer-updated-070319/?tab=comments#comment-5402321

 

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