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Small Talk: The Prayer Closet


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Hi everyone,

 

I was reading about the growing Dugger controversy and it got me wondering. I'm a teacher (not in the US) and my grade 7 and 8 health curriculums have stuff to cover about gender identity and sexual orientation in 7 and media stereotypes relating to sexual orientation in grade 8 (The 8s also have "options for unplanned pregnancy"). Given all the debate about marriage rights etc, what, if anything is being taught in the public schools? Anyone know or want to share?

I am very curious how it is in today's schools. When I was in school (in New Jersey, so a fairly liberal school system) our education on GLBT issues was lumped in with AIDS and consisted of our health teacher announcing "I have to teach this but I don't like it". He also thought he could cover the GLBT discussion by showing us a 20 year old tape of Oprah interviewing gay men.

 

Now, that was 15 years ago, and I think things have changed since then. In hindsight, had I been more open with how very gay i was at a young age, I probably could have gone to the school and asked to be removed from that class, since i was wildly uncomfortable the rest of the year with that teacher. But I think things have changed a lot, and more schools (high schools at least) have gay/straight alliances and resources. 

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Strangely, both of my kids have A names, my brother named his kids with S names and my cousin named his 2 with M names. And it was all unplanned, we just chose names that we liked. It will be interesting to see what my cousin and his wife name their third (surprise!) child in February.

 

I will say I was peeved when family members commented not so nicely on my kids names. Andrew and Abigail are supposedly not good names, who knew?

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Hi everyone,

 

I was reading about the growing Dugger controversy and it got me wondering. I'm a teacher (not in the US) and my grade 7 and 8 health curriculums have stuff to cover about gender identity and sexual orientation in 7 and media stereotypes relating to sexual orientation in grade 8 (The 8s also have "options for unplanned pregnancy"). Given all the debate about marriage rights etc, what, if anything is being taught in the public schools? Anyone know or want to share?

I'm not sure about the older grades, since we've only gotten to 6th grade so far, but I am in a similar area as GEML and it's a pretty comprehensive curriculum for sex ed.  It's one full quarter every year from 5th grade on, and they straight out talk about anatomy, puberty, sex, HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases.  We have not gotten yet to unplanned pregnancy but I'm sure that is coming. How knowing that stuff early on would have changed my life!  'Cause goodness knows my parents never saw fit to share the information!   

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I will say I was peeved when family members commented not so nicely on my kids names. Andrew and Abigail are supposedly not good names, who knew?

Wow, I think Andrew and Abigail are lovely, classic names. I've heard some seriously shitastic baby names in my time and yours are definitely not among them. 

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I will say I was peeved when family members commented not so nicely on my kids names.

Ugh. People and their opinions.  It's been nearly 27 years, but I still get cranky remembering my husband's aunt saying, "Lydia?  What kind of a name is Lydia? Haven't you ever heard of Brittany?" I'm not making that up . . . and these sweet comments came from a woman named Mildred. Happily, my daughter Lydia has thanked us many times over the years for NOT naming her Brittany. (In her age group, you can't swing a cat without hitting a Brittany.) And thanks to Aunt Mildred, I learned to smile sweetly and say "How nice!" no matter how much I hate someone's baby name. Because manners.

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Ugh. People and their opinions. It's been nearly 27 years, but I still get cranky remembering my husband's aunt saying, "Lydia? What kind of a name is Lydia? Haven't you ever heard of Brittany?" I'm not making that up . . . and these sweet comments came from a woman named Mildred. Happily, my daughter Lydia has thanked us many times over the years for NOT naming her Brittany. (In her age group, you can't swing a cat without hitting a Brittany.) And thanks to Aunt Mildred, I learned to smile sweetly and say "How nice!" no matter how much I hate someone's baby name. Because manners.

Good God, Mildred? She's one to talk about bad names. Lydia is quite lovely and feminine.

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I was bedridden for a few days after my daughter was born. I have this very clear memory of my brother and sister visiting me, sitting on my bed with me and the baby, making name suggestions. I remember thinking, omg, you've all talked about this and planned your approach to get me to change her name! The name we chose was uncommon in Canada, an old Gaelic (my heritage) name with no fancy or trendy spelling. They were pushing Emily, which is a lovely name, but at the time very popular. I was amused and a little indignant. And stuck to my choice.

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Just wanted to take a moment and thank everyone for their good thoughts and prayers for my surgery this past week. It well, and I should be fully recovered in a few weeks (after 18 months!).

I did think of all of you when I was flipping through the television on Tuesday night and the Amy episode was on. I was still woozy from a lot of the recovery drugs but thinking, "I will have to post that NOT EVEN DRUGS can make this bearable!!"

But I'm very glad to be back to the snark and eye rolls!

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Just wanted to take a moment and thank everyone for their good thoughts and prayers for my surgery this past week. It well, and I should be fully recovered in a few weeks (after 18 months!).

I did think of all of you when I was flipping through the television on Tuesday night and the Amy episode was on. I was still woozy from a lot of the recovery drugs but thinking, "I will have to post that NOT EVEN DRUGS can make this bearable!!"

But I'm very glad to be back to the snark and eye rolls!

. Thanks for checking in with the good news! I hope your recovery continues to progress well.
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Ugh. People and their opinions. It's been nearly 27 years, but I still get cranky remembering my husband's aunt saying, "Lydia? What kind of a name is Lydia? Haven't you ever heard of Brittany?" I'm not making that up . . . and these sweet comments came from a woman named Mildred. Happily, my daughter Lydia has thanked us many times over the years for NOT naming her Brittany. (In her age group, you can't swing a cat without hitting a Brittany.) And thanks to Aunt Mildred, I learned to smile sweetly and say "How nice!" no matter how much I hate someone's baby name. Because manners.

Your post made me smile because almost twenty seven years ago i made a decision like yours! We had decided our son was going to be named Justin and once i saw him in my arms i chose Rory instead. Every single year of school there were a minimum of three Justins in every one of his classes in school.

He loves his name and bullet dodged!

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GEML, happy to hear you're on the mend!

 

I'm loving the new title for this thread.

 

I was born in the late 70's so my classmates were a mish-mash of Stephanies, Jennifers and Heathers. My sister and I both have "K" names which makes me want to hurl every time someone squeals "all K's just like the Kardashians!!!" Thank God neither of us is a Kim or a Kourtney.

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I feel the name thing, except not really?

I legally have a swahili name, and so do. so knowing I am the only one in my school with my name is sort of cool. but at the same time id give anything to be a little bit more known.

(also, it is minor, but i never get those tacky dollar store/gift shop name mugs/magnets/notepads because they never ever say my name sigh.)

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My parents gave me an uncommon (European) spelling of a fairly uncommon English name.  I've never particularly cared for it.  I'm used to responding to anything that remotely sounds like it, since it is so commonly mispronounced/misspelled by others.  I would have rather been an Anna or an Elizabeth or something more common.

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My parents gave me an uncommon (European) spelling of a fairly uncommon English name.  I've never particularly cared for it.  I'm used to responding to anything that remotely sounds like it, since it is so commonly mispronounced/misspelled by others.  I would have rather been an Anna or an Elizabeth or something more common.

yes exactly. 

My parents actually debated calling me Anna (my maternal grandmother literally wanted Anna Celeste or something) but didn't. 

thanks, parents.

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yes exactly. 

My parents actually debated calling me Anna (my maternal grandmother literally wanted Anna Celeste or something) but didn't. 

thanks, parents.

 

I guess we could always go by our middle names - but I like my middle name even less than my first name!  

 

I've heard of parents who let their kids pick their own names when they're 4-5 years old...but I think the world would end up with a lot of Barbies, Princesses, Elsas, Wolverines, or whatever trend it is that kids that age are into.

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Nothing wrong with legally changing your name.  I just recently found out that my MIL, age 94, was named Edith but changed her name to Evelyn as a young adult.  If I hadn't been working on the family genealogy I never would have known!

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Weighing in on the name conversation, I went to school with a ton of Heathers, Michaels, Matts and Katies, I had an unusual old english name that was a female form of my fathers name....so yeah every year at the beginning of the year it was a struggle for the teacher pronounce my name and then to figure out if the name belonged to a boy or a girl.  Around middle school I wanted to change my name so badly due to being picked on but ended up not doing it.  I have learned to appreciate my name since it's a good way to tell if someone calling is a telemarketer or if they actually know me lol.

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My name is Polish, and often misspelled/mispronounced. At least my parents had me spell it with a "v" in it rather than the "w" (which is pronounced like the "v" sound in English) when I first started school. The original spelling is still on all my legal documents, though.

 

I like having an unusual name, but don't actually like MY name. It sounds very choppy to me. Five letters. three syllables and three different vowel sounds. Nothing about it flows together.

 

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I remember a classmate of one of my kids was named Snowflake because her parents saw a flake on the day she was born.

 

Oh boy, names are one of my "issues."  I taught first grade for over 30 years and now work in the graduate admissions office of a large university, handling over 5500 applications a year.  Sometimes it feels like I've seen every name under the sun, from nearly every country on earth.  And this is just my viewpoint but parents, please do your children one favor from the beginning.  Something that costs nothing.  Don't give your children names that rhyme [bob Schwab, Fred Redd, etc], unusual spellings [which usually need to be mentioned umpteen times for the rest of the child's life] or just plain funny or weird names [Crystal Ball]. Good grief, isn't life tough enough without creating additional hassles?  End of cranky soapbox.  PS - all the names here are ones I have actually run into.  No kidding, I could write a book.

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I hate my name (it's not Sew, sorry, lol). It was HUGELY popular about 10 years before I was born, so I meet women with the same name in my Zumba class who aren't of my generation.

 

I guess the good news is, it's so common (albeit not now, at all) that even the teenaged order-takers at Starbucks and Peets can spell it correctly. There is an alternative spelling that one friend from high school was born with, but it's far less common (unlike the 10000 spellings for something like Kayleigh).

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I also detest my name. I was given an uncommon, old lady's name. My class had a bunch of Heathers, Jennifers, Erins and Annas.

I've come across a lot of unusual names in my career. I shit you not: Gym Ball, Misty Spray, Luv Lee, Tom Tompkins, Queen, Princess, Lord Christ etc. It almost makes me grateful for the name that I was stuck with.

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On a different note, sometimes married names can end up rather poetic.  I once knew an amazingly sweet older woman whose name was Violet Underwood. It just struck me as a rather fairytale name and fit her perfectly. I don't know what her maiden name might have been, but if she started out in life as something like Violet Smith, she certainly could have done worse.

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My name was adopted by one of the "stars" of hollywood with a blemished reputation for sleeping with everybody (excluding Bill Cosby) and giggling and swiveling her hips.  So when people hear my name they usually say, "oh, like ___   _____"   Blast it all.  I'd hate to be a Kim K. anything or a Miley now.

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My mother-in-law was a teacher and had twin girls in her class. Their names were "Female 1" and "Female 2". The mom saw their name tags on the bassinets at the hospital and figured the nurses had named them. True story.

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I've always been thankful that while my name is uncommon, it's not unusual. It actually hasn't been on the list of top 1000 baby names in the US since 1997. Sure there can be some weird spellings at times but nobody ever has trouble pronouncing it. Most people I've met with my name are closer in age to my parents. And I'm so glad I wasn't an Amy (at least 4 that I can remember in my graduating class of 150 students) or Heather, forever destined to be known by first name, last initial (Heather C or Amy S)

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Posts like these make me nervous. I'm trying to get pregnant, and my father and I like quite uncommon but very traditional names or preppy names. But, I am making sure the names are easy to make into more usual nicknames.

I know the Duggars like those J names, but I would get bored. But...I guess not very many names make the last name Duggar sound pretty or formal. So, why try?

Edited by Betweenyouandme
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Since we're in a subforum of a board dedicated to religious fundamentalists, the most bizarre name I've seen in that world goes to some Duggar sycophants who named their oldest daughter Heistheway.

 

Yes, they did.

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When I was working in a daycare we had a boy come in and his name was Fisher, I jokingly asked where his brother Hunter was, director looked at me and said, getting off the bus at 3.  Still think they should have had a third and named him Gatherer if that's what they were going for.

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On a different note, sometimes married names can end up rather poetic.  I once knew an amazingly sweet older woman whose name was Violet Underwood. It just struck me as a rather fairytale name and fit her perfectly. I don't know what her maiden name might have been, but if she started out in life as something like Violet Smith, she certainly could have done worse.

That is a super cool name. Like the heroine out of a Harlequin Romance novel or something:)

 

I went to school with a guy named Pat Schmear, so naturally he was renamed Pap Smear.

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Many years ago, I worked with a woman who had 5 children all with R names. When I asked her about it, she said that in her husband's culture (I believe he was Indian, but I don't know what caste), all children were given a name that had the same first initial as the father.

Edited by kalamac
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I used to work as a receptionist and had a coworker named Easter. This was back in the stone ages before voicemail, etc, so I used to write out messages on a pad and leave them on the top of the desk for the workers to come and get. Her sister, Christmas used to call and I'd take a message. Everytime, I had coworkers take the message and throw it out, telling me I wasn't funny.  So I'd have to explain, it was a REAL message and write it out again.

 

Since we're in a subforum of a board dedicated to religious fundamentalists, the most bizarre name I've seen in that world goes to some Duggar sycophants who named their oldest daughter Heistheway.

The old puritans used to do that. I had a book once that commented on the names, but the one that stuck with me was good ol' Sword of the Lord. Fastest way to turn the child from the "way" as anything.

Edited by Catlyn
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Aww, I like Jellybeans as a name. At the very least, it makes a great nickname!

 

So, bringing over from the Jill and Derrick topic--Wal-Mart. My poor mom, at 63, works there. She's been working for Wal-Mart as a cashier for over 10 years. It is as horrible as you can imagine. Also, she's noticed quite a decline in the past few years. They don't want to schedule enough people, so there aren't enough to actually keep the shelves stocked or the departments neat so that you can find what you want to buy. For Thanksgiving, she had to work from 1 pm till 10 pm. And then for Black Friday from 4 am to 12n. So she got less than 6 hours sleep, when you do the math. They suck.

 

And the customers just make it so much worse. I would rather spend extra and go to Target, even if they, too, aren't the best employers. At least the store is clean and I can find what I'm looking for.

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I was a cashier for K-Mart for nine years, and they treat their employees like crap. I applied at Wal-Mart, and the personnel manager called me at home about it. One of the office staff came up and ask why I applied there while I was checking out a customer. Seriously...

 

 I would rather shop at Wal-Mart, ShopKo, Target, and order something online before I step foot in K-Mart again. I do not miss working in retail esp, during the silly season.

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