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Small Talk: The Prayer Closet


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Skittl1321, that is crushing news. i am so saddened. i encourage you to never give up hope BUT to also get as educated as you can. also, not to be callus, but there is an organization called 'now i lay me down to sleep' or something similar. they will be there at the birth and take photos afterward so you can have beautiful memories of your little guy if he does not make it past birth. i hope that helps, a tiny bit.  God carry you through this time.

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Me, too. I am also seriously addicted to the ID station. I used to visit in Colorado Springs, and, after seeing all the episodes about Detective Kenda, I am kinda surprised I am still alive.

No kidding! I have often wondered what the actual murder rate is there. If he personally solved 400 murders - yikes!

ETA:

Skittl1321, I am very sorry to hear of these developments. Sending love to you and yours.

Edited by Tabbygirl521
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OMG, kalamac. What a delicious menu they had. I would have had an awful time choosing. What did you have?

I had the beef entree and the chicken main. They were both very nice. And the wedding cake was both beautiful to look at, and delicious.

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OMG, kalamac. What a delicious menu they had. I would have had an awful time choosing. What did you have?

Sure beats Rice krispie treats & root beer floats in the church parking lot. And you got to sit at a real table.

Skittl1321- So sorry to hear of your news. No matter what, it reminds us that each pending birth is a miracle & blessing. Prayers & hugs coming your way.

On another note, got to love my mom. She'll be 93 soon & going strong & our family is truly blessed. But sometimes she thinks I'm much younger (&naive) than my 50+ years. She got me a few containers of fresh soup at the store, one was Chicken & dumplings. While telling me what flavors she got, she started explaining what dumplings are. I had to stop her & tell her I already knew. Yesterday she was telling me Maureen O'hara died. Once again, she started to explain who she was, movies, etc. I assured her I had heard of her & have even seen some of her movies. One of Mr Barb's favorites is Miracle on 34th Street & I love the original Parent Trap.

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Sure beats Rice krispie treats & root beer floats in the church parking lot. And you got to sit at a real table.

Skittl1321- So sorry to hear of your news. No matter what, it reminds us that each pending birth is a miracle & blessing. Prayers & hugs coming your way.

On another note, got to love my mom. She'll be 93 soon & going strong & our family is truly blessed. But sometimes she thinks I'm much younger (&naive) than my 50+ years. She got me a few containers of fresh soup at the store, one was Chicken & dumplings. While telling me what flavors she got, she started explaining what dumplings are. I had to stop her & tell her I already knew. Yesterday she was telling me Maureen O'hara died. Once again, she started to explain who she was, movies, etc. I assured her I had heard of her & have even seen some of her movies. One of Mr Barb's favorites is Miracle on 34th Street & I love the original Parent Trap.

WOW 93! To our moms we will always be their babies. She sounds very sweet!

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My feeling about all of this miracle products that you can get online or via late night only - First of all, if they truly worked they would be in the drugstore and super market and they would be flying off the shelves! They are easily obtained through a website or phone call and they arrive at your door. Most who order do not use as directed. Let's face it, if they were disciplined enough to,follow a skin/hair care/diet/excersize program they wouldn't be looking for a miracle fix in the first place. 

 

Yeah, dunno how true it is, but my friend once told me that the "secret of Proactiv" is, their scheduled regimen.  The claim was made that if you followed the same scheduled regimen with Ponds, Pears, Dr. Bronner's, whatever, you'd find yourself with the same successful results as Proactiv; that most people with acne, keep it because they're not consistent with their regimen.

 

I have someone in my feed that I had to unfollow. She's a perfectly nice person but on FB it's Beach Body this, Shakeology that, clean eating this, 21fix that with a wall of hashtags. I love hear dearly but she has not changed physically one bit since she started this regiment close to a year ago. I know it makes me sound like a royal bitch but if you're pimping out a product that's supposed to give you a slender, toned, beach body there should be some noticeable change after a year.  

 

Maybe you need to see her naked.  J/k.

 

This friend posts multiple times a day. Pictures of her working out, pics of Shakeology, pics of her workout dvds etc. When her kids wake up in the middle of her 5am workouts, she'll post: 'What do you do when your daughter wakes up in the middle of your workout? Have her videotape you!' This friend rescheduled her son's birthday party so she could hop on a plane and fly to TN and workout with Shaun T in the streets of Nashville with hundreds of other Beachbody coaches.

I had to unfollow her because it was all too much.

 

Obsessive and obnoxious to the poor child, but they say that's what it takes to be and keep in shape - you have to be a body obsessive.  I'll never forget reading this article from Hollywood "celebrity trainers", who said as you imagine, any actress you see warbling on about how "running after and hoisting my kids, is all the exercise I need to keep me trim size zero!  I just eat small balanced meals throughout the whole day", is a bloody liar.  Trainers said several of their clients are those celebrity actress women, one who went to the gym every day including Christmas and her birthday, another who ate nothing but gummy candies, somebody once said Jennifer Aniston eats the same damn baked-potato-and-chicken type boring lunch every day, and has for years.  Julianne Moore won my constant admiration, when she came out in one interview and admitted that basically, she's always hungry.

 

Anyhoo, basically I wanted a chance to admit; I hate Facebook, and can't wait until it goes down in flames.  I was told I needed one for grad school and so I have one, but basically "friending" me is like empty air.  I don't cotton to this stuff where anybody can find you (yes, I know about privacy settings and the like), what I find is most obnoxious, is that little widget saying the last time you were online.  Look, sometimes I just wanna check in online, or follow a page, without everybody knowing that I've been to the site, and wondering why I couldn't be arsed to wander over and comment on their walls or posts.  On a how-to intel page trying to figure out how to hide this option (there is no way), somebody commented, "Facebook is such a stalker app", and I ROTFL'ed for 10 minutes, thinking "Where have you been, babe?  I've known Facebook is a stalker app for like 3 years."

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Obsessive and obnoxious to the poor child, but they say that's what it takes to be and keep in shape - you have to be a body obsessive. I'll never forget reading this article from Hollywood "celebrity trainers", who said as you imagine, any actress you see warbling on about how "running after and hoisting my kids, is all the exercise I need to keep me trim size zero! I just eat small balanced meals throughout the whole day", is a bloody liar. Trainers said several of their clients are those celebrity actress women, one who went to the gym every day including Christmas and her birthday, another who ate nothing but gummy candies, somebody once said Jennifer Aniston eats the same damn baked-potato-and-chicken type boring lunch every day, and has for years. Julianne Moore won my constant admiration, when she came out in one interview and admitted that basically, she's always hungry.

I can't imagine living like that. I remember reading a funny post about Victoria Beckham where the author said she always looks miserable because it's no fun spending 24 hours a day trying to maintain a size zero figure in your 40s.

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I can't imagine living like that. I remember reading a funny post about Victoria Beckham where the author said she always looks miserable because it's no fun spending 24 hours a day trying to maintain a size zero figure in your 40s.

I could never figure out why she looks pissed off all the time. If I woke up every morning to the miracle that is David Beckham, nothing could wipe the smile off of my face.

 

IMHO, of course.

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WOW 93! To our moms we will always be their babies. She sounds very sweet!

She is a great lady & Sharp as a tack (& then some) & in much better health than me. It's sad cuz most of her friends have some type of memory problems & she just can't understand why they don't remember things like they used to.

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I can't imagine living like that. I remember reading a funny post about Victoria Beckham where the author said she always looks miserable because it's no fun spending 24 hours a day trying to maintain a size zero figure in your 40s.

 

I know, I’m not on board with it either.  I like bad food.  I like butter, and cream, and fat (though recently, I note that the nutritionists have started telling us not to skimp on butter or whole milk).  I like cheeseburgers, barbecue, fried foods, cheesecake, girly drinks with fattening sugar syrup, ice cream, and the like.  My gut is not satisfied by such innovations as “soup and salad lunch”, my stomach always thinking “so basically, you're saying you want me to eat… salted hot water, and follow it up with some cold green water, crunched out of vegetables?  Do you know how unsatisfying that sounds?”, etc.  I’ve felt actual raw envy in the past over those “sometimes I just *forget* to eat” people.  (Or, “I’m just not that *interested* in food.”)  How can you “forget to eat”?  lol.  I have gastritis, too, so often it’s literally like my stomach is hollering “FEED ME!”, like that plant from the Little Shop of Horrors.

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She is a great lady & Sharp as a tack (& then some) & in much better health than me. It's sad cuz most of her friends have some type of memory problems & she just can't understand why they don't remember things like they used to.

My mom is 88 and doing well- She is thinking about a move to a center that offers different levels of care. One of the sources of money will be savings bonds that are fully maturing- I asked her why she initially invested in them 40 yrs ago- She started talking about "war time" lol. After I reminded her of my age (She got them when I was 14- and I don't think The Vietnam War was the reason) I suggested it was back when the banks were giving gifts for deposits (we have furniture and pewter pieces from those good old days!)  lol

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There's nothing like an upcoming surgery to get a person motivated to do things around the house! This weekend I fixed the guest bathroom toilet, re-caulked the main shower, cooked a ton of food, hit the grocery store and ordered a bunch of bath stuff from Amazon (since I won't be able to shower for a few days after surgery). Next weekend I'm getting my hair touched up, taking the car in for its annual inspection, washing the dog, getting a few things waxed and having a pedicure. I think nervousness sends me into overdrive.

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Skittl, I was just thinking of you the other day because I thought you must be getting close to delivery by now. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, it must be heart wrenching. You don't have to post if you're not up to it, but I'm curious what alerted the medical team to know there were issues to start with? Did I miss that? (Probably). I can't even imagine the anxiety and stress you must be living with. Such a difficult time for you. Big hugs for you!!!

I'm saying FB has become sort of a marginalized version of Pinterest. If I want recipes, I'll google them, or go to Pinterest. I'd rather see family news. "We're at Disney" or REAL news (births, deaths, celebrations) that doesn't include what you're making for dinner. I too have friends out the wazoo who use FB for a spring board into Beach Body, the makeup thing, and Thiry-One. And I too have a friend who's tried them all. She stuck with Thirty One for a long time, and it seemed lucrative for her. But they must have broken up because just today, I saw a pitch she posted about Tupperware. TUPPERWARE!!! I really hate all the hype and sales pitch going on, but Beach Bodies is the worst. I have a friend who "seemed" normal and sane and pretty well together....who is about to be unfriended. She is Beach Bodying me to death!!! Kids drinking yummy shakes. Hubby drinking delicious shakes. SHE's drinking shakeology - until I want to punch her out!!! Before and after pics, Workout pics, pep rally pics, conference pics. Holy cow!!! What HAPPENED to her???

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.

Wasn't sure where to share this, but since this was written by a friend of my online friend I met years ago by buying,selling,and collecting Beanie Babies, it's kind of personal. So I guess I'll put it here.

BTW, I met so many people all over the USA and Canada selling those little stuffed bags of beans,so don't judge.

I swear they had some kind of crack in them.

It was temporary insanity, plus, I had an inside connection.

I was an Rx tech in a pharmacy that sold them, and we got first crack at them.

Now you know why people couldn't get ahold of the ones they were looking for...because of people like me with no Beanie Baby morals.

Anyway..this guy's religious humor cracks me up

(side note..he was homeschooled)

Here's a taste of what he wrote about wearing

costumes to church fall festivals:

(Written by Matthew Pierce)

The Praymate

The Playboy Bunny is always a popular women’s costume, but why should the devil have all the fun? Put a wholesome, flirty twist on the bunny concept by wearing a pair of oversized ears atop a billowing, floor-length dress. [Can be combined with a denim skirt for homeschool mothers] IMPORTANT NOTE: resist the urge to attach the cotton tail to your backside, as this will cause Butt Sin.http://matthewepierce.com/butt-sin-a-primer/http://matthewepierce.com/costume-ideas-for-the-halloween-festival/

Edited to add: sorry SO lengthy..I'm a little manic this week

Edited by ChiCricket
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Skittl, I was just thinking of you the other day because I thought you must be getting close to delivery by now. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, it must be heart wrenching. You don't have to post if you're not up to it, but I'm curious what alerted the medical team to know there were issues to start with? Did I miss that? (Probably). I can't even imagine the anxiety and stress you must be living with. Such a difficult time for you. Big hugs for you!!!

I'm saying FB has become sort of a marginalized version of Pinterest. If I want recipes, I'll google them, or go to Pinterest. I'd rather see family news. "We're at Disney" or REAL news (births, deaths, celebrations) that doesn't include what you're making for dinner. I too have friends out the wazoo who use FB for a spring board into Beach Body, the makeup thing, and Thiry-One. And I too have a friend who's tried them all. She stuck with Thirty One for a long time, and it seemed lucrative for her. But they must have broken up because just today, I saw a pitch she posted about Tupperware. TUPPERWARE!!! I really hate all the hype and sales pitch going on, but Beach Bodies is the worst. I have a friend who "seemed" normal and sane and pretty well together....who is about to be unfriended. She is Beach Bodying me to death!!! Kids drinking yummy shakes. Hubby drinking delicious shakes. SHE's drinking shakeology - until I want to punch her out!!! Before and after pics, Workout pics, pep rally pics, conference pics. Holy cow!!! What HAPPENED to her???

My friend was the same way and then BOOM! All Beachbody all the time. Don't get me wrong, it works. She's lost several pounds but it has left her looking a bit gaunt and she's lost her youthful glow. It really has become an obsession for her. She used to be normal, now she's become a crazed fanatic about it.

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Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks? All your posts have made me very aware that I am guilty as sin of posting anything *I* find funny, amazing, and interesting on Facebook.

I do know better. I 'hide' a lot of people who annoy ME with religion,politics,veganism, etc. I don't unfriend them because they'd eventually find out.

I need to take a seat and stop over sharing.

I just now made a Facebook messenger group with only my own five "kids" (who are in their 30's and 40's!) that I can use to share whatever I want to my hearts content.

I then called all five and told them each to feel free to mute all notifications for that group, and that I expected NO comments or likes.

(We have a "just us" group for disseminating family info already)

I named the group "stuffyoudontneedtoread"

Seriously,I needed this heads up! Thanks

Edited by ChiCricket
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ChiCricket, you are wonderful!  Too bad you aren't on my FB page.  Maybe you should be since I already disallow posts on my feed from almost everybody I know.  I didn't unfriend them.  I see the good thing about it as a way to get in touch if you want to say hi once in awhile.  Now my problem is getting rid of 3 Million Dogs and all those radio stations not connected to anybody.  One out of 5 or 10 things is cute, IMO, the rest, meh.  

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I owe Michelle Duggar an apology. While I still disapprove of the spectacle they made of Jubilee's passing, and I still question her changing 'miscarriage' to 'stillborn' to make it somehow feel more grand, I apologize for ever making comments that minimized her suffering.

 

We were told this week that it is unlikely my baby will be born alive, and if he is, it is very possible he will only live a few moments, or possibly longer but not make it home. If the Duggars felt even a fraction of the pain I have felt these past few days, then I am truly sorry for making flippant comments about how they dealt with their loss.

Oh dear god, I'm so sorry for you and your family's loss. Virtual hugs and real thoughts coming your way.

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I could never figure out why she looks pissed off all the time. If I woke up every morning to the miracle that is David Beckham, nothing could wipe the smile off of my face.

 

IMHO, of course.

Isn't she trying to avoid smile lines? (thought I heard that at one point) 

Edited by springtime
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My friend was the same way and then BOOM! All Beachbody all the time. Don't get me wrong, it works. She's lost several pounds but it has left her looking a bit gaunt and she's lost her youthful glow. It really has become an obsession for her. She used to be normal, now she's become a crazed fanatic about it.

No, the Beachbody shakes don't work long term. Of course your friend has lost weight, because she's on meal-replacement shakes vs. real food. That's also probably the reason she doesn't look so good. The exercise component of BB IS good, but no better than what you would get from classes at your local Y or fitness club, and a helluva lot more expensive. Eating proper portions of real, balanced, healthy foods paired with whatever exercise you like is the best way to lose & maintain weight.

I hate to ask, but what is Beach Body? It hasn't popped up in my FB feed yet and I'm a little scared to google it, lol!

Beach Body is a multi-level marketing/pyramid scheme. Distributors are called "coaches" though they have little or no nutrition or fitness training experience. They push two main products: Shakeology, which are meal replacement shakes that cost just under $200 for a monthly supply (they hook you by getting an auto-renew subscription that is so hard to get out of that people have had to cancel their credid cards). The other product is workout DVDs (developed by Shaun T, creator of the popular Insanity workouts, similar to but not as intense as P90X). The fitness stuff is good, but you can get the DVDs outside of BeachBody. Or better yet, get anyone else's DVDs...or better still, find a local fitness class you like and support them! The program may work short term, but who lives on meal replacement shakes more than a couple of months?

Sorry for going long, but the other board/forum I'm on regularly is anti-MLM, and I've learned a lot between my own experience with one and those of others on the site. Only 1-2% of people ever make money in these schemes. Just beware and use common sense--if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is, and look for a catch, because there is ALWAYS a catch! :-)

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I have started to "run" (more like trot) 4 miles in a running group with three other ladies at 4:00 am. I have only gone once since Houston is flooding at the moment, but we are supposed to meet 3x a week. There is something surreal about running that early in the morning, running down streets in the darkness and everything is so, so quiet. I like the cooler temperatures and that I almost have 10,000 steps before I would usually be even out of bed in the morning, and I get back in time to get my daughter ready for school. What I don't like is the fear that I have that the boogie man is going to get me. We run by a creek with woods on one side and the whole time I am looking to make sure no one is going to jump out and grab me. I am always the slowest in the herd. I may as well be a sheep dragging a limp leg behind me! I watch a lot of ID which already feeds into my paranoid personality. I am thinking I might buy my first pepper spray.

 

Anyway, I am use the C25K app by Zen Labs which I highly recommend and is free. It really helps pace yourself so you can build stamina to get through an entire 5k without stopping. Bonus for me is I am running with my cousin-in-law and she has a ton of Starbucks gift cards she gets as teacher thank you gifts and she does not drink coffee...so she treats me!

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Skittl, I'm so sorry to read about your little one. Sending you positive vibes and hopes for better news.

PS: Lip's SP dress! My eyes! :D

 

Thank you (and everyone else as well. I appreciate the support.)

 

The dress would have been fine if her gloves had matched AT ALL. And if it had anything to do with the music...

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Skittl, I was just thinking of you the other day because I thought you must be getting close to delivery by now. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, it must be heart wrenching. You don't have to post if you're not up to it, but I'm curious what alerted the medical team to know there were issues to start with? Did I miss that? (Probably). I can't even imagine the anxiety and stress you must be living with. Such a difficult time for you. Big hugs for you!!!

I'm saying FB has become sort of a marginalized version of Pinterest. If I want recipes, I'll google them, or go to Pinterest. I'd rather see family news. "We're at Disney" or REAL news (births, deaths, celebrations) that doesn't include what you're making for dinner. I too have friends out the wazoo who use FB for a spring board into Beach Body, the makeup thing, and Thiry-One. And I too have a friend who's tried them all. She stuck with Thirty One for a long time, and it seemed lucrative for her. But they must have broken up because just today, I saw a pitch she posted about Tupperware. TUPPERWARE!!! I really hate all the hype and sales pitch going on, but Beach Bodies is the worst. I have a friend who "seemed" normal and sane and pretty well together....who is about to be unfriended. She is Beach Bodying me to death!!! Kids drinking yummy shakes. Hubby drinking delicious shakes. SHE's drinking shakeology - until I want to punch her out!!! Before and after pics, Workout pics, pep rally pics, conference pics. Holy cow!!! What HAPPENED to her???

 

No, not that close to delivery yet- I'm due at the very end of January; so 26 weeks right now. I don't know if he'll make it that long, of course... My husband hasn't been coming to appts with me (except 2 of the ultrasounds where you get to see the baby), and I told him he has to now; I don't think I could bring home the news that the baby's heart has stopped and I'll have to be induced. I'm so praying it doesn't come to that.

 

The reason I got sent to a specialist is that my 20 week ultrasound which literally reads "No abnormalities", said he was small growth (about 2%... which is very small, but I'm a pretty small person.) So I got sent back for a standard 4 week follow up.  The goal there was to see if he had grown more, or at least kept up.  He had- he was measuring 2% again, however, in that ultrasound a cleft lip/cleft palate was noted, along with no nose bone (which is a marker for Down's syndrome, although my integrated screen earlier in the pregnancy showed very low risk for that, and now the genetic tests does show he doesn't have it.)  So those things got me sent to the specialist.

 

Since the baby doesn't have Trisomy 13/18, now I just don't know what to think. I don't know if I'm counting down until he passes away, or if I'm waiting to find out if he survives after birth. If he does survive, he could have some very difficult complications, and some difficult but fixable ones. It seems like individually almost everything found could mean something awful, or nothing at all. The specialist was, in no uncertain terms, complete gloom. The baby WILL die. (Of course, she thought he had trisomy 18- based on all the markers that were coming up in the ultrasound.) The nurse on the phone was way too optimistic, that I don't believe it is true. So hopefully this week when I go to the high risk OB I can get a better picture of which end I'm really on.  It's a lot of stress, but my husband and I are trying to do as many things as we can to keep ourselves distracted and to create a scrapbook of things we did "with the baby".  And then if everything goes right, we'll do them all again with our little boy.

 

 

In the spirit of pretending my troubles don't exist (because no one ever knows what will happen with their children): I hate when people use facebook as pinterest.  "Sharing this to my wall so I can find it later!" recipes: um, how, how exactly do you plan to find it later? You have to scroll through years of postings. Just pin the darn thing!  And oh, the MLM sales.  I've had to unfollow multiple good friends because of Beachbody (and Jamberry, and Younique, and all kinds of jewelry). One of my friends is incredibly successful with it, both in weight loss and maintaining for years and financially. She quit her job as an aerospace engineer to do BB; but I do not need to see a daily selfie of her all sweaty drinking her shake. 

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Skittl1321 - sounds like for the most part the medical professionals are making "educated guesses". Maybe all will be well - maybe not. They don't know for sure either except for maybe the cleft? One of the three babies I mentioned before is a normal tiny girl who is 6 months old. Her parents (who are religious. The daddy is an episcopal priest) were told by the "specialist" to abort. Tiny baby, issues. Wouldn't survive. She was born early and is a fine smiling baby. I hope this is your case too. My point is really that no one *knows* how your son will be - they are all making educated guesses. Let's keep hoping they guessed wrong. Sending ffcyberhugs during this waiting time which must be excrutiating.

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I have started to "run" (more like trot) 4 miles in a running group with three other ladies at 4:00 am. I have only gone once since Houston is flooding at the moment, but we are supposed to meet 3x a week. There is something surreal about running that early in the morning, running down streets in the darkness and everything is so, so quiet. I like the cooler temperatures and that I almost have 10,000 steps before I would usually be even out of bed in the morning, and I get back in time to get my daughter ready for school. What I don't like is the fear that I have that the boogie man is going to get me. We run by a creek with woods on one side and the whole time I am looking to make sure no one is going to jump out and grab me. I am always the slowest in the herd. I may as well be a sheep dragging a limp leg behind me! I watch a lot of ID which already feeds into my paranoid personality. I am thinking I might buy my first pepper spray.

 

Anyway, I am use the C25K app by Zen Labs which I highly recommend and is free. It really helps pace yourself so you can build stamina to get through an entire 5k without stopping. Bonus for me is I am running with my cousin-in-law and she has a ton of Starbucks gift cards she gets as teacher thank you gifts and she does not drink coffee...so she treats me!

 

I have this same fear when I run by myself, which I basically do every time I run now. I am absolutely terrified to run at my home town by myself because of some scary instances that have happened, and I've had to get over it in the new city I'm in. There are some woods right by campus that I found a couple weeks ago that I absolutely love running in, but I am so aware that there's a possibility I could go in there and never come back! I've started running with my phone just in case, which I've never done before. I would rather run without any technology at all, but I'm definitely in the minority with that preference. 

 

I don't have a lot of friends who do the BB/Shakeology stuff (or at least that pop up on my feed), but I did go through this phase where I followed all of those workout people on Instagram and they sold that stuff non-stop. I finally stopped following them because a.) they weren't telling me anything I didn't already know and b.) I don't believe in using that kind of stuff. My friend who got married this summer basically starved herself as soon as she got engaged (last November). She's absolutely beautiful and doesn't need to diet, but her weakness is greasy bar food and alcohol in general (as in she drinks every day). When she stopped eating and drinking the bad stuff and working out she lost a lot of weight, but she was also starving herself by just eating 8 oz of turkey for dinner and apples and water throughout the day. Regardless, two months later and she constantly complains about how she wishes she could still be at her wedding weight. I was like, "I told you you'd gain all that weight back once you started eating and drinking like you normally do!" I don't understand how people think briefly starving themselves with no nutrients will help them lose the weight they want and KEEP it off. 

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Maintenance is really hard. I am good at losing and I am good at gaining. My weight isn't horrendous, I could drop ten. What I need to do is tone. My husband went on one of those Quick Weight Loss diets call the "Q" and they put you on a three day detox of nothing but chicken and water and then you are on a low cal diet that is very restrictive and it totally works. He dropped 40 pounds and looked great. He even seemed happier than he had in years (with all of our baby drama he was eating his feelings and ballooned up). But the diet is boring. When whomever mentioned Aniston and her baked potato and chicken every day it reminded me of that. What you can eat is so limited, there are only so many ways to combine the ingredients to come up with tasty dishes. So he drops the whole thing and starts eating like a maniac again and now he is down only 15. I guess 15 is still good, but he had to buy a crap ton of supplements and shakes and special foods to go with it. There are cheaper more effective ways to lose weight.

 

I am a supportive wife so I went on it with him and cooked all his meals at night. I would recommend a website called three fat chicks on a diet. It has a thread for every diet you can imagine, support threads, exercise threads, and the best: recipe threads that are grouped by diet so you can find a trove of recipes that are specific for whatever you are restricting. Sometimes I go there just to get inspiration for what to make for dinner.

 

eta: And as far as medical experts go, unless there is hard proof, take it with a grain of salt. I have had a renowned expert in her field tell me that my child was blind and all the hell and rabbit holes that sent me down still anger me to this day. Only doctor I have ever fired and will bad mouth all over town. She is retired now thankfully. My daughter has some visual issues due to her brain damage, but she can see very well and is not even legally blind. Far, far, far from it. She saw a clear cellophane wrapper on the floor of the testing room, picked it up, and handed it to the doctor. Not blind.

 

And I had a pulmonology consult with the head of pulmonology while my daughter was in the NICU. He told me that her lung damage was irreversible and to enjoy the time I had left with her and to start making funeral arrangements. The NICU doctor was so horrified by what he was telling me he contradicted him to his face in front of me. Because he was totally wrong. I would go into the building and pass that man in the hallway and I would start shaking and crying. He had the shortest tenure of "head of pulmonology" that I know of...maybe 6 months. I have to think our case had something to do with it. Both of these conversations with doctors were dropped on me by my child's bedside without my husband there to help cushion the emotional blow. They professionals don't sugar coat it either. Anyway, the point is...have faith. Often they are just trying to tell you the worst case scenario just in case, but don't make any rash decisions because it could all be a steaming pile of crap.

Edited by XinaMarie
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Often they are just trying to tell you the worst case scenario just in case, but don't make any rash decisions because it could all be a steaming pile of crap.

The doctor did present me with termination options (well, one option. This late apparently there is only one clinic in the united states that does it... it can't be done in my state) but thankfully did not pressure me in anyway. I've heard too many stories of doctors pushing that, or not offering it. Either is scary to me. She actually suggested that I wait the two weeks to get full results, because so late in the game, time really isn't of the essence anymore.  We've decided against it, for many reasons- 1) I know the kid now, I couldn't do that; 2) it's actually riskier to my health than carrying the baby; 3) Doctors might just be completely wrong; 4) I think mentally, this late in the game it would be harder to process than the loss of a child naturally, and 5) Holy crap the money! (Smallest reason... money would be a non-issue if it was the choice we wanted to make, but between the procedure, a week in a hotel, and airfare, we were talking $15k! Basically, giving birth without insurance.)

 

But we do need enough information to decide if we sign a DNR in the NICU.  Hopefully by the time delivery comes we have enough information to make that decision rationally. Because the baby will probably need some life support equipment when he is born. And if he has a chance at a functional life, I want to give him that. But if he doesn't, I don't want to prolong suffering.

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All of you gals out running in the dark are making me nervous. I feel like I have to say please be aware of your surroundings , always follow your instincts if something seems menacing it probably is, please vary your routine and lastly never let anyone take you to a second location.

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My daughter loved Singing In The Rain at a young age too - Moses supposes his toes are roses....

 

Same here, and all the old musicals.  She's a dance major (pre-med guidance track) and an amazing performer.  Triple threat actually. (sorry for the proud mama moment)

 

I apologize for ever making comments that minimized her suffering.

 

Dear Skittl1321, don't apologize for anything.  You now have an awareness that you did not before.  I'm hoping that you get much better news as you move through this process, and all my best thoughts and hopes are with you. ♥

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Skittl, I am so sorry to read your devastating news. I saw this a few days ago and you've been on my mind since. I hesitated to say anything, because I don't want to minimize what you're going through, but like others, I know of several babies who were "doomed." Two are perfectly healthy, and the other has physical limitations but is otherwise a happy, healthy kid. I pray that these tests will shed light on what's happening and give you peace going forward. (You're saying "he"... this is a son you're expecting? )

No, the Beachbody shakes don't work long term. Of course your friend has lost weight, because she's on meal-replacement shakes vs. real food. That's also probably the reason she doesn't look so good. The exercise component of BB IS good, but no better than what you would get from classes at your local Y or fitness club, and a helluva lot more expensive. Eating proper portions of real, balanced, healthy foods paired with whatever exercise you like is the best way to lose & maintain weight. Beach Body is a multi-level marketing/pyramid scheme. Distributors are called "coaches" though they have little or no nutrition or fitness training experience. They push two main products: Shakeology, which are meal replacement shakes that cost just under $200 for a monthly supply (they hook you by getting an auto-renew subscription that is so hard to get out of that people have had to cancel their credid cards). The other product is workout DVDs (developed by Shaun T, creator of the popular Insanity workouts, similar to but not as intense as P90X). The fitness stuff is good, but you can get the DVDs outside of BeachBody. Or better yet, get anyone else's DVDs...or better still, find a local fitness class you like and support them! The program may work short term, but who lives on meal replacement shakes more than a couple of months?

YES.

Co-sign me to all of that. I've been approached several times about using it to get back in shape after baby. Right. Because I'm so fat, thanks.

I could never say this in real life, because it sounds so snotty, but here's the thing -- baby is 3 months old, and I'm 5 pounds from pre-baby size. My size 4 pants fit, and I've dropped weight quickly enough that it's complicated breastfeeding supply. (Not on purpose. I have a small build anyway, I'm really busy chasing the older kids, and it's just fallen off in the last month.) So, while it's annoying enough to be told that I should buy hundreds of dollars of crap so a casual acquaintance can finance a Disney trip, it's something else when the "fitness coach" has 50+ pounds on me and was a couch potato until six weeks ago.

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I have started to "run" (more like trot) 4 miles in a running group with three other ladies at 4:00 am. I have only gone once since Houston is flooding at the moment, but we are supposed to meet 3x a week. There is something surreal about running that early in the morning, running down streets in the darkness and everything is so, so quiet. I like the cooler temperatures and that I almost have 10,000 steps before I would usually be even out of bed in the morning, and I get back in time to get my daughter ready for school. What I don't like is the fear that I have that the boogie man is going to get me. We run by a creek with woods on one side and the whole time I am looking to make sure no one is going to jump out and grab me. I am always the slowest in the herd. I may as well be a sheep dragging a limp leg behind me! I watch a lot of ID which already feeds into my paranoid personality. I am thinking I might buy my first pepper spray.

Anyway, I am use the C25K app by Zen Labs which I highly recommend and is free. It really helps pace yourself so you can build stamina to get through an entire 5k without stopping. Bonus for me is I am running with my cousin-in-law and she has a ton of Starbucks gift cards she gets as teacher thank you gifts and she does not drink coffee...so she treats me!

The hubby is a runner; he ran the Marine Corps Marathon yesterday. I act the same way when he is away or has duty. I get nervous when I go to bed at night. when I turn out the lights at night, I get paranoid that someone knows exactly when I go to bed at night. I definitely sleep better when the hubby is home.

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Beach Body is a multi-level marketing/pyramid scheme. Distributors are called "coaches" though they have little or no nutrition or fitness training experience. They push two main products: Shakeology, which are meal replacement shakes that cost just under $200 for a monthly supply (they hook you by getting an auto-renew subscription that is so hard to get out of that people have had to cancel their credid cards). The other product is workout DVDs (developed by Shaun T, creator of the popular Insanity workouts, similar to but not as intense as P90X). The fitness stuff is good, but you can get the DVDs outside of BeachBody. Or better yet, get anyone else's DVDs...or better still, find a local fitness class you like and support them! The program may work short term, but who lives on meal replacement shakes more than a couple of months?

I was about to ask if it was MLM. My next door neighbor who is about 25 years my junior is really into that weight loss routine and is looking really great.  She keeps mentioning Shakeology and now is mentioning dvds.  I think she may be a "coach" herself now. 

I do know one person who is at the top of an MLM--he sells for Zurvita which puts out a vitamin supplement called Zeal; I am trying it for a month.

 

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Skittl....(You're saying "he"... this is a son you're expecting? )

 it's something else when the "fitness coach" has 50+ pounds on me and was a couch potato until six weeks ago.

 

First- thank you for your comments. I'm really really hoping things turn out "okay". (There will definetly be things that will require several major surgeries, but "common" as far as birth defects go. The rest- who knows...)   Yes, I'm expecting a son. :) 

 

And flipping topics...

The thing that really gets me is all these "fitness coaches" are acting in the role of nutritionist and personal trainer. Both things that (my state at least) require a license to be. I'm well read, so I know a lot about the stuff BB spouts. I had someone approach me to be a "coach" and I told them no, I haven't actually been successful with any of the exercise programs and hate shakeology. What good is an overweight fitness coach?  I was told "everyone is on a different stage of their journey"- but seriously, I'd rather have a nutritionist and a personal trainer!  That said, I do like a number of their workout programs.

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One of my best friends from college was all about the whole Beach Body/Shakeology thing, at least until the boyfriend and she broke up and now she's posting less than once a day and never about that.  Which is good, because the whole testimonial text/image posts on FB are super f*cking annoying.  It's one thing if someone wants to just post a status update about their routine, but the minute you start throwing pictures into the mix, you piss me off.  Now you're just wasting people's data.

 

The other one that pisses me off is Orangetheory Fitness, which is apparently a chain of gyms that offer post-exercise oxygenation.  It's the new Crossfit, which is the new P90X, which is the new Insanity which is the new ... you get the picture.  Whatevs.  Leave me and my 12 hour days and 4 hour commutes and 4 hours of sleep a night here with my cigarettes and my coffee.  I'll outlive you all!

Edited by Lemur
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The other one that pisses me off is Orangetheory Fitness, which is apparently a chain of gyms that offer post-exercise oxygenation.  It's the new Crossfit, which is the new P90X, which is the new Insanity which is the new ... you get the picture.  Whatevs.  Leave me and my 12 hour days and 4 hour commutes and 4 hours of sleep a night here with my cigarettes and my coffee.  I'll outlive you all!

 

 

You are my soulmate, Lemur. I'm having a cigarette right now with my coffee and just finished reading about the World Health Organization's press conference announcing a definitive link between eating red meat and cancer, and all I can think is I can't wait until dinner because I have a big ole' steak ready for the grill...  ;)

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Last week we discussed candy and Thanksgving.  Is there a special tradition your family or you do during the holiday season.  I go to House of Holiday in Queens ny and then go see lights in  Dyker Heights in Brooklyn  and of course i stop at Spumi Gardens to get pizza.

Edited by amitville
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You are my soulmate, Lemur. I'm having a cigarette right now with my coffee and just finished reading about the World Health Organization's press conference announcing a definitive link between eating red meat and cancer, and all I can think is I can't wait until dinner because I have a big ole' steak ready for the grill...  ;)

 

And I am jealous of your steak! I love me some red meat, there's no way I'm going stop eating it. My philosophy is everything in moderation, unless it's root beer or oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. If it's either of those then all bets are off. With those moderation is something that doesn't exist! 

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Isn't she trying to avoid smile lines? (thought I heard that at one point) 

 

Good grief. If that is the reason why Victoria Beckham never smiles, I can only say this. Victoria, who cares? Really. Who gives a damn how well-preserved you are or how beautiful you remain as you age  - if to achieve it, you have to look miserable all the time? 

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And I am jealous of your steak! I love me some red meat, there's no way I'm going stop eating it. My philosophy is everything in moderation, unless it's root beer or oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. If it's either of those then all bets are off. With those moderation is something that doesn't exist! 

How are you feeling?

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Last year we had something totally absurd happen. The last couple years I have been making sugar and gingerbread cookies and putting out icing and sprinkles so people can decorate their own cookies.

My niece had elaborately decorated a gingerbread man and left it on the table to harden overnight. Some of us were up talking about how hilarious it would be if someone kidnapped the gingerbread man (because our niece is very serious about candy and treats).

I went to bed and in the morning the outline of the cookie was on s napkin along with a ransom note. After that it got crazy. Interrogations, handwriting analysis, reconstructing the crime scene. This went on for days. My niece even got an email sent to her from the kidnapper taunting her.

She left to go home and then some time after New Years the cookie was Priority Mailed to her along with a police report describing what happened and who did it and why.

No one had ever confessed to this but I am pretty sure her name is MOM and I want to know how she is going to top herself this year.

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