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S01.E07: Episode 7


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Sarah & Robert were in the hot tub for a while, so he must have gotten completely dressed after that.  Even if sex wasn't on the table, why wouldn't he leave the bathrobe on,  just for comfort?  Or maybe, he was afraid Sarah was going to try & get one-handed with him under the robe. 

 

Wow, Neil Lane must have flown right to Mexico to give Marcus that rock!

Edited by leighdear
  • Love 6
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Ok, the end update credits were awesome! 

 

I was just about to say that too.  Love the end credits and blooper reel. 

 

Guess Cody training Chris will be a clip in the first episode come January.   Hope to see everyone then for more craziness!!

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Ok, the end update credits were awesome!

Unfortunately, I thought the credits were the best past of the episode. What a snooze fest!! No AsshLee drama when Graham gave her the boot? No reunion?!? No Elise?!? Zzzzzzzzzz

  • Love 1
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Speaking of sweat, now that he's a producer as well as the host, Chris Harrison was no doubt relieved to announce that BIP will return next summer.

 

Chris and the rest are hoping that the dazzling ring and the telegraphed surprise will mask several facts, including:

a) The outcome was serendipity.  They had no idea how to set up the ending, what rules might produce a 'win' now or in future etc.

b) The two-sided (two-gender) elimination format is self-defeating i.e. if they reduce competition each week (with or without intruders) they will reduce drama proportionally.  Again, the two loved-up couples saved them from potential disaster.

c) An almost total lack of variety in activities and locations combined with a lack of funds as exhibited by the un-posh lodging and dining may come back to bite them.

 

Fair play to Marcus who finally admitted under repeated questioning that he had a keen interest in the bounty nature bestowed on Lacy.

 

Chris and the other producers were considering renaming BIP 'The Michelle Money Show' but since she's paired up (for now) and ineligible for yet another contract they will stick with the original title. We'll just have to manage without Michelle appearing constantly on-screen, using the word 'like' 14 times in three sentences and incessantly misusing 'literally,' often in the contradictory phrase 'literally like.'

Edited by Rainsong
  • Love 4
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THAT was the Big Twist? Chris Harrison telling everyone they had to be honestly a couple or they had to go home? And all of these idiots proceeded to act as if they'd better cut and run if they weren't Honestly A Couple, because otherwise . . . . ? What? Chris would declare them all common-law-married and they'd have to go home and live together FOREVER??! Because -- no divorce if you aren't fully honest with Chris Harrison? (I'm just wondering exactly what would have happened if Tasos and Christy (?) had shrugged their shoulders and said to each other, "Hey, let's go for it and see what happens. I mean, we can always break up on the way home, and what if there's some awesome prize on the line?")

  • Love 16
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So are they going to trot out Marcus and Lacey now with the other "winner couples" every time it's the advice episode?

I think the raccoon could do a better job.

But I have to say I loved the editing of BiP. Never taking itself seriously and unabashedly ripping on the contestants. The crazy clown music, the awesome sound bites. Loved it.

  • Love 4
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I'm glad the show got picked up for a second season because this was so much more fun than the main show! I feel like they might have hit gold with this particular cast, though... I don't see how they can top the antics of this season and the actual "true love" that was found. I think they'll probably have better dates and locations next season, but part of the show's charm was the fact that no one really knew what the heck was going to happen, so I'm interested to see how next season goes. (I somehow doubt they'll be lucky enough to find a couple who'll want to get engaged again.)

  • Love 2
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You know, maybe AshLee wasn't the right woman for Graham, but shouldn't that have been his decision to make, and not Michelle's?  I thought Michelle was out of line trying to break them up.   If AshLee and Graham had continued their relationship on their own, he probably would have come to realize soon enough that she wasn't the woman he thought she was in "paradise."  I don't know.  It just seemed to me like Michelle was jealous that Graham was with any woman other than her.

  • Love 8
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The ending out takes and updates were hysterical!   It poked fun at itself and brought it all into perspective.  Bravo, well done!   Without this finish I am not sure I would leave loving it as much as I did.  They should do this on the bach, too. 

 

I adore Michelle, always have and thrilled that she and Cody are in love.  

 

Robert and Sarah, you will never be asked to do anything on TV ever again.  You are both dull and humorless.  


Sarah & Robert were in the hot tub for a while, so he must have gotten completely dressed after that.  Even if sex wasn't on the table, why wouldn't he leave the bathrobe on,  just for comfort?  Or maybe, he was afraid Sarah was going to try & get one-handed with him under the robe.

 

Wow, Neil Lane must have flown right to Mexico to give Marcus that rock!

 

 

How deliciously snarky!  

  • Love 3
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This show was so boring for the first hour; then it got better at the end, and then we got the credits, which were hilarious. Question: Would they still have invited Des and Chris to show up and dispense advice if Brooks had been one of the final couples?

 

Also, is Molly pregnant, or recently post-pregnant? 

 

I did feel sorry for AshLee a little bit, mainly because she looked kind of pretty/natural and wounded in the limo ride, but if your true forever love is easily talked out of continuing your "relationship" then it wasn't what you thought it was to begin with. Jackie really had no second thoughts dispensing with Zach.  

 

And, as I began to suspect the preview of the handcuffs never came to fruition. Isn't there a law against that???

 

Lacy and Michelle had the same dress on; only Lacy was made up as a clown whore to distract us from noticing. 

 

  • Love 1
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It just seemed to me like Michelle was jealous that Graham was with any woman other than her.

 

Michelle has been known to slap cameras and lights if they aren't pointed at her at all times.  Her self-conscious 'help' for her friend Graham was nothing more than the female equivalent of c-blocking.  Her announcement that she had to talk to Graham was as unnecessary as it was intentionally meant to fluster AshLee.  On the other hand, AshLee wouldn't even fight her own corner - she should have demanded Michelle explain herself and her intentions.  I don't doubt that sensible Graham had some reservations but then so did AshLee. They are both on the older end of the scale for something like this and both were realistic and frank about the world beyond the BIP setup - they were as critical as they could be without being openly rebellious.

 

I still maintain it's madness for an AshLee, a Jackie or even a Sarah to be forced to rely on a reality show for access to potential mates but then an informed viewer knows that talent scouts, production assistants, agents, etc. are involved in casting, especially where Bachelor alumni are concerned.

  • Love 3
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Yet there was no update on Senator and Mrs. Bukowski. :(

 

 

They did give an update on them, they broke up after 2 weeks.  I didn't realize that's how long it takes for restraining order to take effect.

 

I hope someone takes poor Lacy aside and gently informs her that it's okay to wear make-up, just not ALL the make-up at the same time.  With all the colors she had going on (yellow eye shadow?  REALLY???), she immediately made me think of the woman who was recently arrested for stealing makeup and looked like this in her mug shot:

 

http://q13fox.com/2014/09/02/woman-accused-of-stealing-144-of-eye-shadow/

 

I'm happy for them, because I like for people to fall in love, but good lord are they ever the most boring people to walk the reality TV planet.  Even Sarah was more interesting than always-so-serious Marcus and baby-talk-smiley-clown Lacy.  On Andi's season, I found Marcus' looks to be absolutely breathtaking, and I do still think he is incredibly handsome, but were I in Lacy's position, I don't think I could stand all the constant love-intensity and lack of humor.  I would still take my jeans off in bed with him, sure, but the next morning I'd probably have to excuse myself.  Can't imagine spending my life with someone who doesn't make me laugh, but thankfully Lacy seems completely satisfied with what he has to offer her:  80% romance / 40% earnestness. Also, he pronounced imagine as "eye-magine", and she probably didn't even notice.  Match made in heaven.

 

Wasn't really prepared for Michelle to be so blunt about her initial concerns about Cody's package size, and then to show up the next morning honking horns and waving flags about how great the sex was.  Good for them and all, but ew.  I wonder if that's what Cody was talking about when he kept telling Andi that if she would just take the time to "get to know him", she would love him.

 

I, too, was disappointed that Ashlee didn't explode into a ball of fire and fury when Graham dumped her.  I don't really believe that she liked Michelle as much as she claimed - I think she was just being really careful what she said about her because she knew Graham cared so much about Michelle.  Wouldn't want to be on camera showing a true feeling, now, would you Ashlee?

  • Love 6
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I'm going with Sarah's version of what happened with Robert in the Fantasy Suite. Letting the world know the guy you were trying to seduce went to sleep with his pants on to protect himself from your advances is so totally humiliating that I can't imagine her making it up if it didn't happen.

  • Love 12
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I thought the finale was terribly boring, especially since 3 out of the 6 couples left in the first 10 minutes of the show. They should have done some kind of game or activity, anything would have been more interesting. Still can't figure Graham out all. He seems quiet and not a famewhore, he paid no attention to other girls, why was he on this show? 

For the second week in a row I have to defend Ashlee. I think what she said made perfect sense. She wanted to continue to get to know Graham and was confident in her feelings, but they didn't know each other well enough to discuss marriage. Of course, stir the pot Michelle had to ruin things. Did Michelle ever think that maybe Graham liked Ashlee and she should leave it alone? I have always had guy friends but notice that when a woman friend is always talking a guy out of seeing a girl, she usually is interested in the guy herself.

I feel sorry for Cody. He seems like a really nice guy (not my type at all), and I don't believe for a second Michelle will be content with him. Any woman who takes dating advice from a little girl is not looking for true love. I have no doubt Michelle will pop back up on some other show, leaving her daughter for weeks again. 

 

As for Marcus and Lacy; they both seem kind of immature to be married. Lacy seems sweet but the awful makeup she wears would be a huge distraction. I wonder if they paid Marcus to propose, he is only 25 and has just been in love with Andi. As for Sara, I did wonder why she didn't come right out and ask Robert why they didn't have sex. Why do some of these people talk around every subject? I didn't understand what she was really asking or what Robert was feeling. And he didn't have pants on when they went into the fantasy suite; I find it hard to believe he would put on pants when he was already in a robe.

Edited by Madding crowd
  • Love 1
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I loved the bit about "the raccoon is hoping Clare picks him!"

 

You know, maybe AshLee wasn't the right woman for Graham, but shouldn't that have been his decision to make, and not Michelle's?  I thought Michelle was out of line trying to break them up.   If AshLee and Graham had continued their relationship on their own, he probably would have come to realize soon enough that she wasn't the woman he thought she was in "paradise."  I don't know.  It just seemed to me like Michelle was jealous that Graham was with any woman other than her.

Graham has effectively said on Instagram that Michelle may be his friend, but his decision to break up was his and his alone.

 

Yet there was no update on Senator and Mrs. Bukowski. :(

Now I'm picturing AshLee standing outside the "resort" yelling "Nothing is over until I decide it is!"

 

As for Marcus and Lacy; they both seem kind of immature to be married. Lacy seems sweet but the awful makeup she wears would be a huge distraction. I wonder if they paid Marcus to propose, he is only 25 and has just been in love with Andi. As for Sara, I did wonder why she didn't come right out and ask Robert why they didn't have sex. Why do some of these people talk around every subject? I didn't understand what she was really asking or what Robert was feeling. And he didn't have pants on when they went into the fantasy suite; I find it hard to believe he would put on pants when he was already in a robe.

If it really played out like Sarah said it did, then yeah, Robert just wasn't that into her, or he wanted to go slower and her apparent aggressiveness may have frightened (or turned) him off.  But at the same time, you can't brush her off from undoing your pants in bed and then say the next morning, "I thought we were on the same page!"

 

And in the end, even Michelle got thrown under the editing bus, going from her talking with her daughter and point-blank telling Cody, "you know you're not getting laid tonight, right?" to her speculating on his package and then being "sore and satisfied".

 

Best wishes to Marcus and Lacy; I hope things go wonderfully for them.

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Cody seems like a good guy and I do like Michelle, but they DO NOT seem like a natural couple.  They are a vacation couple.  I doubt they would last a few days back in reality.

 

Per Reality Steve, months ago he posted in his spoilers that Michelle and Cody are still together.  It's one of those 'so weird but maybe so right' things? I think they were both looking to find love and sometimes it's just about timing.  More power to those crazy kids. 

Edited by LunaNegra
  • Love 4
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Ahhhh there was some real Trashelor gold tonight... Michelle was so gross being like "I can't figure out if I wanna be with Cody," and then all of a sudden the next morning being totally into him... Ew. Hope your 9 year old daughter enjoys watching her Mom talk about Cody's big dick on television. 

 

I found Sarah's freak out to be stupid! She said herself that she felt fine about the fantasy suite night until she heard about the other 2 dates. So basically she just started crying because her "relationship" wasn't the same as everyone else's? Shut up. I actually felt kind of bad for Robert. He chooses not to bang some girl he met 3 weeks ago on television, but then she hears her trashy friends talking about all the boning they got and freaks out about it?? SO sorry that you didn't get to fawn about being "sore" on TV, Sarah. 

 

Sarah going on about wanting Robert to really "dig deep" was hilarious though. 

 

I was actually pretty surprised at how well AshLee took getting dumped! I have to admit I was also kind of disappointed... I was expecting a full-scale freak out!

 

Also, SO glad we got an update on Raccoon!!! <3

Edited by wovenloaf
  • Love 3
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AWKWARD, Sarah is pissed she didn't get any. Robert is trying to act nonchalant while the others are practically bragging about their great sex.

 

(why isn't my post showing up? argh)

 

Sarah has, occasionally, been pretty darn observant (imo). I suspect once she heard that the other famewhore couples got down, the wheels started spinning in her head and she realized that Robert's physical intimacy was directly proportional to how many cameras were on him. It doesn't even sound like he felt her up or anything once the lights were out, she was basically like "wth dude, you talked for a bit and then rolled over and went to sleep." Considering Robert's initial gymnastics routine with Lacy, I do not take him for a guy who's wary of casual sex.

 

She probs made the right choice, and successfully denied Robert the "good looking guy with a heart of gold who was willing to date the disabled beauty" run at getting The Bachelor once he dumped her.

 

I dunno, I felt like MM's warning to Graham was morse code for AshLee will totally sell tawdry stories about you to TMZ if you dump her outside the house, bail while the cameras are still on her. I loved Michelle shutting it down if only because of AshLee's condescending/crowing declarations of worry about Michelle's relationship with Cody. Girl you are not slick. Good job, Cody, you figured out your position and played it well. She might even keep you on retainer for a few months.

 

Every makeup, hair, and fashion choice Lacy makes seems specifically designed to play to her worst advantage. I hope that's because of the on-set stylists, and not her own personal style. Maybe she and Marcus can swing a sponsored wedding and she can get a free makeunder, would do her a world of good.

 

I think my favorite moments were the end credits and Sarah's look of incredible boredom while AshLee prattled on and on.

Edited by rozen
  • Love 4
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Ahhhh there was some real Trashelor gold tonight... Michelle was so gross being like "I can't figure out if I wanna be with Cody," and then all of a sudden the next morning being totally into him... Ew. Hope your 9 year old daughter enjoys watching her Mom talk about Cody's big dick on television. 

 

I found Sarah's freak out to be stupid! She said herself that she felt fine about the fantasy suite night until she heard about the other 2 dates. So basically she just started crying because her "relationship" wasn't the same as everyone else's? Shut up. I actually felt kind of bad for Robert. He chooses not to bang some girl he met 3 weeks ago on television, but then she hears her trashy friends talking about all the boning they got and freaks out about it?? SO sorry that you didn't get to fawn about being "sore" on TV, Sarah. 

 

Sarah going on about wanting Robert to really "dig deep" was hilarious though. 

 

I was actually pretty surprised at how well AshLee took getting dumped! I have to admit I was also kind of disappointed... I was expecting a full-scale freak out!

 

Also, SO glad we got an update on Raccoon!!! <3

Sarah just showed me she's (1) not bright and (2) not nice. She was fine until she started comparing herself with the others. She didn't have to humiliate Robert on national television, but she never seems to think much of other people's point of view, she's always "wronged". Also, "not bright" because...hello? It's a television show and you barely know each other. If he's not that into you and you don't have sex, you both will look better ON TELEVISION if you seem happy and pleased with your time together the next morning.

 

C'mon, kids. You aren't new to all this. Don't give the editors so much to work with! You know they'll use it to make you look bad if they can. "Drama!" (As for Robert, if he was just "playing it up for the cameras" then he really should have stepped aside when Brooks showed up. That was kind of selfish, pretending he felt something when some other guy might have -really- felt it.)

Edited by Padma
  • Love 3
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"It was literally like having a gun to your head!" Oh, Michelle. Did anyone else think the girl on the phone sounded mature for a nine-year-old? On the Bachelorette we had Nick's ten-year-old sister looking blankly at Andi as she was talking about "emotional connections", and here a nine-year-old is supposedly giving her mother sage relationship advice?

 

Good job, Cody, you figured out your position and played it well.

 

 

Based on what Michelle was saying the morning after, there was more than one position involved.

 

Now that the show has been renewed, who wants to bet Michelle and Cody will be broken up by March so that Michelle can "look for love" on television again?

Edited by chocolatine
  • Love 8
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Does anyone know the whole story between Michelle & Graham? Assuming they dated (how long?), but it didn't work out? If so, who broke it off & why??

 

 

Michelle said when she first came in that she'd had "a beautiful relationship" with Graham and didn't know why it ended. I think Graham is a huge commitment-phobe, which is why he's single at 35. Nothing wrong with that per se, but if that's really the case then don't pretend otherwise on TV. I got the same vibe from Brad Womack as well, BTW, both times he was the Bachelor.

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Thanks, Chocolatine. After watching them together I'm convinced that Michelle still has deep feelings/love for Graham...and he seems to love and respect her/her opinion a great deal. A shame that he'd pass up a solid relationship due to being non-committal.

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Dear Producers, 

 

If you edit future seasons of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette like you edited the end of this crazy-ass show (the couple updates and credit bloopers), I will love you forever. 

 

Hugs and Roses,
OhIKnow

  • Love 11
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I think that those who weren't in 'love' when Chris told them to be honest may have been concerned that if they didn't follow his lead that would be it for them on t.v.  And, I do think that's the reason we keep seeing returnees of the franchise (right reason=being on t.v.).

 

I just couldn't with Sarah.  I think she's a real follower-wants what everyone else has.  The way Robert said to her 'but we talked about it...' seemed genuine to me.  Sarah just wants to be popular and sought after.  Remember, she was going to brake up with Robert...until she didn't.  She may have been the one to put the brakes on the fantasy suite-who knows?  I think she is putting her spin on it, and like was mentioned above, it's not her disability that prevents her from being in a relationship.

  • Love 4
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So are they going to trot out Marcus and Lacey now with the other "winner couples" every time it's the advice episode?

Oh, obviously. And we'll also be treated to their very special live! ABC-hosted wedding in the spring, see them get a live! ultrasound to figure out the sex of their new baby, and then there will be another live! TV special from inside the hospital where we will witness a Bachelor First as we get to watch their newborn baby (who has an 80/40 chance of being hot) get birthed.

  • Love 3
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I read somewhere that Lacey gave an interview saying she doesn't usually apply a lot of makeup and the girls in the house helped her out. Sure hope that is true!

 

I think this show was priceless! It gave us such good laughs and TPTB didn't take it all too serious. And it actually resulted in 2 cute couples. I wonder if they can ever recreate the success of this one. For me, this was perfect summertime entertainment!

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Come on now, Lacy, you can't blame the other women. You entered the show in a five ounce bikini and four pounds of make-up. I understood why the first morning when she was shown bare faced and looked like the raccoon might be her father. Marcus probably hasn't noticed and doesn't care. From his height he looks down at long eyelashes, modestly lowered over triple D implants, and just thinks about how kind she is. I'm happy for them though, they truly seem to be on the same page, reading at about fifth grade level.

Poor Robert was in a tough position from the minute Sarah zeroed in on him. Unless he wanted to be more reviled than Kalon and Jesse combined, he couldn't break up with her. Neither could he sleep with her unless he planned to propose the next day.

I couldn't help but notice the double standard with Michelle doing the very things she had attacked Jesse for last week. Talking about someone's physical attributes, bragging about positions and crudely talking about what was done in "every corner of the room," while they were alone. I think Cody seems sincere but I expect Michelle will be back next year licking her lips and pontificating for the camera.

Loved the "where are they now," ending. I'll be back next year.

  • Love 10
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Sarah came off as kind of a mean girl. I am glad she doesn't feel that because of her arm she needs to take second best. But instead her standards seem to be almost too high. I agree with Judy Obscure that Robert was in a tough spot, if he dumped her he looked like a heel and if he slept with her with no intention of a long term commitment he would also look bad.

 

Wonder how many people will watch Nikki and Juan Pablo in the Couples Therapy reality show? I have no interest or sympathy for those two and their relationship problems, so count me out.

  • Love 4
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Juan Pablo came off as arrogant and Nikki defiant to defend their relationship (IMHO) so I don't wish them well. I will admit to watching Married At First Sight, though annoying Jamie to me was not a jerk.

 

And back on topic, I doubt Marcus will get a tv wedding as he and Lacey came together on a 2nd tier show for the franchise.

  • Love 1
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I am SO upset about this goddamned football game! I keep mumbling to myself that this is the saddest day ever, and my family is just looking at me like I'm crazy.

You weren't alone, I was whining like a newborn puppy about the stupid football game, and there was no way I was staying up until 3am to watch this show. Figured I'd just watch it On Demand but they've got BP Part 2 and no BP Part 1.

So is my On Demand screwing with me or was the finale on for 2 hours?

Damn ABCDuh always finds a way to fuck me over television-wise.

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Sheesh, is it just me or was 60% of this episode Michelle talking to the camera? She's not that interesting. The sex with Cody must've been really good, since she went from lukewarm to totally in love overnight. And couldn't stop talking about it. I think even Lacy's ears were burning. I guess Marcus didn't totally disappoint either. Whatever happened to "it's something that is private and should be kept private" BTW, or does that only apply to the main show? Or would they have edited out the sex talk, if Nick hadn't broken the sacred code already?

 

Oh Sarah. I think she had every reason to be upset if things played out as she said. I totally get that not everyone wants to have sex on a TV show and take the risk of it being discussed on camera the next morning, but you'd think he'd at least explain that to her, if he cared about her. I too would expect him to at least want to talk, if no hanky panky is involved. It really seemed like he only had a mild interest in her and mostly while the cameras were rolling. After what he said to Brooks last week, I have trouble being sympathetic towards him. She does need to stop comparing her relationships to other peoples' though. It's very immature. She wasn't all that into him either just a couple of days ago, but now she is and he should be too, because that's how it should be at this point in the game? Every relationship is different, Sarah.

 

Well I'm happy for the two couples, even though Marcus still bores me to tears and sounds more depressed than earnest while talking about his feelings. I hope Lacy can handle a lifetime of serious romance. She really needs some makeup tips, because gravity will not be kind to her in the long run. There's only so long she can distract people from her face.

 

I also found it weird that the couples who broke up got like a minute of screentime and no exit interview. Aside from AshLee and Graham and that was disappointing too. I wanted to see a proper meltdown. I actually felt a bit bad for AshLee in the end, even though I find her fakeness totally vile.

 

The credits were the best part for sure.

  • Love 3
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I always kind of felt like Robert's and Graham's disinterested hanging-on-ness was based on wanting to be around for the end game. No one seemed to know what was waiting at the finish line, so maybe the plan was to just stick around in case it was something fabulous. (like a neeewww caaaaaaar!) As long as nothing better came along, it was give a rose, accept a rose. I think Graham was interested in playing the field/game on the first episode, but we know how that worked out. Loved how it seemed he was trying so hard to look devastated on the way out. mmv.

 

As for the phone call home for dating advice from a 9-year old, just all kinds of ick. And she did sound VERY mature for nine. 

 

If the editors can embrace the camp (and bring back Dr. Raccoon and some of his colleagues), then I'm in next time. Too boring just watching people whine, even on a beach, to watch again. Bring in something to shake things up - suggestion earlier to allow the newcomers to pick anyone, without knowing who is already coupled up, would be a start. Shoot, even a beach volleyball game would have been helpful.

  • Love 4
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