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S17.E03: The Labors of Life


Scarlett45
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Since they are not married, who's going to grant Kooty any custody at all?

Marriage is largely irrelevant to custody hearings. Kody just has to establish paternity (if he isn't already on the birth certificate).

I think that the whole "50/50 custody thing" is for dramatic/storyline purposes only. Kody doesn't really want it. Christine doesn't want it (she doesn't want to have 50/50 custody; I think she wants Truely with her). I doubt Truely even wants it. 

But the very last thing any of them wants is any sort of legal entity digging into their family life and their finances. No way Christine or Kody (especially Kody) will pursue this to a point of attorneys and judges getting involved. They will bicker among themselves, film it and Christine and Truely will get on with their lives.

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I sometimes *almost* feel a little sorry for Kadouche.  Imagine being jerked, seemingly overnight (because god knows he's incapable of picking up hints along the way that everything isn't just the way he wants it) from the middle of the 19th century into--what? the mid-1960s?  Christine might be burning her bra even as we speak.  No wonder it's taking him so long to begin to grasp his new reality--his paradigm shift, if you will.

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20 hours ago, Pooky said:

Kody does not want 50/50 custody of Truely he wants to throw a spanner in the works, and upset Christine. He can't stand that she is on cloud 9 and it's time to bring her down. 

Yep. Kody can only try things with Christine that he has tried and succeeded with in the past.  Emotional abuse techniques left and right. Trying (and failing) to sweet talk her, or forgetting the sweet talk until he thinks of it in a talking head. Dangle this in front of her, smoke and mirrors etc.

He's out of carrots, he's out of sticks. The only thing left is to try to hurt Christine as much as he can. Try to take away what she values most.

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On 9/27/2022 at 1:18 AM, b2H said:

And I continue to ask, from the previews, why does Kody pretend now to be concerned as to his future contact with his children with Christine, when they right now live around the corner and he can't be bothered to even stand outside a window and wave to them?

Because he’s completely lost control and desperately tries to get it back. It’s not about Truely, he just sees her as a means to an end. Basically, he’s telling Christine  if you’re really going to go through with this “divorce”, I’ll be the one who tells you what and how we’re going to do it (withTruely as  leverage)

He can no longer control Christine, has no legal rights to her house and assets. But he can exercise his parental rights. He’s evil enough to use that (or give it up) in negotiations about child support and maybe Coyote Pass. 

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8 hours ago, Pooky said:

The biggest thing from this whole episode for me was the fact that Mykelti was a nanny for Robyn before they wed. Why are we just hearing this now!? Its weird. What else don't we know??

Well we still don’t know “What Does The Nanny Do”!  Lol

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Kudos to the new parents - they're making it work. They seem genuinely in love (at least however many years ago this was filmed), and good for them. 

I'm a little confused by Meri's timeline. She kind of opened up the topic by saying her mother had been having a heart attack for several days. So my first impression was that she'd been in the hospital for that long and Meri was just heading up once they found out she was really failing.  Given the 5 hour drive, this seemed really peculiar. She has no minor children, she's self employed - how long do you leave YOUR mom in the hospital before you go to her?

However, then i thought maybe she meant that her mom probably delayed going into the hospital for what turned out to have been an ongoing heart attack over several days, one that was identified once she was seen and evaluated. But at the same time she kind of implied that they'd been working on her for a while. So I don't know.

But if she knew she was sick and didn't go up, that's worse to live with later than leaving as soon as you found out and not making it.

Somebody mentioned not being able to drive in that emotional state and implied that the fact she could was a sign of coldheartedness or something.  I don't think that's true. I learned my brother in law had been killed in a car accident while I was driving to work, that my sister and her kids were in a terrible wreck including being airlifted while I was driving home from a play late at night, and both times I had 4 hour drives to make to get to them. Just shut down and did it, because you have to. Sad, tearful, but perfectly safe to drive. I think some people's emotions get heightened in an emergency, and some of us just lock down and deal until there's space for emotion. I see Janelle more like me in that way, and Meri somewhere in the middle. Her mother really was quite young in the grand scheme of things so I'm sure she expected a lot more time with her.

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9 hours ago, TurtlePower said:

Typical of an emotional abuser. I was infuriated when he said this, and I’m sure he’s flabbergasted that Christine has not only succeeded on her own, but is flourishing.

Yep. See also: "No one will ever love you like I do."

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1 hour ago, Rabbit Hutch said:

The saddest part of this eppie is when Kootie stated that Christine wouldn't do any better than what she got from him presently.  Unbelievable.  I wanted to make my fist connect with his fat nose through the t.v.  🤨

Me too!  He thinks she's not worthy of love and devotion, which she is, and he never gave her that.  Shame on that asshole.  I'd never want to be around him if I were one of the adult kids.  Jackass.

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1 minute ago, Cetacean said:

I certainly hope not since he has been nothing of disdainful of her.  She'd get more love out of a pet poodle.

I'm positive it isn't true, but even if Christine never falls in love again, she'll be better off. Being "alone" (I know Christine has great friends and family) is better than being with someone who can't be bothered to hide his disdain.

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2 hours ago, kassa said:

how long do you leave YOUR mom in the hospital before you go to her?

With COVID the way it was at the time, it is highly likely that Meri wouldn’t have been allowed at the hospital anyway.  Protocols in health care facilities are the last ones to be relieved.  I don’t fault her.

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11 hours ago, Elizzikra said:

But the very last thing any of them wants is any sort of legal entity digging into their family life and their finances. No way Christine or Kody (especially Kody) will pursue this to a point of attorneys and judges getting involved. They will bicker among themselves, film it and Christine and Truely will get on with their lives.

A judge would want evidence that he has been a 50/50 father (financially & physically present) in the past. Robyn will vouch for Kootie always dividing his time equally. Judge would ask for evidence. Kootie's phone/GPS would probably show he spends less than 24 hrs/yr with her 24/8760 (<<<1% of his time with her).

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Just now, deirdra said:

A judge would want evidence that he has been a 50/50 father (financially & physically present) in the past. Robyn will vouch for Kootie always dividing his time equally. Judge would ask for evidence. Kootie's phone/GPS would probably show he spends less than 24 hrs/yr with her 24/8760 (<<<1% of his time with her).

I've never seen a family court judge subpoena GPS tracking records of someone's phone in an attempt to discover information about who is physically present with a child at any given time. Honestly, I think they just don't have the time for that level of scrutiny. I also don't think they need to see past evidence of 50/50 parenting to award shared custody, especially not when the past two years have been marked by COVID and many changes in multi-home family dynamics. It doesn't matter though, because I still maintain that no one "official" will ever get involved in any kind of custody discussion related to Truely. Neither Christine nor Kody want the type of scrutiny that they would get from judges, attorneys, GALs, mental health professionals or anyone else outside their existing circle. They definitely don't want anyone looking too closely at the family finances, particularly if Christine received, as some have alleged, TANF funds ("food stamps") fraudulently.

Kody may be angry and want to hurt Christine. He may even be smart enough to realize that trying to take Truely away from her, even part of the time, would be the best way to do it. But he doesn't want to actually parent Truely. He doesn't want Robyn's ire, so he doesn't want Robyn's nanny raising Truely either. And I think that, at the end of the day, he is too self-absorbed, unfocussed and most of all, lazy, to bother. Truely is going to be out of sight/out of mind for him. And she is probably better off for it.

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8 hours ago, Rabbit Hutch said:

The saddest part of this eppie is when Kootie stated that Christine wouldn't do any better than what she got from him presently.  Unbelievable.  I wanted to make my fist connect with his fat nose through the t.v.  🤨

7 hours ago, xwordfanatik said:

Me too!  He thinks she's not worthy of love and devotion, which she is, and he never gave her that.  Shame on that asshole.  I'd never want to be around him if I were one of the adult kids.  Jackass.

I don't think it's about Christine not being worthy of anything. Rather, it has everything to do with his hugely inflated ego and God-like perception. In his mind he is so absolutely wonderful, dedicated, caring and perfect, that there's simply no way anyone is able to top that.  It also explains his cruel and  ridiculous attacks on Christine. It's his perception and since he is so perfect, it has to be Christine who is at fault and has to take the blame for everything. Kody is just incapable of seeing it differently and it shows how twisted his mind really is.

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13 hours ago, b2H said:

With COVID the way it was at the time, it is highly likely that Meri wouldn’t have been allowed at the hospital anyway.  Protocols in health care facilities are the last ones to be relieved.  I don’t fault her.

You are absolutely correct. I forgot about the timeline - they're still in 2020?  Took an uncle to the hospital and was told that if I entered the building with him I'd be the ONLY person permitted to see him for as long as he was there, two hours or two months. They really locked down. I think by fall it was one visitor at a time and max of 2 in a day. 

Meri's sister might very well have had things in hand for what they anticipated would be a day or two of tests. 

That adds a whole additional layer to the grief - gathering together was so fraught - had two funerals in Nov 2020 and there were no wakes, everybody socially distanced graveside, etc etc. Nothing normal about it. 

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Kody is unhinged to the point where I thought he was trolling the viewers by overplaying the villain but no...he's really that much of a narcissist.

Meri should have been out a long time ago but this should seal it, no further discussion. When Kody convened the Zoom call and he said hello to his other wives and added "oh, and hi Meri" I was dumbfounded why she stays around. Then her mom... I had the same experience in February when I got the call in the morning that my mom was not going to make it (sepsis/intestinal perforation), I jumped in the car to drive the 9 hours to her house. I was so sure I would make it to say goodbye and I got the call when I was about 3 hours away. I've never known a pain like that. To be so close to giving comfort in your loved one's final moments and missing it. I, too, was driving alone bc my partner was away for work. I can't believe Meri was able to talk to the cameras after that call. 

That personal note aside, she WANTED him to go with her. She needed support. He is a joke. He thinks his "marriage(s)" will get him into heaven? If there is one I hope God does a long, long replay of what a garbage human being Kody was to his wives and his children. 

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I've never seen a family court judge subpoena GPS tracking records of someone's phone in an attempt to discover information about who is physically present with a child at any given time. Honestly, I think they just don't have the time for that level of scrutiny. I also don't think they need to see past evidence of 50/50 parenting to award shared custody, especially not when the past two years have been marked by COVID and many changes in multi-home family dynamics. It doesn't matter though, because I still maintain that no one "official" will ever get involved in any kind of custody discussion related to Truely. Neither Christine nor Kody want the type of scrutiny that they would get from judges, attorneys, GALs, mental health professionals or anyone else outside their existing circle. They definitely don't want anyone looking too closely at the family finances, particularly if Christine received, as some have alleged, TANF funds ("food stamps") fraudulently.

I have had several friends and family members get divorced and deal with child custody, and from what I have seen, Kody could easily keep Truely in Flagstaff. There is tons of evidence that he is the biological father, and unless Christine can prove he is a felon or a crackhead, she's not taking Truely out of the state if Kody gets a lawyer and fights it. I know someone who can't move her kids out of the school district they are in. Not being a hands-on father is not going to get Christine permission to move Truely out of state. The real question is will Kody fight the move like a decent father who wants to see his kid would, or will Kody just play the victim, get no lawyer, and let them leave and then whine about it? 

Kody is dead wrong that the courts go against fathers in these situations. It's actually mostly the opposite, from my experience. But if he goes to court, he will likely be on the hook for child support. And I suspect that is the real reason he won't go to court. That, and he doesn't really want to be responsible for Truely 50% of the time. 

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1 hour ago, Kellyee said:

The real question is will Kody fight the move like a decent father who wants to see his kid would, or will Kody just play the victim, get no lawyer, and let them leave and then whine about it? 

The second…. Being the victim. He has no intention to look after Truely. Besides, a lawyer costs money which he doesn’t have (I think) or he’d much rather spend the huge fee on something else (like Robyn or guns) that is more important to him.

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On 9/26/2022 at 1:08 PM, Claire Voyant said:

IMO, she needs to get a heck of a lot meaner and keep what's hers.  I read somewhere she gave up her house to him.  Doesn't sound mean enough to me.  I hope he had to pay her SOMETHING if that's true.  

I agree! This comment made me wonder if the children have been getting paid from TLC for their participation and sister wives? I certainly hope they each have a trust fund set aside because it wasn't as though they had a choice not to participate.

3 hours ago, Kellyee said:

I have had several friends and family members get divorced and deal with child custody, and from what I have seen, Kody could easily keep Truely in Flagstaff. There is tons of evidence that he is the biological father, and unless Christine can prove he is a felon or a crackhead, she's not taking Truely out of the state if Kody gets a lawyer and fights it.

Kody doesn't stand a chance in court. They were never legally married, and haven't lived as man and wife for over 12 years. Or however soon it was that Robin entered the picture. Any Court would view this man with so many children he can't see them all, that they would never demand that she stay in the state for a visit once or twice a month. Christine has too much evidence of him being an absent father. Plus she has no problem with kody seeing truley, so long as he pays for the trips back and forth.

Edited by Chalby
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3 hours ago, Lambie said:

Kody is unhinged to the point where I thought he was trolling the viewers by overplaying the villain but no...he's really that much of a narcissist.

Meri should have been out a long time ago but this should seal it, no further discussion. When Kody convened the Zoom call and he said hello to his other wives and added "oh, and hi Meri" I was dumbfounded why she stays around. Then her mom... I had the same experience in February when I got the call in the morning that my mom was not going to make it (sepsis/intestinal perforation), I jumped in the car to drive the 9 hours to her house. I was so sure I would make it to say goodbye and I got the call when I was about 3 hours away. I've never known a pain like that. To be so close to giving comfort in your loved one's final moments and missing it. I, too, was driving alone bc my partner was away for work. I can't believe Meri was able to talk to the cameras after that call. 

That personal note aside, she WANTED him to go with her. She needed support. He is a joke. He thinks his "marriage(s)" will get him into heaven? If there is one I hope God does a long, long replay of what a garbage human being Kody was to his wives and his children. 

Agreed!

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15 hours ago, LilyD said:

I don't think it's about Christine not being worthy of anything. Rather, it has everything to do with his hugely inflated ego and God-like perception. In his mind he is so absolutely wonderful, dedicated, caring and perfect, that there's simply no way anyone is able to top that.  It also explains his cruel and  ridiculous attacks on Christine. It's his perception and since he is so perfect, it has to be Christine who is at fault and has to take the blame for everything. Kody is just incapable of seeing it differently and it shows how twisted his mind really is.

I predict that Christine is going to meet a wonderful, good looking, family man who(m?) she will eventually marry. Given this will be her first legal and "real" marriage, she will double down on her commitment and the rest of her life is going to be with a man who truly appreciates her.

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16 minutes ago, Chalby said:

Plus she has no problem with kody seeing truley, so long as he pays for the trips back and forth.

Did she say this?

17 minutes ago, Chalby said:

Kody doesn't stand a chance in court. They were never legally married, and haven't lived as man and wife for over 12 years.

Not that I think they will actually go to court , but he would stand a chance. Establish paternity and there you have it.

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3 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

Did she say this?

Not that I think they will actually go to court , but he would stand a chance. Establish paternity and there you have it.

My response isn't in response to paternity. I am saying he cannot stop Christine from moving to another state. As well, Christine has always been accommodating when Kody wants to see his kids. If he showed up to wherever she lives, she would not refuse him access to truley. Any Court would not allow him to stop the move based on pettiness.

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1 minute ago, Chalby said:

My response isn't in response to paternity. I am saying he cannot stop Christine from moving to another state. As well, Christine has always been accommodating when Kody wants to see his kids. If he showed up to wherever she lives, she would not refuse him access to truley. Any Court would not allow him to stop the move based on pettiness.

What I was asking was, did she say this, “Plus she has no problem with kody seeing truley, so long as he pays for the trips back and forth.”.

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On 9/28/2022 at 8:24 AM, magemaud said:

Actually “Mykelti” is at the top of my list of dumb Kody offspring names. Now that’s a name you’ll never find on the  key ring rack in a souvenir shop. 

I have to agree with you, Christine picked out some odd names for her kids.

3 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

What I was asking was, did she say this, “Plus she has no problem with kody seeing truley, so long as he pays for the trips back and forth.”.

No Christine has never said that kody has to pay for the visits. (That is my suggestion). As for the kids, Christine has always stated that kody has amazing potential as a father if he would just step it up more. She has never condemned his actual interactions with the kids and encourages it. Lastly, she stated that truley is always excited to see her father, and I cannot see Christine stopping this.

Edited by Chalby
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On 9/28/2022 at 6:59 AM, Pooky said:

The biggest thing from this whole episode for me was the fact that Mykelti was a nanny for Robyn before they wed. Why are we just hearing this now!? Its weird. What else don't we know??

What does the nanny DO? Maybe Mykelti can clue Christine in?

Edit: beaten, should've read the rest of the thread before commenting!

Edited by monagatuna
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On 9/28/2022 at 5:11 PM, magemaud said:

Or "What does Robyn Do"! Oh wait, Robyn does Kody. 

I think Robyn spends an inordinate amount if time doing her nails, curling and aqua netting her hair. Then make-up. I suspect she spends a lot of time trolling FB and Reddit groups. 

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I can't see Kootie taking a custody fight to court for reasons mentioned above.  Also, before TLC came along, Christine had to file for bankruptcy and go on food stamps since Kootie wasn't providing for his children. She mentioned that in the applications she said she lived "with friends", not her "husband" or "the children's father" so the law would not go after her wonderful man.  The courts don't look kindly on cult members out to bleed the beast (taxpayers).  The result might be that Kootie would get some visitation, not 50/50, and a court order to pay Christine child-support. A social worker would also have to visit the tchotchke hoarder's house; is it also full of guns now that Christine has moved him out? We know Kootie doesn't like the government in his business, but the welfare of Truely would be the key focus.

Edited by deirdra
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4 hours ago, Chalby said:

As for the kids, Christine has always stated that kody has amazing potential as a father if he would just step it up more.

Kody would have amazing potential as a father if he actually acted like a father.

He is such a cretin.

Edited by the-grey-lady
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The real question is will Kody fight the move like a decent father who wants to see his kid would, or will Kody just play the victim, get no lawyer, and let them leave and then whine about it? 

I actually think the decent father move here is for Kody to let Truely go to Utah with Christine unchallenged BUT to visit her regularly and FaceTime her daily. That would provide the smoothest transition for her and allow her to have a happy mother and be surrounded by loving family.

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A social worker would also have to visit the tchotchke hoarder's house; is it also full of guns now that Christine has moved him out?

I did home studies for adoptive families for years and guns in the home... probably don't matter. It varies state by state. Some states (Florida, for one) prohibit social workers from even asking about them. The state I worked in allowed us to ask if the family had guns, to ask to see where they were stored and maintained and to assess whether or not the children had access to them. My guess is that Arizona probably leans toward the "you can't ask" end of that spectrum. 

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5 hours ago, Art Of Noiz said:

I think Robyn spends an inordinate amount if time doing her nails, curling and aqua netting her hair. Then make-up. I suspect she spends a lot of time trolling FB and Reddit groups. 

especially her eyebrow regimen! 

I wish she would troll this forum! 

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42 minutes ago, Art Of Noiz said:

I wish she would, too! Robyn? If you're reading, just come out..post.. We'll listen...

Yes, tell us what you REALLY think about Kody and your sisterwives! We don't judge here...

Edited by magemaud
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On 9/28/2022 at 6:15 PM, kassa said:

I'm a little confused by Meri's timeline. She kind of opened up the topic by saying her mother had been having a heart attack for several days. So my first impression was that she'd been in the hospital for that long and Meri was just heading up once they found out she was really failing.  Given the 5 hour drive, this seemed really peculiar. She has no minor children, she's self employed - how long do you leave YOUR mom in the hospital before you go to her?

However, then i thought maybe she meant that her mom probably delayed going into the hospital for what turned out to have been an ongoing heart attack over several days, one that was identified once she was seen and evaluated. But at the same time she kind of implied that they'd been working on her for a while. So I don't know.

But if she knew she was sick and didn't go up, that's worse to live with later than leaving as soon as you found out and not making it.

My interpretation of what happened with Meri's mother was that she had been feeling unwell for a week or so, then she felt so poorly that she went to the hospital.  Most likely the family member downplayed it with Meri and she didn't consider it an immediate emergency.  When it became an emergency after the two days, then it was clear that her mother was having/had a heart attack and Meri needed to head out. Meri mentioned "coding and being worked on", so that was probably what happened suddenly in the hospital that had her now rushing to drive.

It may not have been Meri who put off going, but who ever told her didn't make it seem as bad as it was. Or simply it didn't appear as bad until it was very bad.

To quote my mother's very odd phrase... "You never know when you are going to be hit with a bus of nuns."

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6 hours ago, Roslyn said:

My interpretation of what happened with Meri's mother was that she had been feeling unwell for a week or so, then she felt so poorly that she went to the hospital.  Most likely the family member downplayed it with Meri and she didn't consider it an immediate emergency.  When it became an emergency after the two days, then it was clear that her mother was having/had a heart attack and Meri needed to head out. Meri mentioned "coding and being worked on", so that was probably what happened suddenly in the hospital that had her now rushing to drive.

It may not have been Meri who put off going, but who ever told her didn't make it seem as bad as it was. Or simply it didn't appear as bad until it was very bad.

To quote my mother's very odd phrase... "You never know when you are going to be hit with a bus of nuns."

Ok, I used the laugh emoji for the last line only. I hope I can remember and use it when appropriate. 

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My weekend treat! Kody continues to be the biggest asshole. Ysabel is a high school senior, of course she wants to be with her friends. What I don't get- Kody could visit safely - both could mask. It's total bs, he is coming over because he doesn't want to.

And I think Christine is amazing and totally honest about being happy that Robyn is close to Mykelti. I've stated it before, Christine believed more than anyone in plural marriage, she saw the benefits for the children. 

Christine is glowing after dumping Kody, good for her.

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On 9/30/2022 at 12:27 AM, Chalby said:

I have to agree with you, Christine picked out some odd names for her kids.

Did the mothers decide on the names and did Kody have a say in this? Am curious to find out how names were decided and by whom.

Christine definitely didn’t pick standard names. And then she had to add that awful spelling too. What was she thinking? Those kids will be spelling their first name for the rest of their lives!

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