S19.E08: Men Tell All

[dizzyd]

16 minutes ago, Melonie77 said:

Here is a link to the missing rose ceremony that followed the hometown dates:

I didn’t understand, where are they going next?

[Melonie77]

I posted this info pasted below in the media thread but thought I'd put it here too to help spread the word that there are two consecutive episodes next week on Monday and Tuesday....

Well it looks like ABC has at least decided to allow for a bit more time to the ending of this season's storylines. I believe we are getting one additional episode.

I just read on Reality Steve's site that the original schedule posted for the last few episodes has been updated. There will be two consecutive nights for the overnights plus 2 Tuesday nights for the finale and ATFR.

Quote from RS:

-------"a clarification regarding a schedule change. Last week, Bustle had reported (which I quoted), that the rest of the season would play out with Part 1 of overnights next Monday the 5th, Part 2 of overnights the following Tuesday the 13th, then the finale and ATFR on Tuesday, the 20th. Well according to the Bachelorette IG account that posted the missing rose ceremony yesterday, next week will have the two overnight episodes back-to-back on Mon & Tues the 5th & 6th. The Finale will be spread out over the following two Tuesdays, the 13th 20th."

[Melonie77]

11 minutes ago, dizzyd said:

I didn’t understand, where are they going next?

@dizzyd

The girls' announcement was muffled and I couldn't understand either but I know from spoilers that they are going to Mexico for the fantasy suites/finale dates episodes. They stated the name of the town but I could not make that out at all.🤣

I guess they must have returned to the Bachelor Mansion after hometowns?

The producers this season are really making us piece together the narrative on our own, aren't they?!🙃

They were generous with the locations and the cruise ship setting, and then didn't follow through with a cohesive storyline!

[nlkm9]

On 8/29/2022 at 9:15 PM, rlc said:

Roby the magician has a famous sister.

oh saw her in jungle to jungle--such a sweet loooking girl. 

[Kiss my mutt]

Nate talks a good talk, but he comes across too polished and rehearsed. He hits all the right notes. 

[deSchenke]

5 hours ago, Melonie77 said:

@dizzyd

The girls' announcement was muffled and I couldn't understand either but I know from spoilers that they are going to Mexico for the fantasy suites/finale dates episodes. They stated the name of the town but I could not make that out at all.🤣

I think it is Sayulita Nayarit, the same place BiP is filmed.

[Melonie77]

15 hours ago, Kiss my mutt said:

Nate talks a good talk, but he comes across too polished and rehearsed. He hits all the right notes. 

He's a polished love-bomber.🤣
Some of the excuses he made on MTA were the same excuses his bachelor nation friends Pilot Pete and Dustin made for him on their podcast.
Reality Steve is now reporting that Nate's friends Pete and Dustin got such a huge amount of negative feedback for calling Nate's ex girlfriends "party girls" and saying Nate felt the one girl was not worthy of knowing he had a child, that they have closed down their pod cast.

Edited September 1, 2022 by Melonie77

[Starlight925]

12 hours ago, Melonie77 said:

He's a polished love-bomber.🤣
Some of the excuses he made on MTA were the same excuses his bachelor nation friends Pilot Pete and Dustin made for him on their podcast.
Reality Steve is now reporting that Nate's friends Pete and Dustin got such a huge amount of negative feedback for calling Nate's ex girlfriends "party girls" and saying Nate felt the one girl was not worthy of knowing he had a child, that they have closed down their pod cast.

Interesting.

A man is judged by the company he keeps....

Pilot Pete was one of the worst wolves-in-sheep's clothing the franchise has ever had.  
Nate is a close second.

To date someone for 1 1/2 years but to say she's not "worthy" of knowing he has a child, well that says more about Nate than it does about the girl.

Edited September 1, 2022 by Starlight925

[Melonie77]

2 hours ago, Starlight925 said:

Pilot Pete was one of the worst wolves-in-sheep's clothing the franchise has ever had.  
Nate is a close second.
To date someone for 1 1/2 years but to say she's not "worthy" of knowing he has a child, well that says more about Nate than it does about the girl.

This also doesn't make any sense - why wasn't it supposedly ok to tell this one girl he had a daughter yet it was alright to go on the bachelorette show and tell the world?

There have been numerous times that the producers did not investigate cast members well enough and negative info came to light after the person was already involved w/ the lead in the show.

I don't know how other people feel who watch reality shows but I'm tired of cast members' poor behavior being rewarded, highlighted or at the very least overlooked on these shows.

Edited September 1, 2022 by Melonie77

[debbie311]

How would you even date someone for a year and a half and keep that information from them? I mean, things are going to come up with the child, you have to take them here or there, they get sick, just the normal parts of having a child. Even if he didn't have custody of the child.  (Did he?  I don't recall hearing that.)  I could understand if you only dated someone a couple of times. But a year and a half?!

To not tell the person you are dating that you have a child is just flat out lying.

[Kiss my mutt]

How can a child be the center of your world and kept a secret?

[DEL901]

And a child is something you bring up on date one, if not before you start dating so neither of you waste your time if the other person doesn’t want to get involved with a parent.   As others have mentioned, this is totally separate from introducing dates to your child until you know it is going somewhere.  

[Hip-to-be-Square]

I vote for Roby Sobieski as the next Bachelor- he's a hot magician and looks even hotter with his original brunette hair color.   Tyler is absolutely adorable, but I'd feel like he'd look younger than most of the women his age.  Another option for The Bachelor would be David Spade- take me now, David!  😅

[StatisticalOutlier]

21 hours ago, Starlight925 said:

On 9/1/2022 at 1:28 AM, Melonie77 said:

Reality Steve is now reporting that Nate's friends Pete and Dustin got such a huge amount of negative feedback for calling Nate's ex girlfriends "party girls" and saying Nate felt the one girl was not worthy of knowing he had a child, that they have closed down their pod cast.

To date someone for 1 1/2 years but to say she's not "worthy" of knowing he has a child, well that says more about Nate than it does about the girl.

For clarity--according to what you quoted, Nate isn't the one who said it.  His friends said Nate felt that way.  Who knows how Nate actually put it, if he put it any way at all.  Maybe they were just inferring that Nate felt she wasn't worthy based on the fact that he hadn't told her. 

And actually, it wasn't clear--are Pete and Dustin from the Bachelor Nation, and not actual friends of Nate's?  If so, they weren't even around when Nate was dating this girl.  It makes me even more curious how they know how Nate "felt" when he was not telling her about his daughter.

Frankly, I don't think we know much of anything.  It appears that he had a relationship with this girl for a year and a half and didn't tell her he had a kid.  We don't know  the particulars of the relationship, which would be helpful because as many of us have said, how in the world do you keep a child's existence a secret from someone you dated for a year and a half? 

The wild card in that is "dated."  We each have our own understanding of what "dating" means, which we're presumably imposing on this situation.  But we don't know what Nate's and this girl's individual understanding of the relationship was.  It still appears to me that they weren't on the same page. 

[JenE4]

Unless I’m misremembering, I thought this girl—along with the other girl she exposed as dating Nate—were both long-distance to him. I thought they met on Tinder when he happened to be in town, and he later flew in to see her on the other occasions she listed. This is how he could keep the secret of his kid, because this women was not in his day-to-day life. If she’s long-distance, then that could totally explain why they had differing views on what that meant and why it might not be a big deal for him to date other people—especially since it doesn’t seem like it was serious enough for her to ever fly to him, and why she didn’t know anything about his actual life. She only knew “vacation mode Nate.”

[LuvMyShows]

On 8/31/2022 at 11:52 PM, deSchenke said:

I think it is Sayulita Nayarit, the same place BiP is filmed.

They said Riviera Maya.  

On 8/31/2022 at 3:00 PM, Starlight925 said:

I adore Zach!  But I believe Zach was the one who told his mom he really wasn't ready for all this.  The other 3 that I mentioned seem to really want this.

I thought Zach was one of the first to be all-in.  The only 2 I remember expressing those doubts were for Gabby, and it was Johnny and Jason.

[nlkm9]

3 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

For clarity--according to what you quoted, Nate isn't the one who said it.  His friends said Nate felt that way.  Who knows how Nate actually put it, if he put it any way at all.  Maybe they were just inferring that Nate felt she wasn't worthy based on the fact that he hadn't told her. 

And actually, it wasn't clear--are Pete and Dustin from the Bachelor Nation, and not actual friends of Nate's?  If so, they weren't even around when Nate was dating this girl.  It makes me even more curious how they know how Nate "felt" when he was not telling her about his daughter.

Frankly, I don't think we know much of anything.  It appears that he had a relationship with this girl for a year and a half and didn't tell her he had a kid.  We don't know  the particulars of the relationship, which would be helpful because as many of us have said, how in the world do you keep a child's existence a secret from someone you dated for a year and a half? 

The wild card in that is "dated."  We each have our own understanding of what "dating" means, which we're presumably imposing on this situation.  But we don't know what Nate's and this girl's individual understanding of the relationship was.  It still appears to me that they weren't on the same page. 

<<he wild card in that is "dated."  We each have our own understanding of what "dating" means, which we're presumably imposing on this situation.  But we don't know what Nate's and this girl's individual understanding of the relationship was.  It still appears to me that they weren't on the same page. >>

everyone is so quick to pile on this guy and noone has a word to say about this girl who "supposedly" dated him for a year and a half. I think it was casual dating and long distance and I have to question where her head was at.

it takes 2 to tango. with that being said, I dont like him for bachelor, I really hate his hair. I LOVE Aven and Zach. I still wish we could have had Rodney.

19 hours ago, Kiss my mutt said:

How can a child be the center of your world and kept a secret?

if you are casually dating someone you only see once in a while,or who you dont see a future with, I take no issue with it. not everyone wants to disclose these things. I will say, back in grad school, I went on a date (living in same town) and his first thing he said to me is "I have 2 daughters". But this was many years ago when divorce was so uncommon and we lived very close to each other. I have to beleive if nate had strong feelings for someone, that someone was the one who he shared that with. I still havent seen both sides of this story....

[ljenkins782]

On 8/29/2022 at 9:57 PM, GracieK said:

Jacob definitely was given a master class in apologies imo.  He took full accountability, apologized for what he did wrong, didn't make excuses or deflect, and vowed to do better in the future. 

I feel like he took a class in Instagram speak and it came across so hollow and rehearsed. He had advance notice that he looked bad, so he spent the last month or so researching how to rehab his image.

Quote

Eh, I never liked Nate and his stupid lopsided asymmetrical 'do. 

Love-bombing.  Saying all the right things.  Being the "very best guy".  Something just so disingenuous about him.

If you have to keep mentioning your daughter, how she's your world, over & over again, something is off.

Nate's Kid N' Play hairdo was the only thing that bothered me about him in terms of what we saw of him on the season. The stuff that's come out later definitely casts doubt on his sincerity, but in a world of Tinder dating, sliding into people's DMs, etc, he's hardly unusual. Sadly, that seems to be the state of world when it comes to dating, it's a numbers game for too many people and the constant resupplying of the pool of available people via dating apps has led to this very superficial level of "getting to know" someone. 

So if he was carrying on a casual, see you when I see you long distance thing with this girl, the fact that his daughter never came up makes some sense. It just depends on much talking they did in between those hookups whether it seems disingenuous on his part.

Quote

Roby the magician has a famous sister. [LeeLee Sobieski]

Ha, I can totally see a resemblance around the eyes. But Roby did not acquit himself well on this MTA. There's always that one "I was in the house for 5 minutes so I need to make up my screen time now" first night boot who talks too much on this kind of episode, but he was creeping me out in a whole different way. I completely got why he was singled out (with the prepubescent twins) for immediate dispatch in the first episode. 

I thought Gabby came across the best in this last episode, she was funny and personable and firm with anyone who tried to come at her. I like her and Jesse together (not as a couple, but just interacting), her making fun of his flubbed line was one of the best bloopers. 

Can't bring myself to care about the outcome of any of these relationships, none of them seem terribly genuine or heartfelt. I did LOL at Rachel earnestly explaining how much an engagement meant to her, that she only wanted to be engaged once, etc. Is she counting that moment last season where she was stumbling around wondering if she "won" by default because Susie and Gabby had walked away. That would have been engagement #1 if those 2 hadn't come back (however briefly), right? She showed no signs of leaving until she was officially dumped.

[nlkm9]

1 hour ago, ljenkins782 said:

I feel like he took a class in Instagram speak and it came across so hollow and rehearsed. He had advance notice that he looked bad, so he spent the last month or so researching how to rehab his image.

Nate's Kid N' Play hairdo was the only thing that bothered me about him in terms of what we saw of him on the season. The stuff that's come out later definitely casts doubt on his sincerity, but in a world of Tinder dating, sliding into people's DMs, etc, he's hardly unusual. Sadly, that seems to be the state of world when it comes to dating, it's a numbers game for too many people and the constant resupplying of the pool of available people via dating apps has led to this very superficial level of "getting to know" someone. 

So if he was carrying on a casual, see you when I see you long distance thing with this girl, the fact that his daughter never came up makes some sense. It just depends on much talking they did in between those hookups whether it seems disingenuous on his part.

Ha, I can totally see a resemblance around the eyes. But Roby did not acquit himself well on this MTA. There's always that one "I was in the house for 5 minutes so I need to make up my screen time now" first night boot who talks too much on this kind of episode, but he was creeping me out in a whole different way. I completely got why he was singled out (with the prepubescent twins) for immediate dispatch in the first episode. 

I thought Gabby came across the best in this last episode, she was funny and personable and firm with anyone who tried to come at her. I like her and Jesse together (not as a couple, but just interacting), her making fun of his flubbed line was one of the best bloopers. 

Can't bring myself to care about the outcome of any of these relationships, none of them seem terribly genuine or heartfelt. I did LOL at Rachel earnestly explaining how much an engagement meant to her, that she only wanted to be engaged once, etc. Is she counting that moment last season where she was stumbling around wondering if she "won" by default because Susie and Gabby had walked away. That would have been engagement #1 if those 2 hadn't come back (however briefly), right? She showed no signs of leaving until she was officially dumped.

oh yeah that was sad. sometimes I wonder, how are these girls not totally embarassed that all these guys and millions others saw them being "intimate " with clayton and both getting dumped. Youre right, Rachel was not leaving until she was dumped. it was super sad to see. Ill never get used to how public things are these days. (like pilot petes family egging him on)

[DEL901]

Rather than Kid n Play, Nate’s hair reminds me of a certain villain in Black panther played by Michael B Jordan.  

[Melonie77]

8 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

For clarity--according to what you quoted, Nate isn't the one who said it.  His friends said Nate felt that way.  Who knows how Nate actually put it, if he put it any way at all.  Maybe they were just inferring that Nate felt she wasn't worthy based on the fact that he hadn't told her. 

And actually, it wasn't clear--are Pete and Dustin from the Bachelor Nation, and not actual friends of Nate's?  If so, they weren't even around when Nate was dating this girl.  It makes me even more curious how they know how Nate "felt" when he was not telling her about his daughter. 

Yes, Nate's friends Peter Weber and Dustin Kendrick were the ones who said negative things about Nate's ex girlfriends on their Bachelor themed podcast.

---To be clear, when I said that his friends were from "bachelor-nation" I meant ex-cast members not fans. Both Pete Weber and Dustin Kendrick were on Hannah Brown's season together and Peter was the lead in his own season of the Bachelor.

---And yes, they are actual friends of Nate's. Dustin claims to have known Nate since he was 14 or 15 years old. Peter got to know him through Dustin and said he has known Nate for about a year and a half. They have gone away on trips together.

---Nate is from Chicago. During the early days of the pandemic Peter and Dustin isolated / lived together with ex-bachelorette Kelley Flanigan in her Chicago apartment. Nate dated the two girls at the same time during this same time period 2020 - 2021 (Kelsey and Laree).
Kelsey lives in Chicago - her relationship was NOT long distance. Dustin was aware of Nate's relationship with her while it was happening and admits to asking him why he was spending so much time with her. Dustin claims she was a "party girl" and then says on his podcast "Nate knew this was not the type of girl to introduce to his daughter". This is obviously the opinion of the friends, I do not think it's too much of a stretch to think Nate was of the same opinion. They are telling us this was their friend's opinion. The podcast segment was very misogynist as they tried to shame and blame the women. I didn't think there was much wrong in what Kelsey did other than to be naive. Peter and Dustin's 'Nate discussion' on their podcast triggered a big backlash including a woman who had been sexually assaulted confronting them . They have since shuttered their podcast.

7 hours ago, JenE4 said:

Unless I’m misremembering, I thought this girl—along with the other girl she exposed as dating Nate—were both long-distance to him. I thought they met on Tinder when he happened to be in town, and he later flew in to see her on the other occasions she listed. This is how he could keep the secret of his kid, because this women was not in his day-to-day life. 

You are remembering wrong. Only ONE of the 2 girls was long-distance and that was the less significant relationship. As stated above both Nate and Kelsey are from Chicago. Kelsey is the one he dated for 18 months.
The second girl Laree lives out of state. He met her on Tinder and dated her for a couple of months during the same time he was with Kelsey. The funny thing is that he DID tell the short term woman Laree about the child.
Also, Kelsey did not 'expose' the other girl. They both agreed to reveal their information to Steve individually. He spoke with both of them quite a bit and they each supplied documentation to back up their stories. 

4 hours ago, ljenkins782 said:

Nate's Kid N' Play hairdo was the only thing that bothered me about him in terms of what we saw of him on the season. The stuff that's come out later definitely casts doubt on his sincerity, but in a world of Tinder dating, sliding into people's DMs, etc, he's hardly unusual. Sadly, that seems to be the state of world when it comes to dating, it's a numbers game for too many people and the constant resupplying of the pool of available people via dating apps has led to this very superficial level of "getting to know" someone. 

So if he was carrying on a casual, see you when I see you long distance thing with this girl, the fact that his daughter never came up makes some sense. It just depends on much talking they did in between those hookups whether it seems disingenuous on his part.

See the info in my responses above...
There were 2 girlfriends:
-Both Kelsey and Nate live in Chicago and dated for 18 months. It was NOT a long distance relationship. They met at a Chicago night club. They saw each other for holidays, birthdays and went away on vacation with each other. After a few months, she thought they were exclusive.
His divorce was not even finalized until almost a year after he started seeing her and yet he never told her he had been married nor that he had a child.
-Laree was a long distance relationship. They met on Tinder and he saw her for a couple of months behind Kelsey's back.
He told both women that he loved them.
🙃🙃🙃

Edited September 3, 2022 by Melonie77

[Melonie77]

44 minutes ago, DEL901 said:

Rather than Kid n Play, Nate’s hair reminds me of a certain villain in Black panther played by Michael B Jordan.  

Nate's hair is just awful! I can't get past it yet he seems to attract a lot of women! His hair style looks cartoonish to me and juvenile. I was surprised to learn he is 33 years old.

[Hip-to-be-Square]

I read the Reality Steve stuff and Nate basically lead on a girl for a year and a half and met her family and friends, even went to a wedding with her as her +1, took multiple trips to see her AND started dating another girl on the side and led that girl on too.  When Nate was questioned by both girls, he rudely called them "nobody" to reassure each girl individually that there was nothing to worry about.  The guy's rocking a fucked-up haircut, needs longer suit pants, is a player and kept his daughter a secret from the longer-term girl even though his daughter is "his world".  Maybe he wanted to protect his daughter from meeting women, but he certainly didn't care at all about protecting these women's feelings.  This is unfortunately all too common in the bleak world of modern dating apps- a lot of guys will give the complete "boyfriend experience", but God forbid you assume or ask for exclusivity/ "what are we."  I'm glad these girls outed Nate for wasting their time and leading them on.  And he needs to ditch the Claire's faux-pearl necklace on his way out of his first/last attempt at reality TV fame. 

[nlkm9]

7 hours ago, Hip-to-be-Square said:

I read the Reality Steve stuff and Nate basically lead on a girl for a year and a half and met her family and friends, even went to a wedding with her as her +1, took multiple trips to see her AND started dating another girl on the side and led that girl on too.  When Nate was questioned by both girls, he rudely called them "nobody" to reassure each girl individually that there was nothing to worry about.  The guy's rocking a fucked-up haircut, needs longer suit pants, is a player and kept his daughter a secret from the longer-term girl even though his daughter is "his world".  Maybe he wanted to protect his daughter from meeting women, but he certainly didn't care at all about protecting these women's feelings.  This is unfortunately all too common in the bleak world of modern dating apps- a lot of guys will give the complete "boyfriend experience", but God forbid you assume or ask for exclusivity/ "what are we."  I'm glad these girls outed Nate for wasting their time and leading them on.  And he needs to ditch the Claire's faux-pearl necklace on his way out of his first/last attempt at reality TV fame. 

We have def not seen the last if him. These girls who decided to “ get revenge”( still trying to understand what they get out of ir) have only bumped up the chatter about him and have made him way more visible than he was before . While im not crazy about him as bachelor, i think we will see much more of him despite their effort to get him off the screen. 

[chocolatine]

OK, so Nate is a player like at least half of the men who participate in this franchise. He didn't invade Ukraine.

[Hip-to-be-Square]

Does anybody know if David Spade is going to host "Bachelor in Paradise" again? He was so funny last season! If Jesse hosts the season, I'm ok with that too- especially if he's in a swimsuit 😘

[DEL901]

36 minutes ago, chocolatine said:

OK, so Nate is a player like at least half of the men who participate in this franchise. He didn't invade Ukraine.

You sure about that?   :D

32 minutes ago, Hip-to-be-Square said:

Does anybody know if David Spade is going to host "Bachelor in Paradise" again? He was so funny last season! If Jesse hosts the season, I'm ok with that too- especially if he's in a swimsuit 😘

Jesse hosted.  I like what he brings to the show.  

[Hip-to-be-Square]

22 minutes ago, chocolatine said:

My understanding is that Jesse is hosting BIP, not David Spade. I hope Jesse speaks Spanish as well as he does French. 😉

Thank you for clarifying the Bachelor in Paradise Host! Ooh if Jesse can speak Spanish in addition to French, that'd push him into ultra-hunk dreamboat territory for me 😅😍!  Also, your profile photo of that chocolate croissant looks so delicious- I bought one of those pastries the other day and thought of your profile photo!

4 minutes ago, DEL901 said:

You sure about that?   :D

Jesse hosted.  I like what he brings to the show.  

I like Jesse too- he has great salt and pepper facial hair, he's friendly and an all-around hunk! Even hotter now than when he was The Bachelor 😊.  

[JenE4]

Yes, let’s heal Bachelor Nation by focusing on some common ground: just how smoking hot Jesse is!

 

[DEL901]

54 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Yes, let’s heal Bachelor Nation by focusing on some common ground: just how smoking hot Jesse is!

 

One of the things I like about Jesse as host, and not just exhibit A above or the fact that he has been through it and can empathize, is that he has spent a lot of years honing his skills including hosting some baking and surfing shows, commentating on football etc.  He didn’t just get hired for his looks or connections, he has experience hosting and it shows.  

[StatisticalOutlier]

1 hour ago, JenE4 said:

Yes, let’s heal Bachelor Nation by focusing on some common ground: just how smoking hot Jesse is!

Sorry to disappoint, but he does nothing for me in the looks department.  Giant head, big teeth, stupid hairdo.  And the turned-up collar on the jacket is a little much.

I did like the French, but maybe only because it was a pleasant surprise.

3 hours ago, chocolatine said:

OK, so Nate is a player like at least half of the men who participate in this franchise.

And actually, being a player would seem like a useful background for being on the show.  If you're a combatant, knowledge about playering could help you navigate the situations more effectively.   If you're the lead, being a player is actually your job.

[nlkm9]

9 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Sorry to disappoint, but he does nothing for me in the looks department.  Giant head, big teeth, stupid hairdo.  And the turned-up collar on the jacket is a little much.

I did like the French, but maybe only because it was a pleasant surprise.

And actually, being a player would seem like a useful background for being on the show.  If you're a combatant, knowledge about playering could help you navigate the situations more effectively.   If you're the lead, being a player is actually your job.

I do not think jesse is cute, he was a so so bachelor but yes he is a great host!!!!!!! I lived chris harrison and hated the 2 girl hosts but jessa really is doing the job!!

[phlebas]

On 9/2/2022 at 5:51 PM, DEL901 said:

Rather than Kid n Play, Nate’s hair reminds me of a certain villain in Black panther played by Michael B Jordan.  

Nate is definitely going for the Killmonger Coif.  Props for trying, but he doesn't have the Michael B. Jordan presence needed to make it work.