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S05.E10: A Dark Ali


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At first I interpreted that as Ali having a venereal disease disguise so I was picturing her skulking around Rosewood late at night in one of those giant germ costumes.

 

 

No, that would be Aria, and it wouldn't be a disguise, it would just be what she chose to wear on Wednesday. LOL

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At first I interpreted that as Ali having a venereal disease disguise so I was picturing her skulking around Rosewood late at night in one of those giant germ costumes.

 

I thought the same thing.  Then I imagined Ezra writing poetry on the back of a VD pamphlet like that one chick from Rock of Love.

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What was it the doctor said the stabbing couldn't have been, was it that she said it was recent and he was all, no way, or she said it was old and he said, no this is pretty new? I forget which way that went.

 

IIRC, Ali told the doctor that she landed on a rock and cut her leg when she jumped out of the kidnapper's car.  Since, in her cover-story, she had just escaped from him, it should have been a fresh wound, but the doctor said it was an old injury.

 

 

I know everybody is saying the flashbacks are fake but I do not see how they would be

 

To me they looked real, and it looked like she was using those memories to concoct a plausible story.  For example, she was remembering the different parts of that basement she had been in, so that if the police found any physical evidence her story would match.  But I can totally see how someone would interpret her those scenes as her making up the memories. 

 

It's really frusrating, because we used to be able to rely on the content of flashbacks being reliable, even if the visualization of them was off (e.g., Toby's do-rag).  It gives the writers some more wiggle-room ("Oh, yeah, that particular flashback was unreliable") but it's a violation of their already established rules.  It'd be like introducing supernatural elements after 4 seasons of being purely mundane.  Oh wait...

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I know everybody is saying the flashbacks are fake but I do not see how they would be

 

I don't think Ali was making up those memories, she was in that basement. It's just not the whole story. She's only giving away the parts that make her look like the victim or changing them around to paint herself as the victim. I think the real story is going to be A LOT different. More like she was in control most of the time, those other kids were her minions including Cyrus.

 

As I said in previous posts, Cyrus may have in fact attacked her but I'm not so sure she didn't attack him first. 

 

She has two stories going already to make her the victim. The police think she was kidnapped by Cyrus and held in the basement, she told Emily she brought Cyrus into the basement she was already living in. She told Emily that Cyrus was stealing her stuff and attacked her while she was tying to get it back. Then she says A found Cyrus to set her up, when she set up Cyrus to take the fall. 

 

Then we see her with Cyrus where he says they had a lot of fun together. Now he's wanted for kidnapping. Ali was using him the entire time. That's the story that is probably closer to the truth since we got to see it from the other person in her story, Cyrus. In that scene I did not see scared, whiny Alison that she wants her friends, family and police to see. I saw strong, confident Alison that we know from previous flashbacks. I was afraid they were going to try to redeem Alison but so far they've shown Ali is the same as she always is a lying liar who lies. 

Edited by Sakura12
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Then we see her with Cyrus where he says they had a lot of fun together. Now he's wanted for kidnapping. Ali was using him the entire time. That's the story that is probably closer to the truth since we got to see it from the other person in her story, Cyrus. In that scene I did not see scared, whiny Alison that she wants her friends, family and police to see. I saw strong, confident Alison that we know from previous flashbacks. I was afraid they were going to try to redeem Alison but so far they've shown Ali is the same as she always is a lying liar who lies. 

 

I´m pretty sure when Cyrus said they had a lot of fun together he meant it sarcastic and to remind her what he did/almost did to her. And that´s probably what she has on him and how she blackmailed him to go with her plan. If this wasn´t ABC family I would bet he raped her, but they will probably never mention it openly, even when all the signs are there. Also, her appearing strong and confident is nothing new. She was the same with Byron even when in reality she was scared and desperate. 

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When would he have even raped her? They were together until she caught him trying to run away, then they had a shuffle and then he ran off with that other chick. I mean, if he wanted to leave with the other girl, why would he have raped Ali practically in front of her? Also, he seemed in kind of a hurry and as soon as he got Alison incapacitated by the stab wound he made a run for it anyways. I feel like Cyrus' main goal was clearly getting the hell out of there with the valuables, I didn't see any rapey undertones. The scene had a similar feeling perhaps because the guy physically overpowered her, which is very scary in itself, but it wasn't sexual IMO.

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What are these signs I keep reading about? I can't think of a single sign that Cyrus raped Ali so I'm curious what it is I'm missing.

 

Same with me. I saw no signs that Ali was raped. Attacked with a sharp object, possibly. Doesn't mean it was Cyrus. Knowing the way Alison rolls, she could've gotten it a million other ways, including from Aria when she was trapped in the box with Garret. 

 

That's why I'm not buying her "poor me" act. I don't think she was ever the victim with the Cyrus situation. But then again, I'm one of the ones that doesn't want Alison to be an innocent victim, I want her to be her bad manipulative self. It's the entire point that make her interesting, just like it does for Jenna and Mona. Without it, she's boring. If they do plan on making her poor little me, then they should've left her dead because they completely ruined her allure. Then they need to give me more Jenna and Mona since they are the ones that are still interesting and mysterious.

Edited by Sakura12
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Earlier in the season, the father and the examiner were hinting at Alison having been raped, strongly. 

 

This flashback, we see him push her against a wall, put his hand up against her mouth..and slash the "inside of her thigh." It's like the video of Ali and Ian sleeping together..the suggestion is there, even if the show doesn't mention it. 

 

As for whether it would be odd for her to track him down and blackmail him. I don't think that's odd at all. In fact, that's Ali. 

Edited by mercfan3
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Earlier in the season, the father and the examiner were hinting at Alison having been raped, strongly.

 

Her father obviously wasn't there to witness any possible rape and Alison lies to him all the time. Of course he is going to suspect rape as would anyone in this situation. Doesn't mean anything one or the other, if you ask me. And as far I recall the examiner avoided the subject like the plague. The show isn't under censorship rules to avoid the word rape or rape storylines so why do it this time? Might as well assume Cyrus is a serial killer too, there is about as much evidence for that than there is for the rape allegation, IMO.

 

 

This flashback, we see him push her against a wall, put his hand up against her mouth..and slash the "inside of her thigh." It's like the video of Ali and Ian sleeping together..the suggestion is there, even if the show doesn't mention it.

 

Not really. Pretty much everyone who saw Ian and Alison thought they must have had sex while judging from the reaction on this and other sites I visit only a small fraction of viewers thought of possible rape in the Ali-Cyrus thing. Let's put it this way - not many people bring a camera to the bedroom for other purpose than film sex (or lie on the ground in the woods with their boyfriend for any purpose other than sex, if you mean the season 1 video). On other hand, many people do push other people against walls and punch them or stab them without raping them, so in the one case the allusion is not so much an allusion as is the obvious conclusion, in other other it is a stretch.

 

 

As for whether it would be odd for her to track him down and blackmail him. I don't think that's odd at all. In fact, that's Ali.

 

But what could she have blackmailed him with? "I will accuse you of rape and assault unless you go and admit to kidnapping me for two years" doesn't sound entirely convincing, does it? Especially since unless Cyrus lives in a cage he can always say "Well, then I will tell the authorities you weren't actually kidnapped". Much more likely scenario for me is them being on relatively good terms, which is why he agreed to that risky gambit and she didn't renege on the deal.

Edited by Jack Shaftoe
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It's like the video of Ali and Ian sleeping together..the suggestion is there, even if the show doesn't mention it

 

Because the show stated they didn't have sex, I would logically assume Cyrus didn't rape Ali. And the only reason anyone is assuming Ali was raped (father, examiner) is because they think she was abducted and that is the most common reason for men to abduct teenage girls. What, the imaginary abductor took her to clean his house? nope. When a teenage girl is abducted 90% of the time she is either raped or killed. Since Ali wasn't killed it's logical to assume she was raped.

 

However we, the audience, know she wasn't abducted. That is one of her many lies. And nothing in her demeanor implies she was raped by this particular person. I don't care how "cool" she was with Mr, Montgomery when she was threatening him and he threatened back. That is a completely different situation. When someone actually does rape you, you can't just casually chat with them, and you sure has hell don't have the upper hand when around them. Unless the show did absolutely NO research at all into rape and being a victim of rape, then nope, nothing on the show has given me any reason to even mildly suspect she's been raped.

 

I still see no evidence that she was supposed to have been raped. But since the writing on this show can be pretty terrible, I will admit they might go there but for me it will have come out of no where and even in retrospect I won't see any of this as evidence they meant it all along.

Edited by Mabinogia
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My thought is that Ali was raped at some point, but probably not by Cyrus.

 

I could even buy that Ian raped her. People have, what appear to outsiders, as odd relationships with their abusers, especially at that young age. I suppose you could say it's a bit like Stockholm Syndrome. 

 

Re: the Ian filming Ali and the sheets being messed up, they may have not actually had sex, but there's a lot of other sexual things they can do. Ian could've even been filming Ali masterbating. I'm not sure that writers are allowed to openly say those things, however. Troian has said before that the writers have come up with a lot of storylines that ABCFamily has vetoed. Which is what I assume happened with the Toby as A retcon. 

 

I think the writers are walking a careful line with Ali. She's a villain, but she may also be a victim. That doesn't mean that her victimhood excuses her villainy. 

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I don't think she was raped based on her being abducted. I base it on the suggestions the show has been making since the beginning of this season and the way the flashback looked. 

 

And yes, the show is on some censorship. Troian said the Toby storyline was supposed to be much different but ABC Family wouldn't let them do it because it was too dark. So that's one example. It could be that, like with Ian/Ali sex scenes, the show would let IMK hint at it but not actually say it. 

 

Could it be that Ali is completely making this up? That Ali was running a crime circle and Cyrus is the victim. Sure. But this is also another alternative, that..honestly..there is more evidence for. (Although, count me as someone who actually wants Ali's stab wound to be from Aria.) 

 

I do agree that she's both a villain and a victim. The question with her character is that sometimes you don't know when she's being what. 

Edited by mercfan3
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I know we already have a lot of opinions on the issue of Alison's possible rape, but figured I would add mine.  I definitely don't think the show has implied that Alison was raped.  I get that ABC Family tells the writers to tone down certain storylines, but the writers should be able to imply that Alison was raped more clearly than they have.  For example, a scene where Alison was showering and crying (may not be original but would have at least gotten the point across) or any scene for that matter where Alison was upset about seeing Cyrus, without other people around.  Even the sex scene between Alison and Emily could have implied something had happened.  Alison could have asked Emily to stop and implied that she was uncomfortable being sexually intimate with anyone.  Basically, going on what we have been shown so far, I don't think we are meant to believe that Alison was raped.

 

That being said, I do think the show is trying to imply that something bad happened to Alison.  Part of that is Alison's scared victim act she has been trying to sell to everyone, but the other part comes from the way certain scenes were written.  The writers, particularly early in the season, wanted us to feel bad for Alison.  I think that lead to a lot of scenes being written and directed to imply that something traumatic had happened to Alison.  Those scenes could be meant to build up to a reveal in the next two episodes (possibly that Alison was raped or something else traumatic).  The other option is that the writers didn't want to give away anything about what happened to Alison, so they didn't include flashback that actually showed us something bad happening to her.  Instead they included several scenes were the tone implied that something traumatic had happened, which in many cases is how rape, domestic abuse, and other horrible events are alluded to.  So even though the writers, directors, and producers were simply trying to get the audience's sympathy for the character, many people are now reading certain scenes as implying that Alison was raped.

Edited by superman1204
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IMO this show's about as subtle as a sledgehammer, so if they wanted to imply Ali was raped, we'd all know it. That doesn't mean they can't still decide that's what happened, in which case we'll get a couple of eps where they'll ramp it up to 11, before the shocking reveal. But they also seem to be hellbent on de-sexualising Ali (retconning her relationship with Ian, never had sex with Ezra, never had sex with Cyrus), so I doubt we'll actually see such a dark storyline there.

 

Also, the show already handled one rape storyline (Jenna/Toby) pretty poorly, I have no desire to see another one. 

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I could see that scarletregina. I always thought something bad might have happened to Ali at the hands of one of Jason's druggie friends. Ali has always seemed a little scared from the flashbacks. She's dropped a million hints about not feeling safe. Now, that could be all A but I always got the impression she didn't feel safe in her own house. I think that is going to be the big story. WTF was going on in the DeLaurentis house that made Ali feel safer running away than going to her father and saying someone tried to kill me daddy, can we all get the hell out of this town?

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I don't doubt that the DiLaurentis family was fucked up, but that scene also happened at a time where the show wanted us to think the NAT club and Jason were possibly the real enemy so they put that in there. The problem with all the red herrings of the show is that you end up with a bazillion scenes that were clearly meant to provoke a reaction that might end up totally scrapped later on when the writers move on to another storyline. Like how nothing about Cece makes sense. Or when Karate Dude who Aria was dating got stabbed by those knifes. We were meant to think it was Ezra. Now it clearly wasn't Ezra since he wasn't A and we're back to love interest territory. So why the hell would A care one lick about Aria's recently dumped boyfriend? She never even knew about the injury and Karate Dude had squat all to do with anything. I doubt it will ever come up again. 

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 Like how nothing about Cece makes sense.

And where is she? She was part of the big finale, we heard about her all last season, & then this season, nothing. They just dropped her like everything else.

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Well, that part is clear: she got the Vivian passport and left. Why would she risk coming back?

 

The problem with all the red herrings of the show is that you end up with a bazillion scenes that were clearly meant to provoke a reaction that might end up totally scrapped later on when the writers move on to another storyline.

This. So much this. The retcon powers are strong with Ali's storyline. I don't even blame the showrunners for it, tbh. When they started out they might have had an idea where they wanted the story to go, but then they needed more and more twists. Who would have planned for at least 7 seasons? That is huge for a serial drama built around one central mystery. Even Lost floundered under the weight of its huge number of hours, and it had a much larger cast of characters to mine for flashbacks and the like.

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This. So much this. The retcon powers are strong with Ali's storyline. I don't even blame the showrunners for it, tbh. When they started out they might have had an idea where they wanted the story to go, but then they needed more and more twists. Who would have planned for at least 7 seasons? That is huge for a serial drama built around one central mystery. Even Lost floundered under the weight of its huge number of hours, and it had a much larger cast of characters to mine for flashbacks and the like.

I agree with your post and the one it was replying to so much.  The only thing that I wanted to say is that I don't think the show runners are blameless for the amount of red herrings.  Like you said, no could have imagined how long this show would go on for, and even if they had, a good amount of filler would have needed to be added.  That being said, after season 2, I think it was clear the show was going to go on longer than planned and I wish the show runners had started to be smarter about how they stretched out the material.  For example, Toby's redemption lasted like twenty minutes.  Having Toby prove that he is loyal and having Spencer forgive him in a normal amount of time, could have easily lasted an entire season.  Also Aria hasn't had any character development, with the possible exception of finding Ezra's book, and the other three girls haven't really had much in the way of character growth lately.  I'm just thinking that the show runners could have been a lot smarter about how they went about dragging out the show's central mystery.

Edited by superman1204
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That being said, after season 2, I think it was clear the show was going to go on longer than planned and I wish the show runners had started to be smarter about how they stretched out the material.

 

They should have resolved everything that has to do with A and moved forward with new mysteries, IMO. Not that this was going to make much sense either but at least we wouldn't be in season 5 with much of the audience still waiting for answers to events that happened in season 1 (or before the show even started). Plus, A is getting increasingly pathetic and slasher flick killer like with all the murders and his/her apparent inability to manage to kill Jenna or Alison despite numerous attempt. The protagonists also end up looking like utter morons for still not taking the simplest of measures like looking for listening devices. A completely new mystery, fewer murders per season and a less omniscient villain would be a good thing, I think.

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I've been going through all my lingering questions about this show.  Maybe there are answers I've missed, but at this point in season 5, I'm wondering:  What the hell was the NAT Club?  How did dirty Wilden get tangled up with Ali?  What's up with the crazy Fitzgeralds and how do they fit into the DiLaurentis drama?  (Because I'm pretty sure that they do.)  When will Spencer dump Toby and make out with Noel Kahn?

 

At this point in season 5, I'm also wondering what, if anything, has brought us closer to figuring out A and A's game, or finding out who killed Bethany or Mrs. D?  We know A is escalating in levels of crazy and danger, what with the bombing, the choke attack on Ali, and the video of Mrs D being buried with the message that A is the one who buried her.  But what had seemed one of A's crazier stunts, sending Cyrus in to Rosewood PD to confess to Ali's kidnapping, turned out to be Ali's doing.  The more I think on it, the more I think Ali is behind all or most of these things, because she likes to manipulate people by playing at being in danger, and because she has to hide her past activities from the police.  I do think she got herself into actual danger(s) with all her manipulative games, but I believe Ali still is playing her own game, as evidenced by the fact that our little Lolita, Vivian Darkbloom, lives on.  Now that we know Ali was behind the Cyrus scheme, I have to wonder, why would A steal the recording from Spencer's super secret hiding place, if it wasn't to provide Cyrus with the recording so he could memorize the story?  Just to call Spencer and play part of it?  I don't think so.  The recording alone can't do Ali damage--it's from the doctor's office and is just a detailed version of her official story, not her confessing her ruse to the liars.  Stealing the recording was Ali's cover, so the liars think that A is really after Ali, much like having Noel break into the Marin house.  I could totally imagine Ali being a good enough spy to know where her friend and next door neighbor's hiding place is.  She knew a lot of her neighbors' secrets, after all.  I can admit that, if this is the case, the scene at the end of the previous episode, with gloved A hands playing the stolen recording at the eye doctor, does not make that much sense.  Why would Ali skulk at the eye doctor's in a hoodie and gloves?  Why would any other A, for that matter?  Just to encrypt a scary message to Spencer in the eye charts?  (Why bother?)  To get into Jenna's files to find out how much the bitch can really see?  I guess the scene doesn't make that much sense to me, even without my Ali is part of A theory.  But it was only scary when I thought A was setting Ali up to charge an innocent man with kidnapping and who knows what else.  

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They should have resolved everything that has to do with A and moved forward with new mysteries, IMO. Not that this was going to make much sense either but at least we wouldn't be in season 5 with much of the audience still waiting for answers to events that happened in season 1 (or before the show even started). Plus, A is getting increasingly pathetic and slasher flick killer like with all the murders and his/her apparent inability to manage to kill Jenna or Alison despite numerous attempt. The protagonists also end up looking like utter morons for still not taking the simplest of measures like looking for listening devices. A completely new mystery, fewer murders per season and a less omniscient villain would be a good thing, I think.

A has gotten to the point where they're a terrorist. It's completely ridiculous, they're blowing up houses now, where does A get the knowledge & equipment to blow up a house? What have Ali or the other liars done to them for things to escalate this big? The show needs to get things back to reality.

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I know everybody is saying the flashbacks are fake but I do not see how they would be

 

The main reason I believed that the flashbacks were fake is that they were filmed in a much choppier fashion than any other flashbacks. The filming made it seem like Ali was coming up with the story as she went along rather than recounting a real experience. 

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The main reason I believed that the flashbacks were fake is that they were filmed in a much choppier fashion than any other flashbacks. The filming made it seem like Ali was coming up with the story as she went along rather than recounting a real experience.

 

Another possibility for the flashbacks being so differently filmed is that they're meant to suggest the possibility of Ali having multiple personalities, and the personality that was in control in the basement is not the personality who was in control when Ali was having the flashbacks - in other words, Personality A was accessing the memories of Personality B, hence the choppiness.

 

I do believe one way or another there's going to be two Alis, whether twins or multiple personalities. The choppy flashbacks make me think the latter, but the scar makes me think the former (since it's an easy way to reveal the existence of twins - Twin A has the scar and Twin B does not). Or hell, because this show is not known for restraint, maybe it's both - twins, and one twin has multiple personalities.

 

The video is not making it look good for Melissa's survival, but I'll be deeply pissed if they kill her off. She's one of my favorite guest characters, and I always thought she would end up playing a key role when the show finally gets around to resolving the mystery since she's a Hastings.

 

Since Emison is one of my favorite crack ships on this show, I was pretty thrilled to see the way things went down between them in this episode. It'd been kind of too easy a road storytelling-wise - Emily got to finally have sex with Ali about a week after she got back to town, and stayed pretty solidly in her corner thereafter. Now they're estranged, so Ali will have to work at it and Emily will probably rebound with Paige for a bit, which will make me laugh because I can't stand Paige and it'll amuse me to see her being the rebound who will inevitably be dumped for Ali again. (Note that I don't want Emison to be endgame, but I do want them to be Emily's main on/off relationship for the remainder of the show. Bye Paige!)

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They should have resolved everything that has to do with A and moved forward with new mysteries, IMO. Not that this was going to make much sense either but at least we wouldn't be in season 5 with much of the audience still waiting for answers to events that happened in season 1 (or before the show even started). Plus, A is getting increasingly pathetic and slasher flick killer like with all the murders and his/her apparent inability to manage to kill Jenna or Alison despite numerous attempt. The protagonists also end up looking like utter morons for still not taking the simplest of measures like looking for listening devices. A completely new mystery, fewer murders per season and a less omniscient villain would be a good thing, I think.

I'm not sure if this show would still work without an A, but I do agree the writers should have tied up loose ends before moving on to new stories.  While the books are by no means an example of great storytelling, Sara Shepard at least divided the books up into story arcs of four books each, as apposed to the show which has created a continuous cluster fuck of storylines and secrets.  Also dividing the show up into distinct story arcs of two or three season each, would have given the writers a chance to change the feel of each A instead simple escalating A's activities.  At the end of each story arc the writers could wrap up the existing mysteries, deal with the current A, and then just leave enough secrets to lead into the next story arc.

 

For example:

  • Season 1 and 2: Mona as A.  Basically the same as the show except Lucas's involvement and all of Mona other secrets are explained at the end of season 2 or start of season 3, instead of waiting until the start of season 4 to tell us Lucas was the one who gave Emily the A massage (seriously did anyone even remember that mystery before Mona confessed about it).
  • Season 3 and 4: Cece as Redcoat (they could have even had her sign text messages Redcoat instead of A).  The writers could have easily made Cece an actually villain by giving her an ax to grind with the Hastings or someone else important in town.  My thought was Redcoat could start off giving the Lairs information about Alison's web of secrets in exchange for help with her plans.  As the story arc progresses the Lairs start to release they are in over their heads and try to get out, only to have Redcoat drag them back in.
  • Season 5, 6, and 7:  Alison's attempted murderer is A.  Alison returns, the Lairs deal with their respective Ali-related baggage, and they deal with the final A, who is characterized by a complete lack of emotion.  Also I would like Alison to in someway be related to the final A.

 

I'm not saying everything I just wrote would have been perfect or the only way that the writer could have laid out the story arcs, but my point it wouldn't be all that hard to divide up the show.  Also I was thinking each A could have represented a different facet of Alison personal.  Mona as A would have been Alison's mean girl tactics taken to the extreme.  Redcoat would have represented Alison's mentality of 'your part of my circle, now I own you'.  Lastly, the final A would have shared Alison complete lack of genuine emotional.   Sorry for how long and rambling this post is, but my point is a don't think A, per se, is the problem, but more the way the writers feel the need to drag out every storyline about A and Alison, has definitely lead to the show being such a convoluted mess and A becoming a domestic terrorist.

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@superman1204, yes, I agree that the showrunners could have handled various aspects of the storyline and characterization better. But I see it as different from the red herrings. There is no excuse for the awful handling of TobAy and Ezria; meanwhile, I can wave off the fact that, for example, Mona receiving orders from Red Coat CeCe while in Radley and all her actions at the lodge make zero sense now that we know Mona was aware Ali was alive and doesn't even want her dead, just out of Rosewood. Actually, why didn't Mona just send her the money to stay away?

 

Now that we know Ali was behind the Cyrus scheme, I have to wonder, why would A steal the recording from Spencer's super secret hiding place, if it wasn't to provide Cyrus with the recording so he could memorize the story?

I've also been thinking of a post about Ali's actions and the actions she passes off as A, but I'm too lazy to write it. Lemme just say now that I agree with the shade Ali's involvement with Cyrus is throwing on the existence of Current!A. But the brilliant side of Spencer's recording being stolen is that Ali didn't need to steal it to provide Cyrus with one (since she was the one that made them) while people other than A would also have been motivated to steal it as proof that the story is a lie; that's two steps away from Spencer suspecting Ali when it comes to the theft - I do believe she could have the recording stolen though, precisely to have Spencer focused on something that isn't her increasingly shady actions.

 

If Ali gave Cyrus a plane ticket (it looked that way, no?) that only proves that sending CeCe to safety didn't mean using up her last resources, which is another nail in the "no choice but to return to Rosewood" coffin. And speaking of coffins, Ali receiving that recording of her mother only reminded me that the timing of that death makes more sense if Ali came back because of it than if Mrs D was killed because Ali was coming back.

Edited by Crim
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We've gotten several hints that Ali is A this season. Which means she's not A. They're more anvils than the subtle hints that were Toby, Ezra, and Mona (at first..we started getting hit with anvils at the end of that.) 

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Hanna isn't a alcoholic she is a binge whatever. She binged when she was stressed on food in the past but Caleb was drinking so she took a chug and.....

To be honest I just don't care. I don't want PLL to become the show where everybody goes to rehab or whatever. One, I find that annoying on any show and two, I think of PLL as a teenage soapy version of the Sienfeld rule of "no hugging. No learning". This is a show where crazy shit just happens. I like the crazy shit. I don't want anybody to become a better person. I don't want a detour into 12 step land.

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FOR THE LOVE OF GOD EMILY! Have your many injuries given you brain damage? Why are you so stupid?

Ali: so that complete stranger A wants me to finger for the kidnapping, well I actually know him. I was living in this loft style basement place and met him somewhere (that I'm not going to say) and he came to live with me! Because when you're in hiding because you fear for your life you always invite random hookups to come to your bat-cave. I mean, a girl's got need! Amirite? You know what I'm talking about Em! So anywho, everything was just great, opps I mean scarey and awful, but tragically bearable until he started to want my stuff. You see, I had this stuff because when I ran for my life after being buried alive I took a u-haul worth of art work and nick-nacks to decorate with. Home is where the heart is and all. So where was I? Oh yeah, he was after all of my stuff that it was totally normal for me to have...in hiding...in a basement about 10 minutes away from here...because I was afraid for my life. Then things got ugly. I can't talk about it *sob* but he gave me this scar. The very scar that I tried to lie to the doctor about to back up my bogus kidnapping time line. *sob*

Anyone else on earth: *eyeroll*

Emily: oh my god! The story is totally tragic and plausible and has no giant holes in it! Can I give you a hug...in bed...naked?

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