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S03.E14: Love Is Love


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2 hours ago, Spectator said:

I remember attending the wedding of a friend when I was around 25 - I recall having weird, contradictory feelings where I was happy for my friend, who looked so beautiful and seemed so so happy in the moment, but at the same time I was so sad because I was certain that the marriage was a terrible mistake (I was right…infidelity, emotional abuse and a messy divorce were soon to follow). I haven't had that same feeling since…up until last night, that is. And more than once, sadly. Both Alina and Corey ignored AAAALLLLL the red flags in their relationships and wound up married. I just wanted to fast forward through both weddings…I didn’t see either as a reason to celebrate anything as I’m quite certain they could both be quite a bit happier with other people. Or alone even. I hate watching people get rolled over and then going back for more. They can’t even say they weren’t warned…

As I was ff through the episode it froze on a shot of Corey and Evelin.  The look on her face towards him was how I looked at my exhusband at the end of the road.  (Actually many times during our marriage, lol!)  

 

2 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

Also its nice to gift each other a big insurance policy.  One passes the other is protected!

We have that as well, also we have living wills and wills.  Best love letter you will ever write to your family is a will.  And a health care directive.

2 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Did we ever learn how Kenny came to have children? Surrogate? Adoption? 

My memory is a female friend married him on paper so they could get in vitro and she had a son and then triplets.  I believe she was not involved in bringing them up.  

Did Allina sign the pre-nush?

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I don't want to defend Ari, but I wonder if there's not a more real reason for why she won't go back to Ethiopia?  When did the civil war start?  Maybe it was too dangerous to go back even just prior to the war?  I totally expect Sharp to push the more entertaining explanation.

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On 11/27/2021 at 3:56 PM, Frozendiva said:

Maybe Steven has an inheritance.

Inheritances are generally considered not to be marital property, and can keep their non-marital property status throughout a marriage, and divorce. 

So here's a tip for all y'all:  If you inherit money during your marriage, it's your separate property.  If you want it to stay that way, have the inheritance put into a new, separate account established solely for that inherited money, and don't ever add anything to it.   The key is maintaining its identity as inherited, separate property, and it's massively easier if it stays there in its own account and never has marital property commingled with it. 

There's no problem with spending that money, except that it reduces this separate property of yours.  But there is a big problem with adding money that could make it impossible to trace the inherited part.

4 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

I have a strong suspicion that the "favorite person" choice was a cutesy in joke of Armando and Kenny's. I know that it appears to be common among the young 'uns these days to refer to a partner/boyfriend/girlfriend as "my person". 

Kenny is far from being a young 'un.

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In an earlier episode, after the astrologer scolded Mama Sumit for being a "selfish mother", Mom had that talk with Jenny where she said "We love you".  I didn't believe it at the time, of course, but now her true colors will probably come out when she finds out they are married.  It looks like Sumit will tell her on the Tell All episode.  She may not freak out while on the air, but I hope we get to see her full-out reaction at some point.

Perhaps now that it is a done deed she will surprise us and just be resigned to "the will of the God".

When Jenny and Sumit were feeding the holy men at the temple and Jenny knocked over that one guy's food, and she kept apologizing, did anyone else take that as a bad omen for the marriage?  They were supposed to be there to receive blessings for feeding the men.  Oops.

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7 hours ago, seasons said:

I loved Kenny's moment about the series significance of this marriage. About how AIDS ravaged so many of his friends. How incredible that their marriage was even possible when not so long ago it couldn't even have been imagined, and in places in the world today, just being gay is risking your life.

I was genuinely moved by this moment. When he got teary-eyed about how he wished his friends could have seen the world change, I got teary-eyed, too.

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I think Jenny is basically a nice person but what attracts her to Sumit is a mystery to me. Ok, he’s young … that’s about it.  But he lies, he’s not supportive or even particularly caring as far as I can see.  Hope she enjoys years of good health, because he’s not going to nurse her and I don’t know what the Indian healthcare system is like if she falls ill.

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I am wondering about Jenny's visa situation.  She has been notified that her extension has expired and will not be renewed. Now that she is married, does she automatically get to stay in India, or does she have to go back to the US and apply for a spousal visa?

I was also wondering about the astrologer.  Initially he said they should not get married in the temple, it would be bad luck (or something like that), and now he is all "yeah, okay, go ahead and get married in the temple, no problem".

Is is possible he is just telling people what they want to hear??  Nah...it couldn't be that...

Edited by treeofdreams
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21 minutes ago, the-grey-lady said:

I was genuinely moved by this moment. When he got teary-eyed about how he wished his friends could have seen the world change, I got teary-eyed, too.

So was I. It made me think of that movie Longtime Companion, where in the end all those who'd died of AIDS came back to life on the beach at Fire Island. I could barely breathe for sobbing in the theater. So many friends lost. For once Kenny was weeping with good reason.

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57 minutes ago, Ucross said:

Not necessary. I'm single and had in vitro in NYC.

I believe this was the late 80's and people had to be married?  (I don't agree but........times have changed.)  And I think he had it in Ohio, much different vibe than NYC.  Was in both places this summer! 

My hubs has an aunt who had a long time boyfriend of ten years.  He contracted cancer and the hospital would not allow her into the room when he was receiving treatments nor share any information with her as they were not married.  In 2019!  So, they got married, lol!

16 hours ago, JeanJean said:

Normal sensitive person: I don't want to walk down the block where my ex lives.

Ari: I don't want to go back to a whole country where nothing bad happened because it upsets me because I made up that it did in my head.

Right?  My son is moving into an apartment and I am like, will your dad be there?  (Praying he won't, lol!)  To be blunt, it will involve working and hauling stuff so I am gonna guess it will be a no!

Edited by Mrs. Hanson
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1 hour ago, Mondrianyone said:

So was I. It made me think of that movie Longtime Companion, where in the end all those who'd died of AIDS came back to life on the beach at Fire Island. I could barely breathe for sobbing in the theater. So many friends lost. For once Kenny was weeping with good reason.

That film, Longtime Companion !!.....just being reminded of it brings the tears flowing.  I was active in the theater then, and had many gay male friends who made my world a happier, funnier, kinder place.  There were memorials after memorials after memorials to honor their lives. I try to remember the incredible humor and the brightness they brought to my life.  😔  I will never stop missing them. ❤️

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This lacklustre season is finally over.

Corey and Evelin: Why bother with the second wedding? Evelin, if you don't believe in the fancy, expensive gown, don't buy one and spend a lot of money for a big dinner and dance. And not eat much. Raul the wildcard took the high road and congratulated the couple. Whether it was real or not, who knows. Maybe go away for a while and catch up with us a year or two down the line.

Bini and Ari: Ari, you act like there is a stick up your derriere. You are supposed to help your fiance get a K1 visa and not flounce away because you are angry at him. What exactly horrible happened to you in Ethiopia? You were expected to grow up? Have consequences for your actions? Treat people as human beings? You chose this guy. You had a kid with him. You are responsible for your own actions and mommy and daddy can't clean up the mess for you. Maybe you can get some therapy to help you deal with your crap. You and Bini won't last long if you don't. He will come to resent you, if he doesn't already.

Steven and Alina: The pre-nush was rude and inappropriate. Rounding up the cats was weird. The Star Wars thing was weird. And yet, Alina looked past all the red flags and still married you. She looked lovely in the traditional gown. Inviting the landlord and his wife and the receptionist? A bit odd. Good luck to you kids. You will need it. Steven, you won't change unless you have to do so and you want to do so. Alina, you could have finished your studies, started working, travel, have fun and then met a guy to share your life with.

Kenny and Armando: The most sane of all the couples. Both have their flaws, both are not perfect, both can be stubborn and selfish. Both also have dealt with love and loss in their lives. They are more understanding of wedding vows and what better and worse and the good and bad days of their lives actually means and have lived through some rough times.  I also grew up in the age of AIDS (a little younger than Kenny) and a lot of people died and it was a very scary time. I understand Kenny getting to this point in his life and reflecting on those whose lives were cut short. No idea if the drama of Armando's parents was real or just a storyline. Papa Armando showed up, he smiled and laughed and cried. His wife/Armando's mother looked beautiful. Both looked as if they are part of the marriage long haul and make good life partners. The wedding was probably one of the nicest in the show so far. The couple may have less dysfunction than some of the more ill-suited pairings and seem solid. They will still deal with a lot of stuff, and Kenny's family. Hopefully they can set some healthy boundaries in having an adult family relationship. Kenny is still 'dad' but he is still on his own journey.

Jenny and Sumit: After 10 long years, the wait is over. Sumit finally got over some of his fears and married Jenny. The age difference is a bit problematic, her coming to India when Sumit was in his 20s is a bit problematic, there isn't really much they have in common. Maybe it is just one of those things. Will they last? Who knows. Sumit doesn't seem to be husband material and comes across as immature in terms of his parents. The culture is very different and Jenny should be a younger bride. A 10 year age difference wouldn't be that much of an issue. Maybe Sumit wanted someone older who maybe didn't have much of a marriage, had kids and maybe wouldn't notice red flags. Perhaps he is hiding things about himself. Or sometimes love is love and age is just a number. My spidey sense thinks something may be a little 'off' but it could just be editing.

 

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2 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Steven and Alina:  Rounding up the cats was weird.

Steven is odd...and weird...and won't function well without serious help and guidance from adults...for the rest of his life.  His parents have probably breathed signs of relief (temporarily).  Still, "rounding up the cats" was a very sweet gesture.  Steven has probably gone through life failing, disappointing people--and then coming up with sweet gestures.

2 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

The Star Wars thing was weird.

Because STEVEN is weird.  That will never change.

2 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Inviting the landlord and his wife and the receptionist? A bit odd.

Odd...but again sweet.  So much better than having ABSOLUTELY NO ONE at the ceremony.  They were probably happy to be included.

2 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Steven, you won't change unless you have to do so and you want to do so.

Steven's mental capacity won't allow him to change; and it's not his fault.  He doesn't get it...because he just can't.

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5 hours ago, Ucross said:

Not necessary. I'm single and had in vitro in NYC.

Kenny did this at least 25 years ago in FL. Very different back then. 

 

Steven talking about the cats had me ROTFL! "We're not that close to that one" and "It wouldn't be appropriate to bring that one." And he was dead serious. So funny. When the planner said they would hold the cats so they wouldn't get away was funny, too. I wonder if they tried to do that.  Has anyone tried to hold a feral, stray cat? No thanks!

 

I was also surprised at how good Jenny looked. She's an idiot but she looked beautiful. 

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6 hours ago, treeofdreams said:

When Jenny and Sumit were feeding the holy men at the temple and Jenny knocked over that one guy's food, and she kept apologizing, did anyone else take that as a bad omen for the marriage?  They were supposed to be there to receive blessings for feeding the men.  Oops.

I think that could be.  (I wasn’t sure how that happened.  Did she step on his leaf? )

I hope they got all the other little details of the rituals right, otherwise they might not really be married!  What a blow that would be LOL

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As I said elsewhere, I hope Alina gets on birth control and keeps it locked up (if it’s the pill and condoms and not an IUD) so Steven can’t sabotage it and baby trap her against her wishes. Assuming, of course, that she doesn’t want a kid right away. Something tells me Steven wants to keep her tied to him and a kid would be just the way to do that. I just hope she comes to her senses very soon. 

I don’t know that I buy that Parents Sumit don’t know Sumit and Jenny got married. Wouldn’t somebody have told them by now? Someone in the community who saw the filming at the temple? 

Edited by Mrs. Landingham
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Well, I often doze off and apparently I did for this episode. I honestly did not see Jenny and Sumit get married. I saw only the preparation and the about to be married and I thought the powers that be were holding it over for the next episode.

I am in shock reading that they did get married- though more than one or two of you has commented questioning if the marriage will be viewed as being proper. (so more to come...)

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1 hour ago, Polliwollidoodle said:

Well, I often doze off and apparently I did for this episode. I honestly did not see Jenny and Sumit get married. I saw only the preparation and the about to be married and I thought the powers that be were holding it over for the next episode.

I am in shock reading that they did get married- though more than one or two of you has commented questioning if the marriage will be viewed as being proper. (so more to come...)

Their wedding was the last 10 minutes of the show!

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19 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

So Steven might have something worth protecting with a pre nup!  What can it be?  He always seems to be one sandwich short of a picnic but money could explain Alina being so anixious.

Money? Property?  Does he even work?  I'm intrigued about what can it be?

He has nothing.  It is ALL about control.  And that is scary.  Unless you come from inherited money, most 24 year olds have nothing.   Except college loan debt!

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Hi everyone! I posted a bunch over on TWOP, but until now have only lurked here. Time to join back in!

 

 I wanted to ask if there are any Russian speakers out there? I took some classes years ago and have forgotten most of it, but still have some key words, so, my question is this:

During SteVen and Alina’s vows, the officiant asked basically, if SteVen would be her husband (can’t remember the exact wording) and he replied “ Ochen prevyet”.. um doesn’t that translate to “very hello”? And not “yes”?
 

I wonder if that is some kind of loophole that he will use to weasel out of the marriage later on, as he didn’t actually say “da”.

thoughts?

 

Glad to finally be back after years of lurking!

 

Edited by Dishin
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1 hour ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

He has nothing.  It is ALL about control.  And that is scary.  Unless you come from inherited money, most 24 year olds have nothing.   Except college loan debt!

Hahaha, you are adorable! If 20 year old recently unemployed door to door exterminator Steven spent 5 minutes in college I will cheerfully eat an automobile of your choosing on national television. Alina will get a job while Steven tries to launch his career as a DJ, count on it. 

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1 minute ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Hahaha, you are adorable! If 20 year old recently unemployed door to door exterminator Steven spent 5 minutes in college I will cheerfully eat an automobile of your choosing on national television. Alina will get a job while Steven tries to launch his career as a DJ, count on it. 

HA HA HA!  I love it when @Pepper Mostly quotes me!!  I assumed (wrongly) that he was out of college.  Oopsies!  So he is an exterminator, ala Brandon?  And he is ANOTHER aspiring DJ?  Ooof - where are my anti nausea meds?

I think I have an extra level of repel towards him as he reminds me of most of the 5/6 graders I work with - trying to navigate who you are socially, how others see you, being odd for attention, etc.  But these kids are 10.  Steven is a bit too old for that.

42 minutes ago, Dishin said:

I wonder if that is some kind of loophole that he will use to weasel out of the marriage later on, as he didn’t actually say “da”.

thoughts?

He can weasel all he wants.  All you need is a license, signed by the officiant and whatever else the state/country demands.  No words needed.  You can be on your way to the airport to catch a flight and sign off in the TSA line, and as long as the government acknowledges it, you are married.

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19 hours ago, treeofdreams said:

In an earlier episode, after the astrologer scolded Mama Sumit for being a "selfish mother", Mom had that talk with Jenny where she said "We love you".  I didn't believe it at the time, of course, but now her true colors will probably come out when she finds out they are married.  It looks like Sumit will tell her on the Tell All episode.  She may not freak out while on the air, but I hope we get to see her full-out reaction at some point.

Perhaps now that it is a done deed she will surprise us and just be resigned to "the will of the God".

When Jenny and Sumit were feeding the holy men at the temple and Jenny knocked over that one guy's food, and she kept apologizing, did anyone else take that as a bad omen for the marriage?  They were supposed to be there to receive blessings for feeding the men.  Oops.

I kept waiting for the holy men to change her into an animal!!!  LMAO Maybe Sumit was waiting for the same thing!!

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4 hours ago, Polliwollidoodle said:

Well, I often doze off and apparently I did for this episode. I honestly did not see Jenny and Sumit get married. I saw only the preparation and the about to be married and I thought the powers that be were holding it over for the next episode.

I am in shock reading that they did get married- though more than one or two of you has commented questioning if the marriage will be viewed as being proper. (so more to come...)

Be careful what you say!! You could be called as a material witness or something at the annulment hearing when Sumit pulls the old, "But we never really got married" ploy to get out of this one!!!!

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20 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Inheritances are generally considered not to be marital property, and can keep their non-marital property status throughout a marriage, and divorce. 

So here's a tip for all y'all:  If you inherit money during your marriage, it's your separate property.  If you want it to stay that way, have the inheritance put into a new, separate account established solely for that inherited money, and don't ever add anything to it.   The key is maintaining its identity as inherited, separate property, and it's massively easier if it stays there in its own account and never has marital property commingled with it. 

There's no problem with spending that money, except that it reduces this separate property of yours.  But there is a big problem with adding money that could make it impossible to trace the inherited part.

Kenny is far from being a young 'un.

This ^^^

My ex brother-in-law received an inheritance from his father when his father passed.  It wasn't huge but it was sizeable.  He was debating what to do with it (invest, make a large purchase, etc.) and just let it sit in the account earning interest.  

About six months later, he found out my sister was having an affair.  She left him and during the settlement, she tried to lay claim to 50% of his inheritance because she thought she was legally entitled to it and "your parents would have wanted me to have half of it" (as if *eye roll*).

Nope, it turned out because this money was specifically for my BIL and had never been co-mingled with marital/community property assets, my sister was not entitled to a single penny of it.  

As you said, a great tip and something many people may not be aware of.  When my BIL received that inheritance, he had no idea his 20-year marriage was going to go down the crapper in a short 6 months.  What's that saying?  "While we make plans, the Universe laughs."  

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18 hours ago, Mondrianyone said:

So was I. It made me think of that movie Longtime Companion, where in the end all those who'd died of AIDS came back to life on the beach at Fire Island. I could barely breathe for sobbing in the theater. So many friends lost. For once Kenny was weeping with good reason.

Such an excellent movie.  I haven't seen it in ages (at least a decade or more), but I remember crying like a baby at the Fire Island scene at the end.  If anyone hasn't seen it, and if it's available on any of the streaming services, I highly recommend it (make sure you have plenty of Kleenex handy, though.)

Kenny and Armando's wedding was just perfection.  They remain my all-time favorite couple (family) across the 90DF Universe.  

A part of me wants to see them back on HEA...but another part of me wants them to run far away from the TLC dumpster fire to live their lives away from this shit show.  

I hope Corey and Evelin go far, far away, too, but because they're boring and annoying and equally contemptable.  They can crawl back into oblivion any time now and I'll be a happy camper.  

I agree with others on Jenny and Sumbitch.  I don't trust that little weasel and wouldn't be surprised if he's aware of a loophole that makes the ceremony null and void.  That being said, I'm looking forward to seeing Mother Sumbitch's reaction when informed on camera that her baby boy has married the "old lady."  

Regarding Steven and Alina....

Spoiler

Rumor on Reddit by a poster claiming to have dated Steven says Steven is going to be ambushed surprised with a guest from his past.  Sounds like it might be an ex, but according to the Reddit poster, he wasn't expecting this person to be on the show.  This could be an entertaining segment.  

Now to count down to the reunion....

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2 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

He can weasel all he wants.  All you need is a license, signed by the officiant and whatever else the state/country demands.  No words needed.  You can be on your way to the airport to catch a flight and sign off in the TSA line, and as long as the government acknowledges it, you are married.

I am pretty sure what Sumit arranged was a "spiritual wedding" and not the state recognized, signed certificate with the government seal legal wedding.  I don't think Jenny would have serve the government official at the marriage bureau any aloo gobi on a leaf.

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3 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

HA HA HA!  I love it when @Pepper Mostly quotes me!!  I assumed (wrongly) that he was out of college.  Oopsies!  So he is an exterminator, ala Brandon?  And he is ANOTHER aspiring DJ?  Ooof - where are my anti nausea meds?

Oh, I'm just speculating about him being an aspiring DJ, I really have no idea. But I'm prepared to bet a shiny quarter that Steven dreams of a musical career. Remember his, um, song, that he wrote especially to propose to Alina with? He has really long hair and "plays" and "sings", after a fashion. If he isn't a regular at his local open mic nights? Lets just say I'd be surprised. 

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Regarding a Happily Ever After gig...

I would be really interested to see how things go for Steven and Alina.  Will she give him the boot after getting to know him better?  Will she have a fabulous modeling career in Russia, and leave him and his pre-nup (which is probably only written to protect him) in the dust?

Jenny and Sumit - their storyline was all about the struggle to get married.  Now that they are, what is there to tell?  We would see Mama Sumit's displeasure initially, but then...?  Would there continue to be family drama with Jenny still not being accepted?

Corey and Evelin - please no.

Kenny and Armando - there is the adoption/baby question, but I would like to see them move on with their lives and leave this behind.

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I think Armando was saying in Mexico that having a biologically related child is more accepted, no matter how that's accomplished, than an adopted but not biologically related child.  

I'm wondering if Ste-Van actually has some money he'll get access to when he's older?   I went to high school with a lot of trust fund kids, and often the grandparent's trust would pay for college, but nothing else until they hit a certain age.   With Ste-Van's lack of common sense and juvenile behavior I would make a trust fund available to him when he was 90 at least.   

Since Bini and Ari are taking so many photos, and having so many gossip sheet articles, then I bet they either signed for another season, or are trying to.     I bet the second the TLC money stops, that Bini should start packing for home.  

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23 hours ago, Chloe Dog said:

I don't want to defend Ari, but I wonder if there's not a more real reason for why she won't go back to Ethiopia?  When did the civil war start?  Maybe it was too dangerous to go back even just prior to the war?  I totally expect Sharp to push the more entertaining explanation.

I wondered about that, too, and had looked it up recently. Ari came back to the US in August or September (remember her father said Avi was born in January and they hadn't seen him for 8 months?) and stayed about two months. The civil unrest seems to have really heated up in November, so that would coincide with the time she opted to go to Kenya instead. We saw them in Kenya celebrating Avi's first birthday so that must have been last January. I'll bet part of Ari's reluctance to go to Ethiopia is because she sees herself as a beautiful blonde American which would make her a prime target. 

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21 hours ago, Ucross said:
23 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

My memory is a female friend married him on paper so they could get in vitro

Not necessary. I'm single and had in vitro in NYC.

I thought I read that he had a female friend who agreed to try insemination and when that didn't work, she got pregnant both times by IVF. They pretended to be married, but their status was never questioned. However, I've always been suspicious that the "friend" was just someone he paid to be an egg donor, carry the pregnancies to term and afterwards relinquish any claim to the babies. 

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4 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

So he is an exterminator, ala Brandon? 

He's an exterminator with a soft heart and doesn't want to injure or kill bugs. But I think he really wants to be a piano lounge player! 

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1 hour ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Oh, I'm just speculating about him being an aspiring DJ, I really have no idea. But I'm prepared to bet a shiny quarter that Steven dreams of a musical career. Remember his, um, song, that he wrote especially to propose to Alina with? He has really long hair and "plays" and "sings",  "warbles" after a fashion. If he isn't a regular at his local open mic nights? Lets just say I'd be surprised. 

Fixed that for you.

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5 hours ago, Dishin said:

During SteVen and Alina’s vows, the officiant asked basically, if SteVen would be her husband (can’t remember the exact wording) and he replied “ Ochen prevyet”.. um doesn’t that translate to “very hello”? And not “yes”?

I thought the vows were in Turkish and he answered with something that started like "chock..." which I recall Mursel and Anna saying for "very" or "many." 

and btw, welcome back to the snarky fold! 

Edited by magemaud
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On 11/29/2021 at 2:17 PM, Mrs. Hanson said:

My memory is a female friend married him on paper so they could get in vitro and she had a son and then triplets.  I believe she was not involved in bringing them up

They never married, just pretended to be married so the fertility clinic would accept them for IVF.  The plan all along was for Kenny to raise the kids himself.

Quote

Not necessary. I'm single and had in vitro in NYC.

it can vary from clinic to clinic.  Nowadays, I think most fertility clinics don't care, but back 25-30 years ago, when Kenny's kids were being conceived, there were fertility clinics that would only do in vitro for married couples.  

Edited by Rootbeer
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28 minutes ago, magemaud said:

I thought I read that he had a female friend who agreed to try insemination and when that didn't work, she got pregnant both times by IVF. They pretended to be married, but their status was never questioned. However, I've always been suspicious that the "friend" was just someone he paid to be an egg donor, carry the pregnancies to term and afterwards relinquish any claim to the babies. 

I think you are right.  

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