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S13.E02: Houston, We Have a Marriage


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She has more of a voluptuosa body and not like someone who is going to want to spend hours at the gym. Ryan must think he’s pretty hot stuff but he looks like he’s got four kids at home and a mortgage he can’t afford  

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Someone please provide Gil with the divorce papers ASAP! Myrla is shallow and materialistic. Gil isn't risking his life running into fires to buy you designer shoes sweetheart. 

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56 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

Are these bridal shops in Vegas?  All I see are boobs.  Too low cut for a bride.  The looks are trashy. Imo.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who didn't like Myrla, Brett, or Rachel's dresses.   I would have forgiven Myrla if not for the tattoo right between her breasts. That's all I could focus on whenever they showed her.  I'm not tattoo shaming, but she chose a dress where you couldn't help but see it.

My issue with the other titty gowns is that opaque panel used to emphasize the cleavage. I don't like nude illlusion type dresses when the bride's skin doesn't match the fabric.  If you have to show off the tatas, tape the dress to them and leave that film off! There's a fine line between sexy and stripper wear...

Ryan would probably benefit more from grief therapy than a marriage to a stranger. He is traumatized! I'm not sure Brett will be able to pull him out of that particular funk.

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Every season watching this show, I can’t believe that out of thousands of the applicants, the experts choose the couples they choose. I feel that they do this not to help people but to create drama so we have something to talk about.

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57 minutes ago, CSunshine76 said:

Now she doesn’t like dogs. Come on “experts”! What the hell…you can’t put a dog lover with someone who doesn’t like them at all.

 I agree. I had dogs and I don't want them anymore. It's a question they should ask before they match them up. But also after Chris last season, they need to talk to family members re: past relationships, etc.

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Mylar (?) Is so shallow.  She did not want a marriage. She wanted somebody who fitted into her life and led her life.  I don't see her compromising at all. I can understand if she doesn't like to have pets.. But he works as a fireman and will be gone 24 hours at a time, and she will have to take care of it. She either won't do it or she will resent it.

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I am keeping my fingers crossed for Michaela and Zach.  I think they make a cute couple.

The experts need to stop with the "opposites attract" nonsense.  Myrla made it perfectly clear that she didn't want a bald partner and that she isn't a pet lover.  So, they decided it would be a good idea to pair her with a bald man who has a big dog.  Nice.

I have a feeling Rachel is in for a world of hurt with Jose and Ryan won't be attracted to Brett.

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(edited)
18 minutes ago, Kiss my mutt said:

If anyone Is still hanging out, go check out Michaela’s outfit on Unfiltered. 
This makes the wedding dresses look demure. 
Mylra looks like she’s been stress eating. 

Yep. That was an interesting top on "Hurricane K".

Myrla has that "I'm here so I won't get fined" look.

Edited by Stardancer Supreme
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25 minutes ago, antfitz said:

Mylar (?) Is so shallow.  She did not want a marriage. She wanted somebody who fitted into her life and led her life.  I don't see her compromising at all. I can understand if she doesn't like to have pets.. But he works as a fireman and will be gone 24 hours at a time, and she will have to take care of it. She either won't do it or she will resent it.

She wanted an accessory.  He’s already had a few eyebrow raising moments, bet he’s guessed that she’s going to be sky high maintenance.  I hope he takes his puppy to Grandma’s house for the duration!

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2 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

So far I’m liking the tux’s more than the wedding dresses. 
Brett looks like the actress Toni  Collette in her younger years. 

Brett seems like a nice person, and quite sincere...but for some reason she makes me think of Carrot Top :(  Something about her mouth I think...

I feel so bad for Gil.  He is in for a world of hurt.

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Why is Unfiltered on so late now?  I'm not going to watch it until tomorrow.  I am traumatized from all those boobs!  I don't want to see that on someone's wedding day.  Brett's saggy boobs were almost falling out plus her skin tone was not flattered by the color of her gown.  Just YUCK.  I could not BELIEVE the women with her liked it!  What kind of message does that send to a complete stranger you're marrying at first sight?  I somehow feel like they saved the last two weddings for the end because they're the biggest train wrecks, although the two tonight also seem headed in that direction.

How come the experts couldn't figure out that Myrla was going to be disappointed when she heard that Gil was a firefighter but even I knew that last week?  I mean, how obvious could it GET?  Her face fell!  She is materialistic!  Plus the way she acted about his dog was atrocious.  These experts are ridiculous.  This woman is too particular and a diva.  I feel sorry for Gil.

Zach is sweet but almost too sweet.  The way his mother cooed at him when he was tearing up was a little bit of a give away that he's been doted on a lot.  Michaela is just TOO MUCH right out of the gate.  She is going to overwhelm him.  They are very attracted to each other but I feel sorry for him already.

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It’s too early to say for sure, but my $ is on Bao and Johnny. She’ll flip out a few times, he’ll be insecure, but I think they see a future together and here’s hoping they don’t have to work too hard because they fit (hi, Woody and Amari;-)

Sweet Zack. Seems like such a catch, but here he is. Maybe his dates didn’t want to hear about how much he wanted to be married—on their first date.

Sorry, Gil.

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3 hours ago, Straycat80 said:


Rachel seems nice but her dress is not flattering. 

Rachel's dress was my favorite.  I liked it a lot.

2 hours ago, karenbrady said:

I'm surprised Myrla has girlfriends. She's nasty. 

The way she was insulting them! "I don't want my eyebrows/ foundation to look like theirs."

1 hour ago, MyTwoCents said:

I just get a bad feeling about Ryan. It seems like he’s going to be shallow and I don’t think he’s going to be into Brett.

I think Brett is so cute. She looks a lot like her cute little dad 🥰

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Yeah I have never understood people who think cleavage looks good when you can see that the boobs are laying flat down.  Prop them up or cover them up!

Zack and Michaela seemed to be delighted with each other; I think she'll calm down when she's not so nervous.  She's a little much but I like her.

I do not like Myrla.  I felt like I could see a thought bubble over Gil's head saying "Yikes!" a couple of times during their champagne get-together.

I do not like Brett's parents for naming a little baby girl Brett.  Shame on them.  I hope her husband surprises us and is better than he's coming off so far.

I love how Jose managed to squeeze in ye olde "I hope she's attracted to me" after he gave his 3 mile long list of everything he requires 😄

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(edited)
1 hour ago, Yeah No said:

Why is Unfiltered on so late now?  I'm not going to watch it until tomorrow.  I am traumatized from all those boobs! 

Wait until you see Michaela's outfit.  Not that much boob exposure; more like boob adjacent.  Still awful.

 

Quote

Plus the way she acted about his dog was atrocious. 

She can't help it if she doesn't like dogs.  And, a pit bull mix for someone who doesn't like dogs is kind of a lot. 

I wouldn't be surprised if she told the "experts" that she didn't like dogs, and was still reeling from seeing a bald man waiting for her and wondering if they listened to her at all.  I actually thought it was funny when she asked, "Does it slobber?"  How many people have ever used the word "slobber" during their wedding ceremony, especially someone who seems as particular as Myrla?

 

4 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

Brett looks like the actress Toni  Collette in her younger years. 

2 hours ago, Real4real said:

Brett seems like a nice person, and quite sincere...but for some reason she makes me think of Carrot Top :(  Something about her mouth I think...

That's it!  A cross between Toni Collette and Carrot Top!  It's been driving me crazy.

ETA:  A lot of religious people again.  What has happened to church, where you can meet people who you know you probably share values with?  Instead they go on a stupid reality TV show.  I don't get it.

Edited by StatisticalOutlier
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(edited)
1 hour ago, princelina said:

I do not like Brett's parents for naming a little baby girl Brett.  Shame on them. 

Right away, I had the thought that the name Ryan has been used for both  boys and girls.

I've never heard of a female Brett, though. 

 

Edited by ChiCricket
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2 minutes ago, ChiCricket said:

Right away, I had the thought that the name Ryan has been used for both  boys and girls.

I've never heard of a female Brett, though. 

 

Brett Butler is the only one I can think of.

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2 hours ago, zenme said:

Ugh. Myrla is so full of herself! Poor Gil! She doesn’t deserve him.  Did you see when he asked if she trained teachers, she got a snotty tone and said, “Uh, no, I train principals. I was a principal.” Myrla, I bet the people you train think you’re a bitch.

Yes. So much boob I had to take a Lactaid afterwards. 
 

Good lord, this is a nasty woman. The way she was so insulting to her friends-"Make sure my makeup and brows do not look like THEIRS".

Gil seems like such a sweet man.

However, I do think that Myrla asked for a rich man with hair and no dogs....so they gave her the exact opposite.

I think she will not love that she makes much more money than him. 

Mikaela scene with her sisters giving her the Starship Enterprise was truly beautiful.  Her gown actually seemed to fit her breasts and they were not pushed up to her eyebrows.

I enjoyed being able to observe the tea ceremony. I loved Bao's wedding dress and her tea ceremony dress. Johnny also looked handsome.

My favorites so far are  Bao/Johnny and Mikaela/Zack.

No matter how bad the marriages the weddings usually seem fun.  However, Myrla and Gil's wedding felt hella awkward. I think all the guests there realized in 5 seconds that these two will not make a good match.

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3 hours ago, Blissfool said:

Brett Butler is the only one I can think of.

Aging myself, but I used to watch Brett Somers on Match Game way back in the 70’s.  She was married to Jack Klugman.

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9 hours ago, Kiss my mutt said:

Right? But she draws the line on foundation?

Bad for the skin.

If I said I didn't like dogs (it is one's  prerogative) and was matched with the owner of a "pit bull mix" of all things, I'd totally walk off the show. EOS. In fact, I, LennieBriscoe, would. Ain't sleepin' with one eye open, TYVM. 

Never heard of "Ryan" as a girl's name. "Brett," yes. 

Edited by LennieBriscoe
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(edited)
6 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

She can't help it if she doesn't like dogs.  And, a pit bull mix for someone who doesn't like dogs is kind of a lot. 

I wouldn't be surprised if she told the "experts" that she didn't like dogs, and was still reeling from seeing a bald man waiting for her and wondering if they listened to her at all.  I actually thought it was funny when she asked, "Does it slobber?"  How many people have ever used the word "slobber" during their wedding ceremony, especially someone who seems as particular as Myrla?

I know I thought the same thing about the experts matching her with him, but for me it's not even that she doesn't like dogs (I love dogs BTW) but the way she acted about it, which IMO showed zero class.  Asking if it slobbered right there at the altar is one example of that.  Puhleeze, girl just stop with the diva stuff!  Just don't make potentially insulting assumptions like that and blurt them out during your solemn wedding ceremony.  She is entitled not to like them but IMO being disrespectful of her groom AND the dog reflects poorly on her.  Dogs have feelings, they are highly evolved creatures, and acting that way about them is IMO ignorant and classless.  This is a creature her groom loves.  Have some respect.  That's like asking him at the altar if his sister or his best friend slobbers.  My friend owned a Pit years ago and I never once saw it slobber.  She needs to get a clue.

Edited by Yeah No
oops, typo.
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5 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

What has happened to church, where you can meet people who you know you probably share values with?  Instead they go on a stupid reality TV show.  I don't get it.

Speaking from experience, most of the people at church are already married or in relationships.

Myrla does come off as high maintenance, but that might be just bravado and nerves. I'm going to see how she actually treats Gil before judging her. I hope she remembers that it's not Gil's fault that the matchmakers didn't listen to her. Maybe they should have asked basic questions about pet ownership and finances before searching her underwear drawer.

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4 hours ago, qtpye said:

Mikaela scene with her sisters giving her the Starship Enterprise was truly beautiful.  Her gown actually seemed to fit her breasts and they were not pushed up to her eyebrows.

I know that got me in the feels.  When she said her Dad might have done that I thought my own Dad might have done something like that too, and having lost him last year that stung.  He used to give me little model cars.  My Dad was kind of a nerd too in the best possible way.  I think that means she may like Zach because he's a little bit nerdy himself.  Except he is way introverted compared to her.  My Dad was an extrovert.  I hope Zach likes her but I worry that she may be too overbearing for him.  I guess we'll see, she may tone it down when they get past the ceremony.  At least they both seem like nice people so far.

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The show finally hired some good makeup and hair people and Myrla is a snot to them and doesn’t let them do their job.  Sheesh.  Mikaela and her sisters looked gorgeous!  Loved how they all looked complimentary and not bridesmaid matchy-matchy.  

I have a crush on Gil and feel bad for what he’s about to have to put up with for the next 8 weeks.  Myrla is a real pill.

WTF with the black glitter tux jacket Jose tried on.  Looked like it was made out of wrapping paper.

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9 hours ago, Stardancer Supreme said:

I'm glad I'm not the only one who didn't like Myrla, Brett, or Rachel's dresses.   I would have forgiven Myrla if not for the tattoo right between her breasts. That's all I could focus on whenever they showed her.  I'm not tattoo shaming, but she chose a dress where you couldn't help but see it.

I'm  having a hard time believing anyone would want to dress like that in a wedding gown.  Is that really how they want to be remembered at their weddings and look in the photos? 

At first I thought it was a clip on the dress for the hanger when Myrla was trying it on. Then I realized it was the heart shaped tattoo.  Her dress actually could have been pretty with fabric added from the waist up. I hated the selves that looked like short selves.  It was all a mess. Then along came Brett's dress..... 

Just when Bao's dress couldn't get anymore beautiful, it did!

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10 hours ago, Stardancer Supreme said:

I'm glad I'm not the only one who didn't like Myrla, Brett, or Rachel's dresses

I didn't like them either. Brett needed something she could wear a bra with (her dress was backless; I guess she could have worn a backless bra, but regardless, she needed a bra), I just thought Myrla's was tacky, period (I preferred the strapless one she tried), and Rachel's would have been better on a taller bride - the proportions didn't flatter her.

36 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

I know that got me in the feels.  When she said her Dad might have done that I thought my own Dad might have done something like that too, and having lost him last year that stung.

That moment when Michaela opened the box and immediately got emotional and slammed it shut because she knew what it was and what it meant was really moving to me, as someone who lost her father not long ago. Michaela is a little extra (when she got up to the altar and was all "HI I'M MICHAELA YOU'RE ZACH DO YOU WANT KIDS?" I wanted her to just take several deep breaths and stop talking) but I love her sisters. I thought Zach's vows were very sweet.

I am not sure Myrla's friends actually like her. One of them said something during the getting-ready process that was basically "I know how shallow you are so I hope you'll be able to get past it" and the "what her friends and family want you to know" bit didn't make her look good at all - wearing designer clothes to a clothing drive is an asshole move that they specifically called out.

The first suit Gil tried on was giving deacon vibes! He looked much better in the one he chose.

6 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

She can't help it if she doesn't like dogs.  And, a pit bull mix for someone who doesn't like dogs is kind of a lot. 

They did this with Miami Sonia - she was afraid of dogs, having seen someone get mauled by dogs when she was a kid, and they paired her with someone who had two. She made a really valiant effort with them (worked with a trainer, etc.) but she shouldn't have been put in that position. It's really annoying that they do that.

I already don't see it for Rachel and Jose. When Pastor Cal said they both want to compromise I was like "Jose, who has his life meticulously planned out and wants someone 'on his level?'"

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(edited)
14 hours ago, karenbrady said:

Lol...this woman really thinks she's Jlo. Look at that dress she's marrying a stranger in. Smh.

Which one? Myrla, Brett or Rachel?  All of them were thinking they were JLo.

Did they think these weddings were at the Playboy Mansion?

 

Edited by Rightside
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12 hours ago, karenbrady said:

Lol...this woman really thinks she's Jlo. Look at that dress she's marrying a stranger in. Smh.

And as she tries it on, she says she's looking for someone to pray with.

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(edited)

Unfiltered: Mylar, Bao, Michaela (love, love her Donna Summer “Last Dance” look)

A scrap of a torn down volleyball net…an unfinished Macrame project…attacked by a tiger on the way to the studio…

What is….Michaela’s top.

The Tits McGee Bridal Gown Collection….Your tatas will headlight your way down the aisle….

The heart tattoo under Mylar’s inflatables was not classy and betrays the rest of her carefully burnished look.

Of course Mylar had to have a specific gown and needed to call all over Houston until she got exactly what she wanted. 
She said all she needed was her perfect dress and didn’t care about the rest of the wedding.
How perfectly narcissistic and spoilt of her Highness.

Mylar came dressed to the studio ready to change the oil on the other brides’ car after the shoot. What she wore was a form of protest.

Mylar took Cal to task…no bald men, no dogs…shit job once again, “experts”

Bao said she was put at ease when her parents were won over by Johnny, with her Dad the happiest person in the reception ballroom.

You can tell production crew hates JamieO…the cut away shots makes her legs look like sides of marbled beef with the lighting making them ghastly pale and huge.

Edited by humbleopinion
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11 hours ago, CSunshine76 said:

I really cannot wrap my head around the reason for this match.  They are complete opposites…it’s not going to be good.

Yeah, and I loved when he said he won’t have sex right away as he doesn’t love her yet.  He wants to when there’s something meaningful between them.  I agree with that.  What a great guy!  He’s too good for her and very sensitive.

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Mylar doesn’t care the fallout when she is vocal and surgically precise in what she expects and wants.

She has long since reconciled with herself that she is willing to come off as a bitch on wheels to get and have what she wants and deserves.

Unfortunately for Gil she is very “one minded.” Her way or the highway…Bye puppy…

When Gil was blasphemous about Prada and Gucci, Mylar visibly flinched when Gil spoke the designers’ names in vain….

 

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12 hours ago, Kiss my mutt said:

From those vows, sounds like she wants to be a kept woman. Does she work?

She’s already a sourpuss about his dog. 

I was surprised when she told him she’s some big shot in education administration or something.

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13 hours ago, Myrtle Urkele said:

I'm going to try and watch this new season. The last one was so terrible that it almost turned me off from MAFS ngl

Me too.  One question ..does everyone here like Couples Cam?  I’m getting a little tired of seeing Anthony & Ashley taking videos of every little thing they do.  Jamie and Doug problems too.  It’s worse than watching someone’s home movies.  Maybe one show once a year would be enough.

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10 hours ago, Real4real said:

She wanted an accessory.  He’s already had a few eyebrow raising moments, bet he’s guessed that she’s going to be sky high maintenance.  I hope he takes his puppy to Grandma’s house for the duration!

I think HE should stay in Grandma's house for the duration too.  She's way too materialistic and thinks she's a lot hotter than she is.

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46 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

Unfiltered: Mylar, Bao, Michaela (love, love her Donna Summer “Last Dance” look)

A scrap of a torn down volleyball net…an unfinished Macrame project…attacked by a tiger on the way to the studio…

What is….Michaela’s top.

The Tits McGee Bridal Gown Collection….Your tatas will headlight your way down the aisle….

The heart tattoo under Mylar’s inflatables was not classy and betrays the rest of her carefully burnished look.

Mylar came dressed to the studio ready to change the oil on the other brides’ car after the shoot. What she wore was a form of protest.

Mylar took Cal to task…no bald men, no dogs…shit job once again, “experts”

Bao said she was put at ease when her parents were won over by Johnny, with her Dad the happiest person in the reception ballroom.

You can tell production crew hates JamieO…the cut away shots makes her legs look like sides of marbled beef with the lighting making them ghastly pale and huge.

Who dresses this woman?  Skirts up to her who- ha, unflattering tops that make her arms twice their size.  We should take a collection for a new pair of shoes.  Although they are pulling in more money than us.

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1 minute ago, cinsays said:

I think HE should stay in Grandma's house for the duration too.  She's way too materialistic and thinks she's a lot hotter than she is.

Look, I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with those things. I enjoy those things, but Myrla is an asshole, plain and simple. She’s rude and self-centered. Her tone I rude and when Gil complimented her, she couldn’t be bothered to say something nice back. Her attitude at her bachelorette party was stank. The shade to her friends about not wanting to look like them! That was mean! It’s clear she’d been poor is now trying to prove she’s worth it now. Her enjoyment of nice things is more about validating herself. I just feel bad for Gil. 

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16 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

Me too.  One question ..does everyone here like Couples Cam?  I’m getting a little tired of seeing Anthony & Ashley taking videos of every little thing they do.  Jamie and Doug problems too.  It’s worse than watching someone’s home movies.  Maybe one show once a year would be enough.

Nope, I can't stand that show. Enough with pushing Jamie on us!

And why do the commercials show Virginia and Erik or are the rumors about them splitting not true?

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3 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I know I thought the same thing about the experts matching her with him, but for me it's not even that she doesn't like dogs (I love dogs BTW) but the way she acted about it, which IMO showed zero class.  Asking if it slobbered right there at the altar is one example of that.  Puhleeze, girl just stop with the diva stuff!  Just don't make potentially insulting assumptions like that and blurt them out during your solemn wedding ceremony.  She is entitled not to like them but IMO being disrespectful of her groom AND the dog reflects poorly on her.  Dogs have feelings, they are highly evolved creatures, and acting that way about them is IMO ignorant and classless.  This is a creature her groom loves.  Have some respect.  That's like asking him at the altar if his sister or his best friend slobbers.  My friend owned a Pit years ago and I never once saw it slobber.  She needs to get a clue.

 

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(edited)

Zack and Johnny are the most emo grooms….luckily their brides are dried eyed and have their backs…so far.

Anybody else having a hard time understanding Zack’s mush mouth and rat tat tat speaking cadence?

Birds of a feather…

Bao’s and Johnny’s unspoken mutual desire that their parents’ and families’ find happiness about their marriage is crucial to their success in this very unorthodox situation.

The double secret requests for a tea ceremony with awesome custom wedding wardrobe just enhanced their chances for staying married.

Production did a good job to hire the right vendor to stage the tea ceremony which was visually better than Bennett mouthing eggs swinging on a string…

You can feel Bao’s defensive walls dropping as she relaxes when she sees how much her parents love Johnny at first sight and his being able to speak to them in Vietnamese (assuming he speaks it along with Mandarin) is comfy cosy.
Their acceptance of him is so very important to her.

Love, love that Bao is diametrically opposite to Me Me Mylar.

Update: The officiant is a friend of Bao’s who must have helped MAFS production with the Viet tea ceremony. Johnny requested a Chinese tea ceremony but happy with the Vietnamese ceremony. The officiant must have signed a NDA contract.

 

Edited by humbleopinion
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2 hours ago, Booger666 said:

The show finally hired some good makeup and hair people and Myrla is a snot to them and doesn’t let them do their job.  Sheesh.  Mikaela and her sisters looked gorgeous!  Loved how they all looked complimentary and not bridesmaid matchy-matchy.  

Michaela looked like a different person after hair and makeup!!

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11 hours ago, MyTwoCents said:

I just get a bad feeling about Ryan. It seems like he’s going to be shallow and I don’t think he’s going to be into Brett.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed on this guy.  I don't get "shallow" from him but right now he's very hard to read.  I did find it interesting that he emphasized that the most important quality he wanted from his new bride is that she be a nice person.  When have we ever heard that from anybody?  And the fact he didn't qualify that statement with a laundry list of women he's dated that were anything but nice is definitely a plus. 

There's no reason he won't be attracted to Brett.  She's very cute.  But will she be attracted to him?  My biggest fear is that he is getting into this for the wrong reason.  No....he's not like 99.9% of the MAFS who sign up because they want to break into show biz or at least think it would be cool to be on TV.  I mean look at him....he's a schlep.  No, I'm worried he signed up due to the death of his friend.  I mean, was it a sudden death?  That shock of getting a phone call out of the blue can completely upend someone's life...sometimes for years.  If the person was similar in age as you, it can put you in a deep funk and have you questioning the meaning of everything.  It can also propel you to sign up to marry a stranger because you just got a cold splash of reality in your face that life is short and you are afraid of being alone. 

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