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S02.E09: Panic on a Tack

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Episode the Ninth, in which things may or may not happen.  

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The deck team springs into action when a surge of wind pushes Parsifal toward the dock; Dani has a panic attack while under sail; Colin receives heartbreaking news from home; Alli feels the pressure to address Sydney's dirty laundry.

Airdate 04.26.2021

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Apparently Dani has a thing for big, tall, lazy fucking dorks, 🤷🏻‍♂️
 

I feel bad for Colin losing his dog. 😟

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J.L. Instead of "Jean Luc," maybe change it to "just lounging" or "just lunching." Soon, it may stand for "job loss." So many possibilities. I hope Dani is smarter about protection than it's appearing as. Sad about her guy friend getting killed. 😢 Also though I hate to admit Gary was right about not ever saying "no we can't" to guests. Find a way to serve shots safely or say "yes" in the moment & serve after heeling. Or explain "we'll be right out with it as soon as safe. "

I've come to realize Sydney never ever looks the same twice.  Every scene, every angle,  she's a different person IMO.  & each time I post, i have to look up her name as I can never remember it. She's still annoying.  Glad Alli confronted her but of course she back pedaled as she was sober & alone w/ Alli.

Glenn was funny with his crack about being hungover "oh no, that's you guys! "Lol loved it.  

Sad Collin lost his doggy. If I heard right,  the dog was two? It must've been really sick from before the rescue. 

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I’m sure I’m mistaken, but I thought I saw a big purple vibrator next to Ally’s bed. 

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Oh how I long for this latest Below Deck incarnation to be over. 

To get back to regular Below Deck. 

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4 hours ago, AryasMum said:

I’m sure I’m mistaken, but I thought I saw a big purple vibrator next to Ally’s bed. 

Don't be hating on vibrators or the women who have one. We all like an orgasm.

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2 hours ago, nokat said:

Don't be hating on vibrators or the women who have one. We all like an orgasm.

But in a shared cabin???

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    I’m surprised Capt Glenn was pretty chill about not having any clean underwear left. We can imagine how the other Captains would have been when they would even just have on pair left. 
    The guests seemed to enjoy their gourmet meal, but I didn’t think that first appetizer looked too appealing. I don’t think the male primary did either until he tasted it. 

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4 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

But in a shared cabin???

I think they sleep at different hours. I wouldn't leave one out.

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11 hours ago, AryasMum said:

I’m sure I’m mistaken, but I thought I saw a big purple vibrator next to Ally’s bed. 

It is a water bottle.....

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6 hours ago, nokat said:

Don't be hating on vibrators or the women who have one. We all like an orgasm.

Oh no doubt, but I had a giggle over the absolute unconcern that the world see it laying there. Shades of Sonja Morgan. 

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10 minutes ago, Genus said:

It is a water bottle.....

Ha!  Well that makes sense. Maybe Sonja influenced me with her frequent vibrator handling.  There happened to be some type of charger sitting with it, so I leapt to conclusions. 

Edited by AryasMum
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JL comparing himself to a man and Gary to a short ... Frodo ...

😂😂😂😂😂😂 OMG, that was hilarious!

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Bummer about Colin's dog.

Can Disco please stay dead?

Natasha finally gets one right.  No eggs were ruined tonight.

Gary gets more gross every week.  I can see Sydney boiling a bunny.

These boatmances are getting ever more tiresome.

The castle is cool, but probably more trouble than it's worth.

No JL, you take the water - now! - and reheat dinner when you get back.  Dumbass.

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4 hours ago, Mindthinkr said:

    I’m surprised Capt Glenn was pretty chill about not having any clean underwear left. We can imagine how the other Captains would have been when they would even just have on pair left. 
    The guests seemed to enjoy their gourmet meal, but I didn’t think that first appetizer looked too appealing. I don’t think the male primary did either until he tasted it. 

I didn't understand that whole dinner - Natasha described their meat course as the "third" or "final" course of the meal.  An amuse bouche is usually not considered part of a coursed meal, so these guests only had a two course meal*, a one-bite something, and no dessert! If I'm on an upscale yacht of ANY kind, I am going to want dessert - the more decadant the better!!!  And NO....I do NOT want a bunch of syrups/sauces flung all over butcher paper and me have to scrape it into a cup to eat with some measly fruit!!!!  At least scoop some ice cream into martini glasses, for God's sake!!  

*Not to be entirely picky, but those steaks/filets did not look like they were properly seared, either.  Did Natasha say they were Wagyu?  What a waste of excellent beef!!!  

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3 hours ago, njbchlover said:

*Not to be entirely picky, but those steaks/filets did not look like they were properly seared, either.  Did Natasha say they were Wagyu?  What a waste of excellent beef!!! 

Thank you for mentioning this. Wagyu prepared that way? I occasionally get a grass fed steak and it is seared in cast iron and medium rare.

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I’m hoping that there were five courses, but they didn’t show them all?  I’ve never seen Wagyu that was cut that thin...

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Anyone else see the shot of the broom on the galley counter? Ew.  It had been on the floor and now it's on the counter where food is prepared.  Just ew.

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So in previews, JL said something about getting chlamydia again.

Dani may still forgive him if he gave her the clap.  She seems to be getting over a huge loss so she fell for the tall dork who gave her attention.

Looks like the demanding food critic had very little to say except "mmm"?

It looked great from top of that castle but they keep doing that on BD shows, a meal of some kind where they have to schlep a lot of stuff up narrow and steep stairs.  I recall it in Italy on Ischia.

The charter guests didn't ask for that or ask to dress up in hot and humid weather and climb all those stairs.  Hell they were talking about wanting to get into air conditioning while they were arriving at the boat.

Really obvious now the preference sheets or some of these party ideas are all from producers.

Find ways to stress the cast, which in this case includes both the crew and charter guests and there's going to be watergate about JL not bringing water immediately or the guests suffering in the heat while the water was delayed.

I don't know what the ratings are like this season but they're planning more spinoffs of these and I guess the obviousness of the formula haven't kept viewers from watching all of them.

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I really enjoyed several parts of this episode. As I mentioned above, JL’s seeing himself a man and Gary’s a ... short ... Frodo(still cracks me up). I was impressed to see Allie being an adult and speaking to Sidney while sober. Sidney wimped out and backpedaled earning zero points in my book. Coward.

I didn’t “enjoy” seeing Colin lose his dog nor Dani’s little breakdown but they highlight the sacrifices this lifestyle requires. When I first started watching BD I was struck by the glamorous aspects. The gorgeous locales, the fast money, etc. The “Work hard, play harder” ethic would have appealed to me in my early 20’s, but we got a peek into the sadder, not so great side of the job.

I agreed with Gary, wondering about the history of that “castle”. I would called it a fortress and it looked like it was built to withstand an attack! 

JL kept me very entertained this episode. His comments to the camera, his cluelessness about the quality of his work product, and that he needs to show some hustle keep me either disgusted with him or laughing at him. 

His comment in the previews about an STD while covering his face with his hands had me laughing out loud.  What a numbskull!! Add in that he thinks he’s a great worker! 😂😂😂

Gary has got to lay it out for him, not expect JL to watch and learn, because JL thinks he’s doing a great job(!) I don’t think it will help though, some people never pull their weight and I think JL’s one of those people.
Gary needs to be straight with Sidney too. He waffles too much when he should be direct.
 

 

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Someone mentioned last week Natasha never serving vegetables, and now that's all I can see! Her plates are not complete. And what was the cream cheese on a stick thing she served them when they came on board? Did she seriously serve them one apiece? That's A) ridiculous and B) not worth the effort of making them. 

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27 minutes ago, lcarolynl said:

He waffles too much when he should be direct.

No, he eats all the waffles 😂

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19 hours ago, PaperTree said:

Bummer about Colin's dog.

Can Disco please stay dead?

Natasha finally gets one right.  No eggs were ruined tonight.

Gary gets more gross every week.  I can see Sydney boiling a bunny.

These boatmances are getting ever more tiresome.

The castle is cool, but probably more trouble than it's worth.

No JL, you take the water - now! - and reheat dinner when you get back.  Dumbass.

As if Colin wasn't already hunky and sexy enough, now to see how much he loved his dog and how much pain he is going through over the pup's death, as well as how lovingly he speaks to his girlfriend, he's now irresistible given all of those additional soulful qualities that go way beyond mere good looks and appearance.

I don't know WTF kind of "disco" they were playing, but it certainly was not the awesome disco from the original disco era.  It sounded more like rave music, which they tried to discofy with those tacky decorations and stupid costumes.  That tinsel-like hair was stupid and ridiculous.  That in no way translated to "disco".

I completely agree about the castle not being worth the effort (they've done this before with other so-called scenic settings that were more trouble than they were worth).  And just like when they were previously dining on the boat at the dock with their backs to the most scenic parts of that episode (wasn't that when Barrie's family was on the show?), again here they're all sitting with their backs to the views.  Just another repeat of stupid table setting and viewability.  What a waste of ambience.

Wolverine JL is the biggest (literally and figuratively) waste of space on this yacht.  Lazy, incompetent, impertinent, disillusioned in overestimating his value as part of the crew, NOT a team player in any way, shape or form, with an inflated sense of self-worth.  And those are his best qualities, LOL.  I'm flummoxed that Dani is that desperate into him.  She clearly is seeing a side of him that no one else is, or she is using him as an avoidance technique so as to not have to deal with the loss of her best friend and her depression about being so old (geez, I'd give anything to be 32 again).

Sidney [SP] is definitely bunny boiler material.  She's such a phony, hypocritical piece of s***.  It's such a shame, because she's extremely competent with regards to her deck duties.  She's a team player with regards to helping other crew members out, e.g. the interior, even though they're not in her department.  I can totally see her eventually captaining her own boat/yacht.  But with regards to her personal life, she's shown herself to be two-faced, hypocritical, delusional and unbalanced.  If you're going to trash talk a fellow crew member, man up and do so to them rather than about them behind their backs.  It's not Allie's [SP] fault that Gary is more into her than Sidney.  And in all honesty, I don't think that's because she's any more attractive than Sidney thinks herself to be.  I think Gary's enamored of Allie because she's hard to get, and he's enjoying the chase.  Even though I find him disgusting, I can see where young girls would find him attractive and desirable.  He also can certainly turn on the charm.  He also reminds me of the Seinfeld "Two Face Girlfriend" episode where he sometimes is good looking, and at other times repulsive looking.

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14 hours ago, Rambunctiouscurls said:

How come no one ever invites the nicest captain in BD history to dinner? 😂

Truth be told, most of them find it tiresome and view it as just another necessary part of the job to keep the clients happy. They would much rather be free to unwind and catch up on personal stuff. 

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20 hours ago, njbchlover said:

I didn't understand that whole dinner - Natasha described their meat course as the "third" or "final" course of the meal.  An amuse bouche is usually not considered part of a coursed meal, so these guests only had a two course meal*, a one-bite something, and no dessert!

They must not have shown some courses, right?-- but she DID call the amuse the "first course" and that should not count! And if definitely seemed that there was no dessert. I'd be disappointed.

On 4/27/2021 at 1:14 AM, AryasMum said:

I’m sure I’m mistaken, but I thought I saw a big purple vibrator next to Ally’s bed

that would be a big freakin' vibrator....

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Let me get this right. Someone was using a big purple water bottle as a vibrator?

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48 minutes ago, Mr. Miner said:

Let me get this right. Someone was using a big purple water bottle as a vibrator?

That reminds of an old joke about a vibrator store. A new salesperson left alone able is able to sell larger and larger dildos.

Finally he sells a HUGE, plaid dildo. Customer is happy, the store is happy 

when the owner comes back he is impressed with the sales made in his absence.

The new sales associate bragged, “And I sold the thermos!”

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On 4/27/2021 at 11:59 AM, PaperTree said:

Bummer about Colin's dog.

Can Disco please stay dead?

Natasha finally gets one right.  No eggs were ruined tonight.

Gary gets more gross every week.  I can see Sydney boiling a bunny.

These boatmances are getting ever more tiresome.

The castle is cool, but probably more trouble than it's worth.

No JL, you take the water - now! - and reheat dinner when you get back.  Dumbass.

JL should have his tip docked he’s such an ass.

Edited by endure
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5 hours ago, endure said:

JL should have his tip docked he’s such an ass

I could not believe in a SERVICE JOB he prioritized his lunch over getting water to their guests!

And it took me until now to realize the title of this episode was "Panic on a TACK." I kept reading it as "Panic on a TRACK" and could not figure it out.

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12 minutes ago, dleighg said:

And it took me until now to realize the title of this episode was "Panic on a TACK." I kept reading it as "Panic on a TRACK" and could not figure it out.

I still don't get it

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36 minutes ago, lcarolynl said:

I still don't get it

In sailing, tacking means you move the boat in a zig zag pattern to catch the wind in the sails.

I read it as "track" too.

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3 hours ago, dleighg said:

And it took me until now to realize the title of this episode was "Panic on a TACK." I kept reading it as "Panic on a TRACK" and could not figure it out.

I will confess - I either typed it wrong before or Bravo changed it in their episode descriptions!  I changed it yesterday after checking to see if the next episode description was live yet. 

I also thought OH!  That make more sense.

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Ok, I have the same first name as Colin’s GF, and my nickname is his dog’s name.  It was a little weird, I’ll confess.

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