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S22.E08: Amber

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Teenage hockey player Amber has an on-ice collision, benching her for good and forcing her to live with chronic pain; surgery improves her underlying injury, but leaves her with a dependence on pain medication.

Original air date 2021.04.26

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There was something incredibly telling about the relationship between Amber and Olivia and particularly Olivia and her mother when Olivia was like, "Shouldn't I be praised for helping someone out" which is an issue I wish they had dug into more.

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Amber looked stoned to me in her treatment follow-up. Her eyes were very glazed. Maybe she was just tearful but I doubt it.

And I didn’t hear any way of addressing her pain aside from the meditation. If they just expected her to go off morphine and meditate instead, that sounds like a big fail. I’m not surprised she relapsed. 

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7 hours ago, BloggerAloud said:

There was something incredibly telling about the relationship between Amber and Olivia and particularly Olivia and her mother when Olivia was like, "Shouldn't I be praised for helping someone out" which is an issue I wish they had dug into more.

Olivia's mom was fucking through, and I don't blame her. It would be one thing if Amber was stealing just from Olivia - that's bad enough on its own. When Olivia said her mother hadn't been able to let go of the fact that Amber had stolen from her, I was like "Why should she?" I loved when Amber's mother was like "She's sick of Amber's shit. I get it." And I also liked when Olivia's mother was like "I understand that you're an addict [when Olivia said something about sober people not understanding addiction], but you stole from me and you have to go."

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I totally get where Olivia's mom is coming from and she's actually the only one in that group who really set any sort of boundaries. 

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So my DVR cut off at the end.  Did Amber  relapse and is she with Olivia? 
 

My honest opinion is that Olivia’s ex- husband should have sued Olivia for custody since Olivia was harboring an addict in her home who was stealing money.  Possibly enough money that she was getting deep enough into the checking account to get into the child support money.   She was definitely stealing mortgage money.

Even worse, the kids were refusing to come of  their rooms at one point during the show while Amber was there.

Olivia was delusional.  She acted more like Amber’s mother than her girlfriend 

 

Edited by mythoughtis
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9 minutes ago, mythoughtis said:

So my DVR cut off at the end.  Did Amber  relapse and is she with Olivia?

Amber relapsed, and Olivia and her mom took up the show on an offer to get treatment/counseling together. They did not address the current state of relationships that I recall.

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18 hours ago, mythoughtis said:

So my DVR cut off at the end.  Did Amber  relapse and is she with Olivia? 
 

My honest opinion is that Olivia’s ex- husband should have sued Olivia for custody since Olivia was harboring an addict in her home who was stealing money.  Possibly enough money that she was getting deep enough into the checking account to get into the child support money.   She was definitely stealing mortgage money.

Even worse, the kids were refusing to come of  their rooms at one point during the show while Amber was there.

Olivia was delusional.  She acted more like Amber’s mother than her girlfriend 

 

I just could not understand that dynamic.  The ex told Amber he loved her when he was hugging her before she left for the rehab.  He said it first too; it was unprompted.  While I guess Amber isn't a bad person aside from the stealing, I just don't understand how the ex got so close to her and full of love. Something just ain't right. Or a lot of somethings are missing.

As soon as they mentioned the kids not coming out of their rooms, I was completely done with Amber, Olivia, and the ex.  Terrible, terrible parenting.  Those poor kids. But yet Olivia will coddle Amber to death and wait for everyone to give her kudos. 

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Olivia was delusional.

Olivia enraged me. That idiot sits there, ignoring the theft and threat to her mother and children, thinking her curly blonde locks and teary blue eyes will let her get away with her despicable behavior.

And I think several of them live for the drama.

I wonder if Amber's pain is as bad as she claims. Maybe it's become an excuse. I recall a woman with RA who used pain meds, yet during her treatment the staff was able to help her treat the pain in a healthy way.

Edited by pasdetrois
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1 hour ago, pasdetrois said:

Olivia enraged me. That idiot sits there, ignoring the theft and threat to her mother and children, thinking her curly blonde locks and teary blue eyes will let her get away with her despicable behavior.

You forgot to mention  the huge nose ring.  She wanted you to know she’s way too young and hip to be the mother of six children. 

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What choice does Amber have, chronic pain or addiction?  What a sad state of affairs. 

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On 4/29/2021 at 10:06 PM, pasdetrois said:

Olivia enraged me. That idiot sits there, ignoring the theft and threat to her mother and children, thinking her curly blonde locks and teary blue eyes will let her get away with her despicable behavior.

And I think several of them live for the drama.

This. I was infuriated by Olivia’s anger at her mom kicking Amber out. If she wants to let Amber steal from her, go on binders with her money and set a bad example for her children that’s on her, but her mom does NOT have to put up with that craziness. And honestly I think if Amber truly got clean and maintained a life of sobriety, would Olivia even stick around? She was so entrenched in the drama and her savior complex I don’t know that she, deep down, even wants a sober Amber. 

Like others, I couldn’t understand why the ex-husband was okay with his kids being subjected to that environment. Makes me wonder if both he (and perhaps even Olivia) have their own vices. I feel terrible for those children because even though Olivia claimed she’d end the relationship if Amber didn’t get help, I don’t see that happening. 
 

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I wonder if Amber's pain is as bad as she claims. Maybe it's become an excuse. I recall a woman with RA who used pain meds, yet during her treatment the staff was able to help her treat the pain in a healthy way.

18 hours ago, suzeecat said:

What choice does Amber have, chronic pain or addiction?  What a sad state of affairs. 

I don’t think Amber is in as much pain as she claims. Maybe in the beginning before the cyst was found and removed but I question it now. She stated that she got off the drugs etc. for a year but then relapsed when the pain got to be too much. If the pain was truly that bad I find it hard to believe that she would’ve been able to remain clean for a year. I think she may be using the accident as an excuse for her addiction. 

Lastly, her confessionals while in treatment didn’t have any conviction whatsoever. So I was not surprised when it was revealed she relapsed. 

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I know someone that has vertebrae issues and had a cyst removed.  She had to go back for surgery a few years later because the vertebrae above that area was slipping into the space left from the cyst removal.  So now she has pins and screws there, and arthritis of the spine in addition to other issues.  She does have a lot of pain and is on disability from work, but was denied social security disability. 

She doesn’t take illegal drugs for it.  She does go to a pain clinic and get prescription drugs.   Even with those she can’t do a lot ( a lot is defined as running an  errand and a doctor visit) without laying down, and she can’t stay in one position when awake for more than 30 minutes or so.  So Ambers pain might be valid.... but I don’t think it’s why she continues to use illegal drugs. 

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On 4/27/2021 at 3:10 PM, Empress1 said:

Olivia's mom was fucking through, and I don't blame her. It would be one thing if Amber was stealing just from Olivia - that's bad enough on its own. When Olivia said her mother hadn't been able to let go of the fact that Amber had stolen from her, I was like "Why should she?" I loved when Amber's mother was like "She's sick of Amber's shit. I get it." And I also liked when Olivia's mother was like "I understand that you're an addict [when Olivia said something about sober people not understanding addiction], but you stole from me and you have to go."

I was literally screaming at my the exact things you thought! Lol

 

 

 

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On 4/27/2021 at 2:26 PM, Pandora said:

Amber looked stoned to me in her treatment follow-up. Her eyes were very glazed. Maybe she was just tearful but I doubt it.

 

On 5/1/2021 at 9:23 AM, Enero said:

Lastly, her confessionals while in treatment didn’t have any conviction whatsoever. So I was not surprised when it was revealed she relapsed. 

She seemed totally out of it during her 90-days later confessional. I don't think she was using at that time, as she was still at the rehab, but I think they had her on multiple drugs to attempt to deal with her pain without narcotics. And probably some psychiatric drugs/sleeping meds to boot. She seemed more like a med zombie and looked pretty miserable. I don't think the medication management was where it needed to be, and she should have stayed at the rehab until they got that to a stable and tenable place. As it was, it did not surprise me at all that she went back to her own treatment plan of morphine and coke, which she said made her feel sparkly and "brilliant." 

Not sure what was going on with that ex-husband. He seemed WAY TO COOL with he ex-wife housing an addict who steals. I mean, he did not have a negative word to say and seemed to adore Amber as much as Olivia did. I was thinking maybe they had some kind of throuple going on or something! I couldn't figure out why he would make his ex-wife's new lover a priority over his kids! 

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