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S11.E07: Old Feuds Never Die

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6 hours ago, Marley said:

Marge sucks so bad. She does emasculate her husband. Also stop trying to trash Jen re her and Bill. Yea he makes the majority of the money but I wouldn’t call him her sugar daddy. I don’t usually say it but Marge is jealous about all things Jennifer. 

Yeah, I don't get the attack on Jen for Bill's success and their subsequent lifestyle.  Melissa didn't work for years and screeched about a gold rolex, teresa didn't work for years, jackie isn't exactly churning out the columns these days, and we watched 2 seasons of divorced Dolores letting Frank pay her way.  

At least Bill is legit as far as we know.  He can explain what he does beyond "working!" or "business!", nobody has gone to jail, been disbarred, etc. 

Jennifer gives plenty of reasons to dislike her if you are looking for them.  Being the wife of a successful plastic surgeon shouldn't be one of them.  Especially considering how many women in this area sit alone in ugly mcmansions while their husbands go to work and their nannies cart the kids everywhere because they are too exhausted from getting their nails done, powerwalking and doing tiktok videos.  No I am not joking. If she is going to ride Jen for her husband's success then she should be hating on a lot of people in the area, and probably a majority of her social circle.   

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1 hour ago, BrindaWalsh said:

Yeah, I don't get the attack on Jen for Bill's success and their subsequent lifestyle.  Melissa didn't work for years and screeched about a gold rolex, teresa didn't work for years, jackie isn't exactly churning out the columns these days, and we watched 2 seasons of divorced Dolores letting Frank pay her way.  

At least Bill is legit as far as we know.  He can explain what he does beyond "working!" or "business!", nobody has gone to jail, been disbarred, etc. 

Jennifer gives plenty of reasons to dislike her if you are looking for them.  Being the wife of a successful plastic surgeon shouldn't be one of them.  Especially considering how many women in this area sit alone in ugly mcmansions while their husbands go to work and their nannies cart the kids everywhere because they are too exhausted from getting their nails done, powerwalking and doing tiktok videos.  No I am not joking. If she is going to ride Jen for her husband's success then she should be hating on a lot of people in the area, and probably a majority of her social circle.   

And lest they forget, Jen is getting paid to do this show. Just like Margaret.  So she is contributing to the household income. 

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On 3/31/2021 at 9:41 PM, ichbin said:

Let me pretend that all of this is real....Jackie should be the injured party, why is it that I cannot muster up any sympathy for her and can only roll my eyes when she is crying and upset, all the while hoping that the screen will quickly go on to something else?  I was actually glad to watch yet another scene of Joe, Melissa, and T going at it regarding the same old issues.  

Because she lives for being a victim! It's such an energy suck.

On 3/31/2021 at 10:29 PM, Miss Slay said:

To be fair, I'm not sure Margaret's assessment of Jennifer's house was routed in xenophobia. Reza and MJ from Shah's of Sunset compared Jen's decorating style to "new money" and "Saddam Hussein's palace" - while urging her to hire Jeff Lewis! Jen's house IS tacky, as is Teresa's...and Melissa's. Apparently tacky decorating knows no nationality.

Don't leave Margaret's horrible decor out of this!

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On 3/31/2021 at 11:52 PM, Bronzedog said:

This is not the first time it’s happened, but, I think it’s so weird when Joe and Teresa tell each other that all they have is each other.  They both have kids and Joe has Melissa.  WTH?

Immediate family is different. I know what he means, unfortunately. 

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On 4/1/2021 at 9:31 AM, Real Housewife LI said:

Jackie’s face looks bad....

Entire Jackie looks bad. She needs to gain some more weight, and I do sympathize.  Yogurt for breakfast when there was all that great (bad for you, but it’s a vacation) food. Feel bad about the anorexia.  The crying for sympathy, no. 

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On 4/1/2021 at 9:00 AM, Baltimore Betty said:

My thought was that Evan might have cheated or gotten caught by Jackie texting someone before he could seal the deal, last summer there was a Hampton's trip that gave us a peak at Jackie's eating disorder, the stress of Evan stepping out might have caused that eating disorder to flare up...just a thought, and now Tre decides to put their business out there making it a fresh wound for Jackie.

 

On 4/1/2021 at 9:15 AM, TV Diva Queen said:

Jackie is NOT in a good place, her hair kept getting worse and worse.  and if anyone cares, I believe Evan cheated too.  

 

On 4/1/2021 at 3:11 PM, njbchlover said:

Too bad Jackie had to miss out and eat her two containers of yogurt.  I don't think Jackie keeps kosher - she doesn't seem like a very religious Jewish person, so it must have been because she's still afraid to eat real food.

 

On 4/1/2021 at 3:15 PM, BrownBear2012 said:

I noticed how thin Jackie is...it's really noticable this season. I think her eating disorder is back...the only thing I saw her eat last night was a yogurt.

 

On 4/1/2021 at 6:14 PM, janiema said:

The best thing Evan can do for his career, family and Jackie is to get her off the show. She is simply too fragile. In light of her admitted eating disorder issues, it is too dangerous for her to remain.

I don't think anyone with an eating disorder past/present/recovering should be on a reality show. Without the cameras, there would be less stress. Let's face it with the RH franchise - 80% of the scenes involve food. Jackie has to pretend to eat and egads she is going to have to put some kind of food into her mouth.

How many food items have you all ever seen her consume? I can only count a piece of lettuce which probably had no dressing on it. I've seen her order food but never eat it. I've seen her drink or at least pretend to take a sip of wine. There was a scene of them driving to the shore and Jackie was holding a wheat thin waving it around - but she never put it in her mouth.

I've seen her fluffing. This is a phrase I learned after finding out that a co-worker had an ED. She'd take food, let's say a muffin - put it on the plate. Break it up into 10,000 crumbs, spread it all over the plate. Pretend eat throughout a conversation, but never did she actually consume any of it. Or take something like a piece of meat and big chunk of it is left on the side - with excuses not to consume it because it's gristly or it's the fat or it's too raw.

Those yogurts - I didn't see her eat either.

She also has to prove how healthy she is by cooking and serving food to her kids/husband on camera. Never seen her talk about the food groups and/or a healthy balanced diet.

Never heard her talk about how she got help or what resources/groups were used to keep on track.

I recall many times Margaret asking her if she wanted breakfast, lunch, snack - and she's never hungry or claims she ate before arriving to said event.

My thought is her ED has been raging all this time and seeing herself on tape and being conscious of the cameras while filming is only making it worse.

The reason she keeps the extensions is to hide the massive hair loss. I think she thinks the long extensions give the illusion that she has lots of hair. It's teased and raggedy to hide the bald spots. She should just get a full on wig

 

Edited by KungFuBunny
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6 minutes ago, KungFuBunny said:

 

 

 

 

I don't think anyone with an eating disorder past/present/recovering should be on a reality show. Without the cameras, there would be less stress. Let's face it with the RH franchise - 80% of the scenes involve food. Jackie has to pretend to eat and egads she is going to have to put some kind of food into her mouth.

How many food items have you all ever seen her consume? I can only count a piece of lettuce which probably had no dressing on it. I've seen her order food but never eat it. I've seen her drink or at least pretend to take a sip of wine. There was a scene of them driving to the shore and Jackie was holding a wheat thin waving it around - but she never put it in her mouth.

I've seen her fluffing. This is a phrase I learned after finding out that a co-worker had an ED. She'd take food, let's say a muffin - put it on the plate. Break it up into 10,000 crumbs, spread it all over the plate. Pretend eat throughout a conversation, but never did she actually consume any of it. Or take something like a piece of meat and big chunk of it is left on the side - with excuses not to consumed because it's gristly or it's the fat or it's too raw.

Those yogurts - I didn't see her eat either.

She also has to prove how healthy she is by cooking and serving food to her kids/husband on camera. Never seen her talk about the food groups and/or a healthy balanced diet.

Never heard her talk about how she got help or what resources/groups were used to keep on track.

I recall many times Margaret asking her if she wanted breakfast, lunch, snack - and she's never hungry or claims she ate before arriving to said event.

My thought is her ED has been raging all this time and seeing herself on tape and being conscious of the cameras while filming is only making it worse.

The reason she keeps the extensions is to hide the massive hair loss. I think she thinks the long extensions give the illusion that she has lots of hair. It's teased and raggedy to hide the bald spots. She should just get a full on wig

 

100%!

I did see her put a spoon to her mouth while holding the yogurt container, not saying there was more than a dram of yogurt on that spoon but I saw her go thru the motions.  

 

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24 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

100%!

I did see her put a spoon to her mouth while holding the yogurt container, not saying there was more than a dram of yogurt on that spoon but I saw her go thru the motions.  

 

I can see why yogurt is her go to. The container is solid so no one can tell how much she eats of it. Then she can toss the container into the garbage. Unless the host or another person goes into the garbage to look.

 

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12 hours ago, PhilMarlowe2 said:

Don't leave Margaret's horrible decor out of this!

Like her personal style, for some reason the end effect always looks somewhat unkempt. I think she's going for casual chic but something gets lost in the translation. It looks like the decor is supposed to be some kind of 60's/70's retro but it comes off like a gothic hippy mess instead. Honestly, even though I don't like them, if forced to pick I would prefer any of the others over Margaret's.

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I don't know if Evan has cheated or not, and I think the real problem is that neither does Jackie.  If he had been caught cheating by her, I think things would have looked slightly different as they played out.  But I can honestly see why someone might be a teensy bit worried in her position - her husband is good looking, now slightly famous, and started going to the gym.  Even "going to the gym" is considered to be a red flag for possible cheating.  (I'm not saying everyone who starts going to the gym, but it's considered a possible "sign", like starting to be more possessive about your phone or something.)  I think she is absolutely terrified that Evan has or will cheat, and then for someone to say it out loud?  Unhinged.  She is CLINGING to him, and it honestly makes me worry for her and their marriage. That kind of insecurity and clinginess can be really off putting, even from someone who love very much.

I also think that's why she was so quick to move on with Teresa.  Not only did Tre "apologize" but she then legitimized them as a couple, taking pictures and telling them to kiss - that's exactly what Jackie wanted/needed.  I think, though, she was actually very disappointed that Evan didn't "turn up" on Tre.  I think in her dream scenario, she wanted Even to stop talking about this impacting his professional reputation, but instead go ape-shit on Teresa because how dare anyone say he would cheat on Jackie, his beloved wife, mother of his children, all around wonder of a woman.  I can just picture her smugly in the background as it happened, waiting for her chance to yell WINNING at the end of Evan's tirade.

That said, in the real world, I would mostly be on her side in all this bullshit.  But in the real world, I also wouldn't have much sympathy if she didn't move on from a group of losers who clearly don't give a shit about her and will throw her under the bus in the blink of an eye.  But this is reality tv, not the real world, and she needs to get out of here.  She's not cut out for it, and that truly is a compliment.  But she is unraveling emotionally and perhaps also causing her body physical damage and it's just not ok and certainly no fun to watch.  I need Ho's who can hang and I don't have to feel badly for on a real life level.  Move. On.  

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2 hours ago, ichbin said:

Like her personal style, for some reason the end effect always looks somewhat unkempt. I think she's going for casual chic but something gets lost in the translation. It looks like the decor is supposed to be some kind of 60's/70's retro but it comes off like a gothic hippy mess instead. Honestly, even though I don't like them, if forced to pick I would prefer any of the others over Margaret's.

I think their home looks like they ordered every single page from the wallpaper sample book and pasted it up. It’s hard to believe that after many years of redecorating they wound up with this!

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8 hours ago, chediavolo said:

Immediate family is different. I know what he means, unfortunately. 

Legally speaking, immediate family is generally comprised of parents, grandparents, spouses, children, and siblings.  So by that standard, Melissa and Joe Gorga are immediate family, and Joe’s and Teresa’s respective kids are their immediate family just as much as Teresa and Joe Gorga are immediate family.  I give no quarter to this idea of “blood.”  It sounds so medieval to me.  I guess when people talk about “blood,” they’re talking about DNA?    We’re programmed not to procreate with people with the same DNA as ours, and to spread our seed elsewhere.  I’m really concerned—I’ve always been concerned—that they don’t seem to realize this.  

But I think what is even more important is that, colloquially, when people get marred and especially have kids, that family is usually considered their immediate family and everyone else takes a backseat—parents and siblings.  I think it’s really unhealthy to put one’s family of origin ahead of or on par with the family that they created by choice.  It causes so much upheaval and uncertainly as to where everyone stands.

Even Caroline “Fambly” Manzo had her pulse on this, at the season one table flip finale, when Jacqueline turned and Dina and called her a liar in front of everyone, and Caroline defended Chris Laurita for taking Jacqueline’s side.  Caroline said something like, “that’s your sister and that’s your wife, but you only wake up next to one of them.”  Bingo. 

Needless to say, I think a husband’s loyalty should firmly be with his wife, or they need to take a good, hard look about why they are together.  For Joe and Teresa to agree—on television, no less—that they are all the other one has, really gives me the creeps.  I’ve always been on Melissa’s side and against Teresa when it came to this particular issue.  But Melissa puts up with it, so my sympathy for her is quite limited.  Maybe if she hadn’t put herself and her husband on a TV show where they are jockeying for position and fighting over Teresa’s brother’s loyalty, there wouldn’t be so much confusion.  

But whenever Teresa has, over the past several seasons, acted like Joe Go needs to step in as a surrogate husband, because her husband is in jail, it really fucking freaks me out.  Those were choices made by Teresa and Joe Giudice, and if Joe and Melissa haven’t made the same decisions (or haven’t yet been caught making those decisions, which is my theory), I don’t think the Gorgas need to step up aka suffer for something the Giudices chose to do or not to do (such as disclosing the full range of their assets, which would have kept Teresa out of jail, which the judge is on record as saying).  

I think I prefer Teresa fighting with Joe Go (which is so freaking boring; they’ve been doing it since season three) to the behavior that is one step away from incest that goes on when they get along.  I never need him to tell her she’s sexy or her to admire his physique again.  When they kissed in this episode, the camera angle made it impossible for me to tell if it was on the lips on rewatch, and the fact that I think there is a distinct possibility it was on the lips is a problem.  Not healthy.  If I wanted to watch a show about adults who are in love with people from their family of origin, I’d watch Arrested Development.  

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1 hour ago, lasu said:

I don't know if Evan has cheated or not, and I think the real problem is that neither does Jackie.  If he had been caught cheating by her, I think things would have looked slightly different as they played out.  But I can honestly see why someone might be a teensy bit worried in her position - her husband is good looking, now slightly famous, and started going to the gym.  Even "going to the gym" is considered to be a red flag for possible cheating.  (I'm not saying everyone who starts going to the gym, but it's considered a possible "sign", like starting to be more possessive about your phone or something.)  I think she is absolutely terrified that Evan has or will cheat, and then for someone to say it out loud?  Unhinged.  She is CLINGING to him, and it honestly makes me worry for her and their marriage. That kind of insecurity and clinginess can be really off putting, even from someone who love very much.

I also think that's why she was so quick to move on with Teresa.  Not only did Tre "apologize" but she then legitimized them as a couple, taking pictures and telling them to kiss - that's exactly what Jackie wanted/needed.  I think, though, she was actually very disappointed that Evan didn't "turn up" on Tre.  I think in her dream scenario, she wanted Even to stop talking about this impacting his professional reputation, but instead go ape-shit on Teresa because how dare anyone say he would cheat on Jackie, his beloved wife, mother of his children, all around wonder of a woman.  I can just picture her smugly in the background as it happened, waiting for her chance to yell WINNING at the end of Evan's tirade.

That said, in the real world, I would mostly be on her side in all this bullshit.  But in the real world, I also wouldn't have much sympathy if she didn't move on from a group of losers who clearly don't give a shit about her and will throw her under the bus in the blink of an eye.  But this is reality tv, not the real world, and she needs to get out of here.  She's not cut out for it, and that truly is a compliment.  But she is unraveling emotionally and perhaps also causing her body physical damage and it's just not ok and certainly no fun to watch.  I need Ho's who can hang and I don't have to feel badly for on a real life level.  Move. On.  

I don’t think Evan cheated. I like him but I do agree that Jackie is worried about it.

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1 hour ago, LibertarianSlut said:

Legally speaking, immediate family is generally comprised of parents, grandparents, spouses, children, and siblings.  So by that standard, Melissa and Joe Gorga are immediate family, and Joe’s and Teresa’s respective kids are their immediate family just as much as Teresa and Joe Gorga are immediate family.  I give no quarter to this idea of “blood.”  It sounds so medieval to me.  I guess when people talk about “blood,” they’re talking about DNA?    We’re programmed not to procreate with people with the same DNA as ours, and to spread our seed elsewhere.  I’m really concerned—I’ve always been concerned—that they don’t seem to realize this.  

FWIW, I do get what I *think* they are saying, which is more that they are all they have left of their family of origin.  Not that they would put it above their children - I don't think Joe Go OR Tre would put the other over their own children.  But I am reaching an age where almost all of my family who is older than me is gone.  And it's really made realize the value of people who have known you forever.  I think it's weird the way they phrase it, like they don't (or didn't have) spouses or children, but there is something unique about the people who hold your whole history.  I'm an only child who raised by my single dad, so when he passed away (almost 20 years ago now, sigh), I lost a lot of my own history.  There is no one I can go to say, "Hey, do you remember that time the hall bathroom became infested overnight with horseflies???"  So I understand why Joe Go and Tre hold on to that.  When one of them goes, the other won't have anyone who can reach back in time with them, and that's a true loss.  My cousin, who I was extremely close with, died when we were young, and while I know my aunt loves me for me, I also know that she loves me because I loved Matt and we can talk about him.  A year or two ago, I told her a story that showed that Matt knew about s-e-x, and I didn't realize she didn't know he knew.  So 30 years after his death, she got to learn something new about her son.  You can only do that with someone you have history with.  When she dies, I'll never get to talk about Matt with someone who knew him ever again, and that will be a huge loss to me.  I wouldn't have put my aunt above my spouse or children, but my (imaginary) spouse and (imaginary) children will never know my cousin.  So, I get it.
 

Also, DAMMIT for making me defend and COMPARE MY OWN SELF to these idjits, lol!!

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Remember when they went to that retreat several seasons ago? When the Joe's fought? I remember her saying to Joe Go "I'm family, stick with your blood" and then he said "I'm not sticking with scum like you" which caused the whole Joes fight. So Teresa has always wanted Joe Go to choose her over his own wife and kids, but she would never have put him above Juicy (when they were married) and her own kids. Teresa really expected him to ditch Melissa and their 3 children to "stick with blood". She's insane.

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59 minutes ago, LibertarianSlut said:

Legally speaking, immediate family is generally comprised of parents, grandparents, spouses, children, and siblings.  So by that standard, Melissa and Joe Gorga are immediate family, and Joe’s and Teresa’s respective kids are their immediate family just as much as Teresa and Joe Gorga are immediate family.  I give no quarter to this idea of “blood.”  It sounds so medieval to me.  I guess when people talk about “blood,” they’re talking about DNA?    We’re programmed not to procreate with people with the same DNA as ours, and to spread our seed elsewhere.  I’m really concerned—I’ve always been concerned—that they don’t seem to realize this.  

But I think what is even more important is that, colloquially, when people get marred and especially have kids, that family is usually considered their immediate family and everyone else takes a backseat—parents and siblings.  I think it’s really unhealthy to put one’s family of origin ahead of or on par with the family that they created by choice.  It causes so much upheaval and uncertainly as to where everyone stands.

Even Caroline “Fambly” Manzo had her pulse on this, at the season one table flip finale, when Jacqueline turned and Dina and called her a liar in front of everyone, and Caroline defended Chris Laurita for taking Jacqueline’s side.  Caroline said something like, “that’s your sister and that’s your wife, but you only wake up next to one of them.”  Bingo. 

Needless to say, I think a husband’s loyalty should firmly be with his wife, or they need to take a good, hard look about why they are together.  For Joe and Teresa to agree—on television, no less—that they are all the other one has, really gives me the creeps.  I’ve always been on Melissa’s side and against Teresa when it came to this particular issue.  But Melissa puts up with it, so my sympathy for her is quite limited.  Maybe if she hadn’t put herself and her husband on a TV show where they are jockeying for position and fighting over Teresa’s brother’s loyalty, there wouldn’t be so much confusion.  

But whenever Teresa has, over the past several seasons, acted like Joe Go needs to step in as a surrogate husband, because her husband is in jail, it really fucking freaks me out.  Those were choices made by Teresa and Joe Giudice, and if Joe and Melissa haven’t made the same decisions (or haven’t yet been caught making those decisions, which is my theory), I don’t think the Gorgas need to step up aka suffer for something the Giudices chose to do or not to do (such as disclosing the full range of their assets, which would have kept Teresa out of jail, which the judge is on record as saying).  

I think I prefer Teresa fighting with Joe Go (which is so freaking boring; they’ve been doing it since season three) to the behavior that is one step away from incest that goes on when they get along.  I never need him to tell her she’s sexy or her to admire his physique again.  When they kissed in this episode, the camera angle made it impossible for me to tell if it was on the lips on rewatch, and the fact that I think there is a distinct possibility it was on the lips is a problem.  Not healthy.  If I wanted to watch a show about adults who are in love with people from their family of origin, I’d watch Arrested Development.  

Yikes. Overthink much? OK so maybe immediate family wasn’t the correct term I wasn’t speaking “legally”. I’ve never heard of immediate family being anything other than the family you grew up in, parents and children.  What would you call that ? Original  family? There is a deep bond with your brothers and sisters and your parents. Maybe you don’t feel it but some of us do. I think it’s one of the nicer things I see on this show. Nothing incestual going on between them but sure they may be a little too open for some people. 

47 minutes ago, lasu said:

FWIW, I do get what I *think* they are saying, which is more that they are all they have left of their family of origin.  Not that they would put it above their children - I don't think Joe Go OR Tre would put the other over their own children.  But I am reaching an age where almost all of my family who is older than me is gone.  And it's really made realize the value of people who have known you forever.  I think it's weird the way they phrase it, like they don't (or didn't have) spouses or children, but there is something unique about the people who hold your whole history.  I'm an only child who raised by my single dad, so when he passed away (almost 20 years ago now, sigh), I lost a lot of my own history.  There is no one I can go to say, "Hey, do you remember that time the hall bathroom became infested overnight with horseflies???"  So I understand why Joe Go and Tre hold on to that.  When one of them goes, the other won't have anyone who can reach back in time with them, and that's a true loss.  My cousin, who I was extremely close with, died when we were young, and while I know my aunt loves me for me, I also know that she loves me because I loved Matt and we can talk about him.  A year or two ago, I told her a story that showed that Matt knew about s-e-x, and I didn't realize she didn't know he knew.  So 30 years after his death, she got to learn something new about her son.  You can only do that with someone you have history with.  When she dies, I'll never get to talk about Matt with someone who knew him ever again, and that will be a huge loss to me.  I wouldn't have put my aunt above my spouse or children, but my (imaginary) spouse and (imaginary) children will never know my cousin.  So, I get it.
 

Also, DAMMIT for making me defend and COMPARE MY OWN SELF to these idjits, lol!!

Good explanation for those that think Once you are married your Family of origin or whatever the hell it’s called is not important anymore

nothing could be more important than those you were around in your formative years. 

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1 hour ago, chediavolo said:

Yikes. Overthink much?

That’s a strange question.  Clearly, *I* don’t think I’m “overthink[ing]” if I decided to write a post with that length and that specificity—those are the exact amount of words that I felt were appropriate to convey my ideas of what is dysfunctional with the Gorga-Giudices.  If someone decides to go on at greater length than someone else, that’s not an affront to the person who wrote the shorter post.  This is not a personal endeavor (for me).  😁

I used the post in question as a jumping-off point to voice ideas that I have had about these people for years.  It’s not a lesson or message to any given poster if I begin my post with a definition of “immediate family.”  I then went on to say what I thought of “immediate family” colloquially, so I covered everything that I thought appropriate.  We clearly disagree about whether the substance of what goes on between the families is healthy, which is fine.  I’m not sure why it would get more personal than that, but I suppose not everything is for me to understand.  😇

Happy final game of March Madness tonight, to anyone who follows!  🏀

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4 hours ago, lasu said:

FWIW, I do get what I *think* they are saying, which is more that they are all they have left of their family of origin.  Not that they would put it above their children - I don't think Joe Go OR Tre would put the other over their own children.  But I am reaching an age where almost all of my family who is older than me is gone.  And it's really made realize the value of people who have known you forever.  I think it's weird the way they phrase it, like they don't (or didn't have) spouses or children, but there is something unique about the people who hold your whole history.  I'm an only child who raised by my single dad, so when he passed away (almost 20 years ago now, sigh), I lost a lot of my own history.  There is no one I can go to say, "Hey, do you remember that time the hall bathroom became infested overnight with horseflies???"  So I understand why Joe Go and Tre hold on to that.  When one of them goes, the other won't have anyone who can reach back in time with them, and that's a true loss.  My cousin, who I was extremely close with, died when we were young, and while I know my aunt loves me for me, I also know that she loves me because I loved Matt and we can talk about him.  A year or two ago, I told her a story that showed that Matt knew about s-e-x, and I didn't realize she didn't know he knew.  So 30 years after his death, she got to learn something new about her son.  You can only do that with someone you have history with.  When she dies, I'll never get to talk about Matt with someone who knew him ever again, and that will be a huge loss to me.  I wouldn't have put my aunt above my spouse or children, but my (imaginary) spouse and (imaginary) children will never know my cousin.  So, I get it.
 

Also, DAMMIT for making me defend and COMPARE MY OWN SELF to these idjits, lol!!

What you wrote is so beautiful and poignant. I must be pmsing because I have something in my left eye from reading this. 😂

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Honestly, I think that they make these comments because after both parents are gone, it is an incredibly lonely feeling.  It doesn't matter who is around you, if you are married or divorced, surrounded by kids or no kids, even if there are cousins, aunts and uncles near by.  It is lonely.  And the sibling(s) can best help recreate the feeling of that specific family unit.  At least in my experience.  

But it can go other ways.  Joe probably feels the same way about Melissa and quite honestly if Tre and Juicy had made it as a couple, she would be saying it to him as well.  

Basically it comes down to a giant void that you desperately try to fill with the people that were closest to them and the people thay are closest to you

  Sometimes that overlaps.  But I am not sure I am explaining myself well.  I hear them say "you are all I have left" and I get it.

The peck on the lips, however?  Not so much. 

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5 hours ago, lasu said:

FWIW, I do get what I *think* they are saying, which is more that they are all they have left of their family of origin.  Not that they would put it above their children - I don't think Joe Go OR Tre would put the other over their own children.  But I am reaching an age where almost all of my family who is older than me is gone.  And it's really made realize the value of people who have known you forever.

I get it too. My uncle, one of 3 brothers, died recently. His older brother (my dad) and his parents are all gone. When my surviving uncle got the news, he said something along the lines of “I’m alone now”. Of course, he’s not really alone; he has a wife, 2 kids and a grandchild, all of whom he’s closer to than his brother has been in recent years. But in terms of the people who knew him when he was becoming who he is today, and with whom he shared all his history-he doesn’t have that anymore. It’s a different kind of bond, but an important one to many people. 

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On 4/1/2021 at 9:17 PM, Shannah Banana said:

I'm not really sure what Delores brings to the table?  She needs to get into a fight with someone pretty soon, or what is the point of being on this soapy? 

Delores is there solely to enable Theresa.  That's it. She brings nothing to the show, no story line, no emotional weight, nothing but her endless awards for her endless appearances which actually cost the charities money. But if Theresa is doing something ignorant or cruel, Delores is right there to soft soap it for the audience.

And that, I think, is why Margaret was so angry at Jennifer at dinner. Jennifer & Theresa were going after Jackie like a pair of hyenas & they just wouldn't shut up with their wide-eyed "but what did we say?" mean girl shtick. It wd've infuriated me, too. Theresa is so played out. Every season the same pettiness, ignorance, vacuity, & cruelty. Can we just dump her felonious ass?

ETA: Delores is also there to start trouble, as when she said to Frank, for absolutely no reason, "Evan's on his way & I think he's coming in hot." She's such a useless shit-stirring bitch.

 

Edited by TakeAPinotGrigio
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On 4/3/2021 at 4:10 AM, Alonzo Mosely FBI said:

Jackie looks so defeated. Her posture is whack and her head is always down.  She cannot even stand up straight in the room alone with her husband. She is not okay and I empathize. 

Thanks for posting this. It's nice to read some compassion.

ETA: As someone who has had/has an eating disorder, reading these boards . . . . Some of you need to think twice. Would you be writing this shit about someone who had cancer? No wonder Theresa has so many fans here.

Edited by TakeAPinotGrigio
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1 hour ago, TakeAPinotGrigio said:

Delores is there solely to enable Theresa.  That's it. She brings nothing to the show, no story line, no emotional weight, nothing but her endless awards for her endless appearances which actually cost the charities money. But if Theresa is doing something ignorant or cruel, Delores is right there to soft soap it for the audience.

And that, I think, is why Margaret was so angry at Jennifer at dinner. Jennifer & Theresa were going after Jackie like a pair of hyenas & they just wouldn't shut up with their wide-eyed "but what did we say?" mean girl shtick. It wd've infuriated me, too. Theresa is so played out. Every season the same pettiness, ignorance, vacuity, & cruelty. Can we just dump her felonious ass?

ETA: Delores is also there to start trouble, as when she said to Frank, for absolutely no reason, "Evan's on his way & I think he's coming in hot." She's such a useless shit-stirring bitch.

 

While I think that is generally true (Delores is just there to be ride-or-die for Teresa), I've been kind of surprised at how much more neutral she's been during this season.  I wouldn't go so far to call her a peacemaker, but she's been more open to being friendly with people like Margaret or Jackie, who have their obvious issues with Teresa.  I don't know if she'll stick around or not after this season because she doesn't really have much of a story but her weird relationship but it has been kind of nice to see her be a tiny bit less of a lapdog to Teresa. 

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On 4/5/2021 at 8:47 AM, KungFuBunny said:

 

 

 

 

I don't think anyone with an eating disorder past/present/recovering should be on a reality show. Without the cameras, there would be less stress. Let's face it with the RH franchise - 80% of the scenes involve food. Jackie has to pretend to eat and egads she is going to have to put some kind of food into her mouth.

How many food items have you all ever seen her consume? I can only count a piece of lettuce which probably had no dressing on it. I've seen her order food but never eat it. I've seen her drink or at least pretend to take a sip of wine. There was a scene of them driving to the shore and Jackie was holding a wheat thin waving it around - but she never put it in her mouth.

I've seen her fluffing. This is a phrase I learned after finding out that a co-worker had an ED. She'd take food, let's say a muffin - put it on the plate. Break it up into 10,000 crumbs, spread it all over the plate. Pretend eat throughout a conversation, but never did she actually consume any of it. Or take something like a piece of meat and big chunk of it is left on the side - with excuses not to consume it because it's gristly or it's the fat or it's too raw.

Those yogurts - I didn't see her eat either.

She also has to prove how healthy she is by cooking and serving food to her kids/husband on camera. Never seen her talk about the food groups and/or a healthy balanced diet.

Never heard her talk about how she got help or what resources/groups were used to keep on track.

I recall many times Margaret asking her if she wanted breakfast, lunch, snack - and she's never hungry or claims she ate before arriving to said event.

My thought is her ED has been raging all this time and seeing herself on tape and being conscious of the cameras while filming is only making it worse.

The reason she keeps the extensions is to hide the massive hair loss. I think she thinks the long extensions give the illusion that she has lots of hair. It's teased and raggedy to hide the bald spots. She should just get a full on wig

 

So, let me just say that if I thought she was hiding this, I would comment on it differently. But I have a bigger issue with this because, as I commented last season, Jackie - a noted intelligent woman who extols her mental prowess at every turn - chose to make this one of her main storylines. Once you put this on TV, the narrative is out of your hands. But Jackie does not seem to get this. She went ballistic on Margaret last season (much the same way she lashed out at Marge and Joe B. at the dinner last week) for so much as suggesting she still has a problem. She intensely needs to present this narrative of "cured" but still skinny! This is blatantly false, and you don't need to be all that perceptive to figure it out. 

I think it is really irresponsible to go on TV with an eating disorder, talk about it, present yourself as "fine," and never allow anyone to question you about it. Because anyone looking at Jackie and believing she's fine is warped. And if some girl out there with food issues watches and starts to believe that Jackie's method of coping and eating is ok, she's headed down a sick and dangerous path. I am not even in the cast and I'm tired of walking on eggshells for Jackie - eggshells about the husband, about the weight, about the food, about her money. She was a bad casting decision from the jump, but this is the most egregious portion for me. 

I watched a friend get sicker and sicker with bulimia and anorexia. I tried and tried to help her but she, much like Jackie, was a highly educated and intelligent woman who shut down any questions. She passed away last July. And she looked far healthier than Jackie does now. I have openly said before that I questioned Evan's judgment that he married Jackie with her looking the way she did at the wedding. I'm not being mean when I say, she looked scary. 

At least when Jules was on NYC, she openly admitted to being in a precarious place and was open about relapse. She was ok with a dialogue, because she put it out there. I think, if Bravo wants to go on an apology tour about Native American costumes and COVID travel and virus disbelief and so forth, then maybe they should also take some responsibility for allowing a dangerous, false health narrative to play out here over and over again. I think it's obvious Jackie needs some level of intervention, and allowing her to continue on the show without some level of honesty about her physical and mental health is highly irresponsible. 

On that level, I have sympathy for Jackie. As far as the show game goes, I am exhausted by her. She behaves the way Brandi Glanville did back in the day on BH - she takes quick jabs and low blows and then when confronted about them, goes and cries a lot and begs for sympathy. Jackie started her tenure on the show throwing Juicy's incarceration in Tre's face publicly. Then she openly criticized Jen's parenting and her children. Instead of really having an easy go at Tre for spreading the rumor about Evan, she spoke ill of Gia. Then she made another jail comment to Teresa. If you want to get down in the mud, get down in the mud. I won't blame her at all. But you can't "go there" and then run away crying when people retaliate. It wears thin. If you're so smart, Jackie, you should be able to handle yourself better than someone who's soooo beneath your intellect level, as you believe Tre to be.

Sad truth is that constant starvation and nutrient deprivation takes a toll on your brain, as well as your looks. I want Jackie off the show because I think she's a wrong fit for it, but I also think she should get some real treatment, because she is at a breaking point, and it has nothing to do with Teresa Giudice. 

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22 hours ago, TakeAPinotGrigio said:

Delores is there solely to enable Theresa.  That's it. She brings nothing to the show, no story line, no emotional weight, nothing but her endless awards for her endless appearances which actually cost the charities money. But if Theresa is doing something ignorant or cruel, Delores is right there to soft soap it for the audience.

And that, I think, is why Margaret was so angry at Jennifer at dinner. Jennifer & Theresa were going after Jackie like a pair of hyenas & they just wouldn't shut up with their wide-eyed "but what did we say?" mean girl shtick. It wd've infuriated me, too. Theresa is so played out. Every season the same pettiness, ignorance, vacuity, & cruelty. Can we just dump her felonious ass?

ETA: Delores is also there to start trouble, as when she said to Frank, for absolutely no reason, "Evan's on his way & I think he's coming in hot." She's such a useless shit-stirring bitch.

 

It doesn’t seem that Dolores was shit-stirring when she made this comment. I think that she and Frank were alone at the time (except not production). The only reason she would believe  that Evan was coming in hot would have been that that’s something Jackie told the group. I think that Jackie was disappointed that he didn’t. Evan has a business reputation (in addition to his marital relationship) and it would not have served him well to have acted like a jerk. He can leave that to Jackie.

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On 4/1/2021 at 1:29 AM, Miss Slay said:

To be fair, I'm not sure Margaret's assessment of Jennifer's house was routed in xenophobia. Reza and MJ from Shah's of Sunset compared Jen's decorating style to "new money" and "Saddam Hussein's palace" - while urging her to hire Jeff Lewis! Jen's house IS tacky, as is Teresa's...and Melissa's. Apparently tacky decorating knows no nationality.

 

On 4/5/2021 at 1:52 AM, PhilMarlowe2 said:

 

Don't leave Margaret's horrible decor out of this!

Margaret's decor is completely tacky and so over the top!!  It's like entering a boardwalk fun house with all kinds of crazy rooms decorated to make you get dizzy or give you the spins!!!   Too many big, ugly prints, too many loud colors and over the top furniture, especially in what is still essentially a construction zone.  Much like Margaret herself, and her personal fashion sense - her clothes often have too many big, ugly prints in loud colors, and Margaret herself seems very over the top and after her recent plastic surgery, appears to still be under some construction.  (oooh....that was mean of me!)  😉

While Jennifer's, Teresa's and Melissa's style of decorating is not exactly to my taste, I can accept and appreciate it.  There are many things about each of their homes that I do like.  

Teresa had her kitchen cabinets painted a light cream and updated some of the furniture.  She re-did her Italianate formal living room for a more modern, contemporary look that hopefully helps sell her house.  I liked both of those things.  I also like her pool and patio area.

Jennifer's house - I do love the HUGE kitchen!  Her basement is probably a kids' dream, so I like that she thought of her kids when either purchasing or building the house.  She also has a very nice backyard/pool/entertaining area.

Melissa - I love the kitchen in her Montvale house, and their basement is to die for!!!  (excluding the now dusty and never used recording "studio").  Their shore house is everything I would ever want in a home, and the perfect size.  

Edited by njbchlover
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5 hours ago, thesupremediva1 said:

On that level, I have sympathy for Jackie. As far as the show game goes, I am exhausted by her. She behaves the way Brandi Glanville did back in the day on BH - she takes quick jabs and low blows and then when confronted about them, goes and cries a lot and begs for sympathy. Jackie started her tenure on the show throwing Juicy's incarceration in Tre's face publicly. Then she openly criticized Jen's parenting and her children. Instead of really having an easy go at Tre for spreading the rumor about Evan, she spoke ill of Gia. Then she made another jail comment to Teresa. If you want to get down in the mud, get down in the mud. I won't blame her at all. But you can't "go there" and then run away crying when people retaliate. It wears thin. If you're so smart, Jackie, you should be able to handle yourself better than someone who's soooo beneath your intellect level, as you believe Tre to be.

Sad truth is that constant starvation and nutrient deprivation takes a toll on your brain, as well as your looks. I want Jackie off the show because I think she's a wrong fit for it, but I also think she should get some real treatment, because she is at a breaking point, and it has nothing to do with Teresa Giudice. 

Exactly!

I remember when Jackass wrote that article and then claimed she wasn't talking about Jennifer's kids. What people most remember is the article about "spoiled children" because that's the only one they addressed on the show. I remember going on line and googling the article myself. Not only did she write about spoiled children/present buying but she also wrote about making sure your kids don't become obese. Both of these articles were posted after Jennifer invited the other kids to her house to play. The obesity article contains pictures of about 4 sets of kids who are not stick thin like herself. I cringe when I think of her approaching parents to sign a release form with them not knowing she's going to attach their pics to an article about childhood obesity. That's so obnoxious and insensitive. I'm pretty sure the other ladies read that article too - but they didn't address it on the show because the spoiled children one was nasty enough.

Jackass has a tendency to bring the kids into it as opposed to addressing the person she has problems with. She's fucking passive aggressive and then claims oh no that's not what she meant or that's not who she was talking about.

 

 

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10 hours ago, KungFuBunny said:

Jackass has a tendency to bring the kids into it as opposed to addressing the person she has problems with. She's fucking passive aggressive and then claims oh no that's not what she meant or that's not who she was talking about.

Nailed it!  I always thought that article (and the subsequent denial of what was obvious) was a real bitch move that she largely got away with, and it sticks in my craw to this day.  

I am glad that you are shedding light on the fact that it goes even deeper!  Jackie doesn’t fight fair, she throws rocks, and when she is called on it, she hides her hands.  But God forbid someone says something to or about Jackie that isn’t exactly to her liking (and I’m not talking about Teresa; I’m talking about Jennifer and even Margaret), they have to atone 50 ways from Sunday.

Just pivoting to something else mentioned in the post—and this isn’t a defense of Jackie, because using pictures of kids in a distorted way sits wrong with me—childhood obesity is a big problem.  The data back me up that is is much more prevalent than under eating disorders.  I believe in live and let live for adults, but children need guidance and structure, and allowing them to become obese before they are 18 (and obese is a lot smaller than a lot of us believe) is setting them back so far behind their peers who are of normal weight.  If a parent allows their child to be obese, the child in question essentially has to undo an entire lifetime of learned behaviors at 18, or they are at really high risk of not just a whole host of diseases and conditions, but their social options are severely limited.  I just think that’s patently unfair for a guardian of children to put someone out in the world at a disadvantage in that way.  

So to the extent that this issue is brought to the forefront, I think that is extremely worthy and important.  To the extent that parents let their kids be obese and do not intervene, especially when those parents are medical doctors, I am appalled.  I think it’s a form of child abuse.  There are people on this cast I have to look at more closely in that regard.  But none of this excuses Jackie’s poor behavior and her oversensitive MO.  

I will stick up for Jackie in the tiniest way in that she paid (overinflated) lip service to eating healthily last season when she quizzed her kids about food, and they all appear to be of a healthy weight.  I would rather see a parent struggle with an eating disorder (regardless of the disorder) but teach their kids to be healthy, rather than a parent who is now fitter than a fiddle, but allows her kids to take in more calories than they are burning, thus allowing excess fat to flourish.  Clearly, neither is ideal and kids are not stupid—they don’t fall for “do as I say, not as I do” as much as we adults think they do, but I do think Jackie is aware of her disorder and is trying not to let her kids follow in her footsteps, and that is more than I can say for the other cast member.  

To me, is it not ideal to have to choose to either be an obese child or have a parent that is obsessed with counting calories—kids shouldn’t have to deal with either in a perfect world—but the way I view it, I would rather see the parent (who theoretically has free will) smoking cigarettes than the kids, and in the same vein, I would rather see the parent have an eating disorder than the kid.  And I think that the data support the idea that smoking cigarettes can be less deadly than obesity, and obesity is currently more of a threat.  

I am just using my own thoughts to discuss how seriously I take childhood obesity.  I am not in any way stating that anyone on the board has endorsed it.  It also sucks to defend Jackie, even in a qualified way, but I comment on what I see on my screen.  I also commend Teresa for being a positive influence on Milania and helping her shed 40 lbs.  It can be done when the parent is supportive and health-conscious.  If they don’t see childhood obesity as a problem, that is a big problem IMO.  It’s getting harder for me to ignore.  I feel terrible about the adult neglect that appears to be going on in one of these households.  

This doesn’t excuse Jackie’s shady ways.  I am glad she is bringing attention to this issue.  I wish she would do it in a more positive way.  But Jackie makes everything negative, so I’m not surprised.  

Edited by LibertarianSlut · Reason: Typos
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On 4/5/2021 at 4:21 PM, janiema said:

I think their home looks like they ordered every single page from the wallpaper sample book and pasted it up. It’s hard to believe that after many years of redecorating they wound up with this!

Don't get me wrong, I love a bold look, not in my house but I can appreciate the look in small doses but Marge had done it in every room, an accent wall sometimes is enough but she went hog wild.  My house is more of that laid back California casual, (Marge would think it boring) beige, blues mixed with multi tonal wood furniture but that is what makes me happy. 

In my opinion Marge should have scaled back on the circus of wallpapers and stuck with just a few colors but I don't have to live there, thankfully.

I do wonder what her inspiration was. 

 

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I don’t think Teresa is a BAD person, per say, her fierce love for her children and parents prove that. But I think she’s vindictive and holds grudges. 

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3 minutes ago, SheTalksShit said:

I don’t think Teresa is a BAD person, per say, her fierce love for her children and parents prove that. But I think she’s vindictive and holds grudges. 

And stupid.

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