S17.E09: In My Life

[Lady Calypso]

Though I always will think that Owen is worse than Teddy due to all the things he's done to women in his life throughout the series up until recently, Teddy is only marginally a better person than him because now we're just getting shoved down out throats what a victim Teddy is to love or whatever. I think the biggest issue is that they tore Teddy down to be a despicable person, almost to the level that Owen has been, and then tried giving her sympathy here just because they seemed to realize that they tore her down TOO much. She used to be a decent person before she came back from Germany. Then they added backstory that probably should have remained on the writing room floor and continued to have her make choices that made me SYMPATHIZE with Owen for a hot minute. OWEN. 

This episode was really just the show shoving down out throats that Teddy should be forgiven because of her trauma. I do think that it's important to note that Teddy has had trauma, but having her breaking point be Deluca, someone she barely worked with before COVID, and then relating her trauma only to her love life? It was a weird choice, for sure.

The only shining bright spot was Dream Owen and Dream Deluca being hilarious. Kevin McKidd and Giacomo Gianniotti really added something to the dream sequences that made them tolerable.

Amelia really gave Owen a smack-down. I loved that she brought back Owen's worst incident of strangling Cristina, but I wish she had also mentioned all the times Owen cheated on his significant others, because it still tops Teddy's cheating. 

I do expect Grey's to have Teddy be totally fine without any therapy, just because Grey's has never focused much on the therapy aspect unless it's for a Very Special Episode. Having Teddy go catatonic for 24 hours isn't enough for her to be totally better from her PTSD. 

Overall, an episode I have recommended my friends to skip, besides the scene where Amelia tears into Owen, because that was awesome to see. A pretty useless filler episode, unless you're a huge fan of Teddy's. But nicely directed by Kevin McKidd, who IS an excellent director.

[Anela]

I'm not a huge fan of any of them, anymore. I stopped watching entirely, for a long while, and then caught up on Netflix, when I was doing a re-watch, and it automatically started the latest season to be added (a year or two ago). 

[statsgirl]

1 hour ago, Lady Calypso said:

Then they added backstory that probably should have remained on the writing room floor

Torn into thousands of tiny pieces.

[Featherhat]

2 hours ago, statsgirl said:

The more I learn about Teddy, the worse she gets.

Why is the show determined to shove her down my throat as a good person?

My experience of this ep wasn't helped at all by being in the middle of a S6 rewatch and the ridiculousness of Teddy both in theory and in execution. Her love life has always been a juvenile mess so making her somewhat understandable PTSD all about her relationships and excusing everything just makes it worse. Especially when they're pushing the feel sorry for her, she's a good person narrative. 

Grey's and Shondaland in general has many, many relationships that started off in a mess, sometimes with cheating but she's one of the only characters in Grey's who's *never* had an understandable, rootable relationship, except maybe Scott Foley, so it just makes it even worse the "the love of her life" is a retconned at the last minute WTF that doesn't make any sense and is an adulterous relationship as well. And then she named her daughter after her. 

Kim Raver has been good in other stuff but Teddy has alternately annoyed or bored me since "New History" and that awful "I love him and only I understand him but can't be with him due to his PTSD, oh wait I'll scream inappropriately at his girlfriend that I want him then tell on her to him" BS. Owen has been a mess of a character for the same amount of time but at the very least he started off promisingly. 

[iMonrey]

Is there some huge Teddy fanbase I am unaware of? Or perhaps some small but vocal Twitter group that adores Teddy? I cannot fathom how the show could be so tone deaf to think their audience would want an episode entirely devoted to this character. Who knows, perhaps Kim Raver is really popular with the writers and/or producers, and the show realizes her character is unpopular with their audience. But this is exactly the wrong episode to endear her to us. If anything they've only made the problem worse. I guess that speaks to how little they understand the damage they've done to Teddy's integrity and viability for redemption. 

[Anela]

42 minutes ago, iMonrey said:

Is there some huge Teddy fanbase I am unaware of? Or perhaps some small but vocal Twitter group that adores Teddy? I cannot fathom how the show could be so tone deaf to think their audience would want an episode entirely devoted to this character. Who knows, perhaps Kim Raver is really popular with the writers and/or producers, and the show realizes her character is unpopular with their audience. But this is exactly the wrong episode to endear her to us. If anything they've only made the problem worse. I guess that speaks to how little they understand the damage they've done to Teddy's integrity and viability for redemption. 

A post from Kevin McKidd just popped up on facebook, and people seem to like her there. 

[ElectricBoogaloo]

A lot of other shows have done dream episodes, alternate time line episodes, etc. and this one paled in comparison. I alternated between bored and annoyed while watching.

As usual, Owen was a dick. Describing Teddy's PTSD as "the luxury of shutting down," as if having a breakdown is a rational choice. You'd think a doctor would realize that what Teddy is going through is no more her choice than it is for someone who gets cancer. I don't even like Teddy but I got so mad when Owen said that.

I loved that Amelia didn't accept his shitty attitude and refused to back down. Don't get me wrong. I think Teddy has done some shitty things. But Owen is acting like he's some perfect saint who's never made any mistakes. Yes, Teddy cheated on him with Tom but Owen is a cheating cheater who cheated. And yes, she kept the true nature of her relationship with Allison a secret from him but as Amelia pointed out, Owen doesn't go around telling people the worst things he's ever done either.

The fact that Teddy kept it a secret so long seems to indicate how traumatized and hurt she still was about what happened to Allison (I mean, realistically it's been a secret this whole time because the writers decided to add this ridiculous tidbit to her backstory years later). It's not like she told everyone else EXCEPT Owen about Allison. She loved someone who was involved with someone else and then she died in a huge tragedy. I can understand why she wasn't comfortable telling anyone about that.

I guess at least we got to see Deluca again.

2 hours ago, Lady Calypso said:

But nicely directed by Kevin McKidd, who IS an excellent director.

The scene of Teddy kissing Allison and then the camera panning over to the lit candle made me think otherwise. That was about as cliche as it gets.

Edited March 26, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[iMonrey]

Quote

A post from Kevin McKidd just popped up on facebook, and people seem to like her there. 

I tend to think social media has an oversized influence on TV writers. The same problem plagues other shows I watch. Of course, every experience is anecdotal but when everyone you know hates the same character and the show seems to love them for some inexplicable reason it usually turns out there's some vocal fanbase on social media.

[tinderbox]

That’s an hour I will never get back.  Really baaaad episode.   Only saving grace was seeing DeLuca again and the previews for next week.  

[pennben]

7 hours ago, Lady Calypso said:

Though I always will think that Owen is worse than Teddy due to all the things he's done to women in his life throughout the series up until recently, Teddy is only marginally a better person than him because now we're just getting shoved down out throats what a victim Teddy is to love or whatever. I think the biggest issue is that they tore Teddy down to be a despicable person, almost to the level that Owen has been, and then tried giving her sympathy here just because they seemed to realize that they tore her down TOO much. She used to be a decent person before she came back from Germany. Then they added backstory that probably should have remained on the writing room floor and continued to have her make choices that made me SYMPATHIZE with Owen for a hot minute. OWEN. 

There really is something about the Owen & Teddy stories that should be complementary but they just aren’t. Like you, I can’t stand Owen. I always liked Teddy just fine years ago, she wasn’t what I tuned in for, but fine.  I truly don’t understand this story for last season or so, makes no sense to me. 
I guess if they’d done a developed overtime story for Teddy, like they did for Owen, we’d have an interesting contrast between women war doctors v men war doctors and how they handled post-stress of it all & how we view each story and see what it says about us if we forgive/root for/hate which one. 

when did Vernoff leave originally from show? Is she trying to recreate something she had in mind originally that does NOT work now?  
just noodling here.  
 

[cycworker]

16 hours ago, DEL901 said:

All this “Allison = true love” bs bothers me.  Maybe she was, but I think Teddie has a raging case of rose coloured glasses.   They were friends.   They had one perfect night (at least according to Teddie’s memory) declared their love and then Allison died.    But that doesn’t mean their relationship would have lasted.  Who knows if they would still be together.   But unhappy Teddie looks back and sees the past as perfect because the present sucks.  And maybe that’s why no one ever heard about Allison for years.   It wasn’t until Teddie was miserable that she started looking back and idealizing that one moment in her life.  

I don't think it's about her being her true love. It's survivor guilt. 

Despite the show having Teddy stay for breakfast, and Allison  die anyway from exposure to the ash/debris from the towers' collapse, Teddy's version is likely closer to the truth. In fact, had Teddy just stayed for the pancakes, Allison wouldn't have gotten close enough to the area to be exposed to anything. She'd have heard about the attacks before she left, and she'd have stayed home, so she would still be alive today... whether she & Teddy would've stayed together isn't the point, to Teddy. The point is, as far as Teddy is concerned, she is responsible for Allison's death, just as she sees herself as responsible for DeLuca's. 

There are numerous stories of people who have struggled with guilt since 9/11 because they were supposed to be there and because of a fluke, they weren't. This is the opposite... in Teddy's mind, Allison was NOT supposed to be there. In her head, Allison's idea to have pancakes was some kind of intuition to not be down there, and had Teddy just gone with it, Allison would've survived. 

[cycworker]

2 hours ago, pennben said:

There really is something about the Owen & Teddy stories that should be complementary but they just aren’t. Like you, I can’t stand Owen. I always liked Teddy just fine years ago, she wasn’t what I tuned in for, but fine.  I truly don’t understand this story for last season or so, makes no sense to me. 
I guess if they’d done a developed overtime story for Teddy, like they did for Owen, we’d have an interesting contrast between women war doctors v men war doctors and how they handled post-stress of it all & how we view each story and see what it says about us if we forgive/root for/hate which one. 

when did Vernoff leave originally from show? Is she trying to recreate something she had in mind originally that does NOT work now?  
just noodling here.  
 

She left early in Season 7. I have always suspected she had a disagreement with Shonda about the direction a few stories were going to go in. And specifically, I think, despite the line about Cristina in last night's episode, she didn't like the Crowen relationship, and ultimately wanted Owen with Teddy. And if I am right about that, I admit I agree with her. Cristina & Owen never made sense together. 

[30 Helens]

This week, on Ghost’s Anatomy...

What is it with this show? If we’re not watching Meredith on the beach talking to dead people, we’re watching Teddi curled up in bed talking to dead people. Can we please have some interesting conversations between actual living characters and maybe a little forward progress in some of the stories? 

I say let’s kill off Teddi, let Meredith say a quick goodbye to her on the beach, wake up Meredith, and then stop all the wistful hauntings, already.

[Crashcourse]

I agree.  I'm tired of this Ghost Story shit.

[LisaM]

After the last two episodes - which I thought were pretty good - this was a huge drop off of a cliff. While I love seeing Sherri Saum get more work, I have zero interest in more of Teddy's back story and would have preferred that the focus be on some of the other doctors. 

Perhaps the pandemic was the reason behind a story line which involved very few actors and sets? 

Whatever the reason, this was a huge miss. 

[marceline]

Like everyone else, I checked out minutes in. I have no problem with Kim Raver as an actress. I liked her a lot on "Third Watch" but the character of Teddy is a hot bowl of ass. This show did not need more of her. The show would be better served by getting rid of Teddy and bringing back April Kepner. I say this as someone who was very happy to see Kepner's exit.

If I have to choose between these annoying characters I choose April. Or even Arizona. Teddy is not the one.

[stonzeejazz]

Teddy is not Leo's mother.  And I hated this episode.

[Daisy]

Man I read most of the comments here and I still watched it so I have no one to blame but myself about how mad and bored I am LOL

This didn't make me feel sorry for Teddy at all (in fact fact where i used to like her maybe up until she left for Germany it just killed all of that because she was always horrible)

I know everyone doesn't like Owen - I kinda do. (I'll always call him on his crap though). so where I do think he was harsh because she was suffering from a moment of depression (ptsd whatever). and he did deserve a clap back like "hey this happens. and it manifests differently) - Owen still gets to be mad. As far as  I remember, Owen only cheated on Christina. (He wanted to start something WITH Christina so he dumped Beth (poorly. but dumped her). he had that ONS on Christina - but admitted why he did it and they worked on it I'm not excusing the cheating. cheating is wrong and Owen was a butt to do it. (and if i am remembering wrong he's still a butt to have done it) I give Derek/Addison(and even Meredith) crap on the stuff they did back in the day here). 

But i said it before and I'll say it again.
Owen (no one!) deserves to have what happened to them. They make a baby and Teddy names his child after her lover that she was cheating on with her close friend.  That's just groddy and tacky and gross. 

Teddy has an affair with Tom for ages

Teddy sleeps with tom with her phone on and butt dials Owen the day she was gonna get married. 

Owen even brings up the fact that what Teddy said "like i HAVE to marry Owen." (no mention of love or anything just more of it' something to cross off her list like "make chicken, buy diapers, marry Owen." and 

And after all of that did she ever really apologise (from the heart) about any of it? or just more of "I made a  mistake you've gotta forgive me? " 

The way I see it, Owen was being cool and nice about it (for the children)but didn't forgive Teddy and he didn't have to imo and I don't get why Amelia is all "yeah but ya should tho." Like Owen is just being mean to be upset after alll of that. 

[NoReally]

On 3/26/2021 at 10:27 PM, tinderbox said:

That’s an hour I will never get back.  Really baaaad episode.   Only saving grace was seeing DeLuca again and the previews for next week.  

Was it really only an hour? Seemed a lot longer.

[Marley]

Probably the worst episode I’ve ever seen of Greys. Teddy sucks I couldn’t care less what happens to her. She can die for all I care. The only time I kind of liked her was when she was with Henry but that seems to be erased. Altho I’m sure if he lived she would’ve cheated on him eventually. 

[RedbirdNelly]

my dvr missed this due to bad weather reporting so I actually had to put in effort to find and watch this episode--which I only did because when I watch a show, I want to see each episode. 

Midway through I started reading the newspaper--and I get a really crappy newspaper. 

I will say the episode wasn't worse than I expected, so cheers to rising above my horrible expectations. 

I did like Amelia giving her strong opinion to Owen. 

I've never hated Teddy but they drove her character into a terrible corner. The mistake was doing that---kind of like when they had Alex nearly beat Deluca to death and had to find a way for Alex to not spend years in jail. You need to think "where does this lead?" before writing a storyline, which they seem to not have done (unless the goal was for Teddy to leave the show to go somewhere else and restart or die)

[FnkyChkn34]

On 3/27/2021 at 5:29 PM, Daisy said:

Man I read most of the comments here and I still watched it so I have no one to blame but myself about how mad and bored I am LOL

This didn't make me feel sorry for Teddy at all (in fact fact where i used to like her maybe up until she left for Germany it just killed all of that because she was always horrible)

I know everyone doesn't like Owen - I kinda do. (I'll always call him on his crap though). so where I do think he was harsh because she was suffering from a moment of depression (ptsd whatever). and he did deserve a clap back like "hey this happens. and it manifests differently) - Owen still gets to be mad. As far as  I remember, Owen only cheated on Christina. (He wanted to start something WITH Christina so he dumped Beth (poorly. but dumped her). he had that ONS on Christina - but admitted why he did it and they worked on it I'm not excusing the cheating. cheating is wrong and Owen was a butt to do it. (and if i am remembering wrong he's still a butt to have done it) I give Derek/Addison(and even Meredith) crap on the stuff they did back in the day here). 

But i said it before and I'll say it again.
Owen (no one!) deserves to have what happened to them. They make a baby and Teddy names his child after her lover that she was cheating on with her close friend.  That's just groddy and tacky and gross. 

Teddy has an affair with Tom for ages

Teddy sleeps with tom with her phone on and butt dials Owen the day she was gonna get married. 

Owen even brings up the fact that what Teddy said "like i HAVE to marry Owen." (no mention of love or anything just more of it' something to cross off her list like "make chicken, buy diapers, marry Owen." and 

And after all of that did she ever really apologise (from the heart) about any of it? or just more of "I made a  mistake you've gotta forgive me? " 

The way I see it, Owen was being cool and nice about it (for the children)but didn't forgive Teddy and he didn't have to imo and I don't get why Amelia is all "yeah but ya should tho." Like Owen is just being mean to be upset after alll of that. 

I agree with nearly everything you said here. Owen has his faults, but he's not as horrible as Teddy, and I don't mind him.  If Teddy gets to use the PTSD excuse (not trying to be flippant or make light of it as a real condition for people in real life, but I don't think the show did a good job of portraying it here with Teddy at all), then Owen certainly can too (and they did a better job portraying his all those seasons ago).  Amelia can bring it up and remind Owen of his past behavior, that's fair, but it's not the same.  He was triggered by real wartime, post-military-career PTSD, and Teddy was triggered by... losing a patient?  I didn't even really understand what her trigger was since she and Deluca never even interacted.  I agree with those who have said she's severely depressed, not suffering from PTSD.  I'm also not familiar with inflicting PTSD on yourself?  I thought it was when something horrific happened to you, not when you inflicted it all upon yourself, but I could be wrong - I'm sure it's many things.

I am also fairly certain that Owen only cheated on Cristina too; he's only been with her, Amelia, and Teddy, right?  And he hasn't cheated on Teddy.  I don't think he cheated on Amelia either because she's the one who told him to go to Germany to find Teddy.  So... yeah.  He's made mistakes, he's not the best character on the show either, but yikes - Teddy.  Phew.  

[Quark]

This was one of the most boring episodes ever.

[amanda89t]

On 3/30/2021 at 2:20 PM, FnkyChkn34 said:

I agree with nearly everything you said here. Owen has his faults, but he's not as horrible as Teddy, and I don't mind him.  If Teddy gets to use the PTSD excuse (not trying to be flippant or make light of it as a real condition for people in real life, but I don't think the show did a good job of portraying it here with Teddy at all), then Owen certainly can too (and they did a better job portraying his all those seasons ago).  Amelia can bring it up and remind Owen of his past behavior, that's fair, but it's not the same.  He was triggered by real wartime, post-military-career PTSD, and Teddy was triggered by... losing a patient?  I didn't even really understand what her trigger was since she and Deluca never even interacted.  I agree with those who have said she's severely depressed, not suffering from PTSD.  I'm also not familiar with inflicting PTSD on yourself?  I thought it was when something horrific happened to you, not when you inflicted it all upon yourself, but I could be wrong - I'm sure it's many things.

I am also fairly certain that Owen only cheated on Cristina too; he's only been with her, Amelia, and Teddy, right?  And he hasn't cheated on Teddy.  I don't think he cheated on Amelia either because she's the one who told him to go to Germany to find Teddy.  So... yeah.  He's made mistakes, he's not the best character on the show either, but yikes - Teddy.  Phew.  

Owen cheated on Cristina, and then he cheated on Emma with Cristina, and then he cheated on Amelia when they were married and he kissed Teddy on a bench and Teddy stopped him because (the irony) it was wrong, even Amelia tells Tom about it. So yeah, he's a cheating ass himself.

[candall]

I never have much patience with dreams or hallucinations, even though I like Teddy in general.  (Those green, green eyes.  Did you notice?  Lol)

But what made this dross all the worse is that I happened to stumble across an old episode of Grey's (on Lifetime channel) a few hours later. 

It was right after the plane crash.  Cristina went from catatonic to superhero--Sandra Oh should've had an Emmy.  Mark Sloane was heartbreaking.  Callie had to save Derek's hand and put it out of her mind that she'd just approved Arizona's amputation.

 

So damn good.

 

 

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