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Hotel Snarker

S08.E09: The No Bang Theory

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Brandon stands up to his parents; Jovi doesn't believe Yara is pregnant; Mike refuses to plan the wedding; Tarik and Hazel look for a third; Zied learns about Rebecca's ex; Andrew wants Amira to try again; Stephanie admits her secret. Airs January 31, 2021.

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My thoughts on the First Look:

I now know who the worst couple this season is, and it's not even a featured couple: Brandon's parents, Ron and Betty.

When Brandon was telling his parents they need to move out the mom turns immediately to emotionally manipulate her son with her tears. They never try to understand why Julia would want to move, they are only concerned about "losing their son". "She's making us choose". His dad's even more toxic, and is just impossible to reason with.

To them Julia is the enemy. She's the one making them lose their son, making them lose their dream of passing the family farm on, dreams they've projected onto their son and his fiance. When they don't get their way they turn to bargaining. "What about your wedding", "if letting you guys stay together is going to make you stay here then fine".

Even Brandon to some extent is toxic. Him belittling her concerns about being on a farm, "they're just cute animals, why are you so upset about staying here", when it's clear Julia is upset at more than having to take care of the animal. Hey, maybe the fact that she's living in a foreign country with people who have unreasonable expectations for her.

As for Jovi and Yara, why would she tell him that she's pregnant while getting henna? I mean, come on! I was watching Jovi's face and felt like he was trying too hard to stay neutral or something. That poor henna lady.

And the scene with Stephanie and Ryan was just incredibly awkward.

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5 hours ago, Hotel Snarker said:

When they don't get their way they turn to bargaining. "What about your wedding", "if letting you guys stay together is going to make you stay here then fine".

What's even more interesting is that it's not "they"--it's only Mother Brandon agreeing to letting them stay in the same room; Father Brandon is having none of it.  I'm looking forward to watching that play out.

When Brandon first told them about moving out, for a second there I felt sorry for Mother Brandon because I those tears seemed real.  But I think it was actually just shock, and she quickly went into scheming mode, and I started watching just for entertainment.

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2 hours ago, AZChristian said:

'Cause they don't have any crocodiles on the farm?

I was seriously trying to think of which animal to use, lol. thanks.

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10 hours ago, Hotel Snarker said:

Even Brandon to some extent is toxic. Him belittling her concerns about being on a farm, "they're just cute animals, why are you so upset about staying here", when it's clear Julia is upset at more than having to take care of the animal. Hey, maybe the fact that she's living in a foreign country with people who have unreasonable expectations for her.

I am not sure how he thinks this compromise will work.   He gets them discussing agreeing to changing the sleeping arrangements, but he never mentions her issues with feeding the cute animals.  I think she hates feeding the animals more than not sleeping with Brandon even though it appears she has to sleep in a storage room.

 

10 hours ago, Hotel Snarker said:

My thoughts on the First Look:

I now know who the worst couple this season is, and it's not even a featured couple: Brandon's parents, Ron and Betty.

True.

I am annoyed that the First Look devoted so much time to the Long Island Medium. 

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Mom and Pop Brandon sure have the GOAT tears and anger at the ready in case the son decides to speak up for himself. Brandon probably hasn't done much of that, and they treat him as though he is 13 and not a young man who is closer to 30 than 20. It's not like Julia is at a job interview and if the folks at the company don't treat her well or set off any red flags, she can walk away and not take any job offer. She is marrying a dude and by proximity, sort of his family. Mom sure turned on the manipulative waterworks because her little boy wants to go away. Mom, you should be grateful that he is moving out and you have your life back! There was no real reason for the severity of the Dad's anger in that Julia has to stay in the storage closet.

Maybe mom and dad can each spend a half day with Julia or an evening or whatever and get to know her. I might think some animals are cute but I sure wouldn't want to look after them. Yes, there is a chicken pilot project here, but I don't really want them in my yard. Julia did not move here to live on the farm. She is a city girl. Take her to the city, take her shopping or out for lunch or to the hair salon, etc. If the dad sells cars or whatever, Julia would probably prefer being the bubbly receptionist at the dealership.

Wasn't too interested in Mike and Natalie. At least the suitcase moved to the couch this time. Whether Mom Mike likes Natalie or not, Mike wants her. She has to live with it. Maybe she is a bit more accommodating because Mike isn't 22 years old. She seems to be more of a wait and see type.

Yara, telling your boyfriend that you are pregnant when you are getting your hands henna-ed is not a great idea. I felt sorry for the poor artist having to listen to her go on about it. It was really an inappropriate time and place. Is Jovi going to be happy? Maybe not? Are you happy, Yara? You have moved to a new country, your fiance works one month and then has another month off, you have observed that he drinks a lot and may be moving toward being an alcoholic or already is one. That is something that you need to consider if you wish to marry him. He may or may not stop drinking when you are married, and now, insta-baby. That is a lot of both of your plates. Both of you seem immature and don't have much to offer a kid. You barely know each other.

Seems like Ryan is checking out. Guess the alleged $3000 watch, the expensive clothes and shoes, etc. didn't get him to rise to the occasion. I'd prefer the cash too compared to the junk she gives him. Yeah, it's a nice thought but maybe go shopping with him and pay for the items or give him a prepaid Visa or Mastercard so he can get what he wants. He even got a look at the ring you want him to propose with! Probably calling his friends who can switch out the real diamonds with fakes as fast as possible. Those will sell better. People do get upset stomachs. She flew in, was tired, etc. I'd also have a hard time believing that my younger fiance didn't even look at another woman in 10 months. His only interest is in getting the money and crap and then moving to the US, where he will be gone faster than she can hula-hoop.

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Although we didn’t see “Tarzel” in the first look, I have a solution to their sleeping arrangements. Let Auri continue to sleep in her father’s bed and Hazel and her girlfriend can sleep in the other bedroom. 

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1 hour ago, mamadrama said:

Brandon isn't nearly as cute and endearing as he thinks he is. 

Unless he moves out and discovers who he is, he will bring his parents’ relationship dynamics to his own.

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13 hours ago, greekmom said:

I would think Julia would have been fine with not doing farm chores and being allowed in the kitchen (which Betty has barred her from)

Wait what? When did that air about the kitchen? They're probably afraid Julia would clean it ! So Mach hoarding filth.

Edited by Alonzo Mosely FBI
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13 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Julia did not move here to live on the farm. She is a city girl. Take her to the city, take her shopping or out for lunch or to the hair salon, etc. If the dad sells cars or whatever, Julia would probably prefer being the bubbly receptionist at the dealership.

Can't you just see it?  A young couple with hardly any money asks to see used cars.  She wants something with four doors and practical.  He spies a 2-door sporty little thing that costs quite a bit more.  As she points out that they have a baby on the way and need something that will easily accommodate getting the baby and its gear in and out of the back seat, Ron looks at the husband, puts his finger in his face, and yells, "You need to stand up and be the MAN of the house.  YOU tell HER which car you're going to buy."

I maintain that Ron and Betty have some type of strong financial hold over Brandon.  Perhaps they've threatened to call in what he owes them if he (a) moves off the farm, or (b) doesn't provide them with free labor (from himself or a designee with whom he cannot sleep).  I still can't figure out why Brandon and Julia don't just go to a Justice of the Peace and get married.  That would solve the sleeping arrangements.

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3 hours ago, AZChristian said:

Can't you just see it?  A young couple with hardly any money asks to see used cars.  She wants something with four doors and practical.  He spies a 2-door sporty little thing that costs quite a bit more.  As she points out that they have a baby on the way and need something that will easily accommodate getting the baby and its gear in and out of the back seat, Ron looks at the husband, puts his finger in his face, and yells, "You need to stand up and be the MAN of the house.  YOU tell HER which car you're going to buy."

I maintain that Ron and Betty have some type of strong financial hold over Brandon.  Perhaps they've threatened to call in what he owes them if he (a) moves off the farm, or (b) doesn't provide them with free labor (from himself or a designee with whom he cannot sleep).  I still can't figure out why Brandon and Julia don't just go to a Justice of the Peace and get married.  That would solve the sleeping arrangements.

I have a 4 door car. I most likely would not be able to open the door in my single garage if it was two doors. Part of my test drive of the vehicle involved me bringing it home to see if it fit inside the garage. The sleazy salesman would try to sell two cars to the couple. The sporty one and the other mini SUV. The dude would have to wait a couple of years for the sports car.

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3 hours ago, AZChristian said:

I still can't figure out why Brandon and Julia don't just go to a Justice of the Peace and get married.  That would solve the sleeping arrangements.

I recall when they told Julia the sleeping arrangements were because they weren’t married her reaction was, “So why don’t we go get married?” Betty and Ron quickly squashed the idea. I’ve wondered about the “noise in the next bedroom” issue, instead of Brandon’s boyhood bedroom, why couldn’t they move into the room assigned to Julia, after cleaning it out, of course. 

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Does anyone really think Julia will be fine with shoveling pig shit and feeding ravenous goats before sunrise as long as she gets to move in with Brandon?

I am not ready to blame all of their problems on Parents Brandon (who definitely suck, don’t get me wrong). I think Brandon is selfish and is responsible for a lot of Julia’s unhappiness. Every time they show her in that storage room crowded with garbage, I wonder why Brandon couldn’t have taken that room and let Julia sleep somewhere that isn’t filled with buckets of hot tub chemicals or livestock feed.

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The first look is on Friday at 10 pm EST. I get the east coast feed, so it is on at 8 pm MST. Check your tv listings.

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18 hours ago, greekmom said:

Betcha one of those watches that if Stephanie said she's decided to marry Harrison and bring him to the States, Ryan will close his eyes and think of America.

No thanks.  I'm not into no-stakes gambling.

 

24 minutes ago, magemaud said:

 I’ve wondered about the “noise in the next bedroom” issue, instead of Brandon’s boyhood bedroom, why couldn’t they move into the room assigned to Julia, after cleaning it out, of course. 

This has driven me crazy the entire time.  I'm not sure of the floor plan, but it sure looks like only one of those bedrooms shares a wall with Parents Brandon.  So...problem solved.

 

15 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Where are you watching the First Look? Don’t see it on the TLC app. Thanks in advance.

I watched it on good old teevee.

 

18 hours ago, greekmom said:

They need to stop trying to make Discovery+ happen.

Word.  There's no way in the world I would pay extra to watch anything related to this show.  What I already watch rots my brain enough. 

Actually, I have a free year of Discovery+ available to me, and I'm not gonna do it.  But I'm sure I'm in the minority, and plenty of people will pay to have 50,000 episodes of reruns. 

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47 minutes ago, magemaud said:

I recall when they told Julia the sleeping arrangements were because they weren’t married her reaction was, “So why don’t we go get married?” Betty and Ron quickly squashed the idea. I’ve wondered about the “noise in the next bedroom” issue, instead of Brandon’s boyhood bedroom, why couldn’t they move into the room assigned to Julia, after cleaning it out, of course. 

Sadly, I think this IS cleaned out already.  They just have SO MUCH "stuff" in that house.

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1 hour ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Where are you watching the First Look? Don’t see it on the TLC app. Thanks in advance.

word of caution, about halfway through, they sneak in a preview of a new Discovery+ show. Friday night it was Long Island Medium. Last week it was Toddlers and Tiaras "where are they now" 

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8 hours ago, KateHearts said:

I have a different take on it. I think the driving force of "The Farm" and its significance is Betty's.  In the scenario I imagine, Ron- twice divorced and getting older, meets up with Betty, never-married and also getting older (maybe they worked together. I see this with doctors frequently). He is lonely, she is willing, and they get married. Betty is an "animal person,"

 

I see it the other way because from what I understand, the horse life and the dog breeder life, was a Family Ron thing not what Betty brought.  I suspect Ron is largely estranged from his other kids. So it's huge that Brandon gets "it all" and better appreciate it and better let Ron control him so this child gets it cuz he acts right! 

1 hour ago, magemaud said:

word of caution, about halfway through, they sneak in a preview of a new Discovery+ show. Friday night it was Long Island Medium. Last week it was Toddlers and Tiaras "where are they now" 

Sadly I watched every minute of the Toddlers & Tiara's show on + I couldn't shut it off! 

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22 hours ago, greekmom said:

They need to stop trying to make Discovery+ happen.

I don’t even know what the hell that means.  Too boot, they had to put Theresa Cavuto on for almost an hour.  I can’t stand her.

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19 hours ago, mamadrama said:

Brandon isn't nearly as cute and endearing as he thinks he is. 

Brandon and his Mother have the same face, unfortunately.  I’m still mad about Mother Brandon not allowing Julia to have a morning cup of tea while she drank her coffee.  Julia shouldn’t have let her get away with that.

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4 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

The first look is on Friday at 10 pm EST. I get the east coast feed, so it is on at 8 pm MST. Check your tv listings.

So, the First Look shows new things?  Is that what we were watching when Theresa Caputo came on for Discovery + ?   Very confusing.

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Just now, Silver Bells said:

So, the First Look shows new things?  Is that what we were watching when Theresa Caputo came on for Discovery + ?   Very confusing.

The first look runs from 8 to about 8:25 MST for me. The Discovery plus stuff probably runs for an hour. Adjust to your time zone.

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Brandon’s parents are absolutely the worst people ever on this show (well, his dad is ... I think mom has serious battered wife symptoms -- ETA emotional/mental, not physical). And that’s saying a lot.  

I actually want to watch the Toddlers and Tiaras update. Don’t judge! T/T (along with Showbiz Moms and Dads) was my TWOP gateway drug.

But the fact that they forced an hour of unbearable Long Island Medium down my throat in what was ostensibly 90DF (no matter how heinous this season’s people are) pissed me off. Glad I recorded it so I could FF. 

 

Edited by PamelaMaeSnap · Reason: To clarify one point and fix a word that I couldn't think of on another one.
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4 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

No thanks.  I'm not into no-stakes gambling.

 

This has driven me crazy the entire time.  I'm not sure of the floor plan, but it sure looks like only one of those bedrooms shares a wall with Parents Brandon.  So...problem solved.

 

I watched it on good old teevee.

 

Word.  There's no way in the world I would pay extra to watch anything related to this show.  What I already watch rots my brain enough. 

Actually, I have a free year of Discovery+ available to me, and I'm not gonna do it.  But I'm sure I'm in the minority, and plenty of people will pay to have 50,000 episodes of reruns. 

What channels cover Discovery + ?  I don’t get this whole Discovery thing.

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11 minutes ago, Silver Bells said:

What channels cover Discovery + ?  I don’t get this whole Discovery thing.

Ok, I just looked up Discovery +. It’s a donation for certain charities including UNICEF.  It’s a bunch of certain channels .. TLC one of them.  Starting at $5.99 a month, one dollar goes to a charity.  Someone correct me If I’m wrong.

Edited by Silver Bells

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22 minutes ago, Frozendiva said:

The first look runs from 8 to about 8:25 MST for me. The Discovery plus stuff probably runs for an hour. Adjust to your time zone.

So, you are paying $5.99 to watch your favorite program for one hour instead of 25 minutes ?  Plus, one dollar goes to charity.

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Discovery + is a streaming service of Discovery and HGTV, and their fellow channels, all owned by the same group.   They have thousands of reruns of TLC, Discovery, HGTV shows, and new stuff.   Right now it's $4.99 a month for shows with ads, and $6.99 without ads.      They also have the 90 day spin offs (Pillow talk, Tell alls) and some original programming, for new stuff like the Property Brothers: Forever Home, and Ben Napier's wood working show, and others.   However, the Fixer Upper/Magnolia stuff is still supposed to be on their own channel (Magnolia network, formerly the DIY network, but who knows if that will change for more content for the streaming service).   

I didn't see anything about charity.     It's also only available to U.S. viewers for now.  

I'm hoping they don't start doing all of the new episodes only on the streaming services, because I'm not going to do streaming. 

I would hate to miss out on first runs of 90 Day, and not see Brandon's mother have meltdowns over his sex life. 

Edited by CrazyInAlabama
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3 minutes ago, Silver Bells said:

So, you are paying $5.99 to watch your favorite program for one hour instead of 25 minutes ?  Plus, one dollar goes to charity.

Nope. I am in Canada and have no access to Discovery plus unless it is a preview show on TLC. The weekly episode first look is on TLC Friday evening. The regular 2 hour show is Sunday night. 

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9 minutes ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

Discovery + is a streaming service of Discovery and HGTV, and their fellow channels, all owned by the same group.   They have thousands of reruns of TLC, Discovery, HGTV shows, and new stuff.   Right now it's $4.99 a month for shows with ads, and $6.99 without ads.      They also have the 90 day spin offs (Pillow talk, Tell alls) and some original programming, for new stuff like the Property Brothers: Forever Home, and Ben Napier's wood working show, and others.  

 

Thank you all for explaining it so perfectly.

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Natalie is so nice now that she doesn’t have the ring.  If she gets it and gets married,  her head will spill around and make Mike miserable, like she did in the Ukraine.  It’s all up to him.

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Brandon should have never brought her over without his own place.  He should have settled moving out and let his parents adjust before proceeding.  No way Julia was going to love farm life and no way she wouldn't become the focus of his parents anger. 

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Unfortunately I don’t see a happy ending for any of these couples. Just break ups, divorces and sadly maybe a child or two involved. 

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Natalie HAS to go to a speech therapist and stop talking thru her teeth.  It’s driving me crazy.  Why can’t she open her mouth like a normal person?

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52 minutes ago, Silver Bells said:

Natalie HAS to go to a speech therapist and stop talking thru her teeth.  It’s driving me crazy.  Why can’t she open her mouth like a normal person?

She's suppressing the bulk of her hatred to get that sweet green card for true love.

Edited by Jack Sampson
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Natalie is certainly no prize, but I don’t understand why Mike agreed to bring her over on the K-1 if he doesn’t want to marry her. It’s not like they were happy when she first got here. He seemed over it the last time he was getting his hair cut, before Natalie even arrived.

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13 hours ago, KateHearts said:

I have a different take on it. I think the driving force of "The Farm" and its significance is Betty's.  In the scenario I imagine, Ron- twice divorced and getting older, meets up with Betty, never-married and also getting older (maybe they worked together. I see this with doctors frequently). He is lonely, she is willing, and they get married. Betty is an "animal person," and has never had children, and strikes a deal with Ron, who has some money... she wants a "farm" where she can live out her hobby and love for animals, and she will keep him company even though he hasn't been able to hang on to a couple of wives before him- possibly for obvious reasons (domineering, etc). He indulges her; she has her farm and then -surprisingly- becomes pregnant with her one and only child, whom she indulges endlessly and on whom she hinges all of her love and hopes (in part because her husband isn't all that likable).  Her dream is to pass on her "farm" to her one and only smothered little man-boy, and the best way to keep him close and ensure that her beloved "farm" is kept up as she ages, she gives him a free place to stay and his own room with a plaque with his name on the door.  Brandon can't say no to his mom (although we can see by his rather blank expression when she cries that she's used this manipulative tactic over and over again throughout his life) so he capitulates. He doesn't really want to move away. You can see it in his face.  He's torn between two lovers- Mom and Julia.  He is unable to say "I'm an adult and want to make a life with my fiancée"- that could kill Mama.  Instead he blames Julia and says "it's the animals." It's not the animals. It's the work, the high expectations, the constant overseeing, the rules as if they are children. He will never be able to point that out to his parents; this has been their dance forever and it's not going to change.

 

I see this. 

6 minutes ago, nutella fitzgerald said:

Natalie is certainly no prize, but I don’t understand why Mike agreed to bring her over on the K-1 if he doesn’t want to marry her. It’s not like they were happy when she first got here. He seemed over it the last time he was getting his hair cut, before Natalie even arrived.

Yes!!! Why did he have her come over??

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7 minutes ago, CruiseDiva said:

To get laid.

Id think there are far cheaper and easier ways to get laid! Apps for example. I wonder how much sex they are having- they sound like they can’t stand each other (and not in a way that would make “hate sex” hot). 

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3 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

Natalie is so nice now that she doesn’t have the ring.  If she gets it and gets married,  her head will spill around and make Mike miserable, like she did in the Ukraine.  It’s all up to him.

They both seem to relish in their push-pull relationship.  They can have each other.

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