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S08.E05: Who's The Boss?


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On 1/4/2021 at 11:17 PM, toomuchtv said:

My anniversary is May 10th, the year we got married it was the day before Mother’s Day. The thought didn’t even cross our minds when planning and neither of our mothers brought it up. I’m not sure if it even occurred to me until our first anniversary was on Mother’s Day that year and we were trying to find a restaurant and they were all overrun with families celebrating. Now that I’m a mom of young kids our anniversary gets overlooked in favor of Mother’s Day. That could change when they grow up. 

Our first choice of wedding day was May 10 (1975) and Mother's Day was the next day. Our priest suggested we change it to the following Saturday, May 17, which we did because on the weekend of Mother's Day he advised us that it would be next to impossible to get flowers and even a cake would be iffy. One week later was no big deal.

That said, I really felt bad for Julia. Future mother-in-law Betty is an insufferable bitch who doesn't seem to realize Mother's Day is the second Sunday in May every year and can fall as late as mid-May.

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8 hours ago, Lily247 said:

There is also a heavy expectation coming from Russia that the area they will live in will be "walkable", meaning you can access everything you need by foot. Not the case in the vast majority of the US and I wish these knuckleheads would just understand this before deciding to come to the US. 

I knew someone who came here for a medical residency from India, and couldn't understand why he didn't have public transportation from his apartment in the suburbs into the city for work.  I was surprised he didn't look into that before choosing his apartment. He was truly puzzled about the suburbs- despite the fact that he had a brother who had come a few years before and was also living in a suburb of a large city.

 

8 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:

he women should be grateful, not the men? 

Yeah, I don't get how people like Mike, Tarik and to some extent Jovi don't prepare for the "loves of their lives" to come- get some new clean towels, stock the cabinets with their favorite tea, clean up the laundry on the floor.  

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I actually paid for this season via YouTube so I could discuss it with my teenage niece, who's obsessed. I don't have cable and up until recently I was able to watch uploaded episodes on YouTube for free, but I guess TLC cracked down on that.

I understand that living in America is the ultimate fantasy for a LOT of non-Americans, so much so that they'll do nearly anything, including hook up with an American, to get here. Maybe I'm just old, or a pragmatist, or both, but...if I was going to leave everything and everyone I know to live in America or really any other country, unless I was literally fleeing for my life I'd do as much research as I possibly could BEFORE leaving. (Simply being poor might not be enough, e.g. Rosemarie (who seems to be doing fine).) And then, once I arrived, if the situation wasn't exactly as I'd pictured (and it NEVER is), unless I was in an abusive situation I'd do my best to make the best out of my situation. Love ain't that blind...or again, maybe I'm just old, or maybe I've never been in that kind of love, I don't know.

Brandon/Julia: Julia's behaving incredibly well for someone whose fiance largely misrepresented his situation. She had a mini-snap this episode but at some point I think she's going to have a major snap and that's when we'll find out whether there's a man inside that man-boy she's engaged to. Also: How is it possible for Brandon and his parents to all have full-time jobs outside the farm? Is Aspen their employee? I know just enough about farming to know that it's a helluva lot of work...why would you keep all those animals if you weren't going to be working with them yourself? Did his parents just go to work expecting Julia to pick up their slack?

Mike/Natalie: Without knowing much about the type of women in Sequim and surrounding areas, I have to believe that the only reason Mike hasn't completely kicked Natalie to the curb is that he's blinded by her beauty. It's a song as old as time. Also, I don't eat a lot of red meat, but that tomahawk looked good as hell. And speaking of food...

Tarik/Hazel: Guess who's been eating congee nearly every breakfast since the cold weather rolled in? This woman (fiftysomething African-American). The only sweet thing I have for breakfast is the sugar in my coffee. Hazel's already stated she's overwhelmed...let the girl get acclimated, shit. Also I'm trying to understand what it's going to be like to care for a stepdaughter (ASD or not; my teenage niece happens to be ASD) while your biological son is still in the Philippines. I thought I saw something indicating that Tarik was providing support. And speaking of support...

Ryan/Stephanie: She's basically supporting him and his family in exchange for marriage, but she can't get him on the phone. Okay, Stephanie.

Zied/Rebecca: Does Zied need to know that he's living in the same building that Rebecca lived in with her ex? Is it the same apartment? Sheesh. Also, I like Zied's sister (Wiem). She's like: I don't like her, I never did like her, I'm never going to like her. LOL.

Jovi/Yara: I've got nothing. They can both go away at any time.

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12 hours ago, Sile said:

I'll add to the growing list with St. Looie.

Same with Minnesota - It is just Minnesota, not Minne-SEW-TAH, and it is Minneapolis, not Minne-YAP-olis.  And no, not a lot of people talk like the cast in Fargo.  Sure, upstate and in the some of the farming communities you will get a "Yeah, let's keep an eye on dem crops" but no, we don't all walk around in parkas saying "Yeah, YOU BETCHA!" at all. 

Thank you for coming to my Minnesota Ted Talk.  I could go on, but I need to get to work, lol.

18 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

In Boston the dead giveaway is "Beantown".

No one I know calls it that, either.  That would be wicked wrong.  Are you staying fah apaht during the Covid?  (Sorry, could not resist!)

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47 minutes ago, ExMathMajor said:

Brandon/Julia: Also: How is it possible for Brandon and his parents to all have full-time jobs outside the farm? Is Aspen their employee? I know just enough about farming to know that it's a helluva lot of work...why would you keep all those animals if you weren't going to be working with them yourself? Did his parents just go to work expecting Julia to pick up their slack?

Mike/Natalie: Without knowing much about the type of women in Sequim and surrounding areas, I have to believe that the only reason Mike hasn't completely kicked Natalie to the curb is that he's blinded by her beauty. It's a song as old as time.

Aspen HAS to be an employee.  They keep referring to her as their "friend," but I don't know a lot of "friends" who would shovel animal crap and do all that farm work for free every day while the Brandon family goes to real jobs.  But, then, they haven't said anything (that we've seen) about paying Brandon's fiancée to work on the farm.  I know we don't get all the details about any of the couples, but this farm situation could use some explanations.

Regarding Sequim, it's quite a popular retirement area.  The average age of residents is 57.  (The average age for the whole USA is 38).  The average age of residents of Seattle (where Mike works) is 36.  He'd have been smarter to look for someone closer to home who would know what the temperature, etc., is like.  If he was blinded by her beauty, his eyesight must have been pretty bad from the start.

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13 hours ago, Lily247 said:

Nearly all of the Russian/Ukrainian women in this franchise have a deep, deep issue with not living in NYC, Miami, or LA.

The irony is, I would not want to live in any of those cities and I have been in all of them.  Population density, traffic, and crime are bad, and at least in the case of NYC and LA you have ridiculous cost of living (though where I am it's even worse than LA but this is where I'm from).  These foreigners have a very fanciful view of these cities and don't realize that a city like Kansas City, Austin, or Charleston is a far better place to live.

Edited by Dobian
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36 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

Aspen HAS to be an employee.  They keep referring to her as their "friend," but I don't know a lot of "friends" who would shovel animal crap and do all that farm work for free every day while the Brandon family goes to real jobs.  But, then, they haven't said anything (that we've seen) about paying Brandon's fiancée to work on the farm.  I know we don't get all the details about any of the couples, but this farm situation could use some explanations.

Regarding Sequim, it's quite a popular retirement area.  The average age of residents is 57.  (The average age for the whole USA is 38).  The average age of residents of Seattle (where Mike works) is 36.  He'd have been smarter to look for someone closer to home who would know what the temperature, etc., is like.  If he was blinded by her beauty, his eyesight must have been pretty bad from the start.

For some reason I'm thinking Mike inherited the farm?  Probably Uncle Bo was a bonus.  Lol

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27 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

For some reason I'm thinking Mike inherited the farm?  Probably Uncle Bo was a bonus.  Lol

I think he bought it from his parents.  They (as far as I can tell) are both still living, but now live north of Seattle.  Maybe Beau was part of the price negotiation.  LOL.

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They can't pay Julia to work on the farm, unless a K-1 visa includes a work permit (I really don't know very much about that).     I'm looking forward to Julia having hysterics when the animals come near her looking for food, and to get attention, and she runs away.  

Edited by CrazyInAlabama
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1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

Aspen HAS to be an employee.  They keep referring to her as their "friend," but I don't know a lot of "friends" who would shovel animal crap and do all that farm work for free every day while the Brandon family goes to real jobs. 

I agree. She was wearing a polo shirt with a German Shepherd on it and her hair appeared to be covering a logo. In the pictures we’ve seen of the farm, there seems to be a separate building where she might live in exchange for doing the chores and taking care of the dogs 

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This is the most joyless set of couples ever.  I sense not a shred of undying love between any of them, with the possible exception of needy Rebecca and Stephanie, who are clinging to these men like life boats on the Titanic.  In fact, there is open hostility with some of them: Mike and Natalie, Jovi and Yara. The only fun couple are Betty and Ron, Brandon’s parents, she even laughlingly admitted her main fear of Brandon and Julia sharing a room was so “we don’t have to hear anything”, implying they are not morally opposed to them having sex, they just don’t want the “trauma” of hearing their son whooping it up on the other side of the wall.  I predict none of them will follow through with a marriage, and I sincerely hope they do not.

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6 hours ago, Dobian said:

Kansas City, Austin, or Charleston is a far better place to live.

Charleston is the number one choice for me to move to for retirement, it is not my husband's choice...I will miss him. LOL.

 

I get the feeling that the lack of education and lack of knowledge of US geography plays a big part in the surprise upon arrival.  Why they do not investigate anything on line is beyond me and that is on them, the local person not fully explaining their life style cannot be upset by the import expressing their disapointment.

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5 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

They can't pay Julia to work on the farm, unless a K-1 visa includes a work permit (I really don't know very much about that).     I'm looking forward to Julia having hysterics when the animals come near her looking for food, and to get attention, and she runs away.  

Phone message:

"Hi, Julia.  This is Brandon's mom.  Your 'allowance' for this week is on the floor under the table.  See you when we get home.  Please make sure dinner is ready at 6:00 sharp!!!."

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1 hour ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Charleston is the number one choice for me to move to for retirement, it is not my husband's choice...I will miss him. LOL.

 

I get the feeling that the lack of education and lack of knowledge of US geography plays a big part in the surprise upon arrival.  Why they do not investigate anything on line is beyond me and that is on them, the local person not fully explaining their life style cannot be upset by the import expressing their disapointment.

LMAO about Charleston!

I think you're right about lack of knowledge, but today there really is no excuse for not finding out. You can find out just about everything about just about everything online or Google. I could understand not knowing much back in the dark ages when I was young!!

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18 hours ago, christmaslights said:

I would feel stupid saying nawlins 

I say new orlins

but I don't say new orleens

I also don't say cali. I get a weird shiver when someone says that.

Please don’t refer to Boston as Beantown. That’s a dead giveaway.

Oops, I see @Pepper Mostly already covered that. There’s always Worcester (as in Worcestershire Sauce). It’s pronounced Wuster, not Worchester.

Edited by Auntie Anxiety
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6 hours ago, maxmama said:

implying they are not morally opposed to them having sex, they just don’t want the “trauma” of hearing their son whooping it up on the other side of the wall.

Brandon can buy his parents a huge jar of earplugs for their anniversary (which I HOPE isn’t on a Hallmark holiday!)to keep on their nightstand.

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On 1/4/2021 at 3:12 PM, Kath94 said:

My father's birthday was in June, and my mother's in May.  I always considered a conspiracy to drain my wallet every year.  😄

My dad's birthday was August 21st and my mom's was August 22nd!

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On 1/5/2021 at 7:39 AM, Chickabiddy said:

And if their undergrad students can walk around the city quite safely, I think street smart Yara from Ukraine can handle New Orleans on her own. 😘

I don't know how street smart Yara is, but I do think there's a difference between walking around alone in the city where you go to college and walking around alone in a city you have no ties to, and perhaps more important, continuing to be alone once you get home.

I remember the first time I went to New York City alone, in the late 1980s.  I lived in Texas and had been twice before I think, both times with friends.  This time I was also going with a friend, but she had to cancel on short notice, and I was left with the decision whether to go by myself.  A few years before that, I'd backpacked around Europe by myself (when I was 25), but going to NYC alone seemed daunting (perhaps because it wasn't a "vacation" and wouldn't be teeming with other kids doing exactly the same thing, like Europe was).  I decided to go for it, and it turned out fine.  But it was a real decision.

And I don't think it's that unusual for people to not want to do things by themselves.  I've had friends who would never go out to dinner alone, or to a movie by themselves, even in their own city.  Yara's in a new and very unfamiliar city, which some of us might find exciting, but not everyone.  And even I might be disinclined to make the best of things if I were mad that my fiance abandoned me for four weeks.  She moved there to be with him, and she's not getting to be.

 

On 1/3/2021 at 9:27 PM, Frozendiva said:

Not too excited about the root beer float or eating at a brewery type place.

I think that was a language issue, because he was having to explain to her that there wasn't alcohol in root beer. 

I don't like root beer floats (but love Coke floats, if you let them sit long enough to form a crust on the foam), so that's a non-starter for me.  I drink beer occasionally, but don't love it.  So if we go to a brewery that doesn't have a huckleberry beer for me, I'm happy they have brewed root beer for me--I get to act like one of the adults.  😀

 

On 1/3/2021 at 9:27 PM, Frozendiva said:

Mike's steak looked good and if he can afford it, eat it. If he wants to go vegetarian, he will. Can't force him to not eat meat.

One think I like about eating at brewery places is that they'll generally cook a hamburger to order.  I like them rare, and it's a real treat when I can actually get one still kicking.  Unfortunately, unlike the root beer option, that doesn't really help Natalie.

But I don't get the one week on/one week off thing on eating meat.  Wouldn't it be better to just alternate days?  Like if you eat meat on a given day, then don't eat meat on the next?  Or two days on and one day off?  Seems to me that would be a lot easier to manage and tolerate than going a whole week at a time.

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Brandon and Julia: I don’t think their wedding day is insensitive to the parents. Brandon’s mother is very insensitive. The 9th has significance to Julia, but Brandon's mom don't want it to over shadow Mother's Day. Doesn’t she realize Mother's Day falls on a different date every year? Plus, you don't need the whole weekend for Mother's day. Betty is being selfish.

Aside from their desired wedding date, it was wrong on every level to expect Julia to jump right into farm chores the third day she was there, and by herself to boot. The "friend" that was "helping" Julia with the farm chores wasn't helping at all. She was just managing Julia. 

I don't blame Julia for feeling how she feels. She gets left out all the time, her opinion is not important to them, and Brandon's parents only think about them and what they want but it's not their life. Also, I really didn't like the fact that Brandon came home and didn't even say hi to Julia, that's sad. 

 

Cougar Stephanie and Ryan:  I think Stephanie is insane for paying Ryan’s wages. All she is to him and his family is a piggy bank. If she is stupid enough to do it, then there’s no one to blame but herself. 

Also, I wonder how much she pays his cousin... 🤔 💰 🍆 

 

Mike and Natalie: I think Natalie was asking too much of Mike. She shouldn't expect him to change for her. She knows he likes meat and he is not religious. If those two things are dealbreakers for her, then just move on. Why be miserable and make him miserable?

 

Tarik and Hazel: O, for cryin’ out loud. I say just do the church thing—it is not gonna hurt a nonbeliever. I’d be way more concerned about that fundamental difference in core beliefs than where I made a public commitment.

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On 1/5/2021 at 4:07 PM, LucyEth said:

Yara is the new Pao, she belongs in Los Angeles with the Kardashians, she is too good for New Orleans

 

You mean New Orleans is too good for HER.

 

It has also been posted several times that Aspen is supposedly actually Betty’s sister and her real name is Ashley or something similar.

Edited by GrammyPammy
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Last week’s countdown to Discovery+ was obnoxious enough, do we really need the “streaming available now” notice in the upper corner of our screen and several ads for it at every commercial break? 

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I couldn’t wait for the next episode thread to ask what is up with Rebecca’s hair? I see she’s still wearing her leather jacket.

new drinking game: take a shot whenever she mentions Zied’s age

Also, I thought Yara’s pink eyeshadow looked awful until I saw Tiffany’s 

2FCF0D0E-9AFB-45DE-9BCE-3F78DF63F001.jpeg

Edited by magemaud
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On 1/5/2021 at 10:21 PM, LennieBriscoe said:

 

Big Mike brings over a religious vegetarian, plunks her down in the 1950s, and stuffs his giant maw with a (probably tasty, but beside the point) hunk o'meat while stating how non-religious he is. Now, both parties here are autonomous and entitled to beliefs, blah, blah, but is there no compromise to be considered on his part, only hers? 

The women should be grateful, not the men? 

I don't know any Russian or Ukrainian immigrant mail- or Internet-order brides, so I am personal-anecdote-free. 

 

If religion was a deal breaker for Natalie, she should have broken it off with him. He doesn't care what religion she ascribes to it what her eating habits are because he is on the liberal side of these things. You can't force someone to take on your religion just because you want them to, or not to enjoy their meat if that is their lifestyle. Natalie needs to break it off instead of trying to make a square peg fit into a round hole. They are completely different people, she is pretentious and wants a healthy eating/citylife/church lifestyle and he is fundamentally not any of those things. I think he is a nice, calm guy, an average Joe, who would be better suited to a low maintenance women from Washington, and Natalie needs to take several chill pills. 

She is in it because she is nearing 40 and wants to have kids, and in Ukraine she'd have  no shot. 

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On 1/6/2021 at 3:15 AM, CruiseDiva said:

Future mother-in-law Betty is an insufferable bitch who doesn't seem to realize Mother's Day is the second Sunday in May every year and can fall as late as mid-May.

I was watching Father Knows Best just yesterday, and Bud had inadvertently scheduled a date on his mother's birthday, which they were going to celebrate at home.  The girl he had the date with made him promise not to break their date (she was a real pill), so when Bud realized there was a conflict, he tried to get his parents to go out to dinner by themselves instead, and his mom said she'd rather spend it with the family.  Then Bud admitted he'd scheduled a date, and his mother said he should go on the date, that he has his own life to live, etc. etc.  And this was her birthday, not some generic manufactured day of honor. 

Good thing they have Julia working the farm so hard, and she doesn't have time to sit around watching old TV shows.

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On 1/9/2021 at 9:56 AM, Lily247 said:

If religion was a deal breaker for Natalie, she should have broken it off with him. He doesn't care what religion she ascribes to it what her eating habits are because he is on the liberal side of these things. You can't force someone to take on your religion just because you want them to, or not to enjoy their meat if that is their lifestyle. Natalie needs to break it off instead of trying to make a square peg fit into a round hole. They are completely different people, she is pretentious and wants a healthy eating/citylife/church lifestyle and he is fundamentally not any of those things. I think he is a nice, calm guy, an average Joe, who would be better suited to a low maintenance women from Washington, and Natalie needs to take several chill pills. 

She is in it because she is nearing 40 and wants to have kids, and in Ukraine she'd have  no shot. 

100%.

Did we all notice how fakey, fake she was smiling and cooking for him, and telling him how smart he was for solving her unpacking issue, telling him how happy she was he was trying to eat healthier and trying to lose weight and she says she needs to gain weight, trying to be the perfect housewife, etc...she was really laying it on thick and he was wiping off her kiss.  He better watch out or she will boil his cat all the while smiling and humming like a 1950's housewife.

I think her mother was fed questions to ask when they were face timing, asking if she was wearing the engagement ring, all Natalie had to say was no because she was cleaning but no she needed to cry but put on a brave front while assuring her mother that Mike was a romantic fiance who spoils her rotten. 

Something is just not right with that girl, forcing this relationship just for a baby or possibility of a baby will only blow up in her face.

On 1/9/2021 at 12:05 AM, magemaud said:

Also, I thought Yara’s pink eyeshadow looked awful until I saw Tiffany’s 

Did Marilyn Manson do her make up? Really bad, she did not even put on mascara, just a foundation that made her look dead.

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@

On 1/5/2021 at 9:39 AM, Chickabiddy said:

I’m not really sure how much time you have spent in New Orleans - I don’t know anyone who actually uses the term Nawlins, but I only lived there for 15 years.😉

New Orleans offers so much more than the Jazz and crawfish stereotype. 🙄

They have wonderful art museums,  several historical museums in the FQ, an  aquarium, an Insectarium, the Audubon Zoo, WW2 museum, walking historical tours, architectural tours, voodoo tours,  and historical riverboat rides up and down the Mississippi. My fave goes to Chalmette Battlefield.

There is also a lot of great, local retail and day spas on Magazine St. 

Let’s not forget Audubon Park, City Park, The Joy Theatre, The Saegner Theatre, Mahalia Jackson Theatre. Le Petit Theatre du Vieux Carre. And then all of he music venues on Frenchman Street. All of the places offer live performances beyond  the “street/jazz scene.”  Tulane and Loyola both offer numerous theatre, music and cultural events. And if their undergrad students can walk around the city quite safely, I think street smart Yara from Ukraine can handle New Orleans on her own. Lived in the French Quarter and Uptown and used my bike and the streetcar almost exclusively. Never had a problem. It’s a tourist city with friendly, outgoing people, excellent restaurants and even better Happy Hours. Used to be able to sneak out of work early, hop a streetcar and meet the girls for 50 cent oysters and 2 for 1 frozen French 75s at the corner of Napoleon and St. Charles by 5:15.
 

And if that’s not enough, Yara can easily arrange for pick up at a local hotel to go on s swamp tour, visit historic homes on River Road or go to Avery island to tour the Tabasco Factory and bird sanctuary. AND they even have indoor plumbing and AC  in NOLA, too. 

Yeah, I should be working for the New Orleans Convention and Tourism Board. But I get my back up when my favorite city is viewed in one dimension as having no more to offer than a street scene with Huge Ass Beers. Course I sort of blame Jovi for taking Yara to Bourbon Street. Locals don’t go there unless under duress, and they certainly don’t take friends there, which actually may say a lot about how Jovi really feels about Yara.

Thanks for coming to my NOLA TED Talk. 😘

 

 

Edited by String Theory
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