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S02.E21: The Cost Of Love


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On 11/24/2020 at 12:17 PM, itsadryheat said:

Anyone buying Brittany's crying on the rock with Yazan's brother?

I am buying the fact that the tears are for all the followers she could lose and the dumpster fire of her mentions on all social platforms if her actions DID result in Yazan's murder.  But no tears were there for Yazan.  

On 11/24/2020 at 5:57 PM, PamelaMaeSnap said:

Thank you. I have serious memory issues (medical) and the most significant is my lack of ability to determine past time passage (did something happen a month/a year/10 years ago e.g.) but when she said that even I thought “wait a minute, there’s no way I’ve been watching this shitshow for 8 YEARS!!!! Did I mishear that or am I misremembering?” It never even occurred to me that this could be show manipulation!

Girl, you know 2020 HAS been 8 years long.  I feel you on this. 

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The Jenny and Sumit story picked up with their first season of TOW last season, this is season two for them, and hopefully the last season.      The rest of their storyline is on the Couples thread for J & S.

Edited by CrazyInAlabama
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On 11/24/2020 at 3:25 PM, configdotsys said:

Allowing does not enter the picture when your "child" is approaching 30.

I thought that was in extremely poor taste. Almost like an F-you type thing. I don't care if people there did not know what it meant. Ari did and it was a bitchy thing to do.

This was HUGE to me. That is simply not done there. Ever. I was truly shocked at that and began thinking that this may be some sort of con. 

RE: first bolded point - I don't think it's in poor taste at all. She is Jewish and she is being forced by Bini to baptize the baby in the Orthodox Christian faith. She's allowing it to happen because she feels she has no choice, but she also doesn't believe in it so I think she figures she's going to leave him anyway and raise the baby by herself so she's throwing him a bone to shut him and his harpy sisters up. If I was, her, I'd wear my Star of David too. Fuck them. If they want to force my baby to be baptized in their church then I want to remind them that his mother is Jewish and actually, in the Jewish faith, if one is adhering strictly to old fashioned protocol, if the mother is Jewish, the baby is Jewish. Period. End of story. She should have told Bini that! Go ahead and baptize him but he's always going to be Jewish.

Can you tell I'm pissed off that he and his sisters forced her to do that...?!

As for Jordan, YES I totally agree with you! When I saw him get up to walk towards her I immediately stiffened up and thought, NO, this is a set up because this would not happen there if this was all legit. It's bullshit. Even his parents, I think they're in on it too for the sweet TLC bakshish.

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8 minutes ago, gingerella said:

RE: first bolded point - I don't think it's in poor taste at all. She is Jewish and she is being forced by Bini to baptize the baby in the Orthodox Christian faith. She's allowing it to happen because she feels she has no choice, but she also doesn't believe in it so I think she figures she's going to leave him anyway and raise the baby by herself so she's throwing him a bone to shut him and his harpy sisters up. If I was, her, I'd wear my Star of David too. Fuck them. If they want to force my baby to be baptized in their church then I want to remind them that his mother is Jewish and actually, in the Jewish faith, if one is adhering strictly to old fashioned protocol, if the mother is Jewish, the baby is Jewish. Period. End of story. She should have told Bini that! Go ahead and baptize him but he's always going to be Jewish.

If I went to a Synagogue and wore a big old crucifix with Christ on it; I think that might count as bad fucking taste.

I don't think Bini's sisters are harpies at all, but I do think Ari's parents have sticks up their asses and are low key racists, they looked TOO happy when they saw how fair the baby was (probably glad that if they have to raise him in NJ, he can at least pass for....something other than Black.)

Didn't they say Ari's mother converted to Judaism? 

 

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1 hour ago, Neurochick said:

If I went to a Synagogue and wore a big old crucifix with Christ on it; I think that might count as bad fucking taste.

I don't think Bini's sisters are harpies at all, but I do think Ari's parents have sticks up their asses and are low key racists, they looked TOO happy when they saw how fair the baby was (probably glad that if they have to raise him in NJ, he can at least pass for....something other than Black.)

Didn't they say Ari's mother converted to Judaism? 

 

No, if you go to a synagogue and you are not Jewish, you are a visitor and it is not, IMO, in bad taste at all if you are wearing a cross. 

And i do think Bini’s sisters are harpies, not just forcing the baptism but with their talk of hell.

I am also finding some of the discussion here in this vein distasteful. I will leave it there.

 

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16 hours ago, judylo said:

No, if you go to a synagogue and you are not Jewish, you are a visitor and it is not, IMO, in bad taste at all if you are wearing a cross. 

And i do think Bini’s sisters are harpies, not just forcing the baptism but with their talk of hell.

I am also finding some of the discussion here in this vein distasteful. I will leave it there.

 

Totally agree with you on this. A synagogue welcones all faiths as guests and it would be entirely appropriate to wear a cross or any other symbol of one's faith there.

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Distasteful is an elegant way to say it, and yes  she was very much ok wearing what she did, and regarding her parents there’s a lot of ugly accusations and assumptions thrown at them around these parts which is unwarranted and unnecessary,  almost ‘projected’ even, might I suggest.

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I don't think Bini and fam are wrong in demanding a baptism. Why should the child automatically be Jewish just because that's what Ari is? Religion is clearly important to both of them, so one shouldn't be able to dictate everything. The sensible thing to do would be for the child to be exposed to the traditions of both faiths, so when they're older, they can decide for themselves which, if either, religion they want to follow.

Ari's parents showed their true colours when they so harshly criticised the apartment in the extra scene, while Bini heard everything. They weren't just being critical, they were downright rude. If I was Bini, I would have schooled them on a) what life is like in Ethiopia and b) how it's rude to criticise someone else's home just because they're poorer than you. The apartment has everything necessary, isn't dirty or disgusting, so imho Ari's parents crossed the line. They are so entitled and have absolutely no understanding of life beyond their own narrow experiences. 

Edited by Takitaki
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On 11/25/2020 at 9:30 PM, gingerella said:

If they want to force my baby to be baptized in their church then I want to remind them that his mother is Jewish and actually, in the Jewish faith, if one is adhering strictly to old fashioned protocol, if the mother is Jewish, the baby is Jewish. Period. End of story. She should have told Bini that! Go ahead and baptize him but he's always going to be Jewish.

Yes, just go thru the motions, let the family enjoy the pageantry, etc...but my question is when there is a ceremony that will be a new experience for someone why don't the people in the know share the information about what to expect during that ceremony?  Maybe a heads up about some holy man smashing a bible in your face or the fact you would not be able to see what was happening, etc...Why wouldn't Ari ask a million questions about the baptism from start to finish?  

In this day and age of enlightenment about all cultures and religions I am surprised that our free thinking Ari decided to draw the line baptism, after all she is a world traveller, immersing herself in all cultures she chose to raw dog a local and THIS is what she says "no" to?  I would have said no to that awful haircut Bini gave the baby, lol.

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On 11/25/2020 at 9:44 PM, Neurochick said:

I do think Ari's parents have sticks up their asses and are low key racists, they looked TOO happy when they saw how fair the baby was (probably glad that if they have to raise him in NJ, he can at least pass for....something other than Black.)

I'm not sure how you are inferring this. To mention that they were "relieved" or "glad" regarding the baby's skin tone is conjecture: they were seeing the baby for the first time and had emotion on their faces: joy? relief that he is healthy? a release of tension after a long flight? How could we possibly know unless one of them said, "thank god your skin is light"?   

I think Ari's parents are exhausted by her. Mom doesn't want to let go and has been her safety net for so long. Judging by their age and bits and pieces of what I have read, my impression is that Dad met Mom (a nurse) on the job when they were married to other people; Ari is their later-in-life mutual child and they are both just too tired to cope with so they humor her and give her money because otherwise, she has learned, she will complain and whine until she gets her way. Mom looks well into her 60s and I wouldn't be surprised if Dad is in his 70s. He looks over all of it.  Mom's comment at the airport: "If you get that feeling like you are not happy, let Daddy and me know and we will help you." Parents are not there to take away your pain, bail you out of difficult times or help you avoid difficult situations.

Regarding Sumit's parents: I think it is hard for Americans to understand, and many are saying "he's a grown adult; he needs to just man up and marry Jenny and his parents need to let him do what he wants." But culture isn't easily rebuffed, and despite the fact that I think Sumit is an immature man-boy who can't seem to figure out responsible adult life, he won't easily do his own thing and say heck with Mom and Dad when it is so ingrained in him that parental approval is huge. Sure, we can all say that his parents don't have a right to feel ashamed and embarrassed at his marrying someone older than them, but cultural norms run very deep. India is much more intergenerational than the US is; he traditionally would be expected to care for his parents in their old age, raise grandchildren to carry on the family line, etc. Won't happen with Jenny. I'm not sure I understand their willingness to bankroll his divorce, however; from what I understand a marriage (esp an arranged one) is more of a business arrangement than a loving partnership, and I'm surprised they didn't tell him he had to tough out his marriage.

I don't doubt that Brittany's tears were authentic on the mountaintop, but I think they were more for herself than Yazan. ("Shit, I look like an idiot chasing after this guy who might get himself killed on my watch," "damn, this could impact my number of followers on Instagram.")

Edited by KateHearts
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4 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Yes, just go thru the motions, let the family enjoy the pageantry, etc...but my question is when there is a ceremony that will be a new experience for someone why don't the people in the know share the information about what to expect during that ceremony?  Maybe a heads up about some holy man smashing a bible in your face or the fact you would not be able to see what was happening, etc...Why wouldn't Ari ask a million questions about the baptism from start to finish?  

In this day and age of enlightenment about all cultures and religions I am surprised that our free thinking Ari decided to draw the line baptism, after all she is a world traveller, immersing herself in all cultures she chose to raw dog a local and THIS is what she says "no" to?  I would have said no to that awful haircut Bini gave the baby, lol.

Bolding mine: What was THAT? Did Bini do that to his hair? I must have missed that part...but WHY?

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Jenny and Sumit: I don’t think the parents will ever accept the marriage. But, as this season has gone on, I’m starting to wonder if Sumit even wants the marriage anymore. I’m guessing the more time he’s spent with her the more annoyed he’s gotten and he realizes there’s no way he’s willing to give up his parents for someone he isn’t sure he wants to spend the rest of he’s life with. That meeting with his brother said it all - he was speaking so little, being vague, so Jenny jumps in with the “we love each other.” I’m not sure that love is still there for Sumit. 

 

Brittany and Yazan: Sorry to say, but Brittany doesn’t really love Yazan. She truly LOVES the lime light, she LOVES the attention , she doesn’t have any respect or care for anyone else. There you go I said it, she is a selfish twat and a clout chaser.

Also, can we give credits to the amazing interpreter Adam for translating so eloquently? He is so far the best translator we’ve ever had on 90 Day Fiance. I think Jihoon could use a translator like him.

 

Ari and Biniyam: It’s sad that Bini was expecting her to freak out. She’s sure that he can’t trust her not to, so there’s no trust between them. I don’t believe they even love each other but are together because she got knocked up and now they both love that precious baby. It won’t last. She needs to go back home.

 

Cheesedick Tim & Melyza: If I were Tim, I would’ve just said "Hey, I'm going to get milk" and then left on a plane. 🤣 In fact, he never should have gone there in the first place.

These two are so freaking strange. They are not for each other. They will never trust each other. They are beating a dead horse!

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3 hours ago, TipseyGirl said:

Bolding mine: What was THAT? Did Bini do that to his hair? I must have missed that part...but WHY?

 It is a traditional hair cut babies get before they are baptised, Bini did it himself.   See what I mean by not asking questions prior to an event, if only there was a way to find out information about different cultures, sigh.

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I have to say, Melyza's mother is the most miserable bitchy mother that's been on this show.  Ever.  Someone has obviously pissed in her corn flakes every damn day!  Any why on earth are Tim and Melyza clinging onto this messed up relationship like they're both in their 90's and can't move on?  That just blows my mind.  It's not like they're trying to save a 20 year marriage.  They what, hooked up in the states for a while, and now are fighting for this "relationship" that's based on nothing but lies and infidelity?  I don't get it...

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4 minutes ago, Chloe Dog said:

I have to say, Melyza's mother is the most miserable bitchy mother that's been on this show.  Ever.  Someone has obviously pissed in her corn flakes every damn day!  Any why on earth are Tim and Melyza clinging onto this messed up relationship like they're both in their 90's and can't move on?  That just blows my mind.  It's not like they're trying to save a 20 year marriage.  They what, hooked up in the states for a while, and now are fighting for this "relationship" that's based on nothing but lies and infidelity?  I don't get it...

...and “fame” and a reality show paycheque and whatever other monetization they can manage.  

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If Ari was a pious Jew, a conversation about not wanting to circumcise "her" baby because it should be his choice, simply would not exist within her. It would not have happened. Having a discussion about not doing it because it would be painful would not exist in a Jewish person's world. Even Reform Jews, who have had no problem tossing outdated rituals, adhere to the requirement that a baby be circumcised. That is one thing that is simply not negotiable or up for discussion of any kind.

To me, Ari uses her "Jewishness" when it suits her and expects accommodation as if she is the superior parent. Bini's religiousness is devout and genuine. Ari's seems manufactured and sits idle until she needs it. Bini's sisters grew up with heavy religion and expect that their brother's child will continue in that tradition. They do not seem to accept that Ari was not raised in their culture and that has to be taken into consideration. As narrow minded as they are about all this, Ari is a mirror image of them just coming from the other side. Ari thinks that it is her baby and she calls all the shots and no one else gets a say. She treats Bini and his family's wishes like irritants as if how dare he want to do xyz with MY baby.

 

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21 hours ago, Armchair Critic said:

Nasty. I am not even 54 yet and I cannot fathom "falling in love" with a 21 year old. She is an idiot.

I am 55, my sons are 23 and 21, so....yeah.....nope.  No way.

1 hour ago, DEL901 said:

...and “fame” and a reality show paycheque and whatever other monetization they can manage.  

Per Meliza and Cheesy: the show is called 90 Day Fiance yet they are not engaged with no plans to be engaged or married.

Edited by Mrs. Hanson
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Did anyone notice when the interpreter said that Yazan could be killed, Brittany almost laughed....she quickly looked down and covered her face.  Then she was able to push some tears out.  Why does Yazan’s brother support his brother marrying a woman who he can’t get along with?  What good is loving someone, if they make your life a living hell?  That’s messed up in any culture.  
 

 

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I don’t have much to add to the snarkversation. These couples have been a total snooze fest.

Love love love Father and Mother Sumit!  Jenny can’t understand a word they’re saying but Mother Sumit manages to get her point across quite adequately with angry gestures, the universal language of pissed off mothers-in.law.  

I’m completely shocked that Deavon’s dress is tasteful and appropriate. That’s a rarity in 90 Day land. They haven’t been showing much of Dracuzilla. I guess she’s managed to behave lately. 

I find Areola and her parents insufferable. That said, I think she was respectful of the Baptism ceremony.  I was raised Catholic but dropped any pretense of believing in any of it at a fairly young age. My ex was Jewish. We had no plan to raise our kids in either religion. My mother was upset that we didn’t baptize the kids so she baptized them in her kitchen sink. She did ask first and we told her to go right ahead if it would make her happy. I’m sure if we had said no, she would have done it anyway. 
 

Edited by nytonc
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12 hours ago, Chloe Dog said:

I have to say, Melyza's mother is the most miserable bitchy mother that's been on this show.  Ever.  Someone has obviously pissed in her corn flakes every damn day!  Any why on earth are Tim and Melyza clinging onto this messed up relationship like they're both in their 90's and can't move on?  That just blows my mind.  It's not like they're trying to save a 20 year marriage.  They what, hooked up in the states for a while, and now are fighting for this "relationship" that's based on nothing but lies and infidelity?  I don't get it...

They kept saying the same things over and over. In brief: "I don't want to go;" "I worry you will cheat on me;" "I don't know if I can trust you;" and at least four times: "This sucks."  Please put us all out of the misery that is watching you two joyless people and break it off.

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Most of the parents on this season are annoying but when I put myself in their places, they don’t seem so bad!  I would be beside myself with heartache and pain if one of my adult children were in a situation like those on this show.  Luckily, my kids have too much common sense and have made better life choices (just my opinion). 

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On 11/24/2020 at 5:12 PM, configdotsys said:

No crying Kenny this week... 

 

Thank God! I truly find this couple as dull as Cheesestick and Mayyyyyyyleeezza.  And that's kind of weird because I also find Armando the most likeable "character" that's ever been on.  Their whole plot line is just so stupid!  Hi!  My name is crying Kenny and I am here to whine about the fact that Mexico isn't exactly like the USA.   Over and over and over and over again.  He supposedly doesn't know the language, and he doesn't like the food.  He can't handle the hygiene issues or the poverty.  He doesn't agree with the culture or laws of an extremely Catholic country.  I mean, all of these Americans do this somewhat, but crying Kenny is just ridiculous.  

Dude, go back home.  Take Armando and Hannah if they can come.  But just stay off of my TV.

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23 hours ago, configdotsys said:

To me, Ari uses her "Jewishness" when it suits her and expects accommodation as if she is the superior parent. Bini's religiousness is devout and genuine. Ari's seems manufactured and sits idle until she needs it. Bini's sisters grew up with heavy religion and expect that their brother's child will continue in that tradition. They do not seem to accept that Ari was not raised in their culture and that has to be taken into consideration. As narrow minded as they are about all this, Ari is a mirror image of them just coming from the other side. Ari thinks that it is her baby and she calls all the shots and no one else gets a say. She treats Bini and his family's wishes like irritants as if how dare he want to do xyz with MY baby.

I have to say I am totally 110% on this. I admit I have not watched this season/relationship with the complete devotion to every detail that maybe I should have, but that said I've definitely gotten the vibe from Ari that she's "Jew'ish'" ... it's, at most, her ethnicity and culture but not really her religion in terms of her being devout ... and I say this as a "nice Jewish girl" (LOLOL) who considers Judaism my ethnicity for lack of a better word but that's pretty much it. I straddle the border of agnostic/atheist. I was never bat mitzvah, was a Sunday School dropout after 4th grade, and all the prayers and songs I knew I learned during two periods: 7th/8th grade when I attended about 15 bar mitzvahs for the boys in my class and 2003 when Little Snappy was bat mitzvah (by her choice) along with all the members of HER religious school class (and now, almost 20 years later, she is completely agnostic and married to a wonderful nice-not-Jewish-boy and I'm pretty sure my grandchild when they come along will be raised agnostic as well). 

The difference is, I don't ever pull out the "Jewish card" like Ari does. Bini IS devout and he IS genuine. I respect that completely. IMHO Avi is at this point a baby who should be raised with love and affection and be exposed and taught about ALL of his different bloodlines (I personally was, I admit, shocked to find out Ari's mom was NOT Jewish ... but whatever she "is," that's also part of Avi ... and the more lines of heritage and bloodlines the merrier ... 

My unpopular opinion is that baptism or not, circumcision or not, even down the line Bar Mitzvah or not ... eventually Avi will learn all of his history and hopefully be able to warp and weft them together into a unique thread that allows him to combine everything that made him into a new material (sorry for the awful analogy) ...

PS Where does the nickname "Cheesestick/Cheesedick" come from???

PPS I am CONVINCED I have seen Deavan's (GORGEOUS) wedding dress elsewhere on reality TV ... MAFS maybe? Anyone? 

 

 

Edited by PamelaMaeSnap
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On 11/27/2020 at 3:35 PM, Baltimore Betty said:

 It is a traditional hair cut babies get before they are baptised, Bini did it himself.   See what I mean by not asking questions prior to an event, if only there was a way to find out information about different cultures, sigh.

Honestly *sigh* you don’t even have to ask these days you can look it up online most of the time.

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On 11/27/2020 at 10:14 AM, Baltimore Betty said:

Yes, just go thru the motions, let the family enjoy the pageantry, etc...but my question is when there is a ceremony that will be a new experience for someone why don't the people in the know share the information about what to expect during that ceremony?  Maybe a heads up about some holy man smashing a bible in your face or the fact you would not be able to see what was happening, etc...Why wouldn't Ari ask a million questions about the baptism from start to finish?  

In this day and age of enlightenment about all cultures and religions I am surprised that our free thinking Ari decided to draw the line baptism, after all she is a world traveller, immersing herself in all cultures she chose to raw dog a local and THIS is what she says "no" to?  I would have said no to that awful haircut Bini gave the baby, lol.

Ari mentioned that her father is Jewish. Whether her mother converted or not, it would not be counted by Orthodox Judaism, for a variety of reasons, so by true Orthodox Judaism, Ari is not Jewish, and no, simply identifying as Jewish doesn't actually make you one. Reform Judaism is more lenient but is a very watered down version, and a Reform convert would not be considered Jewish in Israel without undergoing an additional Orthodox conversion which takes approximately 3-5 years. Anyways. To walk into an Orthodox Jewish synagogue with a crucifix (if you are of the Christian faith or not) is indeed in very bad taste. Perhaps a Reform synagogue is more open.

It's interesting that Ari is so hell bent on identifying as Jewish, even gave her son a very Jewish, Hebrew name, however she picks and chooses her beliefs ( not believing that there is hell, for example, of which does exist in the Jewish religion. Also, her not wanting to circumsize her son, which is a core, CORE Jewish practice).

 

Also, had I been her, and as a Jewish person who practices, I would have held my ground about baptism and not have done it, would not have even entertained the thought of it, HAD I somehow procreated with someone who was such a religious Christian) l, would sacrifice the relationship for this for sure. But, that is why my husband and I belong to the same religion (crazy!). 

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5 hours ago, Lily247 said:

, that is why my husband and I belong to the same religion (crazy!). 

I agree 100% about if your religion and culture is THAT important to you then why even trifle with anyone who does not follow your religion or culture because at some point you or your mate will decide that baptism or what ever is suddenly the most important thing or your family needs you to raise the baby in their religion, etc...

7 hours ago, endure said:

Honestly *sigh* you don’t even have to ask these days you can look it up online most of the time.

Yes, that was my point.  

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On 11/25/2020 at 10:40 PM, judylo said:

No, if you go to a synagogue and you are not Jewish, you are a visitor and it is not, IMO, in bad taste at all if you are wearing a cross. 

And i do think Bini’s sisters are harpies, not just forcing the baptism but with their talk of hell.

I am also finding some of the discussion here in this vein distasteful. I will leave it there.

 

 I agree with a lot you have to say.

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2 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

I agree 100% about if your religion and culture is THAT important to you then why even trifle with anyone who does not follow your religion or culture because at some point you or your mate will decide that baptism or what ever is suddenly the most important thing or your family needs you to raise the baby in their religion, etc...

May I address an elephant in the room? 

Neither Jewish nor Christian faiths encourage sex outside of marriage, either pre-marital or extra-marital.  Why are BOTH Ari and Bini now insisting that the tenets of "their" faith be followed regarding religious practices on their child?  Had they cared about their faith so much a year ago, the child would not have been conceived.  Indeed, they could have spent those evenings discussing things like cultural and religious differences instead of creating yet another complicating issue to address.

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On 11/27/2020 at 3:10 AM, Takitaki said:

Ari's parents showed their true colours when they so harshly criticised the apartment in the extra scene, while Bini heard everything. They weren't just being critical, they were downright rude. If I was Bini, I would have schooled them on a) what life is like in Ethiopia and b) how it's rude to criticise someone else's home just because they're poorer than you. The apartment has everything necessary, isn't dirty or disgusting, so imho Ari's parents crossed the line. They are so entitled and have absolutely no understanding of life beyond their own narrow experiences. 

My heart broke a little for Bini when I saw the Bonus scene because he had just proudly proclaimed in his TH that the apartment was the “nicest” and “most luxurious” place he had ever lived. Ari’s parents went on to diss the whole place RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM and said it wasn’t up to the standards their daughter and grandson should live in. 

I’ll bet snooty Dr Weinberg didn’t appreciate the toilet seat Bini installed in his honor 

Edited by magemaud
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On 11/24/2020 at 4:12 PM, configdotsys said:

 

No crying Kenny this week... 

I see that @Opine has already talked about Crying Kenny and his broken record complaints, and I totally agree.

The Crybaby label applies to Cheesedick too. Mr. Vintage thinks Melysa is cute and protests when I want to ff their scenes, so we've had to compromise. I'm allowed to ff as soon as Cheeseydick starts with the teary-eyes and crying. 

Also, Jenny crying and wailing about her unrequited ring ceremony and parental in-law acceptance has got to be some bad acting. Doesn't she realize how unbecoming this mental frailty is to Sumit, and how she's actually making him question if he wants to be 100% responsible for her happiness? He's weak-minded enough for both of them, and probably assumed she would be a strong partner in a hard life. The same for Armando; Kenny breaking down has got to be getting old. And why is he allowing this behavior in front of his young daughter? 

I suppose it's not politically correct to be disgusted with these grown people crying over life's many curveballs. Maybe they're all just acting and hoping for some sort of soap opera follow up, idk.

In 38 years I've seen my man cry a few times and haven't judged him harshly, I'm not completely unsympathetic in real life. 

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Brittany and Jenny BOTH need to understand that "he's a grown ass man, he should make his own decisions" is a subjective, relative cultural norm, not a natural law. That's not any kind of desirable value in India or in Jordan. B's and J's behavior is just American ethnocentrism and cultural imperialism writ tiny, and they don't even see it. To them, their cultural beliefs are universal truths. It's exhausting.

I mean, I believe the same things they do. I think our way is better. That's why I married a Westerner who shares my beliefs and we live in the West. They should give it a try.

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22 hours ago, PamelaMaeSnap said:

Where does the nickname "Cheesestick/Cheesedick" come from???

Cheesestick...I mean Tim himself, explained in the first episode that was his nickname growing up. People here came up with variations like Cheese Dick. 

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On 11/25/2020 at 11:40 PM, judylo said:

No, if you go to a synagogue and you are not Jewish, you are a visitor and it is not, IMO, in bad taste at all if you are wearing a cross. 

And i do think Bini’s sisters are harpies, not just forcing the baptism but with their talk of hell.

I am also finding some of the discussion here in this vein distasteful. I will leave it there.

 

I find everyone in the Biniyam/Ari story incredibly annoying. His sisters are absolutely harpies. Her parents are Jersey level bougie. Ari is that child from the good, well to do, professionals family who goes off the rails. Many of us know one of those. Her mother seems like a nice regular lady but definitely is wondering how her daughter came out the way she did, instead of going to university, getting a master's degree, and beginning a yuppie lifestyle, rather than. Tattooing her feelings to her forearms and.getting knocked up across the world. 

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On 11/27/2020 at 11:33 AM, KateHearts said:

I'm not sure I understand their willingness to bankroll his divorce, however; from what I understand a marriage (esp an arranged one) is more of a business arrangement than a loving partnership, and I'm surprised they didn't tell him he had to tough out his marriage.

Summit violated the terms of the marriage contract (legally and culturally) by leaving his wife and taking up with Jenny (on film, for everyone to see). HIs wife had every right (legally and culturally) to demand a divorce, leave and get her dowry back, what Summit did was shameful (in his parents eyes) but a tiny tiny way to save face was to make it right with the wife/her family, and give her the dowry back so she could move on with her life. They could not drag Summit back (although they tried) if his wife wouldnt have him (and can you blame her??). 

So they were not going to embarrass themselves further by not paying the dowry back.

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Just commenting re Ari Bini. I actually appreciated Ari's mom saying that a baptism is not just bathing in water, that it has meaning.

Although she, Ari considers herself Jewish (and wears that big honking Star of David), she picks and chooses and that seems to be her family's way. Baby ( the newborn one) did not have  a bris/brit which is such a fundamental part of the religion- the covenant. In my opinion, that was one of the more telling parts regarding her religious beliefs.

 

My last comment is that if a Christian wears a cross into a synagogue, there is no issue there and it is totally appropriate.

If the custom is to not have bare shoulders and one wears bare shoulders, then THAT is not in good taste but wearing a sign of one's religion is totally fine.

(done with my preaching and I can show myself out now).

 

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On 11/27/2020 at 2:57 PM, Hotel Snarker said:

Cheesedick Tim & Melyza: If I were Tim, I would’ve just said "Hey, I'm going to get milk" and then left on a plane. 🤣 In fact, he never should have gone there in the first place.

These two are so freaking strange. They are not for each other. They will never trust each other. They are beating a dead horse!

The weirdest thing to me was, they had no end game.  He can't stay forever in Columbia without a job, and she was CLEARLY not committed, much less in love with him.  She could barely tolerate looking at him.  What a waste of time for both of them.

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