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S08.E01: Wedding Bells are Ringing


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On 11/7/2020 at 4:36 PM, mamadrama said:

This is kind of hard to watch. Chase and Ryan look like they can barely stand to be in the room with the rest of them. 

I agree that the engagement and everything was fake, but I think Whitney really did have a crush on Chase-in the same way that she seems to love every guy who gives her attention, even the ones who are paid. I wonder if she was just hoping that he'd fake it til he felt it. 

I've wondered this myself.  Even those of us who pay the least attention to what's going on (looking at you, me) knew this love story was not only phony but just stupid as all fuck, and Whitney believes this guy is in love with her?  I mean, think about this as if it were really happening.  You've got this super-morbidly obese *baby* who doesn't do anything in her life, interesting or not interesting, who has zero charm and/or wit, is horribly inappropriate in what she considers sexy behavior, this woman who is an embarrassment to anyone she shares airspace with--and not because she's so fat, although I mentioned that first because, well, it's what you notice first before she opens her mouth, but because there's nothing there--has lived her entire life depending on her parents' love and support practically to breathe, and she's going to attract, first, a hyper-masculine type like Ryan who wants to go into business with her in an *exercise* business.  Oh shit I've choked on my Grape-Nuts.  And then that her sweet mountain boy <snort> falls for her HARD in just a few weeks and wants to marry her.  Sweet baby Jesus on a pogo stick.  NONE of this was anywhere near the realm of possibility, but I think you have a point:  I too wonder if as time went on and Lil Abner was coached to show her tenderness, she was believing in it all.  I don't know that she's self-aware enough to have reached the fake it till you make it explanation of his ardor, but I think she might be delusional enough to have believed in their everlasting love, and the sudden intrusion of reality was a real gut-punch to her.

I can't wait to see her friends treat her with kid gloves over this "breakup" of a romance that never was.  I wonder if any of them believed in it.  You know sarcastic Todd and Tal rolled their eyes from the beginning but figured whatever kept the show paychecks rolling in they were on board with.

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On 11/8/2020 at 2:11 PM, Brooklynista said:

When Whitney is arguing with Buddy and says "do you want to be done with THIS", did anyone get the vibe she was threatening Buddy? To me it felt like comply or the TLC gravy train ends for you. She is such an incredibly shitty friend. The TLC check is how she keeps her minions in line and getting in her pissy hot tub water.

Watching this season is going to be delicious seeing her karma boomerang in her face.

Yes, I did. I took it as a threat that if he didn't do what she said he would be done being on "her" show. She is a shitty friend.  She also needs to quit this " I can do anything they do" as in jumping the creek- that would be like trying to get the Hindenburg to fly without gas. Too bad she didn't wind up with a real stick up her ass climbing over the log. She must not see how ridiculous and stupid she looked. The rental looked lovely, but Chase and Ryan looked like they would have rather gone to Walmart on Black Friday then do deal with this gaggle of clowns

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Ugh, looks like Whit and Bud are back to being besties again. Pics and all on her IG. Her minions are telling her she and Buddy should get married, they belong together, they are perfect for each other and he is such a great guy. It's vomit worthy to say the least. 

Yeah, he's a great guy. Screwed over her best friend, can't hold a job, doesn't have a nickel to his name and he's pushing 40. Go ahead, Whit, marry that man!!

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10 hours ago, John M said:

I honestly do not believe Buddy ever had a powdered cocaine addiction. As someone that works in social services and in a previous, much more glamorous life, snorted a LOT of cocaine as well as knowing a large number of people that did the same, it's statistically speaking a pretty rare addiction that requires a LOT more money to sustain that Buddy ever had.

As a gateway addiction? Sure, lots of people start off with snorting powdered cocaine and move into injecting coke or smoking crack, or often, doing meth, it certainly fuels alcohol addiction, all sorts of life problems, but an actual addiction to snorting cocaine? Yeah, I don't believe it for a second. I absolutely believe Buddy was a hardcore alcoholic and probably snorted cocaine on occasion, but the way he says it, it's like almost wanting to brag as it is largely seen as a kind of glamorous and expensive form of the drug more associated with high functioning people and not fat barely employed deadbeat alcoholics. Snorting cocaine is just, a stupidly poor/expensive delivery mechanism if you are trying to be high on cocaine and not just using it socially in amounts that allow you to party, which is what Buddy keeps suggesting he was doing, and, again, very rare for people that are actually strongly addicted to cocaine.

Agreed. Buddy abused alcohol and possibly prescription meds like benzos. He was far too lethargic to be a cokehead.  He talks about using ‘blow’ to give him cool street cred.  

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While I tire of Whitney's desperate pleas for attention (who really wants to be seen on TV trying to cross a creek after your friends do it and demanding the help of multiple people due to your size -- have some personal pride, y'all), I do really like that there is no other group on TV like Whitney's friend group. They're 100 percent real, and it's refreshing to see people like that on a reality TV show. I live in the South, too, and I would totally be hanging out with her friend group versus Chase and Ryan. I like that they're authentic -- some are cuter than others but no one is Kardashian hot, some are overweight, etc. That's one reason why I keep watching this bullshit. I feel the same about her parents.

The two groupings of friends (Whitney's crew versus Ryan/Chase) seemed like they would never be friends in any other avenue of life, and that contributes to the awkwardness of seeing them all together at scenes like the breakfast table. 

 

Edited by GoGamecox
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1 hour ago, bichonblitz said:

Ugh, looks like Whit and Bud are back to being besties again. Pics and all on her IG. Her minions are telling her she and Buddy should get married, they belong together, they are perfect for each other and he is such a great guy. It's vomit worthy to say the least. 

Yeah, he's a great guy. Screwed over her best friend, can't hold a job, doesn't have a nickel to his name and he's pushing 40. Go ahead, Whit, marry that man!!

You forgot "repeatedly said that he's not romantically or physically interested in her"! 😄 

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2 hours ago, Mahamid Frauded Me said:

Yes, I did. I took it as a threat that if he didn't do what she said he would be done being on "her" show. She is a shitty friend.  She also needs to quit this " I can do anything they do" as in jumping the creek- that would be like trying to get the Hindenburg to fly without gas. Too bad she didn't wind up with a real stick up her ass climbing over the log. She must not see how ridiculous and stupid she looked. The rental looked lovely, but Chase and Ryan looked like they would have rather gone to Walmart on Black Friday then do deal with this gaggle of clowns

I was positively giddy with the thought of her getting multiple splinters on her ass and upper thighs.  

Hey, anybody need a ride on my handbasket to hell?  😄  

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23 hours ago, 3girlsforus said:

I wouldn’t want a beach wedding either, although I wouldn’t be opposed to an indoor wedding or a deck type wedding where you could see the ocean in the background either. But my issue with Whitney on this one was that she actually seemed mad that Chase expressed a desire for a beach wedding. She seemed upset that he didn’t just say ‘hey good idea’ about what she wanted. I realize all of this is moot since this was all fake but if it was real why wouldn’t it make sense that Chase would think a beach wedding would be a good idea since .... well he lives by the beach. Making everyone drive to the mountains isn’t everyone’s idea of a good thing. Just once I’d love to hear her say something like ‘well how about an indoor wedding at the beach’ or something like that. He ever mentions the air conditioning, fans, etc. She could suggest something not on the sand. But NEVER does that occur to her. She wants everyone to have to drive hours to the mountains, spend money to stay overnight, and freeze their asses off (including her wedding party) because she’s too fat to be somewhere above 50 degrees and won’t consider any options besides what she wants.

This is the same jerk that keeps the windows down and air conditioning on in the car for like a 10 hr drive to the point the 3 other passengers have to wear parkas and also be covered in blankets.  She’s such an asshole.

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On 11/10/2020 at 12:38 PM, 3girlsforus said:

I don’t think the minions see each other a lot outside of filming. They may have seen each other a bit more earlier in the show but I think for the most part they have their own lives and see each other occasionally, as would be typical of long term friends with different lives now. I think they continue with the show for the paycheck but also I think because they’ve been friends with Whitney for a long time and some loyalty comes with that, even when you know it’s not a great relationship. I also suspect that TLC has them under contract, either by season or by multiple season, where by if they bail without consent from TLC there could be ramifications. I think Buddy was genuinely pissed off but he can’t bail because TLC needs him for the ‘got dumped and now my best friend is living with me during the pandemic’ story line. And yes - he needs the money

I agree with this, though I think Todd has tired of her shit.  He seems to openly shade her, yet I did notice he has been getting a lot less screen time. What do Heather and Whit really have in common anymore?  I feel that the 'place card' thing was a set up by production. Buddy is a loser and will stick with Whit as long as he can for the $$$ and perhaps lead her on so he can have a free place to crash. I will never understand what Heather was doing with him, she seems fairly put together and has a good job.

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17 minutes ago, sainte-chapelle said:

I agree with this, though I think Todd has tired of her shit.  He seems to openly shade her, yet I did notice he has been getting a lot less screen time. What do Heather and Whit really have in common anymore?  I feel that the 'place card' thing was a set up by production. Buddy is a loser and will stick with Whit as long as he can for the $$$ and perhaps lead her on so he can have a free place to crash. I will never understand what Heather was doing with him, she seems fairly put together and has a good job.

I’ve wondered about Heather myself. At first I thought she had low self-esteem but then I thought it was maybe more Buddy was comfortable like an old raggedy pair of slippers.  She seems to be an introvert and the messes she encounters with online dating seem like a nightmare so maybe she just dated Buddy because he was there and she already knew him. Buddy is probably good with kids because he often acts like one.  I think Heather out of all of them probably spent the most time with Whitney so Buddy was probably always hanging around and despite my amazement Buddy doesn’t seem to have a problem with getting women.

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24 minutes ago, sainte-chapelle said:

It also irked me how Glen went on and on about 'tradition' and Chase not asking his permission. She is a grown woman who does not need your approval Glen.  She isn't a piece of property. 

I think this is just more production created “drama”. Even if Glenn does believe someone should ask their potential mate’s dad for his blessing, I think he’s way past carrying about that by now. I think if he thought for a second Chase was really going to marry Whitney he would be following Chase around like a puppy heaping thanks on him and trying to have the wedding as soon as possible so he wouldn’t bolt. I really hope Glenn and Babs knew it was a fake relationship, but even if they didn’t, they certainly seem to know that it wasn’t going to happen. Babs’s line about Whitney needed to let Chase have some kind of opinion was hilarious. She clearly knows that Whitney does not have a personality for marriage. 

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On 11/7/2020 at 3:09 PM, John M said:

Every moment of Chase with Whitney was just so cringeful, there is zero chemistry or affection on the part of Chase with Whitney. It's like he resents every moment he is forced to be around her. 

The look on his face with the cat carrier in the car 😂😂😂

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5 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

^^^ This here is perfection; something I couldn’t find a way to verbalize, but I co-sign it, also as a former dabbler in the, ahem, Colombian Whites.  In the world where I came up, there was a glamour, or a chicness, to powered cocaine and mutterings about whether people want to go somewhere to party, that didn’t exist on the same strata as people downing two dozen Bud Lites and taking bong hits at someone’s filthy apartment.  

For Buddy, it was probably much more of the latter, but he pretends it’s the former to...impress people?  Go figure.  I totally agree that if Buddy was getting high on hard drugs, it was likely meth, and then maybe crack, but those drugs don’t tell the same story as the high-functioning executive or flight attendant, or beautiful party-goers, those drugs make people conjure...Buddy.  It’s actually kind of funny if you think about the fact that the guy is in recovery for something he’s probably never had a problem with (though I do think he was an extremely heavy drinker), but I think everyone on this show (with the exception of Tal and Todd) is a liar, and even the non-liars will fake scenes, which doesn’t sit right with me, so it’s par for the course.

I thought AA was supposed to be a system where people were able to find recovery through a process of being brutally honest with themselves.  I also heard that in AA, they say it’s a disease of attitudes, you’re only as sick as your secrets, etc.  It’s not my ideology—it’s his ideology—but if Buddy is this loud, proud recovering addict, and he’s been clean and sober for years now, save for that one slip-up (if we buy the bill of goods he’s selling), Buddy should have progressed more.  He should be able to look people in the eye and convey a clear, concise thought by this point.  If a woman—even a woman as heinous as Whitney—tells him not to touch her, he should not have 20 questions about that.  He should know how having a “fiancé” is a game-changer, or at least pretend to for the show.  

(I know Whitney is a hypocritical, attention-seeking bitch, and Buddy had every right to tell Whit that she touches him as a counterpoint so that they could have a conversation where clear boundaries are drawn; that’s fine.  What sat right with me not at all was when Whitney told Buddy he couldn’t grab her and shove her onto his lap as part of a greeting, and that was met with a pause, a swipe of the beard, and then words of protest.  If she doesn’t like it and she’s engaged, keep her off your fucking lap, you creep.  If not for you, if not for her, if not for Chase, do it for the sake of the damned furniture). 

Very rarely is an alcoholic—especially one as young as Buddy—still so fucked up at this stage of the game to the point where he is always squirming, glancing around, mumbling through his beard, scratching himself under the collar and appearing generally uncomfortable, and so damned out of shape.  Buddy always looks like his next breath is going to be his last.  A lot of it probably just has to do with a vast over intake of greasy food and no direction in life, which is even less glamorous than hitting the whiskey too hard.  

I wish they’d scrap him, as he is too depressing to watch.  As much as a pill as she is, at least Whitney expresses some joie de vivre every now and again, whereas Buddy is in a perpetual state of looking like he wants someone to shoot him and put him out of his misery like Old Yeller.  

The law of social media desperation states that, if Buddy is gone, some slightly fitter, slightly less suicidal, slightly less self-loathing guy will come out of the woodwork to do Buddy’s job as best-friend-cum-crosser-of-the-fleshhold.  Ok, I’m about to go lose my breakfast.  

Someone I was close to was “working the steps” and we were in a session with his therapist when I expressed concern that I was not feeling confident that him getting sober and continuing to do the steps was going to end in him being a person I wanted to be around. I’ll never forget what the therapist said: “once he’s sober and doing everything he’s committed to do, you may discover that at his core he’s still an immature asshole.”

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4 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Ugh, looks like Whit and Bud are back to being besties again. Pics and all on her IG. Her minions are telling her she and Buddy should get married, they belong together, they are perfect for each other and he is such a great guy. It's vomit worthy to say the least. 

Yeah, he's a great guy. Screwed over her best friend, can't hold a job, doesn't have a nickel to his name and he's pushing 40. Go ahead, Whit, marry that man!!

I wonder if her flurry came from Buddy posting this

 

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Sooooo this episode was filmed in November, right? And Chase’s baby was born September 9? So he impregnated the mama in early December? If we pretend the engagement was real, it looks like the mountain getaway didn’t make him more committed to old Whitless. 😏

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4 minutes ago, AUJulia said:

Sooooo this episode was filmed in November, right? And Chase’s baby was born September 9? So he impregnated the mama in early December? If we pretend the engagement was real, it looks like the mountain getaway didn’t make him more committed to old Whitless. 😏

Well in his defense, he may not have been able to wedge himself in the urine-filled hot tub to form an official bond. 

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2 hours ago, 3girlsforus said:

I think this is just more production created “drama”. Even if Glenn does believe someone should ask their potential mate’s dad for his blessing, I think he’s way past carrying about that by now. I think if he thought for a second Chase was really going to marry Whitney he would be following Chase around like a puppy heaping thanks on him and trying to have the wedding as soon as possible so he wouldn’t bolt. I really hope Glenn and Babs knew it was a fake relationship, but even if they didn’t, they certainly seem to know that it wasn’t going to happen. Babs’s line about Whitney needed to let Chase have some kind of opinion was hilarious. She clearly knows that Whitney does not have a personality for marriage. 

Me too!  They showed Chase "asking his permission" from the phone in Paris, then we were told it's "4 months later" and then there he is apologizing for not "asking permission."  Four months later?  Really?  I disbelieve.

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A question about the timing of real life as opposed to reality show narrative timing. I recall that there was an instagram post by one of the cast that lead us all to surmise that production had arranged for a trip to the mountains after the trip to Paris. Speculation was that she was looking for a wedding venue.

Does anyone remember what month that was posted? Also, wondering if the vegetation in episode 1 looks like that in February? Aren't things just a little bit frosty in N.C. in the winter?

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19 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

While I’m on a rant, are we still really asking parents if we have permission to marry their daughters??  I get old-fashioned values—hell, I have old fashioned values—but I don’t think I was my dad’s property prior to my husband putting a ring on it.  While my husband and I were watching this and ignoring it, I said, “oh, he just said he wants her dad’s blessing.  I can see that.”  And then Chase changed it back right away to saying he felt foolish for not asking Glen’s “permission.”  What the fuck?

Don’t ask permission for something that you’re not prepared to go along with.  Unless a man is willing to walk away if the father doesn’t give permission, why are men still asking?  And, what about the mother’s permission?  And why aren’t women tasked with asking the permission of her fiancé’s parents too?  The whole thing is grossly antiquated.

AMEN!!!

 It is one of my pet peeves as well, so while we are at it...

what’s up with Barnacle Ashley suggesting the “Thore No More” theme?   Why is it still just assumed that the bride will change her last name to the groom’s? 

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1 hour ago, Me from ME said:

A question about the timing of real life as opposed to reality show narrative timing. I recall that there was an instagram post by one of the cast that lead us all to surmise that production had arranged for a trip to the mountains after the trip to Paris. Speculation was that she was looking for a wedding venue.

Does anyone remember what month that was posted? Also, wondering if the vegetation in episode 1 looks like that in February? Aren't things just a little bit frosty in N.C. in the winter?

I thought the trip to the mountains was in Feb.

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1 hour ago, princelina said:

Me too!  They showed Chase "asking his permission" from the phone in Paris, then we were told it's "4 months later" and then there he is apologizing for not "asking permission."  Four months later?  Really?  I disbelieve.

I think it is fake too but I just find that 'tradition' so offputting in general.....just me 🙂 Whoops, it seems this was already mentioned....sorry for the repetition 

Edited by sainte-chapelle
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1 hour ago, Me from ME said:

A question about the timing of real life as opposed to reality show narrative timing. I recall that there was an instagram post by one of the cast that lead us all to surmise that production had arranged for a trip to the mountains after the trip to Paris. Speculation was that she was looking for a wedding venue.

Does anyone remember what month that was posted? Also, wondering if the vegetation in episode 1 looks like that in February? Aren't things just a little bit frosty in N.C. in the winter?

Heather and Tal have pics from the trip on IG around the beginning of March so it was probably around the end of February.

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21 hours ago, goofygirl said:

I'm ONLY watching this for the big old kaboom!  Even though we all know it's coming....  Could NOT have happened to a more deserving person than Twitney.

II think we’re all salivating over this. I can’t wait! I’d enjoy it so much more if someone could confirm that the Twitster thought Chase really wanted to marry her.  

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40 minutes ago, sainte-chapelle said:

I think it is fake too but I just find that 'tradition' so offputting in general.....just me 🙂 Whoops, it seems this was already mentioned....sorry for the repetition 

Fake engagement or not, it’s still denigrating.  Despite her high opinion of herself, Mt Whitney isn’t exactly a symbol for emancipated womanhood. I’m not surprised she’d buy into a tradition that should have been banned in the 1960’s. 

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2 hours ago, kicotan said:

 It is one of my pet peeves as well, so while we are at it...

what’s up with Barnacle Ashley suggesting the “Thore No More” theme?   Why is it still just assumed that the bride will change her last name to the groom’s? 

I actually think that was Ashley stirring the pot. Hadn't Ryan just told them all (before Whitney and Chase arrived) that Chase would want a church wedding and would expect Whitney to take his name? And the Greensboro crew all roared with laughter and said Whitney would never do either of those things? I think Ashley wanted to get that issue out in the open to see the reaction (and maybe give a nudge to the process of Whitney and Chase actually communicating with each other.) Because they sure seem remarkably clueless when it comes to the basics of planning a married life. Like where they intend to live. Whether and when they are going to try and start a family. How they are going to manage their finances.  What their interaction with each other's family is going to look like. What about the pets - Chase said his dog doesn't get along with cats - is Whitney going to turn the cats over to her mother? Is Chase going to get rid of Piper? (Maybe Sara could take her.) They're in their thirties! You'd think they'd have a more sophisticated understanding of what matrimony is. Aren't they a little old to have their whole focus be on planning the party? 

More proof, if any more is needed, that this whole engagement was only a story line, and that Chase had about as much interest in marrying Whitney as he did in eating her delicious cooking. Or in having a couple of root canals.

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32 minutes ago, Ketzel said:

I actually think that was Ashley stirring the pot. Hadn't Ryan just told them all (before Whitney and Chase arrived) that Chase would want a church wedding and would expect Whitney to take his name? And the Greensboro crew all roared with laughter and said Whitney would never do either of those things? I think Ashley wanted to get that issue out in the open to see the reaction (and maybe give a nudge to the process of Whitney and Chase actually communicating with each other.) Because they sure seem remarkably clueless when it comes to the basics of planning a married life. Like where they intend to live. Whether and when they are going to try and start a family. How they are going to manage their finances.  What their interaction with each other's family is going to look like. What about the pets - Chase said his dog doesn't get along with cats - is Whitney going to turn the cats over to her mother? Is Chase going to get rid of Piper? (Maybe Sara could take her.) They're in their thirties! You'd think they'd have a more sophisticated understanding of what matrimony is. Aren't they a little old to have their whole focus be on planning the party? 

More proof, if any more is needed, that this whole engagement was only a story line, and that Chase had about as much interest in marrying Whitney as he did in eating her delicious cooking. Or in having a couple of root canals.

Yes, Ashley is the pot stirrer like how she let it “slip” in front of Heather that Buddy’s clothes were at Whitney’s in Charlotte last season.

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13 hours ago, sainte-chapelle said:

It also irked me how Glen went on and on about 'tradition' and Chase not asking his permission. She is a grown woman who does not need your approval Glen.  She isn't a piece of property. 

Totally agree with your first sentence, but snorted over the rest.  Of *course* Chase needed Glen's permission--do you realize how much of an investment Glen has in Whitney?  The permission-asking wasn't because it's what a southern gentleman would do; it's because Chase didn't want this to be a hostile takeover.

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3 hours ago, Mothra said:

Totally agree with your first sentence, but snorted over the rest.  Of *course* Chase needed Glen's permission--do you realize how much of an investment Glen has in Whitney?  The permission-asking wasn't because it's what a southern gentleman would do; it's because Chase didn't want this to be a hostile takeover.

True...also Whitney and 'grown woman' do not belong in the same sentence. 🙂

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Hi all! I don't watch this show (have only seen bits and pieces) but I do read these forums for the most excellent snark. I saw a little bit a few nights ago about the trip to the mountain house. Those people (to me) are not "friends" everyone was so fake and acted like a bunch of strangers. The car ride with Twit and Chase seemed so awkward especially for Chase who looked like he wanted to be anywhere else but there. Why was he sucking up to Twit's dad so much? Asking for her hand in marriage? Who does that anymore? And her mom saying "We have been wanting to get rid of her for a long time now" LOL!! Twit seems to be one of the most self-centered people I have ever seen. The only person I liked was the gay guy (don't know his name). And there is NO WAY I would get in a hot tub with someone who admits they pee in warm water-does she piss (if and when) she takes a bath too? I don't blame Chase for bailing on the relationship (if there ever was one) and wish TLC would just shut this show down. Let Twit and Buddy ride off into the sunset since he's the only one who seems to really care about her and they can live their delusional lives in peace and leave the rest of us alone. 

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Quote

Aren't things just a little bit frosty in N.C. in the winter?

They can be, particularly in the mountains. However, if memory serves (last winter seems like a million years ago) the East coast had a pretty mild winter.

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Unpopular opinion time. I have a 29 year old daughter on the verge of getting engaged and a 34 year old son who’s about to celebrate his 8th wedding anniversary. My daughter isn’t our property but her very modern boyfriend has told her he’ll show respect to us by “asking for our blessing” to get engaged. My son spoke to his father in law too. Neither of them has/had any expectation that my husband/daughter in law’s dad would try to exercise veto power. Instead, they both understand that you’re joining a family and it’s never a bad idea to be polite. We didn’t owe our daughter anything after she turned 18 but we continued to help her with college, grad school and a move across the country. The “asking for a blessing” is like many actions indicated by good etiquette: the person on the receiving end is supposed to be pleasantly surprised that the other person was so kind, without being so gauche as to mention a failure if one occurs. (That’s why I still believe that any instruction on an invitation regarding gifts for yourself is tacky.) We wouldn’t demand that our daughter’s boyfriend talk to us pre-engagement, but since he knows we’re supportive, why not? It’s a milestone we’d love to be included in. He’s also aware that we’re planning to stick to tradition as parents of the bride and pay for the wedding. And that my daughter wants her dad to “give her away.” They’ll go on a honeymoon that tradition also dictates is paid for by his parents. And they’ll have wedding attire. Why bother with parts of tradition and toss out the one that you’ve decided casts doubts on what the bride’s dad thinks is his role in his daughter’s life? Not everything has to be about making sure you receive “respect” while you insist you don’t need to show some, too. 

Edited by AUJulia
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18 hours ago, 3girlsforus said:

I thought the trip to the mountains was in Feb.

I don't think so. It's cold in the NC mountains in Feb. That's all subjective, though. I call climate in the 40's cold while others don't think it's cold until the temps are in the 20's. Depends on what you're used to, I guess. One sure thing, though, the leaves would have all been off the trees. A dead giveaway that it wasn't Feb or even Jan.   

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6 hours ago, AUJulia said:

Unpopular opinion time. I have a 29 year old daughter on the verge of getting engaged and a 34 year old son who’s about to celebrate his 8th wedding anniversary. My daughter isn’t our property but her very modern boyfriend has told her he’ll show respect to us by “asking for our blessing” to get engaged. My son spoke to his father in law too. Neither of them has/had any expectation that my husband/daughter in law’s dad would try to exercise veto power. Instead, they both understand that you’re joining a family and it’s never a bad idea to be polite. We didn’t owe our daughter anything after she turned 18 but we continued to help her with college, grad school and a move across the country. The “asking for a blessing” is like many actions indicated by good etiquette: the person on the receiving end is supposed to be pleasantly surprised that the other person was so kind, without being so gauche as to mention a failure if one occurs. (That’s why I still believe that any instruction on an invitation regarding gifts for yourself is tacky.) We wouldn’t demand that our daughter’s boyfriend talk to us pre-engagement, but since he knows we’re supportive, why not? It’s a milestone we’d love to be included in. He’s also aware that we’re planning to stick to tradition as parents of the bride and pay for the wedding. And that my daughter wants her dad to “give her away.” They’ll go on a honeymoon that tradition also dictates is paid for by his parents. And they’ll have wedding attire. Why bother with parts of tradition and toss out the one that you’ve decided casts doubts on what the bride’s dad thinks is his role in his daughter’s life? Not everything has to be about making sure you receive “respect” while you insist you don’t need to show some, too. 

I feel that is different though since he asked the both of you and not just your husband. It was a lovely gesture that included both parents. Some of my friends included family in the proposal. I had both my parents walk me down the aisle and give me away. We paid for our wedding and honeymoon ourselves.  I dont think it is a 'tossing out' of traditions, more of an evolution as times change.  Women didn't even wear white wedding dresses that often until Queen Victoria married Albert. If Whit had said "I wish he had spoken to my parents first" I would have felt differently.  If Chase and her family were close I would have felt differently.  What we have here is a daughter who is pushing 40 getting 'engaged' to some dude (among other poor life choices)  she just met while Glen bleats about 'tradition' and how not honouring that  is a sign of things to come. It Is all scripted nonsense of course. I think the rest of the season will be a hard pass.

Edited by sainte-chapelle
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1 hour ago, bichonblitz said:

I don't think so. It's cold in the NC mountains in Feb. That's all subjective, though. I call climate in the 40's cold while others don't think it's cold until the temps are in the 20's. Depends on what you're used to, I guess. One sure thing, though, the leaves would have all been off the trees. A dead giveaway that it wasn't Feb or even Jan.   

I was one of the people that thought the trip was in February but when did they get engaged again?  Tal, Heather,and Chase all posted their mountain pics between March 1-3.  I mean they could have been told to post them that time for some reason but I actually don’t remember when they got engaged. Was it in the Fall?

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1 hour ago, bichonblitz said:

I don't think so. It's cold in the NC mountains in Feb. That's all subjective, though. I call climate in the 40's cold while others don't think it's cold until the temps are in the 20's. Depends on what you're used to, I guess. One sure thing, though, the leaves would have all been off the trees. A dead giveaway that it wasn't Feb or even Jan.   

I was basing my estimate on the fact that multiple of the cast posted photos of the mountain trip in late Feb, early March. 

1 minute ago, Irate Panda said:

I was one of the people that thought the trip was in February but when did they get engaged again?  Tal, Heather,and Chase all posted their mountain pics between March 1-3.  I mean they could have been told to post them that time for some reason but I actually don’t remember when they got engaged. Was it in the Fall?

They got engaged in Paris which was in October but they didn’t announce it until November I think or maybe early December along with the announcement of the premiere date for the new season. 😂😂😂😂

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I hate-watch this show just about as passionately as every show in the Teen Mom franchise.  I loathe both shows and their subjects equally, but the difference with this one is that there are no tiny children and vulnerable preteens involved, so my give-a-shit only goes so far.  Everyone is grown and free to make all of the grievous, life-ruining errors their hearts desire.  However . . .

First, Whitney has lost no weight.  The comparisons between this show and Ruby (anyone remember that?) are piling up.  I have a weight issue myself, so believe me when I say that there is no body shame going on here, but I thought the whole point of this show was to follow Whitney's journey to improved health.  Instead, we're stuck watching her and a bunch of her utterly boring "friends" hang out, bicker, and be forced to focus all of their energy on Whitney, who still sucks all of the air out of every room she enters.  None of them seem to particularly like Whitney, much less each other.  Todd has always oh-so-delicately shaded her at every opportunity, but it's really bad now.  I would be devastated to know that my friends laughed at me behind my back and thought so poorly of me.

The scene in the hot tub was like something out of a middle school boy-girl party.  "Stop touching me!"  "You're making Chase jealous!"  "Don't be mean to my boyfriend!"  Whitney was absolutely glowing at the thought of Chase and Buddy "battling" over her.  These people are absolutely repugnant.  The hike in the woods is something that Whitney should not have attempted, especially not with so many other people.  When you know that you're not physically up to something, the polite thing to do is to allow others to go ahead without you so that you're not a burden to everyone else.  This is especially true when you need so much assistance from others just to move.  Might want to speak to people a little more nicely when you know you're going to need them to lug your body out of a mudhole.

P.S. Buddy, cutting back on substance use enough to kinda function is not sobriety.  I would stake my next two paychecks on the fact that you are not sober. 

Edited by Suzy Rhapsody
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I hate Buddy, so I'm loath to do ask this, but...

...takes deep breath...

...why was Whitney so pissed off at him at the end of this episode? Because he very reasonably pointed that she could hurt herself? THAT concern was worthy of one of her trademark shit fits?

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4 hours ago, AUJulia said:

Unpopular opinion time. I have a 29 year old daughter on the verge of getting engaged and a 34 year old son who’s about to celebrate his 8th wedding anniversary. My daughter isn’t our property but her very modern boyfriend has told her he’ll show respect to us by “asking for our blessing” to get engaged. My son spoke to his father in law too. Neither of them has/had any expectation that my husband/daughter in law’s dad would try to exercise veto power. Instead, they both understand that you’re joining a family and it’s never a bad idea to be polite. We didn’t owe our daughter anything after she turned 18 but we continued to help her with college, grad school and a move across the country. The “asking for a blessing” is like many actions indicated by good etiquette: the person on the receiving end is supposed to be pleasantly surprised that the other person was so kind, without being so gauche as to mention a failure if one occurs. (That’s why I still believe that any instruction on an invitation regarding gifts for yourself is tacky.) We wouldn’t demand that our daughter’s boyfriend talk to us pre-engagement, but since he knows we’re supportive, why not? It’s a milestone we’d love to be included in. He’s also aware that we’re planning to stick to tradition as parents of the bride and pay for the wedding. And that my daughter wants her dad to “give her away.” They’ll go on a honeymoon that tradition also dictates is paid for by his parents. And they’ll have wedding attire. Why bother with parts of tradition and toss out the one that you’ve decided casts doubts on what the bride’s dad thinks is his role in his daughter’s life? Not everything has to be about making sure you receive “respect” while you insist you don’t need to show some, too. 

I’m just quoting all of this, because you made really good points.  My favorite economist, Thomas Sowell, says that sometimes we only realize why we had laws in the first place when we repeal them and all hell breaks loose.  

So I take your point that throwing out this piece of tradition—whilst keeping the traditions that are convenient—can be like throwing the baby out with the bath water.  

I decided to write about it for a similar reason I decided to write about Buddy messing the ninth step up with the eighth step—I’m pedantic about language, so while I find asking for a blessing to be completely fine and respectful (especially in the scenario you outlined above), Chase specifically said “permission,” which was my objection.  

And my main objection to “asking” permission isn’t even the property argument that I made up thread.  That’s my secondary argument.  My main argument is that it’s super poor form to ask permission for something one fully intends to do anyway.  That is why a blessing vs. permission are two completely different animals to me. 

This all reminds me of that song Marry That Girl, where the guy doesn’t get permission from his girlfriend’s dad to marry his daughter, and the whole point of the song is that he’s going to “marry her anyway.”  Like...why did you ask, then?  (And I am actually fond of that song; I just think the protagonist’s point is kinda silly).  

It’s as if I applied to a college, got rejected, and then sued to get in.  

This is all an academic exercise, as we know it’s not real, but I find the discussion interesting, sort of like the discussion we had last season as to what extent Chase’s parents had a right to weigh in on his love life/future grandchildren, even though we all sort of suspected it was fake then too.  

I remember last season we also had the discussion about whether it was weird for Chase to call Glen by his first name, and my opinion on that is that two adults should either call each other “Mister Thore and Mister Severino” or they should be on a first name basis.  Chase is an adult, so I have no idea why he would have to address Glen formally, when Glen gets to call Chase by his (fake) first name. 

I guess my entire point is that I think traditions are important, and society is walking a dangerous line when we start to throw them out willy nilly, but it’s also important to examine everything we do.  I only follow traditions I understand and endorse, but I take the time to try to understand something that might ring incorrect to me at first glance.  If Chase had just been precise in his language, I wouldn’t have raised an objection.  I don’t think Chase is very smart.  

Now this is my unpopular opinion:  I think Whitney dodged a bullet.  No self-respecting man holds himself out as engaged publicly and then gets another woman pregnant publicly.  Either you get your paycheck and play dutiful fiancé or you follow you dreams and marry another female and procreate with her.  To do both at the same time makes him...a cad (I could say worse, but I’ll keep it rated G).  

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I know it's relatively minor in the grand scheme of her disastrous personality, but did anyone else find that scene where Whitney desperately wanted someone to notice her ring super embarrassing? Like, she brought her phone up and held it in a super obvious way you don't normally hold a phone if you're actually using it, said pretty loudly "WELL WE'RE START NAVIGATING..." and just the whole thing made me physically cringe. Either don't act weird and let people notice it naturally, or just show it off from the start. Don't do this weird fake casual thing that makes you look dumb. She's just such a sad person.

Edited by missnoa
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6 hours ago, AUJulia said:

Instead, they both understand that you’re joining a family

They aren't joining a family, they are creating a new family. It's why inheritances are most often not considered community property even in community property states, or why parents most often don't continue to have medical access and decision making privileges in the case of the incapacitated married child, or the spouse can't do the same for their incapacitated in-law or claim part of their estate in the event of death.

Your idea sounds nice and all, but it is legally and societally not correct, they are not joining your family at all, they are allowing access to their at their pleasure, not yours.

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2 hours ago, the-grey-lady said:

I hate Buddy, so I'm loath to do ask this, but...

...takes deep breath...

...why was Whitney so pissed off at him at the end of this episode? Because he very reasonably pointed that she could hurt herself? THAT concern was worthy of one of her trademark shit fits?

Apparently so. I admit that I laughed loud and hard when Whit was trying to get over the log and Buddy said sarcastically " Why don't you just walk around it?"

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2 hours ago, the-grey-lady said:

I hate Buddy, so I'm loath to do ask this, but...

...takes deep breath...

...why was Whitney so pissed off at him at the end of this episode? Because he very reasonably pointed that she could hurt herself? THAT concern was worthy of one of her trademark shit fits?

I found this befuddling as well.

I remember back during that Hawaiian marathon when she was out of breath before she even got onto the path and then caterwauled about her goddamned feet the entire time, Buddy had a similar talk (and in a similar tone) with her suggesting she should just drop out of the marathon since clearly she was not able to handle it.  She did not appear to be nearly as nasty with him during that conversation as she did this time around.  

I honestly think this asshole believed Chase was really in love with the TLC paycheck her and figured Buddy was disposable at that point in filming., so she had no problem holding Buddy's TLC check over his head.  

It's all good though, because soon we will see her get slapped back into reality.  

And I'm here for it  😄 

 

 

handwring.gif

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1 hour ago, LibertarianSlut said:

 I think Whitney dodged a bullet.  No self-respecting man holds himself out as engaged publicly and then gets another woman pregnant publicly.  Either you get your paycheck and play dutiful fiancé or you follow you dreams and marry another female and procreate with her.  To do both at the same time makes him...a cad (I could say worse, but I’ll keep it rated G).  

Assuming, of course, that there was a bullet to dodge, I totally agree that a fiance who could impregnate another woman while the bride-to-be is rapturously planning the wedding is not  worthy of a lifetime commitment. However, when the man in question is hired to play the role of the lead's fiance on a heavily scripted "reality" show, and he screws up the script by knocking up his actual girlfriend,  I think the only one that gets to dodge anything is Chase,  provided he has a good agent or lawyer who can negotiate his way out of whatever penalty clause the production company put into the contract. (I'm sure there's some generalized boilerplate language about not disclosing behind-the-scenes info, or not doing things that publicly undermine the story line in which he appears.)

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