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S05.E16: Cool as a Cucumber


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21 minutes ago, psychoticstate said:

get Tom being frustrated over Musselgate.  If he serves frozen mussels and the guests gripe about them not being fresh, it's Tom who is on the line about it.

Except he continued to bitch about it after they supplied him with 2 kilos of fresh mussels now saying he had too many mussels which made no sense because he should just use the fresh and the other kilo would be fine in the freezer because they were packed for that! 

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8 minutes ago, biakbiak said:

Except he continued to bitch about it after they supplied him with 2 kilos of fresh mussels now saying he had too many mussels which made no sense because he should just use the fresh and the other kilo would be fine in the freezer because they were packed for that! 

Oh, thanks for filling me in.  My ears were all filled up with "I'm weighing it!  I'm texting them the picture!  don't apologize!  grr grr grr!" and I missed the above.

I think it's the vowel sounds that throw me off most in some of their accents (my issue, not theirs).  Bugsy threw R and J together in the salon and told them to work it out "Ay yay say pee."  At least I could follow that one.

 

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Actually, how does a boat like this have NO PLANS for a backup person to find and cut a cucumber if the chef really IS on a break?  Or got an emergency call?  Or cracked a shin or slipped and fell?  Or doesn't want to be on call 18 hours a day, which really isn't all that unreasonable.

It's a bit weird not to have the second or third stew prepared for snacks.  Even if it happens twice every five charters.

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5 minutes ago, Lassus said:

 

Actually, how does a boat like this have NO PLANS for a backup person to find and cut a cucumber if the chef really IS on a break

 

Well the back up plan should have been to find a stew since all three wouldn’t be on break. I don’t know why the guests didn’t mention that both Aesha and Jess were on deck with the other guests when she was radioing aroundl, they knew that Is where they were because they had just left them. 

Also, Sandy was complaining a few weeks ago that they didn’t show all the ways she helped out so I don’t know why she couldn’t have cut a cucumber. I mean she is so into food she is starting a restaurant with a pandemic devastating the food hospitality industry so you think she could manage it!

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4 hours ago, Jobiska said:

Tom and his intolerance for apologies--I mean, I understand being frustrated that he got 1 kilo of frozen mussels instead of 2 of fresh, but it's not the fault of the poor delivery people, who kindly apologized for their company's screw-up, and it's also not the tightest bind a chef has been in on this show--I know there have been times when a guest wanted something that wasn't there when they were already out at sea, but can't recall what.

And his snobbish commentary about how anyone who had taste would want fresh mussels and those who would eat frozen were without taste (clearly). 

Clearly Tom and Malia are a match made in heaven. The minute something doesn't go their way, they turn into assholes.

 

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39 minutes ago, Pop Tart said:

And his snobbish commentary about how anyone who had taste would want fresh mussels and those who would eat frozen were without taste (clearly). 

Tom Colicchio to the thread, please.

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I had to give props to Sandy for telling Malia to let Tom do his job and stop interfering in the previews. I can’t wait to see her face. Malia seems afraid Tom will breakup with up her over him agreeing to step in as chef because he can’t handle it since he’s used to having two other chefs with him. He bit off more than he can chew and is taking it out on everyone else. He seems pretty misanthropic to me. 

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Why did the guest wander into the galley to ask for snacks when there were two stews on deck?  Of course Aesha was having a jui jitsui lesson (probably butchered that spelling) but that's actually what they are there for so the guest should have asked one of them.  Not excusing Tom's hatefulness, but he should be able to take a break from time to time (although I agree it would be nice if he had prepared snacks and left them in the frig).

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Did anyone else think that this should have been the background music when Rob and Jess were tyring to fix their relationship?  They were both soooo deep into their feelings and trying to explain that to each other.  But, what it basically boils down to, as we saw later in the episode, is that Rob can be a little flirty and Jess can be super jealous! 

 

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Since I have never been on a private yacht, I don't know whether the crew is obligated to "play" with the guests or if it's  just this TLC yacht?  It seems like they are busy enough doing their assigned each maintenance jobs (laundry, putting out the equipment, serving, cooking, cleaning, etc.), then to be expected to do martial arts, ride jet skis, dance in skimpy costumes, frisbee games, and so on.  It seems like many of those play activities could be done by a hired person like they do for belly dancing, mariachis, massages....

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So it's ok , with Sandy, for everyone to get wasted that they can barely function the next day.  But God forbid Hannah might have had to take a valium.  So drunk that Sandy let the crew rest up while while they were sailing to the next port.

Tom was all over Malia in the bunk, but she said she was trying to rest.  Guess she has to please her man in between her bosun and sous chef duties.

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9 hours ago, biakbiak said:

Except he continued to bitch about it after they supplied him with 2 kilos of fresh mussels now saying he had too many mussels which made no sense because he should just use the fresh and the other kilo would be fine in the freezer because they were packed for that! 

I am happy that the supplier provided the fresh mussels free of charge. They apologized for the mistake. Tom should calm down.

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13 hours ago, Emmeline said:

I like Alesha and her voice doesn’t bother me.  I felt bad for her on the night out.  Everyone is hooked up with someone and she is the odd man out.  I just think she’s ready to go home and feels lonely.

Of course, I'm sure skanky old Pete would be glad to help a girl out. 😉 Maybe that's part of the reaosn she's feeling lonely.

I do find Aesha a bit much from time to time, but overall she seems easy to work with and great with the guests. If I were on a super yacht, I'd want someone like her serving me. Whereas Hannah not-so-covertly rolled her eyes at the guests half the time, Aesha enthusiastically jumps into to doing pretty much whatever the guests want and actually enjoys herself.

Tom really is an asshole, jeez. He is wound so tight, any little thing seems to send him flying into a rage.

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6 hours ago, Mstk3000 said:

I have watched all seasons of BD original and BDM and do not remember seeing a chef taking a break in the middle of the day

I'm pretty sure a chef took a break in the middle of the day somewhere there.

Him being an asshole all the time is the problem, not so much a break in the middle of the day.

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Come on, the chef has to be up to make breakfast in the morning for both the crew and the guests, provides lunch for all of the same, provides snacks throughout the day and then has to cook a full dinner service which often times does not happen until late in the evening - of course they should take a break at some point during the day.  I wouldn't want someone handling galley equipment and knives on a seriously limited amount of time!  Just not be a total arse about it please!

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The chef job looks exhausting,  and I agree they deserve breaks.  The thing is he kept saying he just wanted his 15 min break,  when the camera showed he had been on one for 18 min and he was still in his underwear in bed.  

I realize it would seem easier for a stew to do it, but we saw what Rocky did.  Is that really the best solution for a captain obsessed with food quality?  Maybe Sandy wanted only Tom doing it. He was a dick for taking it out on Aeasha. 

Him and Malia are being roasted on Twitter still.  

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This episode did remind me of why I will never be thin and that’s because i would never in a million years consider cucumbers and a little olive oil a snack!! And I adore cucumbers.

Edited by biakbiak
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10 hours ago, Mstk3000 said:

I was really surprised and dismayed by Tom's behavior.  I have watched all seasons of BD original and BDM and do not remember seeing a chef taking a break in the middle of the day (maybe Leon but he was kind of on a constant break).  People think of Ben as temperamental, with good reason, but I remember a time when a stew was afraid to wake him up in the middle of the night, after a 12-hour day, because the guests wanted home-made chocolate chip cookies.  The stew (I can't remember who or even which show it was, Ben has been on both) did so anyway, and Ben was all "no worries, it's my job, of course I will make the cookies."  Yet Tom the Michelin man is abusive to Ayesha when he has to interrupt his mid-day break to make snacks, even when she is trying to help by doing the avocado herself.  He and Malia deserve each other.

Leon and his dirty oven were the ones that indirectly almost burned down the yacht because he couldn’t be bothered to get out of bed when guests wanted a midnight snack. A chef is one of those positions where, as long as even one guest is moving around, you are on duty, even if you take a break or go to bed. You’d think a five-star yacht chef like Tom would accept that by now, or find another line of work. And, since food factors so much into the tip, if the chef cares about that, he would appreciate the opportunity to make something special rather than yell at a stew for doing her job (or letting her whip up frozen pizzas, microwave popcorn, or crappy quesadillas) while he takes five, or ten, or...

Sounds like Tom is there for one reason only, and if Sandy had a problem with Hannah and Conrad being distracted, well she ain’t seen nothin’ yet. 

 

 

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16 minutes ago, biakbiak said:

This episode did remind me of why I will never be thin and that’s because it would never in a million years consider cucumbers and a little olive oil a snack!! And I adore cucumbers.

Indeed!  And I'm allergic to cucumbers (and cantaloupe and watermelon).  How bout some crabmeat dip on some bread?

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On 9/14/2020 at 10:42 PM, PaperTree said:

I just don't get the Jess Rob drama.  Maybe that's why I'm an old single guy.

I'm an old married lady but I don't get it either. I think neither of them is very smart, or remotely capable of communicating thoughts more complicated that "I wanna suck face with you"

 

Edited by dleighg
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There are 2 videos on Bravo about the cucumber incident.  Tom is still being a twat, making comments on how easy it is to cut a cucumber.  Next video is where it's admitted he NEVER told anyone but Malia he was going to take a 'nap'.  Of course Sandy and Malia go on making excuses for his sorry ass. 

I wouldn't cut a cucumber for that asshole, do it yourself dickhead. 

https://www.bravotv.com/below-deck-mediterranean-after-show/season-5/videos/chef-tom-checketts-and-captain-sandy-break-down

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On 9/14/2020 at 10:03 PM, pieinmyeye said:

Why charter a boat only to turn around and go to the beach to play frisbee?

 

and somehow I don't think there was that much actual free space available- I imagine they annoyed the other beach-goers.

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30 minutes ago, ihartcoffee said:

There are 2 videos on Bravo about the cucumber incident.  Tom is still being a twat, making comments on how easy it is to cut a cucumber.  Next video is where it's admitted he NEVER told anyone but Malia he was going to take a 'nap'.  Of course Sandy and Malia go on making excuses for his sorry ass. 

I wouldn't cut a cucumber for that asshole, do it yourself dickhead. 

Thanks for that.  Major damage control going on.  Again.  Sandy is just a bad captain.

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I have to admire Capt Interruptus for not giving two shits about having “woken up”  Tom. I really wish she had been in the kitchen when he got there. How did he not know it was Sandy’s call when she was the one who came to get him?

I didn’t need to see Tom’s teabag when he was getting out of the bunk.

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7 minutes ago, dangwoodchucks said:

How did he not know it was Sandy’s call when she was the one who came to get him?

 

I totally agree that he was a jerk, but on that I figure that he (stupidly) thought that the guests asked for cucumbers, Aesha said "I dunno know how" and Sandy agreed with that and went to get him. Of course NONE of that makes sense. He was just in a super whiny mood. And it should have been obvious to anyone who's not an idiot that she was saying she was sorry "for his situation," not that she was sorry that she didn't know how to cut up a cucumber.

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On 9/14/2020 at 9:03 PM, pieinmyeye said:

Why charter a boat only to turn around and go to the beach to play frisbee?

 

Similarly, why travel to Spain and then ask the British chef to make you tapas? Of course, that's an ongoing pet peeve of mine with this show. The guests are in these exotic locations and yet prefer dining on the yacht with familiar foods, as opposed to trying the cuisines of where they're visiting. But that's just me.

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1 minute ago, candle96 said:

Similarly, why travel to Spain and then ask the British chef to make you tapas? Of course, that's an ongoing pet peeve of mine with this show. The guests are in these exotic locations and yet prefer dining on the yacht with familiar foods, as opposed to trying the cuisines of where they're visiting. But that's just me.

How is eating tapas in Spain about familiar foods and not trying the cuisine of Spain? Do you mean just because Tom is British? It’s also should be noted that we are probably seeing just two or three days of a longer trip.

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I thought Tom was jerk-ish to Aeisha earlier on, when he gave her the plate with baguette toasts on it, and they were slipping and sliding off the plate while the poor woman was trying to bring them upstairs.  Why didn't he put them in a basket with a napkin, which is the way they're served in Spain (and France) anyway?  He loves to blame his poor serving/cooking/napping skills on others, doesn't he?

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Jesus they had to do a lenghty clip with Sandy, Malia, and production all agreeing that this was not Tom's fault.  Oh the horrors of waking up Tom even though he didn't tell anyone but Malia that he was going on a break. The stews didn't know that. Sandy even threw Bugs under the bus and said it was the job of the chief stew to tend to the guests and anticipate their every desire.  So now if Tom and Malia want to "nap" Bugs and the rest of interior better get with making those snacks. I never saw such ringing of hands over letting us know  that Tom was the innocent victim in this . 

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2 hours ago, MartyQui said:

I thought Tom was jerk-ish to Aeisha earlier on, when he gave her the plate with baguette toasts on it, and they were slipping and sliding off the plate while the poor woman was trying to bring them upstairs.  Why didn't he put them in a basket with a napkin, which is the way they're served in Spain (and France) anyway?  He loves to blame his poor serving/cooking/napping skills on others, doesn't he?

Meh.  I'll disagree here.  Aesha being unable to carry a plate of food is not actually Tom's fault.

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On 9/15/2020 at 1:17 AM, dangwoodchucks said:

You have to be a special kind of dick to make perpetually-happy Aesha cry. Condescending bastard.

Annoying voice aside, there are times when Aesha’s enthusiasm makes me smile. This episode it was when the guest said it was her turn for a lesson. Her response was, “My turn? Yayyyyyyyy!” 

I don’t remember ever seeing the deck crew helping with the dishwashing as much as this season.

Pete at the club! Pete at the van and there to assist Bugs when she fell! Pete walking back to the boat! Pete standing at the bow! Pete greeting the guests! Pete carrying luggage! Pete on the the tender! Pete playing frisbee! Pete back on the boat! Pete rinsing and drying dishes! Did I miss any?

He won't even do his own plating, so I'm sure dish washing is way down there on the list of things he won't lower himself to do.

 

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What was it they wanted as a snack?  Cucumber with olive oil and salt?  Or just oil?

 

On 9/15/2020 at 2:25 PM, biakbiak said:

I mean she is so into food she is starting a restaurant with a pandemic devastating the food hospitality industry so you think she could manage it!

 

What?  Sandy is opening a restaurant?

 

On 9/15/2020 at 9:57 AM, lgprimes said:

Wow . Kate and Hannah’s absences really highlight the importance of having a quick-witted woman on these BD shows. It’s a snooze fest without their entertaining quips.
 

Bugs is a good stew, but not very entertaining on tv.

 

On 9/15/2020 at 3:13 PM, Kiss my mutt said:

I had to give props to Sandy for telling Malia to let Tom do his job and stop interfering in the previews. I can’t wait to see her face. Malia seems afraid Tom will breakup with up her over him agreeing to step in as chef because he can’t handle it since he’s used to having two other chefs with him. He bit off more than he can chew and is taking it out on everyone else. He seems pretty misanthropic to me. 

Malia is the very definition of CODEPENDENT!  She is carrying all of Tom's burdens.  

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14 hours ago, RoxiP said:

Aesha said that she had barely been home for the past 5 years - I think it is one of those things that when you haven't been home for a while and you are planning to go all the sudden you get really homesick, whereas before you planned a trip home just went about your life not thinking about it. 

That makes sense.

On 9/15/2020 at 12:43 PM, Jobiska said:

I get it's the culture on this boat (or this show) to have the entire crew, supervisors and those that report to them, to go out drinking together

I would not fraternize outside the boat.  I hate watching them get so drunk.

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1 hour ago, heatherchandler said:

What?  Sandy is opening a restaurant?

 

Yes she bought an old firehouse in Jacksonville nowhere near the water and turning it into a yacht themed restaurant. 

And yes they wanted cut up cucumber with olive oil and sea salt (though a better tasting snack with fewer calories would be cucumber, vinegar, and salt) and then slliced up avocado. 

Edited by biakbiak
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3 hours ago, Lassus said:

Meh.  I'll disagree here.  Aesha being unable to carry a plate of food is not actually Tom's fault.

It is Tom’s fault the way they were haphazardly stacked. Put bread in a basket or lay them in a row, you don’t make a toast tower. Aesha had barely moved the plate when the top ones fell over.

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2 hours ago, biakbiak said:

Yes she bought an old firehouse in Jacksonville nowhere near the water and turning it into a yacht themed restaurant. 

And yes they wanted cut up cucumber with olive oil and sea salt (though a better tasting snack with fewer calories would be cucumber, vinegar, and salt) and then slliced up avocado. 

Hmmmm that’s interesting.  Who opens a restaurant now??  
 

Yeah cucs with vinegar, salt are so good!  I wouldn’t want to drizzle/dip them in oil without the vinegar.

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6 hours ago, biakbiak said:

And yes they wanted cut up cucumber with olive oil and sea salt (though a better tasting snack with fewer calories would be cucumber, vinegar, and salt) and then slliced up avocado. 

 

3 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

Yeah cucs with vinegar, salt are so good!  I wouldn’t want to drizzle/dip them in oil without the vinegar.

Don't forget the black pepper! Aw!💓 My mom used to make cucumber salad all the time when I was a kid.

Aesha had a Freudian slip on WWHL. She was saying that she just has a bubbly personality & WASN'T flirting w/ Rob, but it initially came out as: I WAS flirting w/ Rob. Even he snickered. She's a nice person; but, she knew what she was doing. Jessica was being kind of ridiculous, but Aesha should have backed away once she noticed there was a problem. Hugging on them & half inviting herself on their trip to Bali!? Um, yeah, I thought you were homesick? & telling Jessica her hair looked like a cat's was shady. Mm-hm, I see you Aesha.

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14 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

What?  Sandy is opening a restaurant?

It's called Maritime 618. I feel sorry for the chef(s).

https://www.news4jax.com/news/local/2020/09/15/reality-tv-star-says-jacksonville-restaurant-will-feature-celebrity-chefs-edgy-vibe/

Here are the floor plans. Wouldn't be surprised if there was an extra chair at each table. Just in case, you know, the owner wants to check on how the guests are enjoying the food.

https://tinyurl.com/y6y6gamb

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7 hours ago, NowVoyager said:

 

Don't forget the black pepper! Aw!💓 My mom used to make cucumber salad all the time when I was a kid.

 

Black pepper on EVERYTHING!

I am realizing that the cucumbers with salt & oil must be a keto thing.  They probably wanted bread dipped in salt & oil, and can't eat bread so... Also vinegar is not on the keto diet, but oil is.  I've done keto but if I was on a yacht with anything I want to eat at my beck and call, I would eat everything!

 

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22 minutes ago, dsteele said:

The comments on the article are pretty funny. And I have to say, Sandy has remarkably few "ideas" about what this is going to be, other than throwing in some "captain-y" stuff about being flexible and willing to "change direction".

Sounds like she's thinking "cool hip young folks" and the location is "sketchy rundown dangerous"

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