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S01.E10: The Cause the Cure

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BBC1 is airing two episodes per week while HBO is airing only one episode per week. If you enter this thread before the US air date, you may encounter spoilers!

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After Simon inadvertently drops a bomb on Arabella, she heads to her mum’s birthday dinner, where painful, long-forgotten memories bubble to the surface.

Kwame’s no-strings-attached hook-up bender leads him to Tyrone, a stranger in search of a different kind of connection.

Original UK air date: 7/7/20
Original US air date: 8/10/20

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I’m not embarrassed to admit I Was sobbing during Kwame’s hug and again as the credits rolled. Michelle Greenidge as her mother nailed that scene. 
I thought Fleabag was amazing, but this show was on another level. Wow. 

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It was sad to see how some people like Arabella still idealize their shitty parents even when they're old enough to know better. Her father was clearly an absent parent who did not prioritize his kids since he wouldn't give his own kid a key to his house which resulted in her climbing in through the window, and he was unable to follow through on simple things like promising to take his kids to McDonald's.

Poor Nick. He has their dad's number and therefore has much more realistic expectations of him.

Oh, Bella. When she realized that Terry had told Simon to lie to her, that must have broken her heart. I'm glad she finally told her mom though. As hard as Terry has been trying, I think she needed the emotional support of her mom. But I felt so awful for her mom. No mother ever wants to hear that happened to their child (let alone on their birthday).

Terry really has tried to be everything for Bella over the last year and I think that 90% of it was because she loves Bella (and 10% out of guilt). I was kind of proud of Bella when she decided to go back to the bar for the first time in the previous episode, but going back night after night seems unhealthy, which is why I was glad that Terry wasn't afraid to tell her so.

Awww, I loved when Kwame finally dropped his aggressive "I'm just here for sex" act and got some real intimacy from a hug.

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Arabella forgives Simon, but learns of Terry’s role.

Then the mother’s birthday get together, with the unexpected visit from Auntie Lenora triggering that unpleasant memory.  Bro thinks Bella doesn’t remember Auntie L. because she was out of it when they were kids but she was carrying the burden of discovering Daddy’s side piece.

Turns out mother knew and has been over it for years.

Is that why Bella forgives Terry or doesn’t let her spit out her admission or apology?  Maybe she decides to cling to the people important to her, the same way Grace said she prioritized her children.

Something of a contrast because we’ve seen Arabella can be quite vindictive against those who wronged her or even those who commit minor offenses.

Kwame probably hasn’t had intimacy despite his prolific Grindr activities.

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It's very weird for a man to put "fun now" on his Grindr profile if he isn't looking for sex. "Fun now" is absolutely understood in that community to mean sex and not mojitos.

If someone did that in real life I would think that the guy was, on some level, getting off on not giving men what they came for.

That said, Kwame, don't just make plans with someone on Grindr without finding out exactly what they're into, and what their expectations are, and having at least a brief exchange about safety. Especially considering what you went through before.

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9 hours ago, Blakeston said:

It's very weird for a man to put "fun now" on his Grindr profile if he isn't looking for sex. "Fun now" is absolutely understood in that community to mean sex and not mojitos.

Not just the gay community - “looking for fun” on any of the apps means “no strings attached sex.” It definitely does not mean home-cooked dinner (that food looked good) and drinks. I’m glad Kwame got some real intimacy because he desperately needed it, but he’s right that the guy’s moniker was confusing.

Arabella realizing her dad wasn’t who she thought he was was sad, but I’m glad she told her mother what happened to her. Sometimes you just need to lean on the people who love you.

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Get your Brady Bunch on.

Wonder if Bella is in the throes of PTSD and depression. That could be what's causing her memory problems.

Bella's father explains a lot. Her low self-esteem for which she uses social media to "cure;" her willingness to accept poor treatment from men as just the cost of being a woman; her tendency not to "see" a problem until someone else validates it and puts it in her face.

I'm glad Kwame found someone to help him realize he'd been using the constant random sex to avoid dealing with his tamped down desire for a real, basic, human connection. That said, I hope he doesn't turn around and get overly attached to the guy.

Edited by Joimiaroxeu
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