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OnceSane

S05.E01: I Like Big Boats and I Cannot Lie

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8 hours ago, biakbiak said:

She forces the issue. Everyone was fine with lunch and than she is like “no tell me anything that anyone had a problem”, so everyone who enjoyed the fish is ignored because when pushed one person found it “gooey” and same with the “dry” steak the problem was that he wanted extra sauce which could have been accomplished easier than Sandy did by making him recooking the entire dish. 
She actively pushes the guests to nitpick even when they say they are pleased which doesn’t make for an enjoyable dining experience for anyone.

I wonder how much of that was production maybe telling Sandy that one of the guests wasn't pleased with his meal?   I get that she was probably feeling nervous after Mila last season but I can't imagine that she does this on her non-Bravo charters.  That's what the stews are there for -- tell them if something isn't right.  

Love seeing Mallorca so far.  

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1 hour ago, howiveaddict said:

I thought the portions were tiny.  Especially the first meal.  And they said they were starving.  He needs to put out lots more food, even if it’s a salad

My thought exactly, there should be a bounty of food and multiple courses. 

Sandy can now harp on the portion sizes and lack of courses.

 

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17 hours ago, TexasGal said:

I always hate to make positive judgements based on the first episode, but if Lara is going to calmly get under Hannah’s skin without actually doing anything wrong - she will be my hero.

Lara is a great addition to the show ! I love her accent & enthusiasm.

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7 minutes ago, dleighg said:

Her enthusiasm? She complained about *everything*

Ha!. I should have used a sarcasm font !

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Does the Bravo staff tell them to be disrespectful and insolent to their superiors?  Is that part of the employee orientation when you sign up for Below Deck?

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I actually am leaning more towards team Lara than team Hannah at this point. 
She’s doing the work that Hannah asks her to do. She explained the language confusion about the beer. I don’t think the “it’s not my favorite thing to do, but sure” comment at the initial meeting (about decorating the table) was such a big deal, they were getting to know each other.

meanwhile Hannah DID specifically tell her she was going to have the evening shift, and then changed it up when she decided she didn’t like her. So Lara knows it’s a punishment she’s not stupid. Hannah could have rotated the jobs on the next charter. 
Time will tell but right now it feels like Hannah is targeting her way more than is necessary.

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Riley would have nipped that sweetheart bullshit in the bud immediately. Malia, speak up. 
 

Don’t know who’s right or wrong regarding Hannah and Lara. Don’t really care. 
 

Sandy is going to create a self fulfilling prophecy with her chef being unliked by the guests. Back off a bit, girl. I kind of get her worries though. Last season was a mess. 
 

So over seeing douche men on my tv. Don’t know what his name is but throw him overboard already. 
 

June, June, Hannah.  I mean Lara, Lara, Hannah. 

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8 hours ago, dleighg said:

so that filet mignon, with the truffle risotto--

Not a single vegetable on the plate? That's just strange.

My colon cringed upon seeing that. 

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4 hours ago, psychoticstate said:

The Boston guy who said "unit" about 500 times is already on my last good nerve. 

The Unit was Pete who didn’t mention where he was from, Alex the other deckhand is from Boston.

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Pete’s awkward looking so he tried to compensate by becoming beefy except now he looks even more awkward. I love when a man’s neck is so thick it looks like his head will get swallowed into it, said no one ever. Well maybe Laaaaaara. 
 

Rob looks very heroin chic. He looks like he’s about 2 breaths away from turning full zombie.

Edited by MVFrostsMyPie · Reason: ‘Beefy’ autocorrected to ‘needy’ which isn’t completely off-track.
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I like Rob, his dad jokes literally had me laughing out loud, especially the owl one.

But I miss Colin.  Can we trade Douchebag for him?

Third stew reminds me of Megan Fox.

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On the issue of the deckhand calling Malia "sweetheart" ... this brought back a memory I have to share.

Years ago I was at a job where the supervisor liked to call everyone by a nickname. She would take their name and then create some sort of variation on it or something that rhymed with it. So David might become "D-man" or something along those lines. I can't recall all her various nicknames, only the one she used for me.

Anyway, I HATED the nickname she used for me, and I also just didn't care for being called by a nickname. So one day, I decided to do it to her. 

It took precisely two times of me calling her a nickname and she never called me by one again. 

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16 hours ago, Jack Sampson said:

And I guarantee Hannah has more pull with Bravo than Sandy.  She could probably get another captain on the show if she wanted.  There are probably dozens eager for the TV time.  I doubt she could do it with one phone call but it could be done. 

Meanwhile, if Sandy tried to fire Hannah, production would shut down until either Bravo explained to Sandy who's really in charge, or another captain was found.

What?  No way.  Pretty chief stews are a dime a dozen.  Especially ones who want to be on tv.  Female captains, I imagine, are much harder to find.  

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Pete sucks. He’s a douche and knows what he’s doing calling Malia weetheart. The scene where she was moving chairs and he tries to take over but doesn’t even do what she wanted. Also how is he 27? I don’t believe it.

Sandy basically sprints to go ask them how dinner is aka get more screen time. She ya very annoying.

Nice to see this boat tho over the annoying sailboat that seemed not that great.

Edited by Marley
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1 hour ago, Marley said:

Nice to see this boat tho over the annoying sailboat that seemed not that great.

Is it just that I "got used to" the sailboat, or is this boat REALLY big? The kitchen is rather massive! And it has both a "VIP suite" AND a "master bedroom" IIRC-- both looking really large.

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Whoever writes the scripts for these yacht shows and I do believe they are scripted to a certain degree needs to quit repeating themes. Third time for drugs on board, at least the third time for having a surley interior or deck crew member who has to have the last word when speaking with his or her superior. 

Watched a lot of the early Below Deck shows this past week. One thing that I noticed was the the chefs prepared copious amounts of food including numerous courses for lunch and dinner and snacks between meals.  What's up with the skimpy portions that seem to have started with the chef from BD last season?  Maybe they cut the food budget or decided they would rather ply them with alcohol and watch what happens when the guests get Inebriated. 

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2 hours ago, dleighg said:

Is it just that I "got used to" the sailboat, or is this boat REALLY big? The kitchen is rather massive! And it has both a "VIP suite" AND a "master bedroom" IIRC-- both looking really large.

I checked it out on line and it is really that big and beautiful! I did not see any pricing, I am very curious about how much it will cost for me to become accustomed to the lifestyle.

I had a crazy thought, who is responsible for mopping the interior floors, we never see anyone with a mop and a bucket do we?  As glamorous as the boat is the crew mess always looks so messy and dirty, who is supposed to clean that area?  Why am I so concerned about that, lol?

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18 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

My thought exactly, there should be a bounty of food and multiple courses. 

Sandy can now harp on the portion sizes and lack of courses.

 

I'd actually NOT mind seeing Sandy complain about this. 

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1 hour ago, 65mickey said:

What's up with the skimpy portions that seem to have started with the chef from BD last season? 

I think you mean that fucking wanker POS Kevin?

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12 hours ago, OnceSane said:

No spoilers, y'all.  Take it to the spoiler thread or use the spoiler tags.

Yeah, too late.  The Hannah thread is spoiled all to hell.  As is the News thread.

Edited by SuprSuprElevated
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On 6/2/2020 at 4:27 AM, biakbiak said:

She forces the issue. Everyone was fine with lunch and than she is like “no tell me anything that anyone had a problem”, so everyone who enjoyed the fish is ignored because when pushed one person found it “gooey” and same with the “dry” steak the problem was that he wanted extra sauce which could have been accomplished easier than Sandy did by making him recook the entire dish. 
She actively pushes the guests to nitpick even when they say they are pleased which doesn’t make for an enjoyable dining experience for anyone.

Sandy is annoying as hell,  she is creating issues where none existed.  Hannah was immediatly jealous and competitive with the 2nd stew,  wasn't a surprise at all when they butted heads.

Hannah isn't even trying at this point,  just going thru the drama motions for Bravo.  Don't know if I can even hate watch this show anymore.   

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Is it me or are the crew quarters very small especially considering they are on a bigger boat? The cabins on the sailing yacht seemed to be much more spacious. Especially the bunks.

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2 minutes ago, The Ringo Kidd said:

Is it me or are the crew quarters very small especially considering they are on a bigger boat? The cabins on the sailing yacht seemed to be much more spacious. Especially the bunks.

The forward cabins seemed like the smallest they have ever had on one of the boats. I don’t even know if two people can stand in there at the same time.

And despite it being larger several of the guest cabins also seemed smaller.

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4 hours ago, jrzy said:

Sandy is annoying as hell,  she is creating issues where none existed.  Hannah was immediatly jealous and competitive with the 2nd stew,  wasn't a surprise at all when they butted heads.

Hannah isn't even trying at this point,  just going thru the drama motions for Bravo.  Don't know if I can even hate watch this show anymore.   

I didn't read it as Hannah being jealous, I thought it was just her reacting to the attitude she was being given. Lara came across as an arrogant ass who clearly doesn't think she should have to take direction from Hannah. I would bet, though, that Lara will claim it's jealousy.

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On 6/2/2020 at 9:08 AM, dleighg said:

so that filet mignon, with the truffle risotto--

Not a single vegetable on the plate? That's just strange.

My thoughts exactly. Not a very balanced meal.

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Just now getting around to watching and not done yet but...

DAMN!!! Hannah is a bitter hag! Why?!?! Cheer up! Be normal! Act like you at least 40% want to be there! If not then they can find someone else I'm sure. 

These accents are going to baffle and bewilder me this season unless I get used to them. Good thing I live in a loud house/ watch at night when kids sleep so always use captioning. 

Still can't believe a boy of around 20 yrs old doesn't know what happens when you don't use a condom🙄

To be continued after I finish watching. 

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On 6/2/2020 at 12:18 PM, dleighg said:

what a princess! She doesn't like to clean, is annoyed that her boss is deciding her schedule for her, and thinks it's too much effort to acknowledge a request. But she thinks she's god's gift to men apparently.

I can't stand Lara, she thinks she's God's gift to everybody, she seems stuck up, one of those people who looks down on everyone.  To me she looks A LOT older than what she says her age is.  She thinks her accent makes her sound sexy, no thank you.

Then she acted like she didn't understand what Hannah asked her, I'm sure she has worked with people who speak English before, so I call bullshit on that.  Lara wants to be Chief Stew and doesn't like that she's only second.  Suck it up buttercup, if she doesn't like it, leave now and never ever come back.

Edited by Neurochick
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Holy shit, how do they find the worst, most obnoxious, douchebag men for this show? Within 5 minutes of meeting Pete "the Unit" Asshat (yes, that's his surname, at least for me) - I hated him. 

WTF does "the Unit" mean?!?! Why can't he call women by their names instead of "Sweetheart"?!? Why is he so insanely gross it makes me want to punch the screen?!?! 

On a side note, why do men like this even exist? First, I find him completely physically unattractive, so I'm not understanding the vain cockiness - and personality-wise he absolutely sucks. It always amazes me that someone almost three decades old hasn't changed his ways from this toxic masculinity...

Even more depressing, without any spoilers because I skip over all the "coming this season" crap - I'm sure one woman on the yacht will be dumb enough to hook up with him. And that makes me nauseated. 

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Malia looks barely competent. Plus it doesn’t look like she can handle the physically demanding parts of the job like wrestling the jet skies into the water. The good news is she doesn’t have to do that since she is the boss. But trying to be one of the boys is a fatal mistake. She is not a boy. Recognize that and work with it.

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On 6/1/2020 at 9:48 PM, biakbiak said:

It’s was 2019 and the workplace it’s the definition of a micro aggression that would be taught in most mandatory harassment trainings.

When he called her sweetie, it really sent my hackles up.  I'm sure the boats have sexual harassment training, but I do wonder if boats have training for harassment that gets into that.  I work for a national bank and the sexual harassment training doesn't really address that specifically.  It gets into a lot, and does address micro-aggressions, but some people don't *get it* and don't think it is harassment, and think it is just "being nice." 

I had a boss who was like 75 and he would call me that, and I didn't mind because I knew he actually thought it was a kind way to address me.  Someone else did report him, but I let it slide.  I did have another boss who tried that shit and he was younger, and although I couldn't address it to his face, I went to my boss.  I hated that I had to do it, because I didn't want a "label," but I knew I had to do it.  

 

On 6/1/2020 at 9:49 PM, The Ringo Kidd said:

Malia looks totally over her head. She has to stop douche bro in his tracks when he called her sweetie.

 

 

It seems like common sense that she should stop him right there and then and say "don't call me that."  But it is actually really hard in real life.  I have been there, and it is a tightrope to walk in the office, or on a boat.

 

On 6/2/2020 at 5:03 PM, MVFrostsMyPie said:

 

Rob looks very heroin chic. He looks like he’s about 2 breaths away from turning full zombie.

This is actually helpful, as I will now think of Rob Zombie, and I will remember his name!

Now I need a mnemonic device for Pete and Alex!

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On 6/1/2020 at 4:25 PM, Peper81 said:

I don’t mind Hannah but I think that is wise.  I’d like to see a different Chief stew.  Hannah just doesn’t seem to like doing it anymore so it doesn’t make it enjoyable to watch her.

Oh wow that’s probably great news for her relationship and that she is moving on to a new chapter in her life, she mentioned that she was wanting marriage and kids.

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On 6/1/2020 at 7:30 PM, tinaw said:

Another stew that doesnt want to be a 2nd stew to give hannah a hard time. 

Dont blame hannah for not wanting to do the job anymore

I guess she’s already moved on then, should make for an interesting season.

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On 6/1/2020 at 8:53 PM, dangwoodchucks said:

Did someone shrink Hannah’s epaulet shirt, that button was barely holding on.

Those crew cabins are tiny. I would feel like I was in an MRI if I was in that top bunk. So if Hannah planned for the bosun to bunk with the chef, who was she originally going to have room with her?

I noticed right away that Hannah has put on a few pounds but not sure I noticed her shirt being snug.

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Late to the game. That is a HUGE boat. Lara is an ass. I like Hannah and Malia as a team and hope they don’t devolve into the petty fighting. Sandy’s micromanaging is worse than ever. 

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Just watched again, I loathe Hannah!

Douche tells his new boss that happens to be a woman, he’s a dad because he was “young, dumb and full of cum”. What a fucking scumbag! 🖕🏻

 

Edited by Mr. Miner
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17 hours ago, endure said:

I noticed right away that Hannah has put on a few pounds but not sure I noticed her shirt being snug.

Two things are much larger this year.

The boat and Hannah’s butt.

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21 hours ago, tvfanatic13 said:

Late to the game. That is a HUGE boat. Lara is an ass. I like Hannah and Malia as a team and hope they don’t devolve into the petty fighting. Sandy’s micromanaging is worse than ever. 

  Captain Sandy's micromanaging is gonna be  really frustrating to watch. I wish she would just let people do their job. Its not gonna make for good television

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On 6/4/2020 at 4:08 PM, AryasMum said:

I can’t be the only one who sees Screech every time the camera’s on Pete. 

I KNEW Pete reminded me of someone! Thanks.

Edited by luvthepros
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23 hours ago, endure said:

I noticed right away that Hannah has put on a few pounds but not sure I noticed her shirt being snug.

I noticed that right away and so did my husband.

6 hours ago, The Ringo Kidd said:

Two things are much larger this year.

The boat and Hannah’s butt.

Make that three things!

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Re: the filet mignon.... it’s expensive, but because it doesn’t have much fat, it can be dry.  Real gourmands would Have requested a ribeye or a New York strip.  And to really go over the top...the Wagyu version of either.

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On 6/2/2020 at 8:06 AM, Jsage said:

I agree that Malia is not starting off well. She's very focused on wanting the deck crew to treat her like one of the boys. That was all well and good when she was just a deckhand. But now that she's bosun, she needs to focus way more on getting them to treat her like a superior. Not addressing the "sweetheart" comment immediately was a big mistake.

 

 

 

 

Absolutely!  That was a line that needed to be drawn immediately.   I understand wanting to be liked, and wanting everyone to get along, but she should not have let it go even once.  Right from the start, the crew should know that she must be treated with respect.   She didn't do herself or any of them any favors when she didn't tell him the very first time that it's not appropriate.  A good crew needs a respected leader, and if she doesn't step up and assert herself, the fallout will be her own fault.

She could have said it in a friendly but firm manner.  Or she could have spoken to him privately afterward.  But letting it go - repeatedly - shows poor management skills.  I like her and I want her to do well, but I was really disappointed she didn't say a word to him when clearly it was an issue.  

Edited by DebbieM4
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16 hours ago, Neurochick said:

Is it a bad thing for Hannah's behind to be larger?  A lot of men like women with larger behinds. 

Oh don’t get me wrong. I love a woman with a cushion for some pushin’

It was just a joke playing off the title of this episode. 

 

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