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S04.E18: Strangers: Part Two

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One that doesn't play out in the grand "Jack and Rebecca Pearson Love Story For The Ages" way he has romanticized in his head.

It's unfortunate that Kevin never knew that Jack and Rebecca Pearson Love Story left out a  lot of details. We've seen the beginning and they weren't all that romantic. It's hard to live up to perfection that was never there.

Jack may have wanted the best for his kids and always like to spin the fantasy, but being honest about how things really are can help to avoid giving kids unrealistic expectations. 

That was a real breakthrough moment when Kevin decided to stop trying to chase the fantasy of his parent's instant magical relationship and focus on building a real relationship. 

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On 3/24/2020 at 10:14 PM, greekmom said:

I don't think it was the location of the trial but the fact that a) it's 9 months and b) it's a long shot.

 

I think the location was the major factor.  Rebecca wanted to spend whatever quality time she had left with her family, not far away from them for such a long time.  At the end of 9 months she could deteriorate significantly.  My understanding was that she didn't want to take a chance on wasting that precious time.  

There is no family in St. Louis, or anywhere even close to being near.  I'm sure it looked to her as though she'd be leaving everything she loved, possibly (at least the way her brain would process it) forever.  She wanted to hang onto what she had, and not walk away from it for such a long time.  A lot can happen in 9 months, and I think she wanted to be with her family while she was at her best, not wasting that precious time so far away for so long.

Edited by DebbieM4
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I read through this thread before watching the episode so after reading all the comments I was interested to see what the Randall/Kevin fight was like.

What I saw was Kevin confronting Randall and then Randall immediately going for the jugular, telling Kevin that his worst fears are true. Kevin's retaliation was right but I'm not going to blame him for reacting to what Randall said.

They both can use therapy. But Randall needs it badly.

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On 3/28/2020 at 8:53 PM, Alice Mudgarden said:

Personally, I'd like Kevin to meet someone entirely new and have that be his great love story. One that doesn't play out in the grand "Jack and Rebecca Pearson Love Story For The Ages" way he has romanticized in his head. Someone he didn't see coming, without ties to anyone but him; who snuck up on him after building just a regular old friendship.

Considering what a romantic he is, I think the most romantic thing would be for him to find his love when he wasn't looking for it. Then he'd know it was for real.

Like having surprise twins with Madison. 🙂   

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5 hours ago, cardigirl said:

Like having surprise twins with Madison. 🙂   

Haha not what I meant, though I suspect you knew that 😉

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On 3/25/2020 at 10:11 PM, Bulldog said:

I have several family members who have adopted (admittedly, many years ago) and the health of prospective parents was absolutely something that agencies looked at when placing a child.  I know "fat shaming" is supposed to be taboo these days, but I don'consider Kate to be the picture of health. 

This is exactly right.  Any person (w/o fertility issues between mom and dad) and crank out a kid whether they should be a parent or not; when you adopt, everything about you comes into play to give that kid the best chance.  That's not to say terrible people don't adopt -- we've heard the terrible stories.  But you at least have to go through a pretty intense screening process where your healthy is 100% an issue.

The character, and the actress that plays her, is absolutely morbidly obese.  Not plump.  She is probably at least 300 pounds if not more.  You tend to gain weight as you age, so she could end up even heavier if she doesn't address this now.  If she doesn't have Type II diabetes and heart disease, it's probably miraculous.  

It's hard enough to take care of yourself if you carry that much weight on a small frame, much less take care of an infant/toddler AND adopt another child.

So yes, her weight would most definitely be an issue in an adoption.  And it HAS been an issue in real life adoptions.  This is not fat-shaming, it's a health issue.

 

Edited by sasha206
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On 3/26/2020 at 2:49 PM, Ohiopirate02 said:

And also, third, Alzheimer's is not something that has a cure.  Even if this drug works, it will only prolong Rebecca's good times.  He cannot save her from this diagnosis.

Exactly. I don't think Randall's idea is for Rebecca to do the trial to prolong those good times. I think Randall really believes that he can save her life.

In his delusional fantasy "If Jack Pearson Had Lived" that he told his therapist, he basically saved everyone. Not only did he keep Jack from going back into the burning house, but a few years later when William mentions his stomach bothering him, is it IBS? Or something he ate didn't agree with him? Or maybe it's just plain old gas? No, intuitive Randall knows that something sinister is afoot! He is able to get William into a specialist immediately, catching the cancer early enough that William can be treated and live.

Then older Rebecca misplaces her phone a couple of times. Is she just getting forgetful in her old age? No, alarm bells go off in Randall's head. Because nobody knows Rebecca like Randall does, not even her still-alive-husband! Randall gives Still-Alive-Jack a look that tells him something is terribly wrong, and they'd better get Rebecca to a specialist stat! Even the therapist could see that the story was going toward Randall catching the problem early, getting Rebecca treatment, and saving her.

I think Randall even mentioned a few times, both to his siblings and to Rebecca, that this trial could save her life. It's unfair to literally everyone else in the family, on so many different levels, that Randall has convinced Rebecca to go through the trial so that he can try to fix something that is unfixable.

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I kept waiting for someone to tell Randall this isn't a life or death issue; it's just a quality of life issue.  Her sadness every time she looked at him at Jack's party just broke my heart.  He could see her reaction, too, so I was just flummoxed that he didn't come to the realization that he shouldn't force her to go, especially when even Beth called him on it.  The whole storyline is just sad.

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On 3/27/2020 at 12:50 PM, DoubleUTeeEff said:

I think there are very real and valid criticisms of Kate. She is self-centered in my opinion. She is also a food addict but rather than speaking about that, she's criticized for her looks. It's like the fact that she isn't attractive enough is more important than the fact that she's battling an addiction.

In fairness, I'm almost certain that if this show featured a man of a weight similar to Kate (and even "fat" Toby was nowhere near Kate), there would be plenty of discussion on this board and others about his looks.  And I'm equally certain that they would not at all be of a sympathetic nature. 

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8 hours ago, Crs97 said:

I kept waiting for someone to tell Randall this isn't a life or death issue; it's just a quality of life issue.  Her sadness every time she looked at him at Jack's party just broke my heart.  He could see her reaction, too, so I was just flummoxed that he didn't come to the realization that he shouldn't force her to go, especially when even Beth called him on it.  The whole storyline is just sad.

Randall has now taken his control freak tendencies to a whole new level.

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On a completely different note, only Randall and Beth could set the house alarm for 30 seconds and then launch into a detailed discussion on some subject.  I replayed that sequence and timed it.  They got out the door in 45 seconds.  That will not work, trust me on that.

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I wondered about that, Dowel!  I hate things like that which are just so easy to get right.  Why didn’t they just say they had 45 seconds or a minute to get out?  Feels lazy.

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5 hours ago, CrystalBlue said:

Randall has now taken his control freak tendencies to a whole new level.

Of course in his head space that looks differently. He could not save Jack and he could not save William but he'll be damned if he can't save Rebecca no matter how many bridges he has to burn in doing so. Unless that tunnel vision gets shattered he won't see what everybody else is seeing. 

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18 hours ago, shoovenbooty said:

Exactly. I don't think Randall's idea is for Rebecca to do the trial to prolong those good times. I think Randall really believes that he can save her life.

 

18 hours ago, shoovenbooty said:

I think Randall even mentioned a few times, both to his siblings and to Rebecca, that this trial could save her life. It's unfair to literally everyone else in the family, on so many different levels, that Randall has convinced Rebecca to go through the trial so that he can try to fix something that is unfixable.

 

16 hours ago, Crs97 said:

I kept waiting for someone to tell Randall this isn't a life or death issue; it's just a quality of life issue.  Her sadness every time she looked at him at Jack's party just broke my heart.  He could see her reaction, too, so I was just flummoxed that he didn't come to the realization that he shouldn't force her to go, especially when even Beth called him on it.  The whole storyline is just sad.

 

1 hour ago, MissLucas said:

Of course in his head space that looks differently. He could not save Jack and he could not save William but he'll be damned if he can't save Rebecca no matter how many bridges he has to burn in doing so. Unless that tunnel vision gets shattered he won't see what everybody else is seeing. 

From what I read somewhere the new season will start with Rebecca and Miguel in St. Louis. We know that by August Rebecca is no longer in St. Louis.  Watching Randall get his way (and for me no matter his motivation this is him getting his way) is very difficult to watch.  He might say he is doing this because he thinks it's best for Rebecca but IMO this boils down to him wanting her to do what he wants.  And he used emotional blackmail to do it.  He is disregarding her wishes. Basically told Kevin he had no right to have an opinion on the matter. Doesn't even think about what Miguel and Kate think.  

I have no problem watching shows that are heartbreaking or deal with serious matters but this storyline is just so uncomfortable to watch.  I am used to watching characters that I know are villains (too many soap operas to name) or characters that have done bad things but sympathize with (Breaking Bad's Walter White) but Randall's behavior was just so awful.  To put his needs above his sick mother's (and the rest of her family) is something I expect to see from someone we already know to be a horrible human being.

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On 3/27/2020 at 12:50 PM, DoubleUTeeEff said:

Ory real and valid criticisms of Kate. She is self-centered in my opinion. She is also a food addict but rather than speaking about that, she's criticized for her looks. It's like the fact that she isn't attractive enough is more important than the fact that she's battling an addiction.

T

 

Hmmmm, I must be missing Kate being criticized for her looks as though she's not attractive?  I think most people think like I do -- the actress is absolutely beautiful. 

I've seen more people concerned that she's obese, or as you say "battling an addiction."  

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On 4/2/2020 at 4:39 AM, Crs97 said:

I wondered about that, Dowel!  I hate things like that which are just so easy to get right.  Why didn’t they just say they had 45 seconds or a minute to get out?  Feels lazy.

Because the alarms are set to give 30 seconds by default and that's what most people go with, if there is a way to adjust the settings at all.  Good catch Dowel; I immediately thought the speecifying went beyond the 30-seconds time frame too!

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Just caught up-I love that Hailey works at an art gallery! Seems like a natural career for a sibling to a blind person. She probably has a lot of experience describing visual media to her brother and maybe fell in love with that.

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I wonder if Tess becoming social worker has less to do with Déjà and more to do with Hailey. I would like to see Annie and Tess interact more with Aunt Kate anyways.

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On 4/12/2020 at 11:31 PM, TheGourmez said:

Just caught up-I love that Hailey works at an art gallery! Seems like a natural career for a sibling to a blind person. She probably has a lot of experience describing visual media to her brother and maybe fell in love with that.

I didn’t think of that until you mention it, but I most certainly agree!

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On 4/14/2020 at 11:29 PM, memememe76 said:

I wonder if Tess becoming social worker has less to do with Déjà and more to do with Hailey. I would like to see Annie and Tess interact more with Aunt Kate anyways.

That's an interesting point, but Kate lives on the other side of the country, so it isn't like Tess gets to see Aunt Kate too often.  Her experience with adoption would directly come from Deja joining the Pearson household.

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You know what Kevin and Randall both said fucked up things during their fight but the difference was Kevin had the decency to feel badly immediately. It was all over his face. Randall is on his high horse and didn’t think he did anything wrong. He couldn’t even be a man from the start and admit what he did. I’m so over him. 
I like Madison. I always felt she was a much better friend than Kate deserved. 

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On 3/26/2020 at 10:03 PM, txhorns79 said:

In addition, of the three of them, if I had to trust my future well being to one of them, I'd sure as hell choose Randall. Because he's always shown up. 

I wouldn’t.  Randall is a good man, no question.  But he has shown that he holds a lot of resentment for always showing up.  He did it out of obligation and now feels like everyone owes him.  I think this was proven by the way he guilted Rebecca into the trial.  If you want to be there for someone, do so openly and without expectations.  No one appointed him the family caretaker, he chose that role for himself.

Also, Kevin may have been a dick in the past but we have also seen times when he was there for Randall.  I really haven’t seen Randall do that in return.

I had a lot of infertility problems and had my one and only miracle baby two years ago, so I related to Madison.  I’m glad she is getting her miracle.  I think Kevin will be a good dad.  I really don’t care if they get married, stay together, get divorced, etc.  I’m just glad they are getting their chance to be parents and I think they will both be good at it.  

Older Kevin was hot!!

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