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S08.E14: Everyother Day Mom

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Catelynn, Maci and Cheyenne visit Amber to support her first court hearing. Maci lets Bentley go golfing with Ryan, while Cory tells Cheyenne her priorities are not on Ryder. Mackenzie throws a birthday party for Gannon.

Airs March 17, 2020 at 9:01 PM

Does MTV spell things wrong on purpose?

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I don't know if they aired this episode last week, because now it's listed as "New" for this week.

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I’ll have more to comment on tomorrow, since I don’t think I’m doing anything 😀, but how are Catelynn, Maci and Cheyenne dumb enough to go on TV and act like attacking your fiancé with a machete when he has your child in his arms is something that passively happens to a person?

Seriously, did anyone have any idea what the fuck Caitlynn’s doctor was talking about when she kept referring to the “family medicine” that Caitlynn would need years(!) to get off?  Was that some kind of therapy-speak for “medicine your family doctor prescribed that he had no business prescribing, because I out-doctor him”?  Because that’s some BS. I’ve been on Zoloft, it didn’t work, I stopped taking it, and I didn’t have one side effect.  I think this is more absolving of personal responsibility (see Amber, above).

This is the order of personal responsibility I think they take, from worst to best:

  1. Amber
  2. Caitlynn
  3. Cheyenne
  4. Maci
  5. Mackenzie

I’ll be back tomorrow to talk about the illegal drugs I think Ryan and Josh are definitely on.

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20 minutes ago, LibertarianSlut said:

I’ll have more to comment on tomorrow, since I don’t think I’m doing anything 😀, but how are Catelynn, Maci and Cheyenne dumb enough to go on TV and act like attacking your fiancé with a machete when he has your child in his arms is something that passively happens to a person?

Seriously, did anyone have any idea what the fuck Caitlynn’s doctor was talking about when she kept referring to the “family medicine” that Caitlynn would need years(!) to get off?  Was that some kind of therapy-speak for “medicine your family doctor prescribed that he had no business prescribing, because I out-doctor him”?  Because that’s some BS. I’ve been on Zoloft, it didn’t work, I stopped taking it, and I didn’t have one side effect.  I think this is more absolving of personal responsibility (see Amber, above).

I think she was saying “family of medication,” so she wouldn’t get into trouble for talking shit about a name brand.  I believe there are types of meds and they are referred to as “family of.”  
And I was on Zoloft, and when I went off I had a hellish time with the same stuff she mentioned.  I didn’t taper, stupidly, and it was really hard.

Edited by heatherchandler
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^^^ 

Ah, that makes sense!  I feel a little foolish now.  Maybe I was distracted that this doctor looked exactly what it would be like if House’s Dr. Lisa Cutty and Dr. Phil’s wife, Robin, had a baby.  😂

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When Andrew said he wants as much as the rest of the people on the show, I certainly hope he wasn't shooting for the main girls' salaries.   He can't be that stupid, can he?  If so, he has an overinflated opinion of his importance on the show.  People don't even like watching Amber.  

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Why did Ryan get such a thrill over making Bentley mad when they were golfing? He was bragging about it!  

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50 minutes ago, Quilty said:

Why did Ryan get such a thrill over making Bentley mad when they were golfing? He was bragging about it!  

I know, right?  From what we saw, he barely spoke to his son when they arrived at the golf course.  It looked so tense!!  Ryan is such an ass!  Bentley could probably beat Ryan's golf score even with one hand tied behind his back! 

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9 hours ago, eskimo said:

When Andrew said he wants as much as the rest of the people on the show, I certainly hope he wasn't shooting for the main girls' salaries.   He can't be that stupid, can he?  If so, he has an overinflated opinion of his importance on the show.  People don't even like watching Amber.  

He probably is. I mean I can’t blame the guy from trying but he’s an idiot if he thinks he’s that important. 

2 hours ago, Quilty said:

Why did Ryan get such a thrill over making Bentley mad when they were golfing? He was bragging about it!  

Because he sees Bentley has a little brother and not a son. 

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This episode was kind of blah.

 

Catelynn: Stop leaving Tyler! Your children and husband deserve someone who is present.

 

Amber: Blah, blah, blah. She should've been fired when she hit Gary.

 

Cheyenne: How is going to  Indiana for Ryder?

 

Maci: Ryan will never be a father to Bentley. 

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And I almost forget that McKenzie is on the show. Did she only stay with Josh to have kids?  These girls thinking they need the perfect family is getting old. 

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Ryan is so dumb. Taking your son golfing with your wife and parents is not spending “one on one” time with him. He barely talked to him other than making sure Bentley knew that he was winning. Then they go out to eat after and don’t take him along? Fun day for Benny. 

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Not to state the obvious, but Amber doesn’t care about kid she has that she’s allowed to see (Lia).  She was crying that if she lost the court hearing, she would go from “every day mom to every other day mom” to James (dissolves into tears).  She’s not even an “every other day mom” with Lia!

Catelynn and Cheyenne have most annoying voices In completely different ways.  I hate when they yell their voiceovers.  Amber is a big offender there.

Rhine still seems fucked up. Such weird energy with Bentley, as was commented upon. 

Josh sucks. What in the world could have been more important than his son’s eighth birthday party?  Sad.

Cori’s right: he and Cheyenne should be on the same parenting page, precisely so that one parent isn’t “the bad guy.” Did he really say they should “try” to keep Ryder’s bedtime to 9 o’clock, as in 9 pm?  So she usually goes to bed later than that?  I thought kids that age went to bed at 7:30.  I don’t think my bedtime was 9 o’clock until I was eight.

I still think Catelynn’s doctor was being too easy on her. I’m sure she’s on a shit-ton of medication, but I’ve never heard of anything taking more than months to kick.  Once people start talking in terms of years, a short-term stay at an in-patient rehab is usually recommended.  Oh wait, Catelynn would never leave her family for any significant period of time 🤔...the fact that the doctor and the patient kept referring to postpartum depression as “postpartum” (which is anything that happens after giving birth, good, bad or indifferent) made me weep for the English language.  

Mackenzie was actually showing a ton of self-awareness that Josh doesn’t love her, which makes it so she has no love to give (back).  I think it’s time to call this one.

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I was totally disgusted with Ryan's behavior last night. What kind of a man/father purposely goes out of his way to not only beat his kid at a a golf game, a kid who is what 8/9? and then rub it in and mock him? and what kind of a woman sits at a restaurant with her lame ass husband and laughs and giggles at how her husband humiliated her stepson? And Ryan's parents just sit there and shush Bentley and of course allow Ryan to be the shit head he is. Then...at the restaurant where they went without Bentley, of course, after the golf outing, Ryan whined again about not being able to have Bentley without his parents hanging around and griped about Bentley's baseball. Gee Ryan, do you ever take ownership of what you did that put the restraining order in place? He sees himself as a victim and Maci will always be the perpetuator of everything wrong in his life...and he has a spouse that enables him as well as useless parents...especially his mommy. In a few years Bentley will not want to be with Ryan at all...when he turns 18 he will tell him to shove it and have as little contact with him as possible. And BTW...he's still using....it's obvious.

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Bentley seems like such a sweet kid . I feel so bad for him that he probably has a nice life with Maci and family , but he has no other choice but to see Ryan . You can see on his face that he resents him already , but is too respectful to talk back to him . 
 

Why does literally everyone in Ambers life kiss her ass ? What she did was disgraceful and somehow they think the boyfriend is the sociopath ( which he probably is , but you ain’t far off , Amb ) . No one , including the hosts at the reunion ever tell her that she’s responsible for her behavior . 

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5 minutes ago, Jaclyn88 said:

Bentley seems like such a sweet kid . I feel so bad for him that he probably has a nice life with Maci and family , but he has no other choice but to see Ryan . You can see on his face that he resents him already , but is too respectful to talk back to him . 
 

Why does literally everyone in Ambers life kiss her ass ? What she did was disgraceful and somehow they think the boyfriend is the sociopath ( which he probably is , but you ain’t far off , Amb ) . No one , including the hosts at the reunion ever tell her that she’s responsible for her behavior . 

Amber is the sociopath and bully. Andrew does not fit the criteria for it but rather he appears to be socially awkward and maybe an opportunist. We have seen how Amber manipulates her family and the other TMs into feeling sorry for her and blaming everyone else for her addictions, bully behavior and physical abuse of boyfriends. She and Caitlin continue to blame "post partum" for all their terrible choices and in Amber's case, her verbal and physical violence of her partners. Amber is a bully and a liar. Why MTV continues to support her and pay her for this is beyond me. Fake crying, blaming everyone else for everything wrong in her life and pretending to be a caring, loving mom is just a farce and an insult to our intelligence. You can see how Leah does not want to be with her anymore and James has no bond with her at all because she never had much to do with him...looked like Andrew did everything in the baby care department when they were together. All she did was sit on the sofa or bed and whine, complain and verbally abuse all those around her. Appalling that she had the audacity to claim that she "works" and and has "worked so hard"...she has never had a job in her life, much like the most of these girls on this show. But by all means MTV, keep enabling this bullshit.

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Amber has a typical criminal attitude. Why is all this happening to me? No accountability and Mtv backs it up. She's a domestic abuser, full stop. We've actually seen her do it on camera. This show is fooling no one.

Cori came at Cheyenne a little too hard even if he has a point. He sounded like her boss and he had to have known that was going to go over like a lead balloon. Nobody wants to hear you think they're parenting is sub par. He needs to sell it to her as a co parent with a little finesse.

When Mackenzie said Josh isn't her person, he makes her feel like shit and he never loved her that's pretty much the end of the line and time to call a divorce lawyer. Why'd she have so many kids with him? It's a mystery only Mackenzie's vagina knows.

 

 

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If Andrew had attacked Amber's locked door with a machete while their child was in her arms, would MTV have orchestrated a big show of support for him?  Hell no.

Did Maci actually call Andrew a narcisist?  None of those TMs should ever be allowed to use that word unless they're referring to themselves.

Amber worked SO HARD for everything Andrew's trying to take from her.  Bwah!

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How can anyone take Cory seriously with the two perfect tendrils of hair always in place?  His new girlfriend/baby momma is dumb as a box of rocks too.

Half of me thinks that the girls showed u to support Amber just to stay on her good side.  They know she's crazy.  Ooh, not to mention the additional screen time.

 

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1 hour ago, snarts said:

the girls showed u to support Amber just to stay on her good side.  They know she's crazy.  Ooh, not to mention the additional screen time.

 

I do think people kiss her ass because she's got a borderline personality disorder and she will MAKE YOU PAY if you cross her. Just easier to go along to get along.

But I think they went there because MTV made them.

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1 hour ago, lilmarysunshine said:

I do think people kiss her ass because she's got a borderline personality disorder and she will MAKE YOU PAY if you cross her. Just easier to go along to get along.

But I think they went there because MTV made them.

I feel so bad for Gary and his family. They’re tied to this repulsive oxygen thief until Leah is an adult and out on her own.

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I'm kind of loving that Mackenzie is completely over Josh.

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13 hours ago, Mr. Miner said:

I feel so bad for Gary and his family. They’re tied to this repulsive oxygen thief until Leah is an adult and out on her own.

It will really be longer than that, more like forever.  Example:  Leah is a in her 20's and Amber is causing her problems or Amber is homeless; Leah will turn to Gary for support.

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2 hours ago, MaggieG said:

I'm kind of loving that Mackenzie is completely over Josh.

She is a horrible mother.  When she hit her son with the towel and it hit his eye, she didn't even apologize.  I think she abuses him when no cameras are around.

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2 hours ago, jumper sage said:

She is a horrible mother.  When she hit her son with the towel and it hit his eye, she didn't even apologize.  I think she abuses him when no cameras are around.

Every time I hear her say "Gannon," I think of that poor boy Gannon who was murdered. 

She really did whip that towel into his eye without thinking.  If I did that, my kids would be confused and say something like, "why did you hit me?"  but Gannon seemed to accept it as something that is normal.

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Though I don’t agree with the passive way that Cheyenne parents Ryder, Corie can take a seat with his acting like he’s the authority on raising children. I’m pretty sure he only shows up to be a father to her when the cameras are there.  He’s been on multiple “ Challenges” where he’s away for months and spends a lot of time on social media.  Yes, they should be united in their parenting rules, but Cheyenne is doing the majority of it so he can shut it.

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On 3/25/2020 at 5:46 PM, snarts said:

How can anyone take Cory seriously with the two perfect tendrils of hair always in place?  His new girlfriend/baby momma is dumb as a box of rocks too.

Half of me thinks that the girls showed u to support Amber just to stay on her good side.  They know she's crazy.  Ooh, not to mention the additional screen time.

 

I think they went because it’s an opportunity to leave kids.

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Hi-dee-ho, trash TV lovers! It’s time to gather up them Ooopsie Babies and settle down deep into your sofa (a la Amber Portwood) to watch our five heroines make more bad life decisions, go on more vacations and get into more fights with their assorted baby daddies!

And….luckily for us, MTV was there to document it all!

This is a Very Special Episode of the show because it brings all the girls together all the girls together except Mackenzie in several scenes. (Poor Mack has been discarded from the group like Butch‘s cut-off rattail, apparently.) 

We kick things off in Michigan, where Catelynn and Tyler have just returned from their blindfold-filled, spontaneous luxury vacation to Hawaii. Cate says that the trip helped them “get into a good place” (so…basically…they banged). However, Cate’s made-for-TV pal Amber is not in a good place, due to her upcoming court hearing, so Catelynn reaches out to her to check in.

Cate had intended to just toss out the ambiguous “let me know if you need anything” to Amber and then not doing anything…but Amber— forever needy— has other plans. She tells Cate that she really needs the support of her ‘Teen Mom’ cast members at her upcoming hearing. Of course, Catelynn has no problem jumping on a plane for yet another spontaneous trip, and tells Amber she’ll be there.

Tyler does not seem thrilled that he’ll be on double crotch-goblin duty while Catelynn “supports” Amber in Indiana. 

“I’ve got to get me some felon friends with court dates so I can score some kid-free vacations, too!”

Ty brings up the fact that court dates and abuse charges are old-hat for Amber, but Catelynn argues that “Amber doesn’t usually ask for help.”

UM….?!?!?

Catelynn calls up Maci to see if she, too, got roped into going to this courthouse circus performance, and Maci confirms that she has. 

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Cheyenne has also been recruited to drop everything and sprint over to Indiana to sit in a courtroom for Amber. Cory will be watching Ryder while Cheyenne’s away. Cory has apparently turned into Dr. Spock in Cornrows since the last episode, and is schooling Cheyenne on all things parenting, and pointing out all the crap she’s doing wrong with their kid. 

“I don’t like to brag but….oh, wait…yes I do!”

(Cory better watch his mouth or Chey may come back from Indiana with Amber’s “Mother Goddess” sword and start swinging!) 

A few days later, Cheyenne, Catelynn and Maci have all arrived in Indiana to “support” Amber. They load up into a car and talk about how they’ve only heard one side of what the hell went down that night at Amber’s Lil’ House ‘o’ Holiday Horrors. The “side” they’ve gotten, they say, is the media’s side, not Amber’s or even Andrew’s. They say even if Amber did, in fact, try to go all “Michael Myers” on her boooooyfriend that night, she still deserves their love and support. 

“I’m scared y’all! I think I just wet my Things That Matter sweats a lil…”

They roll up to a house where Amber is standing outside waiting, suitcase in hand. Amber is thrilled to see the girls, greeting them with a hug before jumping into their car. 

Amber says that the situation is “killing” her but Maci reminds her that she’s way too tough for a little domestic violence abuse case to kill her. Amber says she didn’t sleep for five days after she was sprung from the clink, due to her confusion.

“It’s nice to see women who are not in orange jumpsuits for once!”

Amber said that Andrew had been acting weird “for quite some time” and that she had found out things through lawyers and bank statement sleuthing and whatnot which made her concerned.

The girls pump Amber to spill the details on what went down that night with Andrew, but Amber says she can’t talk about it. She does mention that her daughter Leah is really worried for her right now, though.

Cheyenne suggests that they all scream into the camera…for some reason. Amber agrees and soon they’re all shrieking like Gary if someone had dropped some Ben & Jerry’s on his beloved Lazy Boy chair.

This is also what would happen if the girls were told they had to get real, 9-to-5 jobs…

The next day is Amber’s hearing. The entire circus train— the ‘Teen Mom’ girls, Gary and Kristina, the ‘Teen Mom’ producers and a camera crew— all head to the courthouse to “support” Amber. Andrew has also arrived at the courthouse, but he is apparently not feeling very “chatty” and ignores the cameras. He also walks right past Amber and the OG crew without even looking at them, which pisses Amber off. 

The gang prays to the the Jesus God Leah that Amber will get to see James again, and then they all head into the courtroom. Unfortunately, the judge isn’t cool with MTV cameras, so we have to see what played out in there via some very creepy court drawings. 

Whoever drew this did Cheyenne dirty…

Amber tells us that the protective order forbiding her from seeing her son James has been lifted…but….she’s been issued a gag order so she is not allowed to discuss the case with anyone, including a ‘Teen Mom’ film crew! GULP!

Once inside the car, Amber says she’s surprised that Andrew had no emotion toward her.

“Narcissist!” Maci proclaims.

Later, Gary (snuggled into his trusty Lazy Boy chair) discusses the court hearing with Kristina. Gary says he’s supporting Amber only because she “doesn’t deserve everything this guy’s trying to do.” He still believes Amber is a good person, despite her fist-swinging and machete-pulling ways.

Back at Amber’s, she’s telling the girls that she can’t give men chances anymore because they always screw her over.

She says it’s been hard to go from being an every day mom to being an “every other day mom.”

Um…? 

“Every other day mom, huh? That doesn’t sound too bad, actually…”

Amber starts to cry because she believes everyone is looking at her “like she’s a piece of s**t.” 

The next day, Producer Larry and Producer David ring up ol’ Andy to see if he would like to tell his side of The Great Machete Caper…in front of rolling MTV cameras, natch. Andrew agrees, and the guys trek over there to talk to him. We only hear the audio part of the conversation going on inside the house.

“We never, ever air just a one-sided story,” Larry says. “We just don’t.”

Um…..?

“So is this a new thing we’re trying, Larry, or…?”

“It’s not my job to get her mentally stable,” Andrew says of Amber. “I can’t do it anymore.”

Big Andy makes it clear that if they want to capture this Kodak moment on their cameras, it’s gonna cost them. They then flash a message on the screen that Andrew has chosen not to share his story. (You can click here to read The Ashley’s recent interview with Andrew to get his actual side of what went down on the day that MTV came a’knockin’!) 

Back in Tennessee, Taylor is hanging out with the assorted Oopsie Babies while Maci is away “helping” Amber. Jayde is trying her hand at stand-up comedy this episode. 

“If you think this is funny, wait until you see Benny’s dad try to be a parent in the next scene… “

Meanwhile, Bentley is subjected to a day of family fun on the golf course with the Edwards crew. The outing gets off to a very on-brand start when Ryan shows some jealously over the new golf gear that his parents purchased for Bentley. 

Um…why does Ryan look like he’s Bentley’s grandfather? What the hell!?

After the group loads into their respective golf carts, it’s not long before Ryan is picking a fight with Bentley over the golf score and fist-bumping his wife Mackenzie along the way. 

Ryan may look like a senior citizen, but he’s acting like a third grader. He’s bickering with his 11-year-old son about how many swings everyone took. Larry tries to get “the kids” to stop fighting but it’s no use. Bentley tells his grandparents that his dad is incorrectly calculating the score….and being mean in the process.

Bentley, how many of your biological parents are actually worth a damn:

Ryan and Mackenzie seem to be enjoying Bentley’s aggravation just a little too much… especially when Bentley makes a bad shot and they both laugh at him from the comforts of their golf cart.  Mimi Jen scolds Ryan for being a jerk.

It’s all fun and games until your occasional dad and letter-writing stepmom decide to come along on Family Fun Day….

Later on, Ryan and Mackenzie recap their golf outing over dinner. They both agree that it was nice picking on spending time with Bentley, given that he usually has baseball games “out the wazoo.” Aside from spending time with Bentley, Ryan seems to have enjoyed frustrating him even more. Though in Ryan’s defense, frustrating people is kind of his specialty. 

“Dang, I’m good at everything!”

A few days later, Maci returns from her trip and Taylor wants to know how Amber is doing. He says it’s good that Maci and the others were there to support Amber as a friend and sister in teenage pregnancy fame.

Maci says as Amber’s friend, she feels helpless and calls the ordeal “a freakin’ mess.” Taylor manages to point out one positive in Amber’s life — her co-parenting situation with Gary and Kristina, noting that it would be a nice place for them to get to with Ryan and Mackenzie.

“We’re a ways away from that kind of co-parenting relationship,” he tells Maci. 

“Maybe we could all bond over a friendly game of golf?”

“Yeah, I mean considering they have one and we don’t,” she replies. “They have a decent one at that.” 

Over in Michigan, Tyler is hanging out with a random, dentally challenged friend on the porch. He tells his pal how “dope” it was that Catelynn surprised him by taking him to Maui, since he’s usually the one who has to do the romancing. 

“I seen that Hawaii on my Meema’s TV picture box once. It looks real purdy!”

Tyler says he’s thrilled that Catelynn is doing better these days, given what a complete diarrhea stain of a life she’s had, what with the unexpected pregnancy and adoption with Carly, April‘s substance abuse problems and that whole marrying-Butch thing, and her own mental health issues. 

“Cate, she don’t know how to deal with stuff,” Tyler proclaims. 

He adds that, as soon as Cate is home from “helping Amber,” she plans to go down to her psychiatrist to talk about getting off some of her meds. 

A few days later, Catelynn is back from “supporting Amber,” so she scurries on down to see her psychiatrist. Cate’s psychiatrist confirms with Cate that her mood is at a 10, but she fails to acknowledge her outfit, which, thanks in large part to her ’Teen Mom OG’ hoodie, is also a 10. 

When you get that free MTV swag…

Cate’s psychiatrist then runs down all of the other components in Cate’s life to make sure things are good there as well, including any looming “postpartum symptoms.” Cate asks her doctor for a friendly reminder of those symptoms, aside from “being sad” and wanting to buy a truck load of therapy horses. Cate’s psychiatrist first mentions Cate’s energy level. 

“Well…this is pretty much what I do…”

She goes on to mention excessive guilt as a symptom, but Cate assures her doctor that everything is going as smoothly as her side bangs.

Cate is doing so well in fact, that she asks her doctor about her medication and the possibility of one day no longer having to take it. Cate’s doctor says if she were to go off the medication, she could have withdraw symptoms but after years of counseling, she could possibly be weened off of them. 

Later on, Cate tells Tyler all about her appointment and Tyler is very engaged. 

“Oh God, I can feel another therapy horse galloping its way to our house now… “

Tyler says if he met Cate when she was on the wrong medication, he would’ve basically run the other way. Cate says as long as her current meds are working, she has no reason to stop taking them… she just feels the need to talk about not taking them for story line purposes. 

Over in Los Angeles, Ryder is staying with Cory and Taylor while Cheyenne is in Indiana being a contractually obligated supportive co-star. After wrangling Ryder and getting her to go to sleep, Cory tells Taylor that Ryder is getting to the age where she’s going to notice the different rules at each of her parents’ houses and he doesn’t want to “be the mean dad.” 

“That would really throw a wrench in my plan to get #CoolDadCory trending on social media.”

Cory says when watching the footage and checking himself out from the previous season, he saw how out of control Ryder was with Matt and Cheyenne and how his toddler pretty much runs the show and he feels like he should talk to Cheyenne about to get some extra screen time. 

Taylor, who appears to have the personality level of a potato with a ponytail, occasionally utters “Yeah” in response to Cory’s rant. 

The next day, Cheyenne is back from Indiana and is having a pool party with her family, so Cory stops by to drop off Ryder. (Chey’s sheer thong bathing suit, which she usually wears for family outdoor gatherings, must be at the cleaner’s because she’s actually fully dressed this time.) 

“The boss has returned, everyone!”

Before leaving, Cory talks to Cheyenne about establishing a solid bedtime for Ryder and encourages her to start reading to Ryder on a regular basis. Cheyenne nods to Cory’s suggestions, which causes him to accuse her of not taking him seriously.

It would probably be easier to take you seriously, Cory, if you weren’t dressed like an adult Pugsley Addams. Just sayin’…

Cheyenne says she is taking Cory seriously; however, she feels like he just assumes she isn’t doing these things rather than asking her if she’s doing them. Cory tells Cheyenne he feels like her focus has shifted and he doesn’t know if it’s on Ryder. 

“You sound f**king stupid to say that to me,” she tells him. “You sound crazy. You sound crazy and I’m not going to take it.”

Cheyenne tells Cory that Ryder comes first and that she’s basically been doing the bulk of the parenting all on her own. She goes up one side of Cory and down the other, telling him she does all of Ryder’s classes, doctor’s appointments and scheduling, and that it’s downright disrespectful for him to tell her she’s not focused on her kid. 

“Um…I’m not the one leaving for weeks at a time to go on bad MTV reality shows…or knocking up people or whatnot, Cor!” 

Hold on to your machetes, folks! This could get dangerous….

At long last, we check in with poor Mackenzie. (‘Member her?) She wasn’t invited on the Indiana Adventure with the other girls, but it’s probably for the best, being that she’s got plenty going on in her own life. 

Mack is trying to keep all youngins alive while Josh is living away from the family home, due to his inability to keep it zipped during a frisky night at ol’ Billy Bob’s Bar & Truckstop. The kids are about to start school, so Mackenzie tromps through her daughter Jaxie’s room (stepping over the piles of assorted crap–possibly both literally and figuratively) to find a clean frock to put the kid in for the first day of school.

“It’s safe to come in, kids. Just be sure to check your shoes for raw sewage before leaving the room…”

Later that day, she meets up with her mom Angie and sister Whitney to talk about workout leggings (or something), as well as Gannon’s upcoming birthday party, which may or may not be attended by Joshy. Mackenzie says that currently, Josh’s living situation is that of Jenelle’s former booooyfriend Kieffer: he’s sleeping on random couches, in sheds and wherever the hell he can rest his cheating head.

“If only I had a trip to, say…I don’t know…INDIANA or something to look forward to!”

A few days later, the Styrofoam containers of taco-like product have arrived which means…it’s birthday party time! Josh has made an appearance, as have an assortment of kids and random animals. 

Josh only stays long enough to shovel down a few tacos before he starts to head for the door. Mackenzie confronts him and tells him he’s wrong for leaving his son’s party so early. Josh doesn’t appear to be too worried about it. He kisses his birthday youngin on his head and dashes out the front door. 

Mack goes inside and bashes Josh to her sister, and then it’s time to bring out the cake.

“Please tell me your birthday wish is that your Daddy keeps it in his pants next time he goes to Billy Bob’s!”

The next day, the youngins are running amok, shaking sodas in the living room (as you do). Mack’s trusty sis Whitney is back to talk more about the Josh situation. She says that she knows Mackenzie and Josh already had a s**tcan marriage, and Mack agrees that Josh’s cowgirl wranglin’ was the “cherry on top” of their craptastic marriage sundae. 

Mackenzie begins to cry and says Josh makes her feel ugly and that she can’t love him anymore. She also admits that she’s forced her relationship with Josh for the entire nine years they’ve been together, because she got knocked up at 16 and wanted to make things work.

She even admits that she knew Josh didn’t love her on the day they got married. 

“I hate that I married him,” she says.

She realizes that she’s been unhappy ever since she got with Josh, and that she has spent her entire young adulthood trying to pretend she was happy living with him. She says she wishes she could go back to when she was 16 and steer clear of Josh….and/or worked harder to snag a spot on a ‘Teen Mom’ show earlier…

That’s all for this episode! Yeehaw, y’all! 

 

Edited by druzy
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Amber is a sick, horrible person. But MTV is arguably worse for attempting to turn her domestic violence against her partner and son into some kind of inspiring "squad" narrative (with the "squad" being people who aren't even friends, who are barely coworkers). It was all so forced, on top of being disgusting. And I think they skipped the obligatory "If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic violence, call this number..." So does DV only count if the victim is female/the perpetrator is male? Violence toward men and baby boys is ok? Disgusting.

Also, STFU, Maci. NuMatt is a "narcissist" for not wanting to be beaten or slashed with a machete? For wanting a safe, stable home for his child? She got a restraining order against Ryan for threatening to harm Taylor, a verbal threat when he wasn't even in Taylor's presence. Imagine if he had chased Taylor with a machete. Imagine if he had done that while Taylor was carrying Maverick. And you can't even argue that Amber is a better parent than Ryan, so it's more important to keep her in James' life. She and Ryan are probably about on par as parents, except I don't think he has ever chased Bentley with a deadly weapon. I hate Maci.

 

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