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S04.E13: Chapter Seventy: The Ides of March

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Worried about what the future may hold for him after high school, Archie seeks advice from an unlikely source — Hiram Lodge. Meanwhile, Veronica begins to spiral after learning some devastating news about someone close to her. Finally, accusations made against Jughead leaves his future at Stonewall Prep hanging in the balance.

Airdate: Wednesday, February 12, 2020

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Oooo-kay!

Still thinking this has to be an elaborate setup but not quite sure what that whole final thing in the woods was--we saw Brett, Donna, and Other Two Who Hardly Speak alive and well at the party right before Jughead's skull met Betty's fugue state, so unless all four of them were performing for a hidden camera I'm not certain what's going on. 

(Also, applause to my husband, who walked in just as Archie said "Betty, what did you do?" and smooth as silk replied "I thought he was a cat!")

Serious question: can anybody at all remember why the Evil Ones at Stonewall Prep were so damn desperate to get Jughead into their precious rat's nest of a school in the first place? Was it only Mr. Chipping's idea? Because if that was true it's clear this cabal could have quashed the notion before Jug heard a whisper about it. And again, he and his family have been living here for three generations and neither he nor his dad had the slightest idea about all this Baxter Brothers nonsense at all, so why on earth do they care enough to go to this ludicrous amount of trouble to make him leave a school they could have so easily kept him out of?

Speaking of ludicrous, the entire rum thing continues to annoy hugely.  The idea of these three TEENAGERS running a liquor manufacturing/distribution business while they all presumably plan to go to college? Makes Archie's typical day look completely logical and easily handled. I assume Hiram's showing up at Archie's gym is so three months down the road he can go "for somebody with a neurodegenrative disease he sure can bench press" and Veronica realizes he lied again, so can we just fast forward to that, show? And dump the magical disappearing/reappearing daughter thing while we're at it? 

Brett continues to enrage me by not being murdered, but I will say that actor wore his Roman ensemble and laurel crown well.

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Had a nice minute long laugh when Principal Honey went on about how his priority was the students well being.  Yeah, tell that to Archie's well being when a freaking mercenary was somehow able to sneak into the school, and beat the crap out of him and Kevin for a few good minutes, until someone finally helped them out.  If protecting the students is your main goal here, Honey, you really, really suck at it.

So, someone in the writers room finally realized that Archie has been a) running the gym, b) running the construction company and c) going to school, and even for this show, that is a bit far-fetched.  The resolution seems to be that Archie will still run the gym, but after briefly considering to sell the company, he ends up just making Mr. Keller the foreman and take most of the responsibility (because, again, while he might have sucked as a sheriff, he really is the most capable adult here now that Fred is gone.)  As for school?  Well, it looks like he's just going to fail this semester and take summer classes.  Okay then!

Hermosa is back and the hilarious rum war between the mobster mayor and his high school daughter (and her kooky partners!) continues to get even messer.  Also, Hiram's sickness (?) briefly made Veronica go wild a bit, until she found out he had told Hermosa about it, so now she is determined to keep him alive by... making him, very, very angry?  Yeah, the whole thing is so ridiculous.  But, hey, it was nice seeing Camila Mendes get more material here and I do think she is doing a great job with this silly, silly material.

Looks like everything is finally coming to ahead for Jughead's "murder."  First, the Stonewall prep folks falsely accuse him of plagiarism over his initial submission to get into the school, and remove all the evidence to prove his innocence.  Jughead initially wants to burn everything down, but after Bret reveals that he does have a tape of him and Betty doing the deed, Jughead instead agrees to leave.  But wait!  Jughead now has a grand plan that involves approaching Bret at the Stonewall party, wearing one of those creepy rabbit masks.  Also, Donna claims that Evelyn (remember her?!) told her the real password to make Dark Betty go killer crazy, so that's why Betty supposedly "kills" Jughead.  I have no clue what in the hell is going on here, but I still think this is all part of Jughead's plan somehow.  I also think Archie and Veronica's little rendezvous in the woods was highly suspicious, because they both were acting weird when they both went into the woods and came back.  I suspect they were doing something else instead.  Hmm..  

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So, we finally get to That Night When Jughead "Dies" (LOL) and...I mean, it's totally obvious that he's not dead. Even more so with Jughead's whole "I got a plan, Betty." So, with Donna going to see Evelyn, I wouldn't be surprised if Jughead/Betty anticipated this and got to Evelyn first to make her a deal to lie to Donna. 

Now, the question is if Veronica and Archie are in on it. My gut says no. My gut says that Betty and Jughead wanted his "death" to be as believable as possible, so by not telling the other two, it created a more believable story. However...I don't believe that the two were really just hooking up in the woods, so they could have met up with Betty/Jughead right before they went back to the party. 

Possibility; Jughead found some new drug to slow down his heart rate and he'll be totally fine. That scene with Jughead in the morgue? What we didn't see is an extended scene where he wakes up. 

Veronica's stuff was actually really interesting...well, until she cried to Archie about her "dying" dad and then decided that her plan to save him was to...provoke him into fighting her with the rum business? Ok? It is nice to see Camila get more to do this episode, and it...was about her Daddy, but she got to play Party Girl for a few scenes, which worked.

Archie...is not going to be able to graduate with his friends, which was kind of implied for a while now but I'm surprised they followed through with it. It shouldn't be surprising since he's working two other jobs and was imprisoned and then on the run last year for a few months. 

Yeah, Principal Honey did make me laugh with the whole "I'm totally looking out for your best interests here, kids." Searching lockers for drugs and alcohol is looking out for the kids. Not keeping strange mercenaries out, though? Totally not his problem if a murder happens on school grounds. But drinking? Way over the line! 

I'm just glad we finally moved things along.

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Had a nice minute long laugh when Principal Honey went on about how his priority was the students well being.  Yeah, tell that to Archie's well being when a freaking mercenary was somehow able to sneak into the school, and beat the crap out of him and Kevin for a few good minutes, until someone finally helped them out.  If protecting the students is your main goal here, Honey, you really, really suck at it.

To be fair, though, the entire town apparently has a rich history of letting students and mercenaries/serial killers/whack jobs dressed as Demon Kings run riot through their various institutions of higher learning at will, though. It's not like whoever is ostensibly principal of Stonewall is worth a damn, and remember when Weatherbee let that drug running psycho kid hang Fangs upside down off a balcony? Neither of them were so smug about their absolute failure in their administrative roles, though.

Just thought of something: the timing, along with everything else about this latest plagiarism crap fest, is ridiculous. What's his butt claims that he wrote On Featherless Wings two months ago, right? Exactly how did Jughead steal it, then? He and everybody else in town apparently didn't know this snobby ass school within walking distance of Betty's house and filled with the progeny of invisible until now rich assholes even existed until right around then, so exactly how did he even know the story existed to steal it? Johnathan never claimed to have published it or even shown it to anyone, so is Jug some master hacker that trolls the laptops of Stonewall's student body, then waits for a recruiter to come to him, hands over the story and sits back, smiling, to reap nefarious rewards?

I don't mind crazy schemes, but if they could not insult the audience's intelligence so much that would be great.

2 minutes ago, Snookums said:

 

 

2 minutes ago, Snookums said:

 

 

 

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So I guess Veronica now sees the business battles between her and her dad as just the Father/Daughter bonding that it is? Because using it as a way to "fire him up" is implying that it's all just fun and games after all, so...whatever I guess.

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This one was really funny in exactly the way I like. To me, the best part was when Jughead's teacher told him 10 pages of thinly-veiled autobiography about how much he hates his classmates wouldn't help him and he was like, "Joke's on you -- it'll be more than 10 pages!"

I went to creative writing school and that scene felt very true to me.

In all seriousness, though, when he forfeited the duel with Brett last week, I thought that meant he was already quitting the secret society and renouncing the book contract and that that was the point of the gesture and his snappy statements about how he didn't want to be part of their dumb rich kid club. But now, this week, he's surprised that he's getting kicked off both things? I honestly don't understand.

16 hours ago, Snookums said:

Serious question: can anybody at all remember why the Evil Ones at Stonewall Prep were so damn desperate to get Jughead into their precious rat's nest of a school in the first place? Was it only Mr. Chipping's idea? Because if that was true it's clear this cabal could have quashed the notion before Jug heard a whisper about it. And again, he and his family have been living here for three generations and neither he nor his dad had the slightest idea about all this Baxter Brothers nonsense at all, so why on earth do they care enough to go to this ludicrous amount of trouble to make him leave a school they could have so easily kept him out of?

I think the idea is that the school, as a whole, runs the Baxter Brothers empire to keep itself afloat, and they do that by scouting the outside world for vulnerable, talented youth, and then recruiting them and stealing their ideas. So, they read Jughead's story, and they were like, "He's our next victim," and they brought him into the school and set him up to win a "contest" to get the contract, which he then didn't read but which said any ideas he submitted were their IP, and then he wrote an okay book and they made up a reason to reject it so they could steal the core idea and have their own people (the rich students) re-work it without giving him credit or money. They wanted to get the Blackhood IP from him, too, but he wouldn't submit it, and then he'd outlived his usefulness because he and his girlfriend kept asking questions, so they made up another reason to terminate the contract and get rid of him.

So, basically, everyone was in on it from the beginning and the stuff about having a rivalry with Brett was mostly just theatre while they were fattening him up to steal his ideas.

15 hours ago, thuganomics85 said:

But, hey, it was nice seeing Camila Mendes get more material here and I do think she is doing a great job with this silly, silly material.

I'm also enjoying that. I think having Veronica drunk all the time is making her give a bigger, louder, more exaggerated performance, and I'm here for it.

Also, you know what? If a teen runs an illegal booze empire, I feel like it makes sense that she has a drinking problem.

15 hours ago, thuganomics85 said:

Also, Donna claims that Evelyn (remember her?!) told her the real password to make Dark Betty go killer crazy, so that's why Betty supposedly "kills" Jughead.  I have no clue what in the hell is going on here, but I still think this is all part of Jughead's plan somehow.  

I like that this show is keeping me guessing every week about what's going on. Currently, my guess is that maybe that second trigger word makes Betty black out but not attack anyone, so the preppies took advantage of it to make her think she attacked Jughead when she didn't.

I don't know how that fits with Jughead's plan, But, perhaps he told her the plan during the blackout period, so she doesn't remember that he's faking his death? IDK. Still interested to fined out, though.

6 hours ago, Lady Calypso said:

Archie...is not going to be able to graduate with his friends, which was kind of implied for a while now but I'm surprised they followed through with it. It shouldn't be surprising since he's working two other jobs and was imprisoned and then on the run last year for a few months.

At first, I was taken aback that Archie asked if he could walk across the stage anyway, even though he wasn't graduating, but then, with the additional context that he just needs to take some classes over the summer and graduate in the fall, it made more sense.

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6 hours ago, Lady Calypso said:

Now, the question is if Veronica and Archie are in on it. My gut says no. My gut says that Betty and Jughead wanted his "death" to be as believable as possible, so by not telling the other two, it created a more believable story.

Clearly Jug is not really dead.  But if Veronica and Archie are not in on it, why would Archie declare him to be dead when he checked his pulse?  Of course, its possible that biology/anatomy are some of those classes that Archie never attends and he maybe actually doesn't know how to check for a pulse ( a skill that would seem to be invaluable in a town like Riverdale).

 

6 hours ago, Lady Calypso said:

Possibility; Jughead found some new drug to slow down his heart rate and he'll be totally fine.

Maybe its a derivative of Jingle Jangle.  Because in a town where teenagers run nightclubs, breweries, gyms, construction sites, and write long standing YA mysteries, why wouldn't there  also be chemists thrown in there.  

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11 hours ago, Lady Calypso said:

So, with Donna going to see Evelyn, I wouldn't be surprised if Jughead/Betty anticipated this and got to Evelyn first to make her a deal to lie to Donna. 

 

4 hours ago, SourK said:

I think the idea is that the school, as a whole, runs the Baxter Brothers empire to keep itself afloat, and they do that by scouting the outside world for vulnerable, talented youth, and then recruiting them and stealing their ideas. So, they read Jughead's story, and they were like, "He's our next victim,"

I think both of the above are pretty good guesses as to what is going on and why.  Betty and Jug will most likely take down the Evil Ones at Stonewall by getting them incarcerated for a plot to commit murder.  They're bringing this to a close just in time, it was getting way past the point where I was wondering why Jughead stayed at that awful school with those awful people.

When Archie first asked Keller to run the gym for him, my first thought was wait, shouldn't he be running the construction company?  Which he ended up doing.  It's plausible under the circumtances, but it looked odd to see Mr. Keller being hired for a job by a senior in high school.

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1 hour ago, Court said:

Who the heck celebrates the Ides of March?

Weirdos in Riverdale?

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9 minutes ago, rmontro said:

Weirdos in Riverdale?

The murder capital of the world, 🤣

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Who the heck celebrates the Ides of March?

Self-important one percenters who took away exactly the wrong message from Shakespeare's play.

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So, I have to believe that Betty, Archie, and Veronica all know about Jughead’s plan and are aware he’s alive. None of them have real devastation going on, lol, in the flash forwards or the new promo. The only time Betty actually looked upset was in the Pop’s scene with Archie, but I still think that was more about just feeling like he’s been gone awhile & she’s over going through with the “plan.”

I do think it’s possible Archie and Ronnie don’t know the complete truth (at first) about why Jug has to fake his death, what’s going on at prep school, which makes sense since they haven’t seen Jughead or Betty for 89 years.

As far as the plan, I don’t think Jug intended on being smashed in the skull, so I think whatever idea he has happens on the fly. Like, “Oh, shit, they hypnotized Betty to kill me, this is far more serious than we thought, I gotta go in hiding,” etc. So I like what someone mentioned here that either Brett/Donna hit Jug and planted it on Betty OR Betty actually did do it while under a “spell.”

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13 hours ago, HeatLifer said:

I do think it’s possible Archie and Ronnie don’t know the complete truth (at first) about why Jug has to fake his death, what’s going on at prep school,

Remember also, Friday the Ides of March was the deadline for Jug's Baxter Brothers story.  He might actually be acting out his submission.  Then when he comes back he gets his revenge against his persecutors and also has a story the board can't turn down.

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I really hope that Archie and Veronica were told about the plan, or else letting them, especially Archie, think that Jughead was dead! He doesent need that kind of stress! Of course, I assume that they do know the plan, or else their reactions to seeing one of their best friends murdering their other best friend was pretty...underwhelming. Maybe even they dont buy that the show would kill Jughead off? This is all a part of some plan, even if the plan had to be changed due to the kill words in Betty's head and the counter plan by the Stonewall kids. 

Oh yeah, Honey takes a hard line stance on students with alcohol in their lockers! Murderers running through the halls trying to beat students to death? Thats no big deal , but rum?!? Holy crap alert the national guard! For all his tough talk, he isnt really doing much to stem the crazy that is Riverdale High. It was pretty hilarious watching Veronica getting all pissed off and defensive about Honey busting her, calling him a fascist and everything, when he seems to be the only person who reacts in a way that makes sense to a bunch of teenagers selling rum! I know that this shouldn't be where my suspension of disbelief breaks, but its just so ridiculous that everyone is just totally cool with these teenagers making and distributing rum! Its just nuts! 

Veronica is spiraling due to Hiram's very vague illness, which makes her a pretty crappy girlfriend. I mean, Veronica has never been characterized by her overwhelming understanding of other people, but her "oh gee thanks babe let me stick my tongue down your throat) reaction to Archie taking the blame for her booze seemed pretty blase, and she never seemed to pick up on how out of sorts he was until he literally spelled it out for her. Even freaking Hiram, a man who has tried to murder Archie in several occasions, picked up on there being something wrong with him before his girlfriend did! 

Of course Stonewall has its own weird Ides of March celebrations, they are in a battle with Riverdale High as to who can be the most Extra. Jugheads reaction to his plagiarism threat was like "You?! Random background character who has hardly had any lines in weeks?!" I wonder if this has all been some big plot, that Stonewall finds non rich kids and bleeds then dry for their ideas and then kick them out as soon as they're done. Or some other evil conspiracy. Jughead and his thinly veiled autobiography was hilariously on point to writing students who are very obviously writing stuff based on their own lives, just with the names changed, all convinced that they have created high art. 

I guess Archie not being on schedule to gradate  makes sense, he has had an especially busy year being in jail, on the run, dealing with Fred and his jobs and part time vigilantism, although it is weird to have the show NOW show some real world consequences for all the the crazy that happens. I would think that most of the students on this show would struggle keeping up with homework with all the time spent on cults, conspiracies, serial killers, gang wars, etc but maybe they all just have insanely good time management?

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On 2/12/2020 at 9:12 PM, Snookums said:

Serious question: can anybody at all remember why the Evil Ones at Stonewall Prep were so damn desperate to get Jughead into their precious rat's nest of a school in the first place? Was it only Mr. Chipping's idea? Because if that was true it's clear this cabal could have quashed the notion before Jug heard a whisper about it. And again, he and his family have been living here for three generations and neither he nor his dad had the slightest idea about all this Baxter Brothers nonsense at all, so why on earth do they care enough to go to this ludicrous amount of trouble to make him leave a school they could have so easily kept him out of?

Because...reasons.

This is the quintessential MST3K show where absolutely nothing makes sense, following in spirit its classic mantra...

If you're wondering how he eats and breathes
And other science facts,
Just repeat to yourself "It's just a show,
I should really just relax..."

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On 2/13/2020 at 9:44 AM, Lady Calypso said:

So, we finally get to That Night When Jughead "Dies" (LOL) and...I mean, it's totally obvious that he's not dead. Even more so with Jughead's whole "I got a plan, Betty." So, with Donna going to see Evelyn, I wouldn't be surprised if Jughead/Betty anticipated this and got to Evelyn first to make her a deal to lie to Donna. 

Now, the question is if Veronica and Archie are in on it. My gut says no. My gut says that Betty and Jughead wanted his "death" to be as believable as possible, so by not telling the other two, it created a more believable story. However...I don't believe that the two were really just hooking up in the woods, so they could have met up with Betty/Jughead right before they went back to the party. 

Possibility; Jughead found some new drug to slow down his heart rate and he'll be totally fine. That scene with Jughead in the morgue? What we didn't see is an extended scene where he wakes up. 

What struck me is that Betty *invited* Archie and Veronica to the lame-ass prep school party. I guess it could be to spend quality time, but I think there is a plan that involves Archie and Veronica being there.

 

On 2/16/2020 at 6:56 PM, tennisgurl said:

Of course Stonewall has its own weird Ides of March celebrations, they are in a battle with Riverdale High as to who can be the most Extra. Jugheads reaction to his plagiarism threat was like "You?! Random background character who has hardly had any lines in weeks?!" I wonder if this has all been some big plot, that Stonewall finds non rich kids and bleeds then dry for their ideas and then kick them out as soon as they're done. Or some other evil conspiracy. Jughead and his thinly veiled autobiography was hilariously on point to writing students who are very obviously writing stuff based on their own lives, just with the names changed, all convinced that they have created high art. 

I guess Archie not being on schedule to gradate  makes sense, he has had an especially busy year being in jail, on the run, dealing with Fred and his jobs and part time vigilantism, although it is weird to have the show NOW show some real world consequences for all the the crazy that happens. I would think that most of the students on this show would struggle keeping up with homework with all the time spent on cults, conspiracies, serial killers, gang wars, etc but maybe they all just have insanely good time management?

Plus, wasn't Archie attacked by a bear less than a year ago?

Stonewall prep has gotten stale and unfortunately there are still a bunch of episodes to go. I hate these season arcs because Stonewall / Bret has to keep winning and is prepared for every contingency up until the last episode when everything gets resolved. Maybe they can bring back Chipping, too.

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