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David T. Cole

Kim Zolciak Biermann: Bye Bye, Wig

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I've seen her age being 37 on a lot of different sites, so unless she's done a good job of changing it online, it's probably accurate.

Raise your hand if you think there's wine in that Starbuck's cup! :)

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IIRC, some site verified her age via the Secretary of State site for voter registration or the DMV (can't remember which) and she was verified as being born in 1978 (what her Wikipedia page says).

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Weighing in on how Kim will do on DWTS:

 

Puhleeze, DWTS is WAY too much work for her. She just wants to be seen wearing the sexy outfits. Agreed as someone said upthread: she will cop to some bullshit "injury" and pull her poor me excuses. Then she will pull the mom card excuse and say that she has to get home to her babies. Don't forget this is a person who lied about having had cancer on RHof Atlanta and always made excuses to get out of the hassle and inconvenience of traveling. Plus she was delusional enough to think she had the talent to sing. Prediction: she will leave the show EARLY. Like real early. Don't forget that Kim Zolziak Biermann is the epitome of L-A-Z-Y. She'll probably wish she could hire some assistant to go to dance practice for her. 

 

Weighing in on Kim's new nose:

 

Laughable. Comical. Clownish. Ridiculous. Unnecessary. Almost looks like theatrical clay. I want to snip off the end of it. 

 

Someone upthread (whoever you are THANK YOU ! and BRAVO!), posted a picture of Lucille Ball from a scene from her old 1950's I Love Lucy show. I know and love the episode well. It's when Lucy meets the actor, William Holden, and doesn't want to be recognized because she terrorized him earlier that day in the iconic Brown Derby restraurant (the classic spaghetti eating scene). So she disguises herself  by concocting a bizaarre home made nose out of clay then puts on glasses so he won't recognize her. And then when she meets him, she lights a cigarette and the tip of that nose catches on fire ! That now infamous silly nose with the l-o-n-g tip....looks identical to Kim's.  Hah !

 

When I saw Kim recently WWHL with those glasses (she was so obviously trying to distract from the new odd nose that she was so very obviously self conscious of while she kept looking at herself in the monitor and was hesitant to smile) ....I also immediately thought of Lucy on that hilarious epic classic episode!

Edited by Bossa Nova
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This just in !.......

 

The Biermann clan back in Montana, just disappeared and decided to go underground into the witness protection program out of mortifying and permanent embarrassment.

Edited by Bossa Nova
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Kim is really great at certain dance moves. First , there's the horizontal tango (a rhtymic and sensual dance done on a bed), the goober slam (wherein Kroy is slammed to the bed for babymakin slash child support creation, and last but not least the chicka sutra (where Kim makes oral love to a chck fil a strip. You'll see, she'll be awesome!

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Kim looks a lot older than her age then. Shit like back in her Big Poppa buying her an Escalade and bickering with NeNe days on RH I thought she was like 37. Maybe she's had a hard life.

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I think it's those awful wigs that age her. They make her look like some 45 year-old Dallas stripper-turned-socialite. Also, extreme plastic surgery often has the effect of making you look like an older person trying to look younger rather than a younger person trying to prevent aging. Tori Spelling and Kim Kardashian are perfect examples.

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I think it's those awful wigs that age her. They make her look like some 45 year-old Dallas stripper-turned-socialite.

LOL ,Bitter Apple!

 

Agreed about Kim ZB, but better examples are Melanie Griffith and Meg Ryan. Both had obvious plastic surgery maybe about 10 - 15 years ago when they were in their early 40's. The results were bad then and they look even worse and older than their real ages are now. 

 

I digress, so please forgive my list of favorite aging beautifully ladies-in-show-biz idols... who are:

 

Diane Keaton, Meryl Streep, Helen Mirren, Susan Sarandon, Diane Sawyer, Oprah, Goldie Hawn

 

A few more - but they were models: Christie Brinkley (now age 62 !), Beverly Johnson.

 

Of course all may have had some things "done" , like botox or fillers, but nothing is glaringly apparent like obvious surgeries and they all still "own" their age and look great - and healthy !

Edited by Bossa Nova
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Now back to Kim. 

 

You know, ....I think she looked her best in season 1, 2, of her spin off show. Of course she was doing some stuff like botox. She looked better than even her first year or two of Real H of Atlanta where I though she looked older and such dated style. Back then, she really did look like that aging stripper, busted up, too many miles on her, cheaply made up, stereotype.

 

Then I think in the middle of these last few years of making babies, she had a bit of a healthy radiance about her. Even if she was sipping wine from her red solo cup between pregnancies, I want to believe that overall she was not smoking, drinking, and she was eating healthier. And it showed. 

 

But now she really has blown it. Clearly finished with her baby making years, she has gone indulgently crazy narcissistic with her looks. She has taken hard turn for the worse. And I wonder if there really is something there in Kim's psyche about trying to compete, well maybe not quite, but a trying to duplicate an 18 year Brielle. Like she takes a photo of Brielle to her plastic surgeon (and hair & makeup people) and says: "...Here, I want to look like her. "

Edited by Bossa Nova
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DWTS with Kim starts tonight at 8 pm.  Should be good.  Any guesses on what week Kim will be eliminated?  I think her boobs and wigs will keep her on until at least week 3.  Longer if they get a lot of cute shots of her kids. 

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Well she should be able to practice with Kroy? Didn't she meet him at a dance competition. I remember him on the dance floor, it was a ballroom dancing competition right? I don't think he was bad, he was pretty good. Oh wait, isn't he off training, this is the football season, so he's not around right?

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I watched Dancing tonight. First time in many seasons. 

 

Kim was featured 2nd to last just before that other freak show act called, Gary Busey. 

 

Summary: Kim. was. the. WORST! dancer next to Busey.

 

Lethargic, labored, nervous, amateurish, stiff and self conscious. No feeling for the music. No grace. She got "4's" from the judges. (I think one of the lowest of the night).*

 

Brielle was on camera in the audience. 

 

*Edited to add: her total score was 12 - the LOWEST.

Edited by Bossa Nova
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Kim didn't even TRY!  As everyone previously said, she is too lazy for this.  Her breasts looked ridiculously large in the outfit she was wearing, she looked like she would fall on Tony any second.  The wig was clearly a heavy, clumsy impediment, and I think the only reason she agreed to do this was to get some camera time for Brielle, who was overly made-up but beautiful.

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boKGmdC.png?1

 

This picture of Kim's new face and nose was posted over on her thread at the DWTS forum. Oh my. That new nose certainly is even more

ridiculous up close. It so Brielle !

Edited by Bossa Nova

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Just checked out the final total judge scores for last night over at abc.

 

Yep, Kim and Tony had the LOWEST at 12; Gary Busey came in at 15. Chaka Khan was at 13 - and don't forget both Chaka and Gary are way older than Kim. 

 

Scroll down in the link and you can see Kim's dance; oh my gawd, it's even worse than when I watched it last night live. 

 

http://abc.go.com/shows/dancing-with-the-stars/news/dwts-results-and-eliminations/09142015-dancing-with-the-stars-season-21-week-1-bindi-irwin-nick-carter-results

Edited by Bossa Nova
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Who is Brielle's new boyfriend? That isn't the same guy she was with on the show.

I highly highly doubt that guy would be interested in Brielle.... but I have no idea who he is. When I saw him last night I was thinking makeup artist or hairstylist or something.

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I lost a lot of respect for Kim last night.  Maybe I should have compassion for her but damn, if you're not ready don't book the gig!  She sucked so hard.  No energy in the dance, no footwork, no connection with her partner, no musicality, terrible costume.  The only positive about the performance was her wig staying on.  Then she cried all through her package and the judges critique.  Honest to Pete Kim, nobody wants to hear your lame excuses for why you suck.  "I can't shake it for anyone but Kroy!" bitch, please.  You shake it for your entire Bravo audience every week.  How many times have we heard about Kim's pubic hair and seen her breasts?  Remember the body paint Falcons jersey she did for Kroy?  Then she whined that "aren't I allowed to have a heart?".  Yes, but DWTS is supposed to be entertaining.  Watching you whine and cry and give a performance worthy of the Walking Dead is not entertainment.  She is really, really out of shape.  It just goes to show even if you lose weight if you don't exercise you will never get the muscle tone back.  And didn't she used to be a baton twirler or something dancey like that?  She needs to go home.  She's just not ready for this.  I can understand her wanting to be with her babies, that's a legit emotion that can really tear at a person and if that's the case she should just throw in the towel and go home.  I don't need to see another dance number with her moving at the speed of sloth.

Yep, Kim and Tony had the LOWEST at 12; Gary Busey came in at 15. Chaka Khan was at 13

Chaka Khan forgot her dance in the middle of it and she still did better than Kim.

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I'm just laughing my ass of because the Kim we saw last night was the exact opposite of the tiny-waisted, skinny Minnie Kim with a four inch thigh gap who regularly appears on her Instagram. So much for that diet tea and all that other crap she shills to her followers.

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Chaka Khan forgot her dance in the middle of it and she still did better than Kim.

Chaka Khan is 62.

Gary Busey is 71.

Paula Deen is 68.

All three did better than Kim.

 

Kim ...is 37.

 

Shaking my head. I can shake my booty better than Kim with zero dance lessons....and I am much older.  

Edited by Bossa Nova
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I don't think Kim was that bad.  I think she was scared and stiff (and slow) as a result.  Her body may have been stiff due to all of the work she has been doing.  I know I am pretty stiff when I learn a new exercise routine so I cannot imagine what I would feel like if I spent two or more hours a day dancing.  I don't think she deserved to receive a score lower than Gary Busey.  Her choreography looked more complicated.

 

I hope she does better next week.  She is not going to win, but I hope she relaxes and does a better job of showing what she has learned.  She and the others are putting way too much effort into learning and performing the routines to not achieve at least a sense of personal pride.

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I think it's those awful wigs that age her. They make her look like some 45 year-old Dallas stripper-turned-socialite. Also, extreme plastic surgery often has the effect of making you look like an older person trying to look younger rather than a younger person trying to prevent aging. Tori Spelling and Kim Kardashian are perfect examples.

She needs to find a better surgeon...one with a less is more methodology. I had my nose & eyelids done (genetics 'blessed' me with saggy lids at a younger age) several years ago and my doc did a fab job. Maybe she needs his card. lol

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I don't think Kim was that bad.  I think she was scared and stiff (and slow) as a result.  Her body may have been stiff due to all of the work she has been doing.  I know I am pretty stiff when I learn a new exercise routine so I cannot imagine what I would feel like if I spent two or more hours a day dancing.  I don't think she deserved to receive a score lower than Gary Busey.  Her choreography looked more complicated.

 

I hope she does better next week.  She is not going to win, but I hope she relaxes and does a better job of showing what she has learned.  She and the others are putting way too much effort into learning and performing the routines to not achieve at least a sense of personal pride.

You are a much better person than I am ToukieSmith, good on you.  I actually like Kim and was hoping for her to do well, maybe if I had gone in thinking she would bomb I wouldn't have been so disappointed.  I hope she comes back next week and kills but I really doubt it.  She has too much on her plate and flying back and forth coast to coast is an added drain on top of everything else.  Of course this is Kim we're talking about, the woman who had a "hit" despite having absolutely no singing talent whatsoever.  Maybe she can pull off a similar stunt on DWTS.

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I don't watch DWTS, it's just not my thing but....

Chaka Khan is 62.

Gary Busey is 71.

Paula Deen is 68.

All three did better than Kim.

 

Kim ...is 37.

I need this show to happen. Just only in a "Surreal Life" setting over on VH1.

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Not to get off topic too much....

 

....but I think Surreal Life is about the only reality show that Gary Busey hasn't done. Wow, talk about a has been one time "celebrity" who has made a sort of come back career only by featuring his brand of weirdness as a side show novelty on reality shows. He has now done: DWTS, The Apprentice, Celebrity Wife Swap, and that old VH-1 Celebrity lose weight show no longer on (cant recall the name). 

 

They should create a new reality show just for Busey. It could be titled: " Celebrities Who Do Too Many Reality Shows That We Now Want Off TV". 

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She needs to find a better surgeon...one with a less is more methodology. I had my nose & eyelids done (genetics 'blessed' me with saggy lids at a younger age) several years ago and my doc did a fab job. Maybe she needs his card. lol

I know alot of people that have had things done and look great, because they didn't get carried away with it. It's not the surgeon, it's Kim. She is treading dangerous territory because she has gone over to the dark side of surgery and now doesn't know when to stop. There was no need for another nose job (I don't think this was her first) and new chicklet teeth. She should have stopped after getting her boobs re-done and the tummy tuck. What the hell is wrong with Kroy? I can't believe he thinks this is ok. 

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I think the bright white horsey veneers really tipped her over the edge. They look like freaky costume dentures. Between that and the hacked nose job, she's never going to look normal again.

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I've seen her age being 37 on a lot of different sites, so unless she's done a good job of changing it online, it's probably accurate.

Raise your hand if you think there's wine in that Starbuck's cup! :)

 

Lol.  Reluctantly, I agree.  Her birth year is pretty consistently listed as 1978.   I just have trouble believing it lol.

 

(Bringing over a conversation from the Roots thread)

Kim was never married to Brielle's father, he was the police officer she had an affair with when she was 17.

She was married to Arianna's father, but he went to prison for molesting a 15-yr old.

http://www.wetpaint.com/who-is-kim-zolciaks-ex-husband-daniel-dominic-toce-740114/

 

See it's unclear to me whether the sergeant and Daniel Toce are the same man.   It's also unclear whether the sergeant is Brielle's father because he isn't named.  She was 17 when she had that affair and had Brielle when she was 19. 

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kim_Zolciak

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They are not the same guys. The police officer is listed as being 49 when he had his affair with 17-yr old Kim. Toce was born in 1973. Kim would like people to think that he's the father of Brielle also, I guess, but they didn't meet until much later. She married Toce in 2001. Arianna is now 15, so that fits.

And I'm getting that from the links provided, public record on Toce and the news article about the police officer...still unnamed. He was suspended for 45 days. Kim was a material witness he was interviewing, I'd love to know what that was all about.

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Kim was never married to Brielle's father, he was the police officer she had an affair with when she was 17.

 

Sorry, I'm not being clear about my confusion.  What I mean is that it isn't clear that the 49 year old cop is Brielle's father, as he's never identified.

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Just checked out the final total judge scores for last night over at abc.

Yep, Kim and Tony had the LOWEST at 12; Gary Busey came in at 15. Chaka Khan was at 13 - and don't forget both Chaka and Gary are way older than Kim.

Scroll down in the link and you can see Kim's dance; oh my gawd, it's even worse than when I watched it last night live.

http://abc.go.com/shows/dancing-with-the-stars/news/dwts-results-and-eliminations/09142015-dancing-with-the-stars-season-21-week-1-bindi-irwin-nick-carter-results

Well I'm no Carrie Ann and it's been years since my decades of dance classes ended, but whoever choreographed that number did a really bad job. There was no dancing. And for having a partner who isn't a dancer why put all those back bends and kicks in the routine. They look terrible. This is why I stopped watching that show. It's not always the awful dancer's fault that they lose.

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