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Dewey Decimate

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  1. As much as I enjoy watching Laurie do her badass thing, I do not want her to "win" in the end. (As much as I expect anyone to come out unscathed by the last episode.) I'm rooting for Angela and/or Wade (I want to believe he'll pull something out of his shiny hat and make up for the cactus betrayal). I choose to pretend I didn't see the imperfect cloned canine's demise.
  2. I'm genuinely enjoying this show. I started watching because as a single 40-something thought I might relate, and love Ana Gasteyer in other t.v. roles. Then I realized, hey dumbass, that's Katherine Hahn, not Ana Gasteyer, who is nonetheless still terrific. Guess I might be immoral, perverse, or simply atypical, but I don't find the May-December (or maybe February-July?) attraction too squicky. If she had met the kid at a high school function when her son was still there - yeah, ew. If he were underage - disgusting and illegal. If she were trawling specifically for milf-lovers as a fetish - uncomfortable. If she were still married - gross. But she flirts with an interested young man in a college-level (or continuing ed?) course when it seems the other main males in her life are completely shitting on her. I'm from a slightly different perspective (child-free and unmarried), but hell, will admit that I'd feel a bit giddy in a similar situation and would not hesitate to ride that wave while it lasted. Eve's fantasy and masturbation scenes crack me up; damn realistic is all I'll say. And her downright despicable kid make me thank TPTB that I have none of my own. Bless you, makers of the pill. I so hope that the girl from the autism support group does not "see the good" in him and help become "a better man". That little shit deserves to be ostracized for a good long time. The only reason I might root for his partial redemption is that it will probably pain Eve less. I'm not expecting a happy ending.
  3. I'm liking redneck Mirror cop guy more as the weeks go by. His smooth, drawling monotone is close to meditation, and I was totally with him on his empathy for those poor little squidlets.
  4. Bwah! The lovebirds' walk to the door and confetti cannon looked more like they were going to the principal's office! I did not think a Jackson win would actually be strangely satisfying!
  5. The flushed-face panic and frustration bubbling over in Jackson... Holly's sickening realization that she's shacked up with the racist/misogynist of the season... Giving. Me. LIFE!!!
  6. Oh, Nick, I don't think it's your mind that went somewhere else in the JH.
  7. Ok, admittedly I liked Christie a little more than most - or more specifically, the entertainment value she brought to the game - so perhaps I'm reading a bit too much into this, but... As I was driving this evening between work appointments, something unusual on the side of the road caught my eye. On a bucolic, well-maintained, suburban side road, the mottled dark and light stripes were unmistakable. I turned just in time to confirm that it was indeed a cracked-open half of a wayward watermelon, I imagine partially devoured by a happy raccoon. Semi-hollowed out and sadly discarded, the fruit remnant made me gasp out loud and I realized the only people who would appreciate its symbolic import are my brethren here. It's a freaking sign, people!! Jackson MotherBoy Michie will be DESTROYED tonight!!! (Anything to give me hope.)
  8. Mean girl here, but this episode felt sponsored by the ugly stick. Lori's female agent (not the POS who drives her around) in the spa - wtf was up with her lipstick? I mean, there's blow-up doll, and then there's make-out-with-an-inkpad. She's a scumbag too. How dumb of me to hope they might have gotten rid of the Gandolfini kid with the eminently punchable mug. When they showed him on the hotel balcony I was thinking "it's Chekhov's gun! He's gonna get pushed off!" Woe, it didn't happen. How has no one called out the otter pelt sitting on Bobby's head? I have to think his clean bill of health is a red herring, seeing as he fucked the random bar skank after getting the bloodwork done. Couldn't happen to a better douchebag. Then there was the kid getting confirmed, I think? I know you probably shouldn't make fun of kids, but shiiiiit is he an unappealing little mofo! James Franco may be a real-life weirdo with dubious ethics at best, but he's not a bad looking dude, yet we're supposed to believe that creepy, mushy, pale little jelly-bean-face kid is his offspring? That is supposed to be his kid, right? Between the room full of random Eye-talian relatives and Mafia assholes I really couldn't give two shits about so many of these characters and can't even bother to keep them straight. I'm in it more for Candy/Eileen. I still love her arc, even the horrific stories, and hope she gets a moderately decent ending. She is a bad boss lady with a set of values and a sense of humor. And infinite kudos to the folks who select the music for this show, most especially those responsible for the intro credits montage. Each new season I feel I'll miss the perfect song from the previous season only to wholeheartedly adopt the new one. I actually watch the entirety of the beginning credits every time; they each almost feel like a mini-movie and evoke the aura of the target years so perfectly.
  9. You know how you can hollow out an egg by poking holes in each end and blowing out the contents? I want to do that with a watermelon, refill it with human shit, and send it to Jackson.
  10. I think we now have a perfect dictionary definition for #epicfail. How in the fuck do you get Jennifer Lawrence as a clue and not say Hunger Games? X-Men blue chick? Butthole pics hacked? Bff of Amy Schumer? I'm blown away that the regular person didn't pick Oliver and Joel. Oliver was surprisingly cute and effective as a sea captain. Did the songwriter woman get Lollapalooza as a clue and say something like "a festival where you laugh a lot!" As in LOL-palooza? Holy crap. This show is circling the drain. But as someone else noted, at least Jane didn't sing.
  11. That edit? Was, as we used to say, "a little somethin' for the ladies". And boy howdy is he a specimen! I wish they'd kept the camera more on him and less on his Sarah-Palin-esque mom so dramatically clutching the arm of Jake Murray. (Makes me wonder if there's a side bet going on among the parents for who will be featured most in a given ep. Ludicrously bewigged mom? Drum-banging dad? Bring it on!) While a few more fails on this stage would have lent more credibility to the design, I didn't have a problem, knowing that stage 3 is coming up. Isn't that the one with the Ultimate Cliffhanger? I have zero rock climbing experience (and could probably barely traverse a set of monkey bars let alone complete an ANW obstacle), but that is the single most cringe-y obstacle for me. I cannot understand how a human can dangle by one's fingertips, let alone spin around and cling back on... ugh. I actually find it uncomfortable to watch. JMO. I don't mind a larger field running up to the finale.
  12. Not sure why I constantly look forward to a DE ep when I'm nearly always let down. I'm indifferent to Nicole's win, but she was just basically a minion for Jackson, no? I have no special love for Christie, but I was rooting for her to at least win veto simply as an obstacle for the odious Jackson's path to the confetti. Suddenly my interest in the season has drastically waned. But on the plus side, I finally realized my subconscious reason for not taking a shine to Cliff this whole season (in addition to consciously finding him to be a suck-up): when he gesticulates, he has this weird body shape/habit whereby his arms are locked at the elbows and he looks like a tubby T-Rex.
  13. Jackson kissing the picture of his mama after his stoic, manly rejection of weepy Holly? HELLO, Normal Bates!! For a hot second I thought there might be a hope of Holly turning against the dark side - and would rank her #1 for the season if she were to take out Jackson in the DE - but then she went back to suckle at the fruity teat of douchebro asshole par excellence. Sigh. "Prove me wrong, kids, prove me wrong!"
  14. Oh my gravy, he's wiping his eyes - it's even better than I remember! Thank you, thank you, thank you, Molotov.
  15. UO, but I'm finding this season's back end a lot more entertaining that last year's. Granted, I only watch BBAD (and read everything on this board), but I've been FFing far less (other than, like, Jess', like, whine/blame sesh with, like, Nicole. Like, blech). Their made-up games about swapping names, getting tattoos of HGs on their asses, and even most of the re-creation of the BB intro... parts of this silliness made me laugh. A fuckload better than watching silent pool playing. And goldangit if Christie is not continuing to grow on me, like a fungus in a shower. When Cliff spiked her soda with beef bouillon and she gagged into the sink, geez, she was really good-natured about it! (I always get an image of that little ingrate Paulie crying about having to put some fucking pie filling into a shell. My kingdom for someone who has a gif of him in the chef's hat, despondently waving a tiny American flag with red, swollen eyes.) Plus, many weeks ago back when Jack (hork) was still in the house, a bunch of them were having a convo about imagining how people with different first names would write restaurant/club reviews(?) - and Christie said "Jennifer.... she'd drive home and be writing a really detailed review in her head but then would get home and be like, 'fuck it'." My name is Jennifer, and holy shit did she hit the nail on the head. Call it Stockholm Syndrome, but I'm not hating this group.
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