Auntie Anxiety

Colt has become the 90 Day Jaba the Hutt.

Asuelu is having a nervous breakdown. He needs to go to his happy place. ::::adjusting volume:::::::

Is there room on the Couch of Losers for me?

An unskilled immigrant is one thing. A crazy ass immigrant who has already had more contact with the local constabulary in eight months than I have had in my entire life is yet another. Yeah, I’ll pass.

The filing left out the word “gleefully.”

For today’s drama, here’s an article in the Daily Mail. Hard to tell exactly what the true story is, but I thought it’s worth reading so you’ll have more information upon viewing Sunday’s Tell Nothing, Part Deux. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-6582209/90-Day-Fianc-s-Larissa-Dos-Santos-Lima-ARRESTED-fight-husband-Colt.html

Next season: Connor gets dishonorably discharged for being a punk and ends up coming back into the Donovan fold as the next fuckup since Bunch spends 30 years in prison and the writers need to fill the empty spot with someone equally moronic. The Donovans go to family therapy after Bridget gives Ray an ultimatum: get therapy or she will marry someone who, unlike Smitty, could actually make a lawful living. Mickey cold cocks Hawkeye during a therapy session after a fight over whose egg salad recipe is better, Hawkeye’s wife’s or Abby’s. Terry morphs into a punching bag. Lena returns to the West Coast, changes her name and opens a Bed&Breakfast where Avi works at the front desk after he gets a face transplant.

I hope my sons love me as much as Asuelu loves his mom. Seriously.

Poor Asuelu. He loves his family.

Among her other wonderful achievements, did Leida win an acting award?

Does Kolonic ever breathe through her nose?

That was the only option? What does that even mean?

Eric, she’s a shrew and a bitch. What else do you need to know?

So no Debbie? She’s an integral part of the show (and Colt’s first wife)!

Let us not forget that all these losers (except for Steven who obviously fooled Olga into thinking he was sane)had to find partners on FuckMe.com, so none of them is in any place to offer relationship advice in my opinion.

Fernanda should have been texting Jay on Tinder.

Fernanda, ever heard of Netflix?

Pot, kettle, black, Fernanda.

Fernanda, is anyone knocking down YOUR door for modeling jobs? Yeah, didn’t think so.

Host should be asking how Kolonic and Asuelu plan to afford two babies.

I hope they patted Steven down before letting him in because he looks like he’s ready to go postal on the lot of them.

Is Leida sitting on Eric’s Lap?

Boo hoo, Steven. You have such a hard life.

Hope they have some of Jerry Springer’s old bodyguards on hand because Steven is ready to blow.

Poor Olga. Find a real man, someone who respects you.