Mindymoo

To my nice fam here in the prayer closet, I don't know what to do. My beloved cat Figaro was diagnosed with congestive heart failure. He's being treated with a loop diuretic and a calcium channel blocker, both of which seem to be working, but I am having a hard time with it anyway. I can't get mad at him for the stuff I normally mad at him for, like jumping on the table and trying to eat my food. He's already acting better, he's not in pain, and he's not unhappy. Yet just typing about him, I get tears in my eyes, like it's the worst thing in the world, or as if he is already gone. I know most of you have worse problems than a sick cat, but this has been my therapy cat since I started getting sick, and my whole world would crumble if something happened to him. If you could keep Figaro in your thoughts and prayers, I would be eternally grateful. He is 13 years old, and I want him to have another happy, healthy 13 years with me if possible. He's stuck by me through every hospitalization, even visiting me at some of them, and my heart is in pieces right now. It's hard not getting upset for his sake, but I do, and then he looks at me like "Mindy, why are you so upset?" So please, keep my little buddy in your thoughts. Next to my wife, he's the most important person in my life, and I want him to be okay. He's my best friend in the whole world, seriously.Any of you with cats know what I'm talking about. So yeah. Please keep my baby in your thoughts. I honestly don't think I could cope with the real world without him.

I get what you're saying, it's just that I've known biological fathers who, aside from killing people, have done much worse things to their own families and children, and it is hard as hell to get parental rights taken away. Perhaps it was the jurisdiction they were in, but some of these folks were downright terrible. Chad seems like he loves Ray, but is terrified of him at the same time. It's a very sad situation.

Isn't Ray's son his by law though, if they were married at the time his wife gave birth? There are a lot of men who pay child support for children that aren't biologically theirs, but raise them as their own, and will continue to support them even after a divorce/separation. That's what I'm confused about. Not that it's the case here, but it's normally the father that will try to get out of paying child support/visitation when this comes to light, not the mother trying to sever ties. And it often doesn't work out that you can just drop your connection to that child.

Exactly. Get a job and, I know this may be hard for them giving their Gothardism brainwashing and all, but only have enough kids as you can comfortably afford on you and your husband's salary. Most young women don't have reality TV shows and do just fine.

I don't know if this is a popular opinion as much as a general weirdness, but I tend to find a lot of horror movies to be sad as opposed to scary. The Babadook, El Orfanto, The Devil's Backbone- all of them movies that are labeled horror, but tend to just fill me with sadness and existential dread instead. Even the movie Shaun of the Dead, which is a horror/comedy, was incredibly sad when both Shaun's mother and best friend Ed get bitten. And if horror movies aren't depressing me, they are making me laugh my ass off at the sheer absurdity of it all.

I was just about to mention the COG/Family International! What they have is basically a harem. They also send young, attractive women out to go have sex with men and bring them into the cult, in a practice called "flirty fishing." Child rape and molestation is rampant, as is encouragement of procreation. The women are just pleasure and procreative tools for the men, but aren't slut-shamed for having sex with a ton of people. It's completely bonkers, and if you leave, you are cut off from your family. (Kind of like Scientologists and their "suppresive person" thing.) David Berg was way worse than Gothard, but they are cut from the same cloth for sure.

Perhaps the whole thing is a conspiracy of gingers wanting to take over the LA transit system?

I got ya. Perhaps if someone put a fish in a percolator, and we got 12 dozen donuts, we could figure this whole thing out.

It reminds me of Twin Peaks when they doubled the episode order against the Lynch and Frost's wishes, and David Lynch left the show for awhile to go shoot "Wild at Heart", and Mark Frost didn't give a fuck. The big mystery was solved, and everyone just sauntered around. It was jarring and made no sense. That's what this is like: David Lynch-less Twin Peaks.

We'd be having a "Free Churchhoney" rally in your honor. I knew kids kinda like the Duggars. They went to public school, but everything was church, church, church, god, god, god, all the time. One girl, a Mormon, was abruptly removed from school and sent to live with relatives in Utah when she was caught kissing a black boy in the broom closet. We also had a lot of these churchy girls getting pregnant from trysts in said broom closet and disappearing for a few weeks, and coming back magically without child. A lot of these girls are saddled down with multiple children, a divorce or three under their belt, and not even thirty. Many didn't even make it to graduation. I went to a Pentecostal youth group with a girl who was an acquaintance from the school rock band that I was the lead singer/guitarist of because she wouldn't stop bugging me about it. Because the place scared the hell out of me and due to their bashing of gays (which I am) Catholics (which my family is) Muslims and waiting for the rapture, I refused to go back. She started telling everyone I was a demon because of that. I'm a lot of things, but I'm a nice person, and even if I don't believe in an afterlife, I'm not going to let you condemn my Busia, the best person I have ever known, to hell just because she's a Catholic. They also said stupid stuff about how Jesus wouldn't go near AIDS patients without wearing rubber gloves- and they weren't joking. A lot of these people would use the phrase "I will pray for you" as a code for "fuck you". Very judgmental, but they were raised that way and I hope that some grew out of it.

Basically. People getting marriage, sex and child-rearing advice from people who have never been married, are celibate, and have no kids. It boggles the mind. It's nice to be a none.

The best part of it all was when I became an altar girl. I was the best damn altar girl there ever was, because the more times you served mass, the more of a discount you got on the end of the school year trip to Cedar Point. I got to go for free, and since the priest trusted me so much, he had me serve funerals and weddings. And I got PAID. $15 per funeral, $45 per wedding. At an old Polish parish where a ton of parishoners kept dying off, I was making bookoo bucks. We switched churches and schools when I started sixth grade, and since they didn't have those perks, I quit being an altar girl. I did a lot of religious research, liked nothing but some Buddhist teachings, but still am an atheist. (Okay, I did get ordained as a Dudeist priest.) I also told my parents that if they made me get confirmed, I would stand in front of everyone, tell them that everything they believed in was bullshit and that I worshiped Satan. My brother and his friend kept telling me that if I got confirmed I'd make a ton of money, but I refused because it was against my principles. My parents never made me get confirmed or go to church outside of a wedding or funeral again. I wish that one of the Duggars would have that kind of a revolt against their parent's teachings. I pissed off a lot of nuns back in my Catholic school days.

My cousin was 18 and she committed suicide. She had severe mental issues, along with a history of physical and sexual abuse that we didn't find out about until after she died. They wouldn't bury her in the Catholic cemetery next to my beloved Aunt Lulu because she was a suicide, and I heard distant family members whispering about how she was going to hell. At the age of five, I said to myself "this is garbage: a loving god would not send my cousin to hell just because she committed suicide. She was sick and wanted to end her pain." (I was an enlightened child, a depressed child, and had been suicidal myself.) That's when I realized what BS it all was, and stopped believing in god.

Same here. 28, a lesbian, infertile due to a hysterectomy, raised a Catholic until I became an atheist at the age of five. No way in hell would anything this clown has to say apply to me.

When I was sexually assaulted by my friend and her sister, and by my brother's best friend, I was in my bed "asleep." In all actuality, I was playing possum, waiting for it to be over. It could have lasted 10 or 20 minutes, but it felt like hours. The "they were all asleep" story doesn't wash much with me either.

Watch "Black Jesus" on Adult Swim. Jesus came back, he's black, and he lives in Compton. He smokes weed and drinks 40s, but he is passing his message of love and acceptance (and healthy eating) along to those who believe in him. Without revealing too much, he ended up in a 51/50 hold. It's a great show, absolutely hilarious.

Do you have DirecTV? Because they updated Sundance to HD a few months back from SD, and now the show looks much better.

I just want to know what everyone has against e-cigs! Paul and Ray tease Ani about it in their scenes with her... I mean, they don't make you reek like smoke, they don't have all of the chemicals that cigarettes have, and they help people quit smoking! My aunt smoked since she was a teenager, and just quit in her mid 50s using an e-cig. I even use one (sans nicotine, since I was never a cigarette smoker) because I like to vape the flavor of Cap'n Crunch Crunchberries without all of the calories! Did Pizzalatto's nephew get poisoned while drinking a bottle of e-juice that had 18mgs of nicotine in it thinking that it was Kool-Aid or something?

With my health issues and genetic disorders, even if I still had a uterus, I would never have been able to survive a pregnancy. My mom had a full breech with my brother- he came out butt first, and they wouldn't call in the anesthesiologist because they didn't want to wake him up. (This was in 1982.) They had to keep him wrapped tightly for the first few weeks of his life because when they'd unwrap him, his ankles would fold back up to his shoulders. My mom had to have reconstructive surgery, and it's amazing she ended up having me at all, though my birth wasn't nearly as traumatic. I have to give it to you moms, even if I was capable of giving birth, I don't think I could ever do it.

I'm never having kids (had a hysterectomy in March for adhesions and menorrhagia, and my fiancee doesn't want to carry a pregnancy either) but if I did, I would want to have it done the way my Busia did it: knock me out for about four days so I don't feel a thing and am not even conscious, and give me the baby when it's all cleaned up and cute looking. Which is probably why I'm better off raising cats, bunnies and sloths.

Thank you everyone! We are going to have it a little unconventional. A mix of Polish food (homemade pierogi, since I am the pierogi queen), Japanese (sushi), Thai (summer rolls and pad Thai) and Indian (Samosas and chicken korma.) Probably a salad and some crudites. It's at a winery, so wine and beer will be offered. It will be casual, other than the saris and caftans that the bridal party and my parents/Busia are wearing. Frankly, I'm inviting everyone to wear a sari or caftan if they want, because they're so comfortable and relatively inexpensive. The one I'm looking at is under $100. We're doing henna, too. We're not having a DJ, because I have a PA system and I'm going to have a mix of nothing but Rush, Pink Floyd, Frank Zappa, The Who, The Grateful Dead, Yes and The Beatles. Maybe a little Sinatra since me and Busia both love him. I'm singing and playing the guitar for my wedding vows to Cindy, and they are the song "Here, There and Everywhere" by The Beatles. The venue is a winery on Lake Erie, but it's not the gross icky part of Lake Erie- the water is actually blue! We went wine touring when a wedding was taking place, and it was just the loveliest thing. The song first song we're dancing to as a married couple is "Love Reign O'er Me" by The Who. I haven't chosen a song to dance with my dad to yet, he'll probably choose something by The Dead or something. I'm going to have a dance with my Busia too, because she's just the best, and is the most supportive woman ever. My aunt and uncle from Florida are going to be a prominent part of our wedding, because although I'm an atheist, he is my godfather and I came out to them right after I came out to my Busia. They've been nothing but loving and supportive of me and Cindy's relationship, and I want them to stand up for us at the wedding. I just want everyone to have a nice time, and when the evening is over, we're heading over to the casino, since our hotel is Caesar's Windsor. We thought it would be cute to have the wedding party take pictures in our attire in the lobby, and maybe play some roulette or something on our lucky day. It's so nice to look at our day in realistic terms, instead of "if we are ever allowed to get married, it would be nice to do XYX".

Thanks everyone! When the news came down, it took every ounce of self control for us to not run down to the courthouse and get married on the 26th. (Ours was prepared, already had paperwork that said "applicant one" and "applicant two", it was approved by the city and there were ministers and justices of the peace willing to do the ceremonies. We didn't have jerks refusing to hand out licenses like they have had in other places.) But we decided to wait and just have the celebration with family and friends. It's great to finally have the right, and to see all of our friends' wedding announcements coming out in droves. I thought this day wouldn't come for a long time, but it's so nice that when we do get married, it will be the same as everyone else's in the eyes of the law. It won't be a huge lavish wedding, but it will be a hell of a party and a celebration of our love.

So with the Supreme Court's wonderful ruling on June 26th, my fiancee` and I finally set a date! August 5th, 2017. It will be at a winery in Essex County, Ontario, which is near Windsor. (There's a bit of a story behind that. There are some people that we kind of don't want to have at the wedding, but will raise a stink if they're not invited. So if we make it so they have to have passports, which most of them don't have and won't bother getting, problem solved!) We are wearing saris, and each member of the wedding party (maid of honor, man of honor, three maids, one groomsman) are wearing a different color. I'm having a man of honor instead of a maid of honor, and it's my cousin and best friend. He's going to wear a sari because, in his words, he "doesn't believe in traditional gender roles or expression." Cutest part of all? I had my Busia over for dinner last night to discuss it all. She wants to wear a sari too, is so excited for us, and told me not to worry about to people in the family who are against our marriage and will poo-poo the whole affair, because they don't matter. All that matters is that we love each other, and that the people we want to be there will be there to celebrate with us. And she told us we better not do it any later than 2017, because she's 82 now and she's not getting any younger. I'm so excited and have been finally taking a serious look at wedding saris. We celebrate our five year anniversary in August, so it will be nice to be married close to our seven year anniversary.

I remember that well. It could be a BS excuse, but a lot of people start out that way. I've known many. (I'm personally very lucky because I have a genetic disorder that makes me immune to the blotto side effects of opiod pain killers, so they help my pain, but don't make me loopy. I was on morphine and fentanyl for seven years, and went through the hell of withdrawal at the end, but was never addicted to them. I was just hospitalized for a really bad DVT and was getting 2mg dilaudid every four hours, and it didn't make me "high" at all. It just treated my pain. If it wasn't for the awful swollen leg and the pain, I'd have been safe to drive afterwards. A couple of beers, on the other hand...) But many, many people start taking them legitimately, then get addicted like Jackie. With DEA regulations becoming stricter, a lot of people are no longer getting the actual medications they legitimately need and are turning to the streets so they don't go without, and that is turning people into addicts. A lot of addicts keep taking them and don't even get high anymore, they just take the drugs so they don't go into withdrawal and get sick. (And let me tell you, withdrawal is absolute misery.) There were times where Jackie was using and seemed completely with it and okay, and others where she seemed high as a kite and dangerous to patients. It really depends on the particular drugs, if the are instant release or controlled release, and the dosage.

You just never know with addicts and the mentally ill. (And since addiction is a disease and all.) My great aunt was bi-polar, or what they called a manic depressive in those days. She poisoned herself with exhaust fumes in the early hours of the morning of her daughter's first communion. My Busia ended up raising three of her seven children because her dad was a bit of an absentee father and he remarried quickly and the woman was a rotten piece of work who treated the children like garbage. With Jackie, I have no trouble seeing this as an intentional overdose. Heroin wasn't her drug of choice, and while it is an opiate, she had been mostly clean for awhile. A lot of addicts end up overdosing when they start using after a period of sobriety. Their tolerance goes down. Not to mention the fact that she took a ridiculously large amount of heroin. Everything and everyone was moving on without her. Sure, she got the job at Bellevue, but Zoey wasn't following her, her daughters didn't need her, her ex-husband was happy with his new family, O'Hara seemed done with her, and Eddie was going to prison. She had nothing left. So why not? If there were *literally* no drugs left in the hospital pharmacy, there would be no narcan to save her ass either. So she took herself out. I don't find that too hard to stomach.