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Posts posted by psychoticstate

  1. First things first, Lifetime, this was NOT an enjoyable or entertaining episode.  Michaela needs help.  We'll get back to her.

    Loved the ranch.  I'm not a country person (hey there, Brett) but that looked like a nice, relaxing weekend (Michaela and Zak shenanigans aside).  

    With a few others, I actually love Myrla.  I think she is the most authentic MAFS this season.  She is who she is and that's that.  And I say that as someone who did not like her in the first episode(s) and who thought she and Gil had the worst match (before Michaela and Zak said "hold my beer.")  

    Gil, honey, I am not as "princessy" as Myrla but I'd be thrilled too if someone told me they had booked the penthouse suite at the Ritz Carlton for me.  Just saying.  

    I liked the horseback riding but I'm with Myrla.  I would want to move a little faster and get better views.  Good on Gil for doing something that Myrla wanted to do and enjoyed (take note, Vincent from the ATL.)  

    Hype!  Yay, Hype!  He was so chill coming into the house (and with all these lunatics around.) 

    I consider Johnny a Class A Fuckwit (and I liked him at the start) but the doggy-bone cookies with Baxter's name and the sparklers was one of the sweetest tributes to a pet I've seen.  What a wonderful thing for them all to do for Brett.  

    Why did Johnny go to the couples retreat if his plan of action was to avoid Bao as much as possible?  Bao deserves so much better.  Johnny deserves a kick in the pants.  

    Why didn't Johnny participate in the skeet shooting?  Was it because Bao was down for trying it?  He really does deserve that biggest drama queen crown Bao gave him.  (Bao for the win.)  

    Brett and Ryan are just consistent missed opportunities.  Ryan says he wishes he could give Brett more support over losing Baxter.  Well, why aren't you?  Dude, you are a dog dad.  You should be able to relate to her grief and even if you don't feel that she's the wife you wanted, she's a human being who is grieving.  If you like her, even just a little, how hard is it to say "I'm here if you need me" and give her a hug?  These things aren't difficult.  Small children do them instinctively.  I get these two are very awkward together but I think in part it's due to the fact that neither of them seem capable of having a conversation with the other.  Have they not been capable of having a movie night at home, where each chooses one movie they like and then they can talk about that?  Have they not spoken about past relationships?  Do they talk about work?  Do they talk to each other about anything at all?  Lord, they are tiring.

    Rachel and Jose really didn't do much other than winning games of cornhole.  

    Now for the nonsense.  When Michaela clearly isn't living at the apartment and she and Zak turn up at the retreat saying that they are so happy, everything is perfect, speak your truth, etc., you just know it's going to get ugly.   So they decide (off camera) that their plan of action is to decide to divorce on Decision Day but then basically date each other and try to work things out, without the entire "process" being involved.  Well, that seems nuts.  I mean, you're already married.  I get wanting to work on things without the camera crew being present and all but Zak, honey, you have been shown the light.  You have seen the many, many red flags, the first of which started when your new wife left you in Florida with COVID to return to Houston.  Your relationship with Michaela is not healthy for either one of you.  

    That said, I initially thought that Michaela was being attacked by a swarm of bees at Zak's talking about the divorce plan.  WTH is wrong with her?  This is exactly why he really don't want to be with her, IMO.  I don't think he truly has any intention of dating her or trying to work things out after they divorce; I think he's trying to keep the peace (and his throat from being cut) as much as possible because Michaela ain't right.  

    Why these couples think right before bed is the perfect place to have Serious Conversations is beyond me but here we are.  Michaela flips out over the divorce plan and then tells Zak he can leave, she doesn't need him, she does not want to ride back to Houston with him the next day.  So when he says he will leave right then, she flips again and says that she has no problems riding with him and she just misunderstood what he was saying.  Say what now?  Then they get into it again and Michaela tells him to leave and denies that she ever said she was down with riding back to Houston with him.    Houston, we have many problems.  

    Zak is not innocent but this is ridiculous.  Michaela is two seconds away from burning the entire house down just to show Zak or take Zak out.  Like I said, girl ain't right.  

    Then after calling her sister and getting her sister involved, she pivots again and then tells Zak that since it's late (11 p.m.), he should just stay, go to sleep and then get up in the morning and he can leave.  From anyone else, that makes sense.  However, from Category 5 in the room with him, I don't blame him for being worried that he will be smothered by a pillow in the night.  

    So Bao gets woken up and is listening and then watching (once the screaming match moves into the hallway) in horror.  Even Hype, who is chilling in his bed, is looking at these two like "People, please."  Love Hype!  

    Long story short, Zak leaves - although it seems like the MAFS-ers who are still downstairs may have been in the process of calming him down and getting him to change his mind until Hurricane Michaela blows in.  

    I have to say, were I in the market for a home in Houston I would never, EVER call Michaela the realtor after watching her here.  After Zak leaves, Hurricane Michaela takes her damaging self back inside, where she throws a table, attempts same with the pool table, breaks at least one wine glass and then has to be restrained by someone in production before she slams the bedroom door.  Girl . . . 

    Jose needs to get his whiteboard out and carefully outline for Zak and Michaela what's what because we all know the "experts" aren't going to address the mentally ill/chemically imbalanced elephant in the room.  This. Is. Not. Normal. Behavior.  And this is not because Michaela has abandonment issues.  This is much deeper than that.  

    Shame on the "experts."  Zak and Bao should be lining up to kick the experts in the teeth over their matches.  Gah.  



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  2. Just now, Andi27 said:

    Really interesting that Crystal, who really sympathized with Erika during the season because of her father, was completely stonefaced during that part of the conversation about recognizing cognitive decline/dementia. I can't see how she can side with Erika abandoning Tom when he became ill.

    Crystal knows Erika's full of it.

    • Like 24
  3. Even if we believed for a second that Erika was handing over every cent to Tom and had no access, why didn't she talk to the glam squad that was getting $40k a month and ask them to start sending Tom invoices for $50k or more and then put the difference into an account with her name on it?  

    Her excuses and protestations remind me of when Princess Diana claimed she didn't make crank calls because she didn't know how to use a pay telephone.  Uh-huh.  

    • Like 18
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  4. So Erika's nasally voice apparently took a powder and her insanely dark, thick brows filled in.  

    Dorito won the best dressed for me, followed by Garcelle.  Erika looked like some deranged Hello Kitty anime figure.  The shade of blue on Sutton was pretty but the dress was 80s all the way (shoutout to the 80s!)  Crystal's dress was safe but boring.  Kyle's dress was fine -- except for the belt buckle across her chest.  Girl, it's October.  Save the ta-tas month.  

    Rinna.  I'm not sure which was worse.  Her "Priscilla" pony or that purple thing she wore.  She must have gotten a memo that her diamond was in jeopardy because she was gunning for Garcelle with no real reason.  And is there any doubt that Kyle was probably the person that told Garcelle what Rinna ALLEGEDLY (shout out to Erika!) said about Garcelle bringing race into the show?  

    Overall I found part 1 fairly boring.  Nobody cares about Dorito's issues with Garcelle.  Rinna's issues with Garcelle were fake and forced.  Nobody believes that Harry Hamlin told Rinna he was concerned about Garcelle because nobody believes that Harry Hamlin and Rinna converse off camera.  Sutton should have jumped in and brought up that when Erika was not present, everyone had something to say but as soon as she showed up, they didn't say a word unless it was throwing Sutton under the bus.  Erika can say that she didn't quit the Hos because she honors her commitments all she wants but we all know that she didn't quit because girl needs the money.  

    Next week, I hope in addition to Erika's feet being held to the fire, it's brought up how often Kyle was shit-stirring and bringing stuff back up that had been squashed.  

    And Bravo, WE KNOW that Halloween Kills is released this Friday and Kyle is in it.  We didn't need promos every commercial break nor the fakity fake "Michael Myers" encounter Kyle had outside her door.  She obviously knew it was coming and it was being filmed.  Girl jumped at the thought of a real animal popping out at Crystal's party so if she had not been in on it, she not only would have seen "Michael Myers" much sooner (like as soon as she went out the door) but she would have nearly had a heart attack and jumped the entire length of her height.  

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  5. Lord, this week was messy.

    I was married to a Jose and Rachel needs to get her things and peace out.  If Jose is doing this a month in while being filmed and surrounded by production, he's got major anger issues.  What's going to happen should you forget to pay a bill or make dinner or the kids wake him up in the middle of the night?  I don't want to see Rachel on an episode of 20/20, Dateline or 48 Hours.  

    I did love that Jose was totally read by the guys during the golf outing.  They clearly knew he wasn't telling the whole story.  I'm also glad to see they all seemed to believe that Rachel calling him a different name (and another "J" name) was not that big of a deal (it's not, especially given the circumstances.)  

    I think Zach was halfway out during the non-honeymoon honeymoon.   Michaela ran back to Houston, which would have made me feel a certain way (and not a good one).  I get that Zach had Covid but she could have stayed and at least let him know she was there if he needed her.  It seemed very selfish to go back to Houston (and still seems so to me.)  And the morning meltdown where she called him a mother-effing liar and/or whatever else she said?  Kind of like Jose, no?  I'd be out.  Again, to have this level of reaction and during the so-called honeymoon period is a major red flag.  

    I agree with the poster upthread who mentioned that a tantric sex class for someone who isn't feeling attraction to his partner may not be the best move.  Personally, I think Ryan could change his feelings about Brett if she went outside her comfort zone and went two-stepping with him or something like that.  She's not his type but I think he also put a wall up when he saw that she wasn't into country pursuits like he is and seems freaked out/afraid by lots of things.  (Of course I also initially liked Harry and Meghan as a couple so it shows you that my feelings are clearly skewered and suspect.)  So while I will laugh and laugh when Harry and Meghan do eventually divorce, I want for Brett and Ryan to work out.

    I think Bao and Johnny are cute and have a good chance if they deadbolt the door on the experts.  See Jose for assistance with deadbolts.  

    From the first episode or so, I thought Myrla and Gil were going to be the obvious train wreck (see disclaimer above about my feelings being suspect and skewered) but I actually think they are cute and see a possibility.  Gil is very patient and clearly devoted to making it work.  Myrla is lucky that she was paired with him.  At least she finally admitted that she has an issue with intimacy - he seems like the perfect (MAFS) partner for her in that regard. 

    Right now, I feel like the only couples that truly have a fighting chance are Johnny and Bao and Gil and Myrla.   Ryan isn't feeling it, Zach is fearful that Michaela is going to kill him in his sleep, and Jose is probably on an FBI wanted poster somewhere.  

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  6. Who would have thought?  Last week, PK was the MVP and voice of reason.   This week, Kathy is making me laugh and I really appreciate her scenes.  

    I thought my ex-husband could tell some whoppers when it came to lies but I think Erika's got him beat.  And did she get her medical degree while working that pole or on the side when she wasn't being Erika Jayne?  While I have heard it's not a good idea to be put under with a TBI, I'm fairly certain the doctors would know that too.  And despite Erika apparently knowing everything that is going on with Tom (including the plethora of car accidents and vehicle rolls), now she's saying that Tom could have been shot, stabbed, etc., she just doesn't know?  I mean, I understand by looking at Erika that no one has ever told her that less is more but that saying would certainly be relevant in her rehashings of the many pitfalls of Tom and Erika.  Girl, bye.  

    I've been to Del Mar but never traveled like these women.  So jealous.  What gorgeous suites.  I did snort with laughter at Garcelle saying if she saw two twins in the hallway, she was out!  

    What is the deal with them constantly picking on Garcelle?  I think they're intimidated by her (well, except maybe for Kathy) because Garcelle truly generally has no fucks to give.  Take that, Erika. 

    Upthread Big Kathy was mentioned.  Seriously, worst mother ever.  Bad enough she was letting Kyle drive around L.A. at 13 but she turned the sisters against each other for years.  What a miserable woman.

    • Like 16
  7. At long last, Lexi is fired.  Of course, she should have been fired after assaulting Lloyd in the hot tub and being disrespectful and insubordinate to Katie and Malia -- and most certainly after putting her hands on Mzi.  

    I think Mat is a vile person when he's drinking, he most definitely is a shit stirrer but he does his job without complaints and he doesn't put hands on people, so therein lies the difference.

    Katie's decision to not bring Delaney back will certainly not be a good one.  While it's okay for her to say she's fine without breaks and working even harder, she should have talked to Courtney about it before nixing Delaney with Captain Sandy.  Courtney may not be okay with forgoing breaks and working harder.  And yes, one fewer stew means a larger tip, it means a larger tip for everyone, not just the two people whose workload increased.  I don't think Katie realized that Delaney was pretty much doing all the work as far as laundry and cabins while Lexi stood by and complained and snacked.   

    Malia can make excuses all she wants but she's in charge of the deck crew and so if David is injured, it's on her that she didn't report it to Captain Sandy.  I have a sneaking suspicion that if everything with Lexi had not gone down at the same time, Sandy wouldn't have been so harsh on her pet but Malia had it coming.  

    All these people drink like they're in the green room of the Jerry Springer Show but if they didn't, I guess they wouldn't bring the drama.

    • Like 13
  8. It's taken me two days to post because I had to do some healing after hearing Lisa talk about milking a prostate or whatever.  Ugh.  Whatever kinky shit y'all get up to, Lisa, PLEASE for the love of baby Jesus, keep it to yourself.  (And girl, based on what you did let slip, I would want more than a minivan too.)  

    Deonte, please grow a spine and be at least as much of a man as Lisa.  You don't need to talk to Nicolle about anything.  Shut her phone off, burn Nicolle, Jr. and consider it a lesson learned for all concerned.  She's a ho who is using you for your bank account.  If nothing else, listen to your friend who, outside of the pets, is the smartest person on this show.  

    I have to admit that I thought Tia was a guy in the previews.  

    So why can't Brittany just tell Ray that her family has an issue with him having a record and they'll need to take it very slow with them?  Girl, get a t-shirt made up that says that.  You have a shirt for every other occasion.   Ray's family seems decent and nice and Ray seems like he's focused on getting his life together.  

    Doug just gives me the willies.  Period, end of story.  I appreciate that he has a job but please stop complaining about being hot or whatever because it has to be better than being locked up.  Of course we have yet another LAL former inmate who's got to go to some hapless store owner and explain how they just got out of prison.  Excuse me, Doug.  The man with a bunch of diamonds may not feel super secure with you, knowing that you've just gotten out of prison.  I guess at least Doug didn't tell him the longest he's ever been out of the pokey was 40 days.  
    I was laughing like an idiot over Doug choosing the Remember the Crime Victims bench as the perfect spot to officially propose to Rachel.  Now, I've never been to Detroit, have no idea bout 8 Mile but there looked to be other green areas that would have made a better proposal site than a memorial to murdered people.  Just saying.  And of course Rachel said yes and of course Doug is smiling and grinning over "social media" (what's her name?)  

    Over at Angela and Tony Part 2's lot, Jeff has discovered that you can actually order shit online and they deliver it to you within two days!  (And Anissa should be discovering that giving Jeff her credit card is a HUGE mistake.)   So Jeff has ordered a drone on Amazon since he can't leave their property and this will allow him to see the world.  If you see a random drone out your window, it's likely Jeff in his quest to see the world.  What Jeff really needs to do is see about some teeth he can receive in two days.  Anyhow, Anissa points out that there is a stack of Amazon packages on the front porch, compliments of Jeff and her credit card, and that he pretty much spends his days ordering shit and gambling online.  Anissa, Anissa, Anissa.  Girl, once he's maxed out your credit cards, he's going to be online with other women (if it's not already happening.)  If Doug -- DOUG -- can get a job, surely Jeff can too.  Or does he also ghost employers?   Anyway, Angela's friend Tommy Anissa's friend Kyle is tired of Jeff's shit and tells Anissa Jeff's secret, along with his opinion that the timeline doesn't add up and he thinks this supposed child is younger than 18.  We do too, Kyle.  Jeff is tired of Kyle interfering, thinks it's none of Kyle's business (maybe you shouldn't have told him, genius) and then promptly flies his drone into a tree.  You can pick them, Anissa.  At least if Jeff and Kyle get into that seemingly inevitable fight, Kyle will only have about three teeth to knock out.

    So next week is the season finale?  Huh?  This seemed very short.  We haven't seen hardly anything on Pickle and Josh.  

    The previews . . . ummmm . . . how is putting Kristianna in a hat and vest dressing her up like Bonnie Parker?  She looked absolutely disgusted.  You would think John would learn from putting her on the spot with the truck bed wedding last time.  

    And did Lacey say that she and Chane had been having sex six times a day?  Or were my ears still traumatized from Stan and Lisa?  If she did, okay, Samantha Jones, cool your jets.  Y'all have like a half dozen kids and somebody in that house has got to be working.  OF COURSE it seems that Lacey is on the phone with Chon.  

    I look forward to two hours of fuckery on Friday! 


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  9. On 7/28/2021 at 8:26 PM, MyTwoCents said:

    Was watching the upcoming scenes and am horrified and a little grossed out by a couple of the upcoming brides in their dresses. Two have huge boobs (one gal’s obviously fake) and they’re wearing a wedding dress that’s cut down to ‘there’ with the netting to show off the cleavage like they’re walking a red carpet. It’s your wedding day, for heaven’s sake; show a little class. The other, poor girl, seems to have a saggy problem. Why is she showing that off?

    I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking this.  This is not only the first time you see your stranger spouse but their families and all they're going to see is boobs (because that's all I can see.)  The dresses wouldn't be so bad if they weren't cut down so low.  It reminds me of tacky Kim Zolciak and her desire to show side boob on her wedding day.  Klassy.

    That said, Bao looked absolutely gorgeous.  In fact, her wedding day look may be my favorite in all of MAFS history.

    • Like 9
  10. I've never been on a luxury yacht (and I would think the same of some of the folks on this show) so forgive my ignorance but is it norm to have one chef to cook for all the crew and all the guests?  If that's true, it's a bit ridiculous.  It's not like the crew and guests are eating the same and I would be annoyed at never getting a break, nor having back up.  

    That said, Matt was absolutely, positively in the wrong to jump on his Huffy bike and pedal away without telling Sandy.  Sure, Sandy can be annoying and I still haven't forgiven her for Kiko, but she is his boss and if he's the only chef, that jeopardizes not only the next charter but potentially the season.  Not cool, Matt. 

    I wonder if it was more the alcohol talking than anything else - although he did seem pretty pissed that he had to cook for the crew.  Does the chief stew not meet with the chef to go over guest preferences and what to order, etc.?  

    Bravo, please stop with the mics in the bathroom.  Not necessary.

    This was clearly the week for sloppy drunks, starting with Orbinson, Jr. and continuing on to Lexi.  At least O, Jr. left the boat.  Lexi can follow.  She's disgusting.  She takes mean girl to a whole new level.  When I'm taking Malia's side and almost feeling sorry for her, whoever is forcing me into Malia's corner has got to go.  What Lexi did to Lloyd is assault.  Period.  And from the previews, it looks like she hits Mzi, who has got to be one of the nicest people we've ever seen on BD.  I would assume under normal (i.e., non-reality tv) situations, that act will get her fired.  (Although telling your chief stew to F off seems like a fireable offense as well.) 

    Katie continues to be an awesome chief stew. 

    I am sorry for Courtney and the situation with her dad but her laugh is like nails on a chalkboard to me.  Cringey.

    OF COURSE both David and Lloyd "like" Malia.  They both immediately lose points from me for that alone.  Malia is not the be-all, end-all.  Frankly, that ugly tattoo would turn me away but I digress.  We don't need some phony love triangle from TPTB in order to showcase their little sweetheart.  

    Marten is totally hot.

    I thought the scene with the kids playing hide and seek on the boat was cute.

    That's all I've got.  

    • Like 12
  11. I had to check out my window after watching this episode for the pigs flying by because, outside of the Thomasina comment, I am really enjoying Kathy.  She breaks the tension with her humorous comments and her (shall we say) naivete.  Well done, Kathy.  (But please stop calling Sutton Thomasina).  

    I guess stirring the pot runs in the family because Kyle pulled out her spoon with the question on whether Amelia was traveling with Lord Disick.  I'm pretty sure Lisa said last week that Harry wasn't too thrilled about the Hamlin, Jr./Disick hook up so unless you're trying to start something, Disick shouldn't have been brought up at all.  But of course Kyle is happy to have someone in the hot seat so long as it's not her.  

    I loved how Harry told Dorit and Kyle that Lisa had done nothing to prepare for the party she planned.  Ha!  

    Erika, I don't think anyone is going to feel sorry for you in your $10K a month rental.  

    Sutton really had no business criticizing Crystal's leather pants (or anyone's outfit) while wearing that dress and she's way over-emotional but Crystal is a total smug asshole for someone who's only accomplishment appears to be marrying very well and spitting out two kids so I have to take Sutton's side on that count alone.


    • Like 21
  12. On 6/30/2021 at 9:14 PM, Caseysgirl said:

    Unpopular opinion coming up - Portia REALLY overacted.  My kids were very close & loved each other as much as Kyle’s do but none of them ever reacted to seeing their sibling come home from college by crying hysterically the way she was.  She doesn’t seem to know how to be subtle in her responses. Also, all that spoiling her when she was younger has come back to bite them in the butt; her sisters never seemed as snotty as she does.

    Move over and make space for me, @Caseysgirl, because I was feeling the same.  Loving your family is one thing but she was beyond hysterical.  That is NOT normal, and especially not from a 13 year old.  I found myself feeling sorry for Mauricio being in this family full of criers and overreactors.  I guess Portia will have a full-on breakdown when Sophia has to go back to school following the Christmas break?  

    I love Garcelle.  

    I didn't think I would like Kathy but her don't-give-a-fuck attitude is pretty damn funny.  

    Mazel tov, Dorit!  Ha.

    Shut up, Crystal.  

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  13. 3 hours ago, J80134 said:

    Suddenly Erika is out in sweats and no makeup, filling up her range rover with medium grade gas, grabbing pork skins and a slurpee before heading off to Nordstrom rack and dinner at the olive garden. All in hopes of the judge, and the public, seeing how down and out in Beverly Hills she is. 

    Exactly what I thought too.  She's putting on yet another performance.


    15 minutes ago, dosodog said:

    I don't think the howives will ever be honest nor change their opinion on Ericka.

    Enough stuff has come out and has any of them said anything on social media?  Radio silence?

    They will be more concerned about Ericka's reputation and the optics, then they will be about the actual victims.

    Why?  Because their priorities are weird and awful.

    I have to wonder if they are worried about their own skeletons coming out of the closet.  Who knows what Erika may know or have heard? 

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  14. From the article @Persnickety1 linked.


    "At one point I had about $80 million, or $50 million in cash — that's all gone," he says in the clip. "I also had a stock portfolio of about $50 million, and that's all gone."

    So Tom had a combined $130 million per his deposition testimony and it's all gone?  Where the ever loving f*ck did $130 million go for two damn people??  That is INSANE.  


    Jayne, 49, was subpoenaed twice to give a deposition about the couple's assets, once on May 28 of last year and again on September 28 . . .   Jayne, who appears on the current season of "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills," has maintained on the show that she didn't know about the lawsuits before filing to divorce Girardi in November.

    So Erika was subpoenaed to be deposed twice, in May and then again in September, two months before she filed for divorce and yet she knew nothing about lawsuits against Tom?  Bitch, please!  How many wives are subpoenaed to give depos about the assets they share with their husbands?  


    A day after the documentary premiered, Jayne's attorneys filed to withdraw as her counsel in Girardi's ongoing bankruptcy case, saying the "relationship of trust and confidence" had "broken down." However, two days later, Jayne's attorneys voluntarily withdrew that motion to withdraw as her counsel, according to Wednesday's court documents. 

    My guess is that the "relationship of trust" etc. is code for "the bitch didn't return our calls, didn't provide us with documentation and didn't listen to us so we're out."  The airing of the documentary probably has her running scared and so she finally listened to her attorneys, so they withdrew the motion to withdraw. 


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  15. 1 hour ago, Persnickety1 said:

    Article here

    Pretty interesting read.  

    Such disgusting greedy pigs, the both of them.  😡

    I wonder how many partners at Tom's firm knew about that $20 million loan?  

    Both Tom and Erika will have to answer to that loan in a bankruptcy hearing.  Tom won't be able to say he just gave his wife a $20 million loan.  He'll have to show documents, how it was going to be repaid, etc. and explain if there are no documents.  They will also have to explain exactly what that money was for and not just some vague reference to funding Erika Jayne and her "career."  

    How long before the other Ho'wives start being honest in their confessionals?  They are all being supportive of her at this point but surely once they hear the deets and realize what Tom and Erika have done, they will change their opinions.  

    These are some of the victims they stole from, who lost loved ones in a plane crash.  The money these folks should have received for losing a loved one instead went to fund Erika's monthly $40K glam squad bill. 



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  16. I agree that Samuel the cat is the best person on this shit show.

    Why on earth was Courtney lying behind a concrete divider in an empty parking lot in a pickle suit?  Did she think the image of a dead and slaughtered pickle was going to turn Josh on?  (Is that even his name?  I honestly am not sure because I'm not totally invested in anyone so far.) 

    So Doug has only been jail-free for 40 days?  40 DAYS.  Rachel, you need to have a Come to Jesus moment, stat.  What's the over/under on Doug being back in jail within a month of his release?  

    Yeah, Brittany, you made a bad situation worse by telling your family Ray wasn't going to be living with you.  I'm sure they'll never know!  (Especially since this is being filmed and all.)  

    If Stan did put Lisa in his will, he's more idiotic than Daonte.  As far as what's in his basement, I'm going to guess it's where previous toupees go to die.  Or it's where he has all those kinky sexcapades.  #SaveSamuel 

    Nicolle is never, ever going to sleep with Daonte.  Ever.  She'll keep collecting money and things while giving him an excuse.  Did they ever have any jail visits?  Is this the first time they've ever seen each other in the flesh?  I guess nothing says true love like an envelope full of money (and a pocket kitty named after you).  We need Daonte's friend's input on this immediately.  

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