filmgirl

I was 11 when this happened, so my memory could be fuzzy but I remember being VERY aware that Tiffani-Amber Thiessen was replacing Shannen. Like, Kelly Kapowski replacing Brenda Walsh was huge summertime gossip. Pretty sure there was TV Guide, Entertainment Weekly and even like Seventeen magazine coverage on it. Maybe even the Teen Beat shit too. IIRC, they promoed the hell out of it too. The fact that I was this aware of it probably says a lot about who I was then (and who I am now), but I'm pretty sure we all knew Brenda leaving for France was her last episode. So I'm not sure why they did such a fake out for the opening. I do vividly remember watching the premiere and being scandalaized that Kelly Kapowski would smoke pot. I love Val. I hated what they ended up doing to the character but it was so fun to have a main cast member who just didn't give a fuck about the gang. Was I the only one who immediately shipped Dylan/Val because she was brunette and it was agreed Kelly was the worst? Because I do remember shipping them immediately. It's next episode that we get TAT's first sex scene right?

I literally laughed out loud. I cannot wait until we get to Kelly's drug problem/rehab stint so that we can have the introduction of crazy Tara. Also, this season notwithstanding, Claire (where she was gross and terrible) was like the coolest character in the history of the show (I would say Gina but I think a lot of that is just me loving the actress on General Hospital and respecting her for being like "wow, this was a shitshow and a huge mistake. I want out of my contract so I can back to daytime). Which of course, is why she only lasted a few years.

I'm 1000% with you on Kelly being worse. Dylan is a total asshole. He's gross and deserves to be annexed. But Kelly was her BEST FRIEND. And that's the sort of betrayal that will fuck you up more than a dude cheating on you. Because you confide in your friends in a way totally different than the way you confide in your boyfriend/girlfriend. Like, it's just such a betrayal. And then to like lie to her after they did the whole "let's start dating thing" -- so she thinks the "competition" was actually something different than it was. When in actuality it was a rigged game the whole time. Which is why Brenda's rage read so real. SD's performance totally nailed that realization that hits you that people have been lying to you for a long time and you don't even get to the cry stage, you're just straight up angry. I just don't get how the show ever thought that Brenda, Kelly and Dylan could ever be in the same room together as "friends" ever again. Because that's just not happening. Like Kelly and Brenda are never going to be OK again. Ever. Such great television. Truly.

BEST END SCENE EVER. The amount of times I have quoted, "I hate you both, never talk to me again" in my actual life is insane. And it's especially insane because I was 10 years old when this aired. #TeamBrenda4Ever It's the rejoinder to end all rejoinders and sadly, I also think this is where we hit peak Brenda Walsh. Because for SD's remaining time on the show, Brenda was mostly mopey (though we can ALL relate to that Losing My Religion scene. Because who amongst us didn't listen to Vertical Horizon [insert whatever awful band was popular the year of your first terrible breakup here] while wallowing on your bedroom floor. Come to think of it, did I wallow because I saw Brenda wallow that way all those years earlier? Anyway -- all we got after this moment was mopey Brenda, Brenda who helps Kelly with her eating disorder (I still don't understand why she would even go to that bitch's birthday party, but whatever show), Brenda being mopey at the prom, Brenda going the University of Minnesota for A DAY, Brenda and Stewart (eww), Brenda maybe fucking her play director and Brenda saving animals by breaking into a lab. Lame. This was peak Brenda. It's all downhill from here.

Unpopular opinion: While I acknowledge that Donna's headband is fugly as all get out, I love the outfit as a total ensemble. Like,I love it. It's so Northern Exposure I just adore it.

Can we please talk about Doherty's eyebrows? Please? Because under bangs, they look fine. But they are so overplucked and tweezed that when she tries to do the no bang face thing, it really just looks bad. Who did this to her? Was ShanDo mean to hair and makeup?

I totally agree with you. I mean, I realize they can't show oral sex and excessive dry humping on the show, but it is weird that the show lives in a world where you are literally fucking or just making out. Also -- of course HE BANGED ANNE. He's Dylan and he gets to fuck whoever he wants without consequence (except maybe that girl in Paris...and I guess technically Toni tho I don't think that was a consequence of sex and just a consequence of her choosing to marry Dylan) because this show is centered around the idea that he is the ideal man. And it's why a generation of little girls grew up yearning for a bad boy, not realizing that this type of guy is just really the worst.

I'm so Team Brenda it's not even funny. I was back when I was 9 and in the 4th grade. I still am 23 years later. Like, I remember actually getting into fights with other little girls on the school bus over Kelly/Dylan or Brenda/Dylan. It was peak teen soap love triangle (until Dawson/Joey/Pacey). And Dylan/Brenda/Kelly is so much worse than Dawson/Joey/Pacey because they fucked around BEFORE the breakup. Like, it's one thing to break up and then ask out another friend in the group. It's gross and you should probably wait a few weeks first before doing so (especially if you're going after YOUR BEST FRIEND'S BOYFRIEND, KELLY), but whatever, it happens. It winds up sucking hardcore for one person, but it happens. But like, when you go behind your friend's back with the boyfriend, you are a trash person. The boyfriend is clearly the scum of the earth (though 9 year old me was still totally Team Luke Perry) and should be cursed with losing his money and his wife to a mobster in the future, but the best friend is also just the absolute worst. Like, part of the reason I could never deal with the retconned "Kelly Taylor is saint" bullshit of 90210: College Years and beyond was this moment. Still, I totally understand how/why the friends basically chose Kelly over Brenda. She's OG WBev and Brenda is still an outsider. And she's Steve's ex (not that Brenda and Steve ever liked each other anyway), David's stepbrother, and Donna's fellow spoiled rich bitch. But for her own brother not to care? That's some bullshit. You do have to wonder how the gang would have reacted had they all known explicitly that Dylan and Kelly just-the-tipped all summer while Brenda was in Paris. Donna, anyway, might have been like "yeah, fuck you" -- but I still see Brenda getting the short shaft. My second-favorite line happens next episode, Brenda: "Well my mother always told me 'if it looks like a duck and talks like a duck,'" Kelly: "Go to hell Brenda!" And now we're just a long Christmas and "Have You Ever Had to Make Up Your Mind" montage away from the greatest 90210 line ever, "I hate you both, never talk to me again!" Brenda stomp off. God, this show. I live for it.

Like Brenda, she totally kept at it. Unlike Jim and Cindy, she did not get sent to Paris. But just like Jim and Cindy, my parents were like "whatever, there are bigger problems in the world than this asshole" to stay continuously perturbed.

Kelly, David and Donna visited Jake on Melrose and he was basically too busy being ass-grabby with Amy Locane's character (Sandy? She was written out halfway through that first season. She didn't matter) to care about her. I do firmly remember watching this whole thing play out as a 9 year old, very much confused by how it took Jim and Cindy TWO MONTHS to figure out Brenda was still seeing Dylan. My older sister tried some of that stuff when she was told not to date some asshole dude and my parents caught on quick.