Steph J

Lois: "I see something, I say something." Okaaaaay? So, what's the problem because that's what Nina did and it sent a criminal to prison for a crime.

Lol at Angie's slack jawed "whaaaaat?" face at dinner. She thought they were just going to have a meal with a side of the usual fighting, not a fourth wall demolishing takedown. This episode was worth the wait, but is there anywhere for the series to go from here now that the online "fan" culture has so explicitly invaded the onscreen product?

Sorry Kristen, but "I'm the one who's still married" isn't exactly a flex when what you're married to is Josh Taekman, a gangrenous toe grown to human size.

Other than Sonny and maybe Laura and Lucy, who would she interact with outside the Quartermaine bubble? I think the only other characters currently on the canvas who were around when Sofer's Lois was last on the show are Felicia, Mac, Alexis, Kevin, Elizabeth, and Carly - and may I please say how grateful I am that there has not been a scene of Carly bitching to Lois about Nina under the guise of being concerned about Sonny because I had been bracing myself for that. I don't think there really was a "point" (by which I mean something plotted out by the writers with a beginning, middle, and end) to Lois' return. I think TPTB realized that there was an opportunity to bring Sofer back for a brief stint and that such an opportunity was unlikely to come again given that she's moving to the East Coast, so they brought her back more or less just to have her back. Her being seemingly stuck at the Quartermaine mansion is probably because they block filmed all her scenes in whatever short span of time she was willing to give them.

Is there a more dangerous combination of words than "We should play a game"?

Maybe Denise had a drink before coming? Was it in one of those glasses that's so big it can fit the contents of an entire bottle of wine? Yikes.

I swear, if I ever see a sprinter van in real life, I'm running in the opposite direction. After so many seasons of Housewife shows, that location is the equivalent of something out of a horror movie to me now.

IRL both of their dates of birth were fudged on their marriage contract (her age was reduced and his increased), so that might actually have been accurate to what was on the contract, even though it's not accurate to the facts. I had really high hopes for the movie, but left kind of underwhelmed. In general, I think movies that depict historical figures who had very eventful lives are better served by picking one particular episode and going in depth on it than by trying to capture everything, because you ultimately just end up bouncing from event to event without much context and without really exploring anything. It's also a very weird (albeit very Hollywood) choice to cast someone as Josephine when she's two decades younger than the actor playing Napoleon, particularly if you're going to depict him as having mommy issues that play into his marital relationship.

Not Monica using her bonnet to create a cryangle! I'm at the point where I can't decide if Monica is sincerely this all over the place, or if this is all performance art. And now we know that if you want to get an apology out of Lisa all it takes is the threat of a vacation being cancelled.

Given how little Juan cares, it's amazing that Robyn got even this small concession from him. I can't believe Ashley showed up to a christening in that dress. I mean, good God, woman, you can put them away every once in a while.

She is also rid of the ass she had when she was with Scottie, so I guess no one wanted it. But, seriously, she sucks. She sucks so much. Maybe she should talk to Erika Girardi about getting empathy lessons.

Michael Darby has probably been watching that part on a non-stop loop since it aired. That's Dr. idiot housewife.

Ashley is such a snake, and she's so dumb and messy about it that I don't understand how she keeps getting away with it.

Someone should suggest that she have some bread. Maybe she'll calm down a little.

"I don't think she likes me." ... You've got to think about this??? Mary is not a subtle person. I feel quite certain that at some point, on screen or off, she has straight up said to Whitney, "I don't like you, little girl."

"I don't have anything to say right now." Thanks for coming out Charrisse. A+ contribution as ever. Also, lol at Giselle pretending that it's just Ashley and Charisse who can understand Robyn's situation from experience.

Starting the season with 5 minutes of bullshit from Robyn and Juan was... a choice. I hope this doesn't mean that we're going to spend the whole season on this subject because this is the most boring "scandal" ever. Like, extra extra, man known for cheating cheats again, doormat partner looks the other way like she always does. Yawn.

Monica had the cash for the downpayment, but didn't have the credit to get the loan, so it went into her mom's name because she had the credit. Just a guess. Given that he would have to come home to Lisa, I think he'll stick it out.

E15 and 16 were two hours of nothing. I've sat through some bad reunions before, but I've sat through them. I didn't even bother to pause these ones when I got up to do something else for a few minutes.

Erin and Sai really thought they were going to successfully "No I didn't" their way through this. I feel like half these reunion episodes have just been the editors stepping in with flashbacks like, "Actually..."

I think this part goes without saying at this point.

For real. Ron Hale's Mike spent the 1990s as Sonny's punching bag. He never had to do more than walk into a room for Sonny to be nasty to him. I'm finding it kind of hard to work up the motivation to watch the day's episode lately, mostly because I know that a hurricane of bullshit is coming once Nina's "misdeed" is exposed and I'm dreading it. The only thing I'm tuning in for right now is Lois, but I'll be damned if I'm not going to fast forward through a Lois scene where Chase and Brooklyn are singing a song.

It's an Erin specific spin on the pejorative term "Karen." Erin is a "Karen," which makes her Kerin.

Ubah betting $1,000 that Erin was the one who told Brynn that Sai called her a slut. The way I cackled. It was very hag-like. Erin also thinks she's funny and denies having done/said things that we literally saw happen on camera. I think it's safe to say that her capacity for self-assessment is low.

Erin is "tough as nails"? Erin is a rich girl who talks tough because she's accustomed to being around people who won't challenge her. The second someone stands up to her, she collapses. She wouldn't last a second head to head with a housewives MVP.