vintagesac

Danielle is LOVING hearing that Bert is very insecure and jealous about the search for a third wife 😆 That little man who stays at home while his wives work is so funny. I’m glad they enjoy his telling them what he learned in sixth grade when his moms get home.

This is one guilty pleasure show that I never pay attention to, it’s so pathetic! I am also liking Florian this season. His face alternates quickly between ghoul and model. There really are some points where he looks very modely, but then he bugs out his eyes, or moves his chin back, and it’s gone. As for Darcey, I was trying to think of what type of man could stand to spend the day with this endless pit of neediness, and couldn’t think of any except someone without a mastery of the English language. She can’t ever put into words what it is that she wants, and only speaks in motivational memes. Every sentence she utters could appear with a background of a sunset. “I am a strong, beautiful woman who deserves love.” Blech 🤮

My husband looked at the TV, saw Darcy, looked disgusted, and said, “God, what’s wrong with her lip?” I think he thought I was watching a show about medical emergencies 🤣

I forgot how cringey everything they do was over the break. Darcy is the most insecure human I have ever seen. “Do you love me? Do you love me? Do you love me?” This isn’t something you need to ask 48 hours into being engaged. Stacy needed to leave during that fake “modeling” shoot with Lurch. She was so extremely obnoxious, pretending she was a stylist for five minutes with their “House of 11.” I really do not have any idea what they do for a living, but they both need to go shopping for some larger clothes. It’s like their entire wardrobe is from 2008 and 30 lbs. ago.

This is all I could picture with Stan in his velvet jacket, talking about intimate times, his beady old eyes gleaming. He really squicks me out. I totally agree about Daonte being on the spectrum. I hope he gets rid of blondie quickly, before she sucks any more money and gifts out of him. This new lady, Anissa, she’s this season’s Angela. I think her dude will show up and make her life Hell.

You know Rachel is just Rachel Dratch in disguise 😆 what was all that mugging for the camera? Her house looks nice, engineers make really good money, what does she need to be trolling the prisons for? Brittany is pretty and probably just trying to shock her parents for some reason. I thought Daonte was so sweet and innocent until he over shared. Larry and that pelt on his head is going to be comedy gold. I like his pals thinking, “This old fool!” Can you imagine him bringing his new girl to the buffet to meet the golden years crew? Pickle lady gives off a vibe that she should be looking for a wife. Maybe she needs to be honest with herself instead of trying to pin down hubby #4, who sounds like such a catch! Were there any people I missed? I don’t care about any of them yet...

Absolutely. He sounded exactly like my dad and that’s why we haven’t spoken in 20 years (I have actually tried). It’s definitely abusive and Brandon needs to get out of there before he repeats that crap with his kids someday.

Also, back to Garlic, when he was talking about his plans, he said he expects Bert and Danielle to both help with the business. I’m sorry, but Bert can’t even cobble together a full sentence in English. She wouldn’t even be able to translate for Spanish speaking clients. What the heck is she going to do other than hug people, cry, and steal yo’ man?

Oooh weee, does production hate Garlic as much as we do? They really focused on his slack-jawed dumb ass face for long periods of time. The thing with Dannielle’s parents welcoming Bert almost softened my cold heart. She looks like she lost weight. I don’t get anything this family does, they’re so hyper religious, yet they drink like fish and the women prance around the teen sons in skimpy bikinis? I hope Christie was super excited to get her own dumb bindi 🤣 Their kids are all so adorable and do look like one big family.

What if he’s really the brother of Joel Osteen, and they’ve banished him, but still give him a monthly allowance to stay away, because he interpreted the Bible all wrong 😇😂

I think Danielle set up the idea for the whole family to come along as a test. SURELY a man of God wouldn’t be able to bang his Brazilian knowing his entire family, including in-laws, were mere inches away. He will then realize it was all a bad idea, and go back to his family. Of course, we know this two pump chump would bang her in front of everyone if the voice of God told him it was okay.

Because he’s a mouth-breathing Troglodyte.

If that dumb dumb Snowden took me out on our second “real” date, only to drive me around blindfolded back to the backyard I have been trapped in for the past year, he would have gotten a very loud NO from me. Cheap ass. Anyone see a strong resemblance between Garlick and Danielle’s dad? Wow, they just looked like a older version of the couple. He needed to shut his trap about Berta while they celebrated their 13th anniversary. Well, 12th, because you stop counting after you get divorced. I think the King should just keep his family the way it is. Everything is working well, why ruin it? Sideon and crying Squeaky Fromme just killed me. So dramatic, grow up.

That stupid Garlic wants to hurry up and give Bert a baby before marriage? What? So what was the point of the divorce if he can’t even keep his thing in his girly pants long enough for her to get to the US? This is too messy and I love it. Why can I see Lovehandles (Siddeon’s girl) going all crazy like a Manson follower if the camping girl decides not to go with them? She really seems like there’s a simmering craziness behind her eyes. She’s too eager to say, “I know this isn’t a reaction a REGULAR girlfriend would have.” No, it’s not. I couldn’t care less about King and Marge Simpson, and Howdy Doody has such an unattractive high pitched voice.

So sick of everyone except Jovi and Yara that I found myself doing chores through the whole thing. I know Natalie is nuts, but Mike just takes his manipulation to new levels. Who the hell does he think he is, telling her to stop talking and leaving whenever something makes him the least bit uncomfortable? Then to tell HER to apologize when he’s the big baby Huey who left her there. Then standing there like King Oaf and saying maybe you’ll forgive her tomorrow? I know weird Mommy told him he’s a prize, but judging by his early pics, he’s always looked like a rashy, angry Paul Bunyon. Yes, like the bunyon on a foot. As for the other mismatch, Brandon and Julia...he is a smirking, ridiculous little puppet who his witch of a mom turned into a “real boy,” but Julia really flipped, didn’t she? In what world should someone erase their memories of a time before her? She’s not only jealous, but that’s some narcissistic crap right there. She really needs to “go Russia.”