abbottrabbit

Oz is closing. . . https://dc.eater.com/2019/6/25/18758569/oz-restaurant-closing-clarendon-real-housewives

I don't know how business is doing, but they were actually recommended in Eater's DC newsletter a couple of weeks ago as a place you could get a last minute reservation for a good mother's day brunch. So. . . not so good that they weren't booked up for brunch by the Thursday before Mother's Day, but good enough that they got a recommendation? Also, did we not see the sister she has the hair business with at all in this episode? I'm assuming if you have 90 bridesmaids, your sister / business partner is one of them, but she never seemed to be one of the ones comforting her or anything. And we got name credits for the mother, father, stepdad, and brother lovechild, but I don't remember seeing the sister at all. Is THAT what happened? I freaked out a little bit when I couldn't find it in the list on the main page with the other RH shows, especially since Vulture seems to have stopped recapping it too (I know it's not the best housewives, but it's one of only 2 I still watch).

I was folding laundry while watching, so I only saw the cake and a REALLY sad looking little salad. Like two lettuce leaves with a slice of tomato on top. Last week when they showed pictures of Candiace's parents back in the day, Dorothy looked SO MUCH like Candiace. Chris has already seen the face he'll be waking up to in his golden years if he sticks around that long. Yeah, it's not my thing, but it definitely fits with what we've seen of Chris's style, so it's nice that he and his groomsmen got to dress in accordance with his tastes. At least he got to pick SOMETHING at that wedding.

But all the grandparents have become U.S. citizens, right? So they've renounced their Italian citizenship, meaning the girls don't qualify through them.

I don't want to give Joe and/or Theresa too much credit (and I feel like giving them credit for any kind of foresight is already too much), but is there any chance he retained his Italian citizenship so the girls would be or would have the option of being dual citizens? (I say this as someone who would kill for a second passport, and has looked into the requirements for Italian citizenship -- my understanding is you can qualify as long as a great-grandparent or more recent relative was born in Italy, and your most recent Italian-born ancestor didn't renounce)

I need the next reunion to feature an inset of Delores's face doing reactions at all times. They can cut to Jen for the moments when she realizes that for all her judgments about adultery, she's aligned herself with a former stripper and <cough> call girl who has a sex tape on Porn Hub.

God, I really hope it's because they're doing some sort of intervention.

We used to have a priest who said "The Jews may have invented guilt, but the Catholics perfected it."

If we get to claim titles based on being related to the holders pre-1481, then you can all call me the queen of motherfucking England. (styled HRMFH) (sharing the title with 80% of people of British ancestry is a drag, but it keeps the workload a bit lighter) Over-under on the duration of her latest sham marriage?

It's something I saw a ton of from my grandparents' generation; less so from my parents'. I'd thought it was an age thing, but I think Giacinto is actually younger than my mom. So maybe it's a "degrees removed from immigration" thing. The best part is, if Joe was over at Theresa's helping Giacinto out 24/7/365, the rap would be "your brother, he thinks I'm old; he thinks I can't do for myself no more; he don't trust me!"

Lordt. Apparently the rich dick she tripped over this time belonged to the boyfriend of her best friend and Jillian's boss. https://urldefense.proofpoint.com/v2/url?u=https-3A__allaboutthetea.com_2019_02_27_daniel-2Dstaubs-2Dnew-2Dboyfriend-2Dbreaks-2Doff-2Dfling_&d=DwIFAg&c=E2nBno7hEddFhl23N5nD1Q&r=EJGTTQ28zfNxtchNwvYiDg&m=_w7RfW8UF5oOfW-8iohm5KL3iwdhFYrgCMrpa_mn80k&s=kSRzM4_thj7ibNoK_fHxAFqeyBdTWeFuXr4O-VbG6iI&e=

I would adopt your cousin. I hadn't thought of Port-o-Subs in 20 years until I saw it written there, and now I'm craving it. 100% yes. I had a wife and was working to build my business while he was out doing crimes and spending his money on "boats and hooers" (TM Frank Catania). It is an old Italian classic, the martyred parent act. Seen more commonly, but not exclusively, from the mother, but Giacinto is making it his own. "Your brother never comes over! Your sister doesn't appreciate all I do for her!" Neither Theresa nor Joe is actually falling for it, she's just seizing on it as an easy knife to twist. Her ass was in danger of falling off, and that brave fan stepped in to save it.

I am mad as hell at the universe that this trick gets to be publicly batshit crazy and yet apparently trips over rich dick on the street (FUCKIN' ENGAGED... NINETEEN TIMES!!!! table flip), whereas I'm back here working, paying my bills, being good to my family and perpetually single.

I immediately thought "yeast infection waiting to happen." My second thought was that oof, I guess she's not planning to do a second fitness competition?

Elia won a breakfast on the beach challenge in Season 2 using a frozen waffle (and having copied said breakfast myself: she deserved it), so Eggo or its Whole Foods branded equivalent isn't always a bad approach. And there have been a couple of times when chefs in the bottom group tried to defend themselves by tearfully saying things like "I wanted to make my own pasta so I could be sure it was up to my standard," and Tom or a guest judge cut them down by saying they'd rather have good premade pasta than bad fresh. The snooty purity about premade ingredients not being wuuuuuurthy of use on Top Chef is entirely situational -- they'll ding you for it if your dish is in the bottom, but praise you for "making it your own" if it's in the top. That said: I do not like Sarah and I think she overreacted. But I would have punched Adrienne in her face if I'd been there (even if I hadn't been the one she pulled that on; even if I'd been on her team). That smug little grin and her sleepy eyes, doing a bad job pretending she didn't understand why anyone was upset, using that insincere, syrupy voice and cutesy nicknames. Barf.

THANK YOU. I was wondering the same thing -- I'm assuming they did, or they would have pulled it out as a surprise at some point in the episode, but unless there's some compelling reason Felicity's mom KNEW-knew that it was her lover and not her husband (e.g. Huffman being away at the necessary time), it seemed like taking a lot for granted. And I also found it kind of a snooze after last week, which I found really disappointing both b/c I think they're both such tremendous actors, and the set up of them both not knowing much about their fathers had potential. My favorite moment was Felicity reenacting her mom telling her, in the bath, smoking, calling her "Flicka." (I also wanted some background about her mother -- FH was born in 1962, and her dads were born in 1910 and 1912... so was she a double "oops" baby [oops, I thought we were done and oops, I was having an affair] or was her mother quite a bit younger than both men?).

We've seen Rails so much the last few years, it's starting to make me miss The Brownstone.

I don't for a second believe that that paper copy of the Record, splayed out on Frank & Delores' kitchen island looking like it had been hand ironed by the underbutler at Downton Abbey, was delivered by any paperboy other than the production company. They probably all knew about it beforehand because they all have google alerts set up for each other's names; they just had the Catanias and Jennifer walk through the amateur dramatics of that "reveal" scene for storyline purposes.

I've been thinking about this, because at the moment it seems like there are two "games" (to torture an analogy a bit) and four "teams" in play this season: In the "We're Mad at Jackie" Bowl, it's definitely Teresa and Jennifer as captains of team 1, with Delores playing whatever the position is that just tees the ball up for the kickers to kick. Jackie, Melissa, and Marge are team 2, with Marge mostly riding the bench. Jackie is also the ball. In the "Crazy Danielle" Bowl, it's definitely going to be Team Danielle versus Team Margaret. Teresa is obviously going to be on Team Danielle; Delores will end up team Marge in this one. Jackie will probably end up TM; Jennifer will blindly follow Teresa onto TD. Melissa is a wild card. It will be interesting to see how the overlapping / conflicting alliances play out.

Margaret seems to have learned her lesson BUT GOOD about Danielle. I don't follow any Housewives on twitter, but I read Margaret's feed during every commercial of a NJ episode because her Danielle jabs are <chef's kiss> perfection.

No! I kept watching after the two stragglers showed up at the photo shoot (one of whom ALSO left her pants on, ala Marge), and they never said who they were. I do think that one of them was pointed out as being a sister-in-law, but I thought she said "my sister-in-law through my [???]" So maybe the wife (widow?) of a brother, or the sister of the girls' dad, or Marty's sister. . .? Who knows. I did think it was quality shade of Bravo to caption Marty's kids, underlining the fact that neither of them were in the wedding party. Did Marty have ANYONE standing up with him?

Well. . .three co-workers, two daughters. . .so only 4 friends. Still. More than I'd expect for her.

I've been told (and this could just be something the women in my family tell each other so we feel better about our under-eye area) that people from Mediterranean cultures have thinner skin under their eyes to begin with, so you get the purple effect from the veins showing through, and it crepes faster than the rest of your face as you age. Honestly, as someone 4 or 5 years younger than Theresa, I'm comforted by the idea that even dropping that much dough wouldn't entirely keep them at bay -- now I know there's not some pricey secret I'm missing out on (all the women in my family have them starting in their late 40s; the heavy drinkers get them so bad that they wake up every morning looking like they've just lost a prize fight)

Danielle seems to have way outdone Bethanny's mother in terms of raising not one, but two daughters who can comport themselves with any sort of decorum. But who knows -- maybe as they grow up, they'll turn into exhausting attention seekers who communicate solely in screams and recycled '90s frat humor.

Isn't it also the franchise with the most kids who've done the most growing up on the shows? Tamra's youngish kids got yanked from OC when she divorced Simon, and the other wives there with youngish kids were only on for a handful of seasons. In NY, Ramona and LuAnn's kids were all teens when the shows started; Alex & Simon got axed while their sons were young; Heather, Aviva, and Jules only lasted a couple of seasons each, and Sonja & Bethenny's exes won't let their kids on. But in NY, Teresa's youngest was born in the second season, and Melissa's have been on since Gino's baptism, and their other kids were elementary age or younger. Now Gia's bloody driving, Antonia, Gabriella, and Milania are young women, and the Gorga boys are at least old enough to have personalities.