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Mhl2016

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  1. I went to high school with John and his wife, so I tuned in to see how well they captured the atmosphere, and I really think they nailed it. The school was a actually a bit more rustic (my husband referred to it as “a shitbox” the first time I took him to visit), but overall, that was really what it was like, especially my first year there, which was when John was a senior.
  2. I find it interesting how much of what we see watching the show is through our own past experiences, which seems really obvious, but never really struck me so much as with the Metul stuff. I thought he seemed awkward at first at the gym, but the night of Indian cooking and at the store, my husband and I both commented on how much more real and comfortable their relationship seems than hers with Craig ever did. He was teasing her and it didn’t seem overly harsh to me. Good natured teasing is a sign of a healthy relationship. Some people have thicker skin than others, so the teasing just has to be at the right level for each individual. Plus, he said diabetes, which in the context, I think most people assume he meant type 2, which does probably have a little to do with diet, and he said it casually, not in a medical setting talking to a patient. I hear that sort of thing all the time. Finally, my husband and I are good friends with most of our exes, and we would never have a problem with traveling with those, but when an ex is constantly denigrating your current relationship and talking about lack of closure, that would be concerning. Her relationship with Craig always seemed much more upsetting to me even before they broke up, and he’s still clearly unstable. If I were Naomie, I would absolutely not want to be stuck in a house with him, and if I were Metul, I wouldn’t want my girlfriend there either.
  3. I think this might be a long one. I'm happy for Shari and Javen. Even the first episode I knew they weren't going to break up, but I thought it was because they were too codependent. However, they ended up growing as people and as a couple and I think probably have a good future ahead of them. Nicole and Karl were weird. There was a lot of talk about the age gap, which I just don't think is that big of a deal once you're out of school. My husband and I were the exact same ages as those 2 when we first met, and it was never an issue. And even if it were, I've always believed that the age gap says much more about the maturity of the older person in the relationship than the younger partner. Karl seemed really controlling, and I feel like he might have used the age gap as leverage. Kady and John-- I'm glad it's over for both of them. Kady is really insensitive and doesn't even seem to feel guilty for some of the things she said, which I just don't understand. I also don't understand wanting some alpha man to parent your children rather than a caring, nurturing, loving partner. But John let himself be emasculated for years, so... I think they were just a bad match, and I don't necessarily see Kady being a cheater in a relationship with the right match for her. She sucked on this show, but lots of people suck when they're unhappy in a relationship. That brings me to Evan/Kaci/Morgan. They obviously also had a bad relationship, but even outside of the relationship, I really don't think Evan is a good guy. Unlike Kady, I think he is going to cheat again-- it's his nature. And while Kady was not awesome, she just doesn't bother me as much--maybe because her perspective on life is just so far removed from anyone I know. I have known Evans before, and they suck. when the show first started, I found Kaci really annoying. I started listening to the podcast just to hear the behind the scenes scoop and hoping I could tolerate listening to her voice. But she seemed fairly nice and a little more grounded than I thought, so I felt guilty for finding her so annoying (but still found her pretty annoying). BUT then Evan had his turn to come on, and it changed my entire perspective on how I watch the show. He was just a jerk. Angry and evasive and unwilling to acknowledge any kind of responsibility for his actions. I disliked him so much that it made me root for Kaci. And his behavior since then hasn't changed my opinion. His ability to gaslight and turn it around so that somehow Kaci is the bad guy is astonishing to me. And his whole speech about not wanting her to blame Morgan made it seem like Kaci had been some horrible slut shamer, which is not at all accurate--at least not publicly. Plus, from the articles posted here and a few others I've read, he and Morgan are really trying to make Kaci look bad, which I do not understand at all. She has just been completely humiliated (mostly by her own doing, mind you. That final bonfire, oi!) on a national stage. Just let it go. Don't try to rub it in and make her look worse just because you don't like being attacked on twitter and want to make yourself feel better. I haven't heard any of the latest podcasts, but Kaci was not mean about Evan at all on earlier podcasts. She was understandably a little taken aback, but she hasn't made any real personal attacks beyond just explaining her reactions at the time of filming (maybe she did after the finale? please correct me if I'm wrong), and she didn't say anything bad about Morgan at all. I was glad about that because I hate when women blame the other woman for the cheater's choices. And I don't necessarily believe that Morgan did anything wrong, but I do think it's weird, just as a human being, that she never expressed any kind of sympathy that another person has to be hurt. For both Morgan and Evan to just pile it on shows me what kind of people they both are. They would come across a lot better if they just talked about their own love and happiness and just mentioned Kaci briefly--like wish her the best, sorry she got hurt, the end. Evan and Kaci were together for many years--of course she would have trouble letting go and need more closure beyond the bonfire conversation. She chose to stay for that long, that's on her, but anyone would need more than 3 weeks to get past a years long relationship that ended on national television in an unbelievably embarrassing and cringe-worthy way, no matter how bad it was. I also think when relationships start so young, you often don't develop mature ways of handling the break ups. Maybe I'll change my mind when I hear the latest stuff, but so far, I think Evan really sucks and Morgan kind of does too. As for Kaci moving on and not talking about Evan, I don't really think that's entirely fair. She's being interviewed specifically about this show and her relationship with Evan. What else is she supposed to talk about? That's the whole point of the interviews. Evan can at least talk about his new relationship. Kaci doesn't have that. And he and Morgan are also talking about wanting to go do more reality shows, which Kaci hasn't really expressed an interest in. I hope she is able to move on from this and learn, but in my opinion, she is obviously much better off without that loser.
  4. Here’s my question wrt Morgan and evan’s future if they stay together—what is going to happen with his family? Like, they’ve known Kaci for 10 years and she has seen him through the disappearance/death of his father and nursed him through a medical crisis and is probably a part of their family at this point. Since they (probably—I mean he is a pretty massive tool but he’s still family) love Evan and won’t want to blame him for what is obviously completely his fault, aren’t they basically just always going to see Morgan as a home wrecking whore (not my opinion of her at all, but how I think they will view it)? I just don’t see his family ever accepting her after all this. I do think their relationship will last as long as people keep bashing them on Twitter. Evan is the kind of immature loser who will think their us-against-the-world love is so deep and profound. Once it’s an actual steady relationship in the real world and no one cares about them anymore, he’s gonna get bored. He feeds off the drama. His creepy staring and pronouncements of their deep love is so high school, it’s painful to watch from an adult man. I truly cannot understand why either of those women would want such a loser. Oh, and Kady sucks.
  5. She did. It was brief, but she said something about it being a bad time in her life and having low self esteem and not being proud of it, that she’s good with that girl now, but that girl still doesn’t like Evan very much. Evan is just a turd. He’s immature, entitled and thinks of relationships the way high schoolers do. It’s frankly pathetic and weird, and I cannot understand Morgan being into it at all. I understand Kaci because she’s been with him since she was young and that can keep your blinders on longer than usual, but how can someone meeting him as an adult woman not see his behavior as the giant screaming red flag it is? He also apparently has spoiled the season multiple times on social media, so I can’t imagine the show is super happy with him now.
  6. Yes, I did not like Kaci the first episode at all. I thought she would for sure be my BEC, but after listening to her on the podcast, I’ve really come around on her. She seems a lot more aware and grounded than I originally thought, and she seems like a genuinely good person—wanting to give everyone the benefit of the doubt without being overly naive.
  7. Reality Steve has a podcast every Thursday and he devotes the last part of it to interviewing Kaci about the latest episode. Obviously, it’s Kaci’s perspective, but he did do 1 interview with Evan, who came across very poorly in his own telling of events—just dumb and making excuses and evasive. I would be more prone to give Kaci’s version of events the side eye if Evan hadnt come across so poorly in his own defense. As a warning if you want to listen, they don’t give away the ending, but it’s impossible not to read into what they’re saying. eta: this was just responding to dochielomn’s asking where I got the information. I know I’ve mentioned the podcast before and don’t want people to think I am, like, on reality steve’s payroll or something
  8. I definitely don’t subscribe to the notion of once a cheater, always a cheater. For instance, I dont think Kady is a cheater. She just doesn’t love John. And I don’t think Javen will cheat on shari again. He was young and away from home for the first time and getting attention from other girls for the first time. People can change and grow. However, I do think there are some people who are just cheaters by nature, and Evan is absolutely one of those guys. He has cheated on every girlfriend he has ever had. And I don’t think his relationship with Morgan is special. He apparently does this a lot—declaring this is a love like no other very early on and even moved in with a woman he barely knew only to move out 3 months later. He’s just a bad guy who has used his past tragedies and his “great love” as a cheap ticket out for bad and selfish behavior.
  9. As an argument both for and against Kathryn, I do have 2 friends who have each been approached for multiple reality shows, so they didn’t seek it out, but they both turned the offers down, so... one of those friends actually reminds me so much of Evan in terms of her outlook on relationships. Like, it’s not real love to her unless it’s butterflies and passion all the time. And she falls hard and fast, but the minute it’s a stable, healthy relationship, she’s bored. At one point, she started seeing the ex husband of another one of our friends, which was obviously quite scandalous. I just told that friend (the ex wife) to ignore it and act like it didn’t bother her at all. As long she (the ex wife) made a big deal out of it or let everyone else react to it, my friend (the drama queen) was going to see it as a challenge and like a Romeo and Juliet meant to be kind of love. And as soon as the ex wife stepped back, my friend got bored and dumped him. I think Evan is the same way with Morgan. He’s all about the shiny and new and magic of this experience, and if he and Morgan try to make it work outside of the island, he is going to fight for the relationship as long as people are attacking them on twitter or wherever. The minute the audience forgets about them and she moves to California to be with him, he’s going to get bored and move on to the next shiny object. Kaci is lucky to be rid of him, and I actually really believed her when she said she feels bad for Morgan. I think she knows that’s how he operates, and doesn’t blame the other woman.
  10. Evan and Kady are both awful. They both seem to have very immature outlooks on relationships. Evan cared more about what his boys thought than his girlfriend of 5 years, and he is also just...not bright. I’m sorry. I do not care how many deep talks you’ve had with someone while on a tropical vacation—you cannot actually be in love with someone until you have seen them IRL because you do not actually know them. Until you have seen them interact with their friends and family and waiters at restaurants, been with them after they’ve had a long, bad day at work, or been in the car with them in traffic or lost, you DO NOT KNOW them. And even if you WERE in love (which, again, they are not), normal people can wait to have sex for the measly 3 weeks it would have taken to get off the island and break up with his girlfriend. Also, I just want to push the reality Steve podcast again. It gives interesting background. Evan and kaci were allowed to do anything you would do on a first date—hold hands and a simple kiss, but no real make outs. According to kaci, Evan has always been drawn to drama. And Evan was very angry about Kaci’s proposal ultimatum and thought that there is nothing acceptable about giving ultimatums. Personally, I don’t see a problem with saying “I want to get married and have children soon. I want that to be with you, but if you’re not on the same page, we need to break up.” How is that unfair? He’s just a deeply selfish, self-centered person. Maybe he’ll grow out of that. But maybe not.
  11. I don’t think this is a spoiler, but I am going to put my response in spoiler tags, just in case:
  12. I don’t think this is a spoiler—in an earlier podcast, she said she wanted to do the show because she had a feeling that Evan wasn’t as invested as she was. Also, Evan didn’t just cheat on her once or twice in the past—He was a serial cheater on everyone he ever dated, which is why they were so off and on for the first 5 years, but she doesn’t think he cheated after everything that happened with his dad.
  13. Reality Steve does a podcast every Thursday and at the end he interviews kaci about the latest episode. This week he had Evan and Kaci. They try not to give spoilers, but it’s not hard to read into what they’re saying. Still, it’s interesting and makes kaci seem a lot more aware than she comes off on the show. If you’re into the show, I highly recommend it.
  14. I liked the engagement party venue just fine, but I am confused as to the necessity of this engagement party. I am approaching my 11th anniversary, so maybe times have changed, but we had a very casual engagement party at a dive bar thrown for us by friends. What they were planning seems more like a very nice rehearsal dinner. Is this elaborate engagement party a normal thing? Or just for tv? I feel bad for Scheana. Even the girls who are her “friends” treat her like an afterthought. I’d much rather room with her than Kristin.
  15. Does anyone think Haleigh and Tyler could end up hooking up outside the house? They both kind of had crushes on each other in the beginning. With the game out of the way, maybe? I don’t really see Tyler with Angela and Haleigh looks like she is just putting up with fessy most of the time. That’s what it looks like to me anyway. I’m not crazy about the fact that she didn’t make out with him until she got drunk on HOH wine.
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