JocelynCavanaugh

I don't think Rachel speaks clearly at all. She speaks haltingly and like forming every word is a chore that requires her full concentration. It's not just teacher-talk, not even special ed teacher talk. She sounds like she's having to re-learn to use that part of her brain after a traumatic injury. Not a joke: every time she launches into one of her crushingly obvious explanations, I instinctively reach to set her to 1.5x speed like I do with slow-talking podcasts. Always sad when I remember that's not an option. Bao, a 35-year-old woman with three broken engagements and a fresh divorce, looking like a "porcelain doll." LMAO never change, racism. Gil's mouth said he wants to stay with Myrla, but his strained grimacing and deflated energy told a different story. Sucks that there was still a reunion to look forward to but so much has been spoiled here anyway because tHe ShOW's oVeR... I skipped the last page and a half or so because I didn't want anything else ruined, so sorry if I duplicated anyone else's comments.

It's okay, everybody! I was mostly kidding! I need to change my avatar to a warning: when Jocelyn says sassy things, she's not being that serious so no need to take it that way! That said, I think Moriah has even told us on the show that she hates school and reading. Occasionally, those types turn into great teachers, but it's about as common as singers with voices like Bob Dylan's becoming superstars.

This feels like exquisite shade. 😂

I missed a lot of this episode because so much took place with Moriah’s treacly warbling in the background. Just couldn’t take it. It sounds like I didn’t miss anything important. It’s fine to make music because you enjoy it even if you’re not great. I just hope she doesn’t expect the entire community to play along. Moriah, you are no Rory Gilmore and Cairo is not Stars Hollow. They aren’t going to prop up your mealy mouthed aspirations. There are some famous examples of “bad” voices becoming beloved performers — Bob Dylan, Janis Joplin, Adam Duritz, Macy Gray, etc. — but I don’t think Moriah is charismatic enough to pull that off. Those I listed are/were captivating and self-possessed, and great lyricists, too. So… there’s also that. 😬

Mercy’s problem was “diagnosed” as soon as it occurred, when her eye was injured by a pice of plastic that flew off of something in the yard. She’s spent weeks in the hospital having multiple surgeries and the family has helped to work with her on rehabilitation exercises. Kim detailed it at length on their family blog. If she’s lying to make herself look good, it’s an elaborate and extremely detailed lie carried out over more than a year.

I’m truly glad he came out all of that okay, but this anti-medication message is so dangerous. Obviously the one prescription he tried didn’t work for him, but it’s normal to have to try several to find one that works. Some people never find one, and that is sad and frustrating. The right medications can help, though, because mental illnesses are usually related to brain chemistry. He’s right that we shouldn’t stigmatize mental illness, but we also shouldn’t stigmatize a treatment that does save thousands of people. It’s like advocating treating diabetes just with diet and telling people they don’t need insulin if they’re doing it right. Not always true and occasionally deadly.

Tiny women do tend to lean in to the “I’m sooooo tineeyyy” routine. I’m still uncomfortable with the Asian stereotypes that get thrown around here. I haven’t seen people making these kinds of claims about Myrla and Rachel’s Hispanic heritage, etc. It’s like the last acceptable group to write off as a monolith.

This show has gotten progressively worse about intentional bad matches for drama, but this season really takes the cake. You cannot tell me that with everybody involved in producing the series, not a single person noticed that Michaela has Serious Fucking Issues? That Johnny and Bao knew each other? That Ryan and Brett are nice people but also the walking embodiment of a donkey and elephant political cartoon? That José isn't str... anyway you get the point. The greatest trollery of the season is that Gil and Myrla, who were obviously paired with the expectation that they would despise each other, actually hit it off. Yes, Ryan's sister was definitely trying to give Brett a heads-up without totally selling him out. Maybe he hasn't even confessed anything to her, but she knows him well enough to put the clues together. Brett seemed to get the hint, but she probably feels like she can't win. If she brings it up, he will just accuse her of having "anxiety" and being too "emotional." There are things I like about Ryan, and I've been trying to read his demeanor as just super laid-back and not expressive, but he may really be a jerk. It's not fair to Brett. I don't even believe she was that "anxious" on the plane. He's just insulated himself from anyone who processes their emotions verbally. Or, like, at all. So when he's forced to live with one, he assumes there's something wrong with her. Bao is definitely benefiting from being in the shadow of the Hulk she's married to. Every week, I'm mad at Johnny for making me feel bad for her, because I really don't care for her cutesy/snob/cutesy nightmare personality and scrunchy faces. It keeps being like 80% "Johnny is a monster"/20% "Johnny makes a solid point." I don't understand how this woman who prizes "a great intellect" over an Astros jersey can be told to her face, like two weeks ago, that her husband is immensely turned off by the childish way she acts, and then conclude that a good strategy is to show up at a volleyball game dressed up and acting like bad* barely legal cheerleader pOrn. Zach sure seemed to enjoy it, though. Yikes. There are a million problems with Johnny, but I will never fault him, a grown ass adult, for being attracted to adults. Or for being thin or wearing pink. Men should not be dragged for that in 2021, FFS. Plenty of actually horrible stuff to drag him for. *It's all bad. The concept is bad. In pOrn and on MAFS.

I thought so, too. When Rachel and José were leaving for the honeymoon, she swatted condoms out of his hand and said something about "you don't make babies that way!" Plus, as someone mentioned earlier, Michaela asking Zach about kids the second they met. But if any of them would rather have vacations than kids, who cares? It's better for society when motherhood is an opt-in activity and children are wanted.

She's been nearly immobilized by back pain for a while. That may have something to do with it. I like this show better when there's more Todd and Towel, some Ashley, maybe 2 seconds of Heather, and a lot of Whitney's adorable pets. Despite the bizarre accusations I've seen online, I think she is actually a pretty good pet owner. The poodle is a high-strung breed AND a rescue. It probably doesn't want to be snoozled all the time like Whitney does to the cats. Anyway, those are the fun parts. I can take or leave Buddy, who clearly doesn't want to be there, the father-daughter fitness team, and all the dead-end romances. Can we please stop with the "French man" nonsense already? He's bad at this. He's lame. I don't want him to come on the trip. I want the trip to be about Todd making fun of everyone, like all trips should be. The medical stuff is boring, too. I don't like medical story lines on any show -- especially about boring whiny fertility shit -- and I don't spend a lot of time obsessing about whether story lines are "sCriPTeD" and "pRodUCeR SHenANigANs" because that's exhausting and kills the fun, but... even I am not willing to sit here and believe that Whitney is genuinely planning to use those eggs. Why? How? No one needs this. I love most of the garbage TLC dumps onto my TV, but I wish they would stop forcing the mommy bullshit narrative onto every female person they cast. Women can do other things! Like start offering dance classes for big women, or start a clothing line about fat acceptance, or start a fitness business with one person or another, or start converting to Judaism, or start painting, or start learning French, or start studying to be a personal trainer... There's all kinds of things to halfheartedly dabble in!

I've always suspected that Kim was the reason for the vast majority of toxicity in the family and this episode underscored that. Barry has his problems for sure, but he doesn't spend time devising ways to wield sneaky, weird power over his children. I think he is more awkward and weak than calculating or malicious. All of this perseverating and plotting over Moriah and her treacly nothing music and cringey makeup choices. I try to avoid regional stereotypes but is there seriously nothing better to do in south Georgia?

Bringing Luka on for drinks in the messy galley with strangers was so weird. Like, hey, we definitely didn't work with you and we're about to go out for fun without you, but super glad you could stop by. Clearly production just needed footage of Luka entering the galley and Mat throwing a hissy fit about it so they could air it in previews and trick viewers. Fun system, enjoyed it so much. The caginess about what happened in Split was silly. After a whole season of watching this group get wasted, the guys constantly injuring themselves and/or crying, and the girls going to bed without them, you expect me to believe they had a Chef Mat Orgy under the moonlight at Diocletian's mausoleum? LOL it is infinitely more likely that Delaney reappeared to tell them facts about Diocwetian and the Twiumviwate in the Late Woman Empiwe.

According to a source that spoke with The Sun, Josh’s brothers and sisters are allegedly beginning to “have doubts” even while Jim Bob allegedly continues to work hard to prove Josh’s innocence. The source notes Jim Bob is “working hard behind the scenes to get him off,” adding, “he’s setting up meetings, paying lawyers and consultants, doing whatever he can to make sure his son doesn’t go to jail.” Nothing in the reporting around this has actually indicated that JB believes Josh is “innocent”; he’s just tying to keep him from going to federal prison. Josh definitely deserves it but JB is probably motivated by pride/fear of public shame and maybe wanting to protect his horrid son. I suspect the older sisters never had much trouble believing Josh was capable of all kinds of sick and destructive behavior.

I'm from Texas and I'm on an academic schedule. Nothing here is new info to me! But even in the summers that I don't get to bop off to Europe, I don't put myself on house arrest and make my husband suffer. It wouldn't even occur to me to approach summer that way, even though I fucking despise hot weather. Rachel's apparent inability to self-soothe is what's concerning.

True... but we have yet to see Bao excuse herself to a private room to make wounded zebu noises. That could just be editing, though.

Johnny and Bao have me trapped in their dysfunctional cycle: Johnny is an unreasonable jerk. However, Bao does exaggerate or play up the martyrdom thing, which is annoying. She is really too old to act like this. So Johnny isn't totally unreasonable. He's definitely a jerk, but he does have a point. But then he starts ballistic arguments about nothing. It's unfair to Bao. How is she supposed to handle that? But how does she handle it? Like a pouty baby cartoon, cuddling herself and making dopey eyes at the camera. Spare me, Elmyra! But Johnny is awful. Definitely the worse of the two. But I get what he means about her doing things that he doesn't ask for and then being a martyr about it. Bao may do the laundry and meal-planning because acts of service are her "love language" or whatever, but if Johnny has flat-out told her he DFAG and she keeps doing it, then that's on her. But he shouldn't be so mean about it. But when he throws his tantrums, why does she try to touch and nuzzle on him? She is the ostensible source of his rage! On Unfiltered, she gave a whole speech about how when Johnny is having his rage strokes, it's all on her to hold them both together. She must be their shelter from the storm. She's just a poor, lonely soldier out there in the rain, carrying them both on her tiny, little, girly, baby back. Mew hew. It Is So Sad. They are both jerks! He is Huge Danger Jerk, she is Sexy Newborn Baby Jerk. Both! Jerks! Bao will absolutely keep sleeping with him, because she has already announced to the cameras that she does not intend to give up. This is about winning. Johnny has conditioned himself to keep swiping. He plays women like nickel slots. He'll never be satisfied. For any 90DF crossover people, this strongly reminded me of Tania fighting with Syngin and taking her brai plate to bed with her. Girl was mad, but not too mad for that meat!

Maybe, but Bao is American. We also want to be careful about infantilizing or exoticizing Asian women or people as a whole. Japan has a kawaii subculture but they also have plenty of young people who act like adults. Japan and Korea are also really different from Vietnam and Thailand in a lot of ways.

I guess I wasn’t clear; I wasn’t implying that she shouldn’t want to go to Europe. It’s just a little troubling that she seems to think her options are “Europe” or “stuck in José’s house all day.” She acted like there were literally no other options for her summer. Her processing speed worries me. If we’re being chased by javelinas, we only have to outrun Rachel, apparently. It’s strange to me when there are people in education who are so lacking in creativity or seeing possibilities in a situation. That’s usually an important skill in our world. Maybe she was trying to explain some other aspect of the problem but she couldn’t quite get there since the show is only two hours long.

I've never warmed up to Bao; I have always found her to be a bizarre mix of pretentious and babyish, and I think Johnny is probably at least a little right that she's fake around other people. Her "bol-yon-aze" looked like runny Pad Thai. But after this episode, there's no denying that Johnny is one truly messed-up individual. When he went from zero to Hulk in 2 seconds, did he think that viewers would agree with his rage? Did he realize cameras were still there? He's scary and weird. I can't decide if Bao is delusional, stubborn, or a world-class troll for sticking with him. I've never thought they were a match. Asian is not a compatibility trait. But I promise I won't say I told you so. 😁 Ryan is the other page in the Choose Your Own Terrible Adventure book. He's not into his wife, either, but he at least has the decency to torture himself quietly about it. He does need to own up and just say it. It looked like he was gearing up to, and then he veered into "I need my sleep" instead. His tone and cadence changed so much from the stress to the breezy BS excuse, he sounded like a different person. He's not handling this perfectly, and I think Brett deserves to be appreciated, but he's infinitely more self-aware and empathetic than old Bulgy Veins Lam up there. I completely tune out whenever it's time to watch Zach try to figure out which demon he's speaking to in what used to be the body of a woman named Michaela. The show telegraphed to us from the beginning that they won't make it. Why should I get invested? I know they love to legally bind decent, hopeful people to actual psychopaths just to nab three months of middling ad revenue, but there should at least be some minimum bar to clear in terms of "can't literally meet the diagnostic criteria for histrionic personality disorder" or "highly unlikely to lock someone out of their own home in the middle of the night." The chilaquiles looked good, but Slow Fuckin Talker Rachel needs to learn to entertain her slow little brain in Houston for part of the summer, just for her own slow sake. It's not exactly the middle of nowhere. I bet they have activities.

People on reddit are saying that NJ has a program where Ari can be on her parents’ insurance until age 31 and her baby could be added to that. There are probably several ways she could be insured here — I’m not too concerned about whether that’s true or how. I think the more salient point is whether it’s actually more affordable to bring the baby to America vs. having surgery done in Addis Ababa. If the numbers people are coming up with are true, there’s no question it’s cheaper to stay there. Not to mention, it’s probably a lot safer to have a routine procedure done locally than to drag an infant on commercial airlines during a pandemic. Ari and Avi both came out of the emergency C-section okay; it’s not like the Ethiopian medical system is all witch doctors and saliva poultices. Ari is lying, lazily, as usual. As much as I dislike her, I’m not super concerned about her demeanor toward the kid. She doesn’t seem to be having constant anxiety over/around him, which is good. There are plenty of adults around to help care for him, and there probably would be here, too. Ari may have had some trouble bonding with him because of the traumatic way he was born, but she hasn’t abandoned or neglected him. (Whether her reaction to the C-section was appropriate or not, it was clearly authentic.) Ari’s profound unlikability makes it easier to criticize her, but some of the expectations on her are unfair. She gets called out for never having a job (not progressive enough), but also for not performing motherhood “correctly” (not traditional enough). She’s been sufficiently overprotective and obnoxious about Avi on several occasions. I don’t mind not being subjected to baby talk and sloppily kissing sounds and other Mommy Porn footage that lazy TV producers love to fill time with.

It probably isn’t the real reason, but it’s the one she gave. When Ari told Bini she had already bought the plane ticket, I don’t know why, but I was shocked. She truly is a selfish, conniving little brat. Bini was a fool to get involved with her. If Ari’s father really can’t retire just because he’s supporting her (and as far as I can tell, this is just fanfic, not something anyone has actually confirmed), that’s on him for also being a fool. Of all the people to ruin your life for, we have 2-3 men lined up here who may have Plaxicoed themselves for Princess Piggy.

Yes, most women today are not going to be up for that plan. The ones who are typically meet men at a like-minded place like church or… IDK where else, honestly.

I enjoyed the other guys’ reactions!

I feel like I missed something about Ryan. When did he indicate that he's a cowboy who likes cowgirls? Hunting, fishing, two-stepping, playing golf, listening to Wade Bowen/Pat Green/Townes van Zandt, and dressing a bit fratty is just baseline "white guy from Texas who went to college for Business." (Obviously, these things can apply to other people in some combination -- not the point.) I bet he wears North Face fleeces with shorts, loafers and no socks, and owns a favorite drink cooler, too. If you've lived in Texas in your teens and twenties, there is a better than 50% chance you've been forced to two-step at some point. It is the dance of our people. Hanging out on ranches is equally likely, considering how much of our land is designated as "ranches." They're hard to avoid. I used to drive past South Fork on my way home from work. But maybe he did say "I am a blank-faced cowboy looking for my stoic lady pardner" and I didn't hear it? The promo materials that have everybody (except Zach?) yee-hawed up in ropers and lassos aren't helping anything, but it looks just as dissonant on Ryan as on any of them. However, he does win the Chuck Norris Lookalike contest hands-down. Brett looks like the mascot for a minor fast-food chain, Rachel looks like Deb from Napoleon Dynamite going to square dance lessons, Bao looks like Aunt Becky on vacation, Johnny looks like an extra from Pee-Wee's Big Adventure, Jose looks like the guy in the unwelcome mariachi band who won't GO TF AWAY from your table until you tip him at least $5, and Gil is rocking it but in the way that makes you think that the outfit is... detachable.

Agree with all this so much! Leah seems like a relatively bright and mature kid for her age. Over the past few seasons, I've gotten the feeling she may be leaning into the precocious thing a bit because she gets a lot of praise for it on social media and probably in real life, too. She's definitely aware of the cameras and shaping her responses accordingly (I'm sure at 11-13 I would've done the same in that situation). It's understandable why she's over Amber at this point and doesn't want to keep entertaining the cycle of disappearing and reappearing with over-the-top affection and apologies. That said, I think Gary is rather wisely looking at the long game here. He and Kristina annoy me at times, but they've done an admirable job of holding back on what they say publicly about Amber and not trying to turn Leah against her. No doubt they have done the vast majority of raising Leah, and Kristina is her real mom for all practical purposes, but it wouldn't help Leah at all to encourage her to avoid and look down on Amber. When she's older, she might resent them adding to that negativity and wonder if they influenced or alienated her. It benefits all three of them if all her memories are of them encouraging her to be successful and letting her choose how to feel about Amber. There's also a decent chance that someday Leah will want to have some kind of relationship with Amber. Gary is right to encourage her to leave that door open. It would be a lot to expect that level of maturity and forgiveness from an adolescent, but he's establishing the framework for her to consider it in the future. Regardless of how Amber conducts herself or whether she ever gets it together, Leah is better off living with less resentment and not being forced to take sides between her bio parents. It cracks me up when Tyler has a moment of clarity like that. He is occasionally capable of some good insights. He is also capable of yelling on top of everyone, openly expressing disgust at his own children's gender reveals, and getting... lots... of Battoos (Batman tattoos but they deserve a portmanteau). But he has his moments. Mackenzie is the worst and Josh is The Actual Worst. I understand some kids are difficult, even when parents do their best, and I can deal with that (as long as they don't bring them on airplanes). But when parents see their kid causing havoc and being hateful to others, hear him shrieking at frequencies that cause actual physical distress to other humans, and are told almost daily that the kid is physically assaulting his teacher, and they JUST SHRUG IT OFF? Fuck them. "I don't know how to discipline! I can't stick with it!" Well suck it up, babydoll. Nobody likes your child and he's in for a lifetime of failure, confusion, and isolation because nobody -- particularly, his primary caregivers (that's you, hon) -- is helping him learn how to interact, express himself, and treat people and things with respect. "That's just how boys are. He'll be fine. Nobody tells me how to parent my kid." OK, great strategy, sounds a lot like the approach taken by the "Affluenza" parents a few years back. I recall that ending smoothly. Just for fun, a thought exercise: is that just how boys are? Or is it just how maladaptive, antisocial future inmates are? PS: I grew up in a home where spit cups were a thing. It's probably better than smoking in a lot of ways, but let's just say there are certain sensory experiences that you never recover from... and you learn to never trust an open Dr Pepper can.